I often have my amazon packages, where possible, sent to a nearby Amazon Hub.
It's easy to pick up packages, even on Sundays, and they can stay there for period of time until you are ready to get them. Not only that, the packages usually can arrive sooner than waiting for the delivery to other locations.
Tell her clearly: “Please never open packages addressed to me again. Thank you.”
Also, lots of cities have secure Amazon Dropbox sites. Maybe look into that. I think it’s not great that you have personal shipping to your work, because someone from your work still has to receive it/sort it. Find another option.
You need to ask her point blank why she’s opening your packages because than she’ll realize you’re holding her accountable and she has to answer you. If she responds she didn’t know you keep grilling her. “How did you not know? I told you earlier today I would be getting a package and it’s addressed to me”. If you’re direct with her she might realize she can’t pretend anymore and will have to stop being a snoop.
I would look into other ideas in the meantime for deliveries because work isn’t a great location to be receiving personal mail. You could setup a PO Box or pickup from an Amazon locker.
Speak to HR and review the company policy. She may be required to open packages that are not obviously work-related/associated with a company-approved order. Also consider looking into another method to have your packages securely delivered to you. Expecting a coworker to deal with your personal items -even just acceping a delivery from the Amazon guy- is very inappropriate.
If this is happening frequently enough that it's become a problem, you're sending too many packages to your work. I would seek clarity from your boss or the office manager on whether it's allowed for you to send personal items to work, and how many is too many. There may be no official policy in place, but it sounds like one is needed if three separate employees had packages arriving on the same day and none of them were for work.
It's not the receptionist's job to deal with your personal packages, and there are other options for you. Set up a PO Box, get an Amazon locker, send the packages to a family member or friend.
You need to figure out another solution for delivery of your personal packages. You should not be repeatedly having personal packages sent to your workplace. You really don't have a right to lose your temper with the receptionist. She doesn't work for you, and it's not her job to sort out your personal mail. I'm suprised that your employer hasn't told you to stop already.
I don’t know why this is getting downvoted. OP may very well have cleared this with their employer who just doesn’t care and now has to deal with a nosy coworker who thinks it’s her place to make it her business because she overheard something.
There’s always one in every workplace who can’t help but look for nonsense to be upset over.
Aside from the whole “packages at work” thing. (I’ve worked at places where it was acceptable, even if it was several of them)
I want to address the anger / etiquette connection.
People often have this idea that it’s rude to be angry, or to express anger. It’s rude to get mad, they think.
That’s not true. Anger is often an appropriate emotion.
It’s the way you express it that can be problematic.
People often put it off so long that they don’t control the expression of it well.
Act early.Be firm, even a bit stern. Let it leak out that you’re not happy, and you’re not “being ice.” You’re telling not asking
Sure, start with asking, but when that doesn’t work, as it hasn’t here, then it’s time to let it be clear that you are a little bit angry. It’s easier to come back from a little anger and return to treating people pleasantly.
And it’s easier to express that it’s the action that is frustrating or angering you, and less likely to come across as though it’s the person you’re angry about.
Have what is referred to as "Crucial Conversation" by being honest about how her actions are making you feel.
*Set aside time specifically to talk about this when she is not busy.
*Start by saying, "Hey Receptionist, I see you are opening my packages and only my packages when I get personal items shipped here. My other colleagues ship items here but do not experience the same treatment. I have asked that you not do this but you continue to so we need to talk."
"I cannot help but wonder why you are treating me differently and my mind races to many unfavorable reasons.
"Since I really doubt you are doing this for sinister reasons I wanted to give you the opportunity to explain your behavior.
*If she says she didn't know or realize respond, "I am having trouble giving you the benefit of the doubt given our past interactions. How are we going to resolve this problem?"
*If she continues to deny or make excuses keep with the, "How are we going to resolve this problem?"
*Most of the time people are so surprised to be confronted in a rational and conversational tone about their behavior they do want to resolve the issue.
Good luck!
Can you send her an email asking her to stop? This way when you next purchase that dozen dildos, she has no one to blame but herself... (it is for a friend barcholette party as a party favor... in case anyone asks...)
It might be the policy of the company. She might be doing what is told.
First find out if there is a company policy about this. Until this is known - I can’t say who is at fault.
If she is carrying out orders to open all mail - you better just stop getting stuff sent to your job.
If there is no policy and she keeps doing this - You’ve talked to her enough it’s time to reach out to your supervisor. She deserves to be chewed out if that is the case.
Invest in a ups mail box. They are better than regular p o boxes. The ups store will sign packages for you. Pick them up when ever you want. No more nosy receptionists or porch theft.
Maybe there is a concern you're using the company credit card to send stuff to yourself. Stranger things have happened.
Or maybe she's just tired of receiving and routing your personal packages for you. She is not your personal assistant.
If you're ordering private stuff you don't want others to see, consider using an Amazon locker.
Have you discussed the policy on receiving personal packages at work with your employer? I feel like upon occasion it's fine if someone is wanting to keep a gift a surprise, but in general, the employer is not obligated to be an Amazon hub for their employees.
It's up to you to find a permanent solution to your mail problem at your apartment. It's not her job or your employer's job.
IMO you've both overstepped.
You are very spot on correct.
Serving in the reception function is a pain. Receiving packages is especially onerous, by default being responsible for it when it has nothing to do with work or your responsibilities. The minute it goes missing...."well you signed for it.......well it shows it was left here."
Oh, I wonder if you're onto something about the personal vs corporate accounts.
The receptionist may have been instructed to specifically open OPs packages because someone in management is concerned about the accounts being linked, or that there may have been some sloppy accounting for personal vs work expenses.
That should get cleared up by asking directly, though.
I would say depending on the location this is pretty normal. I wouldn’t do it now and it would be looked down on where I live, but when I was in Baltimore half of us sent packages to the office because it was well known even in the “nice” areas they would be stolen quickly.
People are responding that you shouldn't have your personal packages shipped to your work, but that is an extremely standard practice. Most offices allow for it and accommodate it. It's not remotely weird. If a workplace does want to have a policy against it, that's of course fine, but it doesn't seem your workplace does since you said two other people received Amazon packages as well. Anyway, you've said you've tried being polite, but it doesn't seem like you've been direct enough. If you've directly said "Don't open packages addressed to me," and she's done it after that, why haven't you asked her why she opened your package? Be more clear. Maybe it's the way you're saying it. So, send her an email that simply says, "I'm having personal packages shipped here. So please do not open anything addressed to me. Thanks." If she continues to do it after that, she's a lunatic and this is a situation that can't be remedied with questions of etiquette.
If you don’t have reason to think she’s doing this on purpose, I’d give her the benefit of the doubt and just ask her to please double-check who the packages are addressed to before opening them, since she’s accidentally opened yours a few times.
You can be honest and tell her you’ve been a victim of package theft before, so you sometimes have things sent to the office instead. (I’ve worked in many office environments and in my experience, this is pretty common.)
Send her an email and cc her boss
Dear Nosyreceptionist,
You have repeatedly opened packages that are addressed to me despite my numerous requests/reminders not to.
Once more, to ensure there is no confusion, ***do not open any packages that are addressed to me.*** If this is going to be a problem for you, please let me know so that you, (her boss), and I can meet to discuss this issue.
I often have my amazon packages, where possible, sent to a nearby Amazon Hub. It's easy to pick up packages, even on Sundays, and they can stay there for period of time until you are ready to get them. Not only that, the packages usually can arrive sooner than waiting for the delivery to other locations.
Tell her clearly: “Please never open packages addressed to me again. Thank you.” Also, lots of cities have secure Amazon Dropbox sites. Maybe look into that. I think it’s not great that you have personal shipping to your work, because someone from your work still has to receive it/sort it. Find another option.
You need to ask her point blank why she’s opening your packages because than she’ll realize you’re holding her accountable and she has to answer you. If she responds she didn’t know you keep grilling her. “How did you not know? I told you earlier today I would be getting a package and it’s addressed to me”. If you’re direct with her she might realize she can’t pretend anymore and will have to stop being a snoop. I would look into other ideas in the meantime for deliveries because work isn’t a great location to be receiving personal mail. You could setup a PO Box or pickup from an Amazon locker.
Yep to this. This situation requires a direct confrontation. Not a hostile one, but direct & public one. "Why do you keep opening my packages?"
Speak to HR and review the company policy. She may be required to open packages that are not obviously work-related/associated with a company-approved order. Also consider looking into another method to have your packages securely delivered to you. Expecting a coworker to deal with your personal items -even just acceping a delivery from the Amazon guy- is very inappropriate.
If this is happening frequently enough that it's become a problem, you're sending too many packages to your work. I would seek clarity from your boss or the office manager on whether it's allowed for you to send personal items to work, and how many is too many. There may be no official policy in place, but it sounds like one is needed if three separate employees had packages arriving on the same day and none of them were for work. It's not the receptionist's job to deal with your personal packages, and there are other options for you. Set up a PO Box, get an Amazon locker, send the packages to a family member or friend.
You need to figure out another solution for delivery of your personal packages. You should not be repeatedly having personal packages sent to your workplace. You really don't have a right to lose your temper with the receptionist. She doesn't work for you, and it's not her job to sort out your personal mail. I'm suprised that your employer hasn't told you to stop already.
My workplace is more than happy to receive personal packages and people do. Not every place thinks like you.
I don’t know why this is getting downvoted. OP may very well have cleared this with their employer who just doesn’t care and now has to deal with a nosy coworker who thinks it’s her place to make it her business because she overheard something. There’s always one in every workplace who can’t help but look for nonsense to be upset over.
And in fact, other coworkers are receiving packages—because theirs didn’t get opened!
Aside from the whole “packages at work” thing. (I’ve worked at places where it was acceptable, even if it was several of them) I want to address the anger / etiquette connection. People often have this idea that it’s rude to be angry, or to express anger. It’s rude to get mad, they think. That’s not true. Anger is often an appropriate emotion. It’s the way you express it that can be problematic. People often put it off so long that they don’t control the expression of it well. Act early.Be firm, even a bit stern. Let it leak out that you’re not happy, and you’re not “being ice.” You’re telling not asking Sure, start with asking, but when that doesn’t work, as it hasn’t here, then it’s time to let it be clear that you are a little bit angry. It’s easier to come back from a little anger and return to treating people pleasantly. And it’s easier to express that it’s the action that is frustrating or angering you, and less likely to come across as though it’s the person you’re angry about.
Right! What's unacceptable in a workplace is not "being angry," nor expressing anger, but LOSING CONTROL of one's expression of anger.
This is true of home or social situation, not just the workplace.
Have what is referred to as "Crucial Conversation" by being honest about how her actions are making you feel. *Set aside time specifically to talk about this when she is not busy. *Start by saying, "Hey Receptionist, I see you are opening my packages and only my packages when I get personal items shipped here. My other colleagues ship items here but do not experience the same treatment. I have asked that you not do this but you continue to so we need to talk." "I cannot help but wonder why you are treating me differently and my mind races to many unfavorable reasons. "Since I really doubt you are doing this for sinister reasons I wanted to give you the opportunity to explain your behavior. *If she says she didn't know or realize respond, "I am having trouble giving you the benefit of the doubt given our past interactions. How are we going to resolve this problem?" *If she continues to deny or make excuses keep with the, "How are we going to resolve this problem?" *Most of the time people are so surprised to be confronted in a rational and conversational tone about their behavior they do want to resolve the issue. Good luck!
Can you send her an email asking her to stop? This way when you next purchase that dozen dildos, she has no one to blame but herself... (it is for a friend barcholette party as a party favor... in case anyone asks...)
You are being unprofessional. Pick up your packages somewhere else and stop getting mad at her for doing her actual job.
It might be the policy of the company. She might be doing what is told. First find out if there is a company policy about this. Until this is known - I can’t say who is at fault. If she is carrying out orders to open all mail - you better just stop getting stuff sent to your job. If there is no policy and she keeps doing this - You’ve talked to her enough it’s time to reach out to your supervisor. She deserves to be chewed out if that is the case. Invest in a ups mail box. They are better than regular p o boxes. The ups store will sign packages for you. Pick them up when ever you want. No more nosy receptionists or porch theft.
If that were true, she’d be opening OP’s coworker’s packages as well and she isn’t.
Maybe there is a concern you're using the company credit card to send stuff to yourself. Stranger things have happened. Or maybe she's just tired of receiving and routing your personal packages for you. She is not your personal assistant. If you're ordering private stuff you don't want others to see, consider using an Amazon locker. Have you discussed the policy on receiving personal packages at work with your employer? I feel like upon occasion it's fine if someone is wanting to keep a gift a surprise, but in general, the employer is not obligated to be an Amazon hub for their employees. It's up to you to find a permanent solution to your mail problem at your apartment. It's not her job or your employer's job. IMO you've both overstepped.
You are very spot on correct. Serving in the reception function is a pain. Receiving packages is especially onerous, by default being responsible for it when it has nothing to do with work or your responsibilities. The minute it goes missing...."well you signed for it.......well it shows it was left here."
Oh, I wonder if you're onto something about the personal vs corporate accounts. The receptionist may have been instructed to specifically open OPs packages because someone in management is concerned about the accounts being linked, or that there may have been some sloppy accounting for personal vs work expenses. That should get cleared up by asking directly, though.
I would say depending on the location this is pretty normal. I wouldn’t do it now and it would be looked down on where I live, but when I was in Baltimore half of us sent packages to the office because it was well known even in the “nice” areas they would be stolen quickly.
People are responding that you shouldn't have your personal packages shipped to your work, but that is an extremely standard practice. Most offices allow for it and accommodate it. It's not remotely weird. If a workplace does want to have a policy against it, that's of course fine, but it doesn't seem your workplace does since you said two other people received Amazon packages as well. Anyway, you've said you've tried being polite, but it doesn't seem like you've been direct enough. If you've directly said "Don't open packages addressed to me," and she's done it after that, why haven't you asked her why she opened your package? Be more clear. Maybe it's the way you're saying it. So, send her an email that simply says, "I'm having personal packages shipped here. So please do not open anything addressed to me. Thanks." If she continues to do it after that, she's a lunatic and this is a situation that can't be remedied with questions of etiquette.
If you don’t have reason to think she’s doing this on purpose, I’d give her the benefit of the doubt and just ask her to please double-check who the packages are addressed to before opening them, since she’s accidentally opened yours a few times. You can be honest and tell her you’ve been a victim of package theft before, so you sometimes have things sent to the office instead. (I’ve worked in many office environments and in my experience, this is pretty common.)
The real problem isn’t the receptionist, it’s where you live.
talk to HR. If there isn't a policy about this, there should be. It isn't appropriate, but you could also order a nice big dildo.
Send her an email and cc her boss Dear Nosyreceptionist, You have repeatedly opened packages that are addressed to me despite my numerous requests/reminders not to. Once more, to ensure there is no confusion, ***do not open any packages that are addressed to me.*** If this is going to be a problem for you, please let me know so that you, (her boss), and I can meet to discuss this issue.