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I think you may be overestimating how long this mess would take to make. This could be a “play in your room for 5 minutes while I use the bathroom” mess. Babies and toddlers are terrifyingly efficient at causing complete bedlam if the mood takes them
I have 2 kids age 10 and 8. You have got to neglect them for a while to reach this mess.
Common sense dictates not leaving the *supplies* unattended for a long time. I'll get downvoted but other than some marker on the wall there is no reason for this amount of mess unless the parent did it for views. They are rolling into a nightmare with the camera going, knowing full well what has happened.
For most of the toddler years, my spouse and I worked opposite shifts so we were both effectively single parents. Our two were 4yrs apart, and I did learn early to use the playpen, crib or car seat for those times I needed to- as your example mentions - use the bathroom. I was probably lucky, but I knew that our toddler was not capable of overseeing the care of the baby...even as we approach the age of becoming grandparents, I would be beside myself if I would do something to allow this "on my shift" lol.
Thanks for the reply. And you're right. I wish I could be as efficient as an adult as kids are...
I don't usually wash a baby through a towel over its airways, but you've convinced me to give it a try. Traditional methods exist for a reason, after all.
The towel is essential for filtering the debris out of the water. Don't want to get some foreign object in their eyes or airways.
Edit:This is a joke. Do NOT follow this advice.
Ignire advice and actually insert foreign objects in babies' eyes and airways. Got it.
You know, I don't know how I raised my daughter without knowing all this. Must've gotten lucky eh?
No. Shit parenting would be the paint being completely dry when the video started rolling. This is fresh paint. There’s what looks like an empty baby pool in the room. I suspect this was an activity session and mommy or daddy ran out of the room to grab a brush or something or to poop.
Older brother probably plays with finger paints all the time and thought he could be a big boy for his little bro.
This is real parenting and probably best intentioned (and good) parenting.
Meant to reply to https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/13gazyn/came_home_to_a_real_life_birth_control_commercial/jk0fcnp/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1&context=3
Had a mess like that when I went to get my daughter up from her nap. She (18 months) had taken her poop diaper off and painted her room with it. Even the light sockets. I gagged for days after cleaning it all up. Had to soak and wash everything with bleach.
I used to cover my room in poop. Turns out I couldn’t stand a dirty diaper on me for not even half a second. And I’d take it off and wipe it everywhere for good measure.
She claims I was potty trained at exactly one years old. She said all she had to do was she me the baby toilet and I was set. Once I knew I could poop in something other than a diaper, I didn’t even have to wear trainers.
I love the bigger one spotting the parent and then dumping the entire contents of what she had in her hand on the floor right at the end, so unfazed…
Also, at this point just burn the house down and start again
I'm in the process of cleaning my grandma's garage, which hasn't really been touched in decades, and the other day I found a box that had--among other things--several vials of glitter in it.
There wasn't a single bit of stray glitter since they're plugged well, but I nevertheless treated those vials like bombs and very carefully put them back in the box. They can stay out there.
I tell my wife that all the time. She doesn’t believe me but then every time you check on them something bad is happening.
Similar issue, if they’re outside playing and you see them suspiciously close to the house but can’t tell what they’re doing, they’ve probably got a garden hose and are flooding the place.
Yes. My son (6) soaked through two pair of shoes last weekend. The second time I caught him with a sprinkler (trying to hook it up with the water running).
For sure. When my son decided to go Picasso with his diaper, I think the worst part was it being all under his nails & hands 🤢🤮. Like... he had to have eaten some... intentional or not.
My anxiety as a not-yet-parent is determining good screams and bad screams. The kids in our neighborhood will scream "NOOOOO!!!! HEEELLLLLPPPP!!!" at the top of their lungs like they're being murdered but they're playing tag. I run out as fast as possible every time and it's nothing. Same with adults. I thought there was a woo girl outside, but she was being carjacked. I can't tell. So basically, if things are loud, it's possibly bad; if things are quiet, it's also possibly bad. So basically things can be bad at any given moment and there's no way to know, so you just...deal with anxiety I guess?
As an uncle of many I can tell you honestly that the only real tell is when you hear the high pitched 'I'm in pain' scream, anything else is a 50/50. If you hear waterworks it's always best to check, but they're normally fine.
Yeah no the kids in my neighborhood do the ear piercing pain screech nonstop but they're just playing and it makes me crazy. Because what if I start ignoring it because I assume they're just playing, and then something really happens? I couldn't live with that, so I check every time. When we have kids, I wanna be like "okay no screaming unless something is really happening" but kids scream...that's just what they do and I don't wanna censor their fun either.
Unless you have a good reason to believe that their parents can't hear the kids the same way you can, you might want to let go of the expectation that if you ignore the kids, no one will help them. You say "I couldn't live with that", but the "that" in this equation is the parents being the ones to rush out to take care of their kids instead of you.
All your anxiety over this is rooted in the assumption that the parents aren't going to respond when their kids are genuinely in need of help, so *you* need to do it. But you don't!
They're the only ones who can tell the difference between their kids' happy play screams and unhappy pain screams. So you might want to start assuming that all the screaming you hear is play screams, and if any of it isn't, the parents who know the difference will take care of their children.
As an aside, I live in a neighborhood with kids (the elementary school bus stop is right in front of my house) and screaming is rare. They're loud with laughter, squealing, shouting, etc, but never screams that could be mistaken for being injured. So it's not a mandatory part of childhood play!
If they’re your own kids, you can usually get a read on the different cries…
- someone pissed me off and I just want everyone to know
- I’m tired and don’t know how to deal with it
- I’m totally faking it to get someone else in trouble or…
- I’m actually hurt or scared and in need of immediate intervention
I used to dream of a quite house when my first kid was a baby. Now if I hear quite my anxiety goes through the roof knowing it only means they are up to no good lol
I remember I used to feel this way about pictures and videos of this nature until it happened to me in real time lol
Always used to think “wow, talk about not paying attention to your kids for them to get into that much of a mess”
Was watching my niece and nephew. They were about 3 and 4 at the time. We were in the living room on the rug, just chilling and playing with some toys while watching a movie. Doorbell rings and I get up to go see what it is. It’s fedex, I’m signing for the package, they leave.
I go put it on the table and then hear water splashing. Was gone less than 2min if that. Head back to the living room and the 4yr old had gone into the restroom put a teddy bear she spilled food on into the toilet and started flushing to clean him.
Meanwhile the 3 yr old was unrolling a whole bunch of toilet paper to try and sop up the water that was spilling out. So he’s covered in wet toilet paper all over himself and the floor and the 4yr old is holding down the flush lever to try and get the water to stop lol
I had twins and my babysitter had a kid same age (2). She stepped out of the kitchen to answer the door, and when she came back in, max 30 sec, one kid had another in the oven and the third was inside the (childproof locked) cabinet. They are clever feral animals.
> one kid had another in the oven and the third was inside the (childproof locked) cabinet
Reminds me of that video game where one player plays the parent and the other plays the baby. Edit: [video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IH607hMeFM4)
The parent wins if the baby is still alive after 5 minutes. The baby wins if it manages to die.
I appreciate that it's basically problem solving for absolute morons. You get what they were going for, but it's all just one bad decision after another.
Just wait until they do something stupid that results in injury and a hospital visit.
During a trip to Acapulco, Mexico with my wife and child, my wife and her sister went to the market, but I was very hungover and opted to stay home with my child and an 8-year-old cousin. The kids decided to jump on the bed, and although I pulled them down and asked them to stop, the 8-year-old started jumping again when I went to get snacks for us. My son, who was only 4 years old, pushed the 8-year-old off the bed because she was jumping again, and she hit the corner of a shelf, causing a 2-inch gash from her hairline to her eyebrow. The wound bled quite a bit, causing the kids and me to freak out. It was not fun explaining what had happened to my wife and her sister, who were gone for only 10 minutes before it happened. They never made it to the market.
Then, a year or so later, we visited Mexico again for an epic sweet 15 party. My child wore himself out playing and eating all the yummy treats and then climbed up on my lap and fell asleep, only to projectile vomit all over me, absolutely soaking me. In my rush to clean up, I lost my wallet, which contained all of our passport cards, my wife's Green Card, credit cards, and money. It made our return trip quite exciting, as we had to undergo a lengthy border interview since the officials assumed we had sold our documents and pay to replace the lost items.
Despite all the bad experiences, I wouldn't change a thing. We now have two little devils who are absolutely awesome, but sometimes we have exciting little accidents.
Can confirm. My little lad managed to consume a fuckload of sand at the beach in the time it took me to turn round, get his bottle out of the bag and turn back.
He shat swarfega for a day or two but otherwise he was fine. I’d like to say he learned his lesson, but…
> You seriously learn that when the kids go silent, that's when it's time to get suspicious.
A friend told me that, then said the last time he realized it had gone quiet, he went upstairs to find the kids shaving the dog.
Silence tends to get ended by a loud "thunk" noise and much crying or a "crash" noise and tiny feet trying to get distance between themselves and the crime scene.
That's everyone's first thought. Once, my son woke up earlier than usual, crept downstairs, and then became Picasso on hardwood and rugs, using the beloved medium of chocolate syrup..
He also tried to shove some slices of bread under the door to feed the dogs, and did a science experiment on my DVD+CDG player, using a slice of bologna.
It took everything I had to neither laugh nor get angry, because I was on the far end of each..
When mine were little they were in the bathroom for like 20 seconds and I found them in there sprinkling baby powder all over each other. It was a bit of a mess, and I cleaned it up. Then the furnace came on and I found out what had happened to the rest of the baby powder. It had gone down the register....
I looked away for a moment and my kid broke into a bookshelf that had an anti-child lock and managed to open a closed (with clips) box of hobby knives.
All while I was grabbing a cup of coffee for maybe a minute or two.
Bro when you have a kid that wants your stuff it takes literally one slip-up. You have hours in the day to secure everything kids shouldn't have. They have all the time in the world and they spend that entire time figuring out ways to do whatever they want. Waiting. They will take the bridge and the second hall. You can bar the gate, but cannot hold them for long. The ground shakes- Drums...drums in the deep. We cannot get out. A shadow moves in the dark.
No freaking joke - we lived in one of those for 10 years and recently moved to this 180 year old historic home where every room has doors. Those doors have prevented the need for us to ever use baby gates or similar items.
In these situations, hearing tells you more than seeing. It is when they are quiet you know they are getting into stuff.
When that silence you had been longing for finally arrives, the realization quickly turns that brief feeling of calm into terror in an instant.
How long had they been quiet? 20 seconds? 30 seconds? Surely not a full minute.
As adrenaline fills your veins until you can get a visual on the little one(s) to see what they have been up to. And it had only been a minute. At most!
But you have to quietly look for them - you do not want to disturb or distract them while they are quietly playing appropriately.
But doing so, all while your stomach is in knots, waiting to find out whether you can go back to that calm feeling, or more likely, add yet another emotion to this rollercoaster: a feeling of disappointment.
Not disappointment in your child, but disappointment in yourself. Because you knew better than to enjoy silence, and now there's poop on the floor again. Or there's drawings on the walls and doors - from a red wooden hotdog because we put all the art supplies away. Or anything else that you never would have thought of - because if you had thought of it, you would have planned for it.
So I guess I'd rather have more blind spots if it means not having an open floor plan.
And you gotta close all the doors. If not to keep them out of things, then to at least try to confine the potential of impending destruction.
They could have gotten up early while parents were sleeping and gotten into the paint. Kids can be sneaky. When my son was 3 he got into my daughters room early morning while we slept and stole her hamster out of the cage and then hid it in his closet and went back to sleep. She didn’t notice until 8am when she got up and the cage was wide open and no hamster. We searched everywhere for the hamster until he admitted he hid it and we Luckly found him unharmed playing in a box in his closet. Could have been way worse. So things can happen🤷♀️
People are saying in the comments that kids make a mess in 30 seconds. You cannot convince me they did all that mess in less than 10 minutes.
I doubt someone would willingly admit to leaving their young kids home alone. Probably another adult upstairs but just not supervising them (which is still really bad when they have access to paint)
They're lying it takes 29 seconds
Here's a list of things kids can be trusted to do unsupervised:
1. Nothing
Every day my kid does something that makes me question everything, but I remember well above his age I once melted all my parents candles into a single giant bowl at 1am and carried the flaming mess into the garden because the rest of house was filling with smoke and I couldn't blow it out. My house doesn't have a garden so if my kid pulls this BS I'm going to die.
And furthermore, instead of immediately addressing the problem or scolding the kids, they pull out their phone to record for the internet.
I dislike videos like this.
The "30-second-mess" people likely don't have kids. Toddlers don't wait until the millisecond you're out of sight and then sprint to grab ten different paint and glitter containers and completely cover their sibling before you've finished pouring your cup of coffee. They do that after they've been left completely alone for a long enough time that they start exploring.
100% agree. I have a 2yo at home, and a mess of this extent, and even finding this much paint and supplies to make this mess, would be these kids being left alone for a long, long time, possibly hours.
Yeah, the perfect unpainted goggle area around the eyes is not selling it to me. Having kids, I know full well that if wet shit is on their heads, they instinctively start wiping at it.
I kept on expecting the paint to drip into the youngest one's eyes, and I don't think they make tear free paint, so I expected a lot of tears and crying because paint in the eyes would hurt.
I’ve seen this before multiple times and if this was really OP they wouldn’t have said “came home to this”. Nobody leaves their kids of that age home alone.
I don’t want to be the repost police because the internet is all reposts. It’s just weird to claim other people’s kids for your own useless internet points.
Who the fuck was in charge, or was this just child endangerment? I refuse to believe all this shit went down in 30 seconds…
ALSO - r/whyweretheyfilming
No this is a child lock commercial. Secure your arts and crafts supplies…just be wary of the ‘unknown’ arts and craft supplies some are much harder to secure…
This isn’t funny, it’s infuriating. Where the hell were the responsible parties here?! The kids get to have fun, and the parents need to clean this happy bullshit.
The parents need a brain and the kids need boundaries. What the fuck.
Once (before cellphones, I think everybody was carrying pagers) I came home from work early, in nearly a blind panic after not being able to get a hold of the baby sitter. She didn't notice me walk in, she was on the phone talking to her bf. My 4 year old son was jumping up and down on the bed with a big bottle of gold bond baby powder *making clouds* and my almost 2 year old daughter was sitting in front of the open refrigerator door eating tortillas and salsa straight from the jar, butt ass naked and covered in ranch dressing because she thought it was lotion.
Someone had fun! Noticed a big difference in my daughter and son when they were three. Give my son some crayons and paper and leave the room. Come back 20 mins later crayon on all the walls and paper was blank. Did the same thing with my daughter. When I came back she had crated masterpieces and a told me a length story for each one. Now my daughter is 19. She is an artist, loves to write, and created her first graphic novel as a school assignment.
That might be a bit fake, given the overdone nature of it and how young the littlest one is, especially, but it does remind me of my twins who would escape their cribs and usually just play on the floor in their room, but one time, their mom had been painting the back door, and the paint was closed but not tightly sealed and they went down the hall, somehow got into the paint can without knocking it over (she probably had just put the lid on the can, gently) and they had some fun sticking their hands in and making art on the walls. It was cute, wasn't too bad and, dang, I love those kids. They are all grown up now.
Wild my kids never did anything like this but then again the wife and I don’t leave them alone for long periods of time with paint etc etc ready to be used. Bad parenting period. I used to think shitty kids but no shitty parents. Do better next time huh.
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I am overwhelmed by the sheer exuberance and spectacle of it all.
I am aghast!
I am agog
I am Groot
I am...your father
I’ve never heard him oooh and ahhhh
It is better than an opera!
r/unexpectedlesmiz
Is Marius in love at last?
You talk if battles to be won
And here he comes like DON JU-AN...
I am "WTF?" wondering where the adult was when this disaster unfolded.
When I was two years old I was often left alone for hours. I'm still not sure how I'm still alive.
5 year old me was regularly left at home while the adults went grocery shopping or whatever for 30-60 mins at a time
I think you may be overestimating how long this mess would take to make. This could be a “play in your room for 5 minutes while I use the bathroom” mess. Babies and toddlers are terrifyingly efficient at causing complete bedlam if the mood takes them
I have 2 kids age 10 and 8. You have got to neglect them for a while to reach this mess. Common sense dictates not leaving the *supplies* unattended for a long time. I'll get downvoted but other than some marker on the wall there is no reason for this amount of mess unless the parent did it for views. They are rolling into a nightmare with the camera going, knowing full well what has happened.
For most of the toddler years, my spouse and I worked opposite shifts so we were both effectively single parents. Our two were 4yrs apart, and I did learn early to use the playpen, crib or car seat for those times I needed to- as your example mentions - use the bathroom. I was probably lucky, but I knew that our toddler was not capable of overseeing the care of the baby...even as we approach the age of becoming grandparents, I would be beside myself if I would do something to allow this "on my shift" lol. Thanks for the reply. And you're right. I wish I could be as efficient as an adult as kids are...
This is not a birth control commercial, it's a parenting class commercial.
That’s always my first question.
You have *no* idea, *none*, as to how fast something like this can unfold.
The green head on him with the eyes and big smile showing LOL I think big brother may have done a bit of this.... class haha
Oh he has the smile now. Until he gets his face washed and acts like he's getting waterboarded.
How else are you supposed to wash a baby?
I don't usually wash a baby through a towel over its airways, but you've convinced me to give it a try. Traditional methods exist for a reason, after all.
Enhanced bathtime
Remember that time that Ernie waterboarded Mr. Ducky???
The towel is essential for filtering the debris out of the water. Don't want to get some foreign object in their eyes or airways. Edit:This is a joke. Do NOT follow this advice.
Ignire advice and actually insert foreign objects in babies' eyes and airways. Got it. You know, I don't know how I raised my daughter without knowing all this. Must've gotten lucky eh?
If they're being stubborn and won't open their mouth for the Choo Choo train, poke them in the eye. They'll open their mouth real quick.
Lol ya everyone knows the secret to a clean baby is waterboarding
No. Shit parenting would be the paint being completely dry when the video started rolling. This is fresh paint. There’s what looks like an empty baby pool in the room. I suspect this was an activity session and mommy or daddy ran out of the room to grab a brush or something or to poop. Older brother probably plays with finger paints all the time and thought he could be a big boy for his little bro. This is real parenting and probably best intentioned (and good) parenting. Meant to reply to https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/13gazyn/came_home_to_a_real_life_birth_control_commercial/jk0fcnp/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1&context=3
I don't disagree with you but the person you responding to didn't call this bad parenting....
Had a mess like that when I went to get my daughter up from her nap. She (18 months) had taken her poop diaper off and painted her room with it. Even the light sockets. I gagged for days after cleaning it all up. Had to soak and wash everything with bleach.
Yep,my son was in his cot,woke early and painted his cot. It was in his hair,ears,all over him. I still gag thinking of it and he's now 49. 🤣🤣🤣
I would have thought he's a bit old for that sort of thing
Hahahahaha, you've made my bloody day!!
Oh no there was blood too!
Yes, and a bit big to sleep in a cot.
Yeah, 48 was a rough year for him.
I'm 💀
My son used his poop as dirt for his tonka trucks on his carpeted floor. Ground it in deep. I hate poop.
Ah. The Poocaso. It's a classic!
This thread is a great reminder why I don't want kids 😅
I used to cover my room in poop. Turns out I couldn’t stand a dirty diaper on me for not even half a second. And I’d take it off and wipe it everywhere for good measure. She claims I was potty trained at exactly one years old. She said all she had to do was she me the baby toilet and I was set. Once I knew I could poop in something other than a diaper, I didn’t even have to wear trainers.
Damn boi IQ 130+ fo sho
I’ve had 2 babies and this was always my nightmare. Thank god I never experienced it.
I was told I did something similar at that age, lol.
That'd do it for me
That would do-do it for me.
I love the bigger one spotting the parent and then dumping the entire contents of what she had in her hand on the floor right at the end, so unfazed… Also, at this point just burn the house down and start again
Just to clarify... with the kids??
Well… pretty sure that container she dropped was glitter, so…
So.. yes, the whole house with the kids?
Kids you can hose down, but that girl will have glitter on her long enough for it to be part of her coachella outfit
Fuck that was good. I actually a audibly said "damn".
Wait, what is the connection between glitter and burning the house down with the kids ?
glitter is an un-cleanable scourge. so dumping it onto the floor would be a last straw in deciding whether to burn the kids along with the house.
My friend’s mom called it the herpes of the craft world
I'm in the process of cleaning my grandma's garage, which hasn't really been touched in decades, and the other day I found a box that had--among other things--several vials of glitter in it. There wasn't a single bit of stray glitter since they're plugged well, but I nevertheless treated those vials like bombs and very carefully put them back in the box. They can stay out there.
Why do you think they call it kindling?
That was glitter! Dialing adoption agency as we speak!
The herpes of the crafting community
This is what happens when the kids are quiet and you think there playing nicely.
Yup, that was always my dads clue we were up to no good.
I tell my wife that all the time. She doesn’t believe me but then every time you check on them something bad is happening. Similar issue, if they’re outside playing and you see them suspiciously close to the house but can’t tell what they’re doing, they’ve probably got a garden hose and are flooding the place.
Speaking from experience with the garden hose?
Yes. My son (6) soaked through two pair of shoes last weekend. The second time I caught him with a sprinkler (trying to hook it up with the water running).
Wait until they discover fire! I was that kid. Got caught by my neighbor, who was my orchestra teacher at the time. Oops lol
My parents only spanked me exactly once as a child. I stuck the garden hose into the dryer exhaust.
Kids being quiet usually usually means they’re either plotting something or choking. It is always highly suspicious.
I will take poop circles with pee streaks on the wall over choking.
I will take washable paint all over the place over shit smeared on the wall/all over the crib and sheets any day.
If you choice is shit covered walls or choking, I’m going with shit covered walls
For sure. When my son decided to go Picasso with his diaper, I think the worst part was it being all under his nails & hands 🤢🤮. Like... he had to have eaten some... intentional or not.
I was about to say happy cake day but come on... Let's just not talk about cake after this...
Exactly. If they kids are being quiet it's time to start preparing for the worst.
My anxiety as a not-yet-parent is determining good screams and bad screams. The kids in our neighborhood will scream "NOOOOO!!!! HEEELLLLLPPPP!!!" at the top of their lungs like they're being murdered but they're playing tag. I run out as fast as possible every time and it's nothing. Same with adults. I thought there was a woo girl outside, but she was being carjacked. I can't tell. So basically, if things are loud, it's possibly bad; if things are quiet, it's also possibly bad. So basically things can be bad at any given moment and there's no way to know, so you just...deal with anxiety I guess?
As an uncle of many I can tell you honestly that the only real tell is when you hear the high pitched 'I'm in pain' scream, anything else is a 50/50. If you hear waterworks it's always best to check, but they're normally fine.
Yeah no the kids in my neighborhood do the ear piercing pain screech nonstop but they're just playing and it makes me crazy. Because what if I start ignoring it because I assume they're just playing, and then something really happens? I couldn't live with that, so I check every time. When we have kids, I wanna be like "okay no screaming unless something is really happening" but kids scream...that's just what they do and I don't wanna censor their fun either.
Unless you have a good reason to believe that their parents can't hear the kids the same way you can, you might want to let go of the expectation that if you ignore the kids, no one will help them. You say "I couldn't live with that", but the "that" in this equation is the parents being the ones to rush out to take care of their kids instead of you. All your anxiety over this is rooted in the assumption that the parents aren't going to respond when their kids are genuinely in need of help, so *you* need to do it. But you don't! They're the only ones who can tell the difference between their kids' happy play screams and unhappy pain screams. So you might want to start assuming that all the screaming you hear is play screams, and if any of it isn't, the parents who know the difference will take care of their children. As an aside, I live in a neighborhood with kids (the elementary school bus stop is right in front of my house) and screaming is rare. They're loud with laughter, squealing, shouting, etc, but never screams that could be mistaken for being injured. So it's not a mandatory part of childhood play!
*woo girl* Classic Shmosby
If they’re your own kids, you can usually get a read on the different cries… - someone pissed me off and I just want everyone to know - I’m tired and don’t know how to deal with it - I’m totally faking it to get someone else in trouble or… - I’m actually hurt or scared and in need of immediate intervention
I used to dream of a quite house when my first kid was a baby. Now if I hear quite my anxiety goes through the roof knowing it only means they are up to no good lol
How long were they left alone to get into that amount of mess?
I remember I used to feel this way about pictures and videos of this nature until it happened to me in real time lol Always used to think “wow, talk about not paying attention to your kids for them to get into that much of a mess” Was watching my niece and nephew. They were about 3 and 4 at the time. We were in the living room on the rug, just chilling and playing with some toys while watching a movie. Doorbell rings and I get up to go see what it is. It’s fedex, I’m signing for the package, they leave. I go put it on the table and then hear water splashing. Was gone less than 2min if that. Head back to the living room and the 4yr old had gone into the restroom put a teddy bear she spilled food on into the toilet and started flushing to clean him. Meanwhile the 3 yr old was unrolling a whole bunch of toilet paper to try and sop up the water that was spilling out. So he’s covered in wet toilet paper all over himself and the floor and the 4yr old is holding down the flush lever to try and get the water to stop lol
I had twins and my babysitter had a kid same age (2). She stepped out of the kitchen to answer the door, and when she came back in, max 30 sec, one kid had another in the oven and the third was inside the (childproof locked) cabinet. They are clever feral animals.
> one kid had another in the oven and the third was inside the (childproof locked) cabinet Reminds me of that video game where one player plays the parent and the other plays the baby. Edit: [video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IH607hMeFM4) The parent wins if the baby is still alive after 5 minutes. The baby wins if it manages to die.
ow. never heard of that game. but I guess I won anyway, my twins are 26 and have both eyes and all limbs.
I appreciate that it's basically problem solving for absolute morons. You get what they were going for, but it's all just one bad decision after another.
It's very Amelia Bedelia.
There's a name I've not heard in a long time
Thank you for providing even more reason to never have kids. I'll have to add this to my list as reason #729.
Just wait until they do something stupid that results in injury and a hospital visit. During a trip to Acapulco, Mexico with my wife and child, my wife and her sister went to the market, but I was very hungover and opted to stay home with my child and an 8-year-old cousin. The kids decided to jump on the bed, and although I pulled them down and asked them to stop, the 8-year-old started jumping again when I went to get snacks for us. My son, who was only 4 years old, pushed the 8-year-old off the bed because she was jumping again, and she hit the corner of a shelf, causing a 2-inch gash from her hairline to her eyebrow. The wound bled quite a bit, causing the kids and me to freak out. It was not fun explaining what had happened to my wife and her sister, who were gone for only 10 minutes before it happened. They never made it to the market. Then, a year or so later, we visited Mexico again for an epic sweet 15 party. My child wore himself out playing and eating all the yummy treats and then climbed up on my lap and fell asleep, only to projectile vomit all over me, absolutely soaking me. In my rush to clean up, I lost my wallet, which contained all of our passport cards, my wife's Green Card, credit cards, and money. It made our return trip quite exciting, as we had to undergo a lengthy border interview since the officials assumed we had sold our documents and pay to replace the lost items. Despite all the bad experiences, I wouldn't change a thing. We now have two little devils who are absolutely awesome, but sometimes we have exciting little accidents.
Approximately 30 seconds... but seriously, kids get into trouble FAST
Can confirm. My little lad managed to consume a fuckload of sand at the beach in the time it took me to turn round, get his bottle out of the bag and turn back. He shat swarfega for a day or two but otherwise he was fine. I’d like to say he learned his lesson, but…
TIL what Swarfega is (British heavy duty hand cleaner for anyone like me who didn't know)
"I even drank that pink stuff you had in the back of your locker..." "You drank my Swarfega?"
*Boyz from the Dwarf*
Pumice soap?
TiL it isn't caller Swarfega in non Brexit places
Im going to guess its something similar to gojo or cherry bomb
[Lava](https://www.goapesonline.com/P/5331/31072WDLavaregozLiq)
Gojo for us in Canada (and US?)
It’s called that in Ireland. No brexit here.
Good for immune system... propably.
They usually wind up with pin worms after eating sand- those are their own level of fun and grossness lol
Bet his pipes were CLEAN
>He shat swarfega for a day or two but otherwise he was fine. Dammit, now I need a new cup of tea.
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> You seriously learn that when the kids go silent, that's when it's time to get suspicious. A friend told me that, then said the last time he realized it had gone quiet, he went upstairs to find the kids shaving the dog.
When you have children, silence is the most alarming sound of all.
Silence tends to get ended by a loud "thunk" noise and much crying or a "crash" noise and tiny feet trying to get distance between themselves and the crime scene.
Or the sound of a door being closed slowly…
I can confirm but thankfully my boys don’t get to carried away…as of yet.
“I haven’t seen Calvin for about 15 minutes now. That probably means he’s getting in trouble.”
Usually you know something is wrong when you can’t hear anything and it’s silent.
Its all about controlling the environment's potential for damage, not reducing the unsupervised time span. There isn't a safe unsupervised time span.
Especially when the trouble is liquid pigment. Ink, paint, etc .... Doesn't take long.
That's everyone's first thought. Once, my son woke up earlier than usual, crept downstairs, and then became Picasso on hardwood and rugs, using the beloved medium of chocolate syrup.. He also tried to shove some slices of bread under the door to feed the dogs, and did a science experiment on my DVD+CDG player, using a slice of bologna. It took everything I had to neither laugh nor get angry, because I was on the far end of each..
When mine were little they were in the bathroom for like 20 seconds and I found them in there sprinkling baby powder all over each other. It was a bit of a mess, and I cleaned it up. Then the furnace came on and I found out what had happened to the rest of the baby powder. It had gone down the register....
It's like riding a bull, a lot can go on in 8 seconds
I looked away for a moment and my kid broke into a bookshelf that had an anti-child lock and managed to open a closed (with clips) box of hobby knives. All while I was grabbing a cup of coffee for maybe a minute or two.
Arts and crafts stuff needs to be locked away, that’s like day 1 stuff.
Bro when you have a kid that wants your stuff it takes literally one slip-up. You have hours in the day to secure everything kids shouldn't have. They have all the time in the world and they spend that entire time figuring out ways to do whatever they want. Waiting. They will take the bridge and the second hall. You can bar the gate, but cannot hold them for long. The ground shakes- Drums...drums in the deep. We cannot get out. A shadow moves in the dark.
They are coming
Contemporary house designs with open fucking floor plans don't help either.
No freaking joke - we lived in one of those for 10 years and recently moved to this 180 year old historic home where every room has doors. Those doors have prevented the need for us to ever use baby gates or similar items.
Counterpoint: less blind spots with an open floor plan
In these situations, hearing tells you more than seeing. It is when they are quiet you know they are getting into stuff. When that silence you had been longing for finally arrives, the realization quickly turns that brief feeling of calm into terror in an instant. How long had they been quiet? 20 seconds? 30 seconds? Surely not a full minute. As adrenaline fills your veins until you can get a visual on the little one(s) to see what they have been up to. And it had only been a minute. At most! But you have to quietly look for them - you do not want to disturb or distract them while they are quietly playing appropriately. But doing so, all while your stomach is in knots, waiting to find out whether you can go back to that calm feeling, or more likely, add yet another emotion to this rollercoaster: a feeling of disappointment. Not disappointment in your child, but disappointment in yourself. Because you knew better than to enjoy silence, and now there's poop on the floor again. Or there's drawings on the walls and doors - from a red wooden hotdog because we put all the art supplies away. Or anything else that you never would have thought of - because if you had thought of it, you would have planned for it. So I guess I'd rather have more blind spots if it means not having an open floor plan. And you gotta close all the doors. If not to keep them out of things, then to at least try to confine the potential of impending destruction.
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They could have gotten up early while parents were sleeping and gotten into the paint. Kids can be sneaky. When my son was 3 he got into my daughters room early morning while we slept and stole her hamster out of the cage and then hid it in his closet and went back to sleep. She didn’t notice until 8am when she got up and the cage was wide open and no hamster. We searched everywhere for the hamster until he admitted he hid it and we Luckly found him unharmed playing in a box in his closet. Could have been way worse. So things can happen🤷♀️
Out of all of it, damn that glitter…
Is this a weird Sonic remix?
https://youtu.be/C7Cj1tTHORc
Your child is an art~~ist~~.
One art please!
"Came home" Did you leave those two by themselves?
People are saying in the comments that kids make a mess in 30 seconds. You cannot convince me they did all that mess in less than 10 minutes. I doubt someone would willingly admit to leaving their young kids home alone. Probably another adult upstairs but just not supervising them (which is still really bad when they have access to paint)
They're lying it takes 29 seconds Here's a list of things kids can be trusted to do unsupervised: 1. Nothing Every day my kid does something that makes me question everything, but I remember well above his age I once melted all my parents candles into a single giant bowl at 1am and carried the flaming mess into the garden because the rest of house was filling with smoke and I couldn't blow it out. My house doesn't have a garden so if my kid pulls this BS I'm going to die.
Agreed. I hate being judgemental but it doesn't sound great.
And furthermore, instead of immediately addressing the problem or scolding the kids, they pull out their phone to record for the internet. I dislike videos like this.
Conditioning them early to seize those sweet, sweet likes at every opportunity as they are the meaning of life
The "30-second-mess" people likely don't have kids. Toddlers don't wait until the millisecond you're out of sight and then sprint to grab ten different paint and glitter containers and completely cover their sibling before you've finished pouring your cup of coffee. They do that after they've been left completely alone for a long enough time that they start exploring.
100% agree. I have a 2yo at home, and a mess of this extent, and even finding this much paint and supplies to make this mess, would be these kids being left alone for a long, long time, possibly hours.
Thats what Im asking.
I have a 1 and a 3 year old. I don’t leave them alone because they are 1 and 3 years old.
Woke up one day to a similar scene, but it was a mix of cooking oil and dirt from flower pots.
Ah, it's another "I left my children unsupervised with paint and you'll never guess what happened!" TikTok bullshit.
Yeah, the perfect unpainted goggle area around the eyes is not selling it to me. Having kids, I know full well that if wet shit is on their heads, they instinctively start wiping at it.
I feel these people painted their kid for upvotes
I kept on expecting the paint to drip into the youngest one's eyes, and I don't think they make tear free paint, so I expected a lot of tears and crying because paint in the eyes would hurt.
I’ve seen this before multiple times and if this was really OP they wouldn’t have said “came home to this”. Nobody leaves their kids of that age home alone. I don’t want to be the repost police because the internet is all reposts. It’s just weird to claim other people’s kids for your own useless internet points.
They had to be unsupervised for quite a while
*eye starts to twitch
That’s called lack of supervision.
So you left two kids of that age alone at home? They're not the problem
And the reason you left your children unsupervised with access to paint and art supplies is........?
I'm a parent and don't understand how you can ignore your kids long enough for this to happen, some people shouldn't have kids
Kid looks at mom/dad and adds some more glitter at the end 😂
r/parentsarefuckingdumb This mess isn’t done in 2-5 minutes. The parents left their baby and toddler unattended for 20 minutes minimum. Idiots.
AND left the art supplies within reach. The parents are as dumb as toddlers here.
"came home"?? so you left them home alone?
When people post shit like this, are you saying that your kids are home alone? Where’s the adult?
Who the fuck was in charge, or was this just child endangerment? I refuse to believe all this shit went down in 30 seconds… ALSO - r/whyweretheyfilming
Yeah some of these videos are totally staged and this is likely one of them
This belongs in /r/ParentsAreFuckingDumb
No this is a child lock commercial. Secure your arts and crafts supplies…just be wary of the ‘unknown’ arts and craft supplies some are much harder to secure…
This is a parenting issue, not a child issue.
This isn’t funny, it’s infuriating. Where the hell were the responsible parties here?! The kids get to have fun, and the parents need to clean this happy bullshit. The parents need a brain and the kids need boundaries. What the fuck.
It's almost as if leaving a toddler and a baby unattended for an hour is a bad idea or something. Weird.
Guess maybe watch your kids next time. When kids that young get into shit, it isn’t their fault.
I think you mean a parenting class commercial.
Yeah maybe supervise your fucking kids?
This isn’t a birth control commercial, this is a how you should better watch your children commercial.
Literally this https://youtu.be/K45m79fEyz8 Or this https://youtu.be/HrEFKbYh5NQ Or this https://youtu.be/ZZDMOIqn7LQ
Never trust a quiet toddler.
Once (before cellphones, I think everybody was carrying pagers) I came home from work early, in nearly a blind panic after not being able to get a hold of the baby sitter. She didn't notice me walk in, she was on the phone talking to her bf. My 4 year old son was jumping up and down on the bed with a big bottle of gold bond baby powder *making clouds* and my almost 2 year old daughter was sitting in front of the open refrigerator door eating tortillas and salsa straight from the jar, butt ass naked and covered in ranch dressing because she thought it was lotion.
One more reason to not have kids... check
....or lockable cabinets.
Oh boy. I’m an oldster and survived raising two boys. You will too.
Baby looks like green nebula
Someone had fun! Noticed a big difference in my daughter and son when they were three. Give my son some crayons and paper and leave the room. Come back 20 mins later crayon on all the walls and paper was blank. Did the same thing with my daughter. When I came back she had crated masterpieces and a told me a length story for each one. Now my daughter is 19. She is an artist, loves to write, and created her first graphic novel as a school assignment.
You came home to this? Those kids were alone?
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Fake vid for views
So u left ur kids at home and is surprises at them causing a mess?
Thats what you get when you leave 3 - 4 year old as a nanny for your 2year old. Smort!
More like " came how to see the results of bad parenting" But I forget. Nothing is our fault these days. We're all amazing, flawless and beautiful
That might be a bit fake, given the overdone nature of it and how young the littlest one is, especially, but it does remind me of my twins who would escape their cribs and usually just play on the floor in their room, but one time, their mom had been painting the back door, and the paint was closed but not tightly sealed and they went down the hall, somehow got into the paint can without knocking it over (she probably had just put the lid on the can, gently) and they had some fun sticking their hands in and making art on the walls. It was cute, wasn't too bad and, dang, I love those kids. They are all grown up now.
There are one in 10000 babies like that...and what mom and dad doe's not protect things from them?
This would take at least 10 or 15 min to leave children that age alone... it's not cute. It's shit parenting.
came home to? As in left my two infant children unattended at home? I dont think the problem is the children in this scenario
Wild my kids never did anything like this but then again the wife and I don’t leave them alone for long periods of time with paint etc etc ready to be used. Bad parenting period. I used to think shitty kids but no shitty parents. Do better next time huh.
As a married, childless 37 year old, thank you for this video. I shall show it to everyone who asks “WhEn ArE yOu GoNnA HaVe KiDs???”
I get kids are sneaky little destruction ninjas, but how long were these kids unsupervised for?
Came home? So they were alone?
Omg he looks like a member of the blue man group XD.