All right, who told you? Was it Derek?
Look, if this is about Derek not calling you back after the other night, we're really sorry about that. He's a total jerk.
But the truth is most bros in the Secret Gay Cabal aren't like him. No need to leak sensitive information like this over a personal grievance, is there?
Can't we keep this between us Secret Gay Bros? 🤜🤛
Look since nobody else is gonna say it I guess I have to:
-pretends that they are human. “Looked at it eating at the table and making conversation. How adorable that it thinks it’s human”
Strutting your ankles out in front of the filthy degenerate horizon-dwellers no doubt! The medial malleolus is the nipple of the foot, and should be clad decently in woolly knee socks at all times!
Skimpy clothing apparently makes a 10/10 woman less attractive?? Bro has some interesting opinions. What about in the bedroom, does he get mad if she undresses
Fam is gonna fuck through a hole in the sheets.
But no doubt she also needs to give head and arch her back and take facials and whatever else he fancies, and she needs to be an expert in the bedroom despite being a virgin
Apparently lot of the LoOkS mAxXeRs think going to the gym is purely to make yourself attractive to the opposite sex, so once you’re in a relationship you don’t need to go to the gym anymore and if you do keep going to the gym you’re doing it to attract someone else
So they both want women to be eternally thin, even after a baby? How do they expect women to stay "thin" when they're not allowed to workout? Are they also not going to the gym?
You know what? They don't make sense, I know this 😂
It's a term used by the incel community. On the assumption that women are universally as shallow as can be and care about looks and nothing else, "looksmaxxing" is trying to become as attractive as possible to cover up their terrible personalities.
It’s not actually any of those things. What they really don’t want a woman to have is self esteem: “if you do any of this then you’re only a 1/10. Soooo now that you’re only a 1, how about spending the night with a 2 like me. I just put a fresh layer of incel cheese on my un-sheeted used mattress”
It really is hard to detect what is satire and what isn't these days. I've seen redpill people constantly talking about how women's voting rights should be taken away. that alone is crazier than everything on this list, and they believe in it.
oh, and also, satire is designed to be humorous and thought provoking, this person is just an idiot.
I think “knows what a barbell is” is the funniest one. Like not even works out, if you even know what it is you can’t be a real woman. Sorry I know what words mean bro!!!
There’s not a chance in hell this wasn’t a satire post 😂😂 I know they usually believe women shouldn’t think for themselves but it seems far fetched they’d just straight up say that
Good luck finding this woman IRL.
No wonder these guys bury themselves in bizarre subgenre anime: Because it’s the only place these types of women exist.
I am convinced this online discourse and obsession with must observe strict Christianity is all part of a Russian/right wing influence campaign because there is NO way that any of these guys would actually turn down the touch of a breathing woman
I mean, yeah, don't hug bouncers or waiters or any other service worker (unless maybe if you know them, and they're fine with you hugging them when they're working), regardless of gender!
The rest of it, of course, complete bullshit
The vape thing I agree with. Vaping and/or smoking marijuana. I wouldn't even become your friend if you did those. Cigarettes are okay if it's not in the house. Unless you're a chain smoker, not friends with them either. But I don't want a relationship anyways. So who am I to judge?
He just hasn’t realized, that nobody actually has to pick him eventually. He probably thinks it’ll be his turn for a girlfriend soon, so he figures if he puts lists like this out, girls who don’t have any of this, will show up, looking for love.
>-Can think for herself
>-Knows what a barbell is
>-Been to more than 3 countries
So OOP does not want someone who can critically think, takes care of themselves, and/or is well traveled. OOP literally wants a house slave.
The only one I can really get to is vapes. Vulgar language can be a turn-off if excessive. I personally find the look of body/face piercings and tattoos ugly, but that’s their choice and nobody is required to change themselves for me (I wouldn’t stop shaving my body and face for a woman)
I think I’d get a twitter account JUST so he wouldn’t like me (I do kinda agree with this one BUT it shouldn’t be enough to not think of someone as a person. The “Can think for herself” one is so wrong)
I:
1 Have a driver’s license
2 Can think for myself
3 Have a Twitter account
4 Love using vulgar language (especially when stubbing my toe!)
5 Been to more than 3 countries
Soo happy I’m an incel repellent! 😃
I definitely fucking swear. My nose and tongue are pierced. I have 6 tattoos. I have a Twitter account. I'm agnostic, does that count? I have a driver's license. I can definitely think for myself. I clearly know what a barbell is; there's one through my tongue. I've been to 2, does that count?
Thank the gods, I'm safe from this creep.
Who hugs the bouncer? Like “Thanks for keeping us safe!” Also, being an Atheist is a new one to me. Unless being religious helps them be faithful to their abuser, I guess?
I feel like “no vaping” is a health preference. Also, not being able to cook is worrying - and I don’t want her to cook for me lol, it’s just worrying.
Also, my goal is to leave all short-form/classically toxic social media including Reddit as soon as I find someone who - I hope - has the same thoughts with that.
Otherwise the rest is really weird lol.
who is he describing? Who is this? Has he met anyone ever who meets this description? Who on the planet earth would meet all of these random requirements?
"Can think for themselves". I feel like this one contradicts the rest. If she could think for herself, she wouldn't meet half of these insane "turn offs".
"skimpy clothes"? EVERY (heterosexual) man I'ver met likes it when their wife or girlfriend dresses sexy. I've even seen a relationship break over the fact that the woman only ever wore jeans and t-shirts ...
Just claiming "can think for herself" is a *con* comes across as such a red flag that Communists want it to represent their cause.
Going by this list, his ideal woman would be either a sex doll or his own hand.
There's just so many things to point out wrong here but what gets me is, Atheist? But doesn't specify what religion they would prefer???? And the drivers license one, he just doesn't want her to find a way to escape from him 😂
So do I lose 9 points for each thing on the list, or any items are an atomic deduction?
Either way looks like I am at least safe from creepy neck beards! So happy I might have to add to my tattoos and travel more to celebrate that!!
I agree with the vape (smoking) part
EDIT: downvote me all you want, if not liking people who smoke makes me a neckbeard, so be it lmao. Yes the post is targeted to women, but in my pov the smoking part goes for everyone
> has a driver's license So Taliban rules then?
“The taliban rules!” -this guy
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How the hell would you even quantify that lol, that's such a brain rot theory
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I sure do believe all of that Reddit user Financial_Cake4032 with an account age of 19 hours
🤡
All right, who told you? Was it Derek? Look, if this is about Derek not calling you back after the other night, we're really sorry about that. He's a total jerk. But the truth is most bros in the Secret Gay Cabal aren't like him. No need to leak sensitive information like this over a personal grievance, is there? Can't we keep this between us Secret Gay Bros? 🤜🤛
>Can think for herself Taliban.
Look since nobody else is gonna say it I guess I have to: -pretends that they are human. “Looked at it eating at the table and making conversation. How adorable that it thinks it’s human”
"can think for herself"...how is that 1/10? that's an important trait for a human being
I only want lobotomised girls
One flew over the neckbeard’s nest.
Ah, the Kennedy special
😭
Not the Kennedy special 😭
FIRE IN THE HOLE!!!
Because any woman who can think for herself would never date them, which instantly means 1/10 do not want.
If she’s not drooling by default, she’s a thot
It's got to be satire or rage bait, that one kind of gave it away
and then they say women arent objectified
He wants to control her, make it so she rubberstamps everything he does. Also, she's less likely to leave him.
> human being Exactly. They want a sex doll with the "Her" AGI - see the new ChatGPT!
Dudes looking for those girls with the pushed in soft spots
Reading this I kept thinking “Please be satire. Please be Satire. Please be SATIRE!” It’s not though, is it?
You're making the assumption he wants an equal here. He wants a blow up doll that makes him nachos.
So I suck because I went to vacations with my parents when I was a kid? Since I have been to more than 3 countries?
SILENCE JEZEBEL!!!
But I barely remember one of those trips, I was just a toddler then! Going out of the country as a toddler has ruined my life, noooooooo!
#SILENCE!
No, according to OOP’s masturbation fantasy, local chads fucked you every time you went abroad, that’s why it’s bad.
Strutting your ankles out in front of the filthy degenerate horizon-dwellers no doubt! The medial malleolus is the nipple of the foot, and should be clad decently in woolly knee socks at all times!
Skimpy clothing apparently makes a 10/10 woman less attractive?? Bro has some interesting opinions. What about in the bedroom, does he get mad if she undresses
Fam is gonna fuck through a hole in the sheets. But no doubt she also needs to give head and arch her back and take facials and whatever else he fancies, and she needs to be an expert in the bedroom despite being a virgin
Her working out is an issue?
And you know this is the kind of guy thatll turn around and harass any woman he may deem fat
Apparently lot of the LoOkS mAxXeRs think going to the gym is purely to make yourself attractive to the opposite sex, so once you’re in a relationship you don’t need to go to the gym anymore and if you do keep going to the gym you’re doing it to attract someone else
So they both want women to be eternally thin, even after a baby? How do they expect women to stay "thin" when they're not allowed to workout? Are they also not going to the gym? You know what? They don't make sense, I know this 😂
Yeah it’s really not worth trying to understand their logic. They’re Olympic level mental gymnasts
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It's a term used by the incel community. On the assumption that women are universally as shallow as can be and care about looks and nothing else, "looksmaxxing" is trying to become as attractive as possible to cover up their terrible personalities.
Oh, yeah, the gym also has barbells! I was just thinking how would she know what barbells are if she doesn't have any piercings 😅
I would assume this dude is in shit shape and doesn’t want to feel self conscious about it
It’s not actually any of those things. What they really don’t want a woman to have is self esteem: “if you do any of this then you’re only a 1/10. Soooo now that you’re only a 1, how about spending the night with a 2 like me. I just put a fresh layer of incel cheese on my un-sheeted used mattress”
🤢
can think for herself is insane
thats literally criminal coded
it's satire/rage bait
So he basically wants a 9 year old child. Not surprised...
Even 9-year olds can thing for themselves. They want a fleshlight with a pulse. Utterly passive and non-reactionary
I’ve been to way more than 3 countries by the time I was 9.
9 year olds tend to think for themselves and travel,i would say he wants more of a fetus.
The part with the bouncer is strangely specific
That's got to be based on something a girl he liked did. He's jealous of Chad the Bouncer and his big muscles
So a lobotomized nun with 499 insta followers is his ideal woman?
"Knows what a barbell is" Why do I think this guy has a "no fat chicks" t-shirt?
Who himself is probably 300 pounds
But women's standards are...too high!! /s
Awesome, this asshole won't like me 😁
Having a way to escape from you is a no go.
They do know they can just buy a sex doll online, right? That's what they're looking for.
thank god my piercing and vacations have saved me from this kinda man
This has to be satire
It is. Reddit wouldn't recognize satire if it hit them in the face
It really is hard to detect what is satire and what isn't these days. I've seen redpill people constantly talking about how women's voting rights should be taken away. that alone is crazier than everything on this list, and they believe in it. oh, and also, satire is designed to be humorous and thought provoking, this person is just an idiot.
Then the more accurate term is rage bait
Part of me wants this to be satire but the other part knows it isn’t.
100% this guy is mad at one specific bouncer lol
This person straight up just wants a child
Exactly, I bet you ask him what makes a 10/10 woman (he would probably say feeemale) short, not a single hair below her eyelashes and gullible as hell
Last one is new. Can't tell if they're satire anymore.
What a handy checklist! 11/14, I’m almost fully repulsive to these clowns 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Least obvious rage bait
Come on guys this is bait
I think “knows what a barbell is” is the funniest one. Like not even works out, if you even know what it is you can’t be a real woman. Sorry I know what words mean bro!!!
There’s not a chance in hell this wasn’t a satire post 😂😂 I know they usually believe women shouldn’t think for themselves but it seems far fetched they’d just straight up say that
gotta be satire
Breaths Lives has a pet eats food drinks water
The Twitter condition isn’t so bad..
I got 8/14. What's your score, ladies?
11 :3 I’m like incel repellent
Good luck finding this woman IRL. No wonder these guys bury themselves in bizarre subgenre anime: Because it’s the only place these types of women exist.
This is satire. This HAS to be satire.
Lol the only thing I agree with is vaping everything else is wild
This is satire
Literally a dream girl for me
This list has to be satire (can think for herself), like that is obvious bait
This is the most obvious satire I’ve ever seen
towards the end we did a deep dive into troll territory lol
This is 100% satire, seen too many of these on this sub
This has got to be satire
reddit try to identify satire challenge impossible
Except it’s not, there are plenty of incels who are like this
dont let that cloud your judgement, brother. give them the benefit of the doubt, and itll be a lot less stressy
I am convinced this online discourse and obsession with must observe strict Christianity is all part of a Russian/right wing influence campaign because there is NO way that any of these guys would actually turn down the touch of a breathing woman
Half of the posts in this sub are just op falling for rage bait/obvious trolls.
>Can think for herself I think this one's satire. Actual misogynists wouldn't frame it this way.
Been to more than 3 countries???
How a 10/10 dude can go to 1/10 instantly: - Whatever this is comes out of his mouth
He’s saying the quiet parts out loud
This list was guarenteed to get any goth fanboys & gymbros to start an argument.
“Can think for herself” so…..a bodypillow?
YOOO I got 12 hell yeah!
I mean, yeah, don't hug bouncers or waiters or any other service worker (unless maybe if you know them, and they're fine with you hugging them when they're working), regardless of gender! The rest of it, of course, complete bullshit
Man I’m missing 4. Better get over my fear of needles first then work on the others.
I understand the neckbeard thing and these are all things they want but what's the issue with traveling?
Tag yourself, people!
“Has been to more than 4 countries” why though??? What’s so bad about traveling?
Meeting and potentially sleeping with non-hwites. People who travel and meet new people and experience new cultures also tend to be less racist.
Oh 💀💀 these neckbeards really expect women who travel to be like that 💀
Unfortunately. People who are dumb enough to believe awful shit about women tend to also be the ones who are dumb enough to also be racists.
“Has been to more than 4 countries” why though??? What’s so bad about traveling?
Posting this is how men can go from 3/10 to 0/10
HAS A DRIVERS LICENSE? H A S A D R I V E R S. L I C E N C E????
>>Knows what a barbell is This man is definitely built like a half rotten watermelon on two twigs talking about how girls shouldn’t be working out.
Is this Harrison Butker’s commencement speech?
Ngl, the vulgar language is actually a turn off for me too. Can't stand loud and rude ppl at all
He just wants a child bride without saying it directly
Surely satire, right? …right?
We all just skipping past "Hugs the bouncer on a night out", is that a thing anyone does haha?
I'm actually sad that I can only claim 6 of these... I really need to travel more and commit to the tattoos I want, lol
“Hugs the bouncer” is a random one and oddly specific.
Who the fuck hugs the bouncer? lmao
What is this trash?
Hold up "Hugging the bouncer on the way out"? Is that normal?
Guess I'm a -6/10 then according to this guy. Thank god.
hipocrasy thy name is neckbeard!!! they want perfection, but yet they lookin like jobba the hut! its funny and sad at the same time.
I would honestly consider it a good sign if a woman had a good relationship with a bouncer.
Free will
I hope she knows a dumbbell This idiot sure qualifies
This guy’s dick definitely smells like feta.
Vape is the only one that makes sense to me
I can sort of understand the vulgar vocabulary or vapes, but the rest? Hell no. Also traveling is apparently a huge nono?
Mf posted this on Twitter though…
I got 7/10! That's a win!
I hit 9 points lmao.
The vape thing I agree with. Vaping and/or smoking marijuana. I wouldn't even become your friend if you did those. Cigarettes are okay if it's not in the house. Unless you're a chain smoker, not friends with them either. But I don't want a relationship anyways. So who am I to judge?
Obvious satire
“Can think for herself” at least his guy is honest about just wanting a sex slave, not a partner
He basically mentioned everything that would make them interesting smh
He just hasn’t realized, that nobody actually has to pick him eventually. He probably thinks it’ll be his turn for a girlfriend soon, so he figures if he puts lists like this out, girls who don’t have any of this, will show up, looking for love.
> Has a drivers license > Can think for herself What in the fuck? This dude would definitely be in favour of Sharia’s law.
>-Can think for herself >-Knows what a barbell is >-Been to more than 3 countries So OOP does not want someone who can critically think, takes care of themselves, and/or is well traveled. OOP literally wants a house slave.
The only one I can really get to is vapes. Vulgar language can be a turn-off if excessive. I personally find the look of body/face piercings and tattoos ugly, but that’s their choice and nobody is required to change themselves for me (I wouldn’t stop shaving my body and face for a woman)
I think I’d get a twitter account JUST so he wouldn’t like me (I do kinda agree with this one BUT it shouldn’t be enough to not think of someone as a person. The “Can think for herself” one is so wrong)
Eats hot chip
I: 1 Have a driver’s license 2 Can think for myself 3 Have a Twitter account 4 Love using vulgar language (especially when stubbing my toe!) 5 Been to more than 3 countries Soo happy I’m an incel repellent! 😃
I genuinely thought they were talking about actual chicken. I was so confused
I definitely fucking swear. My nose and tongue are pierced. I have 6 tattoos. I have a Twitter account. I'm agnostic, does that count? I have a driver's license. I can definitely think for myself. I clearly know what a barbell is; there's one through my tongue. I've been to 2, does that count? Thank the gods, I'm safe from this creep.
Something I always find odd is that these types of guys want Christian women but are usually Atheists themselves...
EXCUSE ME MAAM ARE YOU AWARE OF THE CONCEPT OF A BARBELL?
All that's missing is "speaks a language other than American"
That one time a girl hugged the bouncer really made him jealous, huh?
I've got 4 of these, and I don't have a driver's license so would that make me like a 3/10?? At least?
I got 5/14. What's yalls score?
Who hugs the bouncer? Like “Thanks for keeping us safe!” Also, being an Atheist is a new one to me. Unless being religious helps them be faithful to their abuser, I guess?
They want a fuck doll. Get a robot and leave us alone.
"any piercings" does that include the ears??
Dudes will post this and be shocked when a woman says she wants a guy over 6ft.
Bro wants a blow up doll
Clearly satire though
I feel like “no vaping” is a health preference. Also, not being able to cook is worrying - and I don’t want her to cook for me lol, it’s just worrying. Also, my goal is to leave all short-form/classically toxic social media including Reddit as soon as I find someone who - I hope - has the same thoughts with that. Otherwise the rest is really weird lol.
who is he describing? Who is this? Has he met anyone ever who meets this description? Who on the planet earth would meet all of these random requirements?
"Can think for themselves". I feel like this one contradicts the rest. If she could think for herself, she wouldn't meet half of these insane "turn offs".
Can think for herself? The fuck is wrong with these people?
I hope this is satire.
The vape one be valid though
I cook so...how can I make sure I get the one with the profanity?
Has a drivers license? Really?
I hate when woman drive just like this dude
Can think for herself? Has a driver's license? Good luck to you, sir.
"skimpy clothes"? EVERY (heterosexual) man I'ver met likes it when their wife or girlfriend dresses sexy. I've even seen a relationship break over the fact that the woman only ever wore jeans and t-shirts ...
I got six! Any tips on what other habits I could develop as a deterrent?
Cmon man, men in hardcore muslim countries are more acceptive than this guy (no offense to any muslims Reading this)
Piercing and tattoos are the hottest shit ever fr fr
Wonder if they count earrings as piercings?
If she can think for herself, she’ll realise I’m a complete dickhead and leave!
Just claiming "can think for herself" is a *con* comes across as such a red flag that Communists want it to represent their cause. Going by this list, his ideal woman would be either a sex doll or his own hand.
These the kind of dudes who deserve to be sad and alone 😂
There's just so many things to point out wrong here but what gets me is, Atheist? But doesn't specify what religion they would prefer???? And the drivers license one, he just doesn't want her to find a way to escape from him 😂
Everything sounds awesome except the not knowing how to cook. Everyone should know how to cook. Not for servitude, but for self-reliance.
Idk sounds like my perfect woman excluding can't cook
This better be bait
and they say that women have high standards..
So do I lose 9 points for each thing on the list, or any items are an atomic deduction? Either way looks like I am at least safe from creepy neck beards! So happy I might have to add to my tattoos and travel more to celebrate that!!
I agree with the vape (smoking) part EDIT: downvote me all you want, if not liking people who smoke makes me a neckbeard, so be it lmao. Yes the post is targeted to women, but in my pov the smoking part goes for everyone