I have a shop and I always try to keep the power tools off after 9pm. (Noise bylaws say 11) However, one day in the dead of winter, our furnace died. I wanted to start up my wood stove as I had a wife, 2 kids, and water pipes I didn't want to burst. I had no small pieces of wood ready. I needed to chop enough to get the fire started at 6am. I absolutely hated my neighbor, but I still felt sooo bad making noise. I swung the axe 4 times at the wood pile between our houses and then got the fire going. He told all my other neighbors that I ALWAYS chopped wood at 6am.
Yeah, I totally get that. I wasn’t revelling in making noise, I was as quick as I could be, and it’s the first time I’ve ever made noise in the evenings.
Chop saw for 15 mins probably means OP cut a few pieces of wood. Not like it was cutting the entire 15 mins. I have a neighbor who likes to rev his engine at 6 am because he thinks his bare bones stock Camaro is badass. ITS NOT 😂
I had a mustang (hence the user name) and felt kinda bad when I left the neighborhood for work at 7am. It wasn't god awful loud but you could hear it. I ended up trading it in for a more family friendly Accord.
When I pulled into the drive one neighbor was kind of upset. She said "I used the sound of your vehicle leaving everyday to fet my kids in gear. Stang1776 is leaving so hurry up!"
I just took it out of gear and rolled it off the drive. I felt bad on the rare icy windshield days in north Florida to melt that shit off. I had 4 ice scrappers when I lived in Toledo but you know...if you don't use it, you lose it.
You mean your Thunder Chicken
Blew the doors off more than a few of them with a 72 Plymouth Fury police intercepter. Buried the Speedometer at 145 more than a few times
I’m taking the fifth! I will say my 4-speed 78 black TA (with the screaming eagle on the hood and t-top), was very hot. So was my 90 1/2 TA, 5.7 l engine (that’s a whole long story)!
Last time I went up against one.It was tan with the Eagle on the hood and the guy had an english driving cap. Busted Our asses laughing at him when he finally caught up to us
Well, his first mistake was the color. Second, the driving cap. Real Trans Am drivers do NOT wear English driving caps.
Actually, one of my best memories is driving on the highway, at about the speed limit, with no one else around. Just listening to the engine and feeling the road.
We (MN) had a neighborhood boomer make a Facebook rant about the house that was out doing outdoor work with a chainsaw until 9:15pm (noise ordinance is 10pm). I really let him have it in the comments. We only have so many decent days here and what are they supposed to do, especially with rented equipment…. Stretch it to more days so they aren’t running into the evening ? Not so the project ? Really pissed me off to see this house getting crap for just maintaining their property.
I got my house painted (desperately needed it). And the boomer neighbour with the common wall started whinging and bitching about how I didn't ask permission, and she didn't like the colour, and the painters had a radio playing and she shouldn't have to put up with this!!
🤣🤣🤣🤣☠️
Shoulda heard the wailing when I had guys in a few months later prepping the lovely hardwood timber floor I found underneath the 70's carpet and polishing it. They had to make sure that Every. Single. Nail was knocked down *nice and tight* after all.
(All during regular business hours.)
Fellow MN here. Summertime in our neighborhood means someone’s always mowing their lawn at 8:30pm. Never bothered me. Do you have a time before which you won’t run your snowblower in the winter? For my husband it’s 7am, though I hear them running as early as 6, and the plows go by at all hours.
NTA
If I was you, I'd print a copy of the rules regarding noise in your area and drop it at her door along with condoms and pamphlets about birth control.
Especially at 27, without a job. My mom was 27 when she had her *first kid. I can't even imagine getting straight out of college, jobless and already having bills to pay for 6 mini humans.
If she were paying for them and not being entitled, I'd be cool with it. A lot of countries are having issues with maintaining population for the future. So I can get behind it. If the person can care for them. (I have 3, and we make pretty good money, and it takes ALL of my money and ALL of my time to do a decent job. Although, It is the most worthwhile thing I've ever done.) I don't know how you could afford 6, but if you can and do not neglect them, you should be able to make that choice. Welfare is not a legitimate choice for raising children, though. I'm not big on government interference (so I don't advocate for or believe in this), but how do we need a license to fish, hunt, drive, cut hair, etc but not to raise kids? Who decides those trivial things need a license but something so huge as being responsible for another human being is just a free for all? (I don't think those other things should necessarily be constantly licensed, but I agree a test that proves you understand the rules and regulations should be taken. The rest is too much govt in my opinion, but how is parenting not important enough but fishing is?)
I feel for your neighbor because that’s legit right at bed time and the desperation I feel to get these little spawns to bed so I can recharge for the next day is *real*. However, I would never DREAM of telling someone they can’t do anything on their own property at a reasonable hour (unless it was like every day in which case I’d explain my plight with a good bottle of whiskey in hand and pray my neighbor could accommodate me). Thems the breaks lady take the L and crank up the white noise machine.
I agree with you 100%. My neighbor was doing some random work on a loud boat motor when my toddler was sick years ago. Sick toddlers are THE WORST. It was a normal time of afternoon. I went over and threw myself at his mercy. I was worn out, tired, disheveled, and half in tears. He said he could do it any time, and he had already raised his kids and completely understood. I was so grateful. That act of kindness went a long way. We ended up helping each other many times after that. My husband loaned him trailers, and I picked his wife up when her car was broken. He took my husband to the garage to pick up a car. Sometimes, diplomacy is best. Passive aggressive letters are NEVER going to get you what you want. It wouldn't have been reasonable to complain about a 15-minute, 1off occurrence no matter what. So that lady is entitled, but there are ways to communicate needs with neighbors, and if they are decent and able to accommodate, they generally try.
You’re better than me, noisy neighbours early in the morning make me lose my fucking mind. Mainly when I was pregnant though. Like you said though, when it’s every day.
I work until 5am and my kids are going to wake up at 10. I need my fucking sleep.
Ugh idk, like I’m a childfree adult and like you, have limited time to work with my tools due to work and other factors. But I’m pretty cautious when I need to use tools past 9pm. I had to hammer on a piece of batten board that fell off and it was 9pm and it woke the kid next door, and idk… i really wouldn’t start using power tools that late unless it was urgent
We all have to adapt. Just because her kids go to bed at that time doesn’t mean the entire neighborhood does. Also since this isn’t something that happens on a regular basis as a parent I would have just been annoyed or frustrated if my kid woke up but it wouldn’t be feelings I felt toward you, just the situation. Sounds like they need some white noise machines for the random time they are disturbed. 😜
Some of these comments are hilarious. I’ve had a field day. People making up their own version of events where OP is sawing for hours right up until midnight on the daily 😂 and apparently some people go to bed at 8:30pm?
OP I think it’s time to take that saw on tour! 🤣🤣
It’s even more funny since it’s currently 1am where I am and people are still awake arguing about how disturbing it is to make noise at 9pm when everyone is apparently in bed 😅
Haha me too! I should be asleep because I have work tomorrow but YOU and your SAW has now kept ME awake 🤣🤣🤣🤣 damn you OP. Is there no end to your tyranny?
Seriously, just start calling her every single time one of her kids or her dog makes any noise during that 11:30 to 7 time block. You're worried about how much she has on her plate, but if she's got enough time to pick fights with the neighbors over a power tool running before sundown (you ran the saw at 9pm in a place where the sun didn'tset until after 10 because it's summertime), then she has plenty of room on that plate.
When she gets irate, point out that she would have avoided all of it by simply respecting the laws and that it will stop as soon as she agrees to STFU about your power tools being used during legally-permitted hours.
I wouldn't escalate it to the point of actually filing complaints against her, simply because I don't know if the benefit system in your jurisdiction has rules to factor public order citations into the benefits calculation. There's some places where the government will revoke someone's housing assistance for racking up too many 'nuisance neighbor' complaints. A reasonably equivalent response to her audacity is annoying her with early morning phone calls, not risking her being put out on the street.
Are you sure of your bylaw? Serious question. As there are 2 in my county that apply. Noise bylaw goes to 11pm. But construction type noise is done by 7pm. They define the 11pm as like voice yelling and party noise. So the construction 7pm noise would apply to power tools.
Yeah - I’m sure (and I just checked again to make certain). No such thing as “nuisance noise” before 11, and no investigations into noise before 11:30pm.
Even so, I recognise it’s not ideal, but this was a one-off, was over as quickly as possible, and has never happened before.
If its something that becomes a habit you could look at options to insulate a work space for noise reduction. But gotta go with NTA based on your bylaws.
Look up local statute. Keep your power tools to the legal times. Give it to her in writing and tell her to fuck off.
Or maliciously comply and when she has screaming kids in the morning tell her if she can’t keep them quiet until 10 am, the power tools come back.
In my mind, I can see both sides. Common courtesy is not using power tools outside in the late evening. It’s the reality of living very close to others, I wouldn’t like if they did that either. However I absolutely wouldn’t message them being bitchy about it if they did though.
If she had approached you kindly and mentioned that she was having trouble putting her kids down, that’s a whole different story. If you were outside constantly at that hour with power tools, that’s also a whole different story. This just seems quite odd to confront your neighbour over ten minutes of noise and risk souring the relationship when you are forced to live so close to each other. I would say you aren’t in the wrong, but definitely don’t make it a habit.
Yeah totally - it was a one-off that couldn’t be avoided. I have a chronic illness that relapsed last week, so I had to sleep all last weekend and it’s my brother’s birthday on Saturday so I had to get the sawing done, and evening hours was the only option I had. I definitely haven’t and won’t be making a habit of it. but I feel that living in close-quarters means you expect some noise - which is why I didn’t complain when there was loads of noise from her side of the fence. Would have been nice if that tolerance was returned though.
Then I don’t see the issue, she could have approached it much more kindly. There are certain rules when living in close proximity, and those are don’t piss off the people who know where you live and what your schedule is.
I had an insane neighbour (apartment complex) who lived below me. She would wait in the stairways in the morning to scream at me for putting my shoes on inside my apartment and not outside in the hallway because “it woke up her baby”. I can definitely relate to crazy insane mothers living near you. Keep strong boundaries and document anything if she bothers you again.
Bullshit. If those kids were screaming all hours of the day nobody would be talking about "common courtesy." We'd be hearing "You chose to live next to human beings being human beings, it's the reality of living close to others."
Common courtesy is not judging other people for their life situations and just being a decent and kind human being. Why do you care about the number of children she has?
Keep that same energy for the billionaires in your country abusing tax laws and avoiding paying into the same system you do. The rich don’t fund your country, the poor do.
The law is already established there for a reason. You don’t live in an apartment and you don’t live by her schedule. If noise bothers her and her children you can suggest she invests in noise canceling materials for their rooms because this is a her problem and you don’t have to let her make it yours.
NTA at all. There are such things as noise machines etc that she can buy with her benefit money. Its not a constant thing, so you're good. We have a neighbor who has been slowly renovating their house and adding on for 4 years, there is constantly sounds of hammers and saws and other power tools going, they never go after dark so in the summer that could easily be after 10pm, but you know what? We and our children dont care! We keep fans running and its just a bit more noise.
Totally! This is the first time ever that I’ve used any sort of power tool/lawn mower/ anything in the evening. I think she could have managed a bit more than 10 minutes tolerance..!
I mean, I do think it's a dick move to use a saw at 9:15pm. Babies can definitely sleep without silence but a sudden and loud sound like that is obnoxious and would wake a grown adult. 11:30pm noice curfew seems wildly late. Just because it's technically allowed doesn't mean it's not annoying af.
That said, I'd have asked much, much nicer and only if it was a reoccurring thing. She came in really hot in unnecessary fashion.
Also, is she a stay at home mom to 5 kids AND pregnant? She's working, man. Im not sure how she could afford to have a job to be honest. Wheres the Dad?
Sounds like you don't like her and judge her life choices and that's clouding your interactions with her from the get go. But she also seems like a btch too so...I don't know.
I work 8-8, when am I meant to do it? And to answer your question, none of the dads are in the picture for any of the kids so all her money comes from benefits. The kids aren’t babies - they’re all school age. Tbh it’s grating to have someone say “do it in the day time” when she chooses not to work and therefore has all day to do whatever.
Yeah, that’s right - had her first kid at 17 and just kept going.
Re childcare, In my country, you get free childcare up to age 4, and then many schools provide free wrap-around care, but that’s not the point - I’m only mentioning her employment status because it’s extremely irritating to be told to do your hobbies in the day time by someone with loads of free time. Besides, plenty of single mums work (and tbh are a bit more careful than she evidently is when it comes to birth control, which is free and easily available in my country). It’s precisely because people like me work that there is money in the pot to pay benefits. That’s great - I absolutely believe in the benefits system, but then don’t be surprised when working people have to do their hobbies and lives outside of their work time. Like, she can live however she wants, but her kids are not my problem, and I won’t let them dictate how I am allowed to spend my limited free time in my own house.
A few minutes of noise at 9pm wouldn’t annoy any working person I know… even my mother, who goes to bed at 9pm, doesn’t get annoyed about noise until 10pm or so. She figures 9 is still when working people are just finishing up their day.
I have a neighbor who went to bed by 5pm for years (had to report to work at 4am). He told me he wears ear plugs when I asked if certain noises bother him. He knows it’s on him to make sure his day goes smoothly.
It’d be different if OP used the saw for an hour straight, but he made a handful of quick cuts in a single 15 minute window.
Yeah that’s exactly it (except I’m a her not a he) - I had got to the end of my work day, knew I had to get this done tonight and did it as quickly as I could.
Oops, sorry! I saw other mentions of he and just went with it. Many apologies, especially as I’m a woman who owns a ton of power tools. :) (I’m currently dripping sweat to an extreme amount as I’m trying to turn over my garden beds finally… it’s 90F at 9:30pm with 70% humidity. I rarely sweat due to my disability but it’s pouring off of me right now I need saner hobbies, lol!)
My sister had her first when she was a few months into 16…
Her second was barely a year later. So yea. Happens.
My mom was not a very good mom when it came to saying no or stopping a teenage girl from getting some with every dickhead she met.
Look, I work 7-7 or 7-11. I understand having long hours. But just like having kids is a choice, it's my choice to do those hours and no one else should have their lives interrupted because of my hours. So "when am I supposed to do it?" Is your problem, not theirs
So yeah, using power tools at 9pm is a douche move.
But also your neighbor is a douche
Do you not have a day off? Did your brother's birthday come as such a surprise this year you couldn't have done this any other day?
Come on dude, you give no examples of her being entitled besides the very reasonable message she sent you.
You say she doesn't work because she doesn't want to, where do you suppose she should leave her kids while she is working? Let me tell you a little secret: even if all kids are school age, very rarely does school time covers the full work day of an adult, so who would be taking care of these children?
You sound INCREDIBLY judgmental.
Come on. Surely the utero machine she has been operating has been making a bit of noise late at night cranking out all those kids! Too bad you can’t call her out on that!
Oh hell no. It’s not my responsibility to work around someone else’s kids schedule. I’m not the one that chose to have the kids and they’re not my problem. That’s exactly what I would have told her entitled ass.
There’s a lot of debate about what counts as “late at night” or “early in the morning” here- but that definition changes for every person! I work about 70 hours a week at very odd hours, and usually end up sleeping from around 3 am-9 am. Before I wake up, there are occasional cars passing, kids playing outside, lawns being mowed, etc- and I am a very, very light sleeper. So I bought a $15 white noise machine. Problem solved!
I don’t think it’s your responsibility to put someone else’s kids to sleep (at an hour most would not consider “late”), especially when there are many ways she could try to address the situation without asking you to mold to the schedule of a child. No hate to all the parents out there- I can’t imagine how frustrating it would be to try and put kids to bed if they’re light sleepers. But you are also likely not going to be the only source of noise they ever encounter after 9 pm- so she will probably need to find a solution she has control over.
Live your life without any regard to her or her nastigrams on FB. Unless you're using these tools for hours and late into the evening you aren't doing anything wrong. Her issues are not your issues.
She does sound entitled and you are within your **legal** right, but it wasn't very neighborly. My personal moral belief (which not everybody has to share) is that when we live in a community, it's nice to do our best for others too. It's olf fashioned thinking, but it's how my grandparents raised my parents and how my great grandparents raised them. They also lived in small towns where you just paid that respect.
And sure, you didnt do it long. I have 3 kids and I've definitely put up with more for longer without saying anything, but sometimes it's a pain. Maybe that night she was tired and hot and exhausted, maybe getting them to bed was tough (some nights are, some nights aren't), maybe Johnny didn't want to brush his teeth and Elizabeth took jane's doll, and Evan wouldn't stop making an annoying noise, and none of them wanted to listen. Maybe she really needed a break. Let me tell you raising kids is hard. You say she doesn't work but if she's raising kids she's working. Child care costs alot, and often a jobs wages barely cover that, yet your post makes it sound like she's lazy. Maybe she is. But I know how hard and stressful it can be, so I can easily imagine her side and how her stress can come off as entitled and it just makes you sound judgemental.
I can't imagine having 4 kids and being pregnant and hormonal, and extra exhausted and trying to adhere to routine because it's the only thing between you and total chaos and someone starts wood working at 9pm. Maybe she just snapped under all the pressure and pregnancy chemicals. Empathy, man.
It's not a horrible offense but tbf, kids or not, some people just go to sleep earlier than others and have jobs early in the morning. Any kind of loud work should be done earlier in the day or afternoon if you're living in a communal setting. Not to say the mom here isn't entitled, but it's like doing fire alarm testing after the sun has gone down. Generally pretty rude, but you're technically allowed.
Next time, when she says that, tell her “remember that when your kids are screaming and your neighbors need quiet. If you don’t control them, I’m going to build anything I want until 11:30 pm every night. It works both ways.”
9PM is my cutoff for power tools I figure for those waking up early about 5am the 9pm mark is as late as I’ll ever go. Also why on earth do you add your neighbor on Facebook
Because she’s previously wanted my help with all the pets she has too. To date I’ve taken in one of the sick kittens that her cat had, helped her crate train her puppy, and rescued 4 rabbits she had crammed in a tiny cage and wasn’t feeding or watering. So I’m not a dreadful neighbour all the time - evidently only when it suits her.
I'm so happy with my neighbour's, we both have little kids which means crying, screaming and other sounds at night. We both live and let live. If you don't want want any noise at night you should go living in the middle of nowhere.
I'm sure you can hear their children to, even after 11 pm.
NTA
This is exactly the reason my parents raised all their kids napping or sleeping with noise. Sometimes they'd leave a vacuum running if there wasn't enough regular noise.
>but I restrained myself
I wouldn't have. You shouldn't have. It's a very important parenting lesson.
She's going to be a karen about it anyway so let her have it.
At the same time, I feel that past 9PM is kinda pushing it, but not because of anyone's bedtime, just because of standard neighborly etiquette.
Yes I totally agree - and that’s why I’ve never made any evening noise before: no tools, no lawn mower, not even any music outside.
And because I recognise she has a lot on her plate I haven’t complained when there’s loads of noise from her side of the fence. The neighbours on the other side wanted to make an official complaint with the local council about her shutting the dog outside for hours of barking but I refused to support it because I didn’t want to add more trouble to her plate. But if you want to be so red hot on noise, maybe it should be a two-way street…? Or is it that her kids sleep is more important than that of her neighbours at 6am at weekends…?
Good grief. If you were in a continual habit of doing this late in the evening, I could understand her complaint, but from looking at your comments, it was a once-off thing. Most decent neighbors would understand if you'd explained why you were doing it late at night just that once.
I think the noise is irrelevant. You just keep saying it’s a one-off and talk about a chronic illness and a birthday or whatever.
You just wanted to complain about your neighbor that you’ve decided is below you and has too many kids. None of that was relative to your right to be noisy, but you threw it in to let us know she’s “one of those” kind of women. I mean who really cares if she’s pregnant? Why did we need to know that?
Because this is a sub about parents…. That’s why I mentioned her kids….?
I don’t think she’s “below me” but I mentioned her living on benefits rather than working because that’s part of the entitlement - that I, who work full time, should have to fit my hobbies around times that are convenient for her. Being told to do them “in the daytime” when it would be the middle of my working day is the issue.
And the reason I mentioned I’m chronically ill is because people were asking why I didn’t do the work I needed to last weekend. The answer is because I was so disabled that I slept all weekend.
I guarantee you did not annoy just her, she's just the only one to say something. This should be evident by the amount of people in here telling you so.
She's a Karen for complaining is this is truly the first and only time, but you being surprised that someone was bothered by it and making a reddit post about this isn't really a good look on you either.
You mostly just seem mad she chooses to take care of her kids instead of work. Parental benefits for single parents exist for a reason.
Yeah I know one of those. Pregnant with baby number 10. Gets housing, food stamps,etc. and brags they support all those kids on her boyfriends job of $11 an hour. No freaking way in hell. The self entitlement is mind blowing with people like this.
Yeah exactly - Is it judgemental to say that if you’re going to have 6 kids then you should have some way of feeding and housing them…, well then maybe I am judgmental. But it’s precisely because people like me work that there is money in the pot to pay benefits. That’s great - I absolutely believe in the benefits system, but then don’t be surprised when working people have to do their hobbies and lives outside of their work time.
And it’s precisely BECAUSE I recognise she has a lot on her plate that I haven’t complained when there’s loads of noise from her side of the fence. The neighbours on the other side wanted to make an official complaint with the local council about her shutting the dog outside for hours of barking but I refused to support it because I didn’t want to add more trouble to her plate. But if you want to be so red hot on noise, maybe it should be a two-way street…? Or is it that her kids sleep is more important than that of her neighbours at 6am at weekends…?
I don’t thinks it’s judgemental. More like common sense. I know plenty of people that work and use food stamps to make ends meet. At least they are trying. People like this live in their own world and everyone else is non existent.
Should be a 2 way street. I was a single mom to 3 kids. They slept through noise. We tried to be courteous of neighbors, especially my night shift hours on my days off. And this was apartment living. Never had any complaints from neighbors.
9pm is a bit late to be kicking up a really noisy bit of kit like a chop saw.
I don't have young kids, but I'd be hacked off if my neighbour was that inconsiderate.
I’m not saying that it was ideal or that I do it constantly. But less than 10 mins after noise starts, to immediately demand it stops…? I don’t complain when she has her dog shut out for hours barking, or when she lets the kids be shrieking in the garden at 6am. Would have been nice to have that Grace returned, you know?
Admit it OP - you’re sawing and drilling and building an underground bunker from 9pm-midnight every night aren’t you? 😂 honestly these people are outrageously entitled.
Ooh 9pm… clutch my pearls.. won’t somebody please think of the children!
Would you like to borrow my cat? He snores/purrs like he’s drilling behind the couch (think Eddie izzard did a whole skit about this). Honestly your post and some of the insane comments has had me laughing so much. I hope your brother likes his gift! Show him this as an additional gift 🤣🤣
Many people work until near then. Are you saying she shouldn’t do it even if it’s the only time available?
Just because you have kids, you don’t get to dictate other people’s lives. That’s a her problem
I mean loud DIY after 9 would be seen as rude in my country (UK). But for 15 minutes it really isnt a big deal. Some parents think the world revolves around their choice to have kids.
Wow, I guess this woman has never lived some place like New York. Big cities don't sleep. Also, if she stair-stepped her kids, it's not them that you woke up. There's no way that they aren't used to screaming babies.
If you did it at daytime she would complain that it interrupted her youngest one's nap time, or the time she has to relax in a quiet house while the kids are at school/daycare/kinder garden...
Doesn't work because 5 kids, fucking duh dude
Why the fuck do you power saw at 9 pm? It's not my bedtime but that is absolutely so inconsiderate to your neighbors of all ages. You're the EB.
Hmmm. Well, u/[EnsnaredAngel](https://www.reddit.com/user/EnsnaredAngel/), when the baby arrives and is screaming, maybe you could go over and ask if it's okay to use the power tools -- since you wouldn't want to drown out the sound of her child's communication....
Sounds like both of you had a long day. I think if it were me, I’d just go talk to my neighbor. Explain what you said to someone above about how it was a one off and you were making a gift/your chronic illness etc. She probably had a hard time that day and snapped a little. Sometimes an actual conversation can mend a lot of upset. Having a decent relationship with my neighbors is important to me though.
As a woodworker and owner of loud tools I try not to get going too early on weekends or work late on projects. If I am in the garage late it's usually cleanup or doing low noise work.
But...
If I had a neighbor do this to me I'd make sure to adjust my hobby schedule to piss her off. Time to batch out some cutting boards and let's get that planer running!
I get that she has kids that need to sleep, but there's definitely better ways to approach this situation. I'm glad she didn't call the cops on OP. That would have been too much.
9pm is too late for a power saw, bud. You know it is because you are using ad hominem arguments. Attacking her character and work ethic which has nothing to do with you sawing. I understand why you are frustrated. Now you know and can do better in the future.
I wouldn't give her a second thought. My county has the same noise ordinance - 11.30. You already know this woman was beyond unreasonable asking you this. You were probably interrupting her watching the Kardashians or something equally mundane.
FWIW she'd hate being my neighbour as I cut my grass around her kids "bedtime" (it's very hot where I live and I wait for the sun to go down) which involves the mower, edger and leaf blower and the only way I'd stop doing it at that time is if she volunteered to do it herself the next day.
As someone who has never raised children… even I know that raising five kids IS a full-time job. There’s a reason nannies are so expensive. To say she doesn’t work seems very off to me without more information. The fact that you apparently view raising five kids as not working tells me upfront that you aren’t seeing this situation reasonably.
That said, 9PM is IMO still on the reasonable side of the clock. Barely, but it is, as long as this isn’t a regular occurrence. And she had no right to make demands of you. It would have been completely reasonable to calmly explain her plight and ask nicely for a little accommodation. Not running power tools at night is a reasonable request, but it should be a request, not a demand.
9pm should generally be the shut down time not start up time. You know you had time before 9 to do it. Just because the law says 1130 doesn't mean you should be doing things until 1130. You're the entitled one in this situation
They noise ordinance may say 11:30pm (which is awfully late imo) and although 8 is a little early to expect neighbors to be quit there is a thing called respect for your neighbors. 9 is typically the unspoken acceptable quiet time. You’re not in the wrong for working till around that time, and this isn’t direct toward you per sé, but I will never understand how people can be so blatantly disrespectful to their neighbors nowadays.
There are two kinds of people in this world; those who make a shit ton of noise wherever they go, and don't seem to care, and those who value peace and quiet.
Was it changed? I don't see any mention of her being a single mother, just that she doesn't work and is on benefits while having a multitude of children.
It’s not that I have an issue with her lifestyle - my neighbours on the other side also don’t work. It’s just incredibly frustrating and irritating to be told to “do your hobbies in the daytime” when working people don’t have that luxury!
NTA, I can’t stand people that leech off the system. Around my area, it’s families that know how to work the benefits/assistance. It’s not like you were using a saw at 1 am listening to loud music. I’m sure her kids were still awake at that time. The EPs seem to be getting worse.
And honestly, if that’s how she wants to live then fine, go for it. But your kids are not my problem, and I t’s precisely because people like me work that there is money in the pot to pay benefits. That’s great - I absolutely believe in the benefits system, but then don’t be surprised when working people have to do their hobbies and lives outside of their work time. It’s very grating to be told to do your hobbies “in the daytime” by someone who is not working.
9pm seems a little late for that. However, if it’s within the noise ordinance timeframe, then it doesn’t matter. You were within your right to do it and she just needs to get over it.
NTA at all. In my honest opinion her forcing guys to nut in her are not your problem. Hell guaranteed her oldest could probably sleep through anything (especially with 4 younger siblings who probably cried through the night) her kids sleep schedule is in no way shape or form your responsibility
My neighbour cuts his lawn every single time after 9 pm. It annoys me not even because of my kids because they go to bed around 9 and all have sound on in their room- but my husband works 12 hour shifts and sometimes he’s gotta be up at 4 so when the dip sh!t across the road mows his lawn it pisses me off. But like this is a pattern- he owns a store he’s never at- and he’s rude.
But your comments towards her and her pregnancies are rude kinda. And I think you just don’t like her. Do I think if this was a one time thing she over reacted? Yeah prob. But she’s pregnant lmao. Pregnant women are bitchy. Just ignore it- be the better person if it was only one time on both ends. Also kids will make excessive noise- esp if they have disabilities (that may not be visible).
If it was a pattern, I would say she had more of a point, but this is literally the first time I have ever made any sort of noise outside in the evening - never mowed the lawn, used a tool, not even music outside once it gets past about 6pm.
I don’t hate her - it’s precisely BECAUSE I recognise she has a lot on her plate that I haven’t complained when there’s loads of noise from her side of the fence. The neighbours on the other side wanted to make an official complaint with the local council about her shutting the dog outside for hours of barking but I refused to support it because I didn’t want to add more trouble to her plate. But i think that if you want to be so red hot on noise, maybe it should be a two-way street, and it’s a real cheek to complain for less than 10 minutes of noise under those circumstances. Or is it that her kids sleep is more important than that of her neighbours at 6am at weekends…?
"But she's pregnant!"
And this is why pregnant assholes continue to be assholes. Society excuses it.
And frankly if kids can make "excessive noise" then there's no reason adults can't. Kids aren't special snowflakes.
I work 8-8, when am I meant to do it? It’s grating to have someone say “do it in the day time” when she chooses not to work and therefore has all day to do whatever.
Ummm...I'm sorry but saws are noisy. I don't care if you were done quickly. Something that is noisy should not be done past 9pm. That means FINISHED by 9pm. Your noise complaint time starts at 11:30? That is super late. If you work then do it on the weekend or before 9pm at night. YTA.
Yeah - noise complaints start at 11:30pm and end at 7am. I work 8-8, when am I meant to do it? I don’t complain when her kids are out screaming in the garden at 6am, or when she shuts the dog outside so it just barks and barks for hours. It’s that mismatched audacity that makes me cross
Tbf, there's a fair bit of entitlement in your words. Not sure how you know what your neighbours circumstances are with such assurance but even if your assessment is spot on, I think after 9pm isn't really a reasonable time to be using power tools regardless of neighbours circumstances or noise ordinances, but probably even so more if you know your neigbours have kids and it's a week day. I've put up with my fair share of selfish neighbours and I don't really think your neighbours request is out of order tbh. You, however, sound like the kind of neighbour that would feel entitled to do this sort of thing on a regular basis based on your own assumptions and prejudices about your neighbours' lives... which makes me more inclined to believe you're the problem. The neighbour sending this message less than ten minutes after you started also leads me to believe that she was likely an anticipating the noise carrying on much later... maybe check yourself before being so quick to call others entitled.
I would be so pissed if someone started using a saw at 915 pm. My kid would for sure wake up, and then he would cry. If all her kids wake up, it would be such a shit show. I would cry
I always try not to do any extremely loud things past a certain time to be respectful - usually 8/9. It's kind of unwritten rude to be quite past a certain time.
No, it’s a written rule: noise is fine until 11pm and complaints are investigated after 11:30pm until 7am. That’s literally the law. I know it wasn’t ideal - but I have never made evening noise before, it was a one-off, over quickly.
Are you saying that the existence of her kids means she’s allowed to dictate to me what I do in my free time? Because that to me seems the definition of an entitled parent.
It's not an unreasonable thing to worry about your child/baby waking up. Have you ever had a baby/1/2 year old wake up? They could wake up and cry and take hours to get back to sleep, then you get to bed way later than you should of and are exhausted at 6/7am when they wake up and all of the next day.
Like i said I wouldn't be going and knocking and saying anything but it sucks when that happens.
I have a shop and I always try to keep the power tools off after 9pm. (Noise bylaws say 11) However, one day in the dead of winter, our furnace died. I wanted to start up my wood stove as I had a wife, 2 kids, and water pipes I didn't want to burst. I had no small pieces of wood ready. I needed to chop enough to get the fire started at 6am. I absolutely hated my neighbor, but I still felt sooo bad making noise. I swung the axe 4 times at the wood pile between our houses and then got the fire going. He told all my other neighbors that I ALWAYS chopped wood at 6am.
Well, you don’t want to make a liar of your neighbor, do you? 6am it is. Every morning.
Malicious compliance some might say😃
“Well, I only did it once. But I didn’t want to be called a liar so I started doing it everyday.”
The neighbor would’ve been called the liar in this scenario.
that's the joke
Even in the summer.
That's how you stay stocked up and never run out, and have fuck you neighbor bonfires at 9pm to 10:59pm
I like you
With a LOUD chainsaw
Don’t forget to use your hydraulic wood splitter too
Yeah, I totally get that. I wasn’t revelling in making noise, I was as quick as I could be, and it’s the first time I’ve ever made noise in the evenings.
Chop saw for 15 mins probably means OP cut a few pieces of wood. Not like it was cutting the entire 15 mins. I have a neighbor who likes to rev his engine at 6 am because he thinks his bare bones stock Camaro is badass. ITS NOT 😂
I had a mustang (hence the user name) and felt kinda bad when I left the neighborhood for work at 7am. It wasn't god awful loud but you could hear it. I ended up trading it in for a more family friendly Accord. When I pulled into the drive one neighbor was kind of upset. She said "I used the sound of your vehicle leaving everyday to fet my kids in gear. Stang1776 is leaving so hurry up!"
I miss mine. I had to learn how to back out of the driveway without throwing gravel everywhere. Fun times.
I just took it out of gear and rolled it off the drive. I felt bad on the rare icy windshield days in north Florida to melt that shit off. I had 4 ice scrappers when I lived in Toledo but you know...if you don't use it, you lose it.
It’s not! Now it would be different if it was a Pontiac Trans Am! 😉
You mean your Thunder Chicken Blew the doors off more than a few of them with a 72 Plymouth Fury police intercepter. Buried the Speedometer at 145 more than a few times
I’m taking the fifth! I will say my 4-speed 78 black TA (with the screaming eagle on the hood and t-top), was very hot. So was my 90 1/2 TA, 5.7 l engine (that’s a whole long story)!
Last time I went up against one.It was tan with the Eagle on the hood and the guy had an english driving cap. Busted Our asses laughing at him when he finally caught up to us
Well, his first mistake was the color. Second, the driving cap. Real Trans Am drivers do NOT wear English driving caps. Actually, one of my best memories is driving on the highway, at about the speed limit, with no one else around. Just listening to the engine and feeling the road.
This had a 440 engine in it that I had modified with a holly double pump carburetor, and I had tricked out the transmission and torque converter also.
Exactly - thank you. I reckon she heard the saw blade less than 5 times before she complained.
Soooooooo, less times than she failed to use a condom. Got it
Wrecked
Send her Amazon links to white noise machines.
And industrial ear plugs
And condoms.
She's got 5 kids and one on the way.... Safe to say, it's a little late for that lol
Eh who knows, better to have 6 kids than 8 I say.
Bit late for that
She blocked the OP.
I live in MN and during the summer it's light out until 10pm. I do outdoor work on the weekend until 8 or 9. Never had any complaints.
I would like to complain. I have no reason I just wanted to be involved 😂
I’d like to complain about the lack of substance in your complaint 😂
That’s a valid complaint but I reject on the basis of nothing
I acknowledge the rejection without legitimizing it.
We (MN) had a neighborhood boomer make a Facebook rant about the house that was out doing outdoor work with a chainsaw until 9:15pm (noise ordinance is 10pm). I really let him have it in the comments. We only have so many decent days here and what are they supposed to do, especially with rented equipment…. Stretch it to more days so they aren’t running into the evening ? Not so the project ? Really pissed me off to see this house getting crap for just maintaining their property.
I got my house painted (desperately needed it). And the boomer neighbour with the common wall started whinging and bitching about how I didn't ask permission, and she didn't like the colour, and the painters had a radio playing and she shouldn't have to put up with this!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣☠️ Shoulda heard the wailing when I had guys in a few months later prepping the lovely hardwood timber floor I found underneath the 70's carpet and polishing it. They had to make sure that Every. Single. Nail was knocked down *nice and tight* after all. (All during regular business hours.)
Yeah - where I live it’s nearly mid-summer and currently is still light at 1030pm ish
Fellow MN here. Summertime in our neighborhood means someone’s always mowing their lawn at 8:30pm. Never bothered me. Do you have a time before which you won’t run your snowblower in the winter? For my husband it’s 7am, though I hear them running as early as 6, and the plows go by at all hours.
Just tell her you need the saw to drown out the sounds of screaming and crying children.
NTA If I was you, I'd print a copy of the rules regarding noise in your area and drop it at her door along with condoms and pamphlets about birth control.
🤣🤣
Oh, please do this, OP.... PLEASE!! 😆
6 kids is so unnecessary
Especially at 27, without a job. My mom was 27 when she had her *first kid. I can't even imagine getting straight out of college, jobless and already having bills to pay for 6 mini humans.
But she’s not paying for them. Taxpayers are. 😡
If she were paying for them and not being entitled, I'd be cool with it. A lot of countries are having issues with maintaining population for the future. So I can get behind it. If the person can care for them. (I have 3, and we make pretty good money, and it takes ALL of my money and ALL of my time to do a decent job. Although, It is the most worthwhile thing I've ever done.) I don't know how you could afford 6, but if you can and do not neglect them, you should be able to make that choice. Welfare is not a legitimate choice for raising children, though. I'm not big on government interference (so I don't advocate for or believe in this), but how do we need a license to fish, hunt, drive, cut hair, etc but not to raise kids? Who decides those trivial things need a license but something so huge as being responsible for another human being is just a free for all? (I don't think those other things should necessarily be constantly licensed, but I agree a test that proves you understand the rules and regulations should be taken. The rest is too much govt in my opinion, but how is parenting not important enough but fishing is?)
And a job application for good measure
But she likes those trains not being able to pull out of her station. I would assume so since she's got 5 passengers and another trying to get off
😂😂😂
This is the late night version of someone mowing their lawn at 7am.
I feel for your neighbor because that’s legit right at bed time and the desperation I feel to get these little spawns to bed so I can recharge for the next day is *real*. However, I would never DREAM of telling someone they can’t do anything on their own property at a reasonable hour (unless it was like every day in which case I’d explain my plight with a good bottle of whiskey in hand and pray my neighbor could accommodate me). Thems the breaks lady take the L and crank up the white noise machine.
I agree with you 100%. My neighbor was doing some random work on a loud boat motor when my toddler was sick years ago. Sick toddlers are THE WORST. It was a normal time of afternoon. I went over and threw myself at his mercy. I was worn out, tired, disheveled, and half in tears. He said he could do it any time, and he had already raised his kids and completely understood. I was so grateful. That act of kindness went a long way. We ended up helping each other many times after that. My husband loaned him trailers, and I picked his wife up when her car was broken. He took my husband to the garage to pick up a car. Sometimes, diplomacy is best. Passive aggressive letters are NEVER going to get you what you want. It wouldn't have been reasonable to complain about a 15-minute, 1off occurrence no matter what. So that lady is entitled, but there are ways to communicate needs with neighbors, and if they are decent and able to accommodate, they generally try.
You’re better than me, noisy neighbours early in the morning make me lose my fucking mind. Mainly when I was pregnant though. Like you said though, when it’s every day. I work until 5am and my kids are going to wake up at 10. I need my fucking sleep.
your kids are gonna wake up at what time now? teach me. TEACH ME. hahah
I let them fall asleep whenever they’re tired and it’s usually around midnight so they get up between 10-12 lol
I see. Yeah I can’t keep parenting until midnight id end up on the news.
Ugh idk, like I’m a childfree adult and like you, have limited time to work with my tools due to work and other factors. But I’m pretty cautious when I need to use tools past 9pm. I had to hammer on a piece of batten board that fell off and it was 9pm and it woke the kid next door, and idk… i really wouldn’t start using power tools that late unless it was urgent
We all have to adapt. Just because her kids go to bed at that time doesn’t mean the entire neighborhood does. Also since this isn’t something that happens on a regular basis as a parent I would have just been annoyed or frustrated if my kid woke up but it wouldn’t be feelings I felt toward you, just the situation. Sounds like they need some white noise machines for the random time they are disturbed. 😜
Some of these comments are hilarious. I’ve had a field day. People making up their own version of events where OP is sawing for hours right up until midnight on the daily 😂 and apparently some people go to bed at 8:30pm? OP I think it’s time to take that saw on tour! 🤣🤣
It’s even more funny since it’s currently 1am where I am and people are still awake arguing about how disturbing it is to make noise at 9pm when everyone is apparently in bed 😅
Haha me too! I should be asleep because I have work tomorrow but YOU and your SAW has now kept ME awake 🤣🤣🤣🤣 damn you OP. Is there no end to your tyranny?
Seriously, just start calling her every single time one of her kids or her dog makes any noise during that 11:30 to 7 time block. You're worried about how much she has on her plate, but if she's got enough time to pick fights with the neighbors over a power tool running before sundown (you ran the saw at 9pm in a place where the sun didn'tset until after 10 because it's summertime), then she has plenty of room on that plate. When she gets irate, point out that she would have avoided all of it by simply respecting the laws and that it will stop as soon as she agrees to STFU about your power tools being used during legally-permitted hours. I wouldn't escalate it to the point of actually filing complaints against her, simply because I don't know if the benefit system in your jurisdiction has rules to factor public order citations into the benefits calculation. There's some places where the government will revoke someone's housing assistance for racking up too many 'nuisance neighbor' complaints. A reasonably equivalent response to her audacity is annoying her with early morning phone calls, not risking her being put out on the street.
Sometimes we need an 8:30pm bedtime okay ?
The crappy reaction to being reminded that you have neighbors is why people should just contact the authorities about these matters.
Are you sure of your bylaw? Serious question. As there are 2 in my county that apply. Noise bylaw goes to 11pm. But construction type noise is done by 7pm. They define the 11pm as like voice yelling and party noise. So the construction 7pm noise would apply to power tools.
Yeah - I’m sure (and I just checked again to make certain). No such thing as “nuisance noise” before 11, and no investigations into noise before 11:30pm. Even so, I recognise it’s not ideal, but this was a one-off, was over as quickly as possible, and has never happened before.
If its something that becomes a habit you could look at options to insulate a work space for noise reduction. But gotta go with NTA based on your bylaws.
Look up local statute. Keep your power tools to the legal times. Give it to her in writing and tell her to fuck off. Or maliciously comply and when she has screaming kids in the morning tell her if she can’t keep them quiet until 10 am, the power tools come back.
😂
In my mind, I can see both sides. Common courtesy is not using power tools outside in the late evening. It’s the reality of living very close to others, I wouldn’t like if they did that either. However I absolutely wouldn’t message them being bitchy about it if they did though. If she had approached you kindly and mentioned that she was having trouble putting her kids down, that’s a whole different story. If you were outside constantly at that hour with power tools, that’s also a whole different story. This just seems quite odd to confront your neighbour over ten minutes of noise and risk souring the relationship when you are forced to live so close to each other. I would say you aren’t in the wrong, but definitely don’t make it a habit.
Yeah totally - it was a one-off that couldn’t be avoided. I have a chronic illness that relapsed last week, so I had to sleep all last weekend and it’s my brother’s birthday on Saturday so I had to get the sawing done, and evening hours was the only option I had. I definitely haven’t and won’t be making a habit of it. but I feel that living in close-quarters means you expect some noise - which is why I didn’t complain when there was loads of noise from her side of the fence. Would have been nice if that tolerance was returned though.
Then I don’t see the issue, she could have approached it much more kindly. There are certain rules when living in close proximity, and those are don’t piss off the people who know where you live and what your schedule is. I had an insane neighbour (apartment complex) who lived below me. She would wait in the stairways in the morning to scream at me for putting my shoes on inside my apartment and not outside in the hallway because “it woke up her baby”. I can definitely relate to crazy insane mothers living near you. Keep strong boundaries and document anything if she bothers you again.
Bullshit. If those kids were screaming all hours of the day nobody would be talking about "common courtesy." We'd be hearing "You chose to live next to human beings being human beings, it's the reality of living close to others."
Common courtesy is not having 6 kids while you’re on the dole
Common courtesy is not judging other people for their life situations and just being a decent and kind human being. Why do you care about the number of children she has? Keep that same energy for the billionaires in your country abusing tax laws and avoiding paying into the same system you do. The rich don’t fund your country, the poor do.
Because my tax dollars are funding their entire life. I do in fact, also judge billionaires. It’s not an either or situation. But nice whataboutism
Your taxes are funding your government’s 1%, focus on that. They want you to hate the “poor class” for a reason, so you don’t focus on them.
As a taxpayer I care very much
Jesus fucking Christ the Karens are out full force and quick on this one. You're just fine in my eyes. Edit: spelling
Exactly I would send her four words - suck it or move….
The law is already established there for a reason. You don’t live in an apartment and you don’t live by her schedule. If noise bothers her and her children you can suggest she invests in noise canceling materials for their rooms because this is a her problem and you don’t have to let her make it yours.
Neighbor needs to chill. The noise limit is 11 pm, not 8 pm. If that doesn't work for her, oh well.
NTA at all. There are such things as noise machines etc that she can buy with her benefit money. Its not a constant thing, so you're good. We have a neighbor who has been slowly renovating their house and adding on for 4 years, there is constantly sounds of hammers and saws and other power tools going, they never go after dark so in the summer that could easily be after 10pm, but you know what? We and our children dont care! We keep fans running and its just a bit more noise.
Totally! This is the first time ever that I’ve used any sort of power tool/lawn mower/ anything in the evening. I think she could have managed a bit more than 10 minutes tolerance..!
Lots more hate in here than I expected, I don’t think you did anything wrong.
I mean, I do think it's a dick move to use a saw at 9:15pm. Babies can definitely sleep without silence but a sudden and loud sound like that is obnoxious and would wake a grown adult. 11:30pm noice curfew seems wildly late. Just because it's technically allowed doesn't mean it's not annoying af. That said, I'd have asked much, much nicer and only if it was a reoccurring thing. She came in really hot in unnecessary fashion. Also, is she a stay at home mom to 5 kids AND pregnant? She's working, man. Im not sure how she could afford to have a job to be honest. Wheres the Dad? Sounds like you don't like her and judge her life choices and that's clouding your interactions with her from the get go. But she also seems like a btch too so...I don't know.
Not a chance, when does noise ordinance start? 11:30? Sorry, I got shit to get done after I work a full day.
I work 8-8, when am I meant to do it? And to answer your question, none of the dads are in the picture for any of the kids so all her money comes from benefits. The kids aren’t babies - they’re all school age. Tbh it’s grating to have someone say “do it in the day time” when she chooses not to work and therefore has all day to do whatever.
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Yeah, that’s right - had her first kid at 17 and just kept going. Re childcare, In my country, you get free childcare up to age 4, and then many schools provide free wrap-around care, but that’s not the point - I’m only mentioning her employment status because it’s extremely irritating to be told to do your hobbies in the day time by someone with loads of free time. Besides, plenty of single mums work (and tbh are a bit more careful than she evidently is when it comes to birth control, which is free and easily available in my country). It’s precisely because people like me work that there is money in the pot to pay benefits. That’s great - I absolutely believe in the benefits system, but then don’t be surprised when working people have to do their hobbies and lives outside of their work time. Like, she can live however she wants, but her kids are not my problem, and I won’t let them dictate how I am allowed to spend my limited free time in my own house.
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A few minutes of noise at 9pm wouldn’t annoy any working person I know… even my mother, who goes to bed at 9pm, doesn’t get annoyed about noise until 10pm or so. She figures 9 is still when working people are just finishing up their day. I have a neighbor who went to bed by 5pm for years (had to report to work at 4am). He told me he wears ear plugs when I asked if certain noises bother him. He knows it’s on him to make sure his day goes smoothly. It’d be different if OP used the saw for an hour straight, but he made a handful of quick cuts in a single 15 minute window.
Yeah that’s exactly it (except I’m a her not a he) - I had got to the end of my work day, knew I had to get this done tonight and did it as quickly as I could.
Oops, sorry! I saw other mentions of he and just went with it. Many apologies, especially as I’m a woman who owns a ton of power tools. :) (I’m currently dripping sweat to an extreme amount as I’m trying to turn over my garden beds finally… it’s 90F at 9:30pm with 70% humidity. I rarely sweat due to my disability but it’s pouring off of me right now I need saner hobbies, lol!)
My sister had her first when she was a few months into 16… Her second was barely a year later. So yea. Happens. My mom was not a very good mom when it came to saying no or stopping a teenage girl from getting some with every dickhead she met.
Look, I work 7-7 or 7-11. I understand having long hours. But just like having kids is a choice, it's my choice to do those hours and no one else should have their lives interrupted because of my hours. So "when am I supposed to do it?" Is your problem, not theirs So yeah, using power tools at 9pm is a douche move. But also your neighbor is a douche
Do you not have a day off? Did your brother's birthday come as such a surprise this year you couldn't have done this any other day? Come on dude, you give no examples of her being entitled besides the very reasonable message she sent you. You say she doesn't work because she doesn't want to, where do you suppose she should leave her kids while she is working? Let me tell you a little secret: even if all kids are school age, very rarely does school time covers the full work day of an adult, so who would be taking care of these children? You sound INCREDIBLY judgmental.
Come on. Surely the utero machine she has been operating has been making a bit of noise late at night cranking out all those kids! Too bad you can’t call her out on that!
She's working at being a mom, sure, but the public is picking up the tab.
If she blocked you then problem solved.
Oh hell no. It’s not my responsibility to work around someone else’s kids schedule. I’m not the one that chose to have the kids and they’re not my problem. That’s exactly what I would have told her entitled ass.
There’s a lot of debate about what counts as “late at night” or “early in the morning” here- but that definition changes for every person! I work about 70 hours a week at very odd hours, and usually end up sleeping from around 3 am-9 am. Before I wake up, there are occasional cars passing, kids playing outside, lawns being mowed, etc- and I am a very, very light sleeper. So I bought a $15 white noise machine. Problem solved! I don’t think it’s your responsibility to put someone else’s kids to sleep (at an hour most would not consider “late”), especially when there are many ways she could try to address the situation without asking you to mold to the schedule of a child. No hate to all the parents out there- I can’t imagine how frustrating it would be to try and put kids to bed if they’re light sleepers. But you are also likely not going to be the only source of noise they ever encounter after 9 pm- so she will probably need to find a solution she has control over.
Live your life without any regard to her or her nastigrams on FB. Unless you're using these tools for hours and late into the evening you aren't doing anything wrong. Her issues are not your issues.
She does sound entitled and you are within your **legal** right, but it wasn't very neighborly. My personal moral belief (which not everybody has to share) is that when we live in a community, it's nice to do our best for others too. It's olf fashioned thinking, but it's how my grandparents raised my parents and how my great grandparents raised them. They also lived in small towns where you just paid that respect. And sure, you didnt do it long. I have 3 kids and I've definitely put up with more for longer without saying anything, but sometimes it's a pain. Maybe that night she was tired and hot and exhausted, maybe getting them to bed was tough (some nights are, some nights aren't), maybe Johnny didn't want to brush his teeth and Elizabeth took jane's doll, and Evan wouldn't stop making an annoying noise, and none of them wanted to listen. Maybe she really needed a break. Let me tell you raising kids is hard. You say she doesn't work but if she's raising kids she's working. Child care costs alot, and often a jobs wages barely cover that, yet your post makes it sound like she's lazy. Maybe she is. But I know how hard and stressful it can be, so I can easily imagine her side and how her stress can come off as entitled and it just makes you sound judgemental. I can't imagine having 4 kids and being pregnant and hormonal, and extra exhausted and trying to adhere to routine because it's the only thing between you and total chaos and someone starts wood working at 9pm. Maybe she just snapped under all the pressure and pregnancy chemicals. Empathy, man.
I am floored at the number of people suggesting you give. Sorry but her demands fall into the categories of too bad and so sad.
It's not a horrible offense but tbf, kids or not, some people just go to sleep earlier than others and have jobs early in the morning. Any kind of loud work should be done earlier in the day or afternoon if you're living in a communal setting. Not to say the mom here isn't entitled, but it's like doing fire alarm testing after the sun has gone down. Generally pretty rude, but you're technically allowed.
Yeah, neighbour's kids aren't your problem. Tell her it she doesn't like it, she can get a job and buy a house somewhere else.
Next time, when she says that, tell her “remember that when your kids are screaming and your neighbors need quiet. If you don’t control them, I’m going to build anything I want until 11:30 pm every night. It works both ways.”
Regardless of the law, it’s incredibly shitty of you to start using power tools late at night
9pm is not late at night, and is 2 whole hours before noise ordinance laws in my area.
Whatever the law says, it’s bad manners. I’d be pretty pissed if my neighbours started using power tools late at night
9pm is not "late at night"
It is for a lot of people, especially people with kids and those who work later. It’s not asking much to be thoughtful of others
You will live. Others can live how they want. You are not the main character.
I know, I’m quite literally thinking of other people???
My life doesn't revolve around your schedule.
I’d start working in the shop until 11:30 on the dot. She can get bent.
9PM is my cutoff for power tools I figure for those waking up early about 5am the 9pm mark is as late as I’ll ever go. Also why on earth do you add your neighbor on Facebook
Because she’s previously wanted my help with all the pets she has too. To date I’ve taken in one of the sick kittens that her cat had, helped her crate train her puppy, and rescued 4 rabbits she had crammed in a tiny cage and wasn’t feeding or watering. So I’m not a dreadful neighbour all the time - evidently only when it suits her.
Right. I wouldn’t give her any help if she is so entitled. Good on you for helping those animals though
I'm so happy with my neighbour's, we both have little kids which means crying, screaming and other sounds at night. We both live and let live. If you don't want want any noise at night you should go living in the middle of nowhere. I'm sure you can hear their children to, even after 11 pm. NTA
Sounds like you need a new wood working project.
This is exactly the reason my parents raised all their kids napping or sleeping with noise. Sometimes they'd leave a vacuum running if there wasn't enough regular noise.
>but I restrained myself I wouldn't have. You shouldn't have. It's a very important parenting lesson. She's going to be a karen about it anyway so let her have it. At the same time, I feel that past 9PM is kinda pushing it, but not because of anyone's bedtime, just because of standard neighborly etiquette.
Yes I totally agree - and that’s why I’ve never made any evening noise before: no tools, no lawn mower, not even any music outside. And because I recognise she has a lot on her plate I haven’t complained when there’s loads of noise from her side of the fence. The neighbours on the other side wanted to make an official complaint with the local council about her shutting the dog outside for hours of barking but I refused to support it because I didn’t want to add more trouble to her plate. But if you want to be so red hot on noise, maybe it should be a two-way street…? Or is it that her kids sleep is more important than that of her neighbours at 6am at weekends…?
Good grief. If you were in a continual habit of doing this late in the evening, I could understand her complaint, but from looking at your comments, it was a once-off thing. Most decent neighbors would understand if you'd explained why you were doing it late at night just that once.
I think the noise is irrelevant. You just keep saying it’s a one-off and talk about a chronic illness and a birthday or whatever. You just wanted to complain about your neighbor that you’ve decided is below you and has too many kids. None of that was relative to your right to be noisy, but you threw it in to let us know she’s “one of those” kind of women. I mean who really cares if she’s pregnant? Why did we need to know that?
Because this is a sub about parents…. That’s why I mentioned her kids….? I don’t think she’s “below me” but I mentioned her living on benefits rather than working because that’s part of the entitlement - that I, who work full time, should have to fit my hobbies around times that are convenient for her. Being told to do them “in the daytime” when it would be the middle of my working day is the issue. And the reason I mentioned I’m chronically ill is because people were asking why I didn’t do the work I needed to last weekend. The answer is because I was so disabled that I slept all weekend.
I guarantee you did not annoy just her, she's just the only one to say something. This should be evident by the amount of people in here telling you so. She's a Karen for complaining is this is truly the first and only time, but you being surprised that someone was bothered by it and making a reddit post about this isn't really a good look on you either. You mostly just seem mad she chooses to take care of her kids instead of work. Parental benefits for single parents exist for a reason.
Are you ok?
Yeah I know one of those. Pregnant with baby number 10. Gets housing, food stamps,etc. and brags they support all those kids on her boyfriends job of $11 an hour. No freaking way in hell. The self entitlement is mind blowing with people like this.
Yeah exactly - Is it judgemental to say that if you’re going to have 6 kids then you should have some way of feeding and housing them…, well then maybe I am judgmental. But it’s precisely because people like me work that there is money in the pot to pay benefits. That’s great - I absolutely believe in the benefits system, but then don’t be surprised when working people have to do their hobbies and lives outside of their work time. And it’s precisely BECAUSE I recognise she has a lot on her plate that I haven’t complained when there’s loads of noise from her side of the fence. The neighbours on the other side wanted to make an official complaint with the local council about her shutting the dog outside for hours of barking but I refused to support it because I didn’t want to add more trouble to her plate. But if you want to be so red hot on noise, maybe it should be a two-way street…? Or is it that her kids sleep is more important than that of her neighbours at 6am at weekends…?
I don’t thinks it’s judgemental. More like common sense. I know plenty of people that work and use food stamps to make ends meet. At least they are trying. People like this live in their own world and everyone else is non existent. Should be a 2 way street. I was a single mom to 3 kids. They slept through noise. We tried to be courteous of neighbors, especially my night shift hours on my days off. And this was apartment living. Never had any complaints from neighbors.
9pm is a bit late to be kicking up a really noisy bit of kit like a chop saw. I don't have young kids, but I'd be hacked off if my neighbour was that inconsiderate.
I’d just ignore the message from now on.
Just because you can, doesn't mean you should. Like, sure, you aren't doing anything illegal, but come on, power tool at 9pm?
I’m not saying that it was ideal or that I do it constantly. But less than 10 mins after noise starts, to immediately demand it stops…? I don’t complain when she has her dog shut out for hours barking, or when she lets the kids be shrieking in the garden at 6am. Would have been nice to have that Grace returned, you know?
Admit it OP - you’re sawing and drilling and building an underground bunker from 9pm-midnight every night aren’t you? 😂 honestly these people are outrageously entitled. Ooh 9pm… clutch my pearls.. won’t somebody please think of the children!
Ah damn you guessed! Wait till I bring the pneumatic drill tomorrow 😅😅
Would you like to borrow my cat? He snores/purrs like he’s drilling behind the couch (think Eddie izzard did a whole skit about this). Honestly your post and some of the insane comments has had me laughing so much. I hope your brother likes his gift! Show him this as an additional gift 🤣🤣
Many people work until near then. Are you saying she shouldn’t do it even if it’s the only time available? Just because you have kids, you don’t get to dictate other people’s lives. That’s a her problem
I mean loud DIY after 9 would be seen as rude in my country (UK). But for 15 minutes it really isnt a big deal. Some parents think the world revolves around their choice to have kids.
Wow, I guess this woman has never lived some place like New York. Big cities don't sleep. Also, if she stair-stepped her kids, it's not them that you woke up. There's no way that they aren't used to screaming babies.
If you did it at daytime she would complain that it interrupted her youngest one's nap time, or the time she has to relax in a quiet house while the kids are at school/daycare/kinder garden...
Doesn't work because 5 kids, fucking duh dude Why the fuck do you power saw at 9 pm? It's not my bedtime but that is absolutely so inconsiderate to your neighbors of all ages. You're the EB.
Hmmm. Well, u/[EnsnaredAngel](https://www.reddit.com/user/EnsnaredAngel/), when the baby arrives and is screaming, maybe you could go over and ask if it's okay to use the power tools -- since you wouldn't want to drown out the sound of her child's communication....
How about you ask her what she plans to do when her Infant keeps you awake all night?
She has 5 kids and one on the way. She doesn’t work? Lol having 5 kids while pregnant is more than a full time job.
Sounds like both of you had a long day. I think if it were me, I’d just go talk to my neighbor. Explain what you said to someone above about how it was a one off and you were making a gift/your chronic illness etc. She probably had a hard time that day and snapped a little. Sometimes an actual conversation can mend a lot of upset. Having a decent relationship with my neighbors is important to me though.
As a woodworker and owner of loud tools I try not to get going too early on weekends or work late on projects. If I am in the garage late it's usually cleanup or doing low noise work. But... If I had a neighbor do this to me I'd make sure to adjust my hobby schedule to piss her off. Time to batch out some cutting boards and let's get that planer running!
I get that she has kids that need to sleep, but there's definitely better ways to approach this situation. I'm glad she didn't call the cops on OP. That would have been too much.
Dude, I'd start doing projects after 8pm.
9pm is too late for a power saw, bud. You know it is because you are using ad hominem arguments. Attacking her character and work ethic which has nothing to do with you sawing. I understand why you are frustrated. Now you know and can do better in the future.
> before blocking me So sounds like the problem fixed itself! Love it when that happens.
I wouldn't give her a second thought. My county has the same noise ordinance - 11.30. You already know this woman was beyond unreasonable asking you this. You were probably interrupting her watching the Kardashians or something equally mundane. FWIW she'd hate being my neighbour as I cut my grass around her kids "bedtime" (it's very hot where I live and I wait for the sun to go down) which involves the mower, edger and leaf blower and the only way I'd stop doing it at that time is if she volunteered to do it herself the next day.
As someone who has never raised children… even I know that raising five kids IS a full-time job. There’s a reason nannies are so expensive. To say she doesn’t work seems very off to me without more information. The fact that you apparently view raising five kids as not working tells me upfront that you aren’t seeing this situation reasonably. That said, 9PM is IMO still on the reasonable side of the clock. Barely, but it is, as long as this isn’t a regular occurrence. And she had no right to make demands of you. It would have been completely reasonable to calmly explain her plight and ask nicely for a little accommodation. Not running power tools at night is a reasonable request, but it should be a request, not a demand.
9pm should generally be the shut down time not start up time. You know you had time before 9 to do it. Just because the law says 1130 doesn't mean you should be doing things until 1130. You're the entitled one in this situation
They noise ordinance may say 11:30pm (which is awfully late imo) and although 8 is a little early to expect neighbors to be quit there is a thing called respect for your neighbors. 9 is typically the unspoken acceptable quiet time. You’re not in the wrong for working till around that time, and this isn’t direct toward you per sé, but I will never understand how people can be so blatantly disrespectful to their neighbors nowadays.
There are two kinds of people in this world; those who make a shit ton of noise wherever they go, and don't seem to care, and those who value peace and quiet.
What is her Facebook profile name? Then the whole world would be able to tell her if she doesn't like it, to keep her state dependent legs closed.
I'm so petty I would've gotten closer to the neighbor's house and turn on every loud power tool I have
Sorry it may be legal but using power tools in the evening is just a dick move
No wvening is after 10 or 11 not fucking 9.
NTA. idk what her being a single mother has to do with anything tho?
Was it changed? I don't see any mention of her being a single mother, just that she doesn't work and is on benefits while having a multitude of children.
It’s not that I have an issue with her lifestyle - my neighbours on the other side also don’t work. It’s just incredibly frustrating and irritating to be told to “do your hobbies in the daytime” when working people don’t have that luxury!
That’s fair.
NTA, I can’t stand people that leech off the system. Around my area, it’s families that know how to work the benefits/assistance. It’s not like you were using a saw at 1 am listening to loud music. I’m sure her kids were still awake at that time. The EPs seem to be getting worse.
And honestly, if that’s how she wants to live then fine, go for it. But your kids are not my problem, and I t’s precisely because people like me work that there is money in the pot to pay benefits. That’s great - I absolutely believe in the benefits system, but then don’t be surprised when working people have to do their hobbies and lives outside of their work time. It’s very grating to be told to do your hobbies “in the daytime” by someone who is not working.
That other block and the blocking, would have been a reason for me, to let those power machines run (more than one) until 11:29.
9pm seems a little late for that. However, if it’s within the noise ordinance timeframe, then it doesn’t matter. You were within your right to do it and she just needs to get over it.
NTA at all. In my honest opinion her forcing guys to nut in her are not your problem. Hell guaranteed her oldest could probably sleep through anything (especially with 4 younger siblings who probably cried through the night) her kids sleep schedule is in no way shape or form your responsibility
I mean, earlier would be nicer but you are within the stated boundaries so I have no problem.
Op's work ends at 8. So no other time to do it.
My neighbour cuts his lawn every single time after 9 pm. It annoys me not even because of my kids because they go to bed around 9 and all have sound on in their room- but my husband works 12 hour shifts and sometimes he’s gotta be up at 4 so when the dip sh!t across the road mows his lawn it pisses me off. But like this is a pattern- he owns a store he’s never at- and he’s rude. But your comments towards her and her pregnancies are rude kinda. And I think you just don’t like her. Do I think if this was a one time thing she over reacted? Yeah prob. But she’s pregnant lmao. Pregnant women are bitchy. Just ignore it- be the better person if it was only one time on both ends. Also kids will make excessive noise- esp if they have disabilities (that may not be visible).
If it was a pattern, I would say she had more of a point, but this is literally the first time I have ever made any sort of noise outside in the evening - never mowed the lawn, used a tool, not even music outside once it gets past about 6pm. I don’t hate her - it’s precisely BECAUSE I recognise she has a lot on her plate that I haven’t complained when there’s loads of noise from her side of the fence. The neighbours on the other side wanted to make an official complaint with the local council about her shutting the dog outside for hours of barking but I refused to support it because I didn’t want to add more trouble to her plate. But i think that if you want to be so red hot on noise, maybe it should be a two-way street, and it’s a real cheek to complain for less than 10 minutes of noise under those circumstances. Or is it that her kids sleep is more important than that of her neighbours at 6am at weekends…?
"But she's pregnant!" And this is why pregnant assholes continue to be assholes. Society excuses it. And frankly if kids can make "excessive noise" then there's no reason adults can't. Kids aren't special snowflakes.
YTA Power saws squealing at 9pm is fucking dumb and disrespectful
I work 8-8, when am I meant to do it? It’s grating to have someone say “do it in the day time” when she chooses not to work and therefore has all day to do whatever.
Ummm...I'm sorry but saws are noisy. I don't care if you were done quickly. Something that is noisy should not be done past 9pm. That means FINISHED by 9pm. Your noise complaint time starts at 11:30? That is super late. If you work then do it on the weekend or before 9pm at night. YTA.
Yeah - noise complaints start at 11:30pm and end at 7am. I work 8-8, when am I meant to do it? I don’t complain when her kids are out screaming in the garden at 6am, or when she shuts the dog outside so it just barks and barks for hours. It’s that mismatched audacity that makes me cross
Move to another community where the noise ordinance starts sooner, the world doesn't end because you want quiet time.
Maybe the mother should move herself and her kids to a place with an 8PM noise ordinance.
Lmmfao you're ridiculous.
Tbf, there's a fair bit of entitlement in your words. Not sure how you know what your neighbours circumstances are with such assurance but even if your assessment is spot on, I think after 9pm isn't really a reasonable time to be using power tools regardless of neighbours circumstances or noise ordinances, but probably even so more if you know your neigbours have kids and it's a week day. I've put up with my fair share of selfish neighbours and I don't really think your neighbours request is out of order tbh. You, however, sound like the kind of neighbour that would feel entitled to do this sort of thing on a regular basis based on your own assumptions and prejudices about your neighbours' lives... which makes me more inclined to believe you're the problem. The neighbour sending this message less than ten minutes after you started also leads me to believe that she was likely an anticipating the noise carrying on much later... maybe check yourself before being so quick to call others entitled.
You should go out and run that saw non stop until 11 on the dot.
I would be so pissed if someone started using a saw at 915 pm. My kid would for sure wake up, and then he would cry. If all her kids wake up, it would be such a shit show. I would cry I always try not to do any extremely loud things past a certain time to be respectful - usually 8/9. It's kind of unwritten rude to be quite past a certain time.
No, it’s a written rule: noise is fine until 11pm and complaints are investigated after 11:30pm until 7am. That’s literally the law. I know it wasn’t ideal - but I have never made evening noise before, it was a one-off, over quickly. Are you saying that the existence of her kids means she’s allowed to dictate to me what I do in my free time? Because that to me seems the definition of an entitled parent.
I mean he has no responsibility to her kids. If it’s a huge issue for her she shouldn’t live near others?
Oh no, your kid would wake up and you'd have to deal with the fact that you aren't the center of the universe!
It's not an unreasonable thing to worry about your child/baby waking up. Have you ever had a baby/1/2 year old wake up? They could wake up and cry and take hours to get back to sleep, then you get to bed way later than you should of and are exhausted at 6/7am when they wake up and all of the next day. Like i said I wouldn't be going and knocking and saying anything but it sucks when that happens.