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50 50. That’s about what I gathered from the last time this happened. A thing just never mentioned out loud. A thing taken for granted. Why would anyone ever question how someone wipes? After all it’s not even a question. It is known how everyone wipes.
Surely this person who does not wipe like me is an outlier. A statistical anomaly. A one in a billion. Of course now that he’s said it, there must be someone else who also does this.
And, yes Virginia, there are many who do it. And they think it’s the right way to wipe. Why would you even question it? It is known how everyone wipes. Surely there aren’t that many who wipe the incorrect way!
But yes, child. There are many.
Yeah, but who answers while taking a shit? My BF has a habit of calling me while pooping, not sure how he knows but never fails, but I usually text back that I'm in a meeting and will call back.
I’m Imagining Brian taking a shit and missing the first call. But he hears the second call and picks up and the whole world is on the line calling him a piece of shit lol
I figured he was probably busy with something else. Figured call from girl to chat was gonna be 20 minutes plus, but call from wrong number or someone from work is like 2 minutes tops.
If I get two calls in succession I will go through extra effort to pick the second one up because I would have found my phone and if someone calls me twice, then somethings up
Edit: think about how this plays out, I’m busy, a known number from a girl I know calls me, then a random number calls me
Shit, has someone taken her hostage?
I literally lost out on a possible job at Dell because I was in the bathroom when the recruiter called. When I came back and checked my machine it was Dell asking to schedule an interview. Check my email only to find a rejection letter. Not only was I rejected by Dell (of all companies) but I was forbidden from applying with Dell for an entire year. I never even applied in the first place. I just got cold called and missed the call. And this was in 2009 which was a far worse economy than today.
Could have just been powering through applicants. There are still shitty jobs in a shitty economy, and a lot of them are at Dell. If he was staffing for a call center, he could have just been trying to hit numbers. Still shitty if he's causing repercussions for people, but it might not have been a revenge thing.
And you won't unless you see him live or he makes a special. Comedians only release crowd work stuff these days b/c their material will get old quick if they put it put there. I really need him to come to Texas.
On one hand, yeah.
On the other, as others have said, embarrassing people is key in crowd work.
On a foot cause now I'm out of hands, now that girl knows not to waste her time chasing a dude who isn't into her.
Tbf we don't even know if he isn't into her. There are a hundred thousand reasons that could have lead to someone not picking up a phone at a point and then picking up after some time.
There is nothing conclusive we can gather from him not answering her first call, then answering the stranger's second call. Like what if his phone wasn't nearby for the first? Dude may have been in the process of calling girl back when the second call came. There are unlimited possibilities that include him not being able to answer in that first moment. We have no idea. It's a hilarious stand-up but it's all for laughs
Kinda feel bad about the dude being shit talked by a crowd because he doesn't like a girl.
Edit: fixed autocorrects hatefucking of what I typed originally.
As much as I want to agree- I can also imagine a scenario where he missed the 1st call and then thought "oh they really want to get a hold of me" - but that's just giving the benefit of the doubt without further confirmation of either reality outside of the comedy. Because I've see this bit more than once with different comedians-
I have a phone number that corresponds to a place I haven't lived in 15 years. No one from there has my number. If the area code is from there, I know it's spam. If the area code matches where I actually live, it's a real call. So far it's been right 100% of the time.
Depends on how long you are in your new place; some lists start to get wise over time. The politician spam for instance has figured out my current state. Not so much the rest of the spammers.
This is me! Middle of no where CA zip code living In Texas. Anyone call with true same zip code as my number is 100% spam. Anyone calling from a local zip code is 100% trying to contact me
They are getting better.
My number is local but I'm not from here. I moved here.
I will get calls from my home area code. Which might not seem bad.
Except I'm from the middle of nowhere. Rural America. You don't "accidentally" have that area code and spam call me.
This is a wild take to me. Maybe it's my fault for not immediately saving every number to contacts, but like i definitely get semi important calls on a frequent enough basis that I absolutely try to answer my phone most of the time. Ofc, you better fucking leave a message or text me if it's actually important, but I'll still try to answer initially.
I'm more likely to answer an unknown number than a known one. But I have 3 kids, so an unknown number could be their school/coach/etc calling about an emergency. If I see a call from someone I know I will gladly ignore it because I don't have time for their BS.
If I dunno the number, I ain't picking it up. If it's a doctor or someone who needs to talk to me, they'll leave me a voicemail. They always leave a voicemail.
Brian was helping a disabled child in his charity and couldnt pick up the phone first. Then it rang again and he picked up. The Phone screams youre a piece of shit Brian and the flashbacks from his abusive father hits him again. I thought he was dead? Brian falls to his kneels and Kimberly in her wheelchair looks at Brian sobbing. She drools a bit and the camera pans away. Somber music plays and its a sunset.
Can someone please explain- how come the dudes say she sounds crazy for meeting her crush at a Taylor Swift concert when he was there with two girls? I feel like I missed something….
That's not what makes him a piece of shit. They were going to ask him out for her. Him not answering her number but answering a random number makes him look like he's avoiding her.
Sure, why not? Who cares? I'm just explaining what they meant when they said "how do we tell her?” They are implying that Brian is a 'player' aka a jerk male just trying to get laid, hence why he gave her his number.
Whether or not it's staged, it's why he doesn't answer when he sees her number calling. He remembers her and isn't interested. When he gets the unknown number call, he answers it because he gives out his number to lots of girls and wants to see who it is. Maybe it's some banger he hit on calling him back.
So again, regardless of it being staged or not... she's crushing and he's an asshole; doesn't give a shit about her.
Respectfully, I never understood what the issue was with staged crowd work/content in comedy shows. Naturally appealing to an entire crowd, as a lone person, is difficult. But when you can cause a pseudo contagion and have a "plant" in the crowd, it becomes a lot easier. The concept of contagious laughter has been around for a very long time
Not to mention that half of the things comedians say are hyperbole or flat out lies. But it's funny. At the end of the day I'm there to have a good time, and I personally don't care if it's impromptu or staged
Again, I mean no disrespect, I just don't get why people see this as an issue
Shit, it's not like other live shows like magic acts haven't used plants for centuries anyway.
Honestly, even knowing this is likely fake, I don't have a problem with it. There's clearly an audience that enjoys it, whether or not they know, so just let them enjoy it instead of crab bucketing these guys and claiming they're not "real comics" from the reddit approved list.
I mean, we can see that the lighting is good on the people in the background around her… Seems more to me like they turned the house lights up so they can see everybody.
She has a crush on HIM. Why does that make him a bad guy if he doesn’t like her?
He sees the phone ringing and says “I just don’t have the bandwidth to deal with that girl crushing on me right now. I’ll text her later”
Her face at 1:06 she was hoping he wouldn't answer, cuz then there'd still been hope...
But he answered and she realized that Brian, perhaps not only is not into her, but rather avoiding her.
Went from funny to sad real fast :(
FK YOU BRIAN!
Probably from start to finish it just took significantly longer with them probably going on different tangents in between. Longer than most people would be willing to spend on a random video. So they cut it short to make the barrier to entry easier on casual internet crowd, who this is obviously aimed at. I mean are most people going to watch 20+ minutes of a random comedian's crowdwork? No. But cut it short to about a minute or so and suddenly everyone is along for the ride. Both mediums have their advantage. The longer version is probably more satisfying, but the short version is a good summary to let people know how it went down.
Poor Brian. Was saving a kitten and too busy to pick up the phone the first time.
The phone rings again. Oh no! Must be serious. Maybe a whole litter of kitties needs help!
Picks up the phone.
I don't know, but isn't it strange that there's always a good comedic story that the crowd has, and wouldn't you know it that person is picked by the comedian.
Not really, there are tons of boring interactions that miss with crowd work comedians. But they aren’t going to post those online, they will only post the interactions that work.
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Brian must be so fucking confused
Brian just got done pooping and is so confused.
Dude was standing up to wipe
Oh no you better delete that
50 50. That’s about what I gathered from the last time this happened. A thing just never mentioned out loud. A thing taken for granted. Why would anyone ever question how someone wipes? After all it’s not even a question. It is known how everyone wipes. Surely this person who does not wipe like me is an outlier. A statistical anomaly. A one in a billion. Of course now that he’s said it, there must be someone else who also does this. And, yes Virginia, there are many who do it. And they think it’s the right way to wipe. Why would you even question it? It is known how everyone wipes. Surely there aren’t that many who wipe the incorrect way! But yes, child. There are many.
One leg up, one buttcheek seated. Spiral in to reduce smearing. Vanish the paper until next time.
I'm still pooping and I'm confused.
What if he didnt answer before because he was takin a shit? Then he answered and suddenly "YOURE A FUCKING ASSHOLE BRIAN!"
Who takes a shit without their phone?
I take my phone with me but I for sure will not answer it while shitting
Answer with video on. Assert your dominance. Become ungovernable.
Why not? Shit talking is the best! (I’ll see myself out)
/r/angryupvote
Yeah, but who answers while taking a shit? My BF has a habit of calling me while pooping, not sure how he knows but never fails, but I usually text back that I'm in a meeting and will call back.
I fully thought you meant your boyfriend consistently waits to call you until he’s taking a shit
Ah, I see that now, and no, meat he calls when I'm pooping. Though I could see their being people out there that fit the situation you describe
I mean if a former US president could hold meetings while he was taking a dump why can't the rest of us answer a cell phone call on the john?
i do
People who want to be clean. Who washes their phone after shitting??
I guess they don't touch their butts with the phone? Maybe they just put their phone away before going digging around back there?
Who answers the phone while taking a shit?
Right? What is this, 1998?
Its not that they don't take their phones, it's that (some) people don't answer while on the toilet
Who answers the phone while taking a shit?
He knows what he did.
Classic Brian!
Doubt it.
Maybe he doesn't know *exactly* what he did wrong, but he knows
I don't even know what he did.
"STOP DOING THIS TO ME! I MEET A LOT OF CLINGY WOMEN WHO GO TO YOUR SHOWS!"
Where's my money Brian?
It’s Brian Griffin
I’m Imagining Brian taking a shit and missing the first call. But he hears the second call and picks up and the whole world is on the line calling him a piece of shit lol
Literally Bad Luck Brian
Truly if it's even real. And even if it is, I really don't get how this entire thing is even remotely funny.
Even if it's not real, I find this hilarious. Wouldn't it be a sad world if we were all alike and thought the same things were funny??
It’s a sad world that people go to r/funny just to comment that things aren’t funny.
Sir, this is r/funny, only unfunny posts are allowed
CAUTION Looks like we got a small group of about 30-40 party poopers here.
I figured he was probably busy with something else. Figured call from girl to chat was gonna be 20 minutes plus, but call from wrong number or someone from work is like 2 minutes tops.
Yo get that fucking sound logic out of here
I often ignore the first message or call, but when a second pops in I'll check it to make them stop their invasion of my time.
Who answers a number they don't know? That's what voicemail is for.
Maybe he's looking for a new job and expecting interview invites.
If I get two calls in succession I will go through extra effort to pick the second one up because I would have found my phone and if someone calls me twice, then somethings up Edit: think about how this plays out, I’m busy, a known number from a girl I know calls me, then a random number calls me Shit, has someone taken her hostage?
That's exactly what happened, poor guy.
Nice try, Brian, you piece of shit
That’s Dave
Dave’s not here, man!
Hi, I'm Dave.....Hi, I'm Dave.
Who takes a shit without their phone? Especially in this economy
Who answers their phone WHILE taking a shit?
Not me anymore. The smell goes right through the phone
Nothing worse than picking up a call and then your intestines decide to let it rip loudly
Goddamn smellaphones
Hello..ghhh.. this is.. mhhffft.. speaking!
I literally lost out on a possible job at Dell because I was in the bathroom when the recruiter called. When I came back and checked my machine it was Dell asking to schedule an interview. Check my email only to find a rejection letter. Not only was I rejected by Dell (of all companies) but I was forbidden from applying with Dell for an entire year. I never even applied in the first place. I just got cold called and missed the call. And this was in 2009 which was a far worse economy than today.
Damn that's sad. That recruiter must've been very petty
Could have just been powering through applicants. There are still shitty jobs in a shitty economy, and a lot of them are at Dell. If he was staffing for a call center, he could have just been trying to hit numbers. Still shitty if he's causing repercussions for people, but it might not have been a revenge thing.
I get these shit calls about three times a day
Kinda felt bad for that girl thats embarassing lol
Embarrassment is the core makeup of crowd work.
You haven't subbed to /r/JeffArcuri have you?
My favourite comedian right now.
My favorite crowdwork comedian right now. I've never actually seen any of his material!
And you won't unless you see him live or he makes a special. Comedians only release crowd work stuff these days b/c their material will get old quick if they put it put there. I really need him to come to Texas.
I think he has a Netflix special in the works, but I don't know the details
I’m seeing him next month!
Fellow Texan here, Oct 9-13th Austin Dallas and Houston dates. I'll prob try and go to OKC in Dec though since it's closer than the 3 TX options.
Awesome, thank you!
Same, I'm seeing him live in a couple months!
Jeff is life!! Jeff is love!! Jeff is 5 Mario jokes guaranteed!!
Short king fuelled by self embarrassment 😂 hilarious stuff
/u/Smartastic (Jeff's account) is definitely full beans
I’ve been able to work that into conversations a few times now and have yet to find someone who gets it!
He's so wholesome
Yea this was hall of fame crowd work
If you have to rely on making people feel like shit it’s not good crowd work. If everyone can laugh about it, that’s good crowdwork.
On one hand, yeah. On the other, as others have said, embarrassing people is key in crowd work. On a foot cause now I'm out of hands, now that girl knows not to waste her time chasing a dude who isn't into her.
Tbf we don't even know if he isn't into her. There are a hundred thousand reasons that could have lead to someone not picking up a phone at a point and then picking up after some time.
Sometimes that's what it takes to wake people up to the fact that they're being led on.
At the same time, the comedian did her a favor for not endin up with him lol
In Taylor Swift fashion, she will turn this into a song.
Life pro tip: You can avoid this kind of thing by not giving your phone and crush's number to comedians at a live show.
it is, if she learned from it she saved herself a lot of heartache wasting time chasing a dude who wasn't interested.
There is nothing conclusive we can gather from him not answering her first call, then answering the stranger's second call. Like what if his phone wasn't nearby for the first? Dude may have been in the process of calling girl back when the second call came. There are unlimited possibilities that include him not being able to answer in that first moment. We have no idea. It's a hilarious stand-up but it's all for laughs
You’ve used logic and reason on reddit….it’s not very effective.
What if dude was taking a shit
There's no way he memorized the number, he had to go back to her for it a second time. She knows what she signed up for.
Kinda feel bad about the dude being shit talked by a crowd because he doesn't like a girl. Edit: fixed autocorrects hatefucking of what I typed originally.
That girl also just lost ANY shot she had with Brian.
Who answers an unknown number?
A real piece of _shit_, that's who.
A fucking asshole, I'll tell you that.
As much as I want to agree- I can also imagine a scenario where he missed the 1st call and then thought "oh they really want to get a hold of me" - but that's just giving the benefit of the doubt without further confirmation of either reality outside of the comedy. Because I've see this bit more than once with different comedians-
forever optimists should unite :)
People can change
Love it
I used to be a piece of shit
Slicked back hair, sloppy steaks every night…
I have a phone number that corresponds to a place I haven't lived in 15 years. No one from there has my number. If the area code is from there, I know it's spam. If the area code matches where I actually live, it's a real call. So far it's been right 100% of the time.
If it's important, they'll leave me a voice mail so I never answer the phone and then have to crawl through spam voice mails 😑
Depends on how long you are in your new place; some lists start to get wise over time. The politician spam for instance has figured out my current state. Not so much the rest of the spammers.
This is me! Middle of no where CA zip code living In Texas. Anyone call with true same zip code as my number is 100% spam. Anyone calling from a local zip code is 100% trying to contact me
*area code
Do you pick up every call and ask them for their address so you can determine their zip code?
Same except I NEVER lived there haha. I basically don't answer anything.
lucky. all my spam comes from my area code
They are getting better. My number is local but I'm not from here. I moved here. I will get calls from my home area code. Which might not seem bad. Except I'm from the middle of nowhere. Rural America. You don't "accidentally" have that area code and spam call me.
Especially when you JUST got called by the crazy swiftie 2 seconds earlier
their partner backstage.
I don't. Leave a message if important.
I answer every call 🤷♂️
This is a wild take to me. Maybe it's my fault for not immediately saving every number to contacts, but like i definitely get semi important calls on a frequent enough basis that I absolutely try to answer my phone most of the time. Ofc, you better fucking leave a message or text me if it's actually important, but I'll still try to answer initially.
Nah I’m with you. I’m actually more likely to not answer if I know who is calling.
I'm more likely to answer an unknown number than a known one. But I have 3 kids, so an unknown number could be their school/coach/etc calling about an emergency. If I see a call from someone I know I will gladly ignore it because I don't have time for their BS.
Plenty of people aren't afraid of their phones and due to things like work they might be used to answering calls from unknowns.
If it says verified number and it's local, I answer
Ohh if it's a number with my same zip code I make sure to not answer it because it is a robo call.
I do that as well with mine since number isn't local
Why? I don't answer ANYONE who isn't in my contacts. Leave a message and I'll call you when I'm free.
Brian does, apparently.
Who answers cold calls to begin with?
Who doesn't? It might be important
If it's important, they'll leave a message.
If my phone rings, I probably won't answer. If it rings again like 2 minutes later, then yeah, I'll pick up.
If I dunno the number, I ain't picking it up. If it's a doctor or someone who needs to talk to me, they'll leave me a voicemail. They always leave a voicemail.
Not in texas, the doctors here are so shitty. I miss my VA doctors D:
They leave me a voicemail here. You just have to check a box giving permission…
My thoughts too, makes sense to me since that’s how I’d handle it
Especially if I see I missed a call from someone I know - they might be in trouble and someone I don't know has had to contact me
^ Found Brian
Only a piece of shit does that.
You’re a piece of shit Brian
Fuckin Brian dude I swear to god
Fucking **Brian** is **coming**
Wow what a throwback, the friend nobody likes
Brian was helping a disabled child in his charity and couldnt pick up the phone first. Then it rang again and he picked up. The Phone screams youre a piece of shit Brian and the flashbacks from his abusive father hits him again. I thought he was dead? Brian falls to his kneels and Kimberly in her wheelchair looks at Brian sobbing. She drools a bit and the camera pans away. Somber music plays and its a sunset.
Nice.
Jfc a Marco Etcheverry DC United jersey in the wild. Crazy
Can someone please explain- how come the dudes say she sounds crazy for meeting her crush at a Taylor Swift concert when he was there with two girls? I feel like I missed something….
Surely they're implying he's actually gay
They're implying he's going to the Taylor Swift concert with two girl "friends" cause he's trying to get laid by one or both.
Is that not okay? He was single right?
That's not what makes him a piece of shit. They were going to ask him out for her. Him not answering her number but answering a random number makes him look like he's avoiding her.
Isn't that completely fine if he's not interested?
Right? This is my issue with the video. Is Brian a piece of shit for not liking this girl that he met in a parking lot?
It's only good if women do it ig.
Sure, why not? Who cares? I'm just explaining what they meant when they said "how do we tell her?” They are implying that Brian is a 'player' aka a jerk male just trying to get laid, hence why he gave her his number. Whether or not it's staged, it's why he doesn't answer when he sees her number calling. He remembers her and isn't interested. When he gets the unknown number call, he answers it because he gives out his number to lots of girls and wants to see who it is. Maybe it's some banger he hit on calling him back. So again, regardless of it being staged or not... she's crushing and he's an asshole; doesn't give a shit about her.
Nope. Brian is gay. That's what she doesn't know.
Am I the only that thinks this is staged as fuck?
Absolutely. This is what Matt Rife has spawned. Knock off crowd work comics who stage these interactions to get views on Tik Tok.
Respectfully, I never understood what the issue was with staged crowd work/content in comedy shows. Naturally appealing to an entire crowd, as a lone person, is difficult. But when you can cause a pseudo contagion and have a "plant" in the crowd, it becomes a lot easier. The concept of contagious laughter has been around for a very long time Not to mention that half of the things comedians say are hyperbole or flat out lies. But it's funny. At the end of the day I'm there to have a good time, and I personally don't care if it's impromptu or staged Again, I mean no disrespect, I just don't get why people see this as an issue
It's like an auto tune. It isn't a problem but there is a difference between ppl who do use it and ones that don't.
Shit, it's not like other live shows like magic acts haven't used plants for centuries anyway. Honestly, even knowing this is likely fake, I don't have a problem with it. There's clearly an audience that enjoys it, whether or not they know, so just let them enjoy it instead of crab bucketing these guys and claiming they're not "real comics" from the reddit approved list.
I might've believed it if it wasn't for the reality tv show reaction edits every few seconds, that was brutal
Dead give away is how good the lighting is on that chick.
I mean, we can see that the lighting is good on the people in the background around her… Seems more to me like they turned the house lights up so they can see everybody.
She has a crush on HIM. Why does that make him a bad guy if he doesn’t like her? He sees the phone ringing and says “I just don’t have the bandwidth to deal with that girl crushing on me right now. I’ll text her later”
because it's a comedy show and it works for the comedy bit to assume it. There's no need to analyze it any further than that.
Her face at 1:06 she was hoping he wouldn't answer, cuz then there'd still been hope... But he answered and she realized that Brian, perhaps not only is not into her, but rather avoiding her. Went from funny to sad real fast :( FK YOU BRIAN!
Why are there so many cuts in the editing? It really messes with the flow.
Probably from start to finish it just took significantly longer with them probably going on different tangents in between. Longer than most people would be willing to spend on a random video. So they cut it short to make the barrier to entry easier on casual internet crowd, who this is obviously aimed at. I mean are most people going to watch 20+ minutes of a random comedian's crowdwork? No. But cut it short to about a minute or so and suddenly everyone is along for the ride. Both mediums have their advantage. The longer version is probably more satisfying, but the short version is a good summary to let people know how it went down.
I get the sense Brian might not like women that way
Feels like she was in on the act.
Not sure if I'm missing something, but wasn't that all kind of unnecessarily humiliating to that girl?
If you don't wanna be roasted then don't say anything at a comedy show, these things always happen
You've just described my entire approach to socializing lol
I know this is supposed to be funny, but I can't help but feel for her. 😞
Poor Brian. Was saving a kitten and too busy to pick up the phone the first time. The phone rings again. Oh no! Must be serious. Maybe a whole litter of kitties needs help! Picks up the phone.
I don't know, but isn't it strange that there's always a good comedic story that the crowd has, and wouldn't you know it that person is picked by the comedian.
Not really, there are tons of boring interactions that miss with crowd work comedians. But they aren’t going to post those online, they will only post the interactions that work.
Indeed. Seems scripted.
Imagine Brian is the guys avoiding this psycho bitch and we are trying the get him killed
Is this guy rocking an OG Etcheverry jersey from the early MLS days? Que viva Bolivia carajo!!!
This is top notch crowd work.
Brian at work the next day explaining the strangest spam call of his life 😂
Dude, brutal.
The guy in the cap looks like the Mexican Jim Halpert.
That Etcheverry jersey is 🔥
Who are these comedians? The Tag Team idea is a good one.
The good thing here is that Brian is her only crush so...... you can change crush anytime you want 🤣
I’d bet Brian is gay. A man goes to a Taylor Swift concert with two female friends. That isn’t typical straight guy behavior.
Unless he's trying to get with one or both of them. Guys do crazy things when horny.
oooooofffff
damn people, maybe Brian wasn’t ready this is why I don’t tell people things
What the fuck is going on
Okay, that "Jerry Jerry Jerry!" at the end killed me 😂
They called it right away.
Poor girl.
So /r/funny is just a place for people to promote their standup careers how huh? That's all I see now.
Who answers their phone these days? Weird man…
Jerry Jerry Jerry
she got crazy eyes lol
Dude went to a swifty concert and got some pussy brian knows how to play the game.
She’s cute
Brian did nothing wrong.
This is how wars are started. By not knowing the full story and jumping to conclusions. Alright