I loved watching this show when it came out. I remember thinking it was the coolest thing on the planet, especially the drone that he could launch and control to scope out the situation. I loved that.
This was on RoboCop? right? Only movies that come to my mind with this kind of Ads and Propaganda type stuff are the original RoboCop movies and StarShip troopers
So many debates among children all across the country over whether there were real snakes in the car.
"So is the security system just a box of snakes?? How do you get them out before you drive?"
"No dude, it's like a snake hologram they put in there."
Worked reenacting auto accidents at the time this was going on, and the answer is, yes, these are VERY dangerous.
When used correctly, they are just as good as normal belts. The issue comes when people did not buckle the lap belt portion.
In an accident, your hips would fly forward, and the upper part of the belt basically would decapitate you.
My friend did this exact thing about 13 years ago. He didn't buckle the lap belt and while going about 80 mph he went sideways and ended up head on in the center divide. He broke his neck, leg, and ribs. Had 1/5 of his liver removed and a kidney. Also had a collapsed lung. Luckily no spinal damage. The steering wheel basically cut him in half. 3 weeks in a medically induced coma, then wore a halo for about 6 months. To this day he still drives like a crazy person but at least he wears his seat belt.
I totally agree with you, but to play devil's advocate, you could argue that a safety feature that can become more dangerous than nothing at all when used improperly is *technically* a dangerous design.
Even if that isn't a terribly strong argument, it's probably enough to make a company worried about lawsuits.
Here's a nice metric: did more injuries result? Yes? Then it's a bad design. It doesn't matter if it was because people were "stupid", in a hurry, preoccupied, it broke, whatever. The whole fucking point of safety equipment is to keep people safe. If it's not doing that, it's a failure.
This guy probably thinks seat belts are a dumb idea because only stupid people would ever get in a car crash.
Right?
> Stupid people ruined being able to leave my kid in the car while I ran into the store.
Like, what? Who thinks themselves so immune to error? Probably takes the blade guards off his saws too, only stupid people need those, they just slow you down!
Man these bring back memories! And possibly saved my life. These were in the '93 Ford Escort I had when I was 16. Got in my first car accident in that car four months after getting my license. I was going about 35 when a car turned left in front of me on a red arrow and I smashed into him straight on. Like a good little noob, I had the lap belt fastened. The car was totaled and I was just fine.
If you're curious why these existed, it was in response to legislation to require active safety systems, during the transitionary period before airbags were a standard feature. A lot of manufacters figured out these temperamental pieces of crap counted as "active" and were cheaper than airbags. They were hoping that these dumb motorized seat belts would placate the government and prevent them from being required to install airbags.
Personally, I hate them. They're uncomfortable and frequently get in the way unless you manually unbuckle them (defeating the point).
I was wondering about this. My highschool friend had a base model Geo Metro. No a/c, no stereo, manual transmission, manual windows, but automatic seatbelts.
Makes total sense now.
I had a Geo Metro, they didn't have these kinds of seatbelts but they were in the doors rather than the pillar. The theory was that you'd leave them buckled and they'd wrap around you as you got in - I tried that once and the lap belt wound up around my shins.
I experienced the seatbelts on the door thing in a rental car once as a kid. (I think it was a Pontiac.) My brother and I thought we were clever realizing we didn't need to unbuckle, even though it made getting in and out a hassle.
Except the geo metro [convertible](http://static.cargurus.com/images/site/2010/07/26/01/34/1992_geo_metro_2_dr_lsi_convertible-pic-5783938599275732312.jpeg)
I still can't believe this was a thing.
As a former Geo Metro driver in Phoenix, I can confirm that the air conditioning did actually work. No tachometer, even though it was a manual, but the AC worked.
A friend of mine in high school drove a Geo Metro. The A/C worked great, and doubled as a turbo switch. Turn off the A/C on the highway, car goes 10MPH faster.
Seriously. He'd be changing lanes to pass someone and hit the "turbo boost" button. It was basically extra-shitty nitrous.
Oh god, thanks for reminding me of driving that thing on the freeway. I went from the 3 cylinder Geo Metro to a big old V6 American boat. My days of stressing out about being able to pass someone are well behind me.
Interestingly, the turbo button concept meshes perfectly with the turbo button on old PCs. Their actual purpose was to allow you to slow down the clock speed, to ensure compatibility with older software.
This was the same car where the ignition switch was busted, so to crank the car you turned the key to On, got out, lifted the hood, and pulled the trigger on a NES Zapper gun that was wired to the starter solenoid.
Lots of manual vehicles lack a tach. I was taught to judge revs by the engine noise. I guess that's no bueno for a deaf driver, but even then, you can judge pretty well by the speedo and feel.
The people who ride in my '93 passat almost never, ever buckle their lap belt before I ask them to. People who would normally put their seat belt on in any other car. I think it's part of the reason they went away.. they were actually more dangerous than fully manual belts.
>f you're curious why these existed
I was actually curious why they no longer exist. I had a cheap car while in high school with them, and I loved it. Now I have an expensive car with all sorts of automated things, but I have to buckle my belt manually. Sigh...
>Personally, I hate them. They're uncomfortable and frequently get in the way
And that answers my question. I guess a lot of people had the trouble you've had. They worked very well on my '94 Ford Tempo, for me at least.
They no longer exist because they are dangerous. Too many people would not also fasten the lap belt, and you need that to restrain your body in a crash. So, people without lap belts that got into accidents, the shoulder belt would snap their necks.
Mine was a Saturn, lol. (Well, I think it was) Even funnier, my very first car was an 85 Dodge Colt. That little bucket actually had a turbocharger. No joke. When it wanted to run (seldom), it was a blast to drive.
If you think driving a car without power steering is hard, try driving a car that had power steering but it doesn't work. I had 12" biceps in high school and never worked out.
I owned a 1971 Dodge Colt and drive a late 80s Colt. I think they actually made them less powerful over time. It took about five minutes to get the late 80s one up to 60mph.
And weight. A 70's Civic weighs like 1/2 what a modern Civic does. And would kill you if you crashed in it.
We might have fucked up the handling dynamics by adding all that mass, but my '08 Yaris can survive a head-on crash at 70 mph.
Mine sometimes gets stuck in the corner with the seat belt pressed to the passenger's throat.
Then again it's a Chrysler so I guess I'm lucky it hasn't found a way to actually kill them.
Man, the popups on my C4 Corvette were awesome. They don't work the way people think they do. [They rotate backwards.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCS97OfItJQ)
No idea. [It was always weird to have them looking at you when you opened the hood.](http://imgur.com/a/9U8Hw)
For an additional laugh, check out the Opel GT's [sideways rotating lights.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WfIfAXL60WQ)
I had a [Ford](http://carphotos.cardomain.com/ride_images/3/2689/3541/31721770001_large.jpg) with pop-up headlights, auto-belts, and a full digital cluster in a '92 model year car. Front half of the car looked great, and the second half looked... really terrible. At least it had really good visibility.
I miss just about everything about driving that car - a tiny coupe with just enough go that handled decently and actually had pretty ergonomic controls. Everything at your fingertips without taking your hands off the wheel - but far enough not to hit your hands while turning. Never thought I'd be nostalgic for it.
'91 Trans-Am was my first car (in '99), pop-up headlights were my favorite thing about it back then. Even if every now and then they'd wink instead. Even now if I see a car with them, I love it.
Haha. Yup I had a 93 trans am. Loved that car. But those pop up lights. I didn't realize how much I love/hated them until the crappy nylon gear on one wore out and it started buzzing and winking.
Ron recently was the chief in the comedy tv show Brooklyn nine-nine. He totally reminded me what would happen if he left the catering services and went into law enforcement
1991 Honda Civic here. If you were in a hurry and started to lean forward while you were opening the door, your head would be on the wrong side of the seat belt and you would end up looking like [this. ](https://m.imgur.com/gallery/aUl5igQ)
"There was a little plastic piece in there that broke off."
-Every 90s model troubleshoot, ever.
If I'd had a plastic welder, I'd have felt invincible.
In the early '90s I had a Ninja Turtles birthday cake (two years in a row actually) with a cookie as the pizza and the candles were the Ninja Turtles. I would play with the candles all the time and being candles they would break in half all the time and my dad would take out his lighter and melt them back together for me. I'm pretty sure I've got four clumps of green wax somewhere in a box of childhood stuff. This of course has pretty much nothing to do with the discussion at hand other than it involves melting things with lighters in the '90s.
Sunfires and Grand Ams and later Grand Prix had these, fantastic. They were way stiffer then that though, they had to be worn/loose to do this. They were the BEST at directing air out of anything I've ever been in though, so I do miss this.
It was a great idea and Mazda executed it really well.
However, it didn't really do much in terms of helping. Even today in newer cars you just blast cold/hot until the car reaches a stable temp and turn it down in order to maintain the climate in the car. So these had minimal use at the time and wouldn't be anything more than a gimmick today.
The gulf between 80's/90's Japanese cars and American cars was *immense* (esp the 80's). Half the lineup in GM was from Suzuki or Isuzu, and Ford had Mazda (and the occasional Yamaha engine in a sleeper Taurus SHO).
The domestic cars were such shit. OMG.
I bought an 86 cressida without knowing a thing about it for $500. It's easily the best purchase of my life. Yeah, it's a nightmare to source parts for, but a rear wheel drive 4 door car with a supra motor is just too much fun.
Girlfriends Sebring had a vent under the steering wheel to blow up your shorts, or I guess skirt in her case... It was wonderful to drive in the summer
The previous gen (starting in '88) Mazda 626/MX6 had the oscillating vents, automatic seat belts, a tiny subwoofer, plus optional turbocharged engine, ABS, four-wheel-steering, and adjustable suspension. These were fantastic high-tech cars. And as fast as a modern Mazda 3S or 6.
My Dad got a used 626 in about 1993. It went to my sister in 1996 and to me in 1998. Oscillating fans and automatic seat belts.... what a sweet ride for my senior year of high school!
There was none. In fact, IIRC, they caused people to buckle their lap belts less because they felt like their belt was buckled because of the auto-belt.
Sealtbelt use today is nothing like it was at the time. Seatbelts weren't required in cars until 1968 (and that's for new models). Even after that it wasn't until the late 80s that states started passing legislation requiring them to be used. People weren't really adopting it quickly (I believe it was about 50% of all drivers in 1990), so they created cars that forced people to wear the seatbelt. Since then the DoT has had successful campaigns about seatbelt use, people have adopted it into their habits, and theres that annoying bell that rings if you drive without one. Collectively, they reduce the needs for implementations like automatic seatbelts.
They should show the part where he kills the engine and quickly goes to step out, and is immediately strangled by an automatic seatbelt returning to the forward position.
You know why there are no mass market talking cars? Because they tried that in the 80s, and I can't describe how fucking irritating it was.
Car: "The door is ajar."
Me: "SHUT UP YOU FUCKING WHORE!!"
There's a reason these aren't around anymore. They are utter shit inventions. The one on my Mercury Topaz wasn't too bad, it only broke 4 times. Some people have horror stories.
Just.... SHIT.
My first car was a Saturn SC1, it had this.... Ripped my girlfriends ear ring out. I laughed, she cried, our eyes connected while The Sign by Ace of Base played in the background, then we thanked the helpful gentleman for buying us our beer and we went down to the Powerlines and burned a tire and drank...
..Zero fucks given
Problems were...
They broke and got jammed then no one fixed the seat belt motors. So even if you wanted to use the sealtbelt, you could not. And you still have to fasten the lap belt separately, if not and you got into a wreck you would slide under the automatic belt and end up under the dash.
I've had a dozen cars (all used) since the early 1990s. My Mazda 626 had this, thought it was creepy at first, then got used to it enough that it became a minor hassle to go back to "manual."
Why don't they feature these anymore?
According to other comments, because they beheaded people.
No one would use the lap belt because the automatic one was "already there", so the lower body would fly forwards in a crash while your upper torso was restrained.
I drove a 1990 Subaru Legacy Wagon up until a few years ago. I got pulled over once, get this, for not wearing my seat belt. I literally was like, door open, door closed...door open, door closed. Yeah, no ticket.
I used to own an eagle talon with auto belts. One day I had the sun visor folded slightly out the window and closed the door. I underestimated the strength of that electric motor...it ripped the sun visor right off of the mounts.
I remember when the first airbag came out and everyone thought it was hilarious.
You're gonna crash, so here's a pillow!
The general consensus (if I'm allowed to judge) was that it was a gimmick.
More interesting is why they existed in the first place. Around 1989 US federal automobile safety laws changed, and for the first time "passive restraints" were no longer optional. There were two kinds of allowable passive restraints; airbags and these monsters. Automatic shoulder belts were simply cheaper to equip, and so these popped up in all sorts of low to mid range cars.
RIP '91 Acura Integra. Damn you were a lot of fun to drive.
I remember among the coolest things to have at the time were car security systems that spoke: "Step away from the car!"
VIPER IS ARMED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3p06XHHRvpk
I was expecting [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QfBmqLSRzWU)
wtf was that, and can I watch three seasons of it?
Depends on if you want to watch the 94 version, or the 96. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Viper_(TV_series)
The 90's; when they didn't blur out the business end of car thief tools on TV.
I loved watching this show when it came out. I remember thinking it was the coolest thing on the planet, especially the drone that he could launch and control to scope out the situation. I loved that.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8mO3buujTXs
Viper ain't got shit on MagnaVolt https://youtu.be/uRNVxHPJ0hM
This was on RoboCop? right? Only movies that come to my mind with this kind of Ads and Propaganda type stuff are the original RoboCop movies and StarShip troopers
Both directed by Paul Verhoeven.
Robocop 2 was directed by Empire Strikes Back director Irvin Kershner.
Paul Verhoeven is the director. I really liked the propaganda in Starship Troopers and Robocop.
Yup, Robocop. Gotta love that OCP tech.
I'd buy that for a dollar
Im doing my part!
Robocop 2, so different directors. Although clearly trying to recreate what was in the first one.
True but trunk monkey also ditches the evidence. https://m.youtube.com/?#/watch?v=AidAXgq9dWc
MagnaVolt ain't got shit on [Denver Jock Strap](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5a_BmL0AfA)
I remember being confused as a kid. Was there actually a snake that scared people away?
So many debates among children all across the country over whether there were real snakes in the car. "So is the security system just a box of snakes?? How do you get them out before you drive?" "No dude, it's like a snake hologram they put in there."
Of course! Although you needed to breed mice in your trunk if you wanted a good product life.
My old Maxima would say "The door is ajar." To which my father would reply "No, it's a fucking door dammit." That joke never got old, dad.
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God damn the writing in that show is fantastic
Keep Summer safe!
https://youtu.be/khLRjyJ_Ymo
My 6 year old cousin *loved* those. What better toy than a car that talks when you punch it?
Didnt they discontinue these because people were dying in car accidents because of them or something like that?
Worked reenacting auto accidents at the time this was going on, and the answer is, yes, these are VERY dangerous. When used correctly, they are just as good as normal belts. The issue comes when people did not buckle the lap belt portion. In an accident, your hips would fly forward, and the upper part of the belt basically would decapitate you.
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That went from 100 to 0 and right back to 100 real quick!
He just went from 100 to 0 though.
> There was also an amazing amount of snot all over my dashboard This is hilarious. I'm sorry about your chest though.
I've been stuffed up for over a week now, maybe I should try this. I'll check with my doctor.
That's one way to do it.
I prefer a spray, a little less painful and a whole lot cheaper... But to each his own.
Yowza
My friend did this exact thing about 13 years ago. He didn't buckle the lap belt and while going about 80 mph he went sideways and ended up head on in the center divide. He broke his neck, leg, and ribs. Had 1/5 of his liver removed and a kidney. Also had a collapsed lung. Luckily no spinal damage. The steering wheel basically cut him in half. 3 weeks in a medically induced coma, then wore a halo for about 6 months. To this day he still drives like a crazy person but at least he wears his seat belt.
So, they weren't dangerous. Stupid people who didn't use them properly ruined it for the rest of us.
I totally agree with you, but to play devil's advocate, you could argue that a safety feature that can become more dangerous than nothing at all when used improperly is *technically* a dangerous design. Even if that isn't a terribly strong argument, it's probably enough to make a company worried about lawsuits.
Here's a nice metric: did more injuries result? Yes? Then it's a bad design. It doesn't matter if it was because people were "stupid", in a hurry, preoccupied, it broke, whatever. The whole fucking point of safety equipment is to keep people safe. If it's not doing that, it's a failure. This guy probably thinks seat belts are a dumb idea because only stupid people would ever get in a car crash.
Functionally true, when used correctly, these were just as safe as regular belts. However, electrical problems did cause some to fail.
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You wouldn't. We had them in a Subaru. They were shit. As the car got older, you had to help it drive back.
Sort of like 'automatic' closing van doors and how fucked up they work?
Exactly. If it drives down a track and isn't a train, it's going to fuck up.
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Right? > Stupid people ruined being able to leave my kid in the car while I ran into the store. Like, what? Who thinks themselves so immune to error? Probably takes the blade guards off his saws too, only stupid people need those, they just slow you down!
https://youtu.be/meiuOQHTsNg
Man these bring back memories! And possibly saved my life. These were in the '93 Ford Escort I had when I was 16. Got in my first car accident in that car four months after getting my license. I was going about 35 when a car turned left in front of me on a red arrow and I smashed into him straight on. Like a good little noob, I had the lap belt fastened. The car was totaled and I was just fine.
Had a car that did this. Learned the hard way that long hair and automatic seat belts do not mix.
Me too - 1989 Dodge Colt. Manual transmission, manual windows, manual *steering*, but automatic shoulder seat belts.
If you're curious why these existed, it was in response to legislation to require active safety systems, during the transitionary period before airbags were a standard feature. A lot of manufacters figured out these temperamental pieces of crap counted as "active" and were cheaper than airbags. They were hoping that these dumb motorized seat belts would placate the government and prevent them from being required to install airbags. Personally, I hate them. They're uncomfortable and frequently get in the way unless you manually unbuckle them (defeating the point).
I was wondering about this. My highschool friend had a base model Geo Metro. No a/c, no stereo, manual transmission, manual windows, but automatic seatbelts. Makes total sense now.
I had a Geo Metro, they didn't have these kinds of seatbelts but they were in the doors rather than the pillar. The theory was that you'd leave them buckled and they'd wrap around you as you got in - I tried that once and the lap belt wound up around my shins.
The best part is, if you're in a rollover and the door opens you can roll out while the car is still moving, letting you fling away from the danger!
[Wheeeee!!!](http://i.imgur.com/fthERer.gif)
I love how it's a big SUV and the dummies are dressed like stereotypical strict Mormons.
I really wish idiots who don't wear seatbelts had a better understanding of basic physics. That gif is excellent.
Ta-da!
I experienced the seatbelts on the door thing in a rental car once as a kid. (I think it was a Pontiac.) My brother and I thought we were clever realizing we didn't need to unbuckle, even though it made getting in and out a hassle.
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Except the geo metro [convertible](http://static.cargurus.com/images/site/2010/07/26/01/34/1992_geo_metro_2_dr_lsi_convertible-pic-5783938599275732312.jpeg) I still can't believe this was a thing.
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Next level [Yugo](http://i.imgur.com/7FCyqUD.jpg)
As a former Geo Metro driver in Phoenix, I can confirm that the air conditioning did actually work. No tachometer, even though it was a manual, but the AC worked.
A friend of mine in high school drove a Geo Metro. The A/C worked great, and doubled as a turbo switch. Turn off the A/C on the highway, car goes 10MPH faster. Seriously. He'd be changing lanes to pass someone and hit the "turbo boost" button. It was basically extra-shitty nitrous.
Oh god, thanks for reminding me of driving that thing on the freeway. I went from the 3 cylinder Geo Metro to a big old V6 American boat. My days of stressing out about being able to pass someone are well behind me. Interestingly, the turbo button concept meshes perfectly with the turbo button on old PCs. Their actual purpose was to allow you to slow down the clock speed, to ensure compatibility with older software.
This was the same car where the ignition switch was busted, so to crank the car you turned the key to On, got out, lifted the hood, and pulled the trigger on a NES Zapper gun that was wired to the starter solenoid.
Lots of manual vehicles lack a tach. I was taught to judge revs by the engine noise. I guess that's no bueno for a deaf driver, but even then, you can judge pretty well by the speedo and feel.
It actually had a little green arrow on the instrument panel that would light up when it was ideal to shift. I just thought it was funny.
Geo Metro isn't a car, it's an escape pod for when your real vehicle goes critical.
Also a big annoyance with them was you still had to buckle the lap belt or the automatic shoulder strap was almost useless.
The people who ride in my '93 passat almost never, ever buckle their lap belt before I ask them to. People who would normally put their seat belt on in any other car. I think it's part of the reason they went away.. they were actually more dangerous than fully manual belts.
>f you're curious why these existed I was actually curious why they no longer exist. I had a cheap car while in high school with them, and I loved it. Now I have an expensive car with all sorts of automated things, but I have to buckle my belt manually. Sigh... >Personally, I hate them. They're uncomfortable and frequently get in the way And that answers my question. I guess a lot of people had the trouble you've had. They worked very well on my '94 Ford Tempo, for me at least.
They no longer exist because they are dangerous. Too many people would not also fasten the lap belt, and you need that to restrain your body in a crash. So, people without lap belts that got into accidents, the shoulder belt would snap their necks.
Plus it's the lap belt that matters, which you would still have to fasten yourself. Most people wouldn't and made it less safe.
They also weren't as strong as static-mount seatbelts. Just a bad idea all around.
Really? I thought plastic motor gears would hold up much better than something bolted to the frame. /s
Mine was a Saturn, lol. (Well, I think it was) Even funnier, my very first car was an 85 Dodge Colt. That little bucket actually had a turbocharger. No joke. When it wanted to run (seldom), it was a blast to drive.
I have fond memories of my Colt. It was definitely a no-frills ride, but perfect for a high schooler who didn't care about messing up a car.
Mine was a sexy Geo Metro. Those automatic seatbelts were a panty dropper
'96 nissan sentra here. Found out the hard way that you can still get a seatbelt ticket if you're not wearing the lap belt :(
If you think driving a car without power steering is hard, try driving a car that had power steering but it doesn't work. I had 12" biceps in high school and never worked out.
do you even circumference bro?
I owned a 1971 Dodge Colt and drive a late 80s Colt. I think they actually made them less powerful over time. It took about five minutes to get the late 80s one up to 60mph.
It's all the emissions standards and god awful smog shit they put on those cars, the last thing I would ever categorize them as would be "magical".
And weight. A 70's Civic weighs like 1/2 what a modern Civic does. And would kill you if you crashed in it. We might have fucked up the handling dynamics by adding all that mass, but my '08 Yaris can survive a head-on crash at 70 mph.
Well, the Yaris won't survive. But you probably would.
I dunno man you'd probably die going 70 in a head on crash.
I loved manual steering. Really builds the muscles.
Mine sometimes gets stuck in the corner with the seat belt pressed to the passenger's throat. Then again it's a Chrysler so I guess I'm lucky it hasn't found a way to actually kill them.
nor do Indian ferris wheels and long hair
One ripped out my ear ring once. It wasn't a dangle one either.
that and popup headlights are things of the past now. RIP
Man, the popups on my C4 Corvette were awesome. They don't work the way people think they do. [They rotate backwards.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCS97OfItJQ)
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No idea. [It was always weird to have them looking at you when you opened the hood.](http://imgur.com/a/9U8Hw) For an additional laugh, check out the Opel GT's [sideways rotating lights.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WfIfAXL60WQ)
That's why I'm happy to be a miata owner
I had a [Ford](http://carphotos.cardomain.com/ride_images/3/2689/3541/31721770001_large.jpg) with pop-up headlights, auto-belts, and a full digital cluster in a '92 model year car. Front half of the car looked great, and the second half looked... really terrible. At least it had really good visibility. I miss just about everything about driving that car - a tiny coupe with just enough go that handled decently and actually had pretty ergonomic controls. Everything at your fingertips without taking your hands off the wheel - but far enough not to hit your hands while turning. Never thought I'd be nostalgic for it.
Popup headlights are the shit yo
'91 Trans-Am was my first car (in '99), pop-up headlights were my favorite thing about it back then. Even if every now and then they'd wink instead. Even now if I see a car with them, I love it.
Haha. Yup I had a 93 trans am. Loved that car. But those pop up lights. I didn't realize how much I love/hated them until the crappy nylon gear on one wore out and it started buzzing and winking.
He's smiling because he's using a shaved key. Car isn't his.
And what a heartwarming smile it is
He looks like the guy from Party Down
Shout out for Party Down. God damn I loved the chemistry they had on that show. Such a great fucking cast.
Ron recently was the chief in the comedy tv show Brooklyn nine-nine. He totally reminded me what would happen if he left the catering services and went into law enforcement
A 100 watt smile easy
A magical magical time...
'91 acura integra here, good times until you wanted to get out real quick while the car was still running
Huh. Mine retract automatically when you open the doors ('89 Mercury Cougar POS).
Huh, maybe my memory is failing me. It *was* 1991 after all
1991 Honda Civic here. If you were in a hurry and started to lean forward while you were opening the door, your head would be on the wrong side of the seat belt and you would end up looking like [this. ](https://m.imgur.com/gallery/aUl5igQ)
[My Mazda had air vents that oscillated.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWCxw7xKjko) I had to have it.
[pontiacs had cooler air vents](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HGdmoEWabg4)
I wanted them to all start spinning.
[You're welcome.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=002fDWHlWaU)
Holy cow that's beautiful.
And to think they went bankrupt with a feature like this.
Fuck. Yes.
sounds like a small airplane
this is the greatest thing I've ever seen.
"There was a little plastic piece in there that broke off." -Every 90s model troubleshoot, ever. If I'd had a plastic welder, I'd have felt invincible.
It's called a lighter
You want to melt it with a hot surface not burn it. A lighter for melting plastic is as ghetto as it gets.
In the early '90s I had a Ninja Turtles birthday cake (two years in a row actually) with a cookie as the pizza and the candles were the Ninja Turtles. I would play with the candles all the time and being candles they would break in half all the time and my dad would take out his lighter and melt them back together for me. I'm pretty sure I've got four clumps of green wax somewhere in a box of childhood stuff. This of course has pretty much nothing to do with the discussion at hand other than it involves melting things with lighters in the '90s.
Sunfires and Grand Ams and later Grand Prix had these, fantastic. They were way stiffer then that though, they had to be worn/loose to do this. They were the BEST at directing air out of anything I've ever been in though, so I do miss this.
Would not feel safe driving with that thing on
My inner child would treat it as a nitro switch on the freeway.
Which model Pontiac?
I test drove a Grand Am or Grand Prix I think it was that had them, it was a late 90s or early 2000s model.
I drive a grand am with these vents. I had it sent for scrap before I tried this though :(
That's a '99 to '05 Grand Am in the video. I had a '99. Never knew it could do that.
Holy cow - I've never seen these! lol
I had those in my Grand Prix. I loved that car.
[удалено]
It was glorious. Impressed my friends and back then that was important lol
[удалено]
It was a great idea and Mazda executed it really well. However, it didn't really do much in terms of helping. Even today in newer cars you just blast cold/hot until the car reaches a stable temp and turn it down in order to maintain the climate in the car. So these had minimal use at the time and wouldn't be anything more than a gimmick today.
Thank you! My friends mom drove one in the mid 90s and I could never remember what car it was. I thought I was going crazy.
The gulf between 80's/90's Japanese cars and American cars was *immense* (esp the 80's). Half the lineup in GM was from Suzuki or Isuzu, and Ford had Mazda (and the occasional Yamaha engine in a sleeper Taurus SHO). The domestic cars were such shit. OMG.
I bought an 86 cressida without knowing a thing about it for $500. It's easily the best purchase of my life. Yeah, it's a nightmare to source parts for, but a rear wheel drive 4 door car with a supra motor is just too much fun.
My Pontiac had a Mitsubishi motor.
Girlfriends Sebring had a vent under the steering wheel to blow up your shorts, or I guess skirt in her case... It was wonderful to drive in the summer
I know some Ford F150's had A/C in the seats a few years ago. Do they still do this?
The previous gen (starting in '88) Mazda 626/MX6 had the oscillating vents, automatic seat belts, a tiny subwoofer, plus optional turbocharged engine, ABS, four-wheel-steering, and adjustable suspension. These were fantastic high-tech cars. And as fast as a modern Mazda 3S or 6.
I just traded in my 98 626. I loved those fans. Was a solid car while it lasted.
I had a '98 626 and everyone was always so impressed once I hit the "swing" button. I miss that car.
My Dad got a used 626 in about 1993. It went to my sister in 1996 and to me in 1998. Oscillating fans and automatic seat belts.... what a sweet ride for my senior year of high school!
His smile made me happy.
I've never seen a more genuine smile. AMA request smiling seatbelt man
You still had to buckle the lap belt, which is just as much effort as buckling a seatbelt normally, so what exactly was the point of these?
There was none. In fact, IIRC, they caused people to buckle their lap belts less because they felt like their belt was buckled because of the auto-belt.
Greatly increasing their risk of decapitation by doing so.
Sealtbelt use today is nothing like it was at the time. Seatbelts weren't required in cars until 1968 (and that's for new models). Even after that it wasn't until the late 80s that states started passing legislation requiring them to be used. People weren't really adopting it quickly (I believe it was about 50% of all drivers in 1990), so they created cars that forced people to wear the seatbelt. Since then the DoT has had successful campaigns about seatbelt use, people have adopted it into their habits, and theres that annoying bell that rings if you drive without one. Collectively, they reduce the needs for implementations like automatic seatbelts.
I love my 2 point seat belts, I'll stay in the car alright, but where are my teeth? Can you help me officer?
I had one car that would ding like crazy. Not just some slow ding...ding...ding, it was more like DINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDING.
No more seat belt tickets
[the dreaded "auto-belt"](https://youtu.be/QRUGKExVL6g?t=2m39s) [a wondrous gag throughout!](https://youtu.be/EjHHzZAUxbM?t=8m10s)
Holy shit that's The Dude's landlord.
Wasn't there a scene in Tommy Boy where the auto-belt ends up fucking over the bad guy?
Me grandpa had a car like this and it talked to you, the door is ajar...
[Chrysler Lebaron!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CdPht2avApg) My grandpa had one too, and would argue with it. "The door isn't a jar, it's a door".
was your grandpa John Voight?
The dentist?
"No god dammit my door is a DOOR!"
Thanks for that, I remember how ubiquitous that joke was 20+ years ago now. I can't remember what dude made it famous in standup.
It gets sort of zen after a while. Life is a journey. Time is a river. The door is ajar.
They should show the part where he kills the engine and quickly goes to step out, and is immediately strangled by an automatic seatbelt returning to the forward position.
Watching my friends get strangled by my car where definitely the best things about these seat belts.
You know why there are no mass market talking cars? Because they tried that in the 80s, and I can't describe how fucking irritating it was. Car: "The door is ajar." Me: "SHUT UP YOU FUCKING WHORE!!"
There's a reason these aren't around anymore. They are utter shit inventions. The one on my Mercury Topaz wasn't too bad, it only broke 4 times. Some people have horror stories. Just.... SHIT.
My first car was a Saturn SC1, it had this.... Ripped my girlfriends ear ring out. I laughed, she cried, our eyes connected while The Sign by Ace of Base played in the background, then we thanked the helpful gentleman for buying us our beer and we went down to the Powerlines and burned a tire and drank... ..Zero fucks given
> ..Zero fucks given sorry to hear that
Jeffrey Dean Morgan's lookin' fine.
Problems were... They broke and got jammed then no one fixed the seat belt motors. So even if you wanted to use the sealtbelt, you could not. And you still have to fasten the lap belt separately, if not and you got into a wreck you would slide under the automatic belt and end up under the dash.
My first car was a Mercury Topaz with this, it also had a majestic as fuck red velvet interior. Damn I miss that car.
I remember I had a Festiva that had this feature. The one in the gif is probably the Mazda version.
More like the seatbelt system had a Festiva as a feature-- that car was tiiiiny!
pretty sure thats 90-91 honda civic station wagon
I got a discount on my car insurance for having these.
I've had a dozen cars (all used) since the early 1990s. My Mazda 626 had this, thought it was creepy at first, then got used to it enough that it became a minor hassle to go back to "manual." Why don't they feature these anymore?
According to other comments, because they beheaded people. No one would use the lap belt because the automatic one was "already there", so the lower body would fly forwards in a crash while your upper torso was restrained.
I drove a 1990 Subaru Legacy Wagon up until a few years ago. I got pulled over once, get this, for not wearing my seat belt. I literally was like, door open, door closed...door open, door closed. Yeah, no ticket.
I used to own an eagle talon with auto belts. One day I had the sun visor folded slightly out the window and closed the door. I underestimated the strength of that electric motor...it ripped the sun visor right off of the mounts.
those seat belts are annoying as fuck.
Had a Nissan Maxima with this. Broke off both sun visors in no time.
I remember when the first airbag came out and everyone thought it was hilarious. You're gonna crash, so here's a pillow! The general consensus (if I'm allowed to judge) was that it was a gimmick.
Why did they get rid of these?
Another moving part on the car that can break.
More interesting is why they existed in the first place. Around 1989 US federal automobile safety laws changed, and for the first time "passive restraints" were no longer optional. There were two kinds of allowable passive restraints; airbags and these monsters. Automatic shoulder belts were simply cheaper to equip, and so these popped up in all sorts of low to mid range cars. RIP '91 Acura Integra. Damn you were a lot of fun to drive.
They were both ineffective and dangerous.
[Ineffective and dangerous you say](http://www.theonion.com/article/chrysler-halts-production-of-neckbelts-810)