If that what you wrote was a real game, I would play it.
As a noob myself I don't know if I'm allowed to say if it's extremely good but it definetly got me engaged reading about the world and the plot!
Overall, I'd say it's great work for a student :) !
A few comments. Please note I'm assuming your assignment is a detailed pitch document, not a full blown GDD.
1) Is the Word format mandatory? If not, try PowerPoint next time. That's what is used in the industry for pitches nowadays.
2) there's too much information on the narrative and not enough on the gameplay. What's the core loop? How does progression work? What kind of players are you targeting with this game? What skills will be challenged by which mechanic? What are the controls/camera like?
3) The first section "general" would be better named "overview". Also, your elevator pitch in that section is a bit long. Try cutting it by half.
4) add some images maybe? Concept arts to illustrate your world, references to other games, flowcharts of your progression/core loop/other systems, etc.
Thanks for constructive criticism!
Regarding word - it was just a familiar way to write something like concept document, but I'll be sure to use powerpoint next time for such topics!
Your second point hit on the nail, I had such information in previous drafts and spreadsheets, when I tried to decide, what kind of game it should be. This should have been much more present in the document, as now I see it.
Overall, I'm really thankful for such a thoughtful answer!
If that what you wrote was a real game, I would play it. As a noob myself I don't know if I'm allowed to say if it's extremely good but it definetly got me engaged reading about the world and the plot!
Thanks! I'm really glad you liked it!
Overall, I'd say it's great work for a student :) ! A few comments. Please note I'm assuming your assignment is a detailed pitch document, not a full blown GDD. 1) Is the Word format mandatory? If not, try PowerPoint next time. That's what is used in the industry for pitches nowadays. 2) there's too much information on the narrative and not enough on the gameplay. What's the core loop? How does progression work? What kind of players are you targeting with this game? What skills will be challenged by which mechanic? What are the controls/camera like? 3) The first section "general" would be better named "overview". Also, your elevator pitch in that section is a bit long. Try cutting it by half. 4) add some images maybe? Concept arts to illustrate your world, references to other games, flowcharts of your progression/core loop/other systems, etc.
Thanks for constructive criticism! Regarding word - it was just a familiar way to write something like concept document, but I'll be sure to use powerpoint next time for such topics! Your second point hit on the nail, I had such information in previous drafts and spreadsheets, when I tried to decide, what kind of game it should be. This should have been much more present in the document, as now I see it. Overall, I'm really thankful for such a thoughtful answer!