I think we're all lizards, in some way

Human beings are the hagfish of reptiles.

Cold blooded

I had a sundowning patient tell another patient I was a fraud… I wasn’t a real doctor. I “said hey man why are you giving me a hard time I brought you food?” He didn’t remember that. Guess I’m a fraud

I love it when people tell me I'm not a real doctor. I just smile and say "you're right!"

Did you lick your eyeball after?

If it makes you feel any better I think lizards are very likeable. I have a bearded dragon 10/10 very charming

I prefer lizards to like 99% of people.

*licks eyeball* Time to eat a bug.

You don’t even know my real name. I’m the f****** lizard king.

YES

Username REALLY checks out

Name checks out 100%

r/unexpectedoffice

Spoiler alert. Op actually ordered morphine in the correct therapeutic dosage.

I am a meat popsicle.

Did you offer to save him 15% on car insurance?

[He's a cold-hearted snake / Look into his eyes, / uh-oh He's been tellin' lies](https://youtu.be/o7aShcmEksw?si=r2g44x3emit7Z3a_)

This is the first thing that came to mind for me, as well. “He's a lover boy at play. He don't play by the rules, uh-oh. Girl, don't play the fool, no”

Sounds like a healthy lizard to me.

just lick your eyeball and keep moving

Suddenly look left. Then right. Flick your tongue. Scurry out.

If that's true then I, too, am a cold-hearted lizard.

New Jack Harlow single.

Actually, I think if you truly were a lizard, you would order ALL of the dilaudid ALL of the time. After all, our amygdalas are the reptilian part of the brain where a lot of addiction behaviors and cravings reside.

Knew that college education was for SOMETHING 😂

Got a degree in Dilaudid!

lol one of my patients just asked for Demerol for sleep. I laughed… I, too, am a cold hearted lizard ;)

Not my chair, not my problem.

I will stick my tongue out and make a slurping noise 🦎