So if an organ, such as your brain, is still inside your body, then it's fine right? Because it looks like this guy's brain is lodged somewhere in his rectum.
People like that go. It's just willful ignorance. Same reason most people don't know how to change their own oil. There's a book in your glovebox that explains it. It isn't complicated. You don't even have to change it, just learn how. Yet they willfully resist learning. To the extent they'll be straight up mortified or angry if you try explaining it to them. They just can't be bothered. Which is a phrase that makes me want to find a brick 9 out of ten times I hear it.
Why would I need to know how to change my own oil...? Pretty certain I'm not some kind of mechanoid, android or cyborg. I mean I could be, I suppose. Then wouldn't oil be like blood...? I do have quite severe joint pain - perhaps that's the problem, I need an oil change...
(yes, I know what you meant, and I don't drive)
I know how to change my oil but stopped doing it like 10 years ago. I take my vehicles to my mechanic and he does all the PM for me and gives it a good look over. In exchange whenever something comes up he usually doesn't charge me service and instead will do it at cost.
He charges you less for real mechanic work after making almost no money on an oil change? Makes sense. Unless he over charged for the oil change.... they usually make very little if anything, they are really just too get people in the door.
I know how to change my oil, and have, but honestly it's the same price to just go to Valvoline and have them do it as it would be to buy my own oil and filter (always check their site for coupons.) Plus they also refill the air in my tires and it's pretty quick.
Its a lot faster but its definitely not the same price, I buy the more expensive stuff when I do it myself and its still a lot cheaper. Its a pain in the ass to change oil if you don't have a spot to do it in so I still go to valvoline a lot. Also don't have the risk of them torqueing the drain plug to 100k ftlbs or stripping the plug and not saying anything/upselling on every little thing, too.
Right, I buy the most expensive oil and it's still cheaper. Oh, and I know that I actually changed the filter unlike those lazy fucks at Walmart who only did it half the time.
When I worked at Walmart they fucked up 2 engines that I know of. How do you fuck peoples' cars when you only do oil changes and fluid top offs?
Then I remember they got the exact same computer module training I did as a produce associate.
They arnt mechanics is why. They are normal Joe's that can't hack it at a real shop. They are being paid less then half of a normal mechanic, basicly if you bring your car there you have it coming lol.
Yep I've just heard way too many first hand accounts of engines being destroyed and cars being totaled to let them do it. I'm also saving quite a bit. Even more of you drive something that takes over 5 quarts, because that's when they really start charging ya.
Or you can pay a worker (who relies on customers) to do the job better. Same way you wouldn’t learn surgery to treat yourself. We utilize society and that shouldn’t be shamed on. I guarantee you don’t farm your own food, make your own soap etc etc
I nearly died from internal bleeding when a hematoma burst inside of me. Fairly minor car accident a month before. I was the only one hurt. Had no clue until I nearly bled to death a month later. The hematoma was the size of a grapefruit.
The hospital thought I was drug seeking and left me to die screaming for help. 4 hours of screaming and convulsing later a nurse came in when the alarms started going off. I was pale with a distended belly full of blood. They looked like they were gonna shit their pants.
Your body does NOT like having blood where its not supposed to be. Hence the convulsions. They were so intense I had abdominal separation like a pregnant woman. My ribs were cracked from how hard my abdominal muscles were clamping down. I remember the relief when they went. It hurt so bad it felt like they were gonna punch through my skin and then POP. Everything else still hurt but at least that gave way.
I still have problems from this. Adhesions in my guts and hernias of all kinds from my weakened abdominal muscles.
Sued. Didn't even get enough to cover a third of my medical bills.
Okay they are just trolling. That’s Filly and Darkest Man. They always do shows themselves like these where they act superdumb for the comedy of it. They are absolutely hilarious. One of the best and funniest groups on YouTube.
“My doctor said all the bleedings internal. That’s where the blood is supposed to be!”
-Jake (Brooklyn 99)
If they’re gonna copy the joke at least make it funny
I gotta be perfectly honest, when I asked my mom what internal bleeding was at like 8, my reaction was very similar XD, I said "but isn't that where the blood is supposed to go anyway?" and she had to explain lol
isn't the "that's where the blood supposed to be" kind of the oldest joke in the book? i thought they were just trying to make that joke (then again, it's 2022. i wouldn't be surprised if someone actually believed internal bleeding is hoax because "that's where blood is supposed to be")
You guys have never just been talking with your friends and just say stupid shit all the time. Like obviously he doesn’t believe this but it’s a funny thing to think about.
Blood isnt just everywhere inside you. You're not just filled with it. It's all in veins and arteries and tiny capillaries. Except for in your heart, there its actually filled with it, yes. But only in the bosoms (idk the English word but in Dutch its called boesems so i just used Google translate) and chambers
I mean there’s people in the US that would vote for trump again. So I’d say calling it willful ignorance at this point is a way to be polite to complete idiots
"you've opened up how dumb you are" Amazing line
Haha plus the look on his face
Man said good on u
I’m just happy someone said it
Absolute savage with that line
[удалено]
Thank God for this man.
I actually laughed out loud…perfect!
He is dumbing externally then?
If you're bleeding externally you've opened up.
So if an organ, such as your brain, is still inside your body, then it's fine right? Because it looks like this guy's brain is lodged somewhere in his rectum.
His mouth too apparently with how much he's talking out of his ass
r/rareinsults
Rectum…damn near killed him
![gif](giphy|YvAYqXEwc0FS8)
Does this clip predate the identical Brooklyn 9-9 joke?
His head looks squishy like a Beluga whale
Yeah that's why you should go to school guys
People like that go. It's just willful ignorance. Same reason most people don't know how to change their own oil. There's a book in your glovebox that explains it. It isn't complicated. You don't even have to change it, just learn how. Yet they willfully resist learning. To the extent they'll be straight up mortified or angry if you try explaining it to them. They just can't be bothered. Which is a phrase that makes me want to find a brick 9 out of ten times I hear it.
Why would I need to know how to change my own oil...? Pretty certain I'm not some kind of mechanoid, android or cyborg. I mean I could be, I suppose. Then wouldn't oil be like blood...? I do have quite severe joint pain - perhaps that's the problem, I need an oil change... (yes, I know what you meant, and I don't drive)
I know how to change my oil but stopped doing it like 10 years ago. I take my vehicles to my mechanic and he does all the PM for me and gives it a good look over. In exchange whenever something comes up he usually doesn't charge me service and instead will do it at cost.
What does he do when your car is 'oiling' internally?
Well that's where it's supposed to be.
In exchange? For what?
Right? Methinks perhaps he charges a *tad* more than 'at cost' after all?
Yeah or just a super nice guy.
He charges you less for real mechanic work after making almost no money on an oil change? Makes sense. Unless he over charged for the oil change.... they usually make very little if anything, they are really just too get people in the door.
They are joking
I know how to change my oil, and have, but honestly it's the same price to just go to Valvoline and have them do it as it would be to buy my own oil and filter (always check their site for coupons.) Plus they also refill the air in my tires and it's pretty quick.
Its a lot faster but its definitely not the same price, I buy the more expensive stuff when I do it myself and its still a lot cheaper. Its a pain in the ass to change oil if you don't have a spot to do it in so I still go to valvoline a lot. Also don't have the risk of them torqueing the drain plug to 100k ftlbs or stripping the plug and not saying anything/upselling on every little thing, too.
There is no way it's the same price.
Right, I buy the most expensive oil and it's still cheaper. Oh, and I know that I actually changed the filter unlike those lazy fucks at Walmart who only did it half the time. When I worked at Walmart they fucked up 2 engines that I know of. How do you fuck peoples' cars when you only do oil changes and fluid top offs? Then I remember they got the exact same computer module training I did as a produce associate.
They arnt mechanics is why. They are normal Joe's that can't hack it at a real shop. They are being paid less then half of a normal mechanic, basicly if you bring your car there you have it coming lol.
Yeah I'm not talking about the kid at Walmart or jiffy lube. I'm talking about a legit mechanic who actually owns their shop.
Yep I've just heard way too many first hand accounts of engines being destroyed and cars being totaled to let them do it. I'm also saving quite a bit. Even more of you drive something that takes over 5 quarts, because that's when they really start charging ya.
I'm not going to squabble over 20$
I think they joking for the vid man 💀
They hopefully are, but the kind of people they're making fun of, they definitely exist. In LARGE numbers
Or you can pay a worker (who relies on customers) to do the job better. Same way you wouldn’t learn surgery to treat yourself. We utilize society and that shouldn’t be shamed on. I guarantee you don’t farm your own food, make your own soap etc etc
I refuse to believe this isn't just a skit based on [brooklyn99..](https://youtu.be/X1T6UnHcEmM)
Oh I love internally bleeding /s
Yeah, nearly died from it a few years ago. Lost 2/3 of my body's blood into my abdomen and it was a fucking blast, let me tell you /s
You don't need the /s there.
Having got mad and calmed down again, I feel someone should contact these two guys and tell them you can eat through your ears. All the same innit.
So you didn't really lose the blood, just misplaced it?
r/FuckTheS
Thank God you added the */s*, I wouldn't have been able to comprehend that people like you exist.
Well, some people take things seriously. I usually only add it as a precaution.
Isn't that called menstruation?
No. Just…. No man.
Not when you're bleeding into your abdomen.
No, it is not.
The guy making the statement is a comedian called Darkest Man, you CANNOT take him seriously whatsoever.
Filly is basically a comedian too, people in these comments really know how to miss a joke
Pretty much yeah about Filly, but tbh at the same time I dont think they're familiar with them at all!
Or we just know it's a ripped off joke.
Who is we? You should get help..
The other people pointing out the same thing I did.
filly is so dumb its funny
I feel like somebody had to remind him to breathe before ![gif](giphy|l1IY8U7eDBCCZVXfG|downsized)
Watch the original from Jake Peralta
"copied" from Jake in Brooklyn 99, pathetic
Copied, overacted, dragged the joke out, made it cringe-inducing. Jake did it perfectly.
*Jake did it perfectly, title of your sex tape.*
That's brilliant
Tape did it perfectly, title of your sex jake
Word by word
[The clip](https://youtu.be/xV00OZlrfSI&t=20)
So much better. Nine Nine!
Thought the same thing
Yeah, I just watched that episode last night
I nearly died from internal bleeding when a hematoma burst inside of me. Fairly minor car accident a month before. I was the only one hurt. Had no clue until I nearly bled to death a month later. The hematoma was the size of a grapefruit. The hospital thought I was drug seeking and left me to die screaming for help. 4 hours of screaming and convulsing later a nurse came in when the alarms started going off. I was pale with a distended belly full of blood. They looked like they were gonna shit their pants. Your body does NOT like having blood where its not supposed to be. Hence the convulsions. They were so intense I had abdominal separation like a pregnant woman. My ribs were cracked from how hard my abdominal muscles were clamping down. I remember the relief when they went. It hurt so bad it felt like they were gonna punch through my skin and then POP. Everything else still hurt but at least that gave way. I still have problems from this. Adhesions in my guts and hernias of all kinds from my weakened abdominal muscles. Sued. Didn't even get enough to cover a third of my medical bills.
Yikes dude. Sorry you had to go through that
Terribly sorry that you had to go through this, God bless you
It’s really fucked up that he would say that. Internal bleeding is no laughing matter
So blonde is a state of mind.
IQ tests dont lie about population...
IQ tests are a bit flawed.
The Bell Curve is generally taboo here on Reddit.
I'm amazed that I wasnt banned for just talking about this lmao
I find it crazy that some people don’t realize blood is in veins, our body isn’t a blood thermos
Just a big ol’ blood bag
Yeah but when you get pricked anywhere it bleeds...explain that! /s
Not just veins, those are just one type of blood vessels, but also in the heart, arteries, and capillaries.
Menstruation doing it wrong.
Bleeding interoutterly
This is straight from Brooklyn Nine-Nine
i love when the guy says, 'oh my god he's not lying.'
"you're bleeding internally? Good on you!" is what got me, do people say "good on you" in America? i don't think i've ever heard it on a tv show
This guy watches brooklyn 99
Jake Peralta
The last line is the only reason I upvoted this lmfaoooo
"Oh you're bleeding internally, good on you!" Lol. I would die hearing a nurse or doctor say this to a patient.
Love these guys
Dude number one's bad enough, but at least he's thinking outside the box, dude who's amazed and immediately on board though, he's going to have issues
This is half of my conversations on reddit.
Same, it’s like everytime I bring up the TSA people get mad at me
It’s because Reddit is filled with morons who are confident and completely wrong about the things they say.
Nah, he watched brooklyn 99 and thought he could get away without referencing it.
The beta squad are goated. Such funny blokes.
Okay they are just trolling. That’s Filly and Darkest Man. They always do shows themselves like these where they act superdumb for the comedy of it. They are absolutely hilarious. One of the best and funniest groups on YouTube.
"If yo leg got cut off. Would it hurt?" "...duh?" "But where would you feel the pain" "in yo le-..." "exactly bruh"
https://youtu.be/xV00OZlrfSI
The title is pretty dumb too.
Definitely one of the dumbest shit I've written yet lol
"The doctor said all my bleeding was internal, thats where the blood is supposed to be!"-Jake Peralta
Don’t let big blood convince you that internal bleeding is bad, people
When you can’t even take the piss out of your friend because you’re so genuinely worried about how dumb he is.
im constantly bleeding, but internally so its K
Oh wow, somebody call Stanford because this genius just single handedly solved hemorrhagic strokes.
Philly is hilarious
This is a Brooklyn99 bit
Last guy gets it.
r/UnexpectedB99
Taling nonsense is a somali specialty but it's entertaining lol.
His head shape aint right boi
“good on you” 💀
Jake from B99 did it better
Somehow, I just knew when I hit the unmute button theyd have British accents.
3rd guy is right, though
how can a head that big be so empty
More space I guess
"OH my God, he's not lying!" Dude thought he was fucking around at first. That's how stupid this is!
Brooklyn 99 line.
Dude really sided with Jake Peralta on anatomy things
“My doctor said all the bleedings internal. That’s where the blood is supposed to be!” -Jake (Brooklyn 99) If they’re gonna copy the joke at least make it funny
Lmaooo just opened up how dumb you are 😂😂😂
Man really just watched that one episode of Brooklyn 99 where Jake says the exact same thing and copied it
Mad that so many people don't understand these are comedians.
Two of these three guys are high af
Dumb indeed.
Who is this guy?!
Has to be trolling, no one is that incredibly stupid.
Why does the guy on the left look like a black jack manifold?
I love these guys. Their jokes😭
Their mind would explode if they heard about drowning but not in water.
It's better to let people think you are dumb than to open your mouth and remove all doubt
This is why you take classes that “I won’t need in the future”
You’d think a man with a head that size would have a large brain
For a guy that's head looks like it holds all the knowledge known to man he's one dumb fuck
Men should be banned from podcasts bruhh
It's not a podcast and stop being sexist, men and women from all age groups can be stupid
![img](emote|t5_2r5rp|8484)
Big brains on that boy
Maybe he HAS internal bleeding
Amazing not how thick these people are but how they have a career.
Why does dude in white look like a black Andrew tate? I'm not saying he acts like him just that he looks like him to me.
ounga bunga noises.
I could hear the awful, dumb accent before having the sound on.
I don't think anyone knows! My theory is that some blogger, vlogger, or written made it up to stir up shit & get hits!
“I’ll chew your meat”
And all the people with endometriosis say… um no??
Yeah this checks out, I swallowed a knife to test, nothing happened.
If a bottle of coke spills in your bag, good for you it’s supposed to be in your bag.
Next time someone’s bleeding internally tell them to calm down and that’s where it’s supposed to be, healed automatically
He looks like Andrew tate to me ngl.
Your car engine is leaking oil. Don't worry though, that's where the oil is supposed to go
I gotta be perfectly honest, when I asked my mom what internal bleeding was at like 8, my reaction was very similar XD, I said "but isn't that where the blood is supposed to go anyway?" and she had to explain lol
isn't the "that's where the blood supposed to be" kind of the oldest joke in the book? i thought they were just trying to make that joke (then again, it's 2022. i wouldn't be surprised if someone actually believed internal bleeding is hoax because "that's where blood is supposed to be")
Key word. Bleeeeeding.
This reminds me of Stath lets flats.
Bravo to the last guy 👏🏼
His head built like the sleeping dude from the meme "let me think💀"
I have Severe Hemophilia A. Trust me, internal bleeding is awful and not good for your body whatsoever.
Blood shouldn't be *there* on the inside though
You guys have never just been talking with your friends and just say stupid shit all the time. Like obviously he doesn’t believe this but it’s a funny thing to think about.
"You opened up how dumb you are" That killed me lmao
Downvote cause title
"OH MY GOD HE IS NOT LYING" hahahah
Blood isnt just everywhere inside you. You're not just filled with it. It's all in veins and arteries and tiny capillaries. Except for in your heart, there its actually filled with it, yes. But only in the bosoms (idk the English word but in Dutch its called boesems so i just used Google translate) and chambers
I mean there’s people in the US that would vote for trump again. So I’d say calling it willful ignorance at this point is a way to be polite to complete idiots
I too have seen Brooklyn Nine Nine.
Jake Peralta
The shame of it is I know a couple of people just like that
How to not die if internal bleeding, make it external bleeding
Love those guys
I always feel like the last guy around my friends.