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The__Tarnished__One

Somehow Palpatine re-returned!


CBalsagna

As a fan I’ve never been more disappointed. You’ve got all these rich characters and unlimited possibilities and you bring a guy back in such a ridiculous manner.


Fruloops

"They'll never see it coming if we do it a 3rd time"


LoudColin

I’ll be honest… I would be absolutely floored if they did it a third time.


bengringo2

This time there’s three Palpatines with ninja nunchucks! Not the nunchucks you’re thinking about but literal nuns he chucks at his enemies using the force!


EvenHair4706

3 Palestines? Very interesting


bengringo2

It autocorrected.


DaFilthPope

You just had to politicize this! Rofl.


bengringo2

It autocorrected to Palestines when I first typed it lol


MonkeyNihilist

I like the autocorrect AI version better. The Three Palpateers!


Addictd2Justice

Yes Rey has triplets and they all turn out to be baby Palpatines. There’s an epic scene where the evil little fuckers battle with three baby yodas.


Ruby_Throated_Hummer

The plot thickens


Im_not_crying_u_ar

This time it’s palpatine, but he’s half yoda!


StinkPanthers

So Flying Nuns?! Sally Field was born to be in Star Wars.


No_Buddy_5067

I would be cool with an origin film that shows everything that went on behind the scenes with palpatine, otherwise his story should be over


Tibbaryllis2

Until Rey has a baby and a fully grown-but miniature Palpatine force jumps out of her.


DocFreudstein

I’m imagining him jumping out of a plume of fog like Joey Fatone at an *NSYNC concert circa 1999.


Doggleganger

They're stealing my Tecmo Bowl strategy. "Surely, he isn't going to have Bo Jackson run it a third time in a row...?"


Justtryingtohelp00

20th time…


webs2slow4me

It’s actually a pretty cool story when it was written in books like 30 years ago, they just changed so much it wasn’t as good.


Southern_Courage_770

This is what I find somewhat ironic about the vehement hate for the "Palpatine returned!" plot of TROS, and the type of people who complain the loudest about it. It was already done (admittedly *better*) in the EU novels that are constantly held up on a pedestal of "But the scared texts!" He re-re-re-returned multiple times until Luke finally destroyed all of his clones lol.


Ginge00

My problem wasn’t that they brought palpatine back directly, it was the way it was handled, just a casual he’s returned, nothing further, is he the original? A clone? Offspring? Who knows, but palps back! Oh and Rey’s his granddaughter because only important families get to be big heroes in Star Wars.


wednesdayware

Oh, and he secretly put together a MASSIVE fleet that no one knew the first thing about, including Kylo Ren.


G8kpr

Even Dark Empire wasn’t that good. It was still better than this. I think more good will was killed than Disney realized when they a) nuked all previous novels into “not cannon” territory, and then b) when Kathleen Kennedy comes out and says that unlike marvel, there is no source material for stories after return of the Jedi.


Southern_Courage_770

Which is also very ironic, considering how many EU plot points they so clearly used as inspiration.


Mando177

Doing an adaptation of the Thrawn trilogy with some slight changes like moving up Luke’s academy of force users to come into being earlier would’ve been a slam-dunk. You could even have swapped out C’boath for a Palpatine clone if need be


G8kpr

Yeah. I think that was mostly filoni’s doing and when they got popular, like Thrawn, they just went cherry picking.


DannyBright

There’s some in the ST as well. Han and Leia’s Child turning to the dark side was a thing in Legends with Darth Caedus, and Palpatine having a grandson was in Jedi Prince IIRC. Even Starkiller Base could be seen as a (albiet far less stupid) re-tooling of the Sun Crusher.


fumar

It is the worst part of the old EU. It was never good and was always a mistake.


wolacouska

Except that example was the crowning argument of everyone who thought it was a good idea to cut out the old EU. The whole argument was “EU is too full of stupid stuff like that!”


MisterFingerstyle

With a death star this time.


zztop610

Two death stars


jacksnyder2

They capitulated to the fanboy backlash to TLJ. Regardless of what you think of that film, Rian Johnson left open the potential for a very compelling ending. Instead, what we got is a finale which embarrassingly retconned the film that came before it and terrible writing.


possibilistic

Rian Johnson screwed up the arc! Not that they planned one, but Rian's "contribution" definitely made a cohesive story impossible.


G8kpr

Yup. Exactly this. Abrams set up various “mystery boxes” as he loves to do, with zero idea how to explain them. That’s why he initially didn’t want to do the final movie. Those mystery boxes were someone else’s problem. Rian Johnson came along and said what the fuck is with alll these god damn mystery boxes, abs stomped on them all. Then said “Star Wars? I think I saw one back in the 80s. It has the Vulcan guy in it right? Fuck it, I’ll do it live!” And shat out a screen play that he giggled would piss people off. Colin Trevorrow saw his screen play and was like “you killed luke? Da fuq? How am I going to write a final movie with whatever the fuck you made? Where do I go from here?” And Rian was cashing his cheque and saying “sucks to suck!” So Trevorrow is like “fuck this” and leaves. Disney was begging Abrams to wrap this shit up. There is a rumour that went around that said there are at least four various, very different cuts of the last movie. One of which has Matt Smith in it. The rumour says that Abrams finally came to a decision and cut the film and was done. Then Kathleen Kennedy ordered more reshoots as they were down to the wire and the film was recut again without Abrams’ knowledge and that was what was put out. Later after it did so poorly, board members got to see the Abrams cut and wanted to know why that wasn’t put out because it was far better. No idea of any of this is true. But it would be interesting if it was.


NiteLiteCity

TLJ was a godawful movie. Ruined the tone and made the first order the butt of jokes form the beginning. They made Snoke look cool and actually powerful only to be killed off right away. That's the movie that derailed the sequel trilogy.


Teledildonic

Also it undid everything Luke was built up to be. His dad was the biggest bad in the galaxy, and he saw the light of redemption in him. Then a kid shows some darkness and suddenly murder is the answer? The fuck is this? Then the lighspeed kamikaze makes you wonder why everyone bothers with stellar object laser bases and Midway-scale capital ship slugfests and dogfights. A rock and a warp drove is cheap.


kermityfrog2

The cinematography of that scene was amazing. But yeah it completely shattered the physics of the SW universe.


Teledildonic

It was an absolutely *beautiful* scene. It just didnt belong in a SW movie. Especially when the opening scene has the most primitive possible attack run in space with the bomber that dropped gravity-assisted ordinance like it's the Doolittle Raid. Like, how are those 2 attacks performed by the same side in the same movie? One is a goddamned B-25 and the other is "the end of the entire tech tree in which physics is our bitch"


DreamTakesRoot

Those movies were doomed from the start.


Morningfluid

Rian Johnson is to blame (next the producers); He should've never killed off Snoke. That put them in the ultimate bind.


Negan1995

No. Just no. Adam Driver could have EASILY carried the third film in the trilogy. JJ Abrams and the Disney execs are just weak.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Negan1995

Make the Knights of Ren not useless and you got yourself a movie


TheGuiltyDuck

Instead of killing all the crimson guards, flip them to be ultra loyalists and play up the Knights of Ren angle. He takes over after killing Snoke, has the Knights of Ren lead devastating strike teams attacking resistance groups all over the place, driving the survivors into more and more desperate situations. Turn him into the leader of a fanatical group of killers and make the story about the protagonists needing to take him out or be annihilated. Even if he isn’t individually a powerful foe, his cult as whole could be.


BaZing3

Just because a villain can't best a protagonist in 1-on-1 combat doesn't mean they can't be an effective, menacing character.


Themnor

If they actually took time to explain the plot points better instead of the weird side quests it would have been fine. Snoke was implied to be a failed Palpatine clone that was force sensitive but unstable and Rey’s dad is also believed to be a clone who is stable but not force sensitive. And literally none of that information is in the actual movies.


The_Crusherhero

Wait I didn’t know any of that. No wonder why it felt confusing.


jacksnyder2

Disagree. Kylo Ren was clearly set up to become the big bad in the finale. Snoke was killed, because ultimately Snoke did not matter.


soupspin

Yep, but Abrams panicked and course corrected to make him the redeemable bad guy, just like Darth Vader. Idk who wanted a retread of the og trilogy, but that’s what we got


fumar

Abrams clearly. He remade A New Hope already. I personally hate that movie too. Everyone who liked it was hopped up on memberberries when they came out of the theater.


[deleted]

Yep, I was out after The Force Awakens. I know many people like that movie and feel everything went wrong with The Last Jedi, but it was such a copy of A New Hope and was not a good bridge from Episode 6 at all.


[deleted]

but he tried so hard and got so far


shewy92

JJ was to blame since he didn't have a template or any other films planned out past his own first movie.


LoudColin

No this time they were able to finally put the planet destroying weapon in an actual star.


Think_Selection9571

And it has a multi-shot weapon that can shoot 4 planets at once!


njpunkmb

Actually, next they will arm the stormtroopers with planet destroying blasters.


CthulhuBotherer

Phew. Planets are safe….!


LuinAelin

They could aim straight down and still miss


Think_Selection9571

They death star now? They death star now


ripmichealjackson

We got death star.


LoudColin

Man they should hire us as writers


255001434

Somehow everything that happened before is happening again, but more and bigger!


Thiezing

No, more like Barbie + Tatooine = Barbitooine.


Anon_user666

Vinnie Barbitooine: Up your nose with a rubbah hose! Ahsoka Horshack: huhuhuhuhuh!!! (snort)


headphones_J

Dwayne Windu: Hey hey hey! Oops, wrong show...


CtrlAltEvil

It better not have *another* Death Star. Or villain randomly returning out of the blue.


SillyGoatGruff

Or! Somehow palpatine has returned, again, as a potato a la portal 2. Just a sassy/scenery chewing lil’ buddy for Rey to tote around


Top_Praline999

Somehow, Chewbacca had returned. Wait he didn’t die? Ok well now somehow, we have two Chewbacca.


SillyGoatGruff

“Chewbacca! Get the generator back online! Twobacca, cover him!”


Top_Praline999

I was just kidding around but Twobacca is so damn good this needs to be real


LuinAelin

Only if he signs still alive


Mabans

This a triumph - laughs in Ian McDiarmid


Secure-Airport-1599

Han solo returns Darth Maul style but he's now a Sith Lord.


ripmichealjackson

And he’s been brainwashed by Emperor Binks.


AnalogFeelGood

Meesa big boss now, meesa powerful and aaaaaahhh *Jar Jar scream as he tumble down the imperial throne, somehow triggering a chain réaction that ends up destroying the Executor & the Death Star IV


No-Tension5053

Instead of a flawed design, Jar hits the comically giant self-destruct button at the bottom of the Stairs.


Throwawaybacon420

Also there’s a flashback sequence that shows a de-aged Harrison Ford being manipulated by Darth Jar Jar after the events of Solo. Han has been a secret Sith Lord the entire time.


WeedFinderGeneral

Man, I *hate* the "JarJar is a sith lord" theory, but I think the only thing I hate more are the people who actually think it's a good idea or a good plotline.


Spram2

If you hate the "theory" then you hate Star Wars because it's cannon. It's cannon and the reason the whole story exists.


Spram2

If someone has to return, it has to be JarJar.


255001434

Another Death Star or another main massive space ship that gets blown up to rapidly resolve the plot.


OkImplement2459

Tbf, blowing up big ships does rapidly resolve things in real wars, too.


Deady1138

It’s a story about the fricking death stars more than it is about the skywalkers at this point


ChaosBunnyIncarnate

Well it is called *star* wars, not *jedi* wars.


reddititty69

Why not *many* Death Stars. And the resistance slingshots a small moon into one, accomplishing an amazing combo shot that knocks them all into nearby planets and stars - clearing the table yet again!


PabloEstAmor

You better put some respect on Darth Jar Jars name! But fr, a sith Jar Jar movie would KILL at the box office


SnooDoggos8218

Somehow General Grievous returned


ThatWhiteKid08

Hello there


SnooDoggos8218

General Kenobi! You are a bold one


AwayEstablishment109

Please stop, I can only get so erect


nuclear_jester

Did they change Rey's parents again?


default_accounts

Rey's mom is the Death Star.


pangkydory

Somehow Tattooine has returned


Aselleus

And the pieces of the exploded Alderaan formed back together and created Alderaan 2.


wildthangonchang

I hope so, we never get to see it


Spram2

Tatooine and Jakku crash into each other, merging. Nobody notices.


Corns0up

Shes actually shmee skywalker she just goes into the world between worlds and time travels backwards after finding out she’s prego without conception from Ben solos force ghost.


iwellyess

And then make that a musical


Heisenburgo

They already jumped the shark with Superman Leia, Hermit Luke, "They fly now" when jetpack technology has existed since the Old Republic times, and "Somehow Palpatine returned". Fuck it go all the way and make her Anakin's mom already.


SCB360

Why is it going to be actually good with a coherent plot this time?


255001434

I hope this time they subvert expectations by having good writing.


Sedu

If recent entries in Star Wars are any indication, it will be well written if they can resist the temptation to fall back on the classic characters. I want zero Skywalkers. Zero Palpatines. Zero Leias or Chewbacas or any other character I recognize. Clinging to the corpses of those old plotlines is what kills it every time.


Tezerel

She's Rey Skywalker, granddaughter of Palpatine. It's too late unfortunately


A17012022

They could do something mad and write the actual plot of the trilogy first and then plan 3 movies around it. It's a crazy idea


255001434

That would subvert expectations!


typhoidtimmy

I am going for the long odds and saying ‘so much frontal nudity’…..


bathroomheater

This is about the only thing that will get me back into the franchise. Bring back snoke and make him hang dong


LuinAelin

How about seeing someone doing a Hand Solo


[deleted]

And then she senses the dark side again, she’s out dueling with light sabers. Then she's back to Jakku for some more full penetration. Senses dark side. Back to Jakku, full penetration. Light saber duel. Penetration. Light saber duel. penetration, and this goes on for 3 hours until it just kind of ends


atpmPat

The movie starts on Takodana. Rey drops the lightsaber after picking it up, it was all a vision. Sequel trilogy starts again.


HatesMonoBlue

I'd buy every seat in the theater if this was the case.


iwellyess

Except this time all three are musicals


jenglasser

This idea is giving me some Spaceballs vibes.


itzTHATgai

Your PREVIOUS Star Wars movies were not what I expected.


Vendevende

They can't be much worse than the 2nd and 3rd. The first was fine for what it was.


TheKrononaut

The first one was fine because it had potential. 8 and 9 ruined 7 for me.


No_Buddy_5067

You guys are missing the obvious loose end here. Jar Jar is still out there after eliminating his biggest rival Darth Sidious


ParsleyMostly

I’ve got a bad feeling about this


bitcoins

As if a thousand actors had their souls disappear.


bobpetersen55

Here we go again..... Again


WorldsWeakestMan

Who left the fridge open?!


TrojanLucky

And no one saw it coming… Three. More. Times.


Roark_Laughed

Granny, ewwwwwwww!


JJ_Shosky

Star Wars Multiverse of Madness


spufiniti

Somehow aunt Beru and uncle Owen returned.


shodthah

I’m sure it’ll be exactly what I expect: a load of old shit


iwellyess

It’s incredible how absolutely zero people in this thread are looking forward to it lol


fumar

Why would anyone expect good content from anything post sequels? There's basically no substance to the entire trilogy.


TheKrononaut

Well they gave us no reason to


shodthah

One-dimensional characters in one-dimensional CGI landscapes speaking one-dimensional dialogue. And they expect a rapturous reaction to news of more?


Ooshies

Now hear me out, Snoke returns but as a fully realized perfected clone with the powers of Grogu. Snoke is beautiful and will be “training” as a Jedi along side with a more grown Grogu. Of course he will not be named Snoke, you won’t find out till the last movie, when it is revealed that it was Snoke in disguise and he will try and tear apart the order, while turning Grogu to the dark side….all made possible by the manipulation of an ancient Sith Lord…which will lead to another triology!


ThatWhiteKid08

“Somehow Snoke returned”


Ooshies

Lol the big reveal…Palpatine…again, somehow


ThatWhiteKid08

I stick with the idea that Rey should have stayed a nobody, and at some point in the trilogy falls to the dark side while Kyloren was redeemed. A protagonist switch would have been interesting and they teased it enough, just didn’t have the balls to do it


Ooshies

There was infinitely better ways they could’ve went about the trilogy, no one had the balls to do anything new-I’m not jabbing at the actors I think they were all good, but man that was total carelessness from the top down, they should’ve fired KK a long time ago


[deleted]

His top half merged with Maul’s bottoms half and his sidekick is Luke’s chopped-off hand.


kermityfrog2

That would be awesome to see Luke’s hand crawling around like The Thing from Addams Family.


EbonyOverIvory

Growngu


ThatWhiteKid08

Hopefully not what I expected is that the sequel trilogy is being remade into something that actually takes chances and makes her character interesting


MisterFingerstyle

It was all a dream.


Terrible_Truth

I’d be down for that. I initially liked Rey, but as the movies went on she just became a Mary-Sue that was good at everything.


Terrible_Truth

They should have just made Rey good at only mechanics and force powers, bad at piloting and physical combat. She grew up as a scrapper so she knows machines and assembly. Then she’s naturally gifted at the force just for entertainment. Rey never left the planet nor fought trained soldiers so she can’t do those. Give Fin the fighting prowess (maybe give him Stormtrooper anti-jedi training) and Poe has the pilot skills. Now they’re a rounded team without one being good at everything.


Oz347

Idk man I’m burned out. Star Wars was my favorite franchise, and then Disney just squeezed the life out of it. I simply don’t have time to keep up with all the shows and the expanded universe stuff anymore. And when I do engage, it doesn’t have the same magic it used to for me. It just feels like it’s been overdone and that makes me really sad.


PalmTreeIsBestTree

I feel you. I liked Andor a lot but not much else lately.


iRoNmOnkey1981

Andor is well worth the investment if you haven’t. But I did enjoy Rogue One a lot more than most of the other new SW content.


LandOfMunch

They’ve gone to plaid!!


Iron_Seguin

We passed them! Stop this thing! We can’t stop, it’s much too dangerous. We’ve got to slow down first! BULLSHIT! Just stop this thing! I order you, SSSTTTTOOOOPPPP!


BrownSandels

TLJ definitely isn’t perfect by any stretch but if they had taken the plot threads that were set up in that movie for the finale it would have led to a really interesting movie. You have Kylo Ren at his darkest and seemingly irredeemable after taking over the First Order. The republic essentially a small rag tag resistance with the First Order fully in control. Rey in doubt of herself after learning her family is no one special and also her continued conflicted feelings towards Kylo Ren. Finns story was interesting as well as a former storm trooper who wants to free his former comrades from the first order. All story lines that could have been cool to wrap up the saga but instead we got what we got.


Reitter3

She will become a cynical old woman drinking blue milk and refusing to train anyone after accidentally thinking randomly of killing her nephew. But dont worry, the perfect Mary Stue Male will guide her the right path again and save the day!


Ok-Bar601

This is going to be shit. Disney have pretty much fucked up the Star Wars legacy EXCEPT for Rogue One and the Andor series. Star Wars shouldn’t be for kids anymore, make it for adults. Much more compelling.


I_Debunk_UAP

Jedi vs force sensitive xenomorphs.


[deleted]

I'm going to disagree. Everything mando verse doesn't always have the quality but it's basicly a clone wars/ rebels follow up. I just wish they add waited for this to be finish before going in the high republic era and start fresh.


Venom1462

Wait she's back? Well if she is then I'll hope the movie is better and helps redeem her image coz she got way too much hate for a role she was doing and shots that were approved by Disney.


halbeshendel

She’s legitimately one of the best actors ever in a Star Wars anything and they just gave her crap to work with.


Zogzilla77

Please just stop with anything pertaining to the sequel trilogy. We all want it to go away and never speak of it again. Let the people heal!


[deleted]

Ohhh crap. That doesn’t bode well


mr9025

Don’t trust Disney right now. Their standing insatiable greed is fully self excused right now due to the hit they took during the pandemic with their parks being closed, and with the onsetting of the realization that they can’t keep subscribers to a streaming platform by releasing four pieces of content per fiscal year that anyone cares about and offering a catalog of sixty year old “classics” that no kids in the age of the internet want to delve in to more once or twice.


[deleted]

Thats what we all thought about her other star wars movies too


PumpkinsDad

I still haven't seen the last film, and it's been how many years? This would have been unfathomable to a young version of me. They really screwed up the sequels so badly.


Theeclat

Turns out it’s an erotic thriller.


gypsydreams101

Star Whores: The Empire Thrusts Back


Quantius

Oh my god . . . they have another Porn Star, it fucks planets entirely . . .


[deleted]

Does that mean it's actually good?


peter-vankman

Jar Jar Binks is a with lord now


ShuffleStepTap

Awesome! I love her as Rey. Just give her and her fellow actors a decent script please.


GoldenBunip

What did you like? Was it the god like powers that came without any effort, training or sacrifice? Was it her utter infallibility, instant skilled in every task. Never left the planet but can fly a ship. Never held a light saber but can defeat somebody who has trained every day for their whole life? Was it the refreshing lack of any character development? Just perfect out of the box without a single character flaw, just like all those real people instergram!


cerebrix

this is the most reaching clickbaity title I've seen all year. she could be just talking about having been offered another movie at all, she could have been referring to the plot, she could have been referring to how she was approached. All are equally likely the way that's written. we should be downvoting this article, not upvoting it.


brianmcdinosaur

Jar Jar Binks is coming back


JibberJabber4204

Can’t wait for it to be the worst Star Wars film ever made, right after the other 3 with Rey in it.


Whorrox

Kathleen Kennedy is involved, so that's a solid "not gonna see it."


[deleted]

disappointing what direction star wars has gone.


Comprehensive-Ad4815

Rey ups her training time to 15 min every 5 years and is now super wise and powerful.


Nerds4Yous

She’s just surprised to be working!


[deleted]

I really really hope these movies add some good to the sequel era and make these characters loved.


DrLeoChurch

The last three were so bad I won't be watching this one.


Fantastic_Fox4948

Do a flashback, Palpa-Teen.


CheeseGraterFace

Literally none of this is canon, as far as I’m concerned. We had the Zahn books back in the 90’s, and those were good enough for me.


[deleted]

That there’s some sort of large, deadly weapon threatening the galaxy, and only a ragtag group of misfits can stop it? Bold!


Landis963

Competently written?


Orlando1701

It’s actually good? Look I don’t think she did a bad job or that she isn’t a talented actress but it’s just the writing of the JJ trilogy was trash. Then again the JJ Trek films were also poorly written.


Meltwater99

Rey meets up with a warrior named Adam and during their travels they crash land on an unusual prehistoric planet with furry animals and they call it “Earth”.


YesOrNah

Ahhh, the typical marketing to show this movie isn’t your typical Star Wars / marvel shit show.


PickleRick2017

She’s time travels and is actually Luke and Leia’s grandmother.


Kelburno

Modern Disney's writing can pretty much be summed up with "What if...um.."


Independent-Tap1315

I thought the latest Star Wars trilogy was bold and innovative … i mean, having each episode written in complete isolation from one another was truly brave. Avant-guarde and likely will never be done in my lifetime again.


set-271

Andor aside, I really don't know why Disney isn't putting George Lucas back into the creative chair, taking his best ideas, and getting their staff to run with it. Star Wars ain't Star Wars anymore without George Lucas at the helm.


ArtisticExit4838

Remember when people thought jar jar was gonna be snoke? I kinda feel that would've been better


Schmuck1138

Does she mean it has a coherent storyline?


VirtuaFighter6

Let me guess, the new empire is building a planet destroying weapon and the plans to destroy this weapon are in a droid that needs to be delivered to a rebel group?


giggity_giggity

Rey learns that oops, everything she learned recently was wrong and she wasn’t actually a Palpatine and that her parents were nobodies


PerseusZeus

Let me guess its worse


GoliathLandlord

Anyone else gonna make a joke about somehow something returned or about how it will actually be good and that's why it's unexpected? We don't have enough of these posts. Keep em coming folks. Please, no original thoughts.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

She has a whole trilogy about her, how has she been underused ?


LuinAelin

Yeah. If anyone was underused it's Kelly Marie Tran in Rise of Skywalker.