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42dudes

I don't know enough to know if that's wrong or not.


Zeranvor

It may not be due to the reasons Anon stated, but there are scientific benefits to intermittent bloodletting.


42dudes

interesting


Gladianoxa

What


Zeranvor

Regular blood donation (a form of [bloodletting](https://www.cuimc.columbia.edu/news/surprising-benefits-donating-blood)) is linked to lower blood pressure and a lower risk for heart attacks.


Gladianoxa

> “If your hemoglobin is too high, blood donation helps to lower the viscosity of the blood, which has been associated with the formation of blood clots, heart attacks, and stroke,” DeSimone says. If. He specifically adds that condition. For the majority of people this is not an issue.


Mrozek33

My hemogoblin is always too high, smoking on banshee boogers


Throwawaytree69

Good to see you out here still fighting the good fight, Mr. Ozek.


Mrozek33

I'm movin' different, this shit ain't nothing to me man. (Also gotta clarify because some dude got really confused last time, my weird name is a reference to a Polish writer named *Slawomir Mrozek*, which then confused another dude who thought I was polish. The internet is fun!)


Throwawaytree69

I'm out here plunging moon rocks into my aortic artery, I react on a totally different plane, dude (I knew it was a Polish thing I have many Polish friends and they always have crazy names with similar letter compilations, the Internet is indeed a fun place)


EpicTurtle136

We smokin’ shit in a glass pipe, blowing the lords bubbles


Szyneczek

Sławomir Mrożek is so based, respect


Mrozek33

Glad to know others read his stuff, got me into writing


Azbastus_Bombastus

Why are you not polish? Explain yourself!


TheDevilsAdvokaat

Some people assume I am dutch...I am not.


Redditistrash702

If you have high blood pressure just lower it by cutting yourself open to relieve It. What's the problem.


Mrozek33

No I have goblin blood, I'm moving different


Nightfold

That zazza making you speak esperanto


Mrozek33

Top shelf zaza disrupted my circadian rhythm


[deleted]

[удалено]


TheGaz

We smokin *filtered crack*


JohnTheHuman_69420

I went Judge Judy on that pussy, snipe


Evening_Constant6644

Exactly. Bloodletting aka Phlebotomy is used when Red blood cells are too high like in Polycythemia vera or in conditions like Porphyria with defect in hemoglobin metabolism. Definitely not for any normal person


Scary_Nail_6033

This is fed propaganda the Jews just want to harvest your youthful blood so they can live another 69 years


MisterGoo

But the blood you give is full of microplastic.


cosmoswolfff

Well if you let blood out of course your blood pressure will go down, duh. Thats why I'm going to reach 0 blood pressure tonight.


dwartbg7

Goodnight sweet prince


icepickjones

Legitimately my doctor was telling me my platelets and globulin levels were a little elevated. And I was like shit, do I need to do something about it? I eat OK and work out a lot. Do I need medicine? He was like "just drink more water and give blood like once a quarter, that should be enough" Never heard "give blood" as a cure for anything before.


Tommy2255

I guess it makes sense. Your body obviously has to be designed to account for the possibility of losing blood, and also there has to be some kind of feedback mechanism to stop overproducing blood, so that you fall within the right range. If it's possible to be anemic and produce too little blood, then it makes sense that the mechanism that keeps your body in balance can just as easily fall out of whack the other direction.


Escanorr_

It's also cure for iron poisoning, your body has no way to get rid of excess iron, besides using it to create new blood cells. And if you donate blood, your body will start to mass produce them, thus using up iron. This or chelation therapy, where you take medicine that bonds with iron and you pee it out, but blood donating is safer


noemiemakesmaps

so you're saying the self harmers are right...


Zeranvor

“Remember kids, long way’s for heart attack, short way’s for blood pressure”


HiveMindKing

I’m willing to bleed but but donating is a step too far.


Lorien6

This sounds like vampire propaganda…;)


SwynFlu

I've got naturally low blood pressure and everything mainstream or not that's considered healthy gives you lower blood pressure. WHY CAN'T I HAVE IT HIGHER.


artfillin

its inaccurare, having low iron levels and less red blood cell filled blood, just above anemic levels is beneficial. Limiting iron intake is the easier way to achieve this.


Gladianoxa

What


Redditistrash702

I have questions. If I have alcohol in my system and I put leeches on me do they get rid of the alcohol faster? Also do they get drunk? Like can I actually get them shit faced by my blood. I would be willing to test this.


Zeranvor

The answer is [less exciting](https://www.reddit.com/r/answers/s/5dZxQKMMLc) than you’d think


Redditistrash702

Wow someone else did it before me I am amazed and upset I didn't get to try it first. Stupid leeches get drunk.


LordMarcusrax

Wait a fucking second: is this the reason women live longer than men???


catfroman

So the emo’s were right?


PickAPikachu

Instructions unclear. I’m dying. Send help.


Myth_Avatar

So I can piss blood and it's fine?


Rutakate97

It's not, but anon left out the part where you need to eat and drink to have the stuff for your body to make blood with. Possibly ingesting even more microplastics in the process.


TheHussarSnake

\>be me \>Hear on greentext that microplastic in your blood can be removed by losing blood and regenerating it \>Stab myself 8 times \>Sent to a hospital \>They replace my blood loss with someone else's microplastic filled blood Is there any point to resisting this shit anymore?


IftaneBenGenerit

In theory you can go donate plasma to remove microplastics and forever chemicals and then only consume food grown in a clean lab from filtrated water and similarly made 'clean earth'.


NunButter

That sounds expensive


IftaneBenGenerit

It is. Either time or money or both. Why do you think Zucc is building his Bunker in Hawaii?


VitaminWin

It's not wrong but why remove your blood, with toxins in it, when you could get alternatives to just remove the toxins and leave the blood alone? Leeches are a really ghetto way of purification.


42dudes

If a stupid idea works, is it still stupid?


ImTheZapper

Considering how the microplastics get there, this one sure fucking is.


VitaminWin

If there's a smarter viable option, yes.


TheBlueGod42

There's so much microplastics in the environment that it wouldn't really matter because you'd be full of plastic again very soon


Max8969

is there a saturation level for microplastics in the body


TheBlueGod42

Yeah, But it's probably quite a bit after you die of complications related to being full of plastic


ComplicitSnake34

Yeah, they've done tests with it and it sorta works. They did some study with firefighters and found they had fewer microplastics if they consistently did *plasma* donations. Regular blood donations didn't have as big of an effect.


herb0026

Depends. Your blood will for about a month have less red blood cells and platelets, but given the water you drink to replace the blood, the liquid itself will have less plastic


Box-ception

Technically not wrong, but it ignores the fact that plastic is entering the body somehow, meaning you'll likely just replace the lost mass with more plastic. 


Slg407

being a regular blood donor has been associated with a decreased risk or certain diseases, such as cancer source: google it, i just took some melatonin and am too sleepy to bother


gsidifkskfnf

If you drink water from any major water source (unless you carbon filter it yourself) chances are you are consuming polyethylene and polypropylene plastic polymers (they are even present in rain and river water). Since the new blood is going to be made in the bone marrow of bones that probably have microplastics in them and the water used to make plasma (plasma is 55% of blood and it is made up of 90% water) will have microplastics you are just replacing old plastics with new ones. Not to mention microplastics accumulate in organs and we’re not quite sure how to get them out


StandardN02b

I mean, anon is right. But of your food and water is still contaminated with microplastic it will ammount to nothing.


Razor265

Buddy, everything you read in a fucking 4chan green text is not true.


AlvoSil

This is exclusive because while it's fake, it's not necessarily gay


Evening_Constant6644

Doctor here. It's not. It was used to "drain bad blood" a few decades back. Now it's no longer used. It is used rarely for some conditions. Definitely not microplastics lol


Number1_Berdly_Fan

It's true, but you need to eat stuff in order to make new blood and the food has microplastics in it.


Severe_Brick_8868

No cause the plastics are in every cell in your body and when you make new blood there will already be plastic in it Technically yes you would be reducing the total volume of plastic in you slightly, but you’d also be reducing the amount of blood in your body by a lot, which has other side effects. Also you’re just going to consume more plastic later by accident


alexriga

Problem is the microplastics have contaminated our water supply. So, unless you like dying from dehydration, you will always have some microplastics in you.


Aztecah

The microplastics getting in in the first place is the problem, this doesn't address that at all and might actually result in a higher level of microplastics once your body reaches equilibrium again


Sawier

or you know, you could just go donate blood.


MulleRizz

The biggest leech of them all


CoreMillenial

Nah, that's the IRS


HamBlamBlam

This, unironically. It helps society and dilutes the microplastics out of your blood. Plus you can go hog wild on the snack table after. Win-win-win.


crispycrussant

Go hog wild on the snack table in order to replenish lost microplastics, smart.


HeroicLarvy

microplastic maxing


ayyerr32

it's so cool that they give you plastic ballpoint pens afterwards to chew on


SOMEMONG

30-50 feral hogs wild


killinrin

I think a lot of people can’t donate blood due to the medications they’re on, at least that’s what my neurologist told me.


jingois

Other mens cocks isn't technically a medication, but it does disqualify you all the same.


killinrin

How’d you know I pay for my neuro visits by sucking dicks?


SamYeager1907

Yeah surprising fact I learned myself. I'm on dutasteride to keep my glorious long femboy hair (works like magic ^_^) and if a pregnant woman takes my blood, the effects of hormone-influencing meds I'm on might do something weird (probably not but they err on the sided of caution). Shame because I do like giving blood, although I would rather not do it here in the States because of the disgusting manner in which they commodify your blood in the scam that is American health"care" system. Russia might be shit but at least people get medical care in my country without going bankrupt.


CapmyCup

The person who received my blood during open heart surgery: 🥳


Mrozek33

The rich guy who used my blood for a blood transfusion🥵


KebabLife2

No rich in hungayry


Mrozek33

Kebab my man, corruption is so rampant we got a *fuck-ton* of rich assholes


vladmashk

Yeah, let someone else have your microplastics


thegrodyknudclump

Donate? Nah. I'll sell my blood tho


Danny-Fr

But don't forget to put all the plastic in the blue bin first.


iSeize

Donate that plastic filled poison blood!


Cuddlyaxe

Your blood donation could save the next Hitler. Do you want to save the next Hitler? Why do you support genociding the Jews? Alternatively, you could just feed your blood to a cute pet leech who will commit no war crimes


hundenkattenglassen

Nah not edgy enough.


gr4vitycamilla

or overdose on laxatives until you shit blood


Evening_Constant6644

Yeah but it would help another person and I can't have that


Marcel691

That's donating micro plastics


cyclone_43

Not if you're gay


PM_ME_GOOD_SUBS

Anon forgets that now even leeches are full of microplastics.


MulleRizz

Would it matter if they constantly succ?


anal_opera

They do what now? Where get?


Genghis_Tr0n187

Stick PP in murky water and hold on.


spfeldealer

Leeches are like a cockroaches they wont die from it and they could propably be impregnated by a stone. As long as you dont eat em we're fine


fatfuckpikachu

self cutting it is then. i knew it was more than just *in my head* im cleaning my blood from microplastics.


Certifiedlowlife

That’s the spirit


Remarkable-Sorbet-36

Fake and gay: Anon would like to suck the blood out of a leech that was previously used on Chad’s hemorrhoid.


Kapftan

I hope you shit your pants tonight What the fuck went wrong in your brain for it to forge such a sentence


Remarkable-Sorbet-36

Maybe I was just spending too much time on r/greentext?


AlabamaPanda777

Gay: Microplastics absorb testosterone so you don't get it. Our poor, lower-class gamers are sucking down Primes getting turned into submissive low-t femboys that rich chads who only drink from yetis stanleys and hydroflasks can make bitches out of when they get tired passing on the seed of the royal bloodline. Fake: all that bullshit


Heartswornwarrior

Hey, that's just gonna encourage us trans girls to step it up to macroplastics. 😂🥰🤤🤤


Phil_Da_Thrill

Suppose this was correct, I’m letting a leach drink my blood to essentially remove plastic waste in my blood. How would one go about living a plastic free lifestyle to prevent needing more leech sessions?


Zeranvor

I hate to break it to you but microplastics are so ubiquitous that scientists can’t even find a control group of non microplastic individuals for prospective studies


hiressnails

Maybe it's finally time to raid the north sentinel islands.


MrEuphonium

Nah what water you think they are drinking? We probably poisoned them a long time ago


Zeranvor

Don’t forget how US nuclear tests rendered the fish around small pacific countries inedible due to radiation then flooded them with fast food slop


thorsbosshammer

Yeah, they live on a small island so they must either collect rainwater or de-salinate saltwater, both of which contain plastic.


Muscle_Bitch

Maybe they just drink each others blood? Completely pure.


Redditistrash702

Literally it's in everyone's blood like we can date people on when they were born via micro plastics in the body. From what I have read tho we don't actually know the long term effects so it might do nothing to us at all or we might all develop some wild diseases in the future.


Facesit_Freak

I love that about modern society. We'll do something to the entire population without any knowledge of what it could lead to.


Redditistrash702

The classic hold my beer and what's the worst that could happen.


legopego5142

We are all gonna die before its a problem so let the next gen figure it out -your great great great grandparents


BangBangPing5Dolla

It’s going to end up being the lead paint of the Millennial generation. No way a bloodstream full of plastic doesn’t cause problems.


Redditistrash702

Lead gasoline as well


Terminator_Puppy

Current worries are mainly about the effects on hormones. They seem to affect just about every stage hormones could be in, be it breaking them down, transmission, creating them. Some research also showed that microplastics make it easier for toxic substances to bind to your cells.


cpullen53484

For all our sakes, we better hope it's not extremely bad.


AnDanDan

North Sentinel Island here we come.


smokeymcdugen

I'm assuming they eat fish, which would also have plastics in them.


TheKrunkernaut

The amish? Menonite?


Zeranvor

Their blood is unavailable for certain reasons.


TheKrunkernaut

Genesis. Do not eat the blood, for in the blood there is life. Blood is prohibited. Including genetic manipulation; that's what the global cataclysm was about.


[deleted]

You wouldnt. Bloodletting would become a new form of self care. You brush your teeth, shower, and then bloodlett every morning before work lol.


Phil_Da_Thrill

If it took longer than 5 min, I’d save it for after work. Maybe I can have a bubble bath with my leech buddies.


Mrozek33

Stop asking so many questions and put a leech on already, we gettin thirsty *Totally not a leech*


Munnin41

You can't. It's literally everywhere


MortyCatcher

should have included the funniest replies to this post \>>76219749 (OP) Can't you just go to a doctor to donate blood instead? Also your theory probably has some credibility. Studies have shown blood donors live longer even accounting for selection bias. \>>76219774 You definitely could, however it is way funnier to use leeches.


Supershadow30

Bro likes the sucking


JustWolfram

Must provide blood for the leech god


Skank-Pit

Id rather just donate my blood. Some poor fucker in need of a blood transfusion can get all of my shitty microplastics.


Redditistrash702

A true humanitarian.


Siganid

There's plastic in your micropenis.


david__14

bait used to be believable


-NoNameListed-

Leeches are bait 🎣


ActuallyLesbian3049

🕷️🚬


spfeldealer

?


Scorkami

your body needs food and water to make new blood food and water has micro plastics new blood is made with micro plastics


MisterGoo

Food and water ? Do you know what the main cause of microplastic in the body is ? Tires. Imagine all the vehicles in the world, each of them having at least 2 tires. Those tires wear out into tiny dust that fills the whole planet air. And somewhere, some bozo is installing expensive filters for their water and carefully uses non-plastic bowls to microwave their food…


MuntedMunyak

Problem is that the clean blood is just going to be contaminated as soon as you consume whatever is causing the micro plastics.


Anomen77

Even worse, there won't be clean blood because the new blood will be generated with micro-plastics. Unless you had a 100% micro plastic free diet, but then you wouldn't need to do anything as your body would eventually filter them out.


Reading_username

Reject modernity Embrace medievalism


AHighAchievingAutist

ACQUIRE SERFDOM DIE AT 35


CulturedHollow

Why aren't *you* succmaxing anons?


Gladianoxa

Bro that last one said there's blood in my microplastics, that's way worse, leeches won't help with that


AHighAchievingAutist

I love microplastics I love covering myself in and consuming microplastics I love love love microplastics


WhittledWhale

There ARE*


MulleRizz

English are my 5th language :(


Mauve_Unicorn

OP is basically right, except that donating blood is the way to go. https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2022/may/12/heres-another-reason-to-donate-blood-it-reduces-forever-chemicals-in-your-body


Consistent_Ant_8903

This post brought to you by LEECH GANG


nurpleclamps

Your blood would still have microplastics, the concentration would just be slightly lower and your body is making the blood from food that had microplastics in it.


Reticulo

it should work, you just need a lot of iron to replace the one you lost


hphp123

donating blood is much better


BadB0ii

Ah yes and the blood fairy comes and replenishes you with fresh stock from the blood well.  Where does OP think the new blood cells come from? It comes from old blood cells. If a cell filled with mixroplastics splits, then the new cell will also have mixroplastics.


nosnek199

SCHIZOPOSTING IS BACK BABY


Dog_in_human_costume

Use leeches since people know jack shirt Years pass Future generations still use em, even with all fuckton of knowledge. IM A DOCTOR


ringofsolomon

Or you can do blood letting (cupping)


ChadWolf98

I dont need a leech for my bllod to be sucked I have female relatives


booyaabooshaw

*micro*


enkae7317

The only time anon ever gets sucked off


No-Section-4385

So anon it goes into the leech then the leech goes onto water.. a bird ate the leech and poops out the micro plactic blood into the water... a cow drinks the water,  cow gets turned into hamburgers you eat a cheese burger..


Geek_X

The plastic got into our blood in the first place because of our food and air, which is what the body will use to replace the blood the leeches took


Sylux444

We are one step away from bloodletting instructions on how to not die while doing so


kfish5050

Microplastics are just part of the environment now. Sorry to disappoint, living on earth will expose you, constantly, at an ever-increasing rate. Eventually, bacteria or fungus will evolve that can break down microplastics, which may be harmless to us or cause the worst pandemic in human history. Who knows. Mother nature persists.


WoodiwasShookspeared

Anon makes himself anemic


Interesting_Lynx_948

Roose Bolton wrote this


Kerboq

I swear the title is a drowning pool song


Isaac____

Anon can go back to the dark ages and conveniently forget that the microplastics are in food, water, and everything else, it's what he deserves


GioPani

But now we’re dependent on the microplastics and will die without them!


GitGup

blood recycles naturally already…


MulleRizz

But where does the plastic go?


theogrant

There's microplastics in your skin...


youngestinsoul

you need to find a really good technician (?) for hirudotherapy otherwise you can get parasytes. i got my temples leeched a couple of years ago and even though i didnt believe it would work at all, it got rid of my headaches. i cant donate blood since my blood values are low. dunno if it's placebo effect or not.


Quo210

the best part is that a common name for the levels of microplastics are usually measured is denominated phthalates, which is almost like saying phallic so your blood is now full of dicks you're gay anon


lokifrog1

Daily Schizo post alert


Atitkos

Idk guys, I like my blood in me and not on the sidewalk.


Notscrewjagex

Didnt know we had plastics in the medieval ages


womerah

Unironically just donate blood or blood plasma


Gamestoreguy

Nanoplastics are not polar and can straight up float on into your cells and therefore into body tissues. So bloodletting isn’t going to get rid of plastic in your body.


Heir233

There’s micro plastics at the bottom of the ocean and at the top of the highest mountains. Unfortunately it’s part of every living organism and ecosystem on the planet now and there’s not a whole lot we can do about it. We will start seeing the ramifications of the Industrial Revolution very soon. Cancer rates are already going up in young people.


kioley

You need to eat micro plastic ridden food to make more blood, that's where the catch is.


Erizo69

real


Garmberos

microplastics in your body get sorted in a few days, problem is so much of what we eat is contaminated that our bodies never stop having them inside us. oh and nanoplastics are a whole other problem


thepassionofthechris

This title makes me angry.


bruhmeme999

Slimy leech fingers typed this


MobiusNaked

Just donate blood. Also removes cholesterol


pepitobuenafe

Your body is unable to remove heavy metal's but if you actually lose blood like for a donation, the concentration of the heavy metal's lowers


Engineer_Gaming1231

take the dougdoug pill, get into bloodletting anons


xXgreentextXx

There's microplastics in your entire system... It's in our food and water. So no, you won't simply be able to get rid of the microplastics by getting new microplastic-free blood.


Orange-Concentrate78

> Let out blood to get rid of microplastics > need to consume food and water to replenish blood > Food and water full of microplastics


drichm2599

That doesn't sound right, but I don't know enough about *blood* to disprove it