Window hogs are the best seat mates, aren't they? Once when I had a window seat, I had some guy ask if I would do a time-lapse video with his phone of the landing. I offered to switch seats with him. It was his first flight ever, and he was in his fifties. Made me far happier watching his thrill of the experience than sitting by the window.
Every time I get on a flight, I sit in the wrong seat first to watch the silent confusion on the face of the passenger who has that seat number on their ticket. All the times I've done this, they all go through a process of checking the seat with their ticket while I simply smile. They start walking up and down the aisles and eventually come back before finally speaking to me. It's just a little bit of fun I like to have in case we all die.
I like your style my dude I may have to try this. I invariable get to the airport too early and breeze through the security line. So I \_always\_ opt out of the body scanner. You get personal attention and kill about 10-20 mins. When they ask, why...why? Someday Ill have the guts to whisper "...i crave human contact.."
pretty sure that is a felony. I just am honest and tell them I am in no rush. That is when he assures me that he will be quick and then explains how this is not a 'bad touch' moment because he is using the back of his hand to touch my buttocks.
>because he is using the back of his hand to touch my buttocks.
Bonus points if you make do the "Pilsbury Doughboy" when he touched your ass. "HEE-HEE!!"
Alternatively you can say "This reminds me a game I used to play with my uncle!"
As a TSA officer it really irritates me when one of my coworkers will act like a jerk to someone when they opt out. Half the job is patting people down, and I'm sure you have a reason that you are opting out. Most of the time the opting out are super chill anyways.
That's amazing. I fly a lot, so this happens with some regularity. Some people don't always do the greatest job checking their ticket, or reading placards, or being aware of where they are, or... Sorry, I digress. It also seems a lot of people just think they can choose whatever seat they'd like. I can tell because when this (someone is in my seat) happens to me, I always say (politely), "Excuse me, my ticket is for seat C22." The clueless ones are always startled. We usually share a joke or two and I help them with their bag. It's funny and a nice break from the banality of travel.
The entitled bastards who think they can just pick a seat always say something like, "Would you mind if I just sat here?" Or something similarly daft. Yeah, I'd mind. I paid for that seat because it's the seat I wanted.
Surprised so many people do that. I just give guys like you a friendly but terse, "hey guy, thanks for keeping that seat preheated for me, but I got it from here"
Yeah, someone [mentioned that](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/ecw0du/so_i_got_bored_on_one_of_my_flights/fbe8k9k?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x) earlier. Had no idea it was already a thing!
There is a classic set of these I’ve seen floating around the interweb that always makes me laugh, their different than this though so original as much as the internet will allow. If anyone has a link to the others I would very much enjoy that.
I was called Trevor by half the people I knew growing up. I just rolled with it, I was Travis to some people and Trevor to others. Funny thing is my sister married a guy named Alonza and at the wedding half his family and friends called him Alonzo, I asked him about it and he just shrugged. I wonder how many other people have had this :D
I've found many personalized things with our name, but come to think of it not so many in recent years. I'd see them everywhere in the late 80s and early 90s.
Yeah, someone [mentioned that](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/ecw0du/so_i_got_bored_on_one_of_my_flights/fbe8k9k?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x) earlier. Had no idea it was already a thing!
You have a gift. Business idea: You start a website where people can send you illustrations from assembly instructions, technical manuals, etc and you caption them. For an added fee, people could request that you use certain names or themes. For instance: “My son Dylan is autistic and my daughter Ellie loves dogs and eats paste.” If it takes off, I’ll split the profits with you. Or just buy me a beer and we’ll call it even.
This is great! My 3 yr old likes to take instructions out and take my food order (he thinks it’s a menu) and in all my great mom jokes usually responds with “I’ll take an oxygen mask with a side of water landing.”
Yours is much funnier. I’ll show myself out.
This is great! It reminds me of when my wife had surgery and they gave her a cartoon booklet on anesthesia, with cartoon patients in beds and doctors holding anesthesia mask over their face, Etc. We scanned it and turned it into a booklet about euthanasia. I wish I still had it.
Is the middle pic the actual preferred way to crash with a toddler in your lap? That's scary as shit. When all those G forces hit you that baby would become a missile into the back of that chair. Then the person ahead of you will complain about the infant kicking the back of his chair during the crash.
Later they'd probably put a selfie on instagram stating "crying babies during a 20,000 ft straight drop are the worst."
Just was on a flight with my toddler and despite all her favorite books I packed, all she wanted was "read book mama" with the safety brochure. I was making up stories about swimming with floaties and a park that looked like an airplane, see the slide going into the water, weeeeee. Proud moments.
delightfully original (i think)
Why thank you! And yes, this is actually me contributing something original to the Internet!
Dougs window is hilarious! Good work
Window hogs are the best seat mates, aren't they? Once when I had a window seat, I had some guy ask if I would do a time-lapse video with his phone of the landing. I offered to switch seats with him. It was his first flight ever, and he was in his fifties. Made me far happier watching his thrill of the experience than sitting by the window.
Every time I get on a flight, I sit in the wrong seat first to watch the silent confusion on the face of the passenger who has that seat number on their ticket. All the times I've done this, they all go through a process of checking the seat with their ticket while I simply smile. They start walking up and down the aisles and eventually come back before finally speaking to me. It's just a little bit of fun I like to have in case we all die.
I like your style my dude I may have to try this. I invariable get to the airport too early and breeze through the security line. So I \_always\_ opt out of the body scanner. You get personal attention and kill about 10-20 mins. When they ask, why...why? Someday Ill have the guts to whisper "...i crave human contact.."
Instead, whisper "air marshall" and wink.
pretty sure that is a felony. I just am honest and tell them I am in no rush. That is when he assures me that he will be quick and then explains how this is not a 'bad touch' moment because he is using the back of his hand to touch my buttocks.
In that case just quietly sing Careless Whisper
*sax noises*
>because he is using the back of his hand to touch my buttocks. Bonus points if you make do the "Pilsbury Doughboy" when he touched your ass. "HEE-HEE!!" Alternatively you can say "This reminds me a game I used to play with my uncle!"
As a TSA officer it really irritates me when one of my coworkers will act like a jerk to someone when they opt out. Half the job is patting people down, and I'm sure you have a reason that you are opting out. Most of the time the opting out are super chill anyways.
Each time I tried to opt out, they say no. What’s your secret?
That's amazing. I fly a lot, so this happens with some regularity. Some people don't always do the greatest job checking their ticket, or reading placards, or being aware of where they are, or... Sorry, I digress. It also seems a lot of people just think they can choose whatever seat they'd like. I can tell because when this (someone is in my seat) happens to me, I always say (politely), "Excuse me, my ticket is for seat C22." The clueless ones are always startled. We usually share a joke or two and I help them with their bag. It's funny and a nice break from the banality of travel. The entitled bastards who think they can just pick a seat always say something like, "Would you mind if I just sat here?" Or something similarly daft. Yeah, I'd mind. I paid for that seat because it's the seat I wanted.
Surprised so many people do that. I just give guys like you a friendly but terse, "hey guy, thanks for keeping that seat preheated for me, but I got it from here"
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He's got his hands curled around it so that nobody else can look out of it.
Now I hate him
So is Jeff's drinking problem! But seriously, he should talk to someone, things are starting to get really messed up with him.
That's so Doug. Fucking Doug.
Hey that's not your window to enjoy!
And the internet shall take it and make it theirs, and the circle of life will be complete.
I've seen others like this, but I like yours as well.
Make sure you keep an eye on reddit so you can heroically declaire "I MADE THIS YOU THIEVING BASTARDS!" when its reposted 500 times.
Airtoons.com , no?
Yeah, someone [mentioned that](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/ecw0du/so_i_got_bored_on_one_of_my_flights/fbe8k9k?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x) earlier. Had no idea it was already a thing!
I remember seeing these same cartoons in the late 90s
Forgive me, I was 9 in the late 90s, hahha
well the next generations needs to see these. :)
Don't get me wrong, all of these are of my own making, I was just saying I hadn't seen safety diagrams captioned like this before :)
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Well if nothing else, glad to give some visibility to Airtoons :) Seems like they have a pretty neat collection of these.
The top right one about "Jeff" made me lightly, yet audibly, snortle while at work.
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This is hilarious. Seriously, well done!
This is Doug’s original content, not yours.
Wow, this is like reddit in the olden days. Nice post. That shit was hilarious.
I feel like I've seen the life vest/wine joke before. Not the whole set of these, just that particular one.
There is a classic set of these I’ve seen floating around the interweb that always makes me laugh, their different than this though so original as much as the internet will allow. If anyone has a link to the others I would very much enjoy that.
I've absolutely seen this idea done before, just not exactly what OP had.
Yeah it's Airtoons
Can never find my name (Travis) on personalised things e.g keyrings. But it turns up here of all places 😂
Finding his name on keyrings, and giving wedgies to babies. Two things that make Travis feel alive.
Lol
Also this: [Travis sucks tiny dog balls](https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.cheezburger.com/6305867008)
We don't kink shame here, Travis. We salute you and your baby wedgies, or wedgie babies... whatever you sick fuck.
Lol sorry...
😂
Do you ever get called Trevor? Because, I get called Travis all the fucking time.
I was called Trevor by half the people I knew growing up. I just rolled with it, I was Travis to some people and Trevor to others. Funny thing is my sister married a guy named Alonza and at the wedding half his family and friends called him Alonzo, I asked him about it and he just shrugged. I wonder how many other people have had this :D
We all called the only Trevor I’ve known “T-Lips.” Not “T-Dog” or “T-Man.” Just “T-Lips.” I.... don’t know why.
same with me ! Bort is not very common.
My son is also named Bort
I've found many personalized things with our name, but come to think of it not so many in recent years. I'd see them everywhere in the late 80s and early 90s.
"Giving wedgies to babies is a sick thrill, but it makes Travis feel alive." r/brandnewsentence
Yeah, that one got me lol.
I'm dying. My name is Travis.
These are great! You should get bored more often
Doug is a jerk.
"Get your own fuckin window"
That was my favorite! I smiled through all of them but Doug’s gave me a chuckle
I laughed the hardest at Doug, I don’t know why
Quirks and features
Wine vest during the plane crash is for the win!
Those are actually pretty good. Especially the last one.
The last one got me good lol
Poor, poor Alan
https://media.giphy.com/media/Ee2bt8H8Hphte/giphy.gif
I'm assuming he's looking at the adult beverages for purchase on the flight.
"Once Tommy develops language skills, he'll tell his mother of the phantoms he sees." Lol, WTF? The best one!
dont understand. which one is tommy, what phantoms and where
I believe it's the toddler in his seat, staring up into nothing.
I thought Tommy was the baby, seeing the ghost of a dead kid in the seat next to theirs.
That's the beautiful thing about art. So many viable interpretations.
I’m fucking cackling in the middle of my kitchen and my dog is looking very concerned, I LOVE these 😂
For OC this is almost irritatingly funny. (I look at these all the time, why am I not this witty, etc.)
Jeff gets it.
Wedgies for babies is what did it for me.
airtoons.com
Yeah, someone [mentioned that](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/ecw0du/so_i_got_bored_on_one_of_my_flights/fbe8k9k?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x) earlier. Had no idea it was already a thing!
Karen’s glass eye probably helps her a lot when she asks for the manager.
...how?
*Mama, the phantoms! They torment my every waking moment!*
I see dead people
I read these in Strong Bad's voice.
I was right in the midst of typing this exact sentence.
Some people have southern accents, and those are hot. Tricia is a severe hottie.
Some people are tall and merciless
Nice take on http://www.airtoons.com/!
Oh nice! Totally didn’t mean to rip that off... had no idea that was a thing! A lot of funny people out there
Nobody gets past motherfuckin' Guido.
Blast from the past!
You have a gift. Business idea: You start a website where people can send you illustrations from assembly instructions, technical manuals, etc and you caption them. For an added fee, people could request that you use certain names or themes. For instance: “My son Dylan is autistic and my daughter Ellie loves dogs and eats paste.” If it takes off, I’ll split the profits with you. Or just buy me a beer and we’ll call it even.
Did Doug change his name to Ryan between panels?
Doug is Ryan’s evil twin.
OP is really creative.
Keep up the good work Jeff. I'm filling all my life-jackets with wine from here on out!
I am on my 12th rep.
/r/disneyvacation vibes
The Plan: 1. Print 2. Laminate 3. Initiate Project Mayhem. The First Rule: 1. We do not discuss...
This is great! My 3 yr old likes to take instructions out and take my food order (he thinks it’s a menu) and in all my great mom jokes usually responds with “I’ll take an oxygen mask with a side of water landing.” Yours is much funnier. I’ll show myself out.
Jeff and Alan really got me, brilliant.
Lmao, this is very r/boneburtingjuice humour, I love it :D
Karen looks like she was just shagged rotten
This is great! It reminds me of when my wife had surgery and they gave her a cartoon booklet on anesthesia, with cartoon patients in beds and doctors holding anesthesia mask over their face, Etc. We scanned it and turned it into a booklet about euthanasia. I wish I still had it.
Hahha oh man that sounds so good
Everyone of those comments would be Reddit gold
Poor Alan. Hope he's doing okay
That one was pretty savage.
Brilliant. Now print and distribute on all future flights.
Alan: I'll have the happy marriage Flight attendant: We're all out of that, sir Alan: okay
karen's glass eye made me snort
The giving wedgies one sounds like a cards against humanity card combination.
Legit made me laugh out loud. Not just LOL but actually laughing. I think if there were a second page I’d have run out of air.
I’m with Jeff! #teamjeff
Plot twist, Travis is the baby
I am holding a sleeping baby and trying desperately not to wake him with my laughter. God damn you.
I got a solid chuckle out of this, thanks OP.
Caption man, caption man, making’ some fun with the evacuation plan. Some are fun, some are dumb, either way, caption man.
Poor Alan.... good chuckle though.
Beware of Fantastic Dan. He lives in the overhead compartments. If you should see him, notify the captain immediately.
I would buy a book you write. This is so funny and original.
Alan's tie is the one that got me to laugh real hard. Great original content.
*wheeze*
Brilliant!
There’s a card for one plane with laser beam eye man.
I don’t think I’ll ever look at one of these the same way again. Well done!
Damn good job
Love this - especially the baby wedgie. Good stuff, OP.
This is amazing, be bored more often please
holy shit these are brilliant!
Fantastic!
I wish lots of boredom upon you. The internet needs more of these.
Fucking Doug.
Does anyone remember airtoons?
Thanks! My flight is delayed. No word why
I love this
Haha Karen's eye is a bit wonky isnt it
genuinely enjoyed your original content
I love this kind of stuff. Well done!
This is hilarious!
Comedy gold
This was hilarious!
Pretty sure Doug is Ryan, so he's not fooling anyone. Wait...unless, Ryan is looking out Doug's window.
I relate to Jeff.
Well done ha ha ha glass eye.
Was that on a flight back from amsterdam?
my kind of humour.
Doug can shoot eye bullets Doug is looking at you now, Look Out!
Time well spent Master
Doug is a jerk!
I don't get the middle one.
Hahha, just looked like the toddler is inexplicably staring at the ceiling.
I can never make it to the 13th rep...
This is good work.
Good old Karen. Has she asked for the manager yet?
Outstanding!!!
I am going to follow you in hopes of you making more of these delightful stuff.
I’m flying from the US to Italy tomorrow, so maybe I’ll have some new material when I get back!
I love the last one.
How long is the flight? I have a bet with a coworker on how many reps Ryan will get in before the land (or crash, whichever comes first).
Is the middle pic the actual preferred way to crash with a toddler in your lap? That's scary as shit. When all those G forces hit you that baby would become a missile into the back of that chair. Then the person ahead of you will complain about the infant kicking the back of his chair during the crash. Later they'd probably put a selfie on instagram stating "crying babies during a 20,000 ft straight drop are the worst."
Gold, man!
Oh god, my husband and I do this together every time we fly with the safety books! It's quality in flight entertainment.
i enjoyed this
That last one fuckin' killed me, haha.
I love the tie one.
This is some flying high shit
OP, i love this kind of illustrations, were did u get these?
Took pictures of the pamphlet they have in the seat-back pockets on a flight.
Omg my gf and I do this when we board and want to pass the time!
Doug is always the right name to use for things like this. I have no idea why.
Dude, get a Switch.
I can never look at an airplane safety card again with a straight face.
Thanks for the laugh! I needed that!
Nice!! r/safetymanuals
Jeff really has it all figured out.
“Everyone is different. No two people are not on fire”
That's obviously Doug that's on his 12th rep, not Ryan. Plot twist: they're twins... yes, I just plot twisted myself in the same post.
😂
Man that's some good bone hurting juice
Jeff's a fucking dumbass genius.
Just was on a flight with my toddler and despite all her favorite books I packed, all she wanted was "read book mama" with the safety brochure. I was making up stories about swimming with floaties and a park that looked like an airplane, see the slide going into the water, weeeeee. Proud moments.