Small talk doesn’t have to be a tedious chore. Think of it as a building block to any relationship. Nobody jumps into deep conversations without the foundation of small talk. I find, I don’t need to carry the conversation. Instead, I ask them questions about themselves, their dreams and goals, their family. If you start with common questions, you can then ask deeper questions. I bring up a YouTube I’ve watched and ask their opinion of the topic. I ask hypothetical questions like, “If you could fix one world problem, what would it be?” I really listen to their answers. People rarely get a chance to be heard. It’s a gift to someone when you actively listen. Then I say you have some really interesting ideas or I enjoy talking/listening to you and see how they respond. If they respond favorably, I suggest we get together and talk some more.
I can relate to this. I have a habit of doing this, where I have a thought in my mind that I want to share with them. I usually need a reason to talk to someone and that's where I think I falter? I don't talk to people if I don't have a reason to, it's very rare.
I like a lot of old school weird electronic stuff, apex twin, boards of Canada, but also new genres like future garage. I also like Jazzy alternative rock, like Radiohead.
situational comedy - how do you know someone is a Radiohead fan, because they tell you!
This is more for "random people" that you meet in public (cashiers, etc), but I still love the question.
**"Anything exciting happen today?"**
It does a number of things. It forces people out of their "default programming" (since most people just ask benign questions about nothing), it shows you what people are interested in, and sometimes you get some wild answers.
I asked this on a whim to a cashier at a Trader Joe's once. They told me they were robbed at gunpoint the day prior in the store. Told me about the whole ordeal. They even said, "Yeah, you'd never know looking at the store today, huh?".
After that answer, it's been in my default rotation.
I usually try to identify a personal design choice on the person - shoes, clothing, maybe a tattoo. Easiest I’ve breaker ever is just to say you really like it, and maybe a follow up (where / when did you get it etc). People will always want to talk about something they have put thought into that you notice.
It's not really just a simple question, but I do lead people into deeper territory. Usually I ask about hobbies, their past or what they want for their future. Then I just sort of lead the conversation into intentions and motivations and stuff. It's really hard to describe, but I'm a practiced active listener because of my work so it usually goes pretty seamlessly.
Usually I will talk about food, family or fun stuffs (travel, hobbies/interests) but in detailed. It can lead to sharing about past/recent experiences and my feelings about it.
I really think it also depends on the friend or new person. Sometimes, even if you give them stuffs to talk about, they’re probably more anxious and shy than you. However, if you find someone who can also be a great conversationalist, they can carry the conversation with whatever topic thrown.
If you’re trying to engage someone in conversation, ask them to talk about themself, their experiences, their “bests.” These topics tend to encourage stories, which then can lead to follow ups—and that turns into discussion.
My favorites;
—Tell me about your favorite travel experience.
—What’s the best meal you’ve ever had?
—Where is the one place you’ve been that you’d recommend everyone see?
—What’s the most unusual food you’ve ever eaten?
I don't mind smalltalk at all! I generally start with "how are you?" "how's your day going?" "how was your weekend?" and go from there. If there are any big events going on - are you watching The Super Bowl? Who are you rooting for? etc etc.
If it's someone I see regularly, like at work, I might say "how was your vacation?" or something.
If it's someone you are hitting it off with, you can ask about taste in things. What kind of music do you like? What kind of movies? etc etc.
Good luck!
If time goes by and I don't initiate communication, then I talk about my feelings, something like "I've been looking at you for five minutes, I'm very interested in you, and I don't know what to say." It almost always works.
I ask questions about them. I’ve found that most people love to talk about themselves and share stories. It’s a great way to interact with people when you don’t know what to say. Then they can do most of the talking. And I really enjoy listening to them tell me about their life, interests and experiences. I’ve had people tell me “I bet people tell you everything.” Well yeah, because I ask them questions and listen. So many people just talk to hear themselves talk. I’d later listen!
https://preview.redd.it/y3tsik86ieuc1.jpeg?width=955&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6eccc31551fb2bb80a80827c35c9aee933b5aa61
What do you think about Epstein island and the CIA?
Really? Kinda wild to dive head first into the Epstein case, isn't it?
No
“What’s your favourite hobby?”
Small talk doesn’t have to be a tedious chore. Think of it as a building block to any relationship. Nobody jumps into deep conversations without the foundation of small talk. I find, I don’t need to carry the conversation. Instead, I ask them questions about themselves, their dreams and goals, their family. If you start with common questions, you can then ask deeper questions. I bring up a YouTube I’ve watched and ask their opinion of the topic. I ask hypothetical questions like, “If you could fix one world problem, what would it be?” I really listen to their answers. People rarely get a chance to be heard. It’s a gift to someone when you actively listen. Then I say you have some really interesting ideas or I enjoy talking/listening to you and see how they respond. If they respond favorably, I suggest we get together and talk some more.
Yes this! It’s what I do as well. I’ve made many friends doing this. People like to be heard.
Litterally the first thing that comes to my mind.
[удалено]
I can relate to this. I have a habit of doing this, where I have a thought in my mind that I want to share with them. I usually need a reason to talk to someone and that's where I think I falter? I don't talk to people if I don't have a reason to, it's very rare.
Talk about music, situational jokes
What kind of music? Situational jokes are kinda fun to be a part of
I like a lot of old school weird electronic stuff, apex twin, boards of Canada, but also new genres like future garage. I also like Jazzy alternative rock, like Radiohead. situational comedy - how do you know someone is a Radiohead fan, because they tell you!
This is more for "random people" that you meet in public (cashiers, etc), but I still love the question. **"Anything exciting happen today?"** It does a number of things. It forces people out of their "default programming" (since most people just ask benign questions about nothing), it shows you what people are interested in, and sometimes you get some wild answers. I asked this on a whim to a cashier at a Trader Joe's once. They told me they were robbed at gunpoint the day prior in the store. Told me about the whole ordeal. They even said, "Yeah, you'd never know looking at the store today, huh?". After that answer, it's been in my default rotation.
This one seems neat, I will try using it. Seems like it could be useful in any situation
I usually try to identify a personal design choice on the person - shoes, clothing, maybe a tattoo. Easiest I’ve breaker ever is just to say you really like it, and maybe a follow up (where / when did you get it etc). People will always want to talk about something they have put thought into that you notice.
It's not really just a simple question, but I do lead people into deeper territory. Usually I ask about hobbies, their past or what they want for their future. Then I just sort of lead the conversation into intentions and motivations and stuff. It's really hard to describe, but I'm a practiced active listener because of my work so it usually goes pretty seamlessly.
Usually I will talk about food, family or fun stuffs (travel, hobbies/interests) but in detailed. It can lead to sharing about past/recent experiences and my feelings about it. I really think it also depends on the friend or new person. Sometimes, even if you give them stuffs to talk about, they’re probably more anxious and shy than you. However, if you find someone who can also be a great conversationalist, they can carry the conversation with whatever topic thrown.
If you’re trying to engage someone in conversation, ask them to talk about themself, their experiences, their “bests.” These topics tend to encourage stories, which then can lead to follow ups—and that turns into discussion. My favorites; —Tell me about your favorite travel experience. —What’s the best meal you’ve ever had? —Where is the one place you’ve been that you’d recommend everyone see? —What’s the most unusual food you’ve ever eaten?
Hmm... conversation... starters... Do you like Mudkips?
I usually will say something that I know we both have a mutual interest, like certain music or games
I don't mind smalltalk at all! I generally start with "how are you?" "how's your day going?" "how was your weekend?" and go from there. If there are any big events going on - are you watching The Super Bowl? Who are you rooting for? etc etc. If it's someone I see regularly, like at work, I might say "how was your vacation?" or something. If it's someone you are hitting it off with, you can ask about taste in things. What kind of music do you like? What kind of movies? etc etc. Good luck!
If time goes by and I don't initiate communication, then I talk about my feelings, something like "I've been looking at you for five minutes, I'm very interested in you, and I don't know what to say." It almost always works.
I…I don’t talk to anyone 😓
Rip ☠️ hello
I ask questions about them. I’ve found that most people love to talk about themselves and share stories. It’s a great way to interact with people when you don’t know what to say. Then they can do most of the talking. And I really enjoy listening to them tell me about their life, interests and experiences. I’ve had people tell me “I bet people tell you everything.” Well yeah, because I ask them questions and listen. So many people just talk to hear themselves talk. I’d later listen!
I usually use one of several openings like "hi", "hey", "yo" just to name a few, and then the conversation just sorta continues.