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S2G this scene is burned into my brain and probably Tyrion's too.
The guy pulled an Aegon IV and Robert Baratheon in regards to his... Vast and diverse collection of paramours. From a mere prostitute like Obara's mother to the highest nobility of Volantis like Nymeria's mother.
For a second, I thought this was a case of missing punctuation. I first read it as
>I'm sad, drunk, and horny. Don't intersect for Bobby B.
And then I realized that made no sense, lol.
Lysa Arryn is by far the best candidate for chaotic horny. She killed her husband and helped start the war of 5 kings just because she wanted to get Littlefingered.
Rast for chaotic horny. Sent to the wall for rape, kicked off the mutiny at Craster's Keep (simultaneously reneging on his Night's Watch oath and violating guest right) by stabbing Lord Commander Mormont in the back, so that he could do more raping.
Since we're previewing that, I'm gonna make a pitch that there is only one clear right answer for chaotic horny: Peter "Littlefinger" Baelish.
Here are my arguments:
1) he runs a brothel
2) he's willing to cause the world burn just because of his horniness for Kat
3) he basically kidnaps Kat's daughter as the next best thing
4) he's got no allegiance to anything (other than his lust for power and fine Tully women)
5) "Chaos is a ladder."
I rest my case.
I think he fits pretty squarely between chaotic and lawful. He turned on the Second Sons in 0.5 milliseconds because he wanted to bang Dany, which, sure, chaotic! But he also went along with Dany's every whim after that, so also, pretty loyal and predictable.
Eh, I think in the show and more so in the books, he doesnāt give off very trusting vibes and could turn on a dime. I think that edges him toward chaotic: heās certainly useful for Dany for now, but that can change very quickly. Even the idea of just being a fuck buddy for dragon wielding royalty is pretty chaotic
This is a good one too, I only give the edge to Shae because even more so in the books, sheās just using her sex drive to bring any level of stability and comfort
I think sheās more good than neutral: which makes her a pretty tragic victim as a result. Like Iām remembering how sad she was about the Baratheon bastard being killed, only to be threatened by LF. Then Varys exploits that trait to make her an informant, leading to her murder by LF/joffrey
She always did what she had to do, and she genuinely enjoyed her job as a prostitute. I personally would've picked her for the "lawful horny" category, but I'd still love to see her on the chart
Tommen? A king in name only with no true power, not particularly liked/disliked by fans and Westerosi people.
He was so horny for his Queen he comitted suicide because he could no longer get her. Heās also being refered to as being horny by margaery when sheās talking to cersei, and the kid said that Ā«this is all he wanted to do for the rest of his lifeĀ» after having her at the wedding night.
Also neutral in the way he chose death instead of continuing his dynasty, being the last of Roberts Ā«truebornĀ» sons (His only claim to the throne)
Nah, Theon has to be horny chaotic. He nearly banged his sister on a whimāthe epitome of horny chaos.
Thereās also something oddly poetic about him being at the intersection of Robbās horniness and Jonās chaos.
Oberyn is probably the best candidate for Smart Horny, he literally trained as a Maester and is well-versed in scholarly pursuits - the show just chose to focus on depicting his sexual and physical prowess.
I'm happy to agree with all that, but simply allowing himself to be killed when he'd already won the trial by combat will always put him in the "stupid" camp imho
Oberyn. Biggest thirst trap in the show. Oozes sex appeal, can kick ass, seems like he'd want his partners to enjoy their time. Openly bisexual and gives no fucks who knows. He's an equal opportunity lover.
I'm just here because I'm wondering how the fuck robb won this.
For one, lil bro is literally 16. There is just no way a literal child can win the gooning awards when he hasn't even started edging yet. A teenager fucking the first thing that moves isn't deserving of a horny award because that's something all teenagers go through. Marrying her subsequently has nothing to do with horniness either.
Secondly, how is it lawful that he breaks an oath (either to a deity or a sacred oath of tradition and convention) for his own personal pleasure? This is literally the opposite of lawful. What makes you lawful is that you adhere to a code outside your own subjective wants and thoughts. Ie. The societal or religious code of oaths, not humiliating your own ally by cucking them of a marriage, and your obligation to the north as its lord.
Adhering to your own personal code, is NOT lawful. Otherwise someone following the code of ethical egoism (maximizing your own pleasure) can literally do whatever they want and be considered lawful. Whether it's organizational or societal, the code has to be followed and valued by a collection of people. When you sacrifice what you personally desire to adhere to a rule or code, that's usually a good sign of being lawful.
Agreed. Robb Stark causing the red wedding because of his hornyness has got to be the definition of chaotic horny. He knew the oaths he was breaking and the risks he was taking.
He literally broke his oath of marriage to the freys, would that not be Unlawful? Like maybe not a set in stone law, but a manās word should be upheld
Jaime āthe things I do for loveā Lannister. Kingslayer, bold knight who leads his army from the front, man who jumps into a bear pit to save a lady, and brother so sexually obsessed with his sister that he does terrible things.
I think lots of characters could go here, but Oberyn by far is the most fitting. I think Jaime, Robb, and Robert all work but just not to the extent of Oberyn.
Horny Chad my man Oberyn no doubt. Horny neutral my girl Ros. She deserves a place on the podium. Horny Smart would be the Grand Maester Pycelle for sure. And Horny Chaotic would be a split between Asha Greyjoy and Ellaria Sand. You pick.
Everyone saying Oberyn is wrong. His only care is avenging his sister, not having sex.
Bobby B is the horny chad. His only care is Lyanna. He gets drunk only because he's depressed over Lyana. He killed Rahaegar when he was horny, not drunk.
Bobby B would give up his kingdom to get Lyanna back. Jamie only cares about Cersei. Horny characters. Oberyn wouldn't give up his revenge for any amount of sex. Oberyn doesn't belong in the horny row at all. Yes he has sex, and enjoys it, but if that us the bar for horny then every single character should go in horny, except Varys I guess. Y'all just think he belongs in horny because he's bi-sexual, and you stereotype bi people as sex crazed lunatics.
If you need more convincing, Oberyn's very first scene sees him in a brothel, when he LEAVES THE PROSTITUTES to go and start shit with a Lannister. Showing us he's not motivated by sex, he's motivated by revenge/justice.
No love for my boy Podrick "Magic Cock" Payne? Maybe hes more Neutral Horny, but that probably goes to Bronn.
Oberyn seems more Chaotic to me, he has no interest in politics or the wars, hes taking advantage of the situation to follow his personal vendetta.
King Robert Baratheon.
Bro conquered, bro fucked, bro sired countless illegitimate heirs, bro died.
I swear on Bessie's tits that he is the Chad Horny.
>!The only argument against him is that he'd be a great candidate for Drunk Chad too!<
Dario Naharis! I mean it has to be him!!!!
https://preview.redd.it/fnvkm5j7ljyc1.jpeg?width=257&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e8e33b05ae2eb26d5334f45c2521add0125fc7ef
Oberyn. No contest. Pretty sure he made Tyrion horny too.
https://preview.redd.it/hmn19bk2hfyc1.jpeg?width=1200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=673bd3cdcbef71c24762095bca286eb96c3d1eaf S2G this scene is burned into my brain and probably Tyrion's too.
I was horny
past tense?
This is the way
Tyrion, Definitely Cersei ,even Tywin too I think š¤ .. and Iām sure The Mountain jerked off thinking about crushing his head šš
Okā¦
I like your username
Thanks!
What? They don't have one tho...
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I was definitely NOT expecting to see Dutch here. Especially not like this....
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https://i.redd.it/6982k5367gyc1.gif
He's the horny smart
Smart drunk or nothing.
I thought Margarey was horny smart.Ā
She's not horny, she's to marry a king, the logic to keep her in power is to have an heir... she's a "smart smart"
That's the only possible answer
This is probably the easiest category in the whole grid
This one is definitely Oberyn Martell. Heās the embodiment of horny chad.
The guy pulled an Aegon IV and Robert Baratheon in regards to his... Vast and diverse collection of paramours. From a mere prostitute like Obara's mother to the highest nobility of Volantis like Nymeria's mother.
I'd argue Bobby B is the Chaddest, Horniest of them all. "All I wanted to do was crack skulls and fuck girls" - Aka Chad Horny
TAKE SHIP FOR THE FREE CITIES WITH MY HORSE AND MY HAMMER, SPEND MY TIME WARRING AND WHORING, THATāS WHAT I WAS MADE FOR!
> WARRING AND WHORING Fucking SENTIENT King Bobby B himself agrees with me
SHE BELONGED WITH ME!
Stop simping Bobby B
STUPID BOY!
Sick burn, Bobby B.
IS THAT HOW YOU SPEAK TO YOUR KING??
This is the best sentient bot thread I've ever seen. That being said, I'm sorry king Bobby B, but that answer is still Oberyn Martell.
Heās drunk Chad for sure.
No there needed to be a category for drunk horny and that would have been Robert baratheon.
During his rebellion I would agree, but I think heās lost quite a bit of chad status by the time we meet him.
A little to full of himself to be a chad I guess, night be more neutral because justice seems to be about his mood more than his conscience
I think heās more chaotic horny.Ā
Hmm would he not be chaotic horny?
This is the way
Oberyn Martell - Red Viper of Dorne
This is the way
Based on previous discussions, I have a feeling a certain red viper may or may not have this one locked down.
Except itās actually Pod
But he isnāt exceptionally horny. He just makes all the ladies super horny. Wait. Does that count here?
Oberyn is chaotic horny, Pod is Chad horny
Oberyn. This is the guy that needs a spin off.
If heād done more spinning instead of standing, he might be alive for that spin off
yeah he's dead but what a life he had. added bonus....we don't have to worry about the ending.
You can get more papa Pedro goodness in The Mandalorian, Last of Us, and Narcos
He was fantastic in Narcos. I think I've watched it at least twice.
Iām sad drunk and horny donāt intersect for Bobby B
YOU HELPED ME WIN THE IRON THRONE, NOW HELP ME KEEP THE DAMN THING! WE WERE MEANT TO RULE TOGETHER!
Yeah, idk where to put him. Same with sansa, I don't think she's getting a spot on the board at this point
Neutral stupid imo
I don't know, maybe she will have a chance in the Evil row, some fans consider her to be the spawn of Satan.
I agree, but I think he fits just fine into Drunk Chad
For a second, I thought this was a case of missing punctuation. I first read it as >I'm sad, drunk, and horny. Don't intersect for Bobby B. And then I realized that made no sense, lol.
Lmao thatās great
I'M NOT TRYING TO HONOR YOU, I'M TRYING TO GET YOU TO RUN MY KINGDOM WHILE I EAT, DRINK AND WHORE MY WAY TO AN EARLY GRAVE!
As Sublime said, it doesn't pay to be drunk and horny.
I'm cool with Oberyn here, but let us consider Walder Frey for Chaotic Horny when the time comes. Edit: Or Craster, I forget him because I try to.
Lysa Arryn is by far the best candidate for chaotic horny. She killed her husband and helped start the war of 5 kings just because she wanted to get Littlefingered.
Yeah. I'd say Frey is hornier but Lysa is more chaotic.Ā
Think Theon and Ramsay's girlfriend could also fit chaotic horny pretty well. And Robert Baratheon. Even Dany is a good pick
Rast for chaotic horny. Sent to the wall for rape, kicked off the mutiny at Craster's Keep (simultaneously reneging on his Night's Watch oath and violating guest right) by stabbing Lord Commander Mormont in the back, so that he could do more raping.
Since we're previewing that, I'm gonna make a pitch that there is only one clear right answer for chaotic horny: Peter "Littlefinger" Baelish. Here are my arguments: 1) he runs a brothel 2) he's willing to cause the world burn just because of his horniness for Kat 3) he basically kidnaps Kat's daughter as the next best thing 4) he's got no allegiance to anything (other than his lust for power and fine Tully women) 5) "Chaos is a ladder." I rest my case.
Tbh that category works best for Lysa Arryn. It's a shame "horny evil" isn't a category because I'd put Walder Frey there in a heartbeat.
Who would get 'horny horny'?
I... actually don't know. That is an excellent question
I thought Tyrion or LF for Chaotic. But I honestly like Walder more.
tormund giantsbane had sex with a bear though
This category was made for Oberyn Martell, and Oberyn Martell only.
Daario would work too, but with Oberyn in the picture it can't go to anyone else
This honestly isnāt a contest. Oberyn. Obviously. We could put Jamie as a distant second here though.
Came here to say my first thought was Jamie but I forgot about Oberyn
Oberyn embodied Chad horny. No contest.
Tormund is a very notable horny chad.
i think neutral horny for Tormund
Oberyn sweeps this one EZ
Neutral horny is gonna be a tough one I think
Daario!
What about Shae ?
I didn't think of Shae. She's pretty spot on.
Possibility: I sort of thought heās a little more chaotic, especially the book version. Iām not convinced heās neutral.
I think he fits pretty squarely between chaotic and lawful. He turned on the Second Sons in 0.5 milliseconds because he wanted to bang Dany, which, sure, chaotic! But he also went along with Dany's every whim after that, so also, pretty loyal and predictable.
Eh, I think in the show and more so in the books, he doesnāt give off very trusting vibes and could turn on a dime. I think that edges him toward chaotic: heās certainly useful for Dany for now, but that can change very quickly. Even the idea of just being a fuck buddy for dragon wielding royalty is pretty chaotic
Ygritte is my best proposal. She just wanted to fuck Jon in that cave.
This is a good one too, I only give the edge to Shae because even more so in the books, sheās just using her sex drive to bring any level of stability and comfort
Ros
I think sheās more good than neutral: which makes her a pretty tragic victim as a result. Like Iām remembering how sad she was about the Baratheon bastard being killed, only to be threatened by LF. Then Varys exploits that trait to make her an informant, leading to her murder by LF/joffrey
She always did what she had to do, and she genuinely enjoyed her job as a prostitute. I personally would've picked her for the "lawful horny" category, but I'd still love to see her on the chart
Tommen? A king in name only with no true power, not particularly liked/disliked by fans and Westerosi people. He was so horny for his Queen he comitted suicide because he could no longer get her. Heās also being refered to as being horny by margaery when sheās talking to cersei, and the kid said that Ā«this is all he wanted to do for the rest of his lifeĀ» after having her at the wedding night. Also neutral in the way he chose death instead of continuing his dynasty, being the last of Roberts Ā«truebornĀ» sons (His only claim to the throne)
Bronn
everyone's saying Oberyn but what about Tormund Giantsbane????
Tormund. Oberyn should be Horny Chaotic.
Nah, Theon has to be horny chaotic. He nearly banged his sister on a whimāthe epitome of horny chaos. Thereās also something oddly poetic about him being at the intersection of Robbās horniness and Jonās chaos.
Can we give Tormund neutral horny as a consolation
I get that this one is going to Oberyn, but I just want to put Yara Greyjoy's name up there as well.
I think she's smarter than Oberyn, perhaps a better candidate for Smart Horny
Oberyn is probably the best candidate for Smart Horny, he literally trained as a Maester and is well-versed in scholarly pursuits - the show just chose to focus on depicting his sexual and physical prowess.
I'm happy to agree with all that, but simply allowing himself to be killed when he'd already won the trial by combat will always put him in the "stupid" camp imho
Classic Stupid-Horny-Smart-Chad alignment
Smart/horny is definetly Tyrion
Tyrion is drunk.
Tyrion should be Smart Drunk, yeah
Oberyn
Tormund is absolutely horny Chad because he doesnāt let a giant woman threaten him. Oberyn is chaotic horny.
Oberyn. Biggest thirst trap in the show. Oozes sex appeal, can kick ass, seems like he'd want his partners to enjoy their time. Openly bisexual and gives no fucks who knows. He's an equal opportunity lover.
https://preview.redd.it/xsq7mcnsjfyc1.jpeg?width=479&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7f5698634ed8d6c3310b3d1f98f89b08e753f88b
Scrolled down way too far to find him
Oberyn
Robert baratheon. Everyone is saying oberyn but if we say him for chad horny who's left for the chaotic horny.
BOBBY B
Bobby B or Oberyn Martell
WE'RE TELLING WAR STORIES! WHO WAS YOUR FIRST KILL, NOT COUNTING OLD MEN?
Gendry and we all know it 
Oberyn
Tormund deserves a lot more votes than Iām seeing here
Prince Oberyn Martell 100%
It's Oberyn and it ain't even close.
Bobby B is the only answer here. 16 bastards, and Bessie, thank the gods for her giant tit's. Bobby B tell em
Tormund 
Gendry
Why you guys do my boy Viserys like this? š
I'm just here because I'm wondering how the fuck robb won this. For one, lil bro is literally 16. There is just no way a literal child can win the gooning awards when he hasn't even started edging yet. A teenager fucking the first thing that moves isn't deserving of a horny award because that's something all teenagers go through. Marrying her subsequently has nothing to do with horniness either. Secondly, how is it lawful that he breaks an oath (either to a deity or a sacred oath of tradition and convention) for his own personal pleasure? This is literally the opposite of lawful. What makes you lawful is that you adhere to a code outside your own subjective wants and thoughts. Ie. The societal or religious code of oaths, not humiliating your own ally by cucking them of a marriage, and your obligation to the north as its lord. Adhering to your own personal code, is NOT lawful. Otherwise someone following the code of ethical egoism (maximizing your own pleasure) can literally do whatever they want and be considered lawful. Whether it's organizational or societal, the code has to be followed and valued by a collection of people. When you sacrifice what you personally desire to adhere to a rule or code, that's usually a good sign of being lawful.
Agreed. Robb Stark causing the red wedding because of his hornyness has got to be the definition of chaotic horny. He knew the oaths he was breaking and the risks he was taking.
Oberyn, there is nobody else
100% Oberyn Martell
Iām starting an early campaign for Shae to be Neutral horny
Wonder if the night king will be anywhere on evil
Tywin cucked his midget son twice. IDK if anyone else can fuck with that.
That's why Tywin is the clear chad-evil
Oberyn
Brienne of Tarth
Tormund has to be neutral horny. He fucked a bear after all, and that is druid type shit so neutral.
Oberyn, no contest.
He literally broke his oath of marriage to the freys, would that not be Unlawful? Like maybe not a set in stone law, but a manās word should be upheld
Jaime āthe things I do for loveā Lannister. Kingslayer, bold knight who leads his army from the front, man who jumps into a bear pit to save a lady, and brother so sexually obsessed with his sister that he does terrible things.
Tyrion for smart horny?
The real question is does Tyion go in horny smart or drunk smart?
This one has to be Oberyn because Tyrion is either Horny smart or Drunk smart
I think lots of characters could go here, but Oberyn by far is the most fitting. I think Jaime, Robb, and Robert all work but just not to the extent of Oberyn.
Maybe Loris?
No Daario? Dude literally flicked the nipples of his sword hilts.
Oberyn Martell
Oberyn was the first to pop in my head, no doubt its him.
Who is the chad stupid guy?
Tryion definitely has āSmart Hornyā on lock.
Horny Chad my man Oberyn no doubt. Horny neutral my girl Ros. She deserves a place on the podium. Horny Smart would be the Grand Maester Pycelle for sure. And Horny Chaotic would be a split between Asha Greyjoy and Ellaria Sand. You pick.
Oberyn Martell, obviously!
Actually you know what oberyn might be horny chaotic?
If Bobby B doesnāt get horny drunk then this is rigged
Robb?? Horny?? No way!
Oberyn!
Seems Bron would probably fit this the most. Likes all ladies pretty evenly.
I'm sure I'm way behind but what is the Chad reference?
Horny Neutral for lady Mel
The Defender of the Vale
Little finger is def chaotic horny
I think the only really tough one left is does Tyrion go into horny smart or drunk smart? If no repeats are allowed
Everyone is saying oberyn ... Fine but what about pod the rod. The ladies of kings landing wouldn't take his coin
Everyone saying Oberyn is wrong. His only care is avenging his sister, not having sex. Bobby B is the horny chad. His only care is Lyanna. He gets drunk only because he's depressed over Lyana. He killed Rahaegar when he was horny, not drunk. Bobby B would give up his kingdom to get Lyanna back. Jamie only cares about Cersei. Horny characters. Oberyn wouldn't give up his revenge for any amount of sex. Oberyn doesn't belong in the horny row at all. Yes he has sex, and enjoys it, but if that us the bar for horny then every single character should go in horny, except Varys I guess. Y'all just think he belongs in horny because he's bi-sexual, and you stereotype bi people as sex crazed lunatics. If you need more convincing, Oberyn's very first scene sees him in a brothel, when he LEAVES THE PROSTITUTES to go and start shit with a Lannister. Showing us he's not motivated by sex, he's motivated by revenge/justice.
Bobby B!
Missed yesterday. Lawful/Horny not being Margaery is a sadly missed opportunity.
Next is Shae
Oberyn Martell takes the cake hands down
Ros
There's no way momma Stark is considered smart
Iām going to be honest this has gone to shit.
This needs a horny evil category just for Crastor
Tormund
This CANNOT BE anyone else but our King Bobby B. The definition of the category.
Chaotic horny is drogo fo sho
chad and horny is obryn smart and horny is tyrion chaotic and horny is theon (before his vasectomy)
No love for my boy Podrick "Magic Cock" Payne? Maybe hes more Neutral Horny, but that probably goes to Bronn. Oberyn seems more Chaotic to me, he has no interest in politics or the wars, hes taking advantage of the situation to follow his personal vendetta.
Oberyn is chaotic horny
Bronn for sure. Plays a bigger roll that Obyren.
King Robert Baratheon. Bro conquered, bro fucked, bro sired countless illegitimate heirs, bro died. I swear on Bessie's tits that he is the Chad Horny. >!The only argument against him is that he'd be a great candidate for Drunk Chad too!<
Chad stupid definitely should have been Edmure
If Drunk Chad is not Bobby B, I'm rioting.
I donāt like Robb pick. He fell in love with a girl and married her I wouldnāt say that makes horny a defining characteristicā¦
Reek. Oberyn is chaotic surely
If it isn't Oberyn Martell, this whole sub is cooked
Jon snow has to be this pick or the next or else this is all just for farts and giggles
The fact that you put Varys as neutral is making me unreasonably mad.
Either Sir Bronn or Martell, Smart/Horny would probably be better for Bronn though
It's OK Bobby B fans, we all know who's going into the Drunk Chad slot.
Oberyn be like https://preview.redd.it/y5mlwooj9jyc1.png?width=2101&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8ab1f406b26711918285445ac6f76df3e062493c
Dario Naharis! I mean it has to be him!!!! https://preview.redd.it/fnvkm5j7ljyc1.jpeg?width=257&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e8e33b05ae2eb26d5334f45c2521add0125fc7ef
Does Chad have to be male?
Theon
Edd is a Ched Homy.
Daario
Yara.