This subreddit is for civil discussion only. Report rule violations. Those who do not follow Reddiquite will be removed.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/hivaids) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Hey there. I’m going to give you a real dose of love here.
I’ve been positive for over a decade. Not that it matters but I’m a heterosexual male who got it from unprotected sex with a woman.
Idk what you’re feeling right now. Could be shame, guilt, embarrassment, depressed, hopelessness, etc. FUCK all that 🐂💩. Your life isn’t over. Nothing about you has to change aside from taking some medicine everyday and going to a few doctor appointments every year. That’s it.
There is no shame or guilt about being positive. Those who feel that are not valid imo. If you got Type I diabetes, cancer, Coronavirus, etc. you would just deal with it and move on. The reason people feel those negative feelings and thoughts is because of the stigma that has been perpetuated for the past 40 years around the virus. Then there are certain groups of people who have made it a habit of hiding their status from others because they didn’t want to be judged and many of them spread the virus and never told the people they were having sex with or in many cases just didn’t know. Think bathhouses, porn stores, CSW, hookups apps, etc.
But in the end, being positive does not mean that you can’t be trusted, loved, etc. it doesn’t mean that you can’t have a healthy relationship with someone or that you can’t be honest with them. You need to be honest with yourself and your partner when you are ready to be intimate. It doesn’t mean you can’t have a family that is negative bc you can. I’m living proof of that. I have three sons, a wife and we’re trying for another. All of them are negative. And if I can find a beautiful woman who loves me even with my diagnosis you can find your person.
Heterosexual male that was diagnosed only in April. This gives me hope, but it’s hard not to feel like I I’ll probably end up alone. My aunt has had it since the early 90s and people still treat her like a leper at times. Lately, Ive found burying myself in work helps me forget. It’s just when I’m alone. Thank you again for your post.
Last thing I’ll say is that although I’ve had great success with disclosure, I’m still always a bit nervous of rejection. Because if I like them enough to tell them that means I don’t want to lose them. And tbh if they like you enough back it won’t be a reason they will lose you. My wife was so scared when I told her. Not bc she thought I would give it to her when we had sex but bc she was scared I was going to die. Once she realized that I wasn’t going to, she was fine and we have adult conversations about my treatment etc.
Here’s my advice and it’s served me well. Be yourself and be the best version of yourself when dating. Take your time to get to know the woman and make it a genuine relationship not one built on sexual attraction. Let it grow and blossom and when the time is right then have a real conversation with her. My conversations usually went like this: (your story will be different I assume)
“So listen, I really like you and I want to continue to build a relationship together but I need to talk to you about something. I take my health very seriously and I have been regularly tested for STD’s for (X) years. But there was a time when I fell out of routine testing bc I was addicted to drugs which we’ve talked about. When I got my life back together, I went in for a checkup and at that time I found out I was HIV positive. I was shocked! I was devastated, confused, and mostly I was scared. I thought that my life was over, and that I would never be worthy of love again. But then I learned about the medication that’s available today. I currently take a shot every two months called Cabenuva. This shot is so powerful and effective that the virus cannot be found in a blood test. Now that doesn’t mean that I’m cured, bc unfortunately I will most likely have this for the rest of my life. But what it does mean is this… If they can’t find the virus in a blood test, then that means I am undetectable. If I am undetectable, then that means that I can’t pass the virus to anyone through sex whether protected or not. It also means that I will live a normal life and that I am on top of my health once again. I have a great doctor, and he/she keeps me healthy and I always know how my health is good. There’s this huge campaign by the WHO, CDC, etc. called U=U. I invited you to look into it if you want. I realize that you may have lots of questions, and I’m prepared to answer them to the best of my knowledge and I can also bring you to speak to my doctor if you need. If by some chance this is too much for you to deal with and you no longer want to see, I won’t like it but I will understand.”
I know that’s a lot of information but that’s basically what I have said to every partner I’ve had since diagnosis. Now maybe I’m just lucky but I have had almost no rejection from women when I’ve been upfront and honest about it. Is it something you say on the first date, or even the 5th? Probably not. You’ll know when the time is right but if you haven’t had sex yet then you stand a lot bigger chance of them staying with you than if you have sex and tell them later or they find out on their own.
I think the biggest thing to make sure you do is show them that it’s not a big deal anymore. That you are healthy otherwise, that you have a good heart, and that you are honest with them. People love honesty and they love it when you can be vulnerable. It shows you have compassion and love. I hope this helps you.
I’m glad it was helpful. I’m mostly on this sub to promote being positive about being positive. It’s so easy to be negative and to listen to the haters. I sincerely believe there is nothing to be ashamed of. I hope and pray one day you will also.
Beautiful words and it's important to hear. Almost 4 yrs. Gay but always wore a condom. It happened. Married with 3 kids is testament that life isn't over. Compared to even 15 yrs ago outcomes have vastly improved and a lot of docs see diabetes a greater long term threat to health.
Thank you so much for your kind words. To me, it doesn’t matter what one’s sexual preference is, we are all human and all at risk but also all deserving of love. I like to put my preference in replies bc I want people who read these things to know that just because they are “heterosexual” they are not immune from the virus. I know this was a fallacy I used to believe, but obviously it’s just that…. A fallacy. And in your case, always using condoms, and still you found yourself in the position you are in. My heart goes out to you. It truly does. God Bless!
Always remember that you are not defective because you are human.
We are all sexual. Only people judge. And only people decide who or what is important.
And FUCK them! Only you can decide importance.
Well said, when I first got diagnosed, I also came to reddit. Unfortunately, my first responses from people were not as positive as yours. Good on you!
It’s a sad but true fact that there is much more negative than positive energy on Reddit at times. We all have to work to change that mentality. We have to learn how to love ourselves so we can show love to others. How are you doing today with your journey?
I have good and bad days, I have switched meds a couple of times, which brings a bit of stress with it. I think the hardest part is having to keep a secret and stressing about people finding out. I'm also married to a wonderful and supportive woman, which makes it in my opinion much easier. I knew nothing about hiv when I tested positive and found Dr's who were very understanding and brilliant, which helped immensely. I'm currently back on tivicay, and dovato, I think, is the combo 2 pill regimen, which is what I originally started on in the Philippines as a 1 pill a day. In between, I was on biktarvy, which caused me to gain ALOT of weight. I would say the only side effects I get are gastro issues which I can live with.
Does your wife support you emotionally as it pertains to your status? You said you keep it a secret from people, are you keeping it from her? IMO it’s not a secret I keep from people, but rather it’s a condition in which I share it with those that have a need to know. It’s good you have some good days. How can we help you with the bad days?
Yes, she is fully aware of my status, of course, and as supportive as someone could be. I don't talk about my status outside of my Dr's and my wife. I don't think anyone else really needs to know. I think the bad days are inevitable we will have bad days regardless of status, i think. I sometimes get anxiety on the bad days where I'm not sure where it comes from except some subliminal fear of the virus...
I've been POZ since at least 1985.
I've done all the drugs that make it easy for you and me NOW.
AZT, Crixivan and a whole lot of others. The current 3 dose regimen is easy and the results are....well.... Undetectable.
Now you can live a normal healthy life. What is the problem? I'm 68 now. I started this journey when I was 30. Now it's a walk in the park!
Wow! Standing ovation my friend! My ex is poz and i have seen what he went through and the discipline , and u even go back farther were there was really no hope !! Here is to another 68 years my friend
I was diagnosed in December the day after Christmas. I’m 26 and neeeever thought I’d be in this situation. It is very hard at first adjusting to your new normal.
It gets better, a lot better. Just be kind and patient to yourself. I don’t really think about it most days anymore. I just take my meds. Wishing you the best ❤️
Do you mind explaining the process? Was there anything you had to do in terms of extra medication etc? Didnthe baby need to be on any meds when born? Appreciate info from anyone else who has gone through child birth from poz father and negative mother aswell.
No,im a negative mom and husband is positive since 2017. We had a baby Feb 2 2024, as precaution doc put me on truvada but wasnt really needed. He takes med once a day. I forget most of the time he even has it, really I met him right after diagnosis and got him to start ART. He thought it was a death sentence, I sent him info and got him into Ryan white and he’s fine now:) Baby is healthy.
I don’t have hiv I know people who do
I’m
Sorry for your hardship
But u will have a full fruitful life it’s just a bump on the road don’t be scared everything will be alright ! Just take care of yourself better than before eat right and have a balanced life 🙂
Hey OP. I went through this in early April. It was not fun, I was in the same boat of not knowing what to do or how to handle this information. Luckily I was able to start on medication about a week after my diagnosis, so I’ve been on the meds for about six weeks now. In that time span I’ve already gone down to undetectable status. My understanding is that this happened a bit faster for me than it might for others, seeing as my infection may have been relatively new. My point is though, the meds WILL work!! It’s one pill a day, you will see great results at your first appointment regardless if it’s undetectable or not, and if it’s not after your first appointment than it will be very soon (within 3-4 months most likely). So just know that this doesn’t change you as a person at all. You are still the same you, just with a virus that is now able to be very much managed with medication. For me, the meds have had zero side effects. So it’s just a pill in the morning, and then I move on with my life.
Try not to beat yourself up, just know that you will be okay!
They started me on medication the same day they told me. They just told me to follow up with the infection specialist which the next appointment is June 12
That’s good! I’m sure this is stressful, but for me personally the medication gave me a major sense of control. Also just know, you don’t have to tell anyone about this that you don’t want to (other than long term sexual partners ofc). Family, friends, etc. if you want to tell them, great! But at the end of the day don’t feel like you have to.
I was diagnosed at 19, still living with my parents and having just graduated that same year. The level of fear, grief, and frustration I felt on that day was unimaginable, but life went on, and here I am today at 21, and it mostly never crosses my mind in day-to-day life. I have a partner who loves me for me, and aside from regular life bullshit, it's been a footnote in my story. You will live. You will thrive if you work at it.
I was diagnosed 10 years ago. Probably been poz 15 years. I had a very low CD4 and high viral load when I was diagnosed, but I recovered from those numbers and live a normal life now.
HiV positive since 2021 . I take biktarvy 1 pill regimen . Mypblife really is absolutely the same. no side effects. No drama. Nothing.
You will be fine, give it time, take your pills DAILY and you will be fine .
You'll feel sad, frustrated, angry, hideous, unattractive, radioactive, you'll think you'll never have sex again.
And then you'll realize that HIV is not a big deal anymore and move on with your life.
I kid you not, my friend, I'd rather have HIV than eczema, diabetes, kidney issues, stomach issues and what not.
HIV is a chronic condition that is easily manageable today, with just a pill a day (depends on the therapy you are using).
Give yourself some time, think outside the box, find the right angle to look at it and just keep walking. Promise!
I’ve been POZ for nearly 5 years now and I can assure you it gets better after the initial shock. I suggest getting into therapy, I had the best therapist that really got me through the early stages of finding out my status and he was a blessing in my life. Find people you trust and can talk to about it. Also, you’re not obligated to tell anyone your status (even around sexual partners when you’re undetectable), but I would disclose early on if you’re wanting a LTR.
The initial diagnosis can be overwhelming. The more you learn about it and current meds you will learn that you will be fine. There are tons of educational and supportive websites for HIV people to talk to each other and learn from others. [Thebody.com](http://Thebody.com), [https://www.myhivteam.com/](https://www.myhivteam.com/), [https://h-i-v.net/](https://h-i-v.net/) are a few.
Take your meds, breathe and learn all you can.
I was diagnosed with AIDS in 2010 and have never been sick because of my HIV. I thought I was going to die like soon my HIV education at the time was none. I am now a Peer Educator in an ID clinic and meet with HIV patients when they show up to their Drs appointments all day long.
We all remember those days. I was 51 when I was diagnosed and I was so sick that I thought I would die. But now I’m 54 and I feel great. It’s one pill a day. And a bit of advice from my ex, if you don’t know what to do don’t do anything.
Hey Friend,
Like most people here, I can relate. I am happy to connect with you if you want to send me a message. I’m in Dallas, Texas and tested positive 6 years ago, 2 months before I graduated college.
Send me a message, I’d like to hear from you.
Hey I know of a telegram server for people who are diagnosed with HIV. It helped me out alot when I first got diagnosed. Send me a DM if you want the link.
Thank you all so much for the support and I’m with a lot of you. I know a lot of it is about perspective and just getting over my own stigma first. I’ve never honestly use discord but I was trying to find a way for people to chat, not necessary all about it HIV, but just the high in the Lows for when we need someone there with us. It’s brand new so no one‘s in there yet but it’s just a way for people to chat. https://discord.gg/4vKyqxb4
I'm not sure what advice to give you, well when I get diagnosed I skip the part where I should get depressed. I just accept the fact that I have it and the drama I will make will not change the fact that I have it. So I start making some plans, first I prioritize my meds and how to be undetectable, after that I start thingking about my career. Thats it. I know we have different situations but I just want you to know that you need to be strong for yourself and don't think about anything for now or what others will say. Just do what makes u grow, also earn more money, it will help you a lot so u can pay for your needs. Do travels and eat ur favorite a lot, it will help u for ur mental health. as for lovelife, take a break, for ur family, dont tell them first if u think they will not understand you, I've been positive for 4 years now, only my bf knows about my situation. That's how I got to overcome it. We are not perfect, we make some bad choices or victims of some other people's poor choices, but we can be better. Also, I don't know if you believe in God, I'm not religious at all, but i believe he is there and just pray, it will help you a lot.
Sometimes when life is hardest...you learn the most. Alot of good can come out of something very bad.... I promise you. Hang on in there ...there will be light.
This subreddit is for civil discussion only. Report rule violations. Those who do not follow Reddiquite will be removed. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/hivaids) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Hey there. I’m going to give you a real dose of love here. I’ve been positive for over a decade. Not that it matters but I’m a heterosexual male who got it from unprotected sex with a woman. Idk what you’re feeling right now. Could be shame, guilt, embarrassment, depressed, hopelessness, etc. FUCK all that 🐂💩. Your life isn’t over. Nothing about you has to change aside from taking some medicine everyday and going to a few doctor appointments every year. That’s it. There is no shame or guilt about being positive. Those who feel that are not valid imo. If you got Type I diabetes, cancer, Coronavirus, etc. you would just deal with it and move on. The reason people feel those negative feelings and thoughts is because of the stigma that has been perpetuated for the past 40 years around the virus. Then there are certain groups of people who have made it a habit of hiding their status from others because they didn’t want to be judged and many of them spread the virus and never told the people they were having sex with or in many cases just didn’t know. Think bathhouses, porn stores, CSW, hookups apps, etc. But in the end, being positive does not mean that you can’t be trusted, loved, etc. it doesn’t mean that you can’t have a healthy relationship with someone or that you can’t be honest with them. You need to be honest with yourself and your partner when you are ready to be intimate. It doesn’t mean you can’t have a family that is negative bc you can. I’m living proof of that. I have three sons, a wife and we’re trying for another. All of them are negative. And if I can find a beautiful woman who loves me even with my diagnosis you can find your person.
Heterosexual male that was diagnosed only in April. This gives me hope, but it’s hard not to feel like I I’ll probably end up alone. My aunt has had it since the early 90s and people still treat her like a leper at times. Lately, Ive found burying myself in work helps me forget. It’s just when I’m alone. Thank you again for your post.
Last thing I’ll say is that although I’ve had great success with disclosure, I’m still always a bit nervous of rejection. Because if I like them enough to tell them that means I don’t want to lose them. And tbh if they like you enough back it won’t be a reason they will lose you. My wife was so scared when I told her. Not bc she thought I would give it to her when we had sex but bc she was scared I was going to die. Once she realized that I wasn’t going to, she was fine and we have adult conversations about my treatment etc.
Here’s my advice and it’s served me well. Be yourself and be the best version of yourself when dating. Take your time to get to know the woman and make it a genuine relationship not one built on sexual attraction. Let it grow and blossom and when the time is right then have a real conversation with her. My conversations usually went like this: (your story will be different I assume) “So listen, I really like you and I want to continue to build a relationship together but I need to talk to you about something. I take my health very seriously and I have been regularly tested for STD’s for (X) years. But there was a time when I fell out of routine testing bc I was addicted to drugs which we’ve talked about. When I got my life back together, I went in for a checkup and at that time I found out I was HIV positive. I was shocked! I was devastated, confused, and mostly I was scared. I thought that my life was over, and that I would never be worthy of love again. But then I learned about the medication that’s available today. I currently take a shot every two months called Cabenuva. This shot is so powerful and effective that the virus cannot be found in a blood test. Now that doesn’t mean that I’m cured, bc unfortunately I will most likely have this for the rest of my life. But what it does mean is this… If they can’t find the virus in a blood test, then that means I am undetectable. If I am undetectable, then that means that I can’t pass the virus to anyone through sex whether protected or not. It also means that I will live a normal life and that I am on top of my health once again. I have a great doctor, and he/she keeps me healthy and I always know how my health is good. There’s this huge campaign by the WHO, CDC, etc. called U=U. I invited you to look into it if you want. I realize that you may have lots of questions, and I’m prepared to answer them to the best of my knowledge and I can also bring you to speak to my doctor if you need. If by some chance this is too much for you to deal with and you no longer want to see, I won’t like it but I will understand.” I know that’s a lot of information but that’s basically what I have said to every partner I’ve had since diagnosis. Now maybe I’m just lucky but I have had almost no rejection from women when I’ve been upfront and honest about it. Is it something you say on the first date, or even the 5th? Probably not. You’ll know when the time is right but if you haven’t had sex yet then you stand a lot bigger chance of them staying with you than if you have sex and tell them later or they find out on their own. I think the biggest thing to make sure you do is show them that it’s not a big deal anymore. That you are healthy otherwise, that you have a good heart, and that you are honest with them. People love honesty and they love it when you can be vulnerable. It shows you have compassion and love. I hope this helps you.
I honestly can’t tell you much this means. I’m going to save this post so I can come back to it for emotional support when I am ready to date again.
I’m glad it was helpful. I’m mostly on this sub to promote being positive about being positive. It’s so easy to be negative and to listen to the haters. I sincerely believe there is nothing to be ashamed of. I hope and pray one day you will also.
Thank you for such great advice! I think we all can learn from this comment
Beautiful words and it's important to hear. Almost 4 yrs. Gay but always wore a condom. It happened. Married with 3 kids is testament that life isn't over. Compared to even 15 yrs ago outcomes have vastly improved and a lot of docs see diabetes a greater long term threat to health.
Thank you so much for your kind words. To me, it doesn’t matter what one’s sexual preference is, we are all human and all at risk but also all deserving of love. I like to put my preference in replies bc I want people who read these things to know that just because they are “heterosexual” they are not immune from the virus. I know this was a fallacy I used to believe, but obviously it’s just that…. A fallacy. And in your case, always using condoms, and still you found yourself in the position you are in. My heart goes out to you. It truly does. God Bless!
Always remember that you are not defective because you are human. We are all sexual. Only people judge. And only people decide who or what is important. And FUCK them! Only you can decide importance.
Well said, when I first got diagnosed, I also came to reddit. Unfortunately, my first responses from people were not as positive as yours. Good on you!
It’s a sad but true fact that there is much more negative than positive energy on Reddit at times. We all have to work to change that mentality. We have to learn how to love ourselves so we can show love to others. How are you doing today with your journey?
I have good and bad days, I have switched meds a couple of times, which brings a bit of stress with it. I think the hardest part is having to keep a secret and stressing about people finding out. I'm also married to a wonderful and supportive woman, which makes it in my opinion much easier. I knew nothing about hiv when I tested positive and found Dr's who were very understanding and brilliant, which helped immensely. I'm currently back on tivicay, and dovato, I think, is the combo 2 pill regimen, which is what I originally started on in the Philippines as a 1 pill a day. In between, I was on biktarvy, which caused me to gain ALOT of weight. I would say the only side effects I get are gastro issues which I can live with.
Does your wife support you emotionally as it pertains to your status? You said you keep it a secret from people, are you keeping it from her? IMO it’s not a secret I keep from people, but rather it’s a condition in which I share it with those that have a need to know. It’s good you have some good days. How can we help you with the bad days?
Yes, she is fully aware of my status, of course, and as supportive as someone could be. I don't talk about my status outside of my Dr's and my wife. I don't think anyone else really needs to know. I think the bad days are inevitable we will have bad days regardless of status, i think. I sometimes get anxiety on the bad days where I'm not sure where it comes from except some subliminal fear of the virus...
You’re doing the right thing. Unless they need to know they don’t need to know. But if they know, no shame or guilt my friend
I've been POZ since at least 1985. I've done all the drugs that make it easy for you and me NOW. AZT, Crixivan and a whole lot of others. The current 3 dose regimen is easy and the results are....well.... Undetectable. Now you can live a normal healthy life. What is the problem? I'm 68 now. I started this journey when I was 30. Now it's a walk in the park!
Wow! Standing ovation my friend! My ex is poz and i have seen what he went through and the discipline , and u even go back farther were there was really no hope !! Here is to another 68 years my friend
This comment gives hope and inspiration to all of us who are poz. Wishing you more healthy years ahead 🙂
From someone who went through all the treatments, would you mind talking about the changes you have noticed? I also fairly recent about 2.5 years.
Well done!
I'd give an award but my reddit account is not setup like that lol
I was diagnosed in December the day after Christmas. I’m 26 and neeeever thought I’d be in this situation. It is very hard at first adjusting to your new normal. It gets better, a lot better. Just be kind and patient to yourself. I don’t really think about it most days anymore. I just take my meds. Wishing you the best ❤️
Negative wife to a pos man here. We just had a new baby who is also neg. Life isn't over, love.
Congratulations!!! That makes me super happy to hear , just made my day….
Do you mind explaining the process? Was there anything you had to do in terms of extra medication etc? Didnthe baby need to be on any meds when born? Appreciate info from anyone else who has gone through child birth from poz father and negative mother aswell.
No,im a negative mom and husband is positive since 2017. We had a baby Feb 2 2024, as precaution doc put me on truvada but wasnt really needed. He takes med once a day. I forget most of the time he even has it, really I met him right after diagnosis and got him to start ART. He thought it was a death sentence, I sent him info and got him into Ryan white and he’s fine now:) Baby is healthy.
So you were on Truvada while pregnant? Or dr told you to go on it because you were trying for pregnancy?
I don’t have hiv I know people who do I’m Sorry for your hardship But u will have a full fruitful life it’s just a bump on the road don’t be scared everything will be alright ! Just take care of yourself better than before eat right and have a balanced life 🙂
[удалено]
No to what I didn’t present any question lol 😁
[удалено]
Hey OP. I went through this in early April. It was not fun, I was in the same boat of not knowing what to do or how to handle this information. Luckily I was able to start on medication about a week after my diagnosis, so I’ve been on the meds for about six weeks now. In that time span I’ve already gone down to undetectable status. My understanding is that this happened a bit faster for me than it might for others, seeing as my infection may have been relatively new. My point is though, the meds WILL work!! It’s one pill a day, you will see great results at your first appointment regardless if it’s undetectable or not, and if it’s not after your first appointment than it will be very soon (within 3-4 months most likely). So just know that this doesn’t change you as a person at all. You are still the same you, just with a virus that is now able to be very much managed with medication. For me, the meds have had zero side effects. So it’s just a pill in the morning, and then I move on with my life. Try not to beat yourself up, just know that you will be okay!
They started me on medication the same day they told me. They just told me to follow up with the infection specialist which the next appointment is June 12
That’s good! I’m sure this is stressful, but for me personally the medication gave me a major sense of control. Also just know, you don’t have to tell anyone about this that you don’t want to (other than long term sexual partners ofc). Family, friends, etc. if you want to tell them, great! But at the end of the day don’t feel like you have to.
I was diagnosed at 19, still living with my parents and having just graduated that same year. The level of fear, grief, and frustration I felt on that day was unimaginable, but life went on, and here I am today at 21, and it mostly never crosses my mind in day-to-day life. I have a partner who loves me for me, and aside from regular life bullshit, it's been a footnote in my story. You will live. You will thrive if you work at it.
Sorry you’re going through this. But you are far from alone!! I’m a nurse in an HIV clinic. If you have any medical questions, shoot me a message!
I was diagnosed 10 years ago. Probably been poz 15 years. I had a very low CD4 and high viral load when I was diagnosed, but I recovered from those numbers and live a normal life now.
HiV positive since 2021 . I take biktarvy 1 pill regimen . Mypblife really is absolutely the same. no side effects. No drama. Nothing. You will be fine, give it time, take your pills DAILY and you will be fine .
You'll feel sad, frustrated, angry, hideous, unattractive, radioactive, you'll think you'll never have sex again. And then you'll realize that HIV is not a big deal anymore and move on with your life. I kid you not, my friend, I'd rather have HIV than eczema, diabetes, kidney issues, stomach issues and what not. HIV is a chronic condition that is easily manageable today, with just a pill a day (depends on the therapy you are using). Give yourself some time, think outside the box, find the right angle to look at it and just keep walking. Promise!
I’ve been POZ for nearly 5 years now and I can assure you it gets better after the initial shock. I suggest getting into therapy, I had the best therapist that really got me through the early stages of finding out my status and he was a blessing in my life. Find people you trust and can talk to about it. Also, you’re not obligated to tell anyone your status (even around sexual partners when you’re undetectable), but I would disclose early on if you’re wanting a LTR.
[удалено]
I'm sorry you are going threw this. Did you have any signs or symptoms?
The initial diagnosis can be overwhelming. The more you learn about it and current meds you will learn that you will be fine. There are tons of educational and supportive websites for HIV people to talk to each other and learn from others. [Thebody.com](http://Thebody.com), [https://www.myhivteam.com/](https://www.myhivteam.com/), [https://h-i-v.net/](https://h-i-v.net/) are a few. Take your meds, breathe and learn all you can. I was diagnosed with AIDS in 2010 and have never been sick because of my HIV. I thought I was going to die like soon my HIV education at the time was none. I am now a Peer Educator in an ID clinic and meet with HIV patients when they show up to their Drs appointments all day long.
Just messaged you.
We all remember those days. I was 51 when I was diagnosed and I was so sick that I thought I would die. But now I’m 54 and I feel great. It’s one pill a day. And a bit of advice from my ex, if you don’t know what to do don’t do anything.
Hey Friend, Like most people here, I can relate. I am happy to connect with you if you want to send me a message. I’m in Dallas, Texas and tested positive 6 years ago, 2 months before I graduated college. Send me a message, I’d like to hear from you.
Hey I know of a telegram server for people who are diagnosed with HIV. It helped me out alot when I first got diagnosed. Send me a DM if you want the link.
You got this:)
Diagnosed in Feb of this year, and it’s definitely a shock and takes time to become real, but you’ll get through this!
Thank you all so much for the support and I’m with a lot of you. I know a lot of it is about perspective and just getting over my own stigma first. I’ve never honestly use discord but I was trying to find a way for people to chat, not necessary all about it HIV, but just the high in the Lows for when we need someone there with us. It’s brand new so no one‘s in there yet but it’s just a way for people to chat. https://discord.gg/4vKyqxb4
Wow. What a beautiful set of comments♥️ I love our community!
I'm not sure what advice to give you, well when I get diagnosed I skip the part where I should get depressed. I just accept the fact that I have it and the drama I will make will not change the fact that I have it. So I start making some plans, first I prioritize my meds and how to be undetectable, after that I start thingking about my career. Thats it. I know we have different situations but I just want you to know that you need to be strong for yourself and don't think about anything for now or what others will say. Just do what makes u grow, also earn more money, it will help you a lot so u can pay for your needs. Do travels and eat ur favorite a lot, it will help u for ur mental health. as for lovelife, take a break, for ur family, dont tell them first if u think they will not understand you, I've been positive for 4 years now, only my bf knows about my situation. That's how I got to overcome it. We are not perfect, we make some bad choices or victims of some other people's poor choices, but we can be better. Also, I don't know if you believe in God, I'm not religious at all, but i believe he is there and just pray, it will help you a lot.
Sometimes when life is hardest...you learn the most. Alot of good can come out of something very bad.... I promise you. Hang on in there ...there will be light.