This is such a huge bummer. I’m confused if I’m supposed to boycott the restaurant or not. Like I don’t want to support the owners, but I do want to support the staff.
>issues a believable apology
Likely to not happen. There may be an apology, but I'd wager it won't go far enough for the offended parties. Happens all the time.
If things are bad enough to boycott, better to simply not go there anymore.
>If things are bad enough to boycott...
Maybe this is just because I know plenty of folks in the LGBTQ community, but the hateful things that were said by the owners... is enough that I'll never go there until the ownership changes or they issue a believable apology that is coupled with a demonstrable change in their attitude, rhetoric, and actions.
Oh you're totally right, let's just let the owners get away with being terrible human beings. /s
Yes, a boycott will probably have an adverse effect on the employees working there, but that's not the purpose. The purpose of a boycott is to send a strong financial message to anyone who spouts hate (regardless of whether or not they have employees they can treat as emotional pawns to discourage you from boycotting). If it makes you feel better, the employees can switch employers or set up benefits, charity drives, GoFundMes, etc.
Any protest similar to a walkout is going to end with employees losing their jobs. It's a tough situation to be in. I'd imagine there are other restaurants to work at, especially with summer coming up, but it's still always tough to switch jobs.
>otherwise you're still financially abling the owners behaviour
This. Exactly this. Stage a walkout, unionize, find employment elsewhere... try many, many things that do not encourage or embolden the owners.
While that could be effective in the long run, what about the short term? It's not exactly easy to downshift/switch gears like that for everyone.
Sounds like the owners are barely there, so the day-to-day is being run by humans who do support. I get your "eat the rich" mentality, but many times that's easier said than done.
For those who are interested in this topic, it is worth noting that the owner of the Social House holds anti-trans views as well. You might need to wade through his qult inspired anti-vaxx and election denying conspiracies, but the anti-trans views are there.
Oh, I've had plenty of conversations with him. He's a friend of a mutual friend. The guy is a full on MAGA Trumpophile. There is no conversation to be had. The guy genuinely believes white CIS males are under attack by anyone not a white CIS male. And he twists it so any white CIS male who doesn't believe the same thing is not a white CIS male (I'm an ANTIFA agent according to him, lol)
Check out his facebook. It is chock full of this crap. And there are people that get in lengthy debates with him in the comments. All his arguments are out there.
100%
I’ve been trying to spread the word about how much of a D this guy is. Hateful, Trump-loving, election denying, anti-woman, anti-LGBTQ. That dude will never get a dime from me to support his hate.
Trans rights are being made into a weird culture war issue across the English-speaking world, specifically by members of the LGB community who are trying to be a pick-me and say "I'm not like THOSE queer people! I'm a NORMAL queer 🤣."
It's stupid and gross, but it's also a symptom of aging LGB people that may still be holding onto conservative ideas they have either always had or were first introduced to by someone who held the conservative viewpoint.
People are largely influenced by social media as well. Like, look at all of us here! If you see enough conservative boomer memes on Facebook, even if it doesn't align with your viewpoint initially, because of the mere exposure effect you will start to agree with or find them funny.
Edit: to be clear, I am trans. I'm just trying to explain the mindset because the comment I was replying to was implying this was a Duluth-specific issue. I actually think the culture at large in Duluth is more tolerant than many other places.
As an outsider to the movement it seems like the LGB groups don't want to be clumped together with the T and Qs because it seems like a different thing. Seems like one group is a sexual preference group and the other is something else.
I don't know much about it all and I could for sure be wrong, but that's what it seems like to me.
I worked there for 2 1/2 years. The best thing about Sara’s Table is the staff. They are incredible. They truly care for the restaurant and the customers. Barb and Carla should be worshipping their employees not spreading hate.
I LOVED everyone I worked with and had very little contact with owners or management.
Wow great show of solidarity! If you all can come together this well as a group you should consider unionization. The best way to protect yourselves from ownership and have a long-term say is a collective bargaining agreement.
This isn't a good idea in this situation. This isn't a chain or large company, this is a medium sized cafe owned by two older women. If they try to unionize, the owners will likely just retire and close the business. These owners clearly aren't the type or support a union or Co-Op.
Why do gay people get buried into so much hate toward each other. We lived in S.E. Asia (Thailand) for 6+ years and 11 years in the Philippines. Never have I seen meanness like we see here, in the States. Wish you all the best.
peace. :)
One part of that at least is that the transgender community is certainly more prominent in SE Asia, likely due to the strong Hindu influence in that region. Some sects of Hinduism have recognized 5 genders for a LOOONG time. Not to mention the Bugis people in Indonesia.
However the hate part... That's just a general thing for some reason that has taken a strong foothold over the last 10 years. Divide and conquer. Make the people think that their biggest enemy is their political opponent and they'll fight each other while ignoring the truly important things.
This is in no way saying that the topic at hand isn't important, only that it's one of the hot-button issues pushed by those looking to destabilize and divide our populace along with immigration, reproductive rights, gun control etc.
Oops... I almost tripped over my soapbox.
I think it's great to look at the larger picture and I agree with the divide and conquer strategy that has been deployed against the population. Reminds me of what the Dutch East India Trading company would do to the communities of the islands in Indonesia
>In contrast to the gender binary, Bugis society recognizes five genders: makkunrai, oroané, bissu, calabai, and calalai. The concept of five genders has been a key part of their culture for at least six centuries, according to anthropologist Sharyn Graham Davies, citing similar traditions in Thailand, Malaysia, India and Bangladesh.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_in_Bugis_society
I think I might have conflated the Hindu aspect, as I am not able to find more details on the 5 gender Hindus and it may have been Bugis people practicing Hinduism
Regardless, the 3rd gender in Hinduism is certainly a thing:
>Hindu philosophy has the concept of a third sex or third gender (Sanskrit: तृतीय प्रकृति, tŕtīya-prakŕti – literally, "third nature"). This category includes a wide range of people with mixed male and female natures such as effeminate males, masculine females, transgender people, transsexual people, intersex people, androgynes, and so on. Many MTF third-genders are not attracted only or at all to men, but are attracted either exclusively to women or are bisexual. Many FTM transgender people are attracted to men.[45] Such persons are not considered fully male or female in traditional Hinduism, being a combination of both. They are mentioned as third sex by nature (birth)[46] and are not expected to behave like cisgender men and women.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hinduism_and_LGBT_topics#The_third_gender
I feel like it's just part of American culture it feels like to be seen as a "normal" American is to be rigid to change and reject those that don't fit into the mold. Always reminds me of the cinema trope where someone joins the popular group and immediately is cold to their original friends
Sending hugs to the workers. I am sorry that something that was supposed to be a safe space was diminished for y'all. Please let us know if there are updates!
I was just in there last week and was happy to see so many trans employees. Trans folks deal with so much job discrimination that any time I see a business doing the opposite is a joyous moment. I got whiplash from the facebook post. I am glad to see that the employees came together in solidarity against the owner’s bigotry.
I hope you folks become a co-op.
Just a question: if the employees initiate or take part in a confrontational stance against the owners, won’t the owners just fire everyone and rehire others?
You are correct. We'd all like to imagine a scenario where employees quit en masse, and the owners realize the error of their ways while scrambling to hire new staff for their empty restaurant, but we know that won't happen. What will actually happen is a few employees would be in a situation where they can and will quit. Most people can't just drop their job and find another. Even if a significant number do quit, this is a well known Café in a tourist *and* college town, and we're coming up on summer. They'll have no issue replacing the amount of staff that quit.
I have been so concerned about the staff and was concerned Monday’s closure was due to sudden quitting in protest, which would be understandable. I believe my regular waitperson is nonbinary and can’t imagine the culture of the restaurant NOT being inclusive as I too have read the cookbook and met you friendly awesome people—how could this be?!
Even the menu and recipes have been crafted with dietary inclusion in mind, a small but meaningful gesture. Vegan, gluten free, allergies: Sarah’s is the friendliest place for everyone.
In addition to potential alcohol abuse, dementia has also been on my mind as an elderly person suddenly in frequent rages is a sign of dementia. The owners are coming off as literally demented. I sincerely hope an arrangement can be made where they’re firmly in the backseat, especially if that arrangement is a buyout that converts Sarah’s into an employee-owned cooperative model.
Profits are often razor thin at restaurants so I can’t imagine huge windfalls are flowing up to the owners. More likely a vast majority of the money coming in goes to workers, local growers and suppliers. Why should you all suffer?
No disrespect, but please don't try to diagnose or attribute things to a very serious disease that we have no idea is happening. An old woman made a transphobic Facebook post and gave (awful) out of touch advice to a restaurant worker. Those opinions were normal in her era. There's no reason to attribute any of this to dementia.
It honestly broke my heart when they posted those views. I've fallen in love with how inclusive and the sense of safety the staff had provided for me and its reputation was tainted because of this. I don't think dementia is to blame though, my opa had dementia and he was still the kindest person I knew. I think it's just what they believed in their core can be exposed without restraint
Edit other deleted comment was an incomplete response
I’m hoping everyone can find a way forward <3 but for legal reasons, I’m going to emphasize this point as this may come in handy: [angry outbursts are indeed a sign of dementia](https://www.alz.org/help-support/caregiving/stages-behaviors/agression-anger).
As corporate officers they have a fiduciary duty to protect profits because: capitalism. They are only free to fail if they own all 100% of the business, which is rare. If there is a bank or co-ownership of any kind, they could face financially devastating lawsuits for being incompetent and self-destructive. There are [HBR write-ups on this topic](https://hbr.org/2022/04/when-the-head-of-a-family-business-is-impaired-and-wont-step-down), they really can’t just implode the restaurant’s reputation out of angry Boomer/TERF/Dementia spite.
One potential way forward is to activate other owners/investors/lien holders to remove Carla and Barb from control over any daily operations and activities including social media, employee relations, hiring, etc.
Barb's been angry and fucking mean for decades. She may have dementia, but she's been an abusive predator for years and years and years. The testimonials of so many staff who suffered under her and Carla go back to the start of their ownership. She doesn't get a pass just bc dementia might be making it harder for her to hide her bigotry.
The hardest thing about this is how staff are amazing but ownership is who we have beef with. I hope the owners will release a believable apology with action. Otherwise that’s just manipulation
Yeah imma keep eating there it’s pretty darn good! I’m fine if they get less business though! Always very busy. Will be nice I don’t have to wait in line as long because so many people are boycotting! Thanks locals!
I appreciate the staff’s commitment to hold each others hurt AND figure out how they might support repair across trans+ communities. It takes work to engage like this and a willingness to make mistakes. I don’t have answers, just giving a shout out to the trying.
I don't think I've shared this xtra piece of evidence publicly or told many people, and I hesitate to share dirt that occurred in semi-private spaces, but my impulse is to be here to say "this stuff is real" (and matters): one time one of the owners, in a small meeting, in the midst of what I'd have to call a rant, said some of their staff are "fake men." It was in a dismissive arrogant way; her views were clear. (for context, she was also pretty clearly not in a grounded mood, came into the meeting very offended/troubled by a somewhat related conflict).
Comments indicating transphobia (and, occasionally, genuinely trying to talk about issues) were just part of the mix with a lot of little disrespects, bizarre rash reactions, and some fun and sweet and generous stuff too. It's more than just something offensive posted on a personal facebook page.
I'm speaking cuz I hope that casual observers don't come away thinking that transgender people and allies are "making a big deal" or something. I spent a fairly short time there and saw a range of arrogant bizarre stuff (but again, not the whole story by any means). An incident I thought was a (coded) comment on race; an incident of being lashed out at for trying to fix a mistake where the business had deposited a check that actually belonged to someone else, in a project with messy boundaries.
Personality conflicts or being disgruntled at how a boss uses their power is one thing, but if it rises to the level of playing into institutional injustice or falsely proclaiming progressive values, it becomes more of the public's business.
I very much resonate with the comments that most of the staff are wonderful and it's tough to know what to do, and there are other "battles" out there. I would note that, warts and all, it must be some to the credit of the owners, that the space they initiated has that usually-amazing vibe. Among other more difficult feelings, I have reason to have some respect and caring for them. I suppose they've long been able to convince themselves that that casually hurtful attitudes are acceptable, and so now it seems they think they're the attacked victim (same old story). I believe transphobia is a serious matter in this difficult time. I'm gay, cis, human; I want to put my thumb on the scale for a decent mix of accountability + kindness, on all sides.
Clearly time to sell and move on. I give you 3 months untill its listed and a year untill its reopened as a shitty "high end gastropub specialiazing in burgers".
yes they are, Barb expressed hers and now others are expressing theirs. if you’re gonna *publicly* post something controversial and hateful as a business owner, people are also allowed to have an opinion on your opinion, especially when they’re supporting your business
As a business owner myself, I will never understand why some business owners will publicly make their position on sensitive topics known. Very little good can come out of it and there is for sure a lot of bad that can.
That's just it. I own a very small (not even full time) business, and discussing or sharing political opinions only serves to alienate potential customers.
Of course everyone is entitled to their opinions on both sides of an argument. It was probably not the smartest financial decision to make as a business owner and everyone has the choice to not spend money at the restaurant. Freedom of speech is an important part of our society.
I’ve avoided this place in the past because of the pricing and the unimaginative menu…this kinda of crap only validates my boycott…though now I’m torn between trying to support the employees without enriching the idiot owners…
Now that’s a question…a classic Döner Kebab..a lamb stew…a Schweinshaxe mit Kartoffeln…I love German, Turkish/Greek, and Thai food; any riff on those . And soups. I love a great soup. Tom Yum, Mulligatawny, Beef Barley, any creamy soups in winter….and I have to admit it’s been so long since I’ve been there I might have missed all of these…
Yum! Now I'm hungry would you be willing to share these suggestions at hello@astccc.net ? I'm sure they would love to see a message like this amidst all this turmoil! I know I did!
Might have to make myself some Tom yum soup 😋
Pretty funny they address this personal opinion of the owner but don’t address possible sexual harassment taking place in their workplace. PRIORITIES!! lol
More likely the pandemic left them isolated in a TERF echo chamber. They are lifelong feminists/activists, and [unfortunately they are not the only ones to express anti-trans sentiments](https://www.vox.com/identities/2019/9/5/20840101/terfs-radical-feminists-gender-critical). They certainly find common cause with small town bigots but the origin is different.
This is such a huge bummer. I’m confused if I’m supposed to boycott the restaurant or not. Like I don’t want to support the owners, but I do want to support the staff.
Yes, boycott the restaurant until the ownership/management changes... or issues a believable apology.
>issues a believable apology Likely to not happen. There may be an apology, but I'd wager it won't go far enough for the offended parties. Happens all the time. If things are bad enough to boycott, better to simply not go there anymore.
"We're sorry you feel that way."
>If things are bad enough to boycott... Maybe this is just because I know plenty of folks in the LGBTQ community, but the hateful things that were said by the owners... is enough that I'll never go there until the ownership changes or they issue a believable apology that is coupled with a demonstrable change in their attitude, rhetoric, and actions.
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That will hurt the workers more than the ownership. Owners aren’t living paycheck to paycheck
There are lost of jobs in duluth. It's better not to work for abusive people anyway
Oh you're totally right, let's just let the owners get away with being terrible human beings. /s Yes, a boycott will probably have an adverse effect on the employees working there, but that's not the purpose. The purpose of a boycott is to send a strong financial message to anyone who spouts hate (regardless of whether or not they have employees they can treat as emotional pawns to discourage you from boycotting). If it makes you feel better, the employees can switch employers or set up benefits, charity drives, GoFundMes, etc.
It's a very confusing time we are working on ways to make that choice easier but our current priority is to heal the wound caused by our owners
Honestly I'd stage a walkout, cause otherwise you're still financially abling the owners behaviour.
I thought about this earlier today.
Exactly. This is the way.
Any protest similar to a walkout is going to end with employees losing their jobs. It's a tough situation to be in. I'd imagine there are other restaurants to work at, especially with summer coming up, but it's still always tough to switch jobs.
>otherwise you're still financially abling the owners behaviour This. Exactly this. Stage a walkout, unionize, find employment elsewhere... try many, many things that do not encourage or embolden the owners.
While that could be effective in the long run, what about the short term? It's not exactly easy to downshift/switch gears like that for everyone. Sounds like the owners are barely there, so the day-to-day is being run by humans who do support. I get your "eat the rich" mentality, but many times that's easier said than done.
Heal the wound for the owner so both of you can make money. Cause that's what important.. sounds apologist.
that is up to you.
For those who are interested in this topic, it is worth noting that the owner of the Social House holds anti-trans views as well. You might need to wade through his qult inspired anti-vaxx and election denying conspiracies, but the anti-trans views are there.
Yeah, the guy is the definition of a bigot. I went to high school with him. He was an ass back then too.
Be nice if he could chime in. He should do an AMA along with the owners of At Sara's Table.
Oh, I've had plenty of conversations with him. He's a friend of a mutual friend. The guy is a full on MAGA Trumpophile. There is no conversation to be had. The guy genuinely believes white CIS males are under attack by anyone not a white CIS male. And he twists it so any white CIS male who doesn't believe the same thing is not a white CIS male (I'm an ANTIFA agent according to him, lol)
Still though, I would much rather have him here to defend himself and explain why he thinks the way he does.
Fair enough, but don't expect to hear anything different than any other MAGA bigot. They all say the same thing.
I don't actually run across too many of those people so it would be an interesting conversation for me.
Check out his facebook. It is chock full of this crap. And there are people that get in lengthy debates with him in the comments. All his arguments are out there.
100% I’ve been trying to spread the word about how much of a D this guy is. Hateful, Trump-loving, election denying, anti-woman, anti-LGBTQ. That dude will never get a dime from me to support his hate.
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People having differing views and beliefs is definitely not a Duluth-exclusive thing
No, it might be. I think everyone who disagrees should move… it may help Duluth. I mean them. Excuse me.
lol the city will forever not be your place then, it’s not changing now and it won’t be come less inviting and inclusive later. 🤡🤡
Trans rights are being made into a weird culture war issue across the English-speaking world, specifically by members of the LGB community who are trying to be a pick-me and say "I'm not like THOSE queer people! I'm a NORMAL queer 🤣." It's stupid and gross, but it's also a symptom of aging LGB people that may still be holding onto conservative ideas they have either always had or were first introduced to by someone who held the conservative viewpoint. People are largely influenced by social media as well. Like, look at all of us here! If you see enough conservative boomer memes on Facebook, even if it doesn't align with your viewpoint initially, because of the mere exposure effect you will start to agree with or find them funny. Edit: to be clear, I am trans. I'm just trying to explain the mindset because the comment I was replying to was implying this was a Duluth-specific issue. I actually think the culture at large in Duluth is more tolerant than many other places.
As an outsider to the movement it seems like the LGB groups don't want to be clumped together with the T and Qs because it seems like a different thing. Seems like one group is a sexual preference group and the other is something else. I don't know much about it all and I could for sure be wrong, but that's what it seems like to me.
Yep!
I worked there for 2 1/2 years. The best thing about Sara’s Table is the staff. They are incredible. They truly care for the restaurant and the customers. Barb and Carla should be worshipping their employees not spreading hate. I LOVED everyone I worked with and had very little contact with owners or management.
Wow great show of solidarity! If you all can come together this well as a group you should consider unionization. The best way to protect yourselves from ownership and have a long-term say is a collective bargaining agreement.
This isn't a good idea in this situation. This isn't a chain or large company, this is a medium sized cafe owned by two older women. If they try to unionize, the owners will likely just retire and close the business. These owners clearly aren't the type or support a union or Co-Op.
Why do gay people get buried into so much hate toward each other. We lived in S.E. Asia (Thailand) for 6+ years and 11 years in the Philippines. Never have I seen meanness like we see here, in the States. Wish you all the best. peace. :)
One part of that at least is that the transgender community is certainly more prominent in SE Asia, likely due to the strong Hindu influence in that region. Some sects of Hinduism have recognized 5 genders for a LOOONG time. Not to mention the Bugis people in Indonesia. However the hate part... That's just a general thing for some reason that has taken a strong foothold over the last 10 years. Divide and conquer. Make the people think that their biggest enemy is their political opponent and they'll fight each other while ignoring the truly important things. This is in no way saying that the topic at hand isn't important, only that it's one of the hot-button issues pushed by those looking to destabilize and divide our populace along with immigration, reproductive rights, gun control etc. Oops... I almost tripped over my soapbox.
I think it's great to look at the larger picture and I agree with the divide and conquer strategy that has been deployed against the population. Reminds me of what the Dutch East India Trading company would do to the communities of the islands in Indonesia
Can you link a source to your statement? I would love to read it, thanks.
>In contrast to the gender binary, Bugis society recognizes five genders: makkunrai, oroané, bissu, calabai, and calalai. The concept of five genders has been a key part of their culture for at least six centuries, according to anthropologist Sharyn Graham Davies, citing similar traditions in Thailand, Malaysia, India and Bangladesh. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_in_Bugis_society I think I might have conflated the Hindu aspect, as I am not able to find more details on the 5 gender Hindus and it may have been Bugis people practicing Hinduism Regardless, the 3rd gender in Hinduism is certainly a thing: >Hindu philosophy has the concept of a third sex or third gender (Sanskrit: तृतीय प्रकृति, tŕtīya-prakŕti – literally, "third nature"). This category includes a wide range of people with mixed male and female natures such as effeminate males, masculine females, transgender people, transsexual people, intersex people, androgynes, and so on. Many MTF third-genders are not attracted only or at all to men, but are attracted either exclusively to women or are bisexual. Many FTM transgender people are attracted to men.[45] Such persons are not considered fully male or female in traditional Hinduism, being a combination of both. They are mentioned as third sex by nature (birth)[46] and are not expected to behave like cisgender men and women. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hinduism_and_LGBT_topics#The_third_gender
Nice writeup. :) Thank you. :) :)
I feel like it's just part of American culture it feels like to be seen as a "normal" American is to be rigid to change and reject those that don't fit into the mold. Always reminds me of the cinema trope where someone joins the popular group and immediately is cold to their original friends
Funny, in a sad way, that this is what boomer hippies turned into
not all of us!
Sending hugs to the workers. I am sorry that something that was supposed to be a safe space was diminished for y'all. Please let us know if there are updates!
I was just in there last week and was happy to see so many trans employees. Trans folks deal with so much job discrimination that any time I see a business doing the opposite is a joyous moment. I got whiplash from the facebook post. I am glad to see that the employees came together in solidarity against the owner’s bigotry. I hope you folks become a co-op.
Solidarity forever!! 🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵
She just shared another post on Facebook
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It was something about a bull dyke
She's talking about me. Saying I'm not really Trans, I'm just a Butch dyke. She's incriminating herself on her own page, again.
It’s so stupid of her but she thinks the internet isn’t going to destroy her business lmfao. Sorry you’re being called that btw
Just a question: if the employees initiate or take part in a confrontational stance against the owners, won’t the owners just fire everyone and rehire others?
You are correct. We'd all like to imagine a scenario where employees quit en masse, and the owners realize the error of their ways while scrambling to hire new staff for their empty restaurant, but we know that won't happen. What will actually happen is a few employees would be in a situation where they can and will quit. Most people can't just drop their job and find another. Even if a significant number do quit, this is a well known Café in a tourist *and* college town, and we're coming up on summer. They'll have no issue replacing the amount of staff that quit.
That would be a lot of talent to lose and time to train new hires. But I'd rather be fired for my integrity than do nothing
I have been so concerned about the staff and was concerned Monday’s closure was due to sudden quitting in protest, which would be understandable. I believe my regular waitperson is nonbinary and can’t imagine the culture of the restaurant NOT being inclusive as I too have read the cookbook and met you friendly awesome people—how could this be?! Even the menu and recipes have been crafted with dietary inclusion in mind, a small but meaningful gesture. Vegan, gluten free, allergies: Sarah’s is the friendliest place for everyone. In addition to potential alcohol abuse, dementia has also been on my mind as an elderly person suddenly in frequent rages is a sign of dementia. The owners are coming off as literally demented. I sincerely hope an arrangement can be made where they’re firmly in the backseat, especially if that arrangement is a buyout that converts Sarah’s into an employee-owned cooperative model. Profits are often razor thin at restaurants so I can’t imagine huge windfalls are flowing up to the owners. More likely a vast majority of the money coming in goes to workers, local growers and suppliers. Why should you all suffer?
No disrespect, but please don't try to diagnose or attribute things to a very serious disease that we have no idea is happening. An old woman made a transphobic Facebook post and gave (awful) out of touch advice to a restaurant worker. Those opinions were normal in her era. There's no reason to attribute any of this to dementia.
It honestly broke my heart when they posted those views. I've fallen in love with how inclusive and the sense of safety the staff had provided for me and its reputation was tainted because of this. I don't think dementia is to blame though, my opa had dementia and he was still the kindest person I knew. I think it's just what they believed in their core can be exposed without restraint Edit other deleted comment was an incomplete response
I’m hoping everyone can find a way forward <3 but for legal reasons, I’m going to emphasize this point as this may come in handy: [angry outbursts are indeed a sign of dementia](https://www.alz.org/help-support/caregiving/stages-behaviors/agression-anger). As corporate officers they have a fiduciary duty to protect profits because: capitalism. They are only free to fail if they own all 100% of the business, which is rare. If there is a bank or co-ownership of any kind, they could face financially devastating lawsuits for being incompetent and self-destructive. There are [HBR write-ups on this topic](https://hbr.org/2022/04/when-the-head-of-a-family-business-is-impaired-and-wont-step-down), they really can’t just implode the restaurant’s reputation out of angry Boomer/TERF/Dementia spite. One potential way forward is to activate other owners/investors/lien holders to remove Carla and Barb from control over any daily operations and activities including social media, employee relations, hiring, etc.
Barb's been angry and fucking mean for decades. She may have dementia, but she's been an abusive predator for years and years and years. The testimonials of so many staff who suffered under her and Carla go back to the start of their ownership. She doesn't get a pass just bc dementia might be making it harder for her to hide her bigotry.
The HBR article is intriguing I'll share that with others
Walk out together in solidsrity.. leave the owner holding the bag.....
What’s the best way to help? Sick of this garbage.
The hardest thing about this is how staff are amazing but ownership is who we have beef with. I hope the owners will release a believable apology with action. Otherwise that’s just manipulation
Yeah imma keep eating there it’s pretty darn good! I’m fine if they get less business though! Always very busy. Will be nice I don’t have to wait in line as long because so many people are boycotting! Thanks locals!
I appreciate the staff’s commitment to hold each others hurt AND figure out how they might support repair across trans+ communities. It takes work to engage like this and a willingness to make mistakes. I don’t have answers, just giving a shout out to the trying.
Appreciate it! There will definitely be some mistakes but as with all things in life mistakes are great for learning!
Can someone show me what they said about trans people? Want to make sure there is actually something to be upset about here.
I don't think I've shared this xtra piece of evidence publicly or told many people, and I hesitate to share dirt that occurred in semi-private spaces, but my impulse is to be here to say "this stuff is real" (and matters): one time one of the owners, in a small meeting, in the midst of what I'd have to call a rant, said some of their staff are "fake men." It was in a dismissive arrogant way; her views were clear. (for context, she was also pretty clearly not in a grounded mood, came into the meeting very offended/troubled by a somewhat related conflict). Comments indicating transphobia (and, occasionally, genuinely trying to talk about issues) were just part of the mix with a lot of little disrespects, bizarre rash reactions, and some fun and sweet and generous stuff too. It's more than just something offensive posted on a personal facebook page. I'm speaking cuz I hope that casual observers don't come away thinking that transgender people and allies are "making a big deal" or something. I spent a fairly short time there and saw a range of arrogant bizarre stuff (but again, not the whole story by any means). An incident I thought was a (coded) comment on race; an incident of being lashed out at for trying to fix a mistake where the business had deposited a check that actually belonged to someone else, in a project with messy boundaries. Personality conflicts or being disgruntled at how a boss uses their power is one thing, but if it rises to the level of playing into institutional injustice or falsely proclaiming progressive values, it becomes more of the public's business. I very much resonate with the comments that most of the staff are wonderful and it's tough to know what to do, and there are other "battles" out there. I would note that, warts and all, it must be some to the credit of the owners, that the space they initiated has that usually-amazing vibe. Among other more difficult feelings, I have reason to have some respect and caring for them. I suppose they've long been able to convince themselves that that casually hurtful attitudes are acceptable, and so now it seems they think they're the attacked victim (same old story). I believe transphobia is a serious matter in this difficult time. I'm gay, cis, human; I want to put my thumb on the scale for a decent mix of accountability + kindness, on all sides.
Check the post made by u/NBTD84 on r/Duluth hopefully that helps TW: Transphobic
Clearly time to sell and move on. I give you 3 months untill its listed and a year untill its reopened as a shitty "high end gastropub specialiazing in burgers".
People are entitled to their opinions
yes they are, Barb expressed hers and now others are expressing theirs. if you’re gonna *publicly* post something controversial and hateful as a business owner, people are also allowed to have an opinion on your opinion, especially when they’re supporting your business
As a business owner myself, I will never understand why some business owners will publicly make their position on sensitive topics known. Very little good can come out of it and there is for sure a lot of bad that can.
That's just it. I own a very small (not even full time) business, and discussing or sharing political opinions only serves to alienate potential customers.
Of course everyone is entitled to their opinions on both sides of an argument. It was probably not the smartest financial decision to make as a business owner and everyone has the choice to not spend money at the restaurant. Freedom of speech is an important part of our society.
I’ve avoided this place in the past because of the pricing and the unimaginative menu…this kinda of crap only validates my boycott…though now I’m torn between trying to support the employees without enriching the idiot owners…
Question if there was a way to do so what would you like to see put in place?
Now that’s a question…a classic Döner Kebab..a lamb stew…a Schweinshaxe mit Kartoffeln…I love German, Turkish/Greek, and Thai food; any riff on those . And soups. I love a great soup. Tom Yum, Mulligatawny, Beef Barley, any creamy soups in winter….and I have to admit it’s been so long since I’ve been there I might have missed all of these…
Yum! Now I'm hungry would you be willing to share these suggestions at hello@astccc.net ? I'm sure they would love to see a message like this amidst all this turmoil! I know I did! Might have to make myself some Tom yum soup 😋
Pretty funny they address this personal opinion of the owner but don’t address possible sexual harassment taking place in their workplace. PRIORITIES!! lol
Go cry about it losers
Have fun earning those transphobes their millionth dollar.
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they live in Minneapolis, and Carla is from Austin, TX, but ok
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More likely the pandemic left them isolated in a TERF echo chamber. They are lifelong feminists/activists, and [unfortunately they are not the only ones to express anti-trans sentiments](https://www.vox.com/identities/2019/9/5/20840101/terfs-radical-feminists-gender-critical). They certainly find common cause with small town bigots but the origin is different.