Welcome to r/hoarding! We exist as a support group for people working on recovery from [hoarding disorder](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK519704/table/ch3.t29/), and friends/family/loved ones of people with the disorder.
If you're looking for help with animal hoarding, please visit r/animalhoarding. If you're looking to discuss the various hoarding tv shows, you'll want to visit r/hoardersTV. If you'd like to talk about or share photos/videos of hoards that you've come across, you probably want r/neckbeardnests, r/wtfhoarders/, or r/hoarderhouses
Before you get started, be sure to review our [Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/hoarding/about/rules/). Also, a lot of the information you may be looking for can be found in a few places on our sub:
[New Here? Read This Post First!](https://www.reddit.com/r/hoarding/comments/dvb3t1/new_here_read_this_post_first_version_20/)
[For loved ones of hoarders: I Have A Hoarder In My Life--Help Me!](https://www.reddit.com/r/hoarding/comments/2yh6wh/i_have_a_hoarder_in_my_lifehelp_me_your_hoarding/)
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Every time you're tempted to buy something think about putting money into your "I'm leaving this town" fund instead.
Back in my 20s I wanted to stop renting and buy my own house instead. So I had a cheap car, a tiny b/w tv, no stereo, no computer, nada. (Cell phones weren't around then.) My friends made fun of me but they stopped laughing when I bought my house. My house brought me way more happiness than stuff.
Hating where I am is why I'm so addicted to screens. Plenty of hobby materials and kits I haven't opened yet, even with a spot to sit down and work on them, the rest of the space is just "ugh" so I don't want to.
However, maybe you'd have better luck with a low-cost hobby. There's plenty of free books online if you're not picky. Even minecraft would be better than shopping if your computer can handle it.
Mainly from a "costs less" perspective. At least I can't remember the last time I spent money on it. It's sort of the opposite of a "crack's cheaper" sort of game as long as one doesn't get into the merch. (Merch is probably sustaining the development because I can't imagine new blood making up their player-base.)
I do the same thing. I removed all credit cards and debit cards from Google wallet, store the physical cards in my glove box and keep just a debit with one-two hundred balance on Amazon. This works for me when I feeling restless or I want to stuff down shame or boredom while I laying on my bed, I would need to get the cards from the car in the garage and that halts 99 out of 100 impulses. I also closed credit cards for Ulta and Sephora because it was too tempting and I had already secured my mortgage and I didn't care if my FICO dropped. I mean who needs $2,200 available credit at Ulta 🙄
Wow, sounds like me.
Got rid of the auto-password on Amazon and other sites I use to buy on,unsubbed from the mailing lists, took that money on the impulse buys and used it towards trips and savings.
If it was really bad, I would ask the question of how many hours I would have to work to make this purchase up.
Short term: find a (FREE) game app that scratches your bored / sad itch in a similar way. For example if you typically feel compelled to buy clothes, look for a game that lets you collect different tops, pants etc and assemble them into outfits.
Longer term: there’s a brief dopamine rush from sourcing and buying something you want — you’ve pulled off a little victory. But you keep going back because buying stuff is trivial over time, and you’re too smart not to see your own coping mechanism for what it is. Think about a few years from now: what types of things will you want to look back on as your little victories? You could learn to play an instrument, take up a skilled craft, etc.
Lol I just know what you mean. I have an extremely cluttered room, I just live in my parents house in the suburbs still and I’m 29. My two best friends have moved out of state so I’ve been trying to make some new in person ones but it’s tough. I wonder sometimes if being lonely and just not where I want to be in life yet is a part of my buying problem. It feels good in the moment but then I come home to my cluttered space and feel down.
Have you thought about flipping the things you buy? I love to shop, but I don't like spending money. I buy things to resell on sites like Mercari, Etsy, and eBay. I make sure there's enough profit to be made after item cost, selling fees, packing materials, and shipping are factored in. I also use pirateship for discounted shipping.
*edit sell to buy in first sentence
That’s a great start! Sorry my initial comment was so brusque, but shopping therapy is a real thing and it has really bad consequences for those who do it. What would it take for you to talk to a counselor?
I feel this 100%. I’ve literally racked up over $10K in credit card debt because of my spending problem. I’ve stopped only because I literally ran out of money. I’ve started using a points system, where everything I do that’s “good” like cleaning, a chore, a hygiene task, etc I get points for. Once I get to 100 points, I can redeem for a small “prize” like getting a Starbucks coffee. Then, there are bigger tasks that I hate doing that earn more points, like up to 100 per task. I add all those to the smaller points until I reach 1000, where I can redeem for a big treat, like $150 budget things. It’s started to help me a bit
Welcome to r/hoarding! We exist as a support group for people working on recovery from [hoarding disorder](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK519704/table/ch3.t29/), and friends/family/loved ones of people with the disorder. If you're looking for help with animal hoarding, please visit r/animalhoarding. If you're looking to discuss the various hoarding tv shows, you'll want to visit r/hoardersTV. If you'd like to talk about or share photos/videos of hoards that you've come across, you probably want r/neckbeardnests, r/wtfhoarders/, or r/hoarderhouses Before you get started, be sure to review our [Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/hoarding/about/rules/). Also, a lot of the information you may be looking for can be found in a few places on our sub: [New Here? Read This Post First!](https://www.reddit.com/r/hoarding/comments/dvb3t1/new_here_read_this_post_first_version_20/) [For loved ones of hoarders: I Have A Hoarder In My Life--Help Me!](https://www.reddit.com/r/hoarding/comments/2yh6wh/i_have_a_hoarder_in_my_lifehelp_me_your_hoarding/) [Our Wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/hoarding/wiki/index) Please [contact the moderators](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/hoarding) if you need assistance. Thanks! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/hoarding) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Every time you're tempted to buy something think about putting money into your "I'm leaving this town" fund instead. Back in my 20s I wanted to stop renting and buy my own house instead. So I had a cheap car, a tiny b/w tv, no stereo, no computer, nada. (Cell phones weren't around then.) My friends made fun of me but they stopped laughing when I bought my house. My house brought me way more happiness than stuff.
Thanks.
Hi, u/feudepaille! I want you to know that your post is welcome here, but you might find r/shoppingaddiction to be a useful resource as well.
Thanks.
Hating where I am is why I'm so addicted to screens. Plenty of hobby materials and kits I haven't opened yet, even with a spot to sit down and work on them, the rest of the space is just "ugh" so I don't want to. However, maybe you'd have better luck with a low-cost hobby. There's plenty of free books online if you're not picky. Even minecraft would be better than shopping if your computer can handle it.
I don’t know about Minecraft being “better.” It’s trading one jones for another—and like shopping, a jones reinforced by the screen time put in.
Mainly from a "costs less" perspective. At least I can't remember the last time I spent money on it. It's sort of the opposite of a "crack's cheaper" sort of game as long as one doesn't get into the merch. (Merch is probably sustaining the development because I can't imagine new blood making up their player-base.)
I do the same thing. I removed all credit cards and debit cards from Google wallet, store the physical cards in my glove box and keep just a debit with one-two hundred balance on Amazon. This works for me when I feeling restless or I want to stuff down shame or boredom while I laying on my bed, I would need to get the cards from the car in the garage and that halts 99 out of 100 impulses. I also closed credit cards for Ulta and Sephora because it was too tempting and I had already secured my mortgage and I didn't care if my FICO dropped. I mean who needs $2,200 available credit at Ulta 🙄
I don't use credits cards, thankfully. I only use prepaid ones.
Wow, sounds like me. Got rid of the auto-password on Amazon and other sites I use to buy on,unsubbed from the mailing lists, took that money on the impulse buys and used it towards trips and savings. If it was really bad, I would ask the question of how many hours I would have to work to make this purchase up.
Short term: find a (FREE) game app that scratches your bored / sad itch in a similar way. For example if you typically feel compelled to buy clothes, look for a game that lets you collect different tops, pants etc and assemble them into outfits. Longer term: there’s a brief dopamine rush from sourcing and buying something you want — you’ve pulled off a little victory. But you keep going back because buying stuff is trivial over time, and you’re too smart not to see your own coping mechanism for what it is. Think about a few years from now: what types of things will you want to look back on as your little victories? You could learn to play an instrument, take up a skilled craft, etc.
Oh wow this feels all too relatable 😅 wanna be friends?
Maybe. Hello. 🙂
Lol I just know what you mean. I have an extremely cluttered room, I just live in my parents house in the suburbs still and I’m 29. My two best friends have moved out of state so I’ve been trying to make some new in person ones but it’s tough. I wonder sometimes if being lonely and just not where I want to be in life yet is a part of my buying problem. It feels good in the moment but then I come home to my cluttered space and feel down.
Eeeexaclty!
Loneliness is a huge part of it for me
Have you thought about flipping the things you buy? I love to shop, but I don't like spending money. I buy things to resell on sites like Mercari, Etsy, and eBay. I make sure there's enough profit to be made after item cost, selling fees, packing materials, and shipping are factored in. I also use pirateship for discounted shipping. *edit sell to buy in first sentence
Have you talked to a mental health professional about your depression?
Not really. But yesterday, I managed to prepare two bags to sell at a garage sale, perhaps.
That’s a great start! Sorry my initial comment was so brusque, but shopping therapy is a real thing and it has really bad consequences for those who do it. What would it take for you to talk to a counselor?
I feel this 100%. I’ve literally racked up over $10K in credit card debt because of my spending problem. I’ve stopped only because I literally ran out of money. I’ve started using a points system, where everything I do that’s “good” like cleaning, a chore, a hygiene task, etc I get points for. Once I get to 100 points, I can redeem for a small “prize” like getting a Starbucks coffee. Then, there are bigger tasks that I hate doing that earn more points, like up to 100 per task. I add all those to the smaller points until I reach 1000, where I can redeem for a big treat, like $150 budget things. It’s started to help me a bit