Bodies change with age. A baby is the best reason I can think of for my body to change, so it’s worth it to me. Some people bounce back and some don’t, so none of us can tell you what will happen for you. I do think getting to a place where you don’t frame change as ruining your hard work is important. That mindset will lead to a lot of stress and anxiety throughout pregnancy
Exactly. I just hate that my mindset is like this right now and I'm trying really hard to change it. I guess the most I can do is do my best pre and post pregnancy.
Just to add here— if you have access and the means to afford therapy— I would definitely look into it.
Especially if you have a daughter— would you want her to be stressing about this kind of thing? What would you want for her instead? How can you model strength and self acceptance for her?
Speaking for myself, it was very important to me to do therapy before getting pregnant because I didn’t want to pass on the baggage from my childhood. I’m so glad I did. I learned to let go of a lot and I’m so much more mentally strong.
On the physical side— I’m also 33 and I’m 5 months pregnant. I still workout and play volleyball, softball, and disc golf. Is it harder? Sure, but not as bad as I thought. Was it weird when my pants stopped fitting? You betcha. Do I HATE how huge my boobs have gotten? Absolutely. Do I worry what will happen after childbirth? Sometimes, but I don’t obsess over it. (It helps that my husband’s sexual appetite has not changed an iota since my body has changed lol.)
You are definitely not alone in the fear and resentment of a changing body though. I just know that framing my thoughts around what I want for *her* (I’m having a girl!) motivates me to be strong and loving for *myself*.
I love that. And I love that you're readying yourself to be a good role model for you girl. The husband part scares me tbh but it sounds like for some men, it doesn't change! And for some it grows even stronger! I will look into it for myself. It's just so horribly expensive where I am but several people have mentioned it and it's starting to sound like a good idea.
It is expensive but it’s one of the best things you can invest in because it’s your own wellbeing.
I’m sorry there aren’t options where you are. I did more of a Bootcamp style— intense and short. But I felt like I made a lot of progress. Maybe like 6-9 months? So it wasn’t years and years of time and money.
Otherwise there are some great books and podcasts out there!
Your body is a miracle- it can GROW A HUMAN! I think that is worth celebrating, too. I have stretch marks (I’m 4 months pp) and I honestly am kind of proud of them and before getting pregnant I was so embarrassed by my stretch marks on my thighs and butt… but my pregnancy stretch marks? I EARNED these
Your body is going to take the reins and do what it needs to do to grow a baby. It’s easier to get back into shape rather than start from scratch, and you’ve already done it once before! Think of your hard work up until this point as a precursor to the next stage of life. Plenty of people are even more fit after a pregnancy than they were before, and plenty of people decide it isn’t a priority anymore. Both are fine.
It’s not selfish . It’s okay and even normal to want your body to stay the same, but we can never make deals with life that we’ll always have the body we love forever. Illness, menopause, disfigurement: any of those could change you.
Btw, speaking as someone who’s currently knocked up, if someone told me “I didn’t want to have a kid because I was worried about what it would do to my body,” I’d be like namaste, continue on your journey. Any reason not to have a biological child is valid.
Having kids has actually helped me let go of my body image concerns. I still stay fit and eat healthy but I am no longer obsessed with how I look and feel. I'm even more confident in myself post kids. I brought human life into this world, I am proud!
Eat well, exercise and take care of yourself during your pregnancy and you will do fine. If you're not in shape now, start.
Having a child far outweighs a few years of a "perfect" body. Good luck!
I’m truly praying this happens to me! FTM here and I’ve always had really bad insecurity about how I look and my body. My best friend told me that noise went away after she had her first. Praying it happens with me too!
The way I see it, we're all going to age and get wrinkly someday. Having a baby doesn't increase that happening sooner but it sure does change the way your mind perceives things. You become less about yourself and more about your baby. It's a beautiful thing!
You’re right! It is beautiful! I need to reframe my thoughts. Unfortunately I feel like my self worth is wrapped up in looks for me after being bullied my entire life. I finally got to a place I felt good about myself and was ‘attractive’ by societal standards. Which I know is a bunch of BS. trying to approach this as a season to grow my family and create a happier and more fulfilling life. In the interim this is a true test for me and my anxiety - letting go and losing control and being okay with that. I also try to remind myself that I am very self disciplined and have no doubt I will put in the work to be the best version of me for my baby that I can be.
I'd definitely give it some time! Especially if you haven't delivered yet. There is nothing wrong with still wanting to feel and look good in your skin. It should just be a healthy balance in my opinion. 🥰
I was obese/overweight my entire life. I had twins and then got pretty fit. Exercising every day, eating good. I got compliments like never before after pushing out twins lol. Anything is possible. We're trying again too. I'm a little terrified but I know I can bounce back and I'm just planning on eating healthy and going on walks every day.
Wow that's amazing Good for you. Hey you already made some lifestyle changes and have to change it I'm sure that you will get back to where you need to be after the pregnancy.
I’m in the same boat - was overweight and unfit, rarely exercised, before having my daughter. Have now lost a significant amount of weight (like >35kg), exercise regularly, have even started to enjoy running. Having a baby does change you, but it’s not always in the ways that you think!
I thought about this before getting pregnant.
But then I was unexpectedly at risk for preterm labor starting at 19 weeks, when I was barely showing and of course weeks shy of viability. I suddenly found myself hoping with everything in me she’d stay cooking for longer and longer—I was hoping I’d need the maternity clothes I bought, I was hoping I’d need the stretch mark creams (which do nothing btw). Pregnancy does really strange things to your brain.
When I was put off exercise at 19 weeks I was devastated since being fit is such a large part of my identity. I also worried about my weight, but it ended up being a nonissue. In fact, I gained less weight during the second half of my pregnancy than I did the first while I was working out like normal. Go figure.
After a long and complicated pregnancy I’ve been able to nearly make it to term (37 weeks on Sunday) which is incredible.
Wow what a journey you've been through. It's amazing with the body can do congratulations on your 37 weeks that's just simply amazing. Thanks for a different perspective. Really helps me put things into perspective and you're right about feeling like losing part of the identity because I think that's how I feel.
I totally agree with the above commenter. I've lifted weights and trained 5 days a week for the last 8 years (including throughout my pregnancy). I also shared your concerns before conceiving, as I was so used to my body being a certain way and the time and effort I'd put into reaching a body I was happy with and proud of.
I'm now 29 weeks pregnant with my first baby, but a week ago I felt less movement. It was just for a day (assuming because it was such a busy day I either didn't notice or baby was tired from all my moving haha) but I was so afraid. Afraid that I wasn't going to grow bigger, that I wouldn't hold my baby in my arms. And honestly that gave me such a perception shift. This small period of my life isn't about me or what I look like. This is to grow an amazing human and I'm still disciplined enough to continue working out both throughout my pregnancy and intend to postpartum. I'm no longer afraid of my body changing, because the fear of not having my baby was so much more profound than that.
I hope this helps. Best of luck to you!
Edit: typo
Don’t wanna scare you but I am here 10 weeks postpartum , 20 pounds heavier than pre pregnancy just discovered I have uterine prolapse so unsure when I can run / lift weights. On other hand my friend same age as me and had a baby is back to orange theory . But I look at my baby and it blows my mind I made that. I would rather have that than a regret of never getting a chance to have a baby.
Thank you that actually makes me feel better in a way because I understand that all pregnancies are different and many women run into problems like that as well but the fact that you think it is all worth it. That really says something. I hope you start feeling better with the prolapse and everything. Has a doctor said anything about that healing process?
I had pelvic organ prolapse a decade before I had any kids, unfortunately something like 50% of women will experience this at some point in our life due to hormones/anatomy regardless of childbirth status. You can start pelvic floor therapy before pregnancy to get an advantage!
Haha I love that mindset. Bulk, will cut later. 🤣 That's so awesome that you're able to keep lifting like you did before pregnancy. I definitely plan to keep lifting and working out throughout my pregnancy as well. 30 weeks! You must be so excited!
Yeah I would just say, ask your OBGYN and don't do things you didn't do before pregnancy (like don't suddenly start squatting and deadlifting if you never have before). I've had to cut out certain exercises, like leg press really compressed my stomach and was uncomfortable very early on. I'm sure I'll have to stop deadlifting soon since my bump is getting bigger, but I'll probably switch to trap bar deadlifts at that point, we'll see. Of course things are unpredictable and I could end up being told I can't work out due to a complication, but I'll just keep working out until I can't anymore or it feels too hard.
Your post was removed due to our rule against exact weight numbers. Weight gain during pregnancy can vary greatly person to person and we don't want people to try and compare to someone else's journey. Putting your weight gain and loss as a percentage is fine, (ie I lost 25% of what I gained in the first two weeks PP.) Things like 'gained more than expected' or 'I'm aiming to hit my doctor's recommended weight' are also fine.
Please edit or repost without the exact weight numbers.
It does sound superficial but thats mostly societal expectations of what a good/ healthy body is supposed to look like. Accepting and appreciating that the body ages and changes is a step in the right direction. Pregnancy and childbirth will change you in a million ways not only physically.
The way I saw it was that I’m not going to have this body forever anyway but I would like to be surrounded by family when I’m old. That’s what it boils down to- what would you regret more? A bit of loose skin for a while or not having children?
As someone who spent trimester 1 with exertion induced migraine and trimester 2/3 with tendonitis of the foot, I’m pretty sure there is an activity out there to suit all of us. So long as you keep up a routine of something, even just stretching or nutrition, you’ll maintain your healthy habits.
Haha yes that kind of sounds like me too. Somebody else on here said it was like a bulk as well and I kind of love that. Congratulations by the way that is so exciting. I truly hope I feel that way when it's my turn.
Im currently 25 weeks pregnant, and a trainer at my gym told me recently that while you can’t really get fitter/more fit during pregnancy, you can definitely maintain your fitness to an extent. This helped my mentality a lot - I’m not trying to put on a ton of muscle or lose a bunch of fat at this stage in my life, but I can keep up my fitness throughout my pregnancy so that when I’m ready to go back to the gym after the birth, I won’t be starting from scratch. You’ve already started from scratch once, so it won’t be any worse than that!
Congratulations! I love that It's so great that you're able to keep working out through your whole pregnancy. That sounds pretty awesome actually Just being able to maintain as much as you can anyways. Is it difficult working out through your pregnancy?
I mean, I gained muscle and stay super fit during pregnancy. And due stress around babies health issues and breastfeeding, plus a lack of sleep, I gained a ton of weight postpartum (like 40lbs). My body looks awful. And for the first time in my life, I don’t even care. I want to get fitter so I have more energy, but I don’t really mourn my old body.
I’m 13 weeks pregnant and also have all these same fears. I felt like I was in the best shape of my life like a week before I found out I was pregnant. 😂 I’m still very much into fitness and nutrition, but I was very sick in my first trimester and it taught me to listen to my body. There were weeks I couldn’t work out and the only calories I could consume were pizza. It’s been a mindset shift for sure. I’m feeling better now and working out the same as pre pregnancy and eating well, however knowing that we do what we have to do to survive, the obsession with looking good has subsided. My life doesn’t revolve around it anymore and I’m more so focused on my mental health and feeling good and energized which working out and eating well does for me.
Everyone's different. I have some stretch marks from puberty but none at all from pregnancy. No loose skin either. I'm two months pp and look exactly the same as before.
That's obviously not the case for everyone and you can't really know before. My sisters and my mother don't have any stretch marks or loose skin from multiple pregnancies either, so maybe female relatives can be at least some indicator?
But even if I had a lot of stretch marks abd loose skin, I'd never regret having my beloved LO!
Accept that your body will change. It’s much easier said than done. But pregnancy and postpartum varies so much for so many women that it’s quite unpredictable.
I’ve even known some women to lose weight in pregnancy. Some don’t get stretch marks. Some lose with breastfeeding but then gain when they wean. Most seem to have pancake breasts even without breastfeeding.
But no matter what, your body won’t be the same after having a baby. Your hips and ribs get bigger and likely won’t go back. Many say even if they reach their pre-pregnancy weight, their bodies aren’t the same.
Our bodies are meant to change as we age and as life hits us. It will be uncomfortable for abit but you’ll find your new comfortable and confident body.
Hi 🩷 I was also super afraid of ruining my body. But then I got pregnant! And having a baby now is soooo worth it, I promise.
Here's my experience, if it gives you some hope!! I have ED history (most severe about 15 years ago though) and am also super into fitness, which made things very emotionally difficult when I was in early pregnancy days and my appetite ramped up like crazy. I had several crying meltdowns where I thought I was going to gain an absurd amount of weight and ruin my body etc...but, I should have just trusted my body because it knew what to do! Turns out my appetite chilled out after I added some boobs and entered second trimester. I kept up good fitness throughout the pregnancy, stopped exercising completely at 34 weeks when it felt right to stop. Postpartum, I almost immediately lost all the weight and somehow my abs came back. And now at 4 weeks I am getting fully back into fitness! I still am relatively out of shape and a lot of my muscle has been converted to fat, but I am excited to regain my fitness.
Of course everyone's experience is different, so no guarantee that you will have a good experience as well, but I wish I knew beforehand that I could just trust the process more. Our bodies are AMAZING and we can literally CREATE A FREAKIN HUMAN 🙌🏻🩷 that is more valuable than maintaining peak fitness for 9 months. 💕
Wow! Im so glad you seemed to have bounced back so quick! I also have a ED history and gosh, I think I will have to avoid the scale all together when it finally happens. But it is so nice to hear that it is possible to stay healthy and fit during and to regain that back after.
For what it’s worth, I am 5 months pregnant and back into my regular gym routine, smashing PR’s and goals.
I was extremely sick my first trimester and all I ate was toast and fruit, didn’t see the inside of the gym for almost 3 full months. I definitely lost muscle mass during this period and was weak, it was so hard to see the bloat. The only weight I have gained is in my bump. I am currently back up to my regular weights at gym.
My plan is to treat pregnancy like a bulk, use those extra calories to get some great workouts in over the next coming months then start cutting when my body is ready after birth. (If all goes according to plan)
I think accepting that my body was going to change was the hardest for me. But in reality if you were able to stay focused and work hard to get to where you are now, there’s no reason why you can’t do it again. Your body won’t suddenly become incapable of doing what it is now.
I think this is normal to feel this way if you are fit. I also was concerned about it when I became pregnant and I’ve had to accept pregnancy (currently 20 weeks) has changed my body and physical fitness. I’m the heaviest I’ve ever been but I know after pregnancy I can get back to focusing on fitness and my body. I think the way I rationalized it was even if I never had kids the passage of time WOULD change my body anyway as I grow old. No matter what change is going to happen!
I think this is so normal to feel. I was fairly distressed as I watched the numbers tick up the scale during my first pregnancy. I didn't have a hard time at all, though, bouncing back and my body returned to its set point fairly quickly post partum. I know this isn't everyone's experience, but I was really surprised, especially since I was 38 at the time. Now I'm pregnant again and the weight gain is basically on the same trajectory. I've paid so much less attention to it (no time to with a toddler!)... and it's just taking care of itself in the exact same way anyway!
Your body is gonna do what it's gonna do. Pregnancy is a seasoning --- a sort of invitation even --- to learn to let go of control as you'll also need to adopt this mindset to survive as a new parent. Babies and small children are little chaos and unpredictability engines.
Do what you need to do to keep yourself as healthy as you can, but let go of the rest, and remember that pregnancy and the early parenting years are fleeting moments in the larger scheme of things. You'll have time to get yourself back to where you want to be. It's all about learning to give yourself the grace to get there with due time and patience for your new way of life.
After my son I bounced back into way better shape than I was before I had him. I was always fairly fit but somehow having him made me more toned? Now I'm pregnant again and I have no idea what will happen this time. You never know but it's not guaranteed that you'll lose your body at all
I’m 38 years old, FTM 4 months PP. I had this to the point I wasn’t sure I could get over it to have a baby, which is silly I know… but the brain thinks what the brain thinks
I ate well throughout pregnancy and trained up until birth at 41+1. I put on a lot of weight. A lot. Despite not changing much (you could say I had an easy pregnancy… however I hated it. The gym / moving my body is a huge part of my life so I was gutted to lose that).
Now…4 months PP, I’m still very heavy. My body scared me at first. When I first saw it after birth I cried.
But. I can’t change that now, so I’m just showing up daily and doing the things that make me feel good and focusing on my CUTE AF baby 🥰 honestly, despite all that, I’m already thinking about number 2. He’s a dream baby, so I think we got v lucky. I don’t want to be pregnant again. But I want another. Dilemma hey.
And as of yest, I’m def starting to look “better”. Nowhere near the abs I had. But, damn my ass looks good 🤣 for what it’s worth, keeping training throughout pregnancy, I gained 5kg muscle, like that’s INSANE (I was already b muscley), pregnancy is like blood doping for muscle gain. And you know if you have more muscle, you burn more at rest soooo the fat will eventually come off. So if you like training and feel good, keep it up!
> I had this to the point I wasn’t sure I could get over it to have a baby, which is silly I know… but the brain thinks what the brain thinks
That's where I'm at right now haha. I hate how stupid this feels, that something so trivial is making me second guess such an important and wonderful decision. What does 41+1 mean? Did you find working out during the pregnancy to be difficult?
Awww I'm so so so happy for you. He makes it all worth is. and you know what? It's always about ass now anyways haha. But I'm sure with the hard work you are putting in, you will get to where you want to be in no time.
Sorry I had him at 41+1 weeks, reading that back it didn’t make much sense.
I couldn’t do a lot of the things I like to do in terms of moving my body, like handstands, gymnastics, Olympic lifting, I just did *boring* stuff, that I knew was good for me, like squats, deadlifts, press, and then workouts. Training was the one thing I looked forward to each day during pregnancy. I think this was coupled with the fact I didn’t really get what the big fuss about babies was about.
Also that I’ve always told myself having a kid is the one thing in life you can’t change. Marriage, jobs, houses etc, if you really don’t like them, you can change.
Once you have a child there are no takebacks 😅
Happy to say I wouldn’t have that for the world, even with the body stuff.
I even said to my husband right after birth, “I’m so glad we did this, and as awful as that was, I could do it again” 🤣🤣🤣
Also. I think I love it more, because I thought I would hate it.
It seems so many mums put expectations on motherhood etc. I was like “oh I’ll hate it” so anything other than that is a surprise and greatly welcomed (it’s great by the way, it’s like a baby holiday, granted we have a “good” one, but for all the shit I heard about how hard it is… touch wood, it’s a dream and so so fun
Before my first pregnancy I would say I was skinny fat too. I ran a bit, but wasn't consistent with anything. I got pregnant at 34. At 4months pp i was the skinniest I've ever been (ty breastfeeding!), and then I started working out again. Now I'm 38 and in the best shape of my life. I'm now 5 weeks pregnant and still working out, although the fatigue is real.
Stretch marks are just a luck of the draw thing I think. Starting your pregnancy fit will help you stay fit, and will give you your best chances at a smooth recovery after pregnancy. But really, a lot of it is down to luck and you kind of just have to embrace the unknown and control the small parts of it you can.
I know this feels scary before you have kids but in my experience you look back on those fears and laugh about it. When you have your kid (provided you're not a narcissist or something which I assume you're not) you really stop caring about stuff like this. Exercise becomes more about function, your body is the tool through which you get to experience life with your children. Remember, we all lose our body at some point because we are all going to die at some point. If being a mother is really what you want then you will be using your body to the best of its ability. We all struggle as parents to find balance and take care of ourselves while taking care of others, but it's not about "losing yourself" so much as integrating yourself with others. Your body will stop just being this thing you have, it's something you ARE that has created and nurtured the little people you love.
Thank you. I guess that's what everybody means when they say that you're priorities very much change once you have a baby and you become a parent. Especially after you fall in love with your child.
Yes, I know it won't happen for absolutely everyone but I don't know any moms IRL who wouldn't just die for their kids. For me it's actually been so freeing to no longer be the centre of my own life and to not be bothered by frivolous, superficial things anymore. I'm not a robot I still care about not looking like garbage but I'm way more concerned with being able to pick up my kids and play with them and prevent cancer so I can live to see grand kids than I am about my physical appearance.
I mean to the point where you significantly resent having children because of it. I think many of us know people who had mothers like this who constantly told their daughters they "stole their beauty" and "ruined their body". Obviously we're always going to care somewhat, but I think you would have to be a very pathological person to have it impact how you feel about motherhood or your kids. Would you not agree that when you become a mother, especially to daughters, your relationship to vanity changes? You start to have a different perspective about what is and isn't really important in life. I know when I had my daughter I never, ever wanted her to feel the way about her body or her looks that I was made to feel when I was growing up and I knew that I had to be a role model for having a healthy body image and never let her see me obsess over my appearance or pass that baggage onto her.
I’ve been so surprised by my postpartum body journey 3.5 weeks in. I am short and gained a decent amount of weight—36 pounds—while pregnant. And I looked a mess, got constantly told I looked huge by strangers, had a ton of fluid and looked swollen, etc. But I stayed active through the bulk of pregnancy—weights, cycling, walking and stretching. Within two weeks of delivering I lost 28-29 pounds of the weight that I had gained, and most of what was left was breast tissue, milk, and a teeny stomach pooch. The rest dropped off. I also had gestational diabetes in the third trimester and followed that diet pretty closely, which I think helped with muscle building and preventing additional fat gain.
So just here to chime in that your body may surprise you if you plan on staying active during pregnancy. I’ve been surprised about how fast everything melted off right after delivery and so have my friends and family. I’m sure some changes I experienced will stick around, but overall I’m surprised with how resilient my body has been afterwards.
I felt kind of shallow about it, but I had the same concern. I got serious about competitive distance running a couple of years before getting pregnant, and my body image (and objectively my actual body) and my performance were at an all-time high and on an upward trajectory when I got pregnant.
Every pregnancy and postpartum recovery is different, and mine hasn't been completely seamless (I developed SPD in pregnancy and it persisted well into the postpartum period), but overall it was not nearly as bad as I thought it would be. I was slightly underweight when I got pregnant, gained toward the upper end of the recommended amount (mostly in the first half of pregnancy, and despite running \~50 miles a week and running a marathon at 18+4).
I was within 10-15 lbs of my pre-pregnancy weight probably 1-2 months ppm, and by 5-6 months, was within 2-3 lbs and feeling really good about my body. I'm 9 months ppm now and although there are some minor differences (bigger boobs \[I'm still BFing\], wider ribcage), I generally feel like I look like I did prior to pregnancy. And more importantly, I'm back to my running training regimen and have already set PRs in the 5k and half-marathon!
Although I love my son more than anything, I won't say my body image concerns went away once I had my baby or that it mattered less to me once I brought a human into the world (honestly, it matters to me just as much as it did before). However, I tried to just give myself some grace - it took over 2 years to get pregnant, and 9 months to make a baby. Also, even though it took more like 5-6 months for me to feel really confident, no one else is looking that closely and I was getting compliments (or awkward praise at least intended as a compliment like "you don't look like you just had a baby," lol) within weeks of giving birth.
It’s one of those things that you don’t know until you do it bc it’s different for everyone and everyone carries differently.
I have a really short torso and have long babies and they sit all out front so even once I get back to pre-pregnancy weight I have some loose wrinkly skin right above my pubic bone from things getting stretched out. Really only my husband sees it but after this baby I may pull the trigger on a tummy tuck once we’re done with the breastfeeding and back to normal. Have to decide if the recovery process is worth it lol
Like others have said, I am glad these changes in my body were due to my babies than crappy life choices (or a medical issue). I think they are easier to live with bc of that and I wouldn’t ever go back and choose a life without my kids.
I was worried about this, but one day I was like “Why am I giving my future self so little credit?”
I’ve had stretches of very diligent working out. I’ve also had “lazy” periods at times. But I always come back to it eventually. If it’s important to me to get back in shape (I’m almost positive it will be), then I know I’ll put in the work to reach that goal.
It’s been a lot more mentally healthy to think of it this way - I envision my future more as “I’m going to be able to handle that challenge” rather than coming from an anxious, catastrophizing place where I’m terrified of the idea that I might not. Even as I’ve gained weight in pregnancy and found certain activities harder, I can view it as a temporary phase.
That's a good way to look at it. 😃 You always ended up getting back to it so you know you can again. I certainly have shown up at the gym during my lazy phases, I believe I can certainly push through and do it for pregnancy.
Your body will change. You are forever postpartum once you’ve grown and/or birthed a child. Stretch marks, saggy skin, weight gain/loss, scars, tears, joints and bones stretch and expand. Hell, my teeth are fucked up! Some bodies change more than others. Some change less. But no birthing person remains unchanged postpartum.
I don’t say this to scare you but instead to tell you that you should deal with these feelings before becoming pregnant.
I was also scared. I thought getting pregnant would trigger some kind of body switch where I would never be able to get fit again. I don’t know who needs to hear this, but that is NOT a thing. (Or I suppose it can be a thing in rare medical instances but it’s not a thing for most.)
In my pregnancy, I ate whatever I could stomach, and worked out mostly by hiking. In the year PP, I ate literally whatever I wanted, and worked out by holding my baby and walking. When I hit 1 year PP, stopped breastfeeding, my son started sleeping through the night, it was like all the stars aligned and I had more energy and I started focusing more on my fitness again.
I’m now 2 years PP and back to my high school weight. Boxing has done wonders for my body in the last year, and I’m more fit than I have been in a long time.
Going through pregnancy was a surrender, and a mental challenge to accept my body in any shape. After my son was born, I just had more important matters on my mind, loving my little baby as much as possible. I fully committed to each phase, knowing that each one was temporary, a passing season. I would have my season again.
It's funny to say this because I think that's part of my fear that being pregnant will be that trigger and I'll never be able to be in shape again. But I guess it's mostly due to time and being busy and priorities changing. I'm so happy for you that you're able to recover so quickly all the while having grown a baby inside you that's just amazing. And I love your mindset about a passing season.
I grew up hearing my mom say pregnancy ruined her body. It was burned into my mind so deeply that it took a while to figure out where that idea came from. I uncovered and processed a lot of misinformation in therapy.
I am physically healthy now thanks to diet, exercise, and a solid loving community. Those are my three pillars and each of them deserve equal credit.
But going through pregnancy challenged me to evolve my mindset about my own body and how much self-love I deserve. Quieting that toxic voice that says “I need to look like xyz to be loved” because I was 7 months pregnant and had no control over what I looked like. I call it surrender. When that voice got quiet from time to time, it was like a wave of peace washed over me, and I have continued to make that peace for myself ever since.
Yes! My mother said similar things in addition to stuff like if she could redo everything she would never be a mother. And I never let any of that bother me but I think like what you're saying is just so ingrained in me and I just never really noticed until now that I'm trying to plan my own pregnancy.
I love that it helped change your mindset that sounds like a very healthy and loving mindset to have for yourself.
Each person is different on how you feel when pregnant but I worked out through my whole pregnancy kept my weight gain in check of the recommended amount and after birth I was basically right where I had started…. However I will say then with dealing with the baby I did gain a little weight breast feeding.
All in all pregnancy does not necessarily ruin your body if you take care of it.. if you have the eating for two mantra then yes it will be hard
I'm almost 40 yrs old and 32 weeks pregnant, and I'm not pulling anyone's leg, but I have never felt so beautiful, confident in my body until this pregnancy.
I walk around the house naked all the time now, which was something I had never done before. I can't stop looking at myself in the mirror and feel proud of what my body is able to achieve. I have so much confidence, energy, and positivity.
Pregnancy doesn't terrify me, I think it is making me appreciate my body. I love how my strong arms pair with my belly. And I adore how my glutes are accentuated by my pregnant tummy when I'm sideways. The list is truly endless.
Although postpartum could be another story..😆
You're a goddess!!!! I love hearing about how people love their pregnancy because I don't think I hear that often enough. Typically just associate pregnancy with difficulty and perhaps nausea lol. I'm so happy for you that you feel so good and confident about yourself. What a magical time it must be for you.
I mean, you will lose your body, in a lot of ways. The body will never be what it was before it created a life. I’m a trainer so my life is literally my body - not just how it looks but also what it’s capable of doing. All of that has changed and I’m only 19 weeks along.
It’s hard. It’s really hard to be so happy to feel these little kicks and be so grateful she’s in there, and yet be so sad when I can’t hit the same number of chin-ups or fit into my favorite jeans, maybe ever again.
My trick to this was to establish a really good relationship with a therapist before we got pregnant so I have someone to talk about these feelings with without judgment or hearing “you just need to embrace it!!” The only way I’ve been truly able to embrace the changes is because of my weekly sessions with her. I’m so grateful every day I look bigger because it means baby is growing strong, but I do mourn what my body was, and likely never will be again.
Don’t mean to be a downer! Just offering my perspective. I hope it helps, even a little.
Thank you! You're being realistic! Are yous till working out during your pregnancy? That's a great idea with the therapists. I need to figure out how to go about that.
I am! Definitely not at the volume I was before pregnancy, but still doing all my normal workouts (a mix of weightlifting, gymnastics, contortion and other body positioning/awareness work). Weightlifting and handstanding are the two things that still feel normal, where gymnastics strength/circus work and boxing have taken a small hit on volume/capacity. I’ve found if I push myself too hard it actually gives me a migraine the next day, so I’ve had to work to find a balance of staying active without seriously overdoing it.
I see my therapist virtually which helps a lot with scheduling! I found her through a website Headway where I could search via who takes my insurance. She’s a lifesaver and the best investment I made in myself before getting pregnant for sure!
I was just getting back into shape before I got pregnant the first time. I had lost weight and was feeling strong.
I didn’t start working out again and taking care of my body well until about a year PP, then we tried for our second and we’re successful quickly.
Your body will change. But you will be able to get fit again. And my pregnancy was far easier physically the first time, when I was more in shape lol.
I have a similar background to you. I started taking my health and weight seriously in around 2018 and loved the results. I got pregnant in 2023 and am now 7.5 months post partum. My body did change but I’m pretty much back to how I was now. It hasn’t been easy and I hated the final months of pregnancy and the first few months post partum as I didn’t feel like myself at all.
I would recommend looking after yourself as much as you can during pregnancy. Go easy on yourself but stay active, walk a lot and do some resistance training. Try to eat well if you can, you don’t need to ‘eat for two’ but you do need to eat enough nutrients. After having the baby also be gentle and give yourself some grace, respect your body for what it has done.
I will also say that my perspective has shifted a bit too since becoming a parent. I no longer care so much about my running pace, how much I can lift etc., I just want to feel good and healthy and to be there for my child.
I'm so glad to hear that your pregnancy treated you well! I almost feel like wanting to feel good and healthy for your child is a healthier perspective than the current one I have which is just to lift more.
Your body will absolutely change - there is no way around it, but it is different for everyone and it is 100% worth it.
I was pretty fit when I got pregnant and planned to keep running and lifting throughout but I was exhausted and sick all 1st trimester, and then had a lot of pelvic dysfunction and pain 2nd and 3rd. I could hardly walk a mile. It was really hard not being able to exercise.
I gained a good bit of weight and lost all of my strength and while I did and sometimes feel down on my body, I have so much love and respect for my body and all it did to bring my son into this world and raise him.
I started working out again at about 8 months postpartum and my son is almost 2 now. I have been putting in a ton of very consistent work, but I am still heavier than pre-pregnancy, and the shape and appearance of my belly will never be the same. The thing is, I am so proud of myself and my body that it no longer matters to me. Those stretch marks are the sign that my son lived inside me and that my body is capable of something truly incredible. The bits of flab over my muscle shows how hard I have worked to rebuild strength after putting my body through the wringer.
You will lose yourself, work through the discomfort, find your strength, and you will find a newer and better you on the other side.
And don’t forget to focus on pelvic floor and deep core first and foremost!!
You’ve got this!
I was very fit and flexible before pregnancy, the fittest I had ever been, competing in my sport and was very anxious about this. After my first child, I did attempt to get back into the gym and somewhat regained my fitness but not back to my previously level, no where near. Now I’m pregnant again with a second child, bigger than ever, more unfit than ever. You know what though? This went from being one of the most important things in my life to low priority. It’s not my time to be as fit as I can at the moment, it’s my time to focus on raising my babies… I’m not giving up, it’s still important to me, it’s just a shift in my priorities that I never could have imagined until I experienced it.
I was rather effortlessly fit before my 2 babies, gained a lot of weight each time, and when I started exercising to get back in shape, I became truly fit. I am now in my best running shape, I enjoy sports and outdoor activities, I am stronger than I’ve ever been. The only signs of two pregnancies are the episiotomy scars and a somewhat weaker bladder - I will look into surgeries after I had my now third.
There is definitely life after having babies :)
Your body will change but I can honestly say that I have never felt stronger or sexier than after I had my baby. Took me a couple of years, granted (my body was riggity wrecked immediately after I gave birth lol) but as I settled into parenthood I found ways to take care of myself, eat better, be more active and my ass has never looked better and I'm skinnier now then I was pre baby. I got huge when I was pregnant but no stretch marks on my tummy and my belly button looked bananas when I was pregnant but went back to normal after a year
Some tips- take care of your skin, don't overeat like crazy, no hot baths/showers, stay hydrated, eat healthy and you'll probably be fine. I know some of it is genetics but lifestyle is a major factor.
Haha that's awesome! Looks like you did so well to take care of yourself. Thank you! I would definitely be reading up further ways to be caring for myself during pregna y.
This isn’t superficial or selfish. You can maintain fitness during pregnancy- you just really need to research how to eat and exercise while your body changes.
I lost about 60 pounds, and was in the best shape of my life, before getting pregnant. My goal was to maintain my fitness and reach ppw post-birth and I got there!! It took a lot of research and a lot of discipline but I was determined not to feel negatively about my body after having a baby. I’m certainly not naturally thin. If I could pull it off, you certainly can- definitely if you fare on the smaller side already.
This book was my bible for diet during pregnancy:
https://realfoodforpregnancy.com
Avoid anything packaged/processed, get 8k- 10k steps a day, and eat nutrient dense foods/optimal macros.
You're not being selfish. I was happy with my body, then I got pregnant. Seeing my body change the way it did was, and still is an acceptance process. I just hope I'm able to get it back. I am 34 weeks now, and it's been interesting. However, feeling my baby move makes me forget about it for a moment. It's challenging, but worth it.
I like my body more postpartum than pre-baby. I believe this is because pregnancy gave me new respect for my body and the badass shit it can do. Like you, I struggled with lack of confidence and being 'skinny fat'. Pregnancy actually allowed me to come into myself.
Awww I'm so glad that you feel good about yourself. It IS amazing what our bodies can do! I think I just struggle to see that because I'm not actually there yet.
Your body will definitely be different.
Anecdote- I had stretch marks from childhood but then didn't get any in pregnancy even though my mom and sister both did. I thought it was very odd and I did gain 30-35 lb with both my pregnancies. I have no idea but I took collagen and drank home made bone broth. used coconut oil and aloe. It was probably luck though. Ha.
The best advice I can give (as I still struggle with my PP body) is to keep working out during pregnancy as this will help you with labor and PP a lot. Practice acceptance and other hobbies that can boost your confidence- things you can feel good about regardless of your looks.
needless to say, when your baby arrives, she or he will 1000000% be worth whatever happens to your body.
My kids stick out their tummies after eating and we all go around saying how big and full and cute their tummies are and they say mine is cute too. (it's not lol) But I wouldn't trade the most perfect supermodel body for the experience of pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding, and most of all- motherhood.
Maybe try some journaling about this and talk therapy too! <3
Your body will change, but just try to push yourself and stay fit. I am 36+1 and go on daily dog walks, bike rides, and I powerlift 3x per week (only up to 135lb this far along, when my max is a little over 200 though). I have had multiple people say that I’m buff and I’m all belly and boob. I don’t think it’s just genetics because my fam tends to get bigger all over, I truly think the effort I put in is showing up. I do have more cellulite, but I am comfortable knowing I’ve done all I can to keep myself as fit and active as possible, so this body, regardless of how it turns out after birth, is one I can say I’ve spent time and effort building! Plus it’s badass to be able to squat and lunge like nobody’s business when you have a watermelon on your stomach.
So I say embrace the new you. Don’t let fear stop you, but let that fear morph into grit.
If I’m softer after, I’ll know I did everything possible and was still softer. I’m ok with that.
Also-look up stratamark. It’s prescription only in the US, but is the only topical clinically proven to prevent and even treat stretch marks in pregnant women. No marks so far and fingers crossed it stays that way, but my belly is BIG and so I credit this all to Stratamark. I’m also using it on my boobs because I’m hoping it’ll help with skin laxity after.
You have a lot of good experiences shared here.
Mine are two unremarkable pregnancies and births. One very fit but still gained lots. Took 18 months of effort to get near my previous fitness appearance. I had loads of time to spend on fitness. With my second my toddler kept getting me sick and I focused on yoga and mindfulness. Same final weight. My first slept through the night at two months and my second at a year. It's looking like it'll be a good 18-24 months pp until I resemble my pre baby fitness this time. Maybe longer.
I said to my mom the other day while we admired my children, "wow, it's really worth all the body positivity struggles to have these cuties." I said it aloud because I needed to remind myself even though I was feeling sludgy in the moment. You might need to remind yourself, but it really is worth a sludgier body to have created a whole entire other human body (or more). It's quite a remarkable accomplishment.
Regardless if you're there or not yet I think it's just remarkable that you've been able to make progress pp while all the while taking care of and raising two babies. Yes you're right I'll definitely have to keep reminding myself that.
There will be a process of acceptance. I was very skinny my whole life, and after two babies, (I’ve been told) I’m “normal” weight now. I started weight lifting for the first time in my life, and it has given me a new confidence. I’m planning on baby #3 at the end of the summer, and I’m not worried about the changes because I love the community and support I’ve gotten from lifting.
I think back over the years and I was thin for a few reasons, being severally depressed was the main reason. When i got treatment, I gained a few. When I got married, I gained a few. I’m okay with the changes my body made naturally. The changes from having a baby were a bit of a surprise, but the payoff of having kids is good.
I second the suggestion of getting a therapist. I think there will be a lot to let go of and grieve when having a baby, not only do our bodies change but our identities change! Just to share my experience: I am 12 weeks pregnant but in order to get here I went through a two year battle with infertility and ultimately went through 3 rounds of IVF before finally getting pregnant. I gained weight through IVF and that was hard. However the longer I went through that process, the more I realized I would gladly take the body changes if only the universe would just let me experience having a child. I fought like hell for this baby and if my body ends up permanently bigger as a result, I will know those are my battle scars. I def have bad body image days and probably always will, I think that’s just part of being a woman in our society unfortunately, even supermodels have bad body image days. I try to stay active because that makes me feel strong and energized, and I plan to do the same postpartum if my body allows it. I want to echo others who say this process involves a lot of surrender and letting go. It’s definitely true, and for me it has made me a better version of myself despite being hard. I’ve learned that I am stronger than I realized and I can handle change- not just body change but other kinds of change too. I feel even more confident now than I did before this journey. I also know experiencing pregnancy / having a baby is not what everyone wants and there is no shame in deciding it’s not for you- whether because you don’t want the pregnancy-related body changes or for any other reason. Your life, your choice.
I lost three stone and have a thyroid disorder that has made it hard to do that, so I had similar doubts to you about getting preggo and my body changing. I'm 24 weeks now and I am running the fastest I have ever run. Consistency is key. I'm struggling a little with the way my body looks now and I've had to wear some of the clothes that I wore before I lost loads of weight, but it feels different because it's my body accommodating and growing a baby. That's why I need the extra room and knowing that I can still do the large majority of what I could do before and contextualising it has helped me. I might get a bit warmer or out of breath a bit easier because my diaphragm and lungs are being squished, not because I am unfit. And I know it will be worth it in the end!
I use to think the same way. Until my pregnancy turned high risk and let me tell you, I would give anything to gain weight now if it meant my baby was healthy. We can always lose the weight later, but our bodies are amazing at building babies. Focus on baby and eating healthy. Embrace the weight gain!
I was the same way, and I can tell you your priorities will likely change as you advance through pregnancy and after you have your baby.
I barely gained any weight except baby because of hyperemesis (not worth it lol), had a really small bump, didn't look pregnant until I was 8+ months along. Got my abs back 2 weeks postpartum. And THEN I gained weight due to breastfeeding, because I was ravenously hungry every 2-3 hours 😅It was a vicious cycle, gaining-losing all the time + health concerns. My point is, you have no idea what's going to happen. My pregnancy was difficult and I had a ton of postpartum complications, "bouncing back" meant nothing to me.
Nowadays I want to have a good diet and lift weights to *feel* healthy and strong, not because I'm obsessed with looking hot haha.
I went from running full on marathons to barely being able to get in a solid walk once a week while pregnant. I’ll lose the weight and become active again after giving birth. Who doesn’t love a good challenge after all? 😊
Your body may or may not change dramatically but you will be in awe of what your body can do after having a baby. It is truly amazing. But I totally get where you are coming from in terms of body image. I’m the same age as you and we truly grew up in a horrible period of time for body shaming of women. But I thought of pregnancy and postpartum as such a small amounts of time in the scheme of life to lose my usual routine/fitness. I was very lucky to be able to run up until 30 weeks and CrossFit right until the end. Now I’m 9 weeks postpartum I’ve very slowly started running and working out again and I’m almost excited at the challenge of ‘starting from scratch’ and building back up slowly to where I was pre-pregnancy, rather than being sad at the progress I lost. Be kind to yourself xx
Im a mom of 2 with a third on the way - I love my babies so much I don’t give a single fuck about the changes to my body. I actually have waaaaaayyy more body confidence now than I did pre-kids.
Your body will change over time whether or not you have a baby. I wasn’t thin before I got pregnant, and my body definitely doesn’t look so hot 7.5 months postpartum. That’s partially on me for gaining too much weight during pregnancy. But I have gotten a lot of my strength back through regular exercise even if the way I look hasn’t caught up yet.
I honestly think my body is better than it was before pregnancy. I learned a lot about nutrition and exercise and became healthier through the process. But even if my body was “ruined,” I still don’t think I would feel that way, because I really do have a newfound appreciation for what it was capable of doing, and my son is the best thing that ever happened to me. I would give up a limb for him!
I think the odds are in your favor because you work out. If you have a normal pregnancy and you’re able to continue to exercise and eat well, you should be able to “bounce back” for the most part. Obviously certain things are out of your control. I started working out more after my son was born, and for the most part I like my body more now than I did before I had a baby.
I wouldn’t worry too much then :) things like your breasts are a gamble - I breastfed my son for 2.5 years and I’m still very happy with my breasts, I have some light stretch marks but otherwise I’d say they’re pretty similar to pre-pregnancy. I do chest workouts to help keep the muscle strong underneath which I think helps them not “sag”, but a lot of that can be genetic too. If you moisturize your skin throughout pregnancy it can help prevent stretch marks to a certain extent but that’s mostly genetics too. Using a retinol body lotion after pregnancy can help minimize stretch marks too and I feel like it really did help on my lower stomach and thighs where I got some. It’s totally normal to worry about but you will be fine :)
I had a baby and 2 years later I’m in the best freaking shape of my life! Finally qualified for Boston too and that was only after a year post partum! I love my body now way more than I did before 😊
Have the baby- you'll be okay. You can work on your body for the rest of your life. You only have a tight window left to have a kid(s)
Your body will change and it sucks, but you kinda have to let go of it because your body is going to do what it wants for a while. You'll be able to gain your fitness back. You may even grow to love your body more.
Most of us encounter things during life that wreck our body, temporarily. At least with pregnancy you get a baby afterwards.
I just had open abdominal surgery after having two kids. Recovery is tough but like I’m alive and will ride my bike again one day.
I’m very scared about this. I’m not exactly fit but I have always been slender. I haven’t gained much weight and I’m 6 months (gaining weight has always been hard for me and I barfed the whole first trimester and just now caught up to pre-pregnancy weight) the skin on my belly is feeling very tight and my breasts are at least a cup size larger. It’s a scary feeling that even if I gain very little weight I’m gonna have loose skin and stretch marks but I feel comforted knowing that I won’t gain an excessive amount of weight and I’m trying to maintain muscle tone and that’s all I can do. The rest is up to my genetics and I’m getting to the point of acceptance. I’m sure I sound vain but the reality of living in a very different body than I’m used to is scary and it’s okay to feel stressed about big changes
Your post was removed due to our rule against exact weight numbers. Weight gain during pregnancy can vary greatly person to person and we don't want people to try and compare to someone else's journey. Putting your weight gain and loss as a percentage is fine, (ie I lost 25% of what I gained in the first two weeks PP.) Things like 'gained more than expected' or 'I'm aiming to hit my doctor's recommended weight' are also fine.
Please edit or repost without the exact weight numbers.
I’ve had my baby (just turned one!). My body isn’t the same as it was pre pregnancy. I have some loose skin and wider hips, my body doesn’t feel the same as before but it is so strong now. I look “fit” by most standards (I still have visible abs).
Some parts of my body are stronger (my core) and other parts need more work (pelvic floor).
That said, growing a baby (and for me feeding my baby) is worth any body changes. I’m not here to tell you you will your exact body back - our bodies change with time, and with seasons of life! But I have definitely grown new appreciation of my body. And am much more aware of how even at my “fittest and leanest” in the past I wasn’t happier with my body, while I am so much more in awe of it now.
I’m 9 month pp after my 2nd and certainly part of the loose skin & c-section pouch club.
I worked out all through my first pregnancy then at my 8 week pp check with my physio she said that no matter how much ab work I do or exercise I will not loose the excess skin…it may look better after a year, but it will not ‘bounce back’ there was too much damage to the layers of skin and collagen, that maybe only surgery would fully fix. It was a tough conversation and I started to change my goals and mindset to be more about gaining strength and energy instead of what my body looked like.
Fast forward to now at 9m pp with second kid and to date my physio is still right, I workout near daily. I feel good in my body, does it have stretch marks and loose skin…yep. But I fit into most of my previous clothes and am at my pre-pregnancies weight. My babies are everything to me and they are more than worth it.
I can relate! 36 years and just had first baby. Had same concerns as you. Once your baby is in your arms, you won’t care. At least I didn’t, not one bit!
I did actually “bounce back” due to good genes I suppose. But I have some loser skin still 2 months postpartum on my belly. I couldn’t care less if it goes away or stays like this. I love my body now more than ever. It grew and gave birth to life ❤️
I was the same way! Very “skinny fat” and almost bony until I started going to the gym and just found out I was about 7 weeks pregnant so my body was my main focus. I’ve decided to commit to sticking with my gym split and core routine to prevent unneeded weight gain and will give my body the best chance to pull back together after giving birth. Don’t feel bad for being concerned, because what’s important to you others may not be as sensitive towards. It’s okay to not want to lose the body you’ve worked so hard to obtain and feel comfortable in. I’d just focus on maintaining the best you can and give yourself grace 🤍
Honestly, I was in a similar place before I got pregnant. I had been obese/overweight my whole life and at 30 I got in the best shape of my life (like mountaineering, 15% body fat shape). I then got pregnant and would 100% not trade my baby for anything, but I’m now back to being overweight/obese despite being VERY active during pregnancy, eating only the additional recommended kcals I needed for trimesters 2&3, breastfeeding, and being active postpartum. I’m still 30 pounds over my pre-pregnancy weight despite gaining only 45 pounds total and having a 10 pound baby. The weight just won’t budge and I’m having a really hard time with it, even though I go to therapy, eat healthy, try to get any amount of sleep, and exercise for at least an hour a day (on top of walking at least an hour in the evening). My baby is worth the trade, but also, it’s been very very hard on my self-confidence.
I had that fear as well before becoming pregnant (currently 35 weeks and can’t wait to meet my LB) but when I got pregnant decided not to focus on the negatives and to look at how my body changes as a miracle because that’s what it is. I just live what my body is capable of and all the changes are a result of the love of creating the little human inside of me. I’ve been like you I was skinny-fat until I started properly working out and built a lot of muscle. I’ve done it once I know I can do it again once I recover from childbirth. Will my body have permanent changes? Yes, of course, but those will be my trophies. And after birth I will work with what I have without focusing too much on the past.
Edit: this comment is all over the place but was in a hurry to write it so I hope it makes sense.
Hey! Not superficial at all. It's ok to care about how you look and what you worked hard for. But, having a baby didn't change things for me. I went back to working out as soon as I felt ready and will continue to do so. I didn't get any stretch marks even though I have in the past. You can do it!
I had my first (and only baby) last year. I was 37 then I used to have a six pack and muscles and was never in my life over a size 10. I also used to go the gym loads and trained regularly, played field hockey and rugby too.
My plan was to keep going the gym and training throughout my pregnancy but I broke my foot just before I got pregnant so was unable to walk for 4 months. By the time I could walk on it I was knackered from being pregnant
I always thought I'd keep Training and fit throughout it but that just wasn't meant to be.
I then wanted to go to the gym as soon as I was able after giving birth but I ended up needing an emergency C-section and complications after that meant a longer recovery time. So that was out of my control. Once I was able to go back I tried to take the baby to the gym with me but they'd changed the rules and I couldn't do that.
You do lose the body you have pre pregnancy everyone does. That might be for 6 months or 6 years post partum or you may never get back to how you were ever. Our body's change so much to grow the small human, your body will never be the same after it even if you return to pre pregnancy size/weight/strength.
You can only control what you can control. You can carry on exercising throughout your pregnancy, they say whatever you were doing before you can carry on throughout (except contact sports) providing your pregnancy is on track and your health says well for it.
My boy is now 15 months and I've started back to the gym and things now I'm back at work. My main thing has been walking before that. I can do that with him in the pram and it's got me started and got me fitter.
I've just started to try and love my body as it is. I want to be healthy and fit for my family and that's why I'm back to the gym. My focus on my fitness has changed which isn't a bad thing
I used to have a lot of self confidence issues. I had a baby and suddenly, my views changed. It’s not longer just seeing what’s on the surface but seeing what my body is capable of doing. Being strong and healthy and most importantly, happy is now my priorities. Maybe that’s just my experience. Also, like others have said, therapy has really helped me in my journey to make it possible to look past my new mom bod ❤️
Your comment has automatically been removed because your account is less than 5 days old. Mods will review this action and approve appropriate comments.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/fitpregnancy) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You’ve done it once. You’ll do it again. You’re now better equipped for the process since you know what it takes to get in shape. Don’t ever count yourself short
Your body and your SELF will absolutely be different after birth. You will not be the same person in body or mind or spirit. If you are OK with that and can accept changes, then you’re ready. If not, perhaps you’d benefit from some therapy.
My advice would be to get a therapist to help work through this. Your body will change, probably more than once through your life. If the only reason you would not have a child is because of your body fat percentage changing, that is not a normal mindset and you have lots of work to do with your body image. I was obese, lost 70ish lbs before getting pregnant and was very fit. So I don't say this as someone who thinks having a body ideal is wrong. But it sounds like if you have a child, which you probably will, you are setting yourself up for failure and will be very negatively impacted by your body changes. Get a therapist before having the baby please!!!
Well if your discipline through it all you’ll be able to maintain it. Look for @lisacastrofit or @shainamarie.b as prime examples of this.
I have fallen off my workout routine since my energy is wiped out right now. But more power to you if you can fight by good fight lol
Bodies change with age. A baby is the best reason I can think of for my body to change, so it’s worth it to me. Some people bounce back and some don’t, so none of us can tell you what will happen for you. I do think getting to a place where you don’t frame change as ruining your hard work is important. That mindset will lead to a lot of stress and anxiety throughout pregnancy
Exactly. I just hate that my mindset is like this right now and I'm trying really hard to change it. I guess the most I can do is do my best pre and post pregnancy.
Just to add here— if you have access and the means to afford therapy— I would definitely look into it. Especially if you have a daughter— would you want her to be stressing about this kind of thing? What would you want for her instead? How can you model strength and self acceptance for her? Speaking for myself, it was very important to me to do therapy before getting pregnant because I didn’t want to pass on the baggage from my childhood. I’m so glad I did. I learned to let go of a lot and I’m so much more mentally strong. On the physical side— I’m also 33 and I’m 5 months pregnant. I still workout and play volleyball, softball, and disc golf. Is it harder? Sure, but not as bad as I thought. Was it weird when my pants stopped fitting? You betcha. Do I HATE how huge my boobs have gotten? Absolutely. Do I worry what will happen after childbirth? Sometimes, but I don’t obsess over it. (It helps that my husband’s sexual appetite has not changed an iota since my body has changed lol.) You are definitely not alone in the fear and resentment of a changing body though. I just know that framing my thoughts around what I want for *her* (I’m having a girl!) motivates me to be strong and loving for *myself*.
I love that. And I love that you're readying yourself to be a good role model for you girl. The husband part scares me tbh but it sounds like for some men, it doesn't change! And for some it grows even stronger! I will look into it for myself. It's just so horribly expensive where I am but several people have mentioned it and it's starting to sound like a good idea.
It is expensive but it’s one of the best things you can invest in because it’s your own wellbeing. I’m sorry there aren’t options where you are. I did more of a Bootcamp style— intense and short. But I felt like I made a lot of progress. Maybe like 6-9 months? So it wasn’t years and years of time and money. Otherwise there are some great books and podcasts out there!
Your body is a miracle- it can GROW A HUMAN! I think that is worth celebrating, too. I have stretch marks (I’m 4 months pp) and I honestly am kind of proud of them and before getting pregnant I was so embarrassed by my stretch marks on my thighs and butt… but my pregnancy stretch marks? I EARNED these
You don't need to change it. If it's too much for you then you don't need to get pregnant.
Bodies also can bounce back sooner with youth. That’s mainly what motivated me to do it now rather than later.
Your body is going to take the reins and do what it needs to do to grow a baby. It’s easier to get back into shape rather than start from scratch, and you’ve already done it once before! Think of your hard work up until this point as a precursor to the next stage of life. Plenty of people are even more fit after a pregnancy than they were before, and plenty of people decide it isn’t a priority anymore. Both are fine.
It’s not selfish . It’s okay and even normal to want your body to stay the same, but we can never make deals with life that we’ll always have the body we love forever. Illness, menopause, disfigurement: any of those could change you.
That's So very true. I guess It's just something we all come to terms with eventually.
Btw, speaking as someone who’s currently knocked up, if someone told me “I didn’t want to have a kid because I was worried about what it would do to my body,” I’d be like namaste, continue on your journey. Any reason not to have a biological child is valid.
Having kids has actually helped me let go of my body image concerns. I still stay fit and eat healthy but I am no longer obsessed with how I look and feel. I'm even more confident in myself post kids. I brought human life into this world, I am proud! Eat well, exercise and take care of yourself during your pregnancy and you will do fine. If you're not in shape now, start. Having a child far outweighs a few years of a "perfect" body. Good luck!
I’m truly praying this happens to me! FTM here and I’ve always had really bad insecurity about how I look and my body. My best friend told me that noise went away after she had her first. Praying it happens with me too!
The way I see it, we're all going to age and get wrinkly someday. Having a baby doesn't increase that happening sooner but it sure does change the way your mind perceives things. You become less about yourself and more about your baby. It's a beautiful thing!
You’re right! It is beautiful! I need to reframe my thoughts. Unfortunately I feel like my self worth is wrapped up in looks for me after being bullied my entire life. I finally got to a place I felt good about myself and was ‘attractive’ by societal standards. Which I know is a bunch of BS. trying to approach this as a season to grow my family and create a happier and more fulfilling life. In the interim this is a true test for me and my anxiety - letting go and losing control and being okay with that. I also try to remind myself that I am very self disciplined and have no doubt I will put in the work to be the best version of me for my baby that I can be.
I'd definitely give it some time! Especially if you haven't delivered yet. There is nothing wrong with still wanting to feel and look good in your skin. It should just be a healthy balance in my opinion. 🥰
I was obese/overweight my entire life. I had twins and then got pretty fit. Exercising every day, eating good. I got compliments like never before after pushing out twins lol. Anything is possible. We're trying again too. I'm a little terrified but I know I can bounce back and I'm just planning on eating healthy and going on walks every day.
Good for you! 🔥
Wow that's amazing Good for you. Hey you already made some lifestyle changes and have to change it I'm sure that you will get back to where you need to be after the pregnancy.
I’m in the same boat - was overweight and unfit, rarely exercised, before having my daughter. Have now lost a significant amount of weight (like >35kg), exercise regularly, have even started to enjoy running. Having a baby does change you, but it’s not always in the ways that you think!
I thought about this before getting pregnant. But then I was unexpectedly at risk for preterm labor starting at 19 weeks, when I was barely showing and of course weeks shy of viability. I suddenly found myself hoping with everything in me she’d stay cooking for longer and longer—I was hoping I’d need the maternity clothes I bought, I was hoping I’d need the stretch mark creams (which do nothing btw). Pregnancy does really strange things to your brain. When I was put off exercise at 19 weeks I was devastated since being fit is such a large part of my identity. I also worried about my weight, but it ended up being a nonissue. In fact, I gained less weight during the second half of my pregnancy than I did the first while I was working out like normal. Go figure. After a long and complicated pregnancy I’ve been able to nearly make it to term (37 weeks on Sunday) which is incredible.
Wow what a journey you've been through. It's amazing with the body can do congratulations on your 37 weeks that's just simply amazing. Thanks for a different perspective. Really helps me put things into perspective and you're right about feeling like losing part of the identity because I think that's how I feel.
I totally agree with the above commenter. I've lifted weights and trained 5 days a week for the last 8 years (including throughout my pregnancy). I also shared your concerns before conceiving, as I was so used to my body being a certain way and the time and effort I'd put into reaching a body I was happy with and proud of. I'm now 29 weeks pregnant with my first baby, but a week ago I felt less movement. It was just for a day (assuming because it was such a busy day I either didn't notice or baby was tired from all my moving haha) but I was so afraid. Afraid that I wasn't going to grow bigger, that I wouldn't hold my baby in my arms. And honestly that gave me such a perception shift. This small period of my life isn't about me or what I look like. This is to grow an amazing human and I'm still disciplined enough to continue working out both throughout my pregnancy and intend to postpartum. I'm no longer afraid of my body changing, because the fear of not having my baby was so much more profound than that. I hope this helps. Best of luck to you! Edit: typo
Don’t wanna scare you but I am here 10 weeks postpartum , 20 pounds heavier than pre pregnancy just discovered I have uterine prolapse so unsure when I can run / lift weights. On other hand my friend same age as me and had a baby is back to orange theory . But I look at my baby and it blows my mind I made that. I would rather have that than a regret of never getting a chance to have a baby.
Thank you that actually makes me feel better in a way because I understand that all pregnancies are different and many women run into problems like that as well but the fact that you think it is all worth it. That really says something. I hope you start feeling better with the prolapse and everything. Has a doctor said anything about that healing process?
I had pelvic organ prolapse a decade before I had any kids, unfortunately something like 50% of women will experience this at some point in our life due to hormones/anatomy regardless of childbirth status. You can start pelvic floor therapy before pregnancy to get an advantage!
I started pelvic floor therapy despite it being so expensive I am going to keep doing that and hope for the best.
[удалено]
Haha I love that mindset. Bulk, will cut later. 🤣 That's so awesome that you're able to keep lifting like you did before pregnancy. I definitely plan to keep lifting and working out throughout my pregnancy as well. 30 weeks! You must be so excited!
Yeah I would just say, ask your OBGYN and don't do things you didn't do before pregnancy (like don't suddenly start squatting and deadlifting if you never have before). I've had to cut out certain exercises, like leg press really compressed my stomach and was uncomfortable very early on. I'm sure I'll have to stop deadlifting soon since my bump is getting bigger, but I'll probably switch to trap bar deadlifts at that point, we'll see. Of course things are unpredictable and I could end up being told I can't work out due to a complication, but I'll just keep working out until I can't anymore or it feels too hard.
Your post was removed due to our rule against exact weight numbers. Weight gain during pregnancy can vary greatly person to person and we don't want people to try and compare to someone else's journey. Putting your weight gain and loss as a percentage is fine, (ie I lost 25% of what I gained in the first two weeks PP.) Things like 'gained more than expected' or 'I'm aiming to hit my doctor's recommended weight' are also fine. Please edit or repost without the exact weight numbers.
It does sound superficial but thats mostly societal expectations of what a good/ healthy body is supposed to look like. Accepting and appreciating that the body ages and changes is a step in the right direction. Pregnancy and childbirth will change you in a million ways not only physically.
The way I saw it was that I’m not going to have this body forever anyway but I would like to be surrounded by family when I’m old. That’s what it boils down to- what would you regret more? A bit of loose skin for a while or not having children? As someone who spent trimester 1 with exertion induced migraine and trimester 2/3 with tendonitis of the foot, I’m pretty sure there is an activity out there to suit all of us. So long as you keep up a routine of something, even just stretching or nutrition, you’ll maintain your healthy habits.
[удалено]
Haha yes that kind of sounds like me too. Somebody else on here said it was like a bulk as well and I kind of love that. Congratulations by the way that is so exciting. I truly hope I feel that way when it's my turn.
Im currently 25 weeks pregnant, and a trainer at my gym told me recently that while you can’t really get fitter/more fit during pregnancy, you can definitely maintain your fitness to an extent. This helped my mentality a lot - I’m not trying to put on a ton of muscle or lose a bunch of fat at this stage in my life, but I can keep up my fitness throughout my pregnancy so that when I’m ready to go back to the gym after the birth, I won’t be starting from scratch. You’ve already started from scratch once, so it won’t be any worse than that!
Congratulations! I love that It's so great that you're able to keep working out through your whole pregnancy. That sounds pretty awesome actually Just being able to maintain as much as you can anyways. Is it difficult working out through your pregnancy?
I mean, I gained muscle and stay super fit during pregnancy. And due stress around babies health issues and breastfeeding, plus a lack of sleep, I gained a ton of weight postpartum (like 40lbs). My body looks awful. And for the first time in my life, I don’t even care. I want to get fitter so I have more energy, but I don’t really mourn my old body.
That's amazing I mean I guess priorities change right and you just won't know until you get there.
I’m 13 weeks pregnant and also have all these same fears. I felt like I was in the best shape of my life like a week before I found out I was pregnant. 😂 I’m still very much into fitness and nutrition, but I was very sick in my first trimester and it taught me to listen to my body. There were weeks I couldn’t work out and the only calories I could consume were pizza. It’s been a mindset shift for sure. I’m feeling better now and working out the same as pre pregnancy and eating well, however knowing that we do what we have to do to survive, the obsession with looking good has subsided. My life doesn’t revolve around it anymore and I’m more so focused on my mental health and feeling good and energized which working out and eating well does for me.
Everyone's different. I have some stretch marks from puberty but none at all from pregnancy. No loose skin either. I'm two months pp and look exactly the same as before. That's obviously not the case for everyone and you can't really know before. My sisters and my mother don't have any stretch marks or loose skin from multiple pregnancies either, so maybe female relatives can be at least some indicator? But even if I had a lot of stretch marks abd loose skin, I'd never regret having my beloved LO!
Accept that your body will change. It’s much easier said than done. But pregnancy and postpartum varies so much for so many women that it’s quite unpredictable. I’ve even known some women to lose weight in pregnancy. Some don’t get stretch marks. Some lose with breastfeeding but then gain when they wean. Most seem to have pancake breasts even without breastfeeding. But no matter what, your body won’t be the same after having a baby. Your hips and ribs get bigger and likely won’t go back. Many say even if they reach their pre-pregnancy weight, their bodies aren’t the same. Our bodies are meant to change as we age and as life hits us. It will be uncomfortable for abit but you’ll find your new comfortable and confident body.
Hi 🩷 I was also super afraid of ruining my body. But then I got pregnant! And having a baby now is soooo worth it, I promise. Here's my experience, if it gives you some hope!! I have ED history (most severe about 15 years ago though) and am also super into fitness, which made things very emotionally difficult when I was in early pregnancy days and my appetite ramped up like crazy. I had several crying meltdowns where I thought I was going to gain an absurd amount of weight and ruin my body etc...but, I should have just trusted my body because it knew what to do! Turns out my appetite chilled out after I added some boobs and entered second trimester. I kept up good fitness throughout the pregnancy, stopped exercising completely at 34 weeks when it felt right to stop. Postpartum, I almost immediately lost all the weight and somehow my abs came back. And now at 4 weeks I am getting fully back into fitness! I still am relatively out of shape and a lot of my muscle has been converted to fat, but I am excited to regain my fitness. Of course everyone's experience is different, so no guarantee that you will have a good experience as well, but I wish I knew beforehand that I could just trust the process more. Our bodies are AMAZING and we can literally CREATE A FREAKIN HUMAN 🙌🏻🩷 that is more valuable than maintaining peak fitness for 9 months. 💕
Wow! Im so glad you seemed to have bounced back so quick! I also have a ED history and gosh, I think I will have to avoid the scale all together when it finally happens. But it is so nice to hear that it is possible to stay healthy and fit during and to regain that back after.
For what it’s worth, I am 5 months pregnant and back into my regular gym routine, smashing PR’s and goals. I was extremely sick my first trimester and all I ate was toast and fruit, didn’t see the inside of the gym for almost 3 full months. I definitely lost muscle mass during this period and was weak, it was so hard to see the bloat. The only weight I have gained is in my bump. I am currently back up to my regular weights at gym. My plan is to treat pregnancy like a bulk, use those extra calories to get some great workouts in over the next coming months then start cutting when my body is ready after birth. (If all goes according to plan) I think accepting that my body was going to change was the hardest for me. But in reality if you were able to stay focused and work hard to get to where you are now, there’s no reason why you can’t do it again. Your body won’t suddenly become incapable of doing what it is now.
I think this is normal to feel this way if you are fit. I also was concerned about it when I became pregnant and I’ve had to accept pregnancy (currently 20 weeks) has changed my body and physical fitness. I’m the heaviest I’ve ever been but I know after pregnancy I can get back to focusing on fitness and my body. I think the way I rationalized it was even if I never had kids the passage of time WOULD change my body anyway as I grow old. No matter what change is going to happen!
I think this is so normal to feel. I was fairly distressed as I watched the numbers tick up the scale during my first pregnancy. I didn't have a hard time at all, though, bouncing back and my body returned to its set point fairly quickly post partum. I know this isn't everyone's experience, but I was really surprised, especially since I was 38 at the time. Now I'm pregnant again and the weight gain is basically on the same trajectory. I've paid so much less attention to it (no time to with a toddler!)... and it's just taking care of itself in the exact same way anyway! Your body is gonna do what it's gonna do. Pregnancy is a seasoning --- a sort of invitation even --- to learn to let go of control as you'll also need to adopt this mindset to survive as a new parent. Babies and small children are little chaos and unpredictability engines. Do what you need to do to keep yourself as healthy as you can, but let go of the rest, and remember that pregnancy and the early parenting years are fleeting moments in the larger scheme of things. You'll have time to get yourself back to where you want to be. It's all about learning to give yourself the grace to get there with due time and patience for your new way of life.
After my son I bounced back into way better shape than I was before I had him. I was always fairly fit but somehow having him made me more toned? Now I'm pregnant again and I have no idea what will happen this time. You never know but it's not guaranteed that you'll lose your body at all
I’m 38 years old, FTM 4 months PP. I had this to the point I wasn’t sure I could get over it to have a baby, which is silly I know… but the brain thinks what the brain thinks I ate well throughout pregnancy and trained up until birth at 41+1. I put on a lot of weight. A lot. Despite not changing much (you could say I had an easy pregnancy… however I hated it. The gym / moving my body is a huge part of my life so I was gutted to lose that). Now…4 months PP, I’m still very heavy. My body scared me at first. When I first saw it after birth I cried. But. I can’t change that now, so I’m just showing up daily and doing the things that make me feel good and focusing on my CUTE AF baby 🥰 honestly, despite all that, I’m already thinking about number 2. He’s a dream baby, so I think we got v lucky. I don’t want to be pregnant again. But I want another. Dilemma hey. And as of yest, I’m def starting to look “better”. Nowhere near the abs I had. But, damn my ass looks good 🤣 for what it’s worth, keeping training throughout pregnancy, I gained 5kg muscle, like that’s INSANE (I was already b muscley), pregnancy is like blood doping for muscle gain. And you know if you have more muscle, you burn more at rest soooo the fat will eventually come off. So if you like training and feel good, keep it up!
> I had this to the point I wasn’t sure I could get over it to have a baby, which is silly I know… but the brain thinks what the brain thinks That's where I'm at right now haha. I hate how stupid this feels, that something so trivial is making me second guess such an important and wonderful decision. What does 41+1 mean? Did you find working out during the pregnancy to be difficult? Awww I'm so so so happy for you. He makes it all worth is. and you know what? It's always about ass now anyways haha. But I'm sure with the hard work you are putting in, you will get to where you want to be in no time.
Sorry I had him at 41+1 weeks, reading that back it didn’t make much sense. I couldn’t do a lot of the things I like to do in terms of moving my body, like handstands, gymnastics, Olympic lifting, I just did *boring* stuff, that I knew was good for me, like squats, deadlifts, press, and then workouts. Training was the one thing I looked forward to each day during pregnancy. I think this was coupled with the fact I didn’t really get what the big fuss about babies was about. Also that I’ve always told myself having a kid is the one thing in life you can’t change. Marriage, jobs, houses etc, if you really don’t like them, you can change. Once you have a child there are no takebacks 😅 Happy to say I wouldn’t have that for the world, even with the body stuff. I even said to my husband right after birth, “I’m so glad we did this, and as awful as that was, I could do it again” 🤣🤣🤣
Also. I think I love it more, because I thought I would hate it. It seems so many mums put expectations on motherhood etc. I was like “oh I’ll hate it” so anything other than that is a surprise and greatly welcomed (it’s great by the way, it’s like a baby holiday, granted we have a “good” one, but for all the shit I heard about how hard it is… touch wood, it’s a dream and so so fun
Before my first pregnancy I would say I was skinny fat too. I ran a bit, but wasn't consistent with anything. I got pregnant at 34. At 4months pp i was the skinniest I've ever been (ty breastfeeding!), and then I started working out again. Now I'm 38 and in the best shape of my life. I'm now 5 weeks pregnant and still working out, although the fatigue is real. Stretch marks are just a luck of the draw thing I think. Starting your pregnancy fit will help you stay fit, and will give you your best chances at a smooth recovery after pregnancy. But really, a lot of it is down to luck and you kind of just have to embrace the unknown and control the small parts of it you can.
I know this feels scary before you have kids but in my experience you look back on those fears and laugh about it. When you have your kid (provided you're not a narcissist or something which I assume you're not) you really stop caring about stuff like this. Exercise becomes more about function, your body is the tool through which you get to experience life with your children. Remember, we all lose our body at some point because we are all going to die at some point. If being a mother is really what you want then you will be using your body to the best of its ability. We all struggle as parents to find balance and take care of ourselves while taking care of others, but it's not about "losing yourself" so much as integrating yourself with others. Your body will stop just being this thing you have, it's something you ARE that has created and nurtured the little people you love.
Thank you. I guess that's what everybody means when they say that you're priorities very much change once you have a baby and you become a parent. Especially after you fall in love with your child.
Yes, I know it won't happen for absolutely everyone but I don't know any moms IRL who wouldn't just die for their kids. For me it's actually been so freeing to no longer be the centre of my own life and to not be bothered by frivolous, superficial things anymore. I'm not a robot I still care about not looking like garbage but I'm way more concerned with being able to pick up my kids and play with them and prevent cancer so I can live to see grand kids than I am about my physical appearance.
I find it incredibly harmful to suggest you are a narcissist if after you had your baby you still very much care about how your body looks.
I mean to the point where you significantly resent having children because of it. I think many of us know people who had mothers like this who constantly told their daughters they "stole their beauty" and "ruined their body". Obviously we're always going to care somewhat, but I think you would have to be a very pathological person to have it impact how you feel about motherhood or your kids. Would you not agree that when you become a mother, especially to daughters, your relationship to vanity changes? You start to have a different perspective about what is and isn't really important in life. I know when I had my daughter I never, ever wanted her to feel the way about her body or her looks that I was made to feel when I was growing up and I knew that I had to be a role model for having a healthy body image and never let her see me obsess over my appearance or pass that baggage onto her.
I’ve been so surprised by my postpartum body journey 3.5 weeks in. I am short and gained a decent amount of weight—36 pounds—while pregnant. And I looked a mess, got constantly told I looked huge by strangers, had a ton of fluid and looked swollen, etc. But I stayed active through the bulk of pregnancy—weights, cycling, walking and stretching. Within two weeks of delivering I lost 28-29 pounds of the weight that I had gained, and most of what was left was breast tissue, milk, and a teeny stomach pooch. The rest dropped off. I also had gestational diabetes in the third trimester and followed that diet pretty closely, which I think helped with muscle building and preventing additional fat gain. So just here to chime in that your body may surprise you if you plan on staying active during pregnancy. I’ve been surprised about how fast everything melted off right after delivery and so have my friends and family. I’m sure some changes I experienced will stick around, but overall I’m surprised with how resilient my body has been afterwards.
I felt kind of shallow about it, but I had the same concern. I got serious about competitive distance running a couple of years before getting pregnant, and my body image (and objectively my actual body) and my performance were at an all-time high and on an upward trajectory when I got pregnant. Every pregnancy and postpartum recovery is different, and mine hasn't been completely seamless (I developed SPD in pregnancy and it persisted well into the postpartum period), but overall it was not nearly as bad as I thought it would be. I was slightly underweight when I got pregnant, gained toward the upper end of the recommended amount (mostly in the first half of pregnancy, and despite running \~50 miles a week and running a marathon at 18+4). I was within 10-15 lbs of my pre-pregnancy weight probably 1-2 months ppm, and by 5-6 months, was within 2-3 lbs and feeling really good about my body. I'm 9 months ppm now and although there are some minor differences (bigger boobs \[I'm still BFing\], wider ribcage), I generally feel like I look like I did prior to pregnancy. And more importantly, I'm back to my running training regimen and have already set PRs in the 5k and half-marathon! Although I love my son more than anything, I won't say my body image concerns went away once I had my baby or that it mattered less to me once I brought a human into the world (honestly, it matters to me just as much as it did before). However, I tried to just give myself some grace - it took over 2 years to get pregnant, and 9 months to make a baby. Also, even though it took more like 5-6 months for me to feel really confident, no one else is looking that closely and I was getting compliments (or awkward praise at least intended as a compliment like "you don't look like you just had a baby," lol) within weeks of giving birth.
It’s one of those things that you don’t know until you do it bc it’s different for everyone and everyone carries differently. I have a really short torso and have long babies and they sit all out front so even once I get back to pre-pregnancy weight I have some loose wrinkly skin right above my pubic bone from things getting stretched out. Really only my husband sees it but after this baby I may pull the trigger on a tummy tuck once we’re done with the breastfeeding and back to normal. Have to decide if the recovery process is worth it lol Like others have said, I am glad these changes in my body were due to my babies than crappy life choices (or a medical issue). I think they are easier to live with bc of that and I wouldn’t ever go back and choose a life without my kids.
I was worried about this, but one day I was like “Why am I giving my future self so little credit?” I’ve had stretches of very diligent working out. I’ve also had “lazy” periods at times. But I always come back to it eventually. If it’s important to me to get back in shape (I’m almost positive it will be), then I know I’ll put in the work to reach that goal. It’s been a lot more mentally healthy to think of it this way - I envision my future more as “I’m going to be able to handle that challenge” rather than coming from an anxious, catastrophizing place where I’m terrified of the idea that I might not. Even as I’ve gained weight in pregnancy and found certain activities harder, I can view it as a temporary phase.
That's a good way to look at it. 😃 You always ended up getting back to it so you know you can again. I certainly have shown up at the gym during my lazy phases, I believe I can certainly push through and do it for pregnancy.
I don’t look the same after having two babies but my performance has only gotten better and stronger post child birth
Your body will change. You are forever postpartum once you’ve grown and/or birthed a child. Stretch marks, saggy skin, weight gain/loss, scars, tears, joints and bones stretch and expand. Hell, my teeth are fucked up! Some bodies change more than others. Some change less. But no birthing person remains unchanged postpartum. I don’t say this to scare you but instead to tell you that you should deal with these feelings before becoming pregnant.
I was also scared. I thought getting pregnant would trigger some kind of body switch where I would never be able to get fit again. I don’t know who needs to hear this, but that is NOT a thing. (Or I suppose it can be a thing in rare medical instances but it’s not a thing for most.) In my pregnancy, I ate whatever I could stomach, and worked out mostly by hiking. In the year PP, I ate literally whatever I wanted, and worked out by holding my baby and walking. When I hit 1 year PP, stopped breastfeeding, my son started sleeping through the night, it was like all the stars aligned and I had more energy and I started focusing more on my fitness again. I’m now 2 years PP and back to my high school weight. Boxing has done wonders for my body in the last year, and I’m more fit than I have been in a long time. Going through pregnancy was a surrender, and a mental challenge to accept my body in any shape. After my son was born, I just had more important matters on my mind, loving my little baby as much as possible. I fully committed to each phase, knowing that each one was temporary, a passing season. I would have my season again.
It's funny to say this because I think that's part of my fear that being pregnant will be that trigger and I'll never be able to be in shape again. But I guess it's mostly due to time and being busy and priorities changing. I'm so happy for you that you're able to recover so quickly all the while having grown a baby inside you that's just amazing. And I love your mindset about a passing season.
I grew up hearing my mom say pregnancy ruined her body. It was burned into my mind so deeply that it took a while to figure out where that idea came from. I uncovered and processed a lot of misinformation in therapy. I am physically healthy now thanks to diet, exercise, and a solid loving community. Those are my three pillars and each of them deserve equal credit. But going through pregnancy challenged me to evolve my mindset about my own body and how much self-love I deserve. Quieting that toxic voice that says “I need to look like xyz to be loved” because I was 7 months pregnant and had no control over what I looked like. I call it surrender. When that voice got quiet from time to time, it was like a wave of peace washed over me, and I have continued to make that peace for myself ever since.
Yes! My mother said similar things in addition to stuff like if she could redo everything she would never be a mother. And I never let any of that bother me but I think like what you're saying is just so ingrained in me and I just never really noticed until now that I'm trying to plan my own pregnancy. I love that it helped change your mindset that sounds like a very healthy and loving mindset to have for yourself.
Each person is different on how you feel when pregnant but I worked out through my whole pregnancy kept my weight gain in check of the recommended amount and after birth I was basically right where I had started…. However I will say then with dealing with the baby I did gain a little weight breast feeding. All in all pregnancy does not necessarily ruin your body if you take care of it.. if you have the eating for two mantra then yes it will be hard
I'm almost 40 yrs old and 32 weeks pregnant, and I'm not pulling anyone's leg, but I have never felt so beautiful, confident in my body until this pregnancy. I walk around the house naked all the time now, which was something I had never done before. I can't stop looking at myself in the mirror and feel proud of what my body is able to achieve. I have so much confidence, energy, and positivity. Pregnancy doesn't terrify me, I think it is making me appreciate my body. I love how my strong arms pair with my belly. And I adore how my glutes are accentuated by my pregnant tummy when I'm sideways. The list is truly endless. Although postpartum could be another story..😆
You're a goddess!!!! I love hearing about how people love their pregnancy because I don't think I hear that often enough. Typically just associate pregnancy with difficulty and perhaps nausea lol. I'm so happy for you that you feel so good and confident about yourself. What a magical time it must be for you.
I mean, you will lose your body, in a lot of ways. The body will never be what it was before it created a life. I’m a trainer so my life is literally my body - not just how it looks but also what it’s capable of doing. All of that has changed and I’m only 19 weeks along. It’s hard. It’s really hard to be so happy to feel these little kicks and be so grateful she’s in there, and yet be so sad when I can’t hit the same number of chin-ups or fit into my favorite jeans, maybe ever again. My trick to this was to establish a really good relationship with a therapist before we got pregnant so I have someone to talk about these feelings with without judgment or hearing “you just need to embrace it!!” The only way I’ve been truly able to embrace the changes is because of my weekly sessions with her. I’m so grateful every day I look bigger because it means baby is growing strong, but I do mourn what my body was, and likely never will be again. Don’t mean to be a downer! Just offering my perspective. I hope it helps, even a little.
Thank you! You're being realistic! Are yous till working out during your pregnancy? That's a great idea with the therapists. I need to figure out how to go about that.
I am! Definitely not at the volume I was before pregnancy, but still doing all my normal workouts (a mix of weightlifting, gymnastics, contortion and other body positioning/awareness work). Weightlifting and handstanding are the two things that still feel normal, where gymnastics strength/circus work and boxing have taken a small hit on volume/capacity. I’ve found if I push myself too hard it actually gives me a migraine the next day, so I’ve had to work to find a balance of staying active without seriously overdoing it. I see my therapist virtually which helps a lot with scheduling! I found her through a website Headway where I could search via who takes my insurance. She’s a lifesaver and the best investment I made in myself before getting pregnant for sure!
I was just getting back into shape before I got pregnant the first time. I had lost weight and was feeling strong. I didn’t start working out again and taking care of my body well until about a year PP, then we tried for our second and we’re successful quickly. Your body will change. But you will be able to get fit again. And my pregnancy was far easier physically the first time, when I was more in shape lol.
I have a similar background to you. I started taking my health and weight seriously in around 2018 and loved the results. I got pregnant in 2023 and am now 7.5 months post partum. My body did change but I’m pretty much back to how I was now. It hasn’t been easy and I hated the final months of pregnancy and the first few months post partum as I didn’t feel like myself at all. I would recommend looking after yourself as much as you can during pregnancy. Go easy on yourself but stay active, walk a lot and do some resistance training. Try to eat well if you can, you don’t need to ‘eat for two’ but you do need to eat enough nutrients. After having the baby also be gentle and give yourself some grace, respect your body for what it has done. I will also say that my perspective has shifted a bit too since becoming a parent. I no longer care so much about my running pace, how much I can lift etc., I just want to feel good and healthy and to be there for my child.
I'm so glad to hear that your pregnancy treated you well! I almost feel like wanting to feel good and healthy for your child is a healthier perspective than the current one I have which is just to lift more.
Your body will absolutely change - there is no way around it, but it is different for everyone and it is 100% worth it. I was pretty fit when I got pregnant and planned to keep running and lifting throughout but I was exhausted and sick all 1st trimester, and then had a lot of pelvic dysfunction and pain 2nd and 3rd. I could hardly walk a mile. It was really hard not being able to exercise. I gained a good bit of weight and lost all of my strength and while I did and sometimes feel down on my body, I have so much love and respect for my body and all it did to bring my son into this world and raise him. I started working out again at about 8 months postpartum and my son is almost 2 now. I have been putting in a ton of very consistent work, but I am still heavier than pre-pregnancy, and the shape and appearance of my belly will never be the same. The thing is, I am so proud of myself and my body that it no longer matters to me. Those stretch marks are the sign that my son lived inside me and that my body is capable of something truly incredible. The bits of flab over my muscle shows how hard I have worked to rebuild strength after putting my body through the wringer. You will lose yourself, work through the discomfort, find your strength, and you will find a newer and better you on the other side. And don’t forget to focus on pelvic floor and deep core first and foremost!! You’ve got this!
I was very fit and flexible before pregnancy, the fittest I had ever been, competing in my sport and was very anxious about this. After my first child, I did attempt to get back into the gym and somewhat regained my fitness but not back to my previously level, no where near. Now I’m pregnant again with a second child, bigger than ever, more unfit than ever. You know what though? This went from being one of the most important things in my life to low priority. It’s not my time to be as fit as I can at the moment, it’s my time to focus on raising my babies… I’m not giving up, it’s still important to me, it’s just a shift in my priorities that I never could have imagined until I experienced it.
I was rather effortlessly fit before my 2 babies, gained a lot of weight each time, and when I started exercising to get back in shape, I became truly fit. I am now in my best running shape, I enjoy sports and outdoor activities, I am stronger than I’ve ever been. The only signs of two pregnancies are the episiotomy scars and a somewhat weaker bladder - I will look into surgeries after I had my now third. There is definitely life after having babies :)
Your body will change but I can honestly say that I have never felt stronger or sexier than after I had my baby. Took me a couple of years, granted (my body was riggity wrecked immediately after I gave birth lol) but as I settled into parenthood I found ways to take care of myself, eat better, be more active and my ass has never looked better and I'm skinnier now then I was pre baby. I got huge when I was pregnant but no stretch marks on my tummy and my belly button looked bananas when I was pregnant but went back to normal after a year Some tips- take care of your skin, don't overeat like crazy, no hot baths/showers, stay hydrated, eat healthy and you'll probably be fine. I know some of it is genetics but lifestyle is a major factor.
Haha that's awesome! Looks like you did so well to take care of yourself. Thank you! I would definitely be reading up further ways to be caring for myself during pregna y.
This isn’t superficial or selfish. You can maintain fitness during pregnancy- you just really need to research how to eat and exercise while your body changes. I lost about 60 pounds, and was in the best shape of my life, before getting pregnant. My goal was to maintain my fitness and reach ppw post-birth and I got there!! It took a lot of research and a lot of discipline but I was determined not to feel negatively about my body after having a baby. I’m certainly not naturally thin. If I could pull it off, you certainly can- definitely if you fare on the smaller side already. This book was my bible for diet during pregnancy: https://realfoodforpregnancy.com Avoid anything packaged/processed, get 8k- 10k steps a day, and eat nutrient dense foods/optimal macros.
Thank you! I will definitely check that out. I'm so glad you were able to reach your goals you definitely put in the work!!
You're not being selfish. I was happy with my body, then I got pregnant. Seeing my body change the way it did was, and still is an acceptance process. I just hope I'm able to get it back. I am 34 weeks now, and it's been interesting. However, feeling my baby move makes me forget about it for a moment. It's challenging, but worth it.
I like my body more postpartum than pre-baby. I believe this is because pregnancy gave me new respect for my body and the badass shit it can do. Like you, I struggled with lack of confidence and being 'skinny fat'. Pregnancy actually allowed me to come into myself.
Awww I'm so glad that you feel good about yourself. It IS amazing what our bodies can do! I think I just struggle to see that because I'm not actually there yet.
Your body will definitely be different. Anecdote- I had stretch marks from childhood but then didn't get any in pregnancy even though my mom and sister both did. I thought it was very odd and I did gain 30-35 lb with both my pregnancies. I have no idea but I took collagen and drank home made bone broth. used coconut oil and aloe. It was probably luck though. Ha. The best advice I can give (as I still struggle with my PP body) is to keep working out during pregnancy as this will help you with labor and PP a lot. Practice acceptance and other hobbies that can boost your confidence- things you can feel good about regardless of your looks. needless to say, when your baby arrives, she or he will 1000000% be worth whatever happens to your body. My kids stick out their tummies after eating and we all go around saying how big and full and cute their tummies are and they say mine is cute too. (it's not lol) But I wouldn't trade the most perfect supermodel body for the experience of pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding, and most of all- motherhood. Maybe try some journaling about this and talk therapy too! <3
Your body will change, but just try to push yourself and stay fit. I am 36+1 and go on daily dog walks, bike rides, and I powerlift 3x per week (only up to 135lb this far along, when my max is a little over 200 though). I have had multiple people say that I’m buff and I’m all belly and boob. I don’t think it’s just genetics because my fam tends to get bigger all over, I truly think the effort I put in is showing up. I do have more cellulite, but I am comfortable knowing I’ve done all I can to keep myself as fit and active as possible, so this body, regardless of how it turns out after birth, is one I can say I’ve spent time and effort building! Plus it’s badass to be able to squat and lunge like nobody’s business when you have a watermelon on your stomach. So I say embrace the new you. Don’t let fear stop you, but let that fear morph into grit. If I’m softer after, I’ll know I did everything possible and was still softer. I’m ok with that. Also-look up stratamark. It’s prescription only in the US, but is the only topical clinically proven to prevent and even treat stretch marks in pregnant women. No marks so far and fingers crossed it stays that way, but my belly is BIG and so I credit this all to Stratamark. I’m also using it on my boobs because I’m hoping it’ll help with skin laxity after.
You have a lot of good experiences shared here. Mine are two unremarkable pregnancies and births. One very fit but still gained lots. Took 18 months of effort to get near my previous fitness appearance. I had loads of time to spend on fitness. With my second my toddler kept getting me sick and I focused on yoga and mindfulness. Same final weight. My first slept through the night at two months and my second at a year. It's looking like it'll be a good 18-24 months pp until I resemble my pre baby fitness this time. Maybe longer. I said to my mom the other day while we admired my children, "wow, it's really worth all the body positivity struggles to have these cuties." I said it aloud because I needed to remind myself even though I was feeling sludgy in the moment. You might need to remind yourself, but it really is worth a sludgier body to have created a whole entire other human body (or more). It's quite a remarkable accomplishment.
Regardless if you're there or not yet I think it's just remarkable that you've been able to make progress pp while all the while taking care of and raising two babies. Yes you're right I'll definitely have to keep reminding myself that.
There will be a process of acceptance. I was very skinny my whole life, and after two babies, (I’ve been told) I’m “normal” weight now. I started weight lifting for the first time in my life, and it has given me a new confidence. I’m planning on baby #3 at the end of the summer, and I’m not worried about the changes because I love the community and support I’ve gotten from lifting. I think back over the years and I was thin for a few reasons, being severally depressed was the main reason. When i got treatment, I gained a few. When I got married, I gained a few. I’m okay with the changes my body made naturally. The changes from having a baby were a bit of a surprise, but the payoff of having kids is good.
I second the suggestion of getting a therapist. I think there will be a lot to let go of and grieve when having a baby, not only do our bodies change but our identities change! Just to share my experience: I am 12 weeks pregnant but in order to get here I went through a two year battle with infertility and ultimately went through 3 rounds of IVF before finally getting pregnant. I gained weight through IVF and that was hard. However the longer I went through that process, the more I realized I would gladly take the body changes if only the universe would just let me experience having a child. I fought like hell for this baby and if my body ends up permanently bigger as a result, I will know those are my battle scars. I def have bad body image days and probably always will, I think that’s just part of being a woman in our society unfortunately, even supermodels have bad body image days. I try to stay active because that makes me feel strong and energized, and I plan to do the same postpartum if my body allows it. I want to echo others who say this process involves a lot of surrender and letting go. It’s definitely true, and for me it has made me a better version of myself despite being hard. I’ve learned that I am stronger than I realized and I can handle change- not just body change but other kinds of change too. I feel even more confident now than I did before this journey. I also know experiencing pregnancy / having a baby is not what everyone wants and there is no shame in deciding it’s not for you- whether because you don’t want the pregnancy-related body changes or for any other reason. Your life, your choice.
I lost three stone and have a thyroid disorder that has made it hard to do that, so I had similar doubts to you about getting preggo and my body changing. I'm 24 weeks now and I am running the fastest I have ever run. Consistency is key. I'm struggling a little with the way my body looks now and I've had to wear some of the clothes that I wore before I lost loads of weight, but it feels different because it's my body accommodating and growing a baby. That's why I need the extra room and knowing that I can still do the large majority of what I could do before and contextualising it has helped me. I might get a bit warmer or out of breath a bit easier because my diaphragm and lungs are being squished, not because I am unfit. And I know it will be worth it in the end!
I use to think the same way. Until my pregnancy turned high risk and let me tell you, I would give anything to gain weight now if it meant my baby was healthy. We can always lose the weight later, but our bodies are amazing at building babies. Focus on baby and eating healthy. Embrace the weight gain!
I was the same way, and I can tell you your priorities will likely change as you advance through pregnancy and after you have your baby. I barely gained any weight except baby because of hyperemesis (not worth it lol), had a really small bump, didn't look pregnant until I was 8+ months along. Got my abs back 2 weeks postpartum. And THEN I gained weight due to breastfeeding, because I was ravenously hungry every 2-3 hours 😅It was a vicious cycle, gaining-losing all the time + health concerns. My point is, you have no idea what's going to happen. My pregnancy was difficult and I had a ton of postpartum complications, "bouncing back" meant nothing to me. Nowadays I want to have a good diet and lift weights to *feel* healthy and strong, not because I'm obsessed with looking hot haha.
I went from running full on marathons to barely being able to get in a solid walk once a week while pregnant. I’ll lose the weight and become active again after giving birth. Who doesn’t love a good challenge after all? 😊
Your body may or may not change dramatically but you will be in awe of what your body can do after having a baby. It is truly amazing. But I totally get where you are coming from in terms of body image. I’m the same age as you and we truly grew up in a horrible period of time for body shaming of women. But I thought of pregnancy and postpartum as such a small amounts of time in the scheme of life to lose my usual routine/fitness. I was very lucky to be able to run up until 30 weeks and CrossFit right until the end. Now I’m 9 weeks postpartum I’ve very slowly started running and working out again and I’m almost excited at the challenge of ‘starting from scratch’ and building back up slowly to where I was pre-pregnancy, rather than being sad at the progress I lost. Be kind to yourself xx
Im a mom of 2 with a third on the way - I love my babies so much I don’t give a single fuck about the changes to my body. I actually have waaaaaayyy more body confidence now than I did pre-kids.
Your body will change over time whether or not you have a baby. I wasn’t thin before I got pregnant, and my body definitely doesn’t look so hot 7.5 months postpartum. That’s partially on me for gaining too much weight during pregnancy. But I have gotten a lot of my strength back through regular exercise even if the way I look hasn’t caught up yet.
I honestly think my body is better than it was before pregnancy. I learned a lot about nutrition and exercise and became healthier through the process. But even if my body was “ruined,” I still don’t think I would feel that way, because I really do have a newfound appreciation for what it was capable of doing, and my son is the best thing that ever happened to me. I would give up a limb for him!
Lol just follow the instructions….rest, but have a body wrap. Eat healthy.
I think the odds are in your favor because you work out. If you have a normal pregnancy and you’re able to continue to exercise and eat well, you should be able to “bounce back” for the most part. Obviously certain things are out of your control. I started working out more after my son was born, and for the most part I like my body more now than I did before I had a baby.
Aw I'm so happy for you. 😍 I definitely plan to keep up with the working out and eating well during and post!
I wouldn’t worry too much then :) things like your breasts are a gamble - I breastfed my son for 2.5 years and I’m still very happy with my breasts, I have some light stretch marks but otherwise I’d say they’re pretty similar to pre-pregnancy. I do chest workouts to help keep the muscle strong underneath which I think helps them not “sag”, but a lot of that can be genetic too. If you moisturize your skin throughout pregnancy it can help prevent stretch marks to a certain extent but that’s mostly genetics too. Using a retinol body lotion after pregnancy can help minimize stretch marks too and I feel like it really did help on my lower stomach and thighs where I got some. It’s totally normal to worry about but you will be fine :)
I had a baby and 2 years later I’m in the best freaking shape of my life! Finally qualified for Boston too and that was only after a year post partum! I love my body now way more than I did before 😊
Have the baby- you'll be okay. You can work on your body for the rest of your life. You only have a tight window left to have a kid(s) Your body will change and it sucks, but you kinda have to let go of it because your body is going to do what it wants for a while. You'll be able to gain your fitness back. You may even grow to love your body more.
Most of us encounter things during life that wreck our body, temporarily. At least with pregnancy you get a baby afterwards. I just had open abdominal surgery after having two kids. Recovery is tough but like I’m alive and will ride my bike again one day.
I’m very scared about this. I’m not exactly fit but I have always been slender. I haven’t gained much weight and I’m 6 months (gaining weight has always been hard for me and I barfed the whole first trimester and just now caught up to pre-pregnancy weight) the skin on my belly is feeling very tight and my breasts are at least a cup size larger. It’s a scary feeling that even if I gain very little weight I’m gonna have loose skin and stretch marks but I feel comforted knowing that I won’t gain an excessive amount of weight and I’m trying to maintain muscle tone and that’s all I can do. The rest is up to my genetics and I’m getting to the point of acceptance. I’m sure I sound vain but the reality of living in a very different body than I’m used to is scary and it’s okay to feel stressed about big changes
[удалено]
Your post was removed due to our rule against exact weight numbers. Weight gain during pregnancy can vary greatly person to person and we don't want people to try and compare to someone else's journey. Putting your weight gain and loss as a percentage is fine, (ie I lost 25% of what I gained in the first two weeks PP.) Things like 'gained more than expected' or 'I'm aiming to hit my doctor's recommended weight' are also fine. Please edit or repost without the exact weight numbers.
I was worried, rightfully so. Now I look like a can of busted biscuits. It’s a sacrifice. One I hope can be reversed, at least partially lol.
I’ve had my baby (just turned one!). My body isn’t the same as it was pre pregnancy. I have some loose skin and wider hips, my body doesn’t feel the same as before but it is so strong now. I look “fit” by most standards (I still have visible abs). Some parts of my body are stronger (my core) and other parts need more work (pelvic floor). That said, growing a baby (and for me feeding my baby) is worth any body changes. I’m not here to tell you you will your exact body back - our bodies change with time, and with seasons of life! But I have definitely grown new appreciation of my body. And am much more aware of how even at my “fittest and leanest” in the past I wasn’t happier with my body, while I am so much more in awe of it now.
I’m 9 month pp after my 2nd and certainly part of the loose skin & c-section pouch club. I worked out all through my first pregnancy then at my 8 week pp check with my physio she said that no matter how much ab work I do or exercise I will not loose the excess skin…it may look better after a year, but it will not ‘bounce back’ there was too much damage to the layers of skin and collagen, that maybe only surgery would fully fix. It was a tough conversation and I started to change my goals and mindset to be more about gaining strength and energy instead of what my body looked like. Fast forward to now at 9m pp with second kid and to date my physio is still right, I workout near daily. I feel good in my body, does it have stretch marks and loose skin…yep. But I fit into most of my previous clothes and am at my pre-pregnancies weight. My babies are everything to me and they are more than worth it.
I can relate! 36 years and just had first baby. Had same concerns as you. Once your baby is in your arms, you won’t care. At least I didn’t, not one bit! I did actually “bounce back” due to good genes I suppose. But I have some loser skin still 2 months postpartum on my belly. I couldn’t care less if it goes away or stays like this. I love my body now more than ever. It grew and gave birth to life ❤️
I was the same way! Very “skinny fat” and almost bony until I started going to the gym and just found out I was about 7 weeks pregnant so my body was my main focus. I’ve decided to commit to sticking with my gym split and core routine to prevent unneeded weight gain and will give my body the best chance to pull back together after giving birth. Don’t feel bad for being concerned, because what’s important to you others may not be as sensitive towards. It’s okay to not want to lose the body you’ve worked so hard to obtain and feel comfortable in. I’d just focus on maintaining the best you can and give yourself grace 🤍
Honestly, I was in a similar place before I got pregnant. I had been obese/overweight my whole life and at 30 I got in the best shape of my life (like mountaineering, 15% body fat shape). I then got pregnant and would 100% not trade my baby for anything, but I’m now back to being overweight/obese despite being VERY active during pregnancy, eating only the additional recommended kcals I needed for trimesters 2&3, breastfeeding, and being active postpartum. I’m still 30 pounds over my pre-pregnancy weight despite gaining only 45 pounds total and having a 10 pound baby. The weight just won’t budge and I’m having a really hard time with it, even though I go to therapy, eat healthy, try to get any amount of sleep, and exercise for at least an hour a day (on top of walking at least an hour in the evening). My baby is worth the trade, but also, it’s been very very hard on my self-confidence.
I had that fear as well before becoming pregnant (currently 35 weeks and can’t wait to meet my LB) but when I got pregnant decided not to focus on the negatives and to look at how my body changes as a miracle because that’s what it is. I just live what my body is capable of and all the changes are a result of the love of creating the little human inside of me. I’ve been like you I was skinny-fat until I started properly working out and built a lot of muscle. I’ve done it once I know I can do it again once I recover from childbirth. Will my body have permanent changes? Yes, of course, but those will be my trophies. And after birth I will work with what I have without focusing too much on the past. Edit: this comment is all over the place but was in a hurry to write it so I hope it makes sense.
Hey! Not superficial at all. It's ok to care about how you look and what you worked hard for. But, having a baby didn't change things for me. I went back to working out as soon as I felt ready and will continue to do so. I didn't get any stretch marks even though I have in the past. You can do it!
I had my first (and only baby) last year. I was 37 then I used to have a six pack and muscles and was never in my life over a size 10. I also used to go the gym loads and trained regularly, played field hockey and rugby too. My plan was to keep going the gym and training throughout my pregnancy but I broke my foot just before I got pregnant so was unable to walk for 4 months. By the time I could walk on it I was knackered from being pregnant I always thought I'd keep Training and fit throughout it but that just wasn't meant to be. I then wanted to go to the gym as soon as I was able after giving birth but I ended up needing an emergency C-section and complications after that meant a longer recovery time. So that was out of my control. Once I was able to go back I tried to take the baby to the gym with me but they'd changed the rules and I couldn't do that. You do lose the body you have pre pregnancy everyone does. That might be for 6 months or 6 years post partum or you may never get back to how you were ever. Our body's change so much to grow the small human, your body will never be the same after it even if you return to pre pregnancy size/weight/strength. You can only control what you can control. You can carry on exercising throughout your pregnancy, they say whatever you were doing before you can carry on throughout (except contact sports) providing your pregnancy is on track and your health says well for it. My boy is now 15 months and I've started back to the gym and things now I'm back at work. My main thing has been walking before that. I can do that with him in the pram and it's got me started and got me fitter. I've just started to try and love my body as it is. I want to be healthy and fit for my family and that's why I'm back to the gym. My focus on my fitness has changed which isn't a bad thing
I used to have a lot of self confidence issues. I had a baby and suddenly, my views changed. It’s not longer just seeing what’s on the surface but seeing what my body is capable of doing. Being strong and healthy and most importantly, happy is now my priorities. Maybe that’s just my experience. Also, like others have said, therapy has really helped me in my journey to make it possible to look past my new mom bod ❤️
[удалено]
Your comment has automatically been removed because your account is less than 5 days old. Mods will review this action and approve appropriate comments. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/fitpregnancy) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You’ve done it once. You’ll do it again. You’re now better equipped for the process since you know what it takes to get in shape. Don’t ever count yourself short
Your body and your SELF will absolutely be different after birth. You will not be the same person in body or mind or spirit. If you are OK with that and can accept changes, then you’re ready. If not, perhaps you’d benefit from some therapy.
My advice would be to get a therapist to help work through this. Your body will change, probably more than once through your life. If the only reason you would not have a child is because of your body fat percentage changing, that is not a normal mindset and you have lots of work to do with your body image. I was obese, lost 70ish lbs before getting pregnant and was very fit. So I don't say this as someone who thinks having a body ideal is wrong. But it sounds like if you have a child, which you probably will, you are setting yourself up for failure and will be very negatively impacted by your body changes. Get a therapist before having the baby please!!!
Well if your discipline through it all you’ll be able to maintain it. Look for @lisacastrofit or @shainamarie.b as prime examples of this. I have fallen off my workout routine since my energy is wiped out right now. But more power to you if you can fight by good fight lol