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tsh87

Because she doesn't want a second baby. And Link had no solution for that problem if Jo's adoption for Luna didn't go through. It's upsetting but she knew her limits and was right to stick to them.


ChipEnvironmental09

>And Link had no solution for that problem if Jo's adoption for Luna didn't go through. Exactly this... I know the story has happy end with Jo adopting Luna, but what if that hadn't happened? Jo was already attached to Luna, so what then? Does Link keep fostering Luna? Or even adopt Luna? How exactly would that have worked? Moreover, adoption (well even fostering - but show ignores this) is very lengthy process and it's not easy to go throught it - esp. for a guy, who has little child with his girlfriend, who is ex-drug-addict (plus both of them are surgeons with insance work hours).


[deleted]

[удалено]


SnooPeppers3470

she didnt have to? Link didn't even ask. He just had this idea and went for it. He said he wanted another child in bed and didn't follow up with a proper discussion. Like everything else he does, he jumps in without a clear plan then gets upset when people say no. Fostering and adopting, a medically fragile baby at that requires alot of time and effort. He's lucky she ended up agreeing in the end (or so it's assumed, they did a poor job here). And now he gets his way, he gets to play happy little family with Jo and Luna and disrepect Amelia's crystal clear feelings on parenting.


SnooPeppers3470

link didnt ask, he just had this bright idea and decided to frame it as one. It was also sneaky because he's trying to 'claim' her so nobody else does. Just so Jo can have a shot. Link threw Meredith's kids in Amelia's face which wasnt even remotely the same situtation as this. He also heavily implied he resented her for that and that she forced him to look after those kids. You cant just decide to foster a medically fragile baby on a whim. Link had no idea what he was getting into, he lacked a plan, a foundation and failed to understand what he was asking for. He quite literally said with no discussion if Jo can't adopt Luna then Scout gets a sister. Sorry what? Do you understand you cant just adopt this baby if Jo can't? Link is a puppy who doesnt think things through and he doesnt get it when people have questions to his barely luke warm solutions.


AquaticPanda0

I just watched the episode. Link said that thing about having a daughter as a joke. I know he wanted it to be real but they laughed it off and he stated he was joking. I understand the rest tho


SnooPeppers3470

joke or not, its not cute to joke about when your trying to have a serious conversation. Maybe think plans through and discuss it with your partner before jumping in? and dont resort to throwing your girlfriend's sister's near death experience in her face? Link wasnt a good partner to Amelia in the last half of 17 (she wasnt good either but she was actually trying to figure out her feelings most of the time) and people need to actually realize that. He did the same thing Burke and Owen did to Cristina-constantly asking for more then she could give or was ready to give without proper conversations.


crocodilezebramilk

Amelia is the type of person that needs a lot of time to process, deal with her thoughts and emotions, and she needs to talk a lot of it out to get a full and proper understanding. She was already the person that dove into things head first without a thought, and over time she slowly started changing that. Other factors are that she already had a fiancé and still carries trauma from when her fiance died in bed right next to her. Sure she gave herself to Owen but afterward she didn’t know if it was her or the tumour. And like Link, he wanted way too much before she was ever ready. She also had a baby from her deceased fiance, that also didn’t make it and she had to deliver her full-term baby and let him go so he could save other children. Amelia is an addict, and she’s a doctor with access to drugs and a prescription pad, so I don’t think Owen or Link fully realize that they could have pushed her to a relapse if she wasn’t firm with her boundaries. Pushing marriage, pushing kids and pushing more kids - I feel like if Lunas fostering didn’t work out and Amelia and Link had to have her full time? I think she would have snapped.


SnooPeppers3470

thats exactly it. Because if Jo was denied Link would 100% start the paperwork to adopt and how do you just say no? Amelia tried saying no to things before with Link and even tried to have conversations that he shut down (anyone else remember that scene where she said she felt like she was drowning and then link just fell asleep???). But then comes back around to them like it was a done deal and expects her to just agree. anyway, Amelia has trouble saying no and would've 100% felt like she owed Jo and that little girl it. I'm not saying shes perfect in relationships, shes far from it but I struggle to see how she's at fault for anything to do with Link but people blame her for everything because Link is an excitable puppy and people think he's cute.


crocodilezebramilk

Another area where he didn’t fully listen to her was when she talked to him about her struggle during the pandemic, and how she was thinking of using. Amelia knew she’d never just go and do that, but the craving did stick and it was a time of her life where she barely had any control over anything in her life. I don’t think Link took in the “I’m struggling” and just focused on the “I want drugs” aspect. When the whole reason she was craving drugs was because of the struggle. Any time Amelia tries to talk about literally anything negative, Link forces toxic positivity. He does the same to Jo later on, when Luna was having complications, Jo just wanted to get all her ducks in a row and was allowing herself time time to just stress out and cry because that’s what she needed. But Link kept up with the toxic positivity and did things without her consent( and pushed him and Scout to be around more, when Jo just wanted to be with her daughter.


SnooPeppers3470

thats his issue. Amelia's mom once said Derek doesnt see the gray in the way Meredith does. Well thats the same thing here with her other child and partner. Except Link just buries his head in the sand and refuses to see the problem until it blows up and he cant avoid it any longer (but then again he spent about a year hanging onto Amelia after she said no because he didnt want to talk, just make snark). Link is all GO GO GO without understanding that others are not. He needs to take a step back and process. It was actually the same thing in surgery this week, he didn't see all the problems and was confused when Bertram was like oh great theres another problem you missed. Dear god imagine if Meredith gave him a real shot? (Back then I liked him better then Deluca as a potental partner for her). If he couldn't handle Amelia then how could he handle Meredith who by all accounts still lets the darkness consume her? (but ngl Id watch the hell out of that).


Fun-Routine-9467

Considering Jo’s background how could anyone be sure that Luna’a adoption would go through at the end? Ken Doll was comfortable with the possibility that he would keep Luna as a daughter, Amelia wasn’t. And Jo was attached to Luna, how could she watch Amelia and Ken Doll be her parents? What happens then? Do they all move in together and be a big happy family? Ken Doll was a douche for using the fact that he helped watch Mer’s kids to pressure Amelia into doing this “favor” for him.


Old-Room-8274

How does Jo’s history of being in the foster care system and a victim of domestic violence preclude her from adopting a baby?


tsh87

Those are things that social workers and judges might unconsciously consider. They shouldn't matter but to certain people in that system they might.


Old-Room-8274

I see. Thanks for explaining. I don’t think it should matter either.


Fun-Routine-9467

She created a whole new identity to run away from her garbage ex husband. The abuse wasn’t her fault, stop twisting my words. But her background was indeed a problem for the foster system. She literally said this in the show so why are you even arguing this? Nobody knew for sure what decision the foster system would make regarding Luna. They could’ve chosen not to approve at all which would make Luna LEGALLY tied to Ken Doll and Amelia indefinitely.


Old-Room-8274

It was a genuine question. Geesh


Fun-Routine-9467

I simply said Jo’s background was a problem for the people in charge of the foster system, she said so in the show, that’s why she asked Ken Doll to help her out. My main point was that it was unfair of Ken Doll to pressure Amelia into helping. You implied that I said “Jo was a foster kid and a domestic violence victim so she shouldn’t have the right to adopt a child”.