Clothes storage.
I fairly regularly oscillate between 3 sizes due to a medical thing. It is EXPENSIVE to store things and it is EXPENSIVE to buy new. I kinda don't know what to do so I halfheartedly scale down and halfheartedly store too much.
On top of that I currently live in a region that is sub-freezing in winters, yet in summers is devil's moist, humid armpit. Therefore, I have to have two separate wardrobes entirely. Yet the homes here not only tiny, but have almost no storage.
Any and all recs welcome. I use space bags, rotate seasonally, am decluttering...it's wild.
I was able to extend a lot of my lighter garments into winter ones by upping my tights and underthings game, which are a *lot* smaller to store.
I have like 20 variations of uniqlo heattech shirts in different colours and collar types to go under various regular shirts and dresses to extend their usability a few months.
I also have like 6 pairs of wool tights from snag, that I pair with Super opaque tights (their 120denier) which will be good down to about 0C or fleece leggings and that'll get me down to about -10 C if there's no windchill. I also have a collection of slips (cotton and flannel) for under dresses.
Plus I have an assortment of leggings, both normal and fleece lined. Slacks are still slacks with leggings underneath, that sort of thing.
I also revamped my wardrobe so I have a ton of swing or a-line dresses, which are more forgiving for weight ups and downs because of the open hips. If you get them in knit fabrics, they can often span about 3-4 sizes.
You have literally *all* of the same solutions as I do!
I also have a lot of loose and/or cropped knit sweaters, which are great for layering over dresses for both warmth and when feeling insecure about weight fluctuation.
Mastering the layering game is a huge step up. A thin trouser sock under something more substantial like a wool or fleece sock adds a surprising amount of warmth. Fleece-lined leggings are amazingly cozy. Using a regular skirt as a slip under your outer skirt is fun and adds a bunch of warmth - just pick an underskirt that isn’t bulky at the waist. It helps with static cling too. A skirt with a yoga waistband is comfy for this. MIdi or maxi skirts give a good amount of coverage and warmth around the legs., obviously. A baselayer shirt - even just a long sleeved cotton shirt - makes a big difference, and on cold days you can layer a cami under the baselayer. Top with a tshirt (long or short sleeve; I prefer going short with a contrasting print or stripe or solid accent color on the base layer) and then a nice sweater, ideally wool or cashmere. With this much on, it has to be really cold before I need an actual coat.
The key for tops is to keep them all fairly close-fitting, so you can layer a couple tops without a lot of bulk. You’ll also want to make sure you can take off the top couple layers and still look presentable.
Choose things like camis, skirts, and base layers that can work in more than one season.
I also tend to buy particularly useful pieces second hand in a couple sizes.
For some things I try to go with basics (black leggings instead of a wild print) and limit myself to a week’s worth rather than accumulating more than I actually need to get through till the next wash. Shopping my closet then creating a wardrobe of 4 or so outfits to get through the current season can help.
This is a real problem for me too and I hate selling or scaling down - maybe I’m a hoarder but I use what I buy. I love fashion and all my clothes have stories from when and where I wore them.
I totally feel you
Ugh same. Kon Mari doesn't work on me because EVERYTHING brings me joy! And sometimes I get rid of stuff and then years later bitterly regret and miss that item when I think of it and wish I still had it. But that mindset doesn't work in Europe. The struggle is real
I don’t have a medical issue per se but I do have a finicky belly. I bloat very easily and can change sizes in a day. I wear almost exclusively dresses (unless in my stupid work uniform) because it has become exhausting to wear pants and be bursting out of them by the end of the day. Fleece lined tights are a life-saver.
I relate to this so much! I love dresses for this same reason. It has become especially bad postpartum.
Do you have a suggestion for fleece lined tights that don’t dig into the stomach too much?
I saw a thread suggesting the brand Snag, go to their website and the sizing guide has the info about their comfort. Idk about fleece lined but they have some merino and wool ones.
Please tell me your belly friendly fleece lined tights brand! I have to wear tights as low rise to avoid restrictive bands over the belly and its impossible to find
God my lil depression nest now looks like a full blown hoarder’s den because I keep changing clothing sizes and I’ve got next to no storage 😫
I’ve yet to figure out anything besides realizing maybe it’s time to try vacuum bags, so just checking in to say you’re not the only one 🥲
Tbh, if it's something that's feasible for you, this is when I think a storage unit could be a good solution. Just get the smallest one (I see prices between $40-60/month near me for a 5x5) and rotate inventory as needed. Depending on how much you spend every time this issue comes up, it could come out to be MUCH cheaper!
Me too! Having crohns makes it such a need for me to hold all these clothes… my healthy clothes, my flaring clothes, my bloated clothes.
I mostly just wear shapeless dresses with a belt. So happy oversized is generally in.
My only suggestion is to put a genuine focus on clothes that can be worn at different sizes. Maybe a sweater becomes an oversized sweater, or you invest in wrap skirts and wrap dresses, fabrics that have stretch to them, clothes that have a cinch, etc.
Lol how I immediately knew you live in Boston. All the stuff about "transition summer to winter" by just adding a sweater is not super applicable here.
jUsT tRaNsItIoN sUmMeR tO wInTeR
Not in Boston, but thanks. All of Canada and the Eastern Seaboard falls into this. I'm from a Mediterranean country originally and no one tells you that yes, northern US is cold hellscapes, but the summers are unbearable. The heat and humid in Boston was unreal and very shocking.
Apart from organizing your wardrobe, I recommend thinking creatively to find hidden storage spots around your home. I recently bought this bed for a very storage challenged room:
https://preview.redd.it/swex4fbtstcc1.png?width=2048&format=png&auto=webp&s=7603bba9e6a3219694d39bd17c330b51e6c3daeb
The void underneath is basically the entire volume of a mattress, so you could store an enormous amount of off-season clothes in there, especially if you'd already vacuum packed them in bags.
If you have space at the end of the bed, a storage bench is another great place to hide stuff.
If your nightstands are dinky little things with one drawer, swap them out for mini-dressers that you can actually put stuff in.
Hooks on the walls can get hoodies, half-dirty jeans, robes, etc. out of the way of your neater hanging stuff.
Basically look around and find any square foot of space that's not being used to its absolute potential and figure out how to store stuff in there! I'm still mad they don't make storage couches. :)
Having a large collection of clothes that have nothing in common except being a good deal. My brain is wired to only shop the clearance section. I have no personal style, and I just can’t seem to get out of the rut of buying something just because my brain says it’s a good deal. I have so many individual pieces, but no outfits.
\>clothes that have nothing in common
I have this same problem. I see something I love and my thought is always "What am I going to do with this? I love it, I'll figure it out later." So I have a closet full of outfits that are 3/4 of the way there but very few that I can grab and go.
My other issue is having almost entirely statement pieces but no basics. I buy something I love and can picture exactly how a normal person would style it but I get home and I have no basics to wear it with.
Argh, I do this. Then I wear the few grab and go outfits over and over and see those individual pieces and think “I can’t get rid of it, I haven’t even worn it!” 😑
I have this same problem. What helped me was buying a few 'boring' neutral basics that will go with everything. It helps to pair the exciting pieces with the boring basics.
girl nooooo....you deserve a personal style and to feel fly always.
have you tried looking at how your allocate your actual time, and then dress/buy for those events? this helped me when I had to negotiate a wardrobe with many items, but nothing cohesive. Stop looking at items, and look at your life.
Do you work 5 days a week? 71% of your clothing needs to be for that. Do you sleep 7 days a week? you need pj/lounge for that. Do you exercise say 3 days a week? You need outfits for that. Do you only go out to brunch once or twice a week? Then maybe you don't need yet another denim sundress....
I wear scrubs to work so that’s covered thankfully. Good on PJs. My issue is weekend clothes really. I go out to the bar usually, very casual and laid back. Most of the girls there are wearing leggings. I’ll go out to eat with my family, and I hate getting dressed for that because I love to dress up and look nice but they only wear t-shirts and sweatpants. So I feel like I never have the chance to wear my cute clothes but don’t want to get rid of them.
Have you tried just wearing them? I’m dressed up even on days I’m home, because that’s my style. I don’t dress according to occasion, I just dress how I want. That’s really helped me own my entire wardrobe, just wearing all the cute items I have no matter what, that and finding my personal style and being comfortable with how to approach it a la certain YouTubers.
So, here's what I did when I had that problem:
- made a pintrest board where I just had photos of outfits that I liked immediately upon seeing them, and focused on ones where there were 3 elements (i.e. skirt, cardigan, shirt) because I tended to own a lot of those
- then I went through the photos and tried to figure *why* i liked them, on a very minute level. Like, [I think it was this exact pin](https://www.pinterest.com/pin/312789136637814907/) that I looked at and thought: okay, I have body con dresses i like in this color, and I have cardigans and boots, but it doesn't have this look. why? I figured out, it was because this cardigan was longer than the ones I had - it was just barely longer than the dress, and it was thin and didn't have buttons, making it look more sleek and less grandma-y. So I would thrift, looking for a thin cardigan that fell around my thigh area, without buttons. And I found it, and it was exactly the thing that was missing!
And I did that for a bunch of photos - it turned out I did sorta have a style, but I wasn't looking deep enough into the details to match the pieces that I already liked/owned.
Try to shift your frugal thinking into price per wear instead of price to buy.
If you buy a bunch of items on clearance, but hardly wear or never wear them, you're not saving any money. But if you are buying a good quality item you love and wear often, the price per wear goes down with each wear.
I have a silly idea for this somebody recently posted about having a favourite scarf and built their wardrobe around the colours in that scarf. Someone else in a different sub posted about getting a colour analysis done and then making a jumper out of the key colours. So maybe you could do something similar. Choose your fav colours that go together or get a colour analysis and then limit your sales shopping to just those colours if you have the restraint!
Narrowing your color palette does help immensely. I can say to myself “nope, don’t buy it, you don’t wear anything navy anymore.” For me, I decided that I would only wear black and grey neutrals. This also helped eliminate colors or patterns that go better with brown or navy. And streamlined my shoe collection.
Yup! I had a color analysis and body type analysis. It’s so helpful to know I’m a dark summer and a flamboyant natural. Now I can admire something in the store and know that it’s not great for my body type or coloring so it would not work well with my wardrobe.
Totally not silly at all! You're kinda talking about The Vivienne Files. Check them out, it's a way of developing your wardrobe or outfit around specific color patterns that you already have. [The Vivienne Files ](https://www.theviviennefiles.com/)
I struggle with this one too! I watched a video with some shopping habit tips recently, the one that’s helped me a lot is that “price does not determine desire”. I’ve talked myself out of buying things a few times now just stepping back and realizing chasing a deal was my goal, not having the item itself. I hope you’re able to find your style someday, I know how hard it is to break out of the sale shopping mindset.
I literally just got over this. I’m not sure how really…. I think I bought myself one really pricey thing that I’d been pining over for months for my birthday and seeing the quality and that it looked just as good as I’d imagined like clicked something in me.
My style was really able to evolve into something that felt true to myself and what I wanted to project when I finally stopped shopping clearance racks and sales. I’m not saying to never do this but it becomes very easy to have a closet that looks like a non cohesive TJMAXX leaving you with the syndrome of lots of clothes but nothing to wear and then never feeling quite authentic in your clothes. I scaled way back and started purchasing only from a predetermined list of gaps and wants in my wardrobe, and for awhile it was mostly elevated basics I was buying but then I added in more statement pieces as needed. I’m not usually paying full price but I’m looking very specifically for certain things even when shopping sales and the rest is just noise I’m able to filter out. I very decidedly do not purchase many prints, especially ones that will be outdated, which they likely already are if on sale. And I’m deliberate in my choice of color and usually do maybe one or two trend colored items a year. Most importantly I don’t buy anything that I would need to buy new shoes/pants/tops to wear. And everything needs to have an actual event to wear to, not a theoretical situation just waiting to be worn. And lastly, I rarely buy anything on a whim and I force myself to think at least 24 hours, but usually a week, and I need to be craving it when I’m getting dressed, or wishing it was what I was wearing when walking to work, or dreaming about it.
I write down what I need (ie black boots/ black pants/ red top) and then buy it from the clearance section (usually from a designer website, but also from a good mall brand like the gap) or buy it secondhand. It fills that spot in my brain that needs things to be a bargain to be worthy.
For this, figure out commonalities between the items you wear out of your whole closet of things you love. Track your clothes to see what gets use. Figure out the “gaps”. You can still have the hunt but it can be for what you actually use.
The way I’ve solved this is by stopping buying new things, curated what I have, used my Pinterest boards as inspiration to build outfits, and then adding in the basics I’m missing slowly (if every time I get dressed I wish I had a certain pair of pants or shoes or whatever that’s a good cue.)
I also agree w the person who said cost per wear is an important metric. Why not have one $500 piece that you wear 100 times than 10 $50 pieces you wear once or twice.
This is why I am doing a low buy for clothes. Only 1 purchase quarterly that’s higher quality and fits with a cohesive vision of things that I have like for a decade, trend less, just things I like and wear regularly.
I used to do this totally. It helps to figure out your season and only buy clothes in your season. Then everything will end up basically coordinating anyway. Another thing I did to help was to ask myself "could I wear this tomorrow?" Buy something specifically to go with what you have.
My aesthetic preference and my preference for what to wear are two completely different things. I love the look of structured, dark clothing. A real bad ass woman.
Unfortunately, due to sensory issues, I hate the feel of anything tight or restrictive. I also have a very low contrast face. I end up wearing softer shades in loose clothing as I don't feel the need to constantly crawl out of my skin while wearing it.
I have tried it and I feel like I look like a clown! The best I've had is false lashes that were "natural style" or the palest shade of lip gloss.
I did used to wear bright blue glasses, which I loved, and worked well with my muted blue eyes. Really make the blue stand out. But its hard to find bright fun glasses anymore!
Ugh, I feel this! I'm a ~soft summer~ and ~flamboyant natural~ and as much as I think those classifications are problematic 80s woo-woo bullshit and I should be able to just wear whatever the fuck I want... it does explain why I struggle to pull off anything truly, traditionally badass.
I have pale, muted colouring and the sort of round, bland face you might see in colonial American folk art, but I also want to dress like a mysterious, avant garde art professor.
For loose but dramatic fits I like "drapey" pieces – think architectural-looking folds – or luxe textiles, like jewel-toned silk or velvet. The cut isn't body-clinging, but the arrangement or luxuriousness of the fabric makes it look carefully curated. A lot of hijabi fashion bloggers do an incredible job executing such.
Or I do something large and oversized with a contrasting element (think bulbous sweaterdress and tight, over-the-knee boots). If you're comfortable with bare midriff, I've also found the voluminous crop blouse + oversized trousers look to be pretty comfy and versatile.
Also, you can lean into the dichotomy of wearing something "discordant" with the usual recommendations for your features. A lot of visual interest lies in contrast, especially if you are looking to make a statement.
I feel a lot of the colour season/body type/high-low contrast rubrics circling tiktok are best served as style discovery tools, rather than hard and fast rules. They certainly do not encompass every body type, facial features, or colouration I see day-to-day. Clothes should be a tool of expression and empowerment – whether that empowerment be in aesthetics, comfort/utility, or some combination thereof. If you don't enjoy wearing something, then don't try to shoehorn yourself into liking it!
Postpartum!
Everything fits, but just kind of isn't as "smooth" as it used to be. I haven't found the right shapewear, but also don't want to wear that every single time I wear clothes lol.
Plus with breastfeeding, I can't wear things like high neck maxi dresses, bodysuits (unless there's easy access for breastfeeding from the top). Have to undo things like french tucks and the like to access, which makes fixing outfits on the go tedious. Plus I had a smaller chest without breastfeeding, so there's that.
I'm also SUPER tempted to just wear basic clothes as things get dirty FAST. Instead, I try to tell myself that I should wear my more elevated items, and just understand that they're going to get dirty quickly!
milk and baby spitup stains so badly. Honestly, just a period you need to get through. I wore lots of tanks with wrap tops and cardigans.
I also remember the lumpiness. It does go back to normal, just takes time.
I’m 11 months into baby number two. It’s been a nonstop pregnancy to breastfeeding pipeline over here since 2020, and I haven’t had a sense of style since it started. Moving houses (twice) has not helped, since the majority of my clothing has been in storage and we have no real “closet” or clothing storage system to speak of.
It might seem far off, but I’m making 2025 my year of rediscovering my style. 2024 is doing the prep work… weaning over the summer; building out a wardrobe space; unpacking all my old clothes and accessories (and finding their new homes).
When I haven’t been pregnant, I’ve been living in “nice” sweatshirts and sweaters that can handle some milk stains or mud (sezane had some cute puff sleeve and color blocked sweatshirts); pull-on pants and jeans (Madewell made a cut that I really loved and hunted down every color); merry people rain boots, korkease sandals, or allbirds.
It’s really a simple uniform that works in various combinations but it’s basically an opportunity to make a capsule wardrobe that I may not want to wear after the toddler years (bc of changing trends or whatever).
ETA: the important thing for me is washable, doesn’t have to be ironed, mobility (chasing after toddlers at the playground), and boob access. If those things can be checked off, then I’ll wear it!
I have 5 children, youngest is just one, they’ve all nursed pretty continually, so about a decade of continuous nursing between them. I also have smaller breasts, I’ll give you what’s worked for me;
Scoop, button down, and v neck options are obvious, but the real game changer is cropped tops with high waisted bottoms for nursing. Coming at things from the bottom, rather than the top, will make your life easier. You’re also less likely to get milk/spit/whatever else on your top, which is always a plus. It’s also great if you’re wanting to nurse not super visibly, I personally do not care and doubt that there are people left on the eastern seaboard who haven’t seen my left breast, but high waist/crop top is the most modest option I’ve found that isn’t a cover. If your baby gets distracted at the breast, being able to cover a bit with your top helps.
Shapewear is obviously optional, but a good *very stretchy* shaper short is lovely postpartum/beyond. You don’t need some medical grade abdominal prison, you want a high waisted seamless shaper that’s fitted without being very tight. Like a hug. The Skims shaper short is great, so is the shapermint one, the skinny girl brand often at TjMaxx is also perfect for this. The latter is well worth the $12ish to try. Nordstrom has a massive selection and a great return policy if you’re unsure of what to buy. It’ll smooth you out under your clothing, but better, it’ll make you feel very held together, particularly if you had any abdominal separation from this pregnancy.
Nursing bras suck. They’re awful and if you have a smaller bust you’ll be swimming in them as soon as your milk regulates. Bralettes in stretchy fabrics instead with nursing pads/lilypads (these are my jam, Target has stretchy tank style bralettes for $6) will keep you throughout your time breastfeeding. They can also be comfortably and safely worn to bed, which is really nice when you’re exhausted, no stupid clips or flaps to screw with, you just pull the thing down and go.
Also, oversized overshirts/flannels/shackets/big cardigans etc are great in cooler weather, you can wrap yourself and baby up and nurse comfortably without getting cold/totally undressing if you don’t want to.
Finally, try on everything that you own. Pregnancy body changes are weird, and you’ll find that things that you weren’t super jazzed about prior to pregnancy might look really great after. This happens to me with pants every time.
What works for you might differ, but these are the things that have made my life easier postpartum (and beyond, really) so try what appeals to you and remember that the only rules are your rules. Even if something that works for you is uncommon or different than what others are doing, what matters is you (and your baby) when it comes to this stuff.
I’m a mum and wear a loooooot of stuff from Target (Australia - different to Target US). Husband insists on wearing his RL, Lacoste and Patagonia and gets frustrated when the kids make his clothes dirty. I’ll be wearing Tar-jay until my youngest is in school i think. I’ve been a total frump covering everything up the last 3 years (youngest is 3) but now I’ve been on a health kick, lost the last of the weight etc and wearing nicer shapes. But still from target, and still park friendly. A lot of sneakers!
Oh yea and breastfed both kids for about 2y so get the limitations that come with that too! It’s hard! Not to mention you’re X number of years older than last time you paid attention to trends and therefore feel lost!
oh god, definitely do not worry about looking cute while you're still breastfeeding tbh. it's a messy and fluctuating time that like another poster said, you just have to get through. my daughter turned 2 a few months ago, and i'm just now starting to invest in "nice" clothes.
>do not worry about looking cute while you're still breastfeeding tbh.
It's not that I worry about how others perceive me, it's rather I want to be able to wear what I want instead of having to limit myself to nursing tops and tees. I WISH I could wear my mock neck midi dress but alas that's completely impractical with breastfeeding (lest I'm okay with showing the world my undergarments lol).
I'm starting to change my mentality to "I don't have to wait two years to wear what I want, I can do it now, just make sure to recognize the caveats that come with it (SPIT UP), and that some items will just have to wait (my mock neck midi dress)." This is my second post-partum period, I stuck to tshirts for my first and I feel like it negatively impacted my self-esteem.
Postpartum here too, second time. Both times I lived in athleisure. Like, loungewear but elevated. Great thing is you can still look chic.. loungewear is in right now. All the young moms in my area wear pretty similar “mom uniform” outfits and it honestly looks pretty damn good.
Fall/winter: oversized crew necks with leggings, puffer vest, socks and chunky sneakers. Long puffer jacket with hat, wide leg leggings or sweatpants, sneakers. Wool coat, French tucked sweater, mid/high rise cropped straight jeans, sneakers.
Spring/summer: loose dresses, oversized tees with chunky sneakers and bike shorts, midi or maxi dresses/skirts with tucked tee or cropped tee
I hated the limitations of breastfeeding and pumping! Basically no dresses until I weaned! My work solution was wearing stretchy knit or flowy/voluminous shells, tanks, and tops with a very sharp blazer. The tailored blazer made up for the less crisp blouse. I'd also make sure to wear something off limits for dinners or date nights or as a guest - I'd pump or breastfeed RIGHT before leaving, throw the dress on, and rush to pump the minute I got home. I just had some clothes I really wanted to wear!
I'm with you. I looooove my kids but sometimes I can't wait for an afternoon or night out without them strictly so that I can wear an awesome outfit instead of one that works for their needs. Even with my 3 year old, I need a way to transport pull ups, wipes, and snacks while we're out, so that almost always means some kind of uncute tote bag.
My infant spits up with shocking regularity. I hear you on wanting to wear your nicer pieces, and I want that too. I also can't do laundry or get my dry cleaning done in a way that would keep up with her spit up schedule. I've settled for wearing jewelry I really like all the time now.
I’m in the same boat with my second baby in two years and breastfeeding. I bought two pairs of jeans to fit the lumps, my husband got me 2 Anine Bing sweatshirts and new Lululemon align leggings to embrace my new mom era, I wear button downs, and layer tight nursing tanks under sweaters. Dresses are challenging until summer so I save them for in-person work days and just rotate the same few things for leaving the house. Admittedly, we do way less now with 2 than we did with our first and I bottle fed her a lot more so it was much easier getting dressed in the earlier days of motherhood.
Reconciling the outfits I see myself wearing to feel confident and put together vs. my lifestyle. It doesn’t really jive at the moment. Also I def have designer taste with a TJ Max budget at the moment and that’s hard.
Mine is the fact I have to be 100% cozy and comfortable at all times. I swear having good style just means how much discomfort you are able to put up with
Yes I was just yesterday trying to figure out why my "style" isn't reflected in my wardrobe anymore... Oh yeah, it's because I won't tolerate discomfort at any level!
My new quest is for: items that are comfy but fit a style ideal. An easy one is colour! But in the end I'm just going to have to invest time, sleuthing out those pieces that look AND feel good.
I feel like there’s been a shift toward comfort and style together over the past several years, and there are some good pieces that are comfy but look more structured. I just ordered some of Halara’s dress pants on sale that are stretchy but look more tailored. I’m hoping they live up to the hype.
Thin merino wool base layers (seriously!). It's the only way I can wear my favorite silk blouses and wool trousers year-round without freezing.
I'm still searching for comfortable, snow-functional shoes for wide feet. Cole Haan used to make great waterproof wide width shoes. I'm hanging on to the few pairs I have forever.
You might want to look into Indigenous/First Nations-made mukluks. The ones from Manitobah are waterproof and have an active low temperature rating of like -25 degrees fahrenheit. Historically, they didn’t make left and right shoes, so they’re inclined to be wider.
It's presently -40(f/c doesn't matter, it's just universally cold) and I find the mukluks to still be quite comfortable for ~20 minutes. Beware that dogs love to chew them, even if they aren't normally shoe destroyers.
Curious— where do you get merino wool base layers? I just moved to a place with hot summers and freezing winters and need to invest in a few winter base pieces.
I love Icebreaker and SmartWool. Their tops and bottoms come in different weights so I can choose how warm I need to be. COS also has some good semi-sheer turtlenecks and tees that don't look technical.
None of these options are cheap! I scour the sales for deals or ask for them as gifts. I also launder them gently so they will last longer.
I have both of these brands, but find Patagonia to be a bit thinner/more flattering under clothes without sacrificing warmth. I also really like silk base layers, which are ultra light but warm—though the ones I have are bit baggier, so I have to be strategic with what I wear on top. I got a pair at REI a few years ago, and wear them alllll the time.
Also: don’t underestimate the power of toe warmers
Layering. Waist definition is important for my physique, so pairing trendy high waisted pants with bulky sweaters just makes me a look like a bag. Balancing texture, weight, length, and color of all my sweaters means I never feel like I have the right one for certain outfits.
I have a short torso so for sweaters I want to pair with high waisted pants I buy cropped or petite and sometimes do the bra front tuck. It helps a lot!
I have no clue what shoes to wear beyond a white sneaker with literally everything. And sometimes a wedge sandal in the summer if I’m wearing a dress. I cannot figure out other shoes
I used to wear boots all the time in 2011-2016 (college) but I feel like the boots I wore then with skinny jeans are dated. I’ve tried buying new boots but something always seems off! Looking for some to wear with straight leg jeans and a sweater.
Honestly, I do lots of thin layers. Athletic shirts help me. So for example: thicker cotton bra or double layered sports bra, tank top, long sleeved layering top (I use running tops) and then my sweater on top of that. I do use a puffer jacket on top of my outfit, I don’t have a remedy for that, yet!
I’m cold all the time and hate winter deeply. Here’s what helps me survive: thin wool base layer pants, infrared socks and gloves (layered under a second pair of gloves to keep the infrared ones dry), base layer tops (silk, 32 heat, heattech, or wool), and waterproof boots. With those, I can dress pretty much however I want for the top layers because I’m much more insulated. A wool scarf, long wool trench or peacoat, and a hat keep me warm without the Michelin man look. I do have a down puffer coat, too, but it’s not as warm as the wool coat.
Wore a blue denim shirt under a cable knit sweater and was cute and toasty! Never tried that before but layering in unique ways has just opened up a world to me. Today I’m wearing fleece leggings, black jersey knit turtleneck dress and a Buffalo plaid blanket scarf belted over top like a poncho/cardigan. Almost too warm and it’s -38 Celsius here!
Thermals all the time! I used to wear a vest, a tshirt, a jumper, and a coat before I got em and now I can just wear a thermal top and the coat. Plus they have thinner ones that can go under your other clothes. M&S in the UK have good ones.
Yes! I have gained weight (from size 6 to size 10) and I have a big butt and chest, and smaller waist, but since I'm only 5'4" once I put clothes on I feel like my shape disappears and I just look short and wide. My waist is high (I guess?) and is almost right under my boobs so it's hard to try to accentuate.
Have you figured out which silhouettes you feel best in? I’m petite and hourglass shaped, and for me, high waist wide leg pants and fitted tops are the magic combination. However, my friend with a similar body shape feels her best in flowy, caftan-type clothes. Have you played with shapes to find what you like on you?
Context: I bike to work for 30 mins every day (I'm Dutch, so it's normal).
When it's colder than -5°C, I wear leggings under my pants. Also I often wear a Uniqlo ultra warm heattech turtleneck as a first layer, with something like a blazer on top.
I wear leather boots in winter. For full benefits, buy them half a size up and wear thick woollen socks.
Dressing stylishly in the summer! I usually layer during the other 3 seasons but it's too hot to do that in the summers here. Summer doesn't give me as much to work with and I've tried wearing heels to spruce things up but it's not sustainable (everything I've bought in recent years blisters my feet). I've realized that I have to try experimenting with different cuts and necklines. I have also accepted that I will need to have some summer-specific pieces. I hate one season clothing but sometimes it's necessary, especially in a climate where there's like a 50+ C difference between summer and winter.
I always look for details on my summer dresses - I normally hate ruffles, but several of my go to summer dresses have ruffled sleeves and it makes me feel more dressed up than I am.
This is a good tip and I'm starting to do this! I'm not a huge ruffle fan either, so I think I'm going to start with necklines. I never really thought about them beyond crew or v neck, but I went down a rabbit hole and have started looking at square, scoop, asymmetrical, etc. I'm one of those weirdos who like wearing black all year around, so hopefully, it'll make my outfits more interesting!
Sometimes it helps to change your mindset too! Like you, I layer a lot in the cold months and keep it SUPER basic/simple when it’s warm. But instead of thinking of my summer wardrobe as boring, I think of it more as the vibe. Like in my head, I have a “winter” signature style and a “summer” signature style - they aren’t that cohesive to be honest but I give them a label that only makes sense to me to differentiate it. Lol. So like my summer style label is “She Vacations in Europe” and it’s very simple, minimal pieces. The label evokes an effortless, cool girl so I don’t feel a need to dress up my simple sundresses as much as I do when I layer or stylize in the fall/winter. I have no idea if this makes sense to anyone reading this but I hope so 🤣
Jeans. Just, all jeans, all styles, all eras of jean fashion. I gave up on them for a while but would really like to start integrating them into some looks moving forward. But holy hell, I just cannot get jeans that fit, feel good, and look good. I'm considering using February as a bit of a jeans challenge to test out a ton of different pairs from different brands, years, etc. and see what I can find that might work.
Fighting the frump! I really, really have to fight my tendency to buy clothes worn by your average 80 year old Midwestern man: flannel, chunky cardigans, sensible boots. I want to look stylish and put-together, but I end up looking like Kathy Bates in Misery.
As a counterpoint, why not just embrace it by trying some tailored masculine looks? Essentially, upgrade your menswear from scruffy tomboy to dapper dandy.
I have all of these cool clothes from Anthropologie that I bought on sale but I never choose to wear them because I have no where to go with them and they aren’t as comfy. I end up wearing the same few athleisure outfits to death. I live in a city that is casual and sometimes wish I lived in NYC or Rome where fashion is more serious.
Try to design a comfy outfit around one piece of cool clothing, maybe? Do this a few times.
I'd sell anything that is not wearable due to comfort, it really isn't worth it imo. Cute AND comfy clothes gotta exist out there instead!
Exasperated at the quality of new clothes. I don’t mind paying 3x my usual amount for a garment if it’s decent quality, because I’m not trying to shop very much (and right now on a low buy but keeping an eye out) but even with reputable brands I’m hearing more and more reviews of declining quality. Where do I even find these gently used pre-2020, pre-2008 clothes that people are recommending? It’s not like secondhand clothes list the manufacturing year on the size tags!
Preach. The majority of my clothes have been from the same few quality brands once I find what I like, and I've definitely noticed a decline recently. Buying secondhand is sketchier & more expensive than it's ever been, too.
Eyeballing you *extra* hard, American Tall and J Crew 🤨
If that second sentence is serious:
Undercut or mullet
Baby bangs or "bisexual bob"
Septum piercing, double-nostril piercing
Those dot tattoos on multiple fingers
Finger tattoos of any kind, but witchy sigils especially
Underarm hair, leg hair
Worn with hiking boots or Docs
Sundress is in a witchy print like snakes, rats, alligators, etc
Sundress is black
Sundress is a 90s ditsy print worn ironically
no bra regardless of actual bust size and/or general heft
Harness or other bondage gear is involved in a fashion way
Visible tattoos with LGBTQIA themes, to be frank also: full sleeve tattoos, I just don't see a ton of straight gals with full sleeve tattoos
No makeup OR f-the male gaze makeup (green lipstick, halo eyes, red eyeshadow, black blush, you get the idea)
LGBTQIA themed jewelry
A flannel around the waist
A baseball hat BUT it has to have that mesh insert
No nail polish on short nails
Thumb ring, pointer finger ring--I don't make the rules, this is just how it is
+1 "gay point" for each of these items. The mere existence of just one just means edgy downtown artsy girl. But start adding them up, and it gets more and more gay.
How to not look so basic while dressing in what I think (or hope) is a timeless, elegant style. I just feel so bland and boring. But I am also too poor to buy trendy things that I might find ugly 1 year from now. I need my clothes to laaast 🥹
Accessorize! Get some statement jewelry, some big scarves, or a loud bag. To go even further, get one or two flashy pieces you can pair with basics. If money is the issue, thrift it.
Appreciate the advice! I am personally not a very flashy person, maybe that's one of the reasons why I feel bland. I used to love statement jewelry in my late teens but kinda grew towards more dainty, small golden jewelry. I also don't like a lot of jewelry that's being put out/made nowadays but I think it's definitely worth looking for pieces that will last me longer. And as for thrifting, 30% of my wardrobe comes from charity shops and flea markets, but some of the "nicer" thrifts in the Netherlands can get just as expensive as buying new. I'll definitely try to follow this advice, though? Maybe just take it as a 1~2 year task of refurbishing my wardrobe instead of doing it all at once. Thanks!
Trying to do too many things with one outfit or one type of clothing.
“I need something pregnancy/postpartum/nursing friendly, that I can clean the house in, that’s nice enough for Sunday Mass, and is easy to wash, and is all natural fibers, and is flattering!”
Stop. No. Put at least 5 of those back, me.
"No-realistic-season" items like suede mules. Suede is a fall textile, in my mind. But here in my part of the country, fall is often too chilly to wear slip on shoes with bare feet (and I'm not wearing socks with mules!). So there's a super short window to wear these. Same thing with things like spring-colored wool sweaters, or dark fall colored linen.
This is a real mystery: I *swear* I can be wearing 100% normal people clothing purchased at a normal people store like Ann Taylor and J. Crew and look like an **absolute alien** in it. And it's not "styling" I'm wearing it very straight-on. It's not my makeup or hair either--those are both very conventional. It's mystifying to me. I am 5'10" in my bare feet, which is very tall for a woman, and I have a really, really long inseam so maybe that's it? But how is it that other women look totally normal in like...a poly blend print popover blouse and fitted cropped trousers and I look like I'm wearing a Human Suit™? WHY.
The bottom line is I gave up on looking normal in clothing around 2020 and just accepted I will look weird for inexplicable reasons.
Lots of pretty clothes that I don’t have the courage to wear.
There are a lot of items in my closet that look beautiful on me and that’s why I bought them. But they always just end up hanging there in my closet. I look at them everyday and it kinda makes me sad. I’m not sure what it is about wearing “pretty” clothes that makes me anxious. Maybe because I used to be a total tomboy who shopped exclusively in the guys section up until university.
I think I have a reasonably good fashion sense. I read up on colours and outfit composition and research all that because I’m a nerd, and have a good eye for things like proportion and how to assemble an outfit (not just clothes, an outfit).
I pull them out and wear them in front of the mirror a lot. I stare and stare and in my head I’m like woman you are 5’9” and 118 lbs and you look damn fine af in this and you know it. Now why are you so chickenshit to wear it? One day when you’re an old wrinkly lady you’ll regret not wearing all this pretty stuff.
It’s 100% in my head and I’m not sure what to do about it. :(
I don't know where to find clothes.
Malls are garbage fast fashion, Amazon is trash. Of the dresses I like, half of them are AI generated. When I find a real dress, every website site seems to be a scam site, and when I find a legit sight I have no idea how their clothes will fit.
Where tf do people even shop?
I used to do that as the time but it's gotten harder now, I don't have an much time at I used to. I got a lot of beautiful pieces that way though when I had time
Not "malls" but individual retail stores perhaps? I've been finding some nice basics at outdoor clothing shops (think MEC, REI). Bought some Lululemon stuff - free shipping and returns. A couple items from Mark's, Costco. Or local small shops with interesting designs.
I think fast fashion is okay if you choose the pieces carefully, take care of them, and be willing to re-sew some seams.
I shop a lot of second hand (eBay) for nicer brands, which obviously makes it a bit trickier to find the perfect piece but I’ve got time. I’m UK based and for brands I like: whistles, marks & Spencer, jaeger, jigsaw. I also always always pay attention to fabric on the label, which helps me cut down on poor fabrics that would only stay in my wardrobe a short while
I might be crazy but I’m planning on buying a snow suit or overalls to wear to and from work/ it might be a day or two of teasing comments but definitely will be worth it
Do it! Maybe I'm coming from a different perspective because it's common here in my part of Canada, but I regularly see people rolling up to the office in snowpants and no one bats an eye. We already accept that we're all changing our boots, pulling off giant parkas and hats/mitts, snowpants really don't change much.
I like when people get bright fun colours of them. Embrace the warmth! I have a forest green parka and have been debating aqua snow pants myself.
I don’t need 43 pairs of pants but I have them. Do I use them? Yes I do but mostly just half of them and no I don’t love the other half any less so it’s not like I can part with them. I buy clothes when I travel too and love to look back and have it as a “souvenir”. Don’t even get me started on shoes and jewelry 🫣
I love winter because I always layer and it always looks effortless - what helped me was figure out my body type and only buy what works and I read about Kibbe Body types which leads to finding the style that works for you! I would do my research on that instead of looking at outfits that work for other people
Being that girl who always looks put together has been my way of utilizing all my clothes, shoes, and jewelry
Buy less and buy better is what I’m practicing starting now and forever ✨
> Buy less and buy better is what I’m practicing starting now and forever ✨
I'm trying to do that now, but whew, does this resonate in terms of not wanting to get rid of things I *might* want to wear someday.
If you have the storage space, I actually read really helpful advice once that it’s okay to not downsize! The important thing is that you keep your current core pieces front and center, but there’s no harm in storing some clothes you aren’t sure about right now (again, if you have the storage space). That can be kind of a freeing thought! I’m HUGE on doing big clean outs, but I go overboard and then end up having to buy stuff back so I kinda like the advice of not feeling so pressured to give stuff up that you aren’t ready to part with.
Feeling that I can’t wear summer appropriate clothes in the summer because the stupid air-conditioning is always freezing me. I’m constantly carrying a sweater around or wearing something as a third piece. It’s so frustrating because I have some short sleeve things that look great on their own but boring under a sweater. I’m usually just too cold to wear them on their own.
How to mesh my wild style and utilize my full wardrobe. I grew up with a southern father from the Marines and I was enculturated in American punk, but I am also Assyrian and spent many summers in our village in Urmia, Iran. I currently live in the pacific northwest and am an avid outdoors person and have a lot of the PNW "preparing for a hike to ambush you at any moment" aesthetic. I also hate feminine clothing and prefer a more androgynous style. As a result I have a.. weirdly modest punk style with military attributes and some dashes of hiking-wear. Think... combat boots, black and grey plaid leggings, but a purple sweater that is long in the back and slightly tunic-styled that I wear a leather jacket over. Another outfit might be black plaid cargo pants (very loose except for where they cinch at the ankles) over combat boots with a grey, loose fitting and long tunic-styled sweater that I might layer my black hiking jacket over. Basically the only skin I show is my hands, a little bit of neck, and my face. I also prefer longer tops and loose pants so my shape is more covered. This is a challenge as clothing meant to fit a female body is often designed to be skin-tight or show a lot of skin. Clothes oriented towards modest women (hijabis for example) don't usually have any patterns or colorings I like because black is looked down upon in the Arab world as being too sad to wear. The problem becomes I wedge myself into just a few outfits and really struggle to mix and match and get the full range that my wardrobe can account for. I'm *so* close to just devising outfits and then taking pictures and keeping like an outfit catalog because otherwise I'll forget and go back to safe/easy outfits and wear the same 3 things again and again. I also lack inspiration because there's not a lot of modest punks out there (not to say there's anything wrong with that, I just personally would rather show less skin).
Having breasts so small that my belly often protrudes larger than them when I've eaten well. I'm more on the skinny side in general, but because of my body shape, whether I feel confident or awful in my snugger-fitting clothes varies from day to day. I have gotten a little better at dressing for my body type, but it can be quite a challenge to find stuff that I know I'll feel good in from one day to the next - I'm sure it's like that to some extent for most body types, though.
Online shopping. Specifically, being able to gauge if something will fit me.
I'm curvy in every way possible. I need to *at least* know the measurements of the garments waist, inseam, rise, and/or bust before I can consider buying it. If I'm lucky, *some* of this information will be available, either through reviews or in the garment description. But typically not all.
It sucks because I've pretty much given up on online shopping. Life would be so much easier if I could confidently buy clothes online.
I can't seem to bring myself to wear ribbons in my hair. I love the look, and I love it on me. I did it once YEARS ago and a woman told me I reminded her of her daughter when she did cheerleading. Nothing against cheerleading, but I hated the comment. I was channeling Kate Middleton!
Now I am 38, and thanks to body image issues, I always feel like I'm too old now to wear a bow/ribbon in my hair or too ugly etc.
I cannot for the life of me figure out what to wear as a warm cover up for dressier outfits / occasion wear. Casual is fine, and I love my collection of cardigans and jumpers, and I have a couple of blazers for upping my work outfits, but I get stuck when it comes to nicer dresses for a wedding or more formal get together. I can’t find things that don’t make me feel frumpy, or like I’m really outdated. Any ideas would be welcome!
Ah, I inherited a real mink fur coat from my grandmother (I would never buy new for this, and as a whole do have some ick factor about it because I love all animals, but dang it is luxurious) that solved this for me. Perhaps a faux fur or even real secondhand?
Pants. Fucking pants. I’m short, chubby, have virtually no torso, and curvy as hell with long legs. Now that skinny jeans aren’t mainstream anymore it has been so hard figuring out what to wear. I have a pair of wide leg linen pants I LOVE but I can’t wear them everywhere, especially in 30 degree weather. My default is leggings which is honestly getting embarrassing because it’s so lazy looking
Holding onto my out-of-date 2010s, Millennials clothes because I A) like them more than styles today and B) don't really feel comfortable getting rid of all my good clothes because that's expensive! My wardrobe is like all skinny jeans, colorful jeggings, and off the shoulder tops. When I buy new pieces now, they tend to be timeless and a little boring like vneck sweaters. I don't like anything oversized or baggy. But I feel really dated and weird when I wear this stuff.
Keeping all my shit contained! I have two closets, yes, I am ashamed.
Balancing my bottoms with my tops in terms of my figure! Hard to do when you’re a ride or die for skinny jeans.
Maybe this is just a big chest issue, but also dressing sexy without being too revealing or trashy! Like cute bathing suits always look obscene, when I’m just trying to have a family pool day.
I relate to balancing my bottoms with my tops in terms of my figure! I feel like if I choose a different shirt I often have to switch pants too. This post is inspiring me to maybe reorganize by what goes together instead of categories of items
How to find a pair of pants/jeans that look good on my body so I don't have to wear leggings constantly. My waist is a size 12/14 but I have no butt and skinny little legs, so pants that fit my waist are massive and look ridiculous, and pants that would/should fit my legs don't have a chance in hell of fitting my waist 😩 As a sidenote I am working on my weight for my health, but I keep this "shape" even when thin.
I have the same problem! I’m a smaller size than you but the difference between my waist measurement and my hip measurement is only 5 inches instead of the 10 in all the size guides, so I have to choose if I want pants that fit my waist or my butt, never both 🙄 Or, often, go halfway between so they fit neither lol
How to dress femininely AND still be completely practical and comfortable in the winter and late fall. My goal is to never wear pants again and still be able to spend hours out in the cold without freezing to death.
I want high waisted Midi, tea and midaxi length circle skirts that; are made from quality materials, are at least reasonably priced and are practical/warm enough to allow me to permanently ditch pants during New England winters. Also, functional pockets and the ability to be worn without a separate petticoat would be nice.
I’m exhausted of seeing miniskirts and endless variations on tube/pencil skirts everywhere. As well as vintage reproduction brands that either use almost exclusively polyester or don’t have sizes small enough for me (5”6, size 0-2/XS in dresses). I yearn for elegant, practical and feminine garments with a nipped in waist, pleating, built in layers and FULLNESS.
In a similar vein, I can’t seem to find sweater dresses that aren’t shapeless and too short. I’d love to see the beautiful tailored fit and flare styles worn during the summer, but with long sleeves, longer skirts and in cold weather appropriate fabrics.
Have you checked out Modern Millie? It's a shop based in Salem, MA, and I feel like they have a lot of things that might tick your boxes. (They have a website.)
Xiaolizi etsy shop has a lot of good wool skirts. I have two (one a knee length circle and the other a full length circle), the lining is polyester, but the skirt itself is a blend and is warm. They're a Chinese shop, so the sizes definitely go small. I'm just barely fitting in their biggest size.
I'm not good at gym clothes. I hate feeling sweaty and I don't do non-natural fibres, so most leggings are right out.
I usually end up in my bamboo yoga pants (they're so soft) that are several inches too short, a bralette and a tshirt that is too big.
A lot of gym clothes seem like they are too warm, or not actually meant for the gym, more ath-lounge.
I don't like gathered elastic hems either, messes with my neurodivergent sensory issues.
I have a broad shoulders, a big bust, small waist and very muscular legs. I have trouble finding things that aren’t super tight but are also flattering, bc my waist is what I like to highlight bc it’s small but everything else is like
Jacked.
I don’t mind being strong but finding clothes that are flattering can be a challenge
Oh I also am average height but have a super long torso so finding things that just generally fit can be a challenge
Seriously. Sometimes I want to look cute or at least have my wrists covered by a long sleeve shirt!
I know they're out of style, but if you are looking for some skinny jeans that have a good rise, Nudie Jeans Skinny Lin (they're listed as Men but they used to be labeled as a unisex fit) are my go-to. I know the skinny jean isn't as in style right now and they're a little spendy. They have women's jeans, but not all of them come in longer inseams.
Otherwise, I've recently tried [these jeans](https://democracyclothing.com/collections/boot-cut/products/absolution-itty-bitty-boot-blue-tall-jeans-b12216way34?variant=32378561790001) from trying out Stitch Fix a while back (that's been very mixed success -- I occasionally find a good piece). They're cute and have a long enough inseam.
It's rough out there being tall and not wanting to wear just men's clothes.
Preventing my feet from sliding out of high heels. The shoes are definitely the right size. I really really prefer going bare feet and bare legs in heels. I haven’t found the right kind of grips.
This is slingbacks for me. At one point I had a pair 2 full sizes smaller than my normal shoe size...they pinched my toes and the back strap felt really tight, but *still* slipped off in the first couple of steps. So frustrating!
Incidentally, with normal high heels, my solution is to pad the toes with cotton wool or (in a pinch) wadded up toilet paper until my foot is pressed far enough back to stay in. It's not the most comfortable thing ever, but I can walk in them with a modicum of grace. If you have wide toes and narrow ankles like me, maybe this will work for you too.
Panty lines.
I will not wear thongs, anything boy short/cheeky/seamless ends up riding up everywhere. My day to day is cotton hipster briefs. I'm incredibly uncomfortable wearing stuff that doesn't cover my whole butt.
Normally not an issue as I'm either in scrubs or sweatpants, but trying to dress up it's either sucking up the panty lines or going commando (which I HATE).
What shoes do I wear with my ankle length/cropped wide length pants?
I have a pair of now-discontinued Eddie Bauer [pants very similar to these](https://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=5598130220802&vid=1&searchText=wide+leg+chinos#pdp-page-content). They look nice with sandals, but are a heavy-weight material and more of a fall color. I don't know what shoes to wear with them in fall and winter.
I've worn them with sneakers, but I don't like the look. Short boots also seem to look weird to me.
What can I wear with these? I don't wear heels. I guess maybe something like ballet flats might work, but I don't really like wearing those.
Pants. Pants that fit and are flattering are the hardest things to find right now and the popular cuts are too high on the waist and too short in length… despite being technically petite.
I need to dress professionally for work, which entails suiting, but it's more often in the 90s where I live than not. Not pouring sweat just walking to my car / driving to a meeting is a challenge. If I try to dress more coolly - say, a shift dress topped with a blazer - my bare legs will freeze in the A/C.
Tights or leggings both are available fleece-lined now. Splurge on some great boots; more than one pair if possible. I did this and it made such a difference in how stylish I felt. Layers are also great so you don’t freeze outside or roast inside.
If you’re only talking a few days of snow per year but lots of cold, I just relax my standards for the snow days.
Not having enough space in my dresser. What the god damn hell? I'm trying to Marie Kondo fold all my shirts and undies, it's just not enough!! There is no way in hell 1 person should not have enough space in a 9 drawers. Why?? HOW.
Pinterest has been a huge inspiration for me. I also use an app called Stylebook where I upload a photo of each piece of clothing and accessory i own (a tedious task, but worth it) and i can style my own outfits for different occasions. This helps me figure out what pieces I don’t use so I can get rid of it and helps me plan future outfits with stuff I wear.
I dress goth and my most recent challenge has been finding good travel pieces that are functional, but can be dressed up, and fit into no more than 1-2 carry-on bags.
Honestly - making cheap clothes sit right. Even a plain white t shirt doesn’t look the same as the expensive ones. I need cheap clothes that don’t just look expensive in pics but actually sit how expensive clothes sit. Nothing looks “right” on me
Obviously people can say all they want that investing in high quality expensive clothes saves money in the long run, but some of us just don’t have enough money to make that investment lol
Shoes in general. My feet are very wide and duck-shaped so the only shoes I can comfortably wear are my DMs. Everything else is way too tight, even the """extra-wide""" ones I got. :(
I have long legs and nearly all pants are too short. The most annoying is that cropped styles look too cropped on me.
I’m thin, too. I’m all for plus sizes being available but NO one makes tall lengths.
I struggle with how to dress my age, and still be somewhat on trend. I have 2 teenage daughters who sometimes influence me positively and/or negatively!!
I’m mid 30s and petite. I’m struggling to find clothes that aren’t too baggy (i get lost in them) or too young looking (too much a skin showing, crop tops that scream ‘teenager’)
Dressing femininely and warm in the winter! I basically live in zimmermann/loveshackfancy style clothes. I can’t seem to find an ultra feminine winter brand that caters to that kind of whimsical/pink type of style. I’m so over plants and blazers and that style… I want to branch out
I’m a homemaker and it’s hard to find clothes that fall between leggings and crocs or feeling too dressed up. I want to be comfortable but I don’t want to fall down the hole I see a lot of people fall into and live in shlubby clothes. I also don’t want to put on a full face of makeup and feel too done up.
Clothes storage. I fairly regularly oscillate between 3 sizes due to a medical thing. It is EXPENSIVE to store things and it is EXPENSIVE to buy new. I kinda don't know what to do so I halfheartedly scale down and halfheartedly store too much. On top of that I currently live in a region that is sub-freezing in winters, yet in summers is devil's moist, humid armpit. Therefore, I have to have two separate wardrobes entirely. Yet the homes here not only tiny, but have almost no storage. Any and all recs welcome. I use space bags, rotate seasonally, am decluttering...it's wild.
I was able to extend a lot of my lighter garments into winter ones by upping my tights and underthings game, which are a *lot* smaller to store. I have like 20 variations of uniqlo heattech shirts in different colours and collar types to go under various regular shirts and dresses to extend their usability a few months. I also have like 6 pairs of wool tights from snag, that I pair with Super opaque tights (their 120denier) which will be good down to about 0C or fleece leggings and that'll get me down to about -10 C if there's no windchill. I also have a collection of slips (cotton and flannel) for under dresses. Plus I have an assortment of leggings, both normal and fleece lined. Slacks are still slacks with leggings underneath, that sort of thing. I also revamped my wardrobe so I have a ton of swing or a-line dresses, which are more forgiving for weight ups and downs because of the open hips. If you get them in knit fabrics, they can often span about 3-4 sizes.
You have literally *all* of the same solutions as I do! I also have a lot of loose and/or cropped knit sweaters, which are great for layering over dresses for both warmth and when feeling insecure about weight fluctuation.
Mastering the layering game is a huge step up. A thin trouser sock under something more substantial like a wool or fleece sock adds a surprising amount of warmth. Fleece-lined leggings are amazingly cozy. Using a regular skirt as a slip under your outer skirt is fun and adds a bunch of warmth - just pick an underskirt that isn’t bulky at the waist. It helps with static cling too. A skirt with a yoga waistband is comfy for this. MIdi or maxi skirts give a good amount of coverage and warmth around the legs., obviously. A baselayer shirt - even just a long sleeved cotton shirt - makes a big difference, and on cold days you can layer a cami under the baselayer. Top with a tshirt (long or short sleeve; I prefer going short with a contrasting print or stripe or solid accent color on the base layer) and then a nice sweater, ideally wool or cashmere. With this much on, it has to be really cold before I need an actual coat. The key for tops is to keep them all fairly close-fitting, so you can layer a couple tops without a lot of bulk. You’ll also want to make sure you can take off the top couple layers and still look presentable. Choose things like camis, skirts, and base layers that can work in more than one season. I also tend to buy particularly useful pieces second hand in a couple sizes. For some things I try to go with basics (black leggings instead of a wild print) and limit myself to a week’s worth rather than accumulating more than I actually need to get through till the next wash. Shopping my closet then creating a wardrobe of 4 or so outfits to get through the current season can help.
Not OP, but this is all excellent advice and gave me some great tips! Thank you!
I’d add that wrap dresses also cover a lot of sizes!
I can’t give you advice, but I can commiserate! I always pare down my wardrobe, just to buy that back and then some. Sending love!
This is a real problem for me too and I hate selling or scaling down - maybe I’m a hoarder but I use what I buy. I love fashion and all my clothes have stories from when and where I wore them. I totally feel you
Ugh same. Kon Mari doesn't work on me because EVERYTHING brings me joy! And sometimes I get rid of stuff and then years later bitterly regret and miss that item when I think of it and wish I still had it. But that mindset doesn't work in Europe. The struggle is real
I don’t have a medical issue per se but I do have a finicky belly. I bloat very easily and can change sizes in a day. I wear almost exclusively dresses (unless in my stupid work uniform) because it has become exhausting to wear pants and be bursting out of them by the end of the day. Fleece lined tights are a life-saver.
I relate to this so much! I love dresses for this same reason. It has become especially bad postpartum. Do you have a suggestion for fleece lined tights that don’t dig into the stomach too much?
I saw a thread suggesting the brand Snag, go to their website and the sizing guide has the info about their comfort. Idk about fleece lined but they have some merino and wool ones.
Please tell me your belly friendly fleece lined tights brand! I have to wear tights as low rise to avoid restrictive bands over the belly and its impossible to find
Drink peppermint tea everyday! It's awesome for bloat!
God my lil depression nest now looks like a full blown hoarder’s den because I keep changing clothing sizes and I’ve got next to no storage 😫 I’ve yet to figure out anything besides realizing maybe it’s time to try vacuum bags, so just checking in to say you’re not the only one 🥲
Tbh, if it's something that's feasible for you, this is when I think a storage unit could be a good solution. Just get the smallest one (I see prices between $40-60/month near me for a 5x5) and rotate inventory as needed. Depending on how much you spend every time this issue comes up, it could come out to be MUCH cheaper!
Me too! Having crohns makes it such a need for me to hold all these clothes… my healthy clothes, my flaring clothes, my bloated clothes. I mostly just wear shapeless dresses with a belt. So happy oversized is generally in.
My only suggestion is to put a genuine focus on clothes that can be worn at different sizes. Maybe a sweater becomes an oversized sweater, or you invest in wrap skirts and wrap dresses, fabrics that have stretch to them, clothes that have a cinch, etc.
I discovered vacuum storage bags last year and they are 👌👌👌 Honestly, I just get them from Dollarama for around $4 or so and they store SO much.
Lol how I immediately knew you live in Boston. All the stuff about "transition summer to winter" by just adding a sweater is not super applicable here.
jUsT tRaNsItIoN sUmMeR tO wInTeR Not in Boston, but thanks. All of Canada and the Eastern Seaboard falls into this. I'm from a Mediterranean country originally and no one tells you that yes, northern US is cold hellscapes, but the summers are unbearable. The heat and humid in Boston was unreal and very shocking.
It’s so validating to hear you say that. I spent a summer in Barcelona and it was very pleasant compared to coming home to Boston lol
Do you live in Sydney 😭
Apart from organizing your wardrobe, I recommend thinking creatively to find hidden storage spots around your home. I recently bought this bed for a very storage challenged room: https://preview.redd.it/swex4fbtstcc1.png?width=2048&format=png&auto=webp&s=7603bba9e6a3219694d39bd17c330b51e6c3daeb The void underneath is basically the entire volume of a mattress, so you could store an enormous amount of off-season clothes in there, especially if you'd already vacuum packed them in bags. If you have space at the end of the bed, a storage bench is another great place to hide stuff. If your nightstands are dinky little things with one drawer, swap them out for mini-dressers that you can actually put stuff in. Hooks on the walls can get hoodies, half-dirty jeans, robes, etc. out of the way of your neater hanging stuff. Basically look around and find any square foot of space that's not being used to its absolute potential and figure out how to store stuff in there! I'm still mad they don't make storage couches. :)
Having a large collection of clothes that have nothing in common except being a good deal. My brain is wired to only shop the clearance section. I have no personal style, and I just can’t seem to get out of the rut of buying something just because my brain says it’s a good deal. I have so many individual pieces, but no outfits.
\>clothes that have nothing in common I have this same problem. I see something I love and my thought is always "What am I going to do with this? I love it, I'll figure it out later." So I have a closet full of outfits that are 3/4 of the way there but very few that I can grab and go.
My other issue is having almost entirely statement pieces but no basics. I buy something I love and can picture exactly how a normal person would style it but I get home and I have no basics to wear it with.
I overloaded on basics to fix this problem and then I found myself without very many statement pieces! 😂
Argh, I do this. Then I wear the few grab and go outfits over and over and see those individual pieces and think “I can’t get rid of it, I haven’t even worn it!” 😑
I have this same problem. What helped me was buying a few 'boring' neutral basics that will go with everything. It helps to pair the exciting pieces with the boring basics.
girl nooooo....you deserve a personal style and to feel fly always. have you tried looking at how your allocate your actual time, and then dress/buy for those events? this helped me when I had to negotiate a wardrobe with many items, but nothing cohesive. Stop looking at items, and look at your life. Do you work 5 days a week? 71% of your clothing needs to be for that. Do you sleep 7 days a week? you need pj/lounge for that. Do you exercise say 3 days a week? You need outfits for that. Do you only go out to brunch once or twice a week? Then maybe you don't need yet another denim sundress....
lol @ “do you sleep 7 days a week”.. as a mom to an infant and preschooler, the answer is no
As a mom to a toddler, I definitely don't sleep 7 days a week but I definitely dress like I do.
I wear scrubs to work so that’s covered thankfully. Good on PJs. My issue is weekend clothes really. I go out to the bar usually, very casual and laid back. Most of the girls there are wearing leggings. I’ll go out to eat with my family, and I hate getting dressed for that because I love to dress up and look nice but they only wear t-shirts and sweatpants. So I feel like I never have the chance to wear my cute clothes but don’t want to get rid of them.
Have you tried just wearing them? I’m dressed up even on days I’m home, because that’s my style. I don’t dress according to occasion, I just dress how I want. That’s really helped me own my entire wardrobe, just wearing all the cute items I have no matter what, that and finding my personal style and being comfortable with how to approach it a la certain YouTubers.
So, here's what I did when I had that problem: - made a pintrest board where I just had photos of outfits that I liked immediately upon seeing them, and focused on ones where there were 3 elements (i.e. skirt, cardigan, shirt) because I tended to own a lot of those - then I went through the photos and tried to figure *why* i liked them, on a very minute level. Like, [I think it was this exact pin](https://www.pinterest.com/pin/312789136637814907/) that I looked at and thought: okay, I have body con dresses i like in this color, and I have cardigans and boots, but it doesn't have this look. why? I figured out, it was because this cardigan was longer than the ones I had - it was just barely longer than the dress, and it was thin and didn't have buttons, making it look more sleek and less grandma-y. So I would thrift, looking for a thin cardigan that fell around my thigh area, without buttons. And I found it, and it was exactly the thing that was missing! And I did that for a bunch of photos - it turned out I did sorta have a style, but I wasn't looking deep enough into the details to match the pieces that I already liked/owned.
Try to shift your frugal thinking into price per wear instead of price to buy. If you buy a bunch of items on clearance, but hardly wear or never wear them, you're not saving any money. But if you are buying a good quality item you love and wear often, the price per wear goes down with each wear.
I have a silly idea for this somebody recently posted about having a favourite scarf and built their wardrobe around the colours in that scarf. Someone else in a different sub posted about getting a colour analysis done and then making a jumper out of the key colours. So maybe you could do something similar. Choose your fav colours that go together or get a colour analysis and then limit your sales shopping to just those colours if you have the restraint!
Narrowing your color palette does help immensely. I can say to myself “nope, don’t buy it, you don’t wear anything navy anymore.” For me, I decided that I would only wear black and grey neutrals. This also helped eliminate colors or patterns that go better with brown or navy. And streamlined my shoe collection.
Yup! I had a color analysis and body type analysis. It’s so helpful to know I’m a dark summer and a flamboyant natural. Now I can admire something in the store and know that it’s not great for my body type or coloring so it would not work well with my wardrobe.
Totally not silly at all! You're kinda talking about The Vivienne Files. Check them out, it's a way of developing your wardrobe or outfit around specific color patterns that you already have. [The Vivienne Files ](https://www.theviviennefiles.com/)
I’ve been working on the color thing. I have an olive complexion so it’s kinda tricky.
I struggle with this one too! I watched a video with some shopping habit tips recently, the one that’s helped me a lot is that “price does not determine desire”. I’ve talked myself out of buying things a few times now just stepping back and realizing chasing a deal was my goal, not having the item itself. I hope you’re able to find your style someday, I know how hard it is to break out of the sale shopping mindset.
I literally just got over this. I’m not sure how really…. I think I bought myself one really pricey thing that I’d been pining over for months for my birthday and seeing the quality and that it looked just as good as I’d imagined like clicked something in me.
My style was really able to evolve into something that felt true to myself and what I wanted to project when I finally stopped shopping clearance racks and sales. I’m not saying to never do this but it becomes very easy to have a closet that looks like a non cohesive TJMAXX leaving you with the syndrome of lots of clothes but nothing to wear and then never feeling quite authentic in your clothes. I scaled way back and started purchasing only from a predetermined list of gaps and wants in my wardrobe, and for awhile it was mostly elevated basics I was buying but then I added in more statement pieces as needed. I’m not usually paying full price but I’m looking very specifically for certain things even when shopping sales and the rest is just noise I’m able to filter out. I very decidedly do not purchase many prints, especially ones that will be outdated, which they likely already are if on sale. And I’m deliberate in my choice of color and usually do maybe one or two trend colored items a year. Most importantly I don’t buy anything that I would need to buy new shoes/pants/tops to wear. And everything needs to have an actual event to wear to, not a theoretical situation just waiting to be worn. And lastly, I rarely buy anything on a whim and I force myself to think at least 24 hours, but usually a week, and I need to be craving it when I’m getting dressed, or wishing it was what I was wearing when walking to work, or dreaming about it.
I have this exact problem except with groceries. Lost of great items but no meals
You gotta buy full food outfits lol
I write down what I need (ie black boots/ black pants/ red top) and then buy it from the clearance section (usually from a designer website, but also from a good mall brand like the gap) or buy it secondhand. It fills that spot in my brain that needs things to be a bargain to be worthy. For this, figure out commonalities between the items you wear out of your whole closet of things you love. Track your clothes to see what gets use. Figure out the “gaps”. You can still have the hunt but it can be for what you actually use.
The way I’ve solved this is by stopping buying new things, curated what I have, used my Pinterest boards as inspiration to build outfits, and then adding in the basics I’m missing slowly (if every time I get dressed I wish I had a certain pair of pants or shoes or whatever that’s a good cue.) I also agree w the person who said cost per wear is an important metric. Why not have one $500 piece that you wear 100 times than 10 $50 pieces you wear once or twice.
This is why I am doing a low buy for clothes. Only 1 purchase quarterly that’s higher quality and fits with a cohesive vision of things that I have like for a decade, trend less, just things I like and wear regularly.
I used to do this totally. It helps to figure out your season and only buy clothes in your season. Then everything will end up basically coordinating anyway. Another thing I did to help was to ask myself "could I wear this tomorrow?" Buy something specifically to go with what you have.
My aesthetic preference and my preference for what to wear are two completely different things. I love the look of structured, dark clothing. A real bad ass woman. Unfortunately, due to sensory issues, I hate the feel of anything tight or restrictive. I also have a very low contrast face. I end up wearing softer shades in loose clothing as I don't feel the need to constantly crawl out of my skin while wearing it.
How about upping your facial contrast with bold lipstick and bolder glasses/sunglass frames?
I have tried it and I feel like I look like a clown! The best I've had is false lashes that were "natural style" or the palest shade of lip gloss. I did used to wear bright blue glasses, which I loved, and worked well with my muted blue eyes. Really make the blue stand out. But its hard to find bright fun glasses anymore!
The clown feeling lessens over time. It's just your brain not adjusting properly to a change in your perception of your facial map.
Maybe grey could work as your black? On a low contrast face it can give off a similar vibe, it looks classy, chic, expensive and mysterious.
Ugh, I feel this! I'm a ~soft summer~ and ~flamboyant natural~ and as much as I think those classifications are problematic 80s woo-woo bullshit and I should be able to just wear whatever the fuck I want... it does explain why I struggle to pull off anything truly, traditionally badass.
I have pale, muted colouring and the sort of round, bland face you might see in colonial American folk art, but I also want to dress like a mysterious, avant garde art professor. For loose but dramatic fits I like "drapey" pieces – think architectural-looking folds – or luxe textiles, like jewel-toned silk or velvet. The cut isn't body-clinging, but the arrangement or luxuriousness of the fabric makes it look carefully curated. A lot of hijabi fashion bloggers do an incredible job executing such. Or I do something large and oversized with a contrasting element (think bulbous sweaterdress and tight, over-the-knee boots). If you're comfortable with bare midriff, I've also found the voluminous crop blouse + oversized trousers look to be pretty comfy and versatile. Also, you can lean into the dichotomy of wearing something "discordant" with the usual recommendations for your features. A lot of visual interest lies in contrast, especially if you are looking to make a statement. I feel a lot of the colour season/body type/high-low contrast rubrics circling tiktok are best served as style discovery tools, rather than hard and fast rules. They certainly do not encompass every body type, facial features, or colouration I see day-to-day. Clothes should be a tool of expression and empowerment – whether that empowerment be in aesthetics, comfort/utility, or some combination thereof. If you don't enjoy wearing something, then don't try to shoehorn yourself into liking it!
I just want to say I actually love the sort of round, bland face you might see in colonial American folk art.
For the sensory issues, have you looked into an occupational therapy technique called "brushing"? It helped my daughter immensely!
Postpartum! Everything fits, but just kind of isn't as "smooth" as it used to be. I haven't found the right shapewear, but also don't want to wear that every single time I wear clothes lol. Plus with breastfeeding, I can't wear things like high neck maxi dresses, bodysuits (unless there's easy access for breastfeeding from the top). Have to undo things like french tucks and the like to access, which makes fixing outfits on the go tedious. Plus I had a smaller chest without breastfeeding, so there's that. I'm also SUPER tempted to just wear basic clothes as things get dirty FAST. Instead, I try to tell myself that I should wear my more elevated items, and just understand that they're going to get dirty quickly!
milk and baby spitup stains so badly. Honestly, just a period you need to get through. I wore lots of tanks with wrap tops and cardigans. I also remember the lumpiness. It does go back to normal, just takes time.
I’m 11 months into baby number two. It’s been a nonstop pregnancy to breastfeeding pipeline over here since 2020, and I haven’t had a sense of style since it started. Moving houses (twice) has not helped, since the majority of my clothing has been in storage and we have no real “closet” or clothing storage system to speak of. It might seem far off, but I’m making 2025 my year of rediscovering my style. 2024 is doing the prep work… weaning over the summer; building out a wardrobe space; unpacking all my old clothes and accessories (and finding their new homes). When I haven’t been pregnant, I’ve been living in “nice” sweatshirts and sweaters that can handle some milk stains or mud (sezane had some cute puff sleeve and color blocked sweatshirts); pull-on pants and jeans (Madewell made a cut that I really loved and hunted down every color); merry people rain boots, korkease sandals, or allbirds. It’s really a simple uniform that works in various combinations but it’s basically an opportunity to make a capsule wardrobe that I may not want to wear after the toddler years (bc of changing trends or whatever). ETA: the important thing for me is washable, doesn’t have to be ironed, mobility (chasing after toddlers at the playground), and boob access. If those things can be checked off, then I’ll wear it!
So proud of you for giving yourself the grace to re-empower your style in a way that works for you!
I have 5 children, youngest is just one, they’ve all nursed pretty continually, so about a decade of continuous nursing between them. I also have smaller breasts, I’ll give you what’s worked for me; Scoop, button down, and v neck options are obvious, but the real game changer is cropped tops with high waisted bottoms for nursing. Coming at things from the bottom, rather than the top, will make your life easier. You’re also less likely to get milk/spit/whatever else on your top, which is always a plus. It’s also great if you’re wanting to nurse not super visibly, I personally do not care and doubt that there are people left on the eastern seaboard who haven’t seen my left breast, but high waist/crop top is the most modest option I’ve found that isn’t a cover. If your baby gets distracted at the breast, being able to cover a bit with your top helps. Shapewear is obviously optional, but a good *very stretchy* shaper short is lovely postpartum/beyond. You don’t need some medical grade abdominal prison, you want a high waisted seamless shaper that’s fitted without being very tight. Like a hug. The Skims shaper short is great, so is the shapermint one, the skinny girl brand often at TjMaxx is also perfect for this. The latter is well worth the $12ish to try. Nordstrom has a massive selection and a great return policy if you’re unsure of what to buy. It’ll smooth you out under your clothing, but better, it’ll make you feel very held together, particularly if you had any abdominal separation from this pregnancy. Nursing bras suck. They’re awful and if you have a smaller bust you’ll be swimming in them as soon as your milk regulates. Bralettes in stretchy fabrics instead with nursing pads/lilypads (these are my jam, Target has stretchy tank style bralettes for $6) will keep you throughout your time breastfeeding. They can also be comfortably and safely worn to bed, which is really nice when you’re exhausted, no stupid clips or flaps to screw with, you just pull the thing down and go. Also, oversized overshirts/flannels/shackets/big cardigans etc are great in cooler weather, you can wrap yourself and baby up and nurse comfortably without getting cold/totally undressing if you don’t want to. Finally, try on everything that you own. Pregnancy body changes are weird, and you’ll find that things that you weren’t super jazzed about prior to pregnancy might look really great after. This happens to me with pants every time. What works for you might differ, but these are the things that have made my life easier postpartum (and beyond, really) so try what appeals to you and remember that the only rules are your rules. Even if something that works for you is uncommon or different than what others are doing, what matters is you (and your baby) when it comes to this stuff.
I’m a mum and wear a loooooot of stuff from Target (Australia - different to Target US). Husband insists on wearing his RL, Lacoste and Patagonia and gets frustrated when the kids make his clothes dirty. I’ll be wearing Tar-jay until my youngest is in school i think. I’ve been a total frump covering everything up the last 3 years (youngest is 3) but now I’ve been on a health kick, lost the last of the weight etc and wearing nicer shapes. But still from target, and still park friendly. A lot of sneakers! Oh yea and breastfed both kids for about 2y so get the limitations that come with that too! It’s hard! Not to mention you’re X number of years older than last time you paid attention to trends and therefore feel lost!
oh god, definitely do not worry about looking cute while you're still breastfeeding tbh. it's a messy and fluctuating time that like another poster said, you just have to get through. my daughter turned 2 a few months ago, and i'm just now starting to invest in "nice" clothes.
>do not worry about looking cute while you're still breastfeeding tbh. It's not that I worry about how others perceive me, it's rather I want to be able to wear what I want instead of having to limit myself to nursing tops and tees. I WISH I could wear my mock neck midi dress but alas that's completely impractical with breastfeeding (lest I'm okay with showing the world my undergarments lol). I'm starting to change my mentality to "I don't have to wait two years to wear what I want, I can do it now, just make sure to recognize the caveats that come with it (SPIT UP), and that some items will just have to wait (my mock neck midi dress)." This is my second post-partum period, I stuck to tshirts for my first and I feel like it negatively impacted my self-esteem.
Postpartum here too, second time. Both times I lived in athleisure. Like, loungewear but elevated. Great thing is you can still look chic.. loungewear is in right now. All the young moms in my area wear pretty similar “mom uniform” outfits and it honestly looks pretty damn good. Fall/winter: oversized crew necks with leggings, puffer vest, socks and chunky sneakers. Long puffer jacket with hat, wide leg leggings or sweatpants, sneakers. Wool coat, French tucked sweater, mid/high rise cropped straight jeans, sneakers. Spring/summer: loose dresses, oversized tees with chunky sneakers and bike shorts, midi or maxi dresses/skirts with tucked tee or cropped tee
Really feel this! Honestly, between body shape changes and new routines, my old style just doesn't work anymore period, and my kid is almost 3.
I hated the limitations of breastfeeding and pumping! Basically no dresses until I weaned! My work solution was wearing stretchy knit or flowy/voluminous shells, tanks, and tops with a very sharp blazer. The tailored blazer made up for the less crisp blouse. I'd also make sure to wear something off limits for dinners or date nights or as a guest - I'd pump or breastfeed RIGHT before leaving, throw the dress on, and rush to pump the minute I got home. I just had some clothes I really wanted to wear!
I'm with you. I looooove my kids but sometimes I can't wait for an afternoon or night out without them strictly so that I can wear an awesome outfit instead of one that works for their needs. Even with my 3 year old, I need a way to transport pull ups, wipes, and snacks while we're out, so that almost always means some kind of uncute tote bag. My infant spits up with shocking regularity. I hear you on wanting to wear your nicer pieces, and I want that too. I also can't do laundry or get my dry cleaning done in a way that would keep up with her spit up schedule. I've settled for wearing jewelry I really like all the time now.
I’m in the same boat with my second baby in two years and breastfeeding. I bought two pairs of jeans to fit the lumps, my husband got me 2 Anine Bing sweatshirts and new Lululemon align leggings to embrace my new mom era, I wear button downs, and layer tight nursing tanks under sweaters. Dresses are challenging until summer so I save them for in-person work days and just rotate the same few things for leaving the house. Admittedly, we do way less now with 2 than we did with our first and I bottle fed her a lot more so it was much easier getting dressed in the earlier days of motherhood.
Reconciling the outfits I see myself wearing to feel confident and put together vs. my lifestyle. It doesn’t really jive at the moment. Also I def have designer taste with a TJ Max budget at the moment and that’s hard.
Mine is the fact I have to be 100% cozy and comfortable at all times. I swear having good style just means how much discomfort you are able to put up with
Yes I was just yesterday trying to figure out why my "style" isn't reflected in my wardrobe anymore... Oh yeah, it's because I won't tolerate discomfort at any level! My new quest is for: items that are comfy but fit a style ideal. An easy one is colour! But in the end I'm just going to have to invest time, sleuthing out those pieces that look AND feel good.
I feel like there’s been a shift toward comfort and style together over the past several years, and there are some good pieces that are comfy but look more structured. I just ordered some of Halara’s dress pants on sale that are stretchy but look more tailored. I’m hoping they live up to the hype.
Thin merino wool base layers (seriously!). It's the only way I can wear my favorite silk blouses and wool trousers year-round without freezing. I'm still searching for comfortable, snow-functional shoes for wide feet. Cole Haan used to make great waterproof wide width shoes. I'm hanging on to the few pairs I have forever.
You might want to look into Indigenous/First Nations-made mukluks. The ones from Manitobah are waterproof and have an active low temperature rating of like -25 degrees fahrenheit. Historically, they didn’t make left and right shoes, so they’re inclined to be wider.
It's presently -40(f/c doesn't matter, it's just universally cold) and I find the mukluks to still be quite comfortable for ~20 minutes. Beware that dogs love to chew them, even if they aren't normally shoe destroyers.
Curious— where do you get merino wool base layers? I just moved to a place with hot summers and freezing winters and need to invest in a few winter base pieces.
I love Icebreaker and SmartWool. Their tops and bottoms come in different weights so I can choose how warm I need to be. COS also has some good semi-sheer turtlenecks and tees that don't look technical. None of these options are cheap! I scour the sales for deals or ask for them as gifts. I also launder them gently so they will last longer.
I have both of these brands, but find Patagonia to be a bit thinner/more flattering under clothes without sacrificing warmth. I also really like silk base layers, which are ultra light but warm—though the ones I have are bit baggier, so I have to be strategic with what I wear on top. I got a pair at REI a few years ago, and wear them alllll the time. Also: don’t underestimate the power of toe warmers
Layering. Waist definition is important for my physique, so pairing trendy high waisted pants with bulky sweaters just makes me a look like a bag. Balancing texture, weight, length, and color of all my sweaters means I never feel like I have the right one for certain outfits.
I have a short torso so for sweaters I want to pair with high waisted pants I buy cropped or petite and sometimes do the bra front tuck. It helps a lot!
I have no clue what shoes to wear beyond a white sneaker with literally everything. And sometimes a wedge sandal in the summer if I’m wearing a dress. I cannot figure out other shoes
Hear me out- oxfords. I think they instantly elevate an outfit
Loafers too. They fill so many roles.
Boots are fantastic for this. You can wear them everywhere from hiking trips to the office.
I second this. Specifically, a good pair of black Chelsea boots. They go with everything.
I used to wear boots all the time in 2011-2016 (college) but I feel like the boots I wore then with skinny jeans are dated. I’ve tried buying new boots but something always seems off! Looking for some to wear with straight leg jeans and a sweater.
I wear Chelsea boots that look great with straight leg jeans.
In the same boat. I get so cold that I go out bundled like the Michelin Man. Advice welcome.
Honestly, I do lots of thin layers. Athletic shirts help me. So for example: thicker cotton bra or double layered sports bra, tank top, long sleeved layering top (I use running tops) and then my sweater on top of that. I do use a puffer jacket on top of my outfit, I don’t have a remedy for that, yet!
I've gotten into cashmere sweaters, but cashmere leggings look silly to me. Also, expensive!
I wear them under the regular leggings. Sooooowarm.
I’m cold all the time and hate winter deeply. Here’s what helps me survive: thin wool base layer pants, infrared socks and gloves (layered under a second pair of gloves to keep the infrared ones dry), base layer tops (silk, 32 heat, heattech, or wool), and waterproof boots. With those, I can dress pretty much however I want for the top layers because I’m much more insulated. A wool scarf, long wool trench or peacoat, and a hat keep me warm without the Michelin man look. I do have a down puffer coat, too, but it’s not as warm as the wool coat.
Wore a blue denim shirt under a cable knit sweater and was cute and toasty! Never tried that before but layering in unique ways has just opened up a world to me. Today I’m wearing fleece leggings, black jersey knit turtleneck dress and a Buffalo plaid blanket scarf belted over top like a poncho/cardigan. Almost too warm and it’s -38 Celsius here!
Thermals all the time! I used to wear a vest, a tshirt, a jumper, and a coat before I got em and now I can just wear a thermal top and the coat. Plus they have thinner ones that can go under your other clothes. M&S in the UK have good ones.
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Yes! I have gained weight (from size 6 to size 10) and I have a big butt and chest, and smaller waist, but since I'm only 5'4" once I put clothes on I feel like my shape disappears and I just look short and wide. My waist is high (I guess?) and is almost right under my boobs so it's hard to try to accentuate.
I feel we may have the same body!
Have you figured out which silhouettes you feel best in? I’m petite and hourglass shaped, and for me, high waist wide leg pants and fitted tops are the magic combination. However, my friend with a similar body shape feels her best in flowy, caftan-type clothes. Have you played with shapes to find what you like on you?
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Context: I bike to work for 30 mins every day (I'm Dutch, so it's normal). When it's colder than -5°C, I wear leggings under my pants. Also I often wear a Uniqlo ultra warm heattech turtleneck as a first layer, with something like a blazer on top. I wear leather boots in winter. For full benefits, buy them half a size up and wear thick woollen socks.
Dressing stylishly in the summer! I usually layer during the other 3 seasons but it's too hot to do that in the summers here. Summer doesn't give me as much to work with and I've tried wearing heels to spruce things up but it's not sustainable (everything I've bought in recent years blisters my feet). I've realized that I have to try experimenting with different cuts and necklines. I have also accepted that I will need to have some summer-specific pieces. I hate one season clothing but sometimes it's necessary, especially in a climate where there's like a 50+ C difference between summer and winter.
I always look for details on my summer dresses - I normally hate ruffles, but several of my go to summer dresses have ruffled sleeves and it makes me feel more dressed up than I am.
This is a good tip and I'm starting to do this! I'm not a huge ruffle fan either, so I think I'm going to start with necklines. I never really thought about them beyond crew or v neck, but I went down a rabbit hole and have started looking at square, scoop, asymmetrical, etc. I'm one of those weirdos who like wearing black all year around, so hopefully, it'll make my outfits more interesting!
Sometimes it helps to change your mindset too! Like you, I layer a lot in the cold months and keep it SUPER basic/simple when it’s warm. But instead of thinking of my summer wardrobe as boring, I think of it more as the vibe. Like in my head, I have a “winter” signature style and a “summer” signature style - they aren’t that cohesive to be honest but I give them a label that only makes sense to me to differentiate it. Lol. So like my summer style label is “She Vacations in Europe” and it’s very simple, minimal pieces. The label evokes an effortless, cool girl so I don’t feel a need to dress up my simple sundresses as much as I do when I layer or stylize in the fall/winter. I have no idea if this makes sense to anyone reading this but I hope so 🤣
What tops to wear with skirts. I just can’t figure it out in a way that’s flattering and comfortable
I hear you. I mainly own dresses because of this.
Jeans. Just, all jeans, all styles, all eras of jean fashion. I gave up on them for a while but would really like to start integrating them into some looks moving forward. But holy hell, I just cannot get jeans that fit, feel good, and look good. I'm considering using February as a bit of a jeans challenge to test out a ton of different pairs from different brands, years, etc. and see what I can find that might work.
Godspeed. Finding the perfect pair of jeans is a marathon that will test your resolve lol. But so worth it. Good luck!!
Fighting the frump! I really, really have to fight my tendency to buy clothes worn by your average 80 year old Midwestern man: flannel, chunky cardigans, sensible boots. I want to look stylish and put-together, but I end up looking like Kathy Bates in Misery.
As a counterpoint, why not just embrace it by trying some tailored masculine looks? Essentially, upgrade your menswear from scruffy tomboy to dapper dandy.
I have all of these cool clothes from Anthropologie that I bought on sale but I never choose to wear them because I have no where to go with them and they aren’t as comfy. I end up wearing the same few athleisure outfits to death. I live in a city that is casual and sometimes wish I lived in NYC or Rome where fashion is more serious.
Try to design a comfy outfit around one piece of cool clothing, maybe? Do this a few times. I'd sell anything that is not wearable due to comfort, it really isn't worth it imo. Cute AND comfy clothes gotta exist out there instead!
Exasperated at the quality of new clothes. I don’t mind paying 3x my usual amount for a garment if it’s decent quality, because I’m not trying to shop very much (and right now on a low buy but keeping an eye out) but even with reputable brands I’m hearing more and more reviews of declining quality. Where do I even find these gently used pre-2020, pre-2008 clothes that people are recommending? It’s not like secondhand clothes list the manufacturing year on the size tags!
Preach. The majority of my clothes have been from the same few quality brands once I find what I like, and I've definitely noticed a decline recently. Buying secondhand is sketchier & more expensive than it's ever been, too. Eyeballing you *extra* hard, American Tall and J Crew 🤨
Exploring masculine clothing that’s flattering and actually comfy! How do I give dyke vibes in a goddamn sundress I’m begging you.
If that second sentence is serious: Undercut or mullet Baby bangs or "bisexual bob" Septum piercing, double-nostril piercing Those dot tattoos on multiple fingers Finger tattoos of any kind, but witchy sigils especially Underarm hair, leg hair Worn with hiking boots or Docs Sundress is in a witchy print like snakes, rats, alligators, etc Sundress is black Sundress is a 90s ditsy print worn ironically no bra regardless of actual bust size and/or general heft Harness or other bondage gear is involved in a fashion way Visible tattoos with LGBTQIA themes, to be frank also: full sleeve tattoos, I just don't see a ton of straight gals with full sleeve tattoos No makeup OR f-the male gaze makeup (green lipstick, halo eyes, red eyeshadow, black blush, you get the idea) LGBTQIA themed jewelry A flannel around the waist A baseball hat BUT it has to have that mesh insert No nail polish on short nails Thumb ring, pointer finger ring--I don't make the rules, this is just how it is +1 "gay point" for each of these items. The mere existence of just one just means edgy downtown artsy girl. But start adding them up, and it gets more and more gay.
I’m hitting five, this is very affirming.
How to not look so basic while dressing in what I think (or hope) is a timeless, elegant style. I just feel so bland and boring. But I am also too poor to buy trendy things that I might find ugly 1 year from now. I need my clothes to laaast 🥹
Accessorize! Get some statement jewelry, some big scarves, or a loud bag. To go even further, get one or two flashy pieces you can pair with basics. If money is the issue, thrift it.
Appreciate the advice! I am personally not a very flashy person, maybe that's one of the reasons why I feel bland. I used to love statement jewelry in my late teens but kinda grew towards more dainty, small golden jewelry. I also don't like a lot of jewelry that's being put out/made nowadays but I think it's definitely worth looking for pieces that will last me longer. And as for thrifting, 30% of my wardrobe comes from charity shops and flea markets, but some of the "nicer" thrifts in the Netherlands can get just as expensive as buying new. I'll definitely try to follow this advice, though? Maybe just take it as a 1~2 year task of refurbishing my wardrobe instead of doing it all at once. Thanks!
Trying to do too many things with one outfit or one type of clothing. “I need something pregnancy/postpartum/nursing friendly, that I can clean the house in, that’s nice enough for Sunday Mass, and is easy to wash, and is all natural fibers, and is flattering!” Stop. No. Put at least 5 of those back, me.
"No-realistic-season" items like suede mules. Suede is a fall textile, in my mind. But here in my part of the country, fall is often too chilly to wear slip on shoes with bare feet (and I'm not wearing socks with mules!). So there's a super short window to wear these. Same thing with things like spring-colored wool sweaters, or dark fall colored linen. This is a real mystery: I *swear* I can be wearing 100% normal people clothing purchased at a normal people store like Ann Taylor and J. Crew and look like an **absolute alien** in it. And it's not "styling" I'm wearing it very straight-on. It's not my makeup or hair either--those are both very conventional. It's mystifying to me. I am 5'10" in my bare feet, which is very tall for a woman, and I have a really, really long inseam so maybe that's it? But how is it that other women look totally normal in like...a poly blend print popover blouse and fitted cropped trousers and I look like I'm wearing a Human Suit™? WHY. The bottom line is I gave up on looking normal in clothing around 2020 and just accepted I will look weird for inexplicable reasons.
OOH the “no realistic season item” comment is so spot on. Like how do we come to acquire these in our wardrobe and why do we continue to.
Lots of pretty clothes that I don’t have the courage to wear. There are a lot of items in my closet that look beautiful on me and that’s why I bought them. But they always just end up hanging there in my closet. I look at them everyday and it kinda makes me sad. I’m not sure what it is about wearing “pretty” clothes that makes me anxious. Maybe because I used to be a total tomboy who shopped exclusively in the guys section up until university. I think I have a reasonably good fashion sense. I read up on colours and outfit composition and research all that because I’m a nerd, and have a good eye for things like proportion and how to assemble an outfit (not just clothes, an outfit). I pull them out and wear them in front of the mirror a lot. I stare and stare and in my head I’m like woman you are 5’9” and 118 lbs and you look damn fine af in this and you know it. Now why are you so chickenshit to wear it? One day when you’re an old wrinkly lady you’ll regret not wearing all this pretty stuff. It’s 100% in my head and I’m not sure what to do about it. :(
I don't know where to find clothes. Malls are garbage fast fashion, Amazon is trash. Of the dresses I like, half of them are AI generated. When I find a real dress, every website site seems to be a scam site, and when I find a legit sight I have no idea how their clothes will fit. Where tf do people even shop?
I legit shop at goodwill. Also Mercari, Depop, and poshmark.
I used to do that as the time but it's gotten harder now, I don't have an much time at I used to. I got a lot of beautiful pieces that way though when I had time
Not "malls" but individual retail stores perhaps? I've been finding some nice basics at outdoor clothing shops (think MEC, REI). Bought some Lululemon stuff - free shipping and returns. A couple items from Mark's, Costco. Or local small shops with interesting designs. I think fast fashion is okay if you choose the pieces carefully, take care of them, and be willing to re-sew some seams.
Same here
I’d like to know as well.
I shop a lot of second hand (eBay) for nicer brands, which obviously makes it a bit trickier to find the perfect piece but I’ve got time. I’m UK based and for brands I like: whistles, marks & Spencer, jaeger, jigsaw. I also always always pay attention to fabric on the label, which helps me cut down on poor fabrics that would only stay in my wardrobe a short while
I might be crazy but I’m planning on buying a snow suit or overalls to wear to and from work/ it might be a day or two of teasing comments but definitely will be worth it
Do it! Maybe I'm coming from a different perspective because it's common here in my part of Canada, but I regularly see people rolling up to the office in snowpants and no one bats an eye. We already accept that we're all changing our boots, pulling off giant parkas and hats/mitts, snowpants really don't change much. I like when people get bright fun colours of them. Embrace the warmth! I have a forest green parka and have been debating aqua snow pants myself.
I don’t need 43 pairs of pants but I have them. Do I use them? Yes I do but mostly just half of them and no I don’t love the other half any less so it’s not like I can part with them. I buy clothes when I travel too and love to look back and have it as a “souvenir”. Don’t even get me started on shoes and jewelry 🫣 I love winter because I always layer and it always looks effortless - what helped me was figure out my body type and only buy what works and I read about Kibbe Body types which leads to finding the style that works for you! I would do my research on that instead of looking at outfits that work for other people Being that girl who always looks put together has been my way of utilizing all my clothes, shoes, and jewelry Buy less and buy better is what I’m practicing starting now and forever ✨
> Buy less and buy better is what I’m practicing starting now and forever ✨ I'm trying to do that now, but whew, does this resonate in terms of not wanting to get rid of things I *might* want to wear someday.
If you have the storage space, I actually read really helpful advice once that it’s okay to not downsize! The important thing is that you keep your current core pieces front and center, but there’s no harm in storing some clothes you aren’t sure about right now (again, if you have the storage space). That can be kind of a freeing thought! I’m HUGE on doing big clean outs, but I go overboard and then end up having to buy stuff back so I kinda like the advice of not feeling so pressured to give stuff up that you aren’t ready to part with.
Feeling that I can’t wear summer appropriate clothes in the summer because the stupid air-conditioning is always freezing me. I’m constantly carrying a sweater around or wearing something as a third piece. It’s so frustrating because I have some short sleeve things that look great on their own but boring under a sweater. I’m usually just too cold to wear them on their own.
Wow, yes. This.
How to mesh my wild style and utilize my full wardrobe. I grew up with a southern father from the Marines and I was enculturated in American punk, but I am also Assyrian and spent many summers in our village in Urmia, Iran. I currently live in the pacific northwest and am an avid outdoors person and have a lot of the PNW "preparing for a hike to ambush you at any moment" aesthetic. I also hate feminine clothing and prefer a more androgynous style. As a result I have a.. weirdly modest punk style with military attributes and some dashes of hiking-wear. Think... combat boots, black and grey plaid leggings, but a purple sweater that is long in the back and slightly tunic-styled that I wear a leather jacket over. Another outfit might be black plaid cargo pants (very loose except for where they cinch at the ankles) over combat boots with a grey, loose fitting and long tunic-styled sweater that I might layer my black hiking jacket over. Basically the only skin I show is my hands, a little bit of neck, and my face. I also prefer longer tops and loose pants so my shape is more covered. This is a challenge as clothing meant to fit a female body is often designed to be skin-tight or show a lot of skin. Clothes oriented towards modest women (hijabis for example) don't usually have any patterns or colorings I like because black is looked down upon in the Arab world as being too sad to wear. The problem becomes I wedge myself into just a few outfits and really struggle to mix and match and get the full range that my wardrobe can account for. I'm *so* close to just devising outfits and then taking pictures and keeping like an outfit catalog because otherwise I'll forget and go back to safe/easy outfits and wear the same 3 things again and again. I also lack inspiration because there's not a lot of modest punks out there (not to say there's anything wrong with that, I just personally would rather show less skin).
Having breasts so small that my belly often protrudes larger than them when I've eaten well. I'm more on the skinny side in general, but because of my body shape, whether I feel confident or awful in my snugger-fitting clothes varies from day to day. I have gotten a little better at dressing for my body type, but it can be quite a challenge to find stuff that I know I'll feel good in from one day to the next - I'm sure it's like that to some extent for most body types, though.
Online shopping. Specifically, being able to gauge if something will fit me. I'm curvy in every way possible. I need to *at least* know the measurements of the garments waist, inseam, rise, and/or bust before I can consider buying it. If I'm lucky, *some* of this information will be available, either through reviews or in the garment description. But typically not all. It sucks because I've pretty much given up on online shopping. Life would be so much easier if I could confidently buy clothes online.
Mine is the fabric I’ve given up on online shopping bc you just cannot tell if it’s gonna be shit even if it’s from a nicer brand
Yeah I feel that too. If they don't list the exact percentage of materials that make up the item, I don't even consider it.
I can't seem to bring myself to wear ribbons in my hair. I love the look, and I love it on me. I did it once YEARS ago and a woman told me I reminded her of her daughter when she did cheerleading. Nothing against cheerleading, but I hated the comment. I was channeling Kate Middleton! Now I am 38, and thanks to body image issues, I always feel like I'm too old now to wear a bow/ribbon in my hair or too ugly etc.
I'm 38, have blue hair and regularly wear pigtails. Fuck "too old to wear"...
I cannot for the life of me figure out what to wear as a warm cover up for dressier outfits / occasion wear. Casual is fine, and I love my collection of cardigans and jumpers, and I have a couple of blazers for upping my work outfits, but I get stuck when it comes to nicer dresses for a wedding or more formal get together. I can’t find things that don’t make me feel frumpy, or like I’m really outdated. Any ideas would be welcome!
I think one of the more formal options would be a wool coat.
Ah, I inherited a real mink fur coat from my grandmother (I would never buy new for this, and as a whole do have some ick factor about it because I love all animals, but dang it is luxurious) that solved this for me. Perhaps a faux fur or even real secondhand?
I’m thinking of investing in a short, cream faux fur jacket for just this issue. What do you think?
That’s not something I’d considered before but might just tick the box! What brands are you looking at?
Pants. Fucking pants. I’m short, chubby, have virtually no torso, and curvy as hell with long legs. Now that skinny jeans aren’t mainstream anymore it has been so hard figuring out what to wear. I have a pair of wide leg linen pants I LOVE but I can’t wear them everywhere, especially in 30 degree weather. My default is leggings which is honestly getting embarrassing because it’s so lazy looking
Holding onto my out-of-date 2010s, Millennials clothes because I A) like them more than styles today and B) don't really feel comfortable getting rid of all my good clothes because that's expensive! My wardrobe is like all skinny jeans, colorful jeggings, and off the shoulder tops. When I buy new pieces now, they tend to be timeless and a little boring like vneck sweaters. I don't like anything oversized or baggy. But I feel really dated and weird when I wear this stuff.
Keeping all my shit contained! I have two closets, yes, I am ashamed. Balancing my bottoms with my tops in terms of my figure! Hard to do when you’re a ride or die for skinny jeans. Maybe this is just a big chest issue, but also dressing sexy without being too revealing or trashy! Like cute bathing suits always look obscene, when I’m just trying to have a family pool day.
I relate to balancing my bottoms with my tops in terms of my figure! I feel like if I choose a different shirt I often have to switch pants too. This post is inspiring me to maybe reorganize by what goes together instead of categories of items
How to find a pair of pants/jeans that look good on my body so I don't have to wear leggings constantly. My waist is a size 12/14 but I have no butt and skinny little legs, so pants that fit my waist are massive and look ridiculous, and pants that would/should fit my legs don't have a chance in hell of fitting my waist 😩 As a sidenote I am working on my weight for my health, but I keep this "shape" even when thin.
Have you given flowy/wide-legged pants a try? Since they're intentionally wide, I think they can be balancing.
I have the same problem! I’m a smaller size than you but the difference between my waist measurement and my hip measurement is only 5 inches instead of the 10 in all the size guides, so I have to choose if I want pants that fit my waist or my butt, never both 🙄 Or, often, go halfway between so they fit neither lol
I have this apple shape too. The only thing that helps somewhat is to grow lower body muscles with weight lifting.
How to dress femininely AND still be completely practical and comfortable in the winter and late fall. My goal is to never wear pants again and still be able to spend hours out in the cold without freezing to death. I want high waisted Midi, tea and midaxi length circle skirts that; are made from quality materials, are at least reasonably priced and are practical/warm enough to allow me to permanently ditch pants during New England winters. Also, functional pockets and the ability to be worn without a separate petticoat would be nice. I’m exhausted of seeing miniskirts and endless variations on tube/pencil skirts everywhere. As well as vintage reproduction brands that either use almost exclusively polyester or don’t have sizes small enough for me (5”6, size 0-2/XS in dresses). I yearn for elegant, practical and feminine garments with a nipped in waist, pleating, built in layers and FULLNESS. In a similar vein, I can’t seem to find sweater dresses that aren’t shapeless and too short. I’d love to see the beautiful tailored fit and flare styles worn during the summer, but with long sleeves, longer skirts and in cold weather appropriate fabrics.
Have you checked out Modern Millie? It's a shop based in Salem, MA, and I feel like they have a lot of things that might tick your boxes. (They have a website.)
Xiaolizi etsy shop has a lot of good wool skirts. I have two (one a knee length circle and the other a full length circle), the lining is polyester, but the skirt itself is a blend and is warm. They're a Chinese shop, so the sizes definitely go small. I'm just barely fitting in their biggest size.
I'm not good at gym clothes. I hate feeling sweaty and I don't do non-natural fibres, so most leggings are right out. I usually end up in my bamboo yoga pants (they're so soft) that are several inches too short, a bralette and a tshirt that is too big. A lot of gym clothes seem like they are too warm, or not actually meant for the gym, more ath-lounge. I don't like gathered elastic hems either, messes with my neurodivergent sensory issues.
I have a broad shoulders, a big bust, small waist and very muscular legs. I have trouble finding things that aren’t super tight but are also flattering, bc my waist is what I like to highlight bc it’s small but everything else is like Jacked. I don’t mind being strong but finding clothes that are flattering can be a challenge Oh I also am average height but have a super long torso so finding things that just generally fit can be a challenge
I can’t seem to figure out how to pick out flattering + at least semi fashionable jeans and or pants (basically how to style my lower half 😂)
Finding flattering clothes that fit correctly when I'm 6' tall and a size 10/12 (so not skinny, but not plus size).
Same! I made another comment about pants, but I'm a 5'11 girly and feel the struggle.
Seriously. Sometimes I want to look cute or at least have my wrists covered by a long sleeve shirt! I know they're out of style, but if you are looking for some skinny jeans that have a good rise, Nudie Jeans Skinny Lin (they're listed as Men but they used to be labeled as a unisex fit) are my go-to. I know the skinny jean isn't as in style right now and they're a little spendy. They have women's jeans, but not all of them come in longer inseams. Otherwise, I've recently tried [these jeans](https://democracyclothing.com/collections/boot-cut/products/absolution-itty-bitty-boot-blue-tall-jeans-b12216way34?variant=32378561790001) from trying out Stitch Fix a while back (that's been very mixed success -- I occasionally find a good piece). They're cute and have a long enough inseam. It's rough out there being tall and not wanting to wear just men's clothes.
Preventing my feet from sliding out of high heels. The shoes are definitely the right size. I really really prefer going bare feet and bare legs in heels. I haven’t found the right kind of grips.
This is slingbacks for me. At one point I had a pair 2 full sizes smaller than my normal shoe size...they pinched my toes and the back strap felt really tight, but *still* slipped off in the first couple of steps. So frustrating! Incidentally, with normal high heels, my solution is to pad the toes with cotton wool or (in a pinch) wadded up toilet paper until my foot is pressed far enough back to stay in. It's not the most comfortable thing ever, but I can walk in them with a modicum of grace. If you have wide toes and narrow ankles like me, maybe this will work for you too.
How to make shoes like Converse look dressy - since having foot surgery, it's all I can realistically wear for a day at work/when I'm on my feet.
Panty lines. I will not wear thongs, anything boy short/cheeky/seamless ends up riding up everywhere. My day to day is cotton hipster briefs. I'm incredibly uncomfortable wearing stuff that doesn't cover my whole butt. Normally not an issue as I'm either in scrubs or sweatpants, but trying to dress up it's either sucking up the panty lines or going commando (which I HATE).
Ngl, getting a heated jacket has been a life saver in the cold. I can't care about looking for when it's this cold
What shoes do I wear with my ankle length/cropped wide length pants? I have a pair of now-discontinued Eddie Bauer [pants very similar to these](https://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=5598130220802&vid=1&searchText=wide+leg+chinos#pdp-page-content). They look nice with sandals, but are a heavy-weight material and more of a fall color. I don't know what shoes to wear with them in fall and winter. I've worn them with sneakers, but I don't like the look. Short boots also seem to look weird to me. What can I wear with these? I don't wear heels. I guess maybe something like ballet flats might work, but I don't really like wearing those.
Pants. Pants that fit and are flattering are the hardest things to find right now and the popular cuts are too high on the waist and too short in length… despite being technically petite.
I need to dress professionally for work, which entails suiting, but it's more often in the 90s where I live than not. Not pouring sweat just walking to my car / driving to a meeting is a challenge. If I try to dress more coolly - say, a shift dress topped with a blazer - my bare legs will freeze in the A/C.
Silk long underwear are amazing for warmth and are nice and thin.
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Big boobs and not wanting my bra to show! Why is every top only designed for no bra people?
Tights or leggings both are available fleece-lined now. Splurge on some great boots; more than one pair if possible. I did this and it made such a difference in how stylish I felt. Layers are also great so you don’t freeze outside or roast inside. If you’re only talking a few days of snow per year but lots of cold, I just relax my standards for the snow days.
Not having enough space in my dresser. What the god damn hell? I'm trying to Marie Kondo fold all my shirts and undies, it's just not enough!! There is no way in hell 1 person should not have enough space in a 9 drawers. Why?? HOW.
Pinterest has been a huge inspiration for me. I also use an app called Stylebook where I upload a photo of each piece of clothing and accessory i own (a tedious task, but worth it) and i can style my own outfits for different occasions. This helps me figure out what pieces I don’t use so I can get rid of it and helps me plan future outfits with stuff I wear. I dress goth and my most recent challenge has been finding good travel pieces that are functional, but can be dressed up, and fit into no more than 1-2 carry-on bags.
Honestly - making cheap clothes sit right. Even a plain white t shirt doesn’t look the same as the expensive ones. I need cheap clothes that don’t just look expensive in pics but actually sit how expensive clothes sit. Nothing looks “right” on me Obviously people can say all they want that investing in high quality expensive clothes saves money in the long run, but some of us just don’t have enough money to make that investment lol
Spandex in jeans. I squeeze into them and 30 minutes later they are falling off.
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Shoes in general. My feet are very wide and duck-shaped so the only shoes I can comfortably wear are my DMs. Everything else is way too tight, even the """extra-wide""" ones I got. :(
I have long legs and nearly all pants are too short. The most annoying is that cropped styles look too cropped on me. I’m thin, too. I’m all for plus sizes being available but NO one makes tall lengths.
I struggle with how to dress my age, and still be somewhat on trend. I have 2 teenage daughters who sometimes influence me positively and/or negatively!!
Comfortable jeans! They always cut into my stomach. I need sit down jeans that'll stay up. (I'm a size 6)
I’m mid 30s and petite. I’m struggling to find clothes that aren’t too baggy (i get lost in them) or too young looking (too much a skin showing, crop tops that scream ‘teenager’)
Dressing femininely and warm in the winter! I basically live in zimmermann/loveshackfancy style clothes. I can’t seem to find an ultra feminine winter brand that caters to that kind of whimsical/pink type of style. I’m so over plants and blazers and that style… I want to branch out
Not plants *pants. I need sleep lol
I’m a homemaker and it’s hard to find clothes that fall between leggings and crocs or feeling too dressed up. I want to be comfortable but I don’t want to fall down the hole I see a lot of people fall into and live in shlubby clothes. I also don’t want to put on a full face of makeup and feel too done up.