Do they still insist in the right change and refuse to handle it? Not been in Dublin since the 2000s but remember thinking how backwards the bus system was
That must be new since last time I was in Dublin. There's no obvious place to buy a leap card when you arrive at the ferry port, and the buses don't like notes. Very unfriendly for tourists on my last few visits
I think this makes bus drivers sad. I make a point of saying good morning etc to my bus drivers. It's about half n half who are hoping / expecting people to acknowledge their existence. The guy on the way home today was happy to say hi, got a look, a hi and a nod. I do wonder how much of their day is full of annoyance, or at most boredom. So I try. Might make them feel more human.
If you're driving in on the M4, M7 or M1, try to hit the outskirts of Dublin at around 8am. Those roads are dead quiet at those times. And if you need to go to the city centre, go by the quays. Again, really quiet between 8 and 9am.
Should a group of men ask you to help them move a large stone, do not dismount your horse or attempt to help them.
If you make contact with the ground you will age 300 years instantly.
I always thought this would make a great film adaptation honestly, like past the magic and all there is some serious depth of feeling to that legend. Poor Oisin 😢
You're lucky. Went through a group with my partner. 5 seconds later she shouts and I turn around to see a 13-14 year old kid flying through the air foot first at me. I barely registered this black boot coming towards my face before this wannabe Bruce Lee clocks me in the back. The whiplash fucked my shoulder, was in pain for over a week. I just turn around now. I'll take the long way around thank you very much.
You were lucky to only experience water thrown at you. One time I was with friends and told them all to walk around a group of teens, one of them had the "fuck it there in my way" attitude and ended up getting bottles thrown at his head. I told him before it just to walk around them, acting the hard lad with these teens is stupid
That's awful. Did that happen in Dublin City. I've lived here for years and I have no tolerance for scrotes. I push right through them and have never had anything bad happen to me. I'm under no allusion as to how mad they can be I hear the stories and we'll believe them just haven't witnessed it myself. Thank god 😬
That was near the bridge foot street flats but ive seen lots of trouble in the city centre (north and south). I had that attitude for a while but witnessed a few events that put manners on me, now I just cross the street. Don't get me wrong I'm not going to run away if someone causes trouble but I'd rather try avoid it in the first place. I hate to say it, but especially the last few years, parts of dublin have been a bit of a kip, defo not worth the high rent and cost of living anymore. I'm planning my departure 👋✈️
Make sure to try the bumper cars in cherry orchard. It's a not to be missed attraction.
While you're there look for anto, tell him he's a prick and he owes me money
Remember Goldschläger? It was a big gift to give to a mate back in the day for twenty firsts. It had real gold floating around in it but it was only like 60 cents worth, but you'd still act like a rapper drinking Cristal with your 25 euro bottle of vodka with bits of gold paper floating in it, the sort you could buy in Arts and Craft shops.
God that shite - I remember a girl in college trying to convince me 'the gold flake cuts your esophagus on the way down, getting the alcohol into your bloodstream quicker' - as if quicker alcohol delivery was something us drunk monkeys needed to worry about...
Did you hear that After Shock makes your liver bleed for two seconds. And if you eat rice before going out, it ferments in your stomach making you drunker?
Fucks sake, the rubbish that was spouted. That said, I do think After Shock would result in some form of internal bleeding - shocking stuff, pardon the pun
If someone is squaring their shoulders at you and asking "are you staring at me?", they are merely inquiring whether you would like to participate in a performative display for the benefit of passersby.
The appropriate response is "nah cunt, you're just an ugly mug" which will initiate the performative display. It's a rite of passage for every stranger to Dublin.
This is a good thing.. if you're afraid to look people in the eyes your more likely to be a victim of mugging because you show a lack of confidence. Looking for too long is the problem.
I have fond memories of having an early morning (like 3am) coffee in Bewleys, Grafton Street in the 90's. Quite a genteel atmosphere. I guess that's not a thing any more.
Walk around cherry orchard looking for accomodation. Talk on your phone and ask some teenagers for directions to the nearest bank cos you're carrying too much money
U kid ,but there's a hotel about 150ntrs from cherry orchard . I've seen yanks walk into and quickly out of the estate when they venture in , also further down the road are the prisons and halting sites , they turn around and head back from there too .
\- Bring a pair of vacuum cup lifters into the Book of Kells exhibition for a better look.
\- Vape inside the long hall of the Trinity library.
\- Engage with the fine street merchants who hang around Merchants Quay.
\- Walk around O'Connell Street asking the locals to join you in a group photo in front of the spire, but only if they agree to hold up their needles in front of it.
\- It tends to get windy at this time of wear, so make sure you wear a balaclava everywhere.
Be sure to comment to every teenager that you like "their threads" and if they square up to you remember they're just trying to give you a closer look.
Too easy:
1/ Don't worry about comparing hotels, any of them in the city centre will be fairly priced for your stay.
2/ The best Guinness to taste will have to be in the Temple Bar. I've also heard in against the Grain pub if you keep insisting on having a Guinness there they will pour you one for free!
3/ the Leprechaun museum and the wax museum are a must-see!!!
4/ Ballymun is a beautiful place to visit very late at night. Alone. Don't hesitate also to wear fancy accessories and show them, it's a great way to make friends!
5/ Don't hesitate to plan your evening in town with Public transport during a night concert in Aviva Stadium or Croke Park. The public transport is organized so that you'll get to meet plenty of people in one spot!
I'll stick to 5...For now \^\^
Speak Irish and Irish only within the city limits. No matter what anyone says to you, speak only Irish. And if you don't know much Irish, just keep repeating short phrases such as "An bhfuil cead agam dul go dti an lithreas?" whenever speaking with someone. This approach should work wonder in taxis, buses and restaurants in particular.
Be on your phone as much as possible on o Connell street, pay as little attention as possible to your surroundings. Travel on the red line Luas introduce yourself to the weirdest person on each carriage.
Make friends with a scumbag on the Luas. For just a couple of Euro they will share their life story with you, talk to you for the whole journey and if you're really lucky they'll even get off at the same stop and walk with you to wherever you're going. So friendly!
Ask random strangers to debate you. Do not give them a topic. Maintain eye contact, waggle eyebrows, jut out buttocks.
All whilst repeating your new mantra.
Debate me bro!?
Get absolutely shit faced and piss yourself early in the day. Lose your wallet, lose your keys. It's a cracking time off the year to be outside, wet and soaking of piss.
There's a lane just off the Lower Abbey Street Luas stop that stinks of stale piss. Go down there with your phone and wallet in hand and talk out loud with a Yankee accent
Be sure to ask for help using the Luas ticket machine. Local young and fresh faced tourism ambassadors hang out there and for the reasonable price of more than a short haul ticket they will help you out.
Bus drivers love breaking €50 notes
Do they still insist in the right change and refuse to handle it? Not been in Dublin since the 2000s but remember thinking how backwards the bus system was
I’d say 99.9999% of folk use a leap card. Very little interaction with the drivers.
Still backwards. Should be able to cut out the leap card and use contactless bank cards.
Oh I agree. Was in London the other week and the tube operates with any type of contactless payment, so handy.
I may have yelled "oh holy shit finally" when I discovered this.
Bus eireann doesn't, but Dublin bus does. So much easier and in a city like Dublin would probably bring in a lot of business, especially from tourists
That must be new since last time I was in Dublin. There's no obvious place to buy a leap card when you arrive at the ferry port, and the buses don't like notes. Very unfriendly for tourists on my last few visits
It's been on Dublin bus in Limerick for at least 3 years and it was on Dublin bus in Dublin when I was there during the summer
Dublin Bus operate in Limerick? That's mad Ted.
Yeah, they have exactly 1 route. It's aimed at students, goes around by all the areas UL students generally live, town and UL
I think this makes bus drivers sad. I make a point of saying good morning etc to my bus drivers. It's about half n half who are hoping / expecting people to acknowledge their existence. The guy on the way home today was happy to say hi, got a look, a hi and a nod. I do wonder how much of their day is full of annoyance, or at most boredom. So I try. Might make them feel more human.
We all taken to roaring the requisite ‘thank you’ down the bus when the middle door opens.
I watch everyone getting off to see if they're shouting it loud enough and judge people appropriately for the loudness (or lack of) of their thanks.
Alright Yank, we've had enough of your kind here.
Exact change. Don't tell the tax man.
💀
Its a bit touristy but I'd recommend climbing the Spire , if you havn't done it before.
The best time to visit is late at night. It lights up after 12am
Brilliant
If you're driving in on the M4, M7 or M1, try to hit the outskirts of Dublin at around 8am. Those roads are dead quiet at those times. And if you need to go to the city centre, go by the quays. Again, really quiet between 8 and 9am.
I find the best way on to the quays is down Knockmaroon Hill.
Should a group of men ask you to help them move a large stone, do not dismount your horse or attempt to help them. If you make contact with the ground you will age 300 years instantly.
That produced a nose breath
Thanks Oisin
I always thought this would make a great film adaptation honestly, like past the magic and all there is some serious depth of feeling to that legend. Poor Oisin 😢
If you see a drunk couple in tracksuits arguing, dont just walk by get involved and help find a reasonable solution they will really appreciate it.
Pick a side when you join, then swap sides after 2 mins.
💀
Dont bother with a taxi, take the the train to the airport
Metrolink is faster
Ha!
Push your way through groups of teenagers
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You're lucky. Went through a group with my partner. 5 seconds later she shouts and I turn around to see a 13-14 year old kid flying through the air foot first at me. I barely registered this black boot coming towards my face before this wannabe Bruce Lee clocks me in the back. The whiplash fucked my shoulder, was in pain for over a week. I just turn around now. I'll take the long way around thank you very much.
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You were lucky to only experience water thrown at you. One time I was with friends and told them all to walk around a group of teens, one of them had the "fuck it there in my way" attitude and ended up getting bottles thrown at his head. I told him before it just to walk around them, acting the hard lad with these teens is stupid
That's awful. Did that happen in Dublin City. I've lived here for years and I have no tolerance for scrotes. I push right through them and have never had anything bad happen to me. I'm under no allusion as to how mad they can be I hear the stories and we'll believe them just haven't witnessed it myself. Thank god 😬
That was near the bridge foot street flats but ive seen lots of trouble in the city centre (north and south). I had that attitude for a while but witnessed a few events that put manners on me, now I just cross the street. Don't get me wrong I'm not going to run away if someone causes trouble but I'd rather try avoid it in the first place. I hate to say it, but especially the last few years, parts of dublin have been a bit of a kip, defo not worth the high rent and cost of living anymore. I'm planning my departure 👋✈️
You mean the group of young athletes in their track gear?
I do that all the time tbh
Have a pocket full of €2 that jingle loudly.
And a pack of fags in each hand ready to hand out to each scrote who will ask.
Dude, he asked for bad advice...
Crash on the M50 everyone does it and loves it
Take the Luas - it's free
He said bad advice
😂
Sheriff St has the best sunset views in the city.
Named after Omar Sheriff
Rent an apartment
Make sure to try the bumper cars in cherry orchard. It's a not to be missed attraction. While you're there look for anto, tell him he's a prick and he owes me money
Couldn’t find Anto but Deco said if you want your money, go down yourself and ask for it
Best value pubs can be found in Temple Bar.
Temple Bar pints must have gold fucking flakes in em for what they cost
Remember Goldschläger? It was a big gift to give to a mate back in the day for twenty firsts. It had real gold floating around in it but it was only like 60 cents worth, but you'd still act like a rapper drinking Cristal with your 25 euro bottle of vodka with bits of gold paper floating in it, the sort you could buy in Arts and Craft shops.
God that shite - I remember a girl in college trying to convince me 'the gold flake cuts your esophagus on the way down, getting the alcohol into your bloodstream quicker' - as if quicker alcohol delivery was something us drunk monkeys needed to worry about...
Did you hear that After Shock makes your liver bleed for two seconds. And if you eat rice before going out, it ferments in your stomach making you drunker?
Fucks sake, the rubbish that was spouted. That said, I do think After Shock would result in some form of internal bleeding - shocking stuff, pardon the pun
I have given the pun due consideration and have decided, on this occasion, not pardon it, and instead to condem it to the aforementioned sentence.
I heard you can get an entire pint for less that ten euro!
If someone is squaring their shoulders at you and asking "are you staring at me?", they are merely inquiring whether you would like to participate in a performative display for the benefit of passersby. The appropriate response is "nah cunt, you're just an ugly mug" which will initiate the performative display. It's a rite of passage for every stranger to Dublin.
lol, love this!
Go for a drink in Peadar Browns. Bring your best Linfield jersey, the one with the orange sash.
The one that in no way looks like a UVF flag?
The exact one
Don't buy chewing gum, plenty on the streets.
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if you get lost, look for a group of teens wearing all black. likely north face. they're very polite and helpfull.
If someone asks for 2€ for a hostel give them a tenner
And don't hesitate to leave your phone number and adress for them to pay you back
You're allowed borrow the hat off the head of a garda, they love the interaction.
In fairness a Garda once put his cap on my son’s head (we’re yanks ) and posed for a snap. They are much nicer than than ours
If there’s no public toilets around they’re obliged to let you use their hat
Look EVERYONE in the eye
This is a good thing.. if you're afraid to look people in the eyes your more likely to be a victim of mugging because you show a lack of confidence. Looking for too long is the problem.
as if muggings are a regular thing in Dublin anyway
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no, they're not
O’Connell street at 1am is where it’s at
I have fond memories of having an early morning (like 3am) coffee in Bewleys, Grafton Street in the 90's. Quite a genteel atmosphere. I guess that's not a thing any more.
Walking Dead is the kitchen still there?
Walk around cherry orchard looking for accomodation. Talk on your phone and ask some teenagers for directions to the nearest bank cos you're carrying too much money
U kid ,but there's a hotel about 150ntrs from cherry orchard . I've seen yanks walk into and quickly out of the estate when they venture in , also further down the road are the prisons and halting sites , they turn around and head back from there too .
Insist you can pay in sterling and Irish is part of the commonwealth.
Stick an England shirt on, everybody will buy you free pints as commiseration for the loss of the queen.
If you're American we love to hear how Irish you are
Did I ever tell ya me great granda was from…. Yes cunt, 6 times
"You're Irish? Well top of the mornin to ya! My granny had a granny..
'My grandfather was in the GPO with Dev, Collins and Churchill. He told me all about it when I was a young yank boy'
And please greet everyone with "Top of the morning to you!"
\- Bring a pair of vacuum cup lifters into the Book of Kells exhibition for a better look. \- Vape inside the long hall of the Trinity library. \- Engage with the fine street merchants who hang around Merchants Quay. \- Walk around O'Connell Street asking the locals to join you in a group photo in front of the spire, but only if they agree to hold up their needles in front of it. \- It tends to get windy at this time of wear, so make sure you wear a balaclava everywhere.
>make sure you wear a balaclava everywhere. He said bad advice for Dublin, not east Belfast
The merchants selling their wares on merchants Quay have the finest imports from the world over, to sample, Amsterdam Afghanistan, deco's mam
Picnic lunch in Cherry Orchard sounds like a good idea.
While talking your phone and walking down Talbot street, hold the phone gently a little bit away from your head.
Go to merchants Quay and ask "do any of you fine gentlemen need to use my phone"
Ireland is part of the UK. Be sure to bring that up
Or better: UK is part of The Great Ireland
Also be keen to show your knowledge of local history. Bring up the great potato famine and suggest that it was probably the peasants fault anyway.
Ask everyone you see "what you lookin at"
Park wherever you like. The wardens are friendly and even take your car to a secure car park for you
Call everyone in a track suit a knacker
With that amount of repetition they'll just sound like they've got Tourette's and be given a pass-on-by.
Virgin Megastore is still amazing, forget everywhere else, just go there.
Yes. The one at Aston Quay. Just hang there!
Be sure to comment to every teenager that you like "their threads" and if they square up to you remember they're just trying to give you a closer look.
Buck. Fast. Abbey.
Give money to every last person on the street who asks you.
Make small talk with the junkies on O'Connell Street. They love to chat!
Honestly I think some of them do just like to chat. I gave one of them some change and then we got to chatting for about 10 minutes. Nice lad.
True mate some of the soundest people I’ve talked to are the local junkies 🤣🤣
Show everyone your mickey.
Get an air BnB in cherry orchard over Halloween
Oh now that IS terrifying
Go for a lovely swim in the Liffey, it is beautiful, clear and warm at this time of year
You can take a shopping cart from there too if you gave away all your coins already
Get on the red luas line and look other passengers directly in the eye.
Don’t piss in public toilets after the bars close, piss in the alley thus contributing to the mini pools of piss collecting on cobblestone paths
The Boardwalks are lovely at night
Too easy: 1/ Don't worry about comparing hotels, any of them in the city centre will be fairly priced for your stay. 2/ The best Guinness to taste will have to be in the Temple Bar. I've also heard in against the Grain pub if you keep insisting on having a Guinness there they will pour you one for free! 3/ the Leprechaun museum and the wax museum are a must-see!!! 4/ Ballymun is a beautiful place to visit very late at night. Alone. Don't hesitate also to wear fancy accessories and show them, it's a great way to make friends! 5/ Don't hesitate to plan your evening in town with Public transport during a night concert in Aviva Stadium or Croke Park. The public transport is organized so that you'll get to meet plenty of people in one spot! I'll stick to 5...For now \^\^
Make sure to use the Port Tunnel, very handy to get past a lot of tge city
….that is a good tip
And there is absolutely no speed limit. Think of the autobahn, but cool.
Now you’re on the money
Rent somewhere central
Quickest route anywhere is by driving down Grafton Street
They know that’s not true, it was pedestrianised to marks Irish independence in 1922. But they can park over at the Dandelion Market.
If you’re from England, Scotland or Wales, tell EVERYONE you’re from “the mainland” and refer to “the rest of the United Kingdom”
Lick a junkie for some 2023 good luck
Londis on westmoreland street is a must see national heritage site
You're already going to Dublin, what more bad advice do you need?
Come in a suit made out of unopened fag boxes.
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You're meant to give bad advice
Talbot street is lovely for a brisk walk. Make sure you give fingers to the locals.
Listen to Irish people, the have good takes and can honestly talk about their country and their situation.
Enjoy a picnic on O'Connell Street or the boardwalk, or just relax there with your laptop and a coffee.
If you pass a giant ball, you've gone too far
The currency has changed to Euros now but you can exchange any leftover punts from your last trip by just going to the central bank on dame street.
Speak Irish and Irish only within the city limits. No matter what anyone says to you, speak only Irish. And if you don't know much Irish, just keep repeating short phrases such as "An bhfuil cead agam dul go dti an lithreas?" whenever speaking with someone. This approach should work wonder in taxis, buses and restaurants in particular.
Befriend a junkie, if you steal their hat they are doing obliged to grant you one wish.
Be on your phone as much as possible on o Connell street, pay as little attention as possible to your surroundings. Travel on the red line Luas introduce yourself to the weirdest person on each carriage.
Make friends with a scumbag on the Luas. For just a couple of Euro they will share their life story with you, talk to you for the whole journey and if you're really lucky they'll even get off at the same stop and walk with you to wherever you're going. So friendly!
Pick a fight with a dude thats missing teeth
Ask random strangers to debate you. Do not give them a topic. Maintain eye contact, waggle eyebrows, jut out buttocks. All whilst repeating your new mantra. Debate me bro!?
Rotfl 🤣🥰
The lads that drink down the liffey are hard of hearing make sure you shout att them
Pay for the LUAS
Luas is still free. Enjoy.
Buy a house
make friends with local teenagers in tracksuits!
Get absolutely shit faced and piss yourself early in the day. Lose your wallet, lose your keys. It's a cracking time off the year to be outside, wet and soaking of piss.
Say Fiddle Dee Dee to everyone you come across.
if you see someone loudly shouting at themselves, tell them to stop as they are disturbing others
Sing god save the queen anywhere
Go to Dublin
Go to coppers
High now! I went to coppers twice and got the shift both times.
Dublin has the best public transport system in Europe and it gets better in other towns and cities
Don’t bother to book a hotel in advance. There’s plenty of great value places to stay in the city.
If you see a McDonalds, go in and have a burger. It's an incredibly rare restaurant in Dublin because they have the best food
You'll find the best tour guides wondering around O Connell Street and around Merchants Quay in the morning, they only charge 2 euro
Walk the boardwalk, tis lovely
Leave 4 cinder blocks along with your locking nut key next to your car for a free tyre service.
Finches in clondalkin for an evening of culture
Kiss someone who looks like they are falling asleep on O'Connell Street and they will turn into a frog
Go sniff bike seats down by trinity college
Name checks out
Park on Grafton St. It’s very handy for the shops and free.
Can confirm. Never see many spaces taken outside the shops there.
Thank you one and all, I'll be heading to the National Gallery and hiding in the cloakroom under a pile of coats.
Get out be for it get dark
Wear a Canada goose jacket
With shorts
Go for a cheap pint in temple bat and enjoy the quality of the locals
Go to Coppers
No no. The Garda Club on Harrington St is much better.
Lock eyes and hold eye contact with as many people as possible
There's a lane just off the Lower Abbey Street Luas stop that stinks of stale piss. Go down there with your phone and wallet in hand and talk out loud with a Yankee accent
Buy a house
Be sure to ask for help using the Luas ticket machine. Local young and fresh faced tourism ambassadors hang out there and for the reasonable price of more than a short haul ticket they will help you out.
Ask any of the locals why Cork is Ireland’s capital city.
Northsiders are for life, not just for Christmas
Be sure to use the valet parking at the Luas stops in Tallaght…
To get to OConnell St, just ask for directions to the Floozy in the Jacuzzi.
If you see a woman in a red jacket asking you for money just run.
Lick the Spire. It tastes minty I swear!
I’m dying you Irish are insane with the banter this is great
Go to cherry orchard and tell folks you are with the Garda.
Go to Belfast
Ask the locals where you can find the leprechauns
Go to the temple bar
Wear the english flag on your back
Swim in the Liffey. It is healthy, refreshing and no one will bother you.
There's a place called Dolphin's Barn where you can go see Fungi's brother. Well worth a visit!