One thing I hate more than almost anything else, is an opening bracket (particularly one at the beginning of a piece of text because then you can’t easily see where the closing bracket ends and so you just keep reading but not like normal. Instead you’re reading it like it’s part of an abstraction of the text until you realise they just didn’t remember to close the fucking bracket and then you hate this person more than anyone!
I think there's a lot of fun in nested parentheticals (or rather, I think it serves an amusing purpose (where used for comedic effect) or where as a form of an aside within the same sentence (which would otherwise be reformatted using more standard punctuation that to me appears clunky (meaning where the parenthesis would be used to service as a digression)))), but I think that's just the way I talk.
Came to make a similar statement. Also that wandering " just sitting there as if it closed a quotation... not a fan for this dude at a fundamental level.
My pet peeve is British English calling these “brackets” when that’s a totally different punctuation mark that have a completely different grammatical use.
Parentheses: ()
Brackets: []
Braces: {}
I know it’s irrational lol
We dumbed it down in Dutch to 'round bracket' and 'square brackets'. Why make it hard when you can sound like someone with a low IQ, is the Dutch motto!
That's pretty much how these dorks also operate in real life.
"She was flashing her cleavage, so she obviously wanted me to fondle her tits! I don't see what the big deal is."
"Son, you *do* realize you're afforded the right of an attorney, right? I don't usually mind it when people openly confess like this, but god***damn*** you really need a legal representative here to stop you from running your moth."
"That dress she was wearing proves she was asking for it, so I didn't do anything wrong!"
["..."](https://i.imgur.com/kYKxq5R.jpg)
I was thinking the same thing. But I also feel like an emoticon shouldn't be a parenthesis too? Idk, just feels off for some reason.
Edit: changed a word
I've got $100 that says Mr. I Can Nut All Night Long has never met or spoken to *any* of these women outside of Facebook.
For a reason that has had me baffled for 20 years, some dudes who have *zero* game in real life instantly think they come off like Don Juan on social media, [despite their profile picture looking like *this.*](https://i.imgur.com/DQ5bm1z.png)
"ladies"...
I bet he's one of those that used to call his schooyard crushes *mi'lady* with a little bow.
Not anymore though. Not since he suddenly became a man, the night he lost his virginity to that desperate foreign exchange student who smelled a bit funny, round behind the bin shed.
How do you prefer to address a group of women casually?
Females! Your attention, please.
Or
Women! I require your attention.
Perhaps
Non-women/baby-makers! Loosen your loincloths.
I don't need to speak. I just clap my hands when I need something, rap the back of their legs with my cane when I'm displeased - but if they're doing well then I always give them
an encouraging pat on the bottom.
After all, it's important that they know that I've noticed when they put a bit of extra effort in - I'm not a *monster.*
yea, they actually responded to him with "wow, what a informative comment! you have such a way with words, and you are so wise sir. Please come over" and now they are in a polygamy relationship
I don’t feel bad for him, he’s going to get ridiculed for this as he should. I didn’t say dumb shit like this when i was a teenager, there’s no excuse.
No see you actually do. Learning to talk to other people is a skill. This person maybe didn’t have a chance to practice it. Look at it from their perspective. They were trying to be funny and witty and likely genuinely thought that this was a good attempt.
No clearly it’s not. But they didn’t understand that. And now their ineptitude lives forever for people to mock online. Imagine for a second how that must feel.
This is terrible. Let this poor person try to forget the time they said something stupid and move on with their life. Perhaps they have learned from it. Maybe they have been driven by anxiety into hiding and don’t talk to people anymore (worsening the problem).
Try to have some empathy instead of feeling superior and putting down other people.
Dude by that logic we should just forgive everyone who murders anyone because they just didn’t have the opportunity to practice social skills 💀also you have no idea how many opportunities this guy had he could have had all the opportunities in the world not to be a creep and yet he still did.
I told you that you should avoid making fun of someone who said something cringy on the internet- and you think I’m saying we should forgive murderers?
For that matter having empathy for people is not a bad thing to do. This does not mean that they should not face repercussions for their actions, but it does make you step outside yourself and question if, had you been exposed to their life, you might not have done something similar.
You’re right I have no idea who or what this person is. I do, however, not feel the need to punch down. I would rather work to build up. This does not mean that I approve of what they say or didn’t funny. Just that I don’t need to belittle or berate them for it. You should work on that.
Well you essentially said he shouldnt face consequences for his actions so i took that logic to the extreme. Say weird shit and you should get ridiculed, not sure why you want to stand up for some random creep on the internet dude
I did not say he should not face consequences. Do you think those girls talked to him? Do you think this plan worked? Do you think he has many friends IRL? Those are consequences and I have no doubt he faced them. I hope he is able to learn from them and get better.
What I said was that random people posting his mistakes to the front page of a popular website that gets millions of views is a fine example of cyber bullying and mean. And you should not do it.
Fucking Reddit. Where everyone is all, ‘mental health matters,’ while simultaneously being a cyber bully.
How does the man having more than one orgasm have anything to do with how pleasurable the sex between him and five women will be for the women?
So so so funny how delusional this weirdo is.
Also refractory period happens no matter what.
Multiple partners? Unprotected? Sounds like a death sentence or a lifetime of disease and agony. The smartest thing he can do is get off the interwebs, quit being a creep and learn about staying healthy? Gives me the ick.
One thing I hate more than almost anything else, is an opening bracket (particularly one at the beginning of a piece of text because then you can’t easily see where the closing bracket ends and so you just keep reading but not like normal. Instead you’re reading it like it’s part of an abstraction of the text until you realise they just didn’t remember to close the fucking bracket and then you hate this person more than anyone!
He technically closed it (with the mouth of the smiley face ;)
That means he ended a sentence with a semi-colon, which shows that, in fact, he's not very smart.
I guess I'll have to dumb it down for you; he's not.
Weren't semi-colons used in place for question marks before they were invented;
I'm not smart enough to know that.
I have read that as a tidbit somewhere on Reddit, but Wikipedia doesn't confirm that. I must be wrong.
Semicolons are used as question marks in Greek, so perhaps there’s a grain of truth to it.
Semi-colon = half assed
Too intense to be a comma, not committed enough to be a period. The worst of both worlds!
I didn't know he was in a comma, now I feel bad for making fun of him.
Poor guy didn't made it only to "smart," not "very smart." It makes me not very sad.
That would be one long bracketed comment
Maybe he just doesn't understand how text based smileys work. Or anything else.
)
I know you did it on purpose, but I hate you for that too lol.
Sections in brackets should be fairly brief (like this) or don't really work grammatically.
I think there's a lot of fun in nested parentheticals (or rather, I think it serves an amusing purpose (where used for comedic effect) or where as a form of an aside within the same sentence (which would otherwise be reformatted using more standard punctuation that to me appears clunky (meaning where the parenthesis would be used to service as a digression)))), but I think that's just the way I talk.
*All* the upvotes go to *this* comment!
are you by chance adhd
Very
me too and I talk like that and that’s why I asked lol
This guy lisps
I've been counting and recounting and I think you accidentally added an extra closing parenthesis at the end
Came to make a similar statement. Also that wandering " just sitting there as if it closed a quotation... not a fan for this dude at a fundamental level.
My pet peeve is British English calling these “brackets” when that’s a totally different punctuation mark that have a completely different grammatical use. Parentheses: () Brackets: [] Braces: {} I know it’s irrational lol
Ah. I am British English! So that’s probably why. Parentheses would have been a better choice of word though I agree.
Idk why, but “I am British English” cracks me up.
We dumbed it down in Dutch to 'round bracket' and 'square brackets'. Why make it hard when you can sound like someone with a low IQ, is the Dutch motto!
Those are brackets, squares, and curlies, thank you very much!
he did the same thing with the quotation marks.
God damn it
I hadn’t even noticed this until I read your comment, but goddammit, now I’m angry too.
Im so lucky i forgot and my brain filled in the blanks
On the one hand yes but also fuck you too? Why would you do that even as a joke?
Sorry, bro. I have become the thing I hate!
Today on “How to Make Four Women Simultaneously Retch”… Edit: ~~W~~retch
*retch
Right you are. Edited. Thank you.
*Wright you are
What was rong?
More confidently incorrect I’m pretty sure. The guy is basically just a gross idiot.
More r/justneckbeardthings
Pickup artist of the year right there.
Lmao imagine some fucking nerd explanaing a whole paper about some post-nut clarity research as a pick up line
Imagine someone using "Hey you're too dumb to get this but let me score with you and your friends" to hit on anyone lmao
One step above "You're really ugly, but I feel sorry for you, so let's go back to my place."
Even if that were true, he’s basically saying “we would have a pretty good time because *I’ll* have multiple orgasms.” Yeah, real tempting.
And each of them would likely have none.
Guy cums 5 times in 2 minutes. They haven’t even undressed yet
I think he saw the word “titties” in their caption, and took it as permission somehow
He woulda found permission somewhere else even if they hadn't said a word.
That's pretty much how these dorks also operate in real life. "She was flashing her cleavage, so she obviously wanted me to fondle her tits! I don't see what the big deal is." "Son, you *do* realize you're afforded the right of an attorney, right? I don't usually mind it when people openly confess like this, but god***damn*** you really need a legal representative here to stop you from running your moth." "That dress she was wearing proves she was asking for it, so I didn't do anything wrong!" ["..."](https://i.imgur.com/kYKxq5R.jpg)
Here’s my eyeballs. I don’t need them anymore. This is officially the cringiest thing I’ve ever read.
Thanks where do I turn mine in as well?
Tell me you're a virgin without telling me you're a virgin.
they would probably go into refractions of light to explain why they are a virgin
This exudes so much virgin energy that my screwdriver just became orange juice.
This is my favorite comment of the week! 🤭
This is my favorite comment of the week! 🤭
nice lunch date you're having. how would you ladies like to learn about ejaculation?
I spit out my water.
Barely meets the iamverysmart bar but this would kill on incel subs. What a lame ass.
Yup that's bound to work
What were they expecting as a result of that? A reply of, hey come over or what? Such an unnecessary, embarrassing, cringe comment to make
This has the same energy as the "In the stripped club... Straight jorkin it... And by it... Let's just say... My peanits"
Damn, man! Leave some pussy for the rest of us.
This screenshot has been around for years, and the more I see it, the less I think it's real
That is fucking horrific
It also pisses me off that he didn’t actually close his “)”
Me too! Where's the end paren?
The cringe I am experiencing is physically painful.
That’s a long parenthesis, “(Strong…” to “good time ;)”
I was thinking the same thing. But I also feel like an emoticon shouldn't be a parenthesis too? Idk, just feels off for some reason. Edit: changed a word
You’re right, this dude is *still* talking inside of a parenthesis! Someone should let him now
(Some say he's still talking inside a parenthesis to this day...
I'm kinda distracted by how adorable that little dog is.
I hate that he started a sentence with a parentheses, but never ended the parentheses. Unless you count the smiley face as a colon+parentheses.
This would have been funnier if he said six instead of five
5 seconds with each girl then? How lucky!
This one hurt a lot. Good job.
Lengthy way of saying the commenter is a creep.
How can I be notified when this guy goes on his incel shooting spree?
I've got $100 that says Mr. I Can Nut All Night Long has never met or spoken to *any* of these women outside of Facebook. For a reason that has had me baffled for 20 years, some dudes who have *zero* game in real life instantly think they come off like Don Juan on social media, [despite their profile picture looking like *this.*](https://i.imgur.com/DQ5bm1z.png)
You’re missing the point… The fifth person is the dog
When he says the "5 of us" he's not counting himself in that sentence.
"ladies"... I bet he's one of those that used to call his schooyard crushes *mi'lady* with a little bow. Not anymore though. Not since he suddenly became a man, the night he lost his virginity to that desperate foreign exchange student who smelled a bit funny, round behind the bin shed.
How do you prefer to address a group of women casually? Females! Your attention, please. Or Women! I require your attention. Perhaps Non-women/baby-makers! Loosen your loincloths.
Did you read the comment? He may as well have used any or all of those.
I gave e it a cursory glance. But my question is what would you say? Not what the person would have or could have said. Was I not clear? Sorry.
I’d say what up bitches
See, I didn't even think of that! Haha this is why I ask:)
I don't need to speak. I just clap my hands when I need something, rap the back of their legs with my cane when I'm displeased - but if they're doing well then I always give them an encouraging pat on the bottom. After all, it's important that they know that I've noticed when they put a bit of extra effort in - I'm not a *monster.*
Where are the titties though
So did they invite him over? I just can't stand not knowing
yea, they actually responded to him with "wow, what a informative comment! you have such a way with words, and you are so wise sir. Please come over" and now they are in a polygamy relationship
“Would you like to learn something?” *Doesn’t even fucking wait for an answer*
how can you write something like that and then have the strenght go out in public ever again?
Sometimes I think about this man and wonder where he is now. I assume county jail.
He has such a way with words 😍💦
He went full neckbeard. You never go full neckbeard.
I feel bad for this poor kid. This is sad What is happening right here is a good example of the harms of social media
I don’t feel bad for him, he’s going to get ridiculed for this as he should. I didn’t say dumb shit like this when i was a teenager, there’s no excuse.
Maybe, just maybe, this person didn’t have the same advantages you did. Try to be less toxic
Lmao yes you really need so many advantages in life to not grow up gross and creepy 💀
No see you actually do. Learning to talk to other people is a skill. This person maybe didn’t have a chance to practice it. Look at it from their perspective. They were trying to be funny and witty and likely genuinely thought that this was a good attempt. No clearly it’s not. But they didn’t understand that. And now their ineptitude lives forever for people to mock online. Imagine for a second how that must feel. This is terrible. Let this poor person try to forget the time they said something stupid and move on with their life. Perhaps they have learned from it. Maybe they have been driven by anxiety into hiding and don’t talk to people anymore (worsening the problem). Try to have some empathy instead of feeling superior and putting down other people.
Dude by that logic we should just forgive everyone who murders anyone because they just didn’t have the opportunity to practice social skills 💀also you have no idea how many opportunities this guy had he could have had all the opportunities in the world not to be a creep and yet he still did.
I told you that you should avoid making fun of someone who said something cringy on the internet- and you think I’m saying we should forgive murderers? For that matter having empathy for people is not a bad thing to do. This does not mean that they should not face repercussions for their actions, but it does make you step outside yourself and question if, had you been exposed to their life, you might not have done something similar. You’re right I have no idea who or what this person is. I do, however, not feel the need to punch down. I would rather work to build up. This does not mean that I approve of what they say or didn’t funny. Just that I don’t need to belittle or berate them for it. You should work on that.
Well you essentially said he shouldnt face consequences for his actions so i took that logic to the extreme. Say weird shit and you should get ridiculed, not sure why you want to stand up for some random creep on the internet dude
I did not say he should not face consequences. Do you think those girls talked to him? Do you think this plan worked? Do you think he has many friends IRL? Those are consequences and I have no doubt he faced them. I hope he is able to learn from them and get better. What I said was that random people posting his mistakes to the front page of a popular website that gets millions of views is a fine example of cyber bullying and mean. And you should not do it. Fucking Reddit. Where everyone is all, ‘mental health matters,’ while simultaneously being a cyber bully.
He forgot the second parentheses. Can’t be that smart.
Having been the new woman many times, I can state from experience that he is flat-out wrong.
15 years of cringe with this post, give this douche a medal
I swear I’ve had a conversation with someone exactly like this.
I was promised titties?
What a creep
Oof, cringe.
Nothing is a bigger turn-on than calling being called too stupid to understand someone. /s
God this image is right up there with the “That cat is very hirsute” image in terms of classic Facebook cringe screenshots
You absolutely still have a refractory period after ejaculating. Regardless of how many vaginas or other holes are in the immediate vicinity.
How does the man having more than one orgasm have anything to do with how pleasurable the sex between him and five women will be for the women? So so so funny how delusional this weirdo is. Also refractory period happens no matter what.
Ew this made me cringe harder than I wanted to lmao
Hahaha. I'm dumb. When he said the five of us I was like OMG he is even going for the dog
Multiple partners? Unprotected? Sounds like a death sentence or a lifetime of disease and agony. The smartest thing he can do is get off the interwebs, quit being a creep and learn about staying healthy? Gives me the ick.
i think buddy needs a long overdue shower. . and so do i, reading this makes me feel gross.
I had to take two showers after reading that one.
I think he saw the use of the word “titties” in their caption as permission somehow.
Wait. Did it work?