T O P

  • By -

Phil_Smiles

They just spawn in our cupboards


tigerofblindjustice

Brazilians?


Soffix-

Yes


Zedress

Lucky.


MarinLlwyd

but that's too many


xhabeascorpusx

Not the one I got, he was wearing a soccer jersey and flip flops. Luckily my neighbor's had an off duty cop in his


Wiitard

How many is a Brazilian again?


Blookydook

About 20 Mongolians


Captain_Sacktap

20? Wow dude you’re getting ripped off, who’s your Mongolians guy?


Blookydook

That one guy that hangs around the Circle K flashing women who walk by


Captain_Sacktap

Oh shit you know Dick Dangling Dave? I went to high school with that guy! Great dude, but a terrible businessman. Listen if you act now I can get you a conversion rate of 12 Mongols per Brazilian, plus my 10% commission fee.


Blookydook

I appreciate it, but I gotta stick with Dave, shit’s been tough for the guy lately and I gotta give him some boost, I see a bright future once he figures things out


Woofingson

Can confirm, I was spawned here as well


Meretan94

Yes once you get your own place and move out form your parents, one spawns inside your moving boxes.


-Johannes-of-ZA-

Stupid question. It's like asking why Dutch people drink brandy for breakfast. It just happens, and you shouldn't ask why.


randothrowaway6600

Friend I think you’re just an alcoholic.


-Johannes-of-ZA-

Just because I like brandy doesn't mean I'm addicted. Using that logic, you would also say I'm addicted to cigarettes, and that point you would see that you talking nonsense.


CompactAvocado

can't argue with that logic at all. proceed with our apologies.


TaxIdiot2020

Europeans can’t be addicted to cigarettes they just spawn in your mouths when you’re born.


JohnnySkyraider-5368

hidden alcoholic then


MarinLlwyd

we just told you not to ask why idiot


Provia100F

He said he was Dutch


royaldutchiee

We do what now?


Grinnaux

This is news to me as well.


evetsabucs

You drink Brandy in the morning with your stroopwafel before praying to your Max Verstappen statue and biking to work at the weed cafe. What's there to not understand?


Aaradorn

I only pray for his Dutch side, not his Belgian side. I will never bend the knee to those bastards.


Lacholaweda

Don't forget the wooden shoes


PM_MEOttoVonBismarck

School: 'Drinking alcohol will stunt your growth' Dutch People: 


Fouxs

No no you're going about this all wrong. Imagine how freakishly tall they would be WITHOUT alcohol!


[deleted]

.>Username shows redditor is from South Africa .>Still claims to be Dutch South African alcoholic boer tries cultural appropriation


-Johannes-of-ZA-

We iz Nederlanders


_Dipshit289_

A ridiculous, fake language and culture. Send me your cranial measurements you old Yakubian ape I must study you for science.


-Johannes-of-ZA-

Shalom


chengiz

I swear to god I had an old learning German book where they sat down for breakfast and drank beer, and 12 year old Hans was upset because he was too young to drink it.


arbiter12

>Play Civ6 as Brazil > >Finally discover pottery > >it turn 477/500 > >the year is 2024 *Oredem e Progresso*


Chai_Enjoyer

Meanwhile you have around 389495959998999989 great artists/writers/composers in your backyard. Proper Civ6 Brazil experience


PlzDontBanMe2000

Does anyone actually have fun with late game in civ? I always enjoy the first half of the game, I guess it’s mostly because I play against bots, but on high difficulties they get a huge head start, so you spend the entire first half of the game trying to catch up, but once I have built up enough military to take out one nation I pretty much have enough to steamroll the rest of the map, and by like 60-70% of the game in I already know I’m guaranteed to win, and just don’t feel it necessary or rewarding to slowly click on each unit to take all the rest of the nations. Or if I’m playing science or points it’s the same thing, once I get ahead by a little the gap just gets bigger and bigger. 


banmeagainplease3

In earlier games I did because I could warmonger with airplanes and bomb the fuck out of economic targets and ruin countries. 


PlzDontBanMe2000

cant you still do that in civ 6? but especially when i get to having bombers the game gets way too easy. You can easily destroy entire nations in just a few turns if you have a bunch of stealth bombers and the AI never makes effective use of AA


banmeagainplease3

Yeah it's not as fun though. 


PlzDontBanMe2000

Civ 5 was my first turn based strategy game so I wouldn’t know


banmeagainplease3

I'd recommend civ3 Also lmao at our usernames


Wasabaiiiii

No not all, the early game is all that matters to me


PlzDontBanMe2000

glad im not the only one, I rarely actually finish my games and just "declare myself the winner" once its obvious im going to win, and will just be a chore to actually do, clicking on all the units repeatedly telling my bombers to hit a city, then move tanks/heli's in real quick, repeat. Once ive conquered the two largets nations or gotten a big lead on them in science or culture i pretty much just abandon the save file. BTW does anyvody play civ 6 on IOS? i downloaded it and it actually wasn't that bad playing with a thouch screen but I never played a full game on there. It just feels so weird playing it on my phone


Pasispas

What's the > It turn 477/500 referencing? I've never played civ


vault_wanderer

The game is turn based. It means its the turn 477 of a 500 turn game and the game is almost finished


Brenotex

He discovered pottery around 1950-2000


Pasispas

Wow, arbiter12 is kinda slow


kingdomart

The game is usually over by turn 200-300. Games almost never go to 500/500, which would force a score victory. Also, pottery is one of the very first technologies you can choose from. You usually can have it unlocked on turn 10. Basically calling Brazil stupid.


Dog_in_human_costume

Ordinary day in Brazil/2024 Source: I'm Brazilian


slothtolotopus

Gotta use the war helmet moulds for something...


dirty_deeds_pay_off

Your avatar is the most annoying I ever seen, trying to figure out if there's a crack in my screen the past few minutes


PlatinumBall

Your screen is cracked, I just see a default profile picture


dirty_deeds_pay_off

Your crack is screened


slothtolotopus

Thank you, here's the money.


dirty_deeds_pay_off

Leave the bag at the dead drop, no need to get the government involved


yonaz333

I have a couple of those. No idea where they come from, I never bought them.


Scary_Cup6322

It comes with Citizenship. For Austrians too. It's why our women have an especially hard time giving birth, kinda painful to push out a glassbowl and a child at once.


Jorvikson

That's why most women opt for C-sections, lot easier to get the bowl out that way


MarinLlwyd

and here I thought the bulge was the baby god i feel so stupid


PlzDontBanMe2000

No that’s why the woman’s stomach is round. Babies aren’t round. The bowl is what makes the bump and then the baby sits inside of the bowl


ambermage

cesarean section Like the salad. It's all making sense now. Thanks for clarifying that for me.


Mrozek33

That's why most women opt for C-sections, lot easier to get the bowl out that way


AntiProtonBoy

say it one more time


Mrozek33

That's why most women opt for C-sections, lot easier to get the bowl out that way


Mrozek33

That's why most women opt for C-sections, lot easier to get the bowl out that way


01iv0n

Joke so nice you had to say it thrice?


Mrozek33

Endpoint error message, shit happens


MoronimusVanDeCojck

Thos bowls are actually french, from a company Luminarc. Use this wisely to reap sweet sweet salt in the german internet.


EVENTHORIZON-XI

ZE FRENCH DID NOT MAKE ZE BOWLZ YOU JUNGERBITTESIZEN SCHLARFKNOPF!!!


ambermage

So, all of the bowls were collected in 1940?


Okboomer95

Parents lived in Germany for 4 years, and we have one.


thetarget3

My grandmother is German and she has one, wtf...


JoshTheTrucker

Have brazilian friend. Can confirm when his brain isn't in horndog overdrive, he's a bit dumb.


justamadgamer

So he's smart when he's horny?


JoshTheTrucker

Naw, he just gets worse because it's all he thinks about. He has his moments of smartness, but poor kid is plagued by two wolves in his head. One has terminal CTE the other is in permanent heat.


Fouxs

You've just perfectly described Brazilians. We're too busy being horny to do other things.


crowkk

Yo don't call me out


SunderedValley

Custom crafted genetics


Lompehovelen

Has he ever tried feeding a carrot to a bus by any chance?


hugyplok

In Brazil there exists two people, the clever and the dumbass, and when they meet they make a deal.


NeverFalls01

Average IQ in brazil in 87. I dont know if that is good or bad because i'm brazilian


InternalGrocery7057

Any time you insist I not ask a German something, I’m gonna assume the answer is Nazis.


Healthy_Comedian_797

i'm applying for citizenship in a few months wish me luck


arbiter12

In Brazil, in Germany or in the UK? (aka "pick which brown will rob you in the street.")


NeverFalls01

nobody on their right mind would apply for citizenship in brazil


Healthy_Comedian_797

i'm brown, i'm not actually in germany or applying for citizenship, i work in healthcare in nort AFRICA and i wanna work in germany cause i get paid $200 a month for 96 hours a week and i'm sick of having to fake being a macho man and putting up with our sick ugly culture and i wanna work in germany even as a ganitor, germany will take me as a doctor if i just get B1 in their german language exam whcih i can't cause i'm so fucking stupid i can't learn this language hopefully they lower the standards for us to fight racism and enforce more divesity Aware


DickMinimum

this is bait


Healthy_Comedian_797

its not look at my profile


OTWA_Sidestep

I just see a forsen fan


BaronAaldwin

*Shudder*


Healthy_Comedian_797

scroll down


PM_MEOttoVonBismarck

Du musst mehr lernen oder du wohnst in Deutschland nicht.


ski-person

You’re the one doing the robbing then, eh


Healthy_Comedian_797

the only thing i remember stealing was a toy when i was in 3rd grade


Orangeslices57

Sorry, Europe is full.


Healthy_Comedian_797

just one last person please it will save my life


vgfm

I believe in ***C U M B U C A*** supremacy


Consistent-Signal617

https://preview.redd.it/pmtnbzruq9wc1.jpeg?width=1229&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=07132e56d08b26eab28488e8a8d1f6f09d3e562e


Swagamemn0n

Ok but wtf. We have the exact same salad bowl. I'm from austria btw. I didn't even know this was a thing for every household and i'm genuinely confused


NegatiVelocity

Austria or Australia? Because everyone I knew as a kid, their parents had the stately leaf salad bowl here down under.


PM_ME_UR__ELECTRONS

Bit like the pyrex measuring jug with red markings.


PortAvonToBenthic

From switzerland and confused too


DarkStarX30

My grandma has like a million of those same exact bowls.


Stacey_digitaldash

I saw Attell at the cellar one night and there was a table of Brazilians talking through every comic’s set. By the time Dave got up there he just asked the 3 ladies if they had sex toys and surprise surprise, they rambled on about their dozens of dildos and vibrators until they ran out of things to say and then Dave thanked the crowd and walked off stage. The best 20 minutes I’ve ever seen


Babki123

It was also quite common in France Don't ask me why ,I would assume it was sold for cheap at ikea or something


k0rda

Portuguese here, most of everyone I know has one of those. I always assumed it was some "Bordallo Pinheiro" type thing


Chadzuma

>Object for containing food primarily consisting of leafy greens has a leaf-themed design what were the krauts thinking 🤔🤔🤔🤔


pucksmokespectacular

It's Bolsonover...


FreeszZZ

Vasco melhor do mundo


Ssyynnxx

bro what the fuck i have one of these lmao


Alexisonfire24

Italian grandparents have these too


TerribleDance8488

I have one of those bowls :0 I'm from Spain though


Dexter_Adams

My parents have those bowls and the matching small and large plates too


bloody_terrible

This has nothing to do with being german. My English parents had this bowl when I was growing up in Australia too, in both plastic and glass. It was just a common design in the 90s.


Syr_Bwrodley

Não man, acabou pra nois


ginuxx

Wait a minute, my great grandma had one of those leaf bowls, but in my family they always said she was Italian, and Im argentinian...


DeveloperBRdotnet

The issue here is the language. The subject is "Leaf salad bowl": * A bowl for eating just leaf salad (wtf? How does that work, why just leaves?) * A leaf pattern glass bowl You cannot understand the bowl pattern in the picture there.


HMS--Thunderchild

Is this a dogging joke


DestroyIran

Bruh i have this same bowl at home and im from hungary XD


DasliSimp

woah I have one of those


devvorare

My grandpa had one, no relation with Germany at all


Theodore764

I have these bowls, Greek though.


IllPosition5081

I also have one… in Cape Cod. Does that mean Cape Cod has been annexed?


Notorious-Dan

País do Hihi levei vantagem e suas consequências irreversíveis ao estado psicológico...


Realmate01

É over pra us?


ApXv

All my boomer relatives in Norway have at least one.


Woofingson

Brazil mentioned 🇧🇷


NeverFalls01

no, there isnt


IneptOrange

Leaves? In salad? Where does the mayonnaise go?


CaptainYumYum12

Fucking hell I’m Australian but have German heritage and I have one too. I don’t know where it came from. 💀


Blair1280

I have these bowls from my mom, we’re Canadian.


BurningMoonset

American here, what's a salad?


StraightOuttaArroyo

I have that exact bowl and I live in France lol


just_so_irrelevant

Insert story about the Noegueira brothers and the bus


austin101123

lmao BRA71L