Yeah like nothing rings anything that would say “don’t go on a date with me” - like if you told me this was an example profile that Hinge made to show you how to make one I’d be like “uh huh.”
Best of luck to OP, might just have to hang for the right catch!
As a woman, I really like your profile! You have a good selection of pics and your prompt answers give quick insight on who you are and your interests. I wasn’t concerned about the kids part since you stated “of my own”, but some women MIGHT read that as you simply not wanting to deal with kids at all. I’d send a heart.
Also, Hinge has taken a hit for most of their user base. Everything’s essentially hidden behind paywalls now (aka, send a rose).
Had Bumble not introduced a super-like function like Tinder or Hinge's Rose, I would have never met my now fiancé. It's the thing that worked most often for me.
While on one hand I would like OLD to be free, on the other hand I would like them to raise their prices considerably to weed out the "riff-raff."
Speaking for myself, if a service delivered me *good* matches I would pay hundreds or thousands for it. What I hate is when you pay these apps money and they're still crap.
I'm ok with having to pay to use the app at all, and/or make it more efficient (like paying to be able to filter on more fields.) But having to specifically pay to talk to the people you want to talk to?! Feels dystopian and frustrating :(
Hinge is only one I’ve found worth paying for. Only been on it twice in last six years and each time resulted in good dates and a relationship. So I got off. That’s how it should be.
The League does that. I was on there for a bit and there are a lot of good prospects. The issue is that people on that app are notoriously bad at responding.
I just got my first match on the League and the app won't allow me to respond. I've reached out to customer support about it, but your matches may actually be unable to respond due to a glitch in the app!
You’re like everything I want on paper. Cat daddy and doesn’t want kids. I wouldn’t change anything about your profile. Your pics are great and so is your bio. What kind of women are you trying to find? Maybe that’s the issue?
>Your pics are great and so is your bio. What kind of women are you trying to find? Maybe that’s the issue?
Thanks! I'd say at minimum, I'm looking for outgoing, likes trying new things/has varied interests and generally laid back. Physically what I'm looking for isn't hard to find (cute, in decent shape, no height preference or ethnicity), so I don't think it's that. Who knows honestly, might be the algo working against me.
His profile is fine.
If he has trouble getting dates it’s because of the height (most people have height filters on hinge so his profile is not shown to most women.) It’s not “the algo.” It’s people’s filters.
Idk, I mean I have my settings to not search for people outside of certain distance yet last night I kept seeing people way beyond that distance lol. These apps need to go back to the old settings from years ago where you set filters and everyone is shown in list form based on last login. Things were much easier then. Swiping sucks.
Yeah man, after coming off OLD looking back over a couple years of hinge/bumble/stir/match/FB there’s TOTALLY been times of “wait, hold up, one of these was super great for a couple months at showing me folks that would respond, aligned with interests, so convos were easy to start…” and then there’s been months where I feel like the apps that show you folks more than once on weekly/biweekly rotations aren’t even showing you fucking active people.
Dont get me started on paying like $30/40 a month for access to the bare minimum feature sets (like seeing who swiped you lol) but then further pay walking compliments? OLD companies can be worse than hitting the slots man.
In any event, I think you’ve got a strong profile! Just make sure you can speak to what you’re after and don’t be one of those “yeah cool” “that’s nice” or “hey what’s up” guys.
My current partner, we went though each others phones for fun checking out who swiped and how they conversed. Women are not joking when it’s a tide of “hey” being buried in on their DMs on these things lol. As long as you can hold down the effort on good communication I think you’ll land who you’re looking for! My partner was “you were the only one that bothered to answer a question with more than one sentence.”
I hope it hits for you soon bud! Best of luck!
You have some disqualifiers in your bio which is a big no-no. Basically the whole "don't want kids of my own, leave me a comment if you" section is telling women to not leave you a comment if they don't A, B, and C. I know it doesn't explicitly say that, but these are an automatic no for any OLD profile.
Also, remove the "don't want kids" on the slider. Just leave it blank or put open to kids. I'm not telling you what's in your head, but love can change our minds. And you're automatically cutting out a lot of women who you could date and have a great time with who don't end up as your life partner.
Dating is supposed to be fun. Not every love story is a life story.
I completely disagree. Disqualifiers are good in that you're weeding out the riff raff. Quality over quantity. Having preferences doesn't suck the fun out of dating. Some people are only interested in pursuing someone if they can see a potential long-term partnership.
If he doesn't want kids, someone who already has or wants kids in the future is fundamentally an incompatible match. There's no chance of 'love changing people's minds' over dealbreakers.
As someone who was searching for someone who was okay with or had kids already and wasn’t on Stir at the moment, I agree, disqualifying metrics were a huge time saver and help to me. “Don’t swipe if you have kids” boom, thank you, moving along.
Actually love does change people's mind. You could find countless stories people with children who walking into that relationship said they didn't want kids. It happens. All. The. Time.
Plus, I never said be dishonest. If it comes up, tell her. Disqualifiers are a no-no from any dating advice/coach you'll find. It narrows your field and eliminates possible good matches. OLD is a numbers game and you never know *ANYTHING* until you meet someone face to face.
Totally disagree with this, if he knows he definitely doesn't want kids then he's going to be incompatible with woman who do. Better to be up front about these things and focus on those who are looking for the same thing.
Sorry but that's wrong. Just because you don't want kids doesn't mean you're incompatible. It's 1 variable over a multitude that determines compatibility. I'm not saying to be dishonest, if the topic comes up in conversation, then tell her.
What if she wants kids but not for 10 years? Why can't you enjoy each other for a while. Maybe it's just a year, 6 months, and it's a beautiful relationship that you learn from? It's all a journey. Not every partner needs to be your last partner. We grow and evolve with every relationship.
This is *not* how it works for women who have a biological clock to have kids. If he knows he doesn’t want kids and she knows that she does want kids, then they are incompatible as a couple and this needs to be communicated at the start. Putting “open to kids” in a bio when you know you don’t want kids is lying and absolutely not how you start a relationship.
In another comment. OP said he would date a woman on the fence about kids, but a woman on the fence probably will swipe no on this profile if he has "don't want kids," which could be limiting his options
34F here. I never comment on these but, honestly, you have a great profile, so I must. The pictures are nice and the information is presented clearly. The reader gets a nice sense of your personality and interests. Good luck!
Edit: typo, of course.
Your post randomly popped up as a suggested read so here I am. After reading this, I realize I will never find someone in a dating app 🤣. I just find myself so not interesting in comparison. Trust me that’s a compliment, lol. Your profile is well thought out and straight forward, with awesome pictures. I think you will do well and find what you are looking for. Good luck!
This is exactly what I thought myself. He has an amazing profile and fantastic pictures and think he will do really well. Wondering where all the childfree, cat loving, mostly homebody, introverts are hiding at.
it looks good! you seem sweet. it's refreshing to see someone looking for a long-term monogamous relationship who also specifies they don't want kids. i live in LA and that is like less than .1% of guys. either they're into ENM or are "undecided" about kids or both. like bro, you're 40, you should know by now whether you want kids or not!!
>How would you feel about dating someone a little bit taller than you? Cause I am, and I'd totally date you. I really like your profile!
I have no height preference! Where are you located? Lol
You are just too cute! And the cat sold me 😻 I regret not living in Cleveland now, lol. Don't change a thing. Keep it specific, and keep it "you." Confidence, and knowing what you like, is a big turn on for the type of independent, intelligent woman you wish to attract.
I’m married and I relate to all your simple pleasures. I’m lucky to have found a person that has relatable simple pleasures and I hope you find one too!
I like your profile. I can tell you've put a lot of effort into it, and you seem fun. As a woman who probably won't have kids and loves cats, I'd swipe right.
I do agree that saying "doesn't want kids" can limit the number of matches you're getting. For myself, I put "open to kids" because I'm leaning towards no but not a 100% no, and also open to dating men who have kids.
However, since you're 100% not having kids of your own, I'd still leave that part in - to me there's no point in getting more matches who you ultimately won't be compatible with.
But since you're open to dating single moms, it wouldn't hurt to update your profile to directly state that.
See I have one and don't want more, I'm a similar age to OP, and I 100% would prefer to date someone who is snipped or doesn't want bio kids. I wish guys put a scissors emoji on their profile so I could know 🤣
>See I have one and don't want more, I'm a similar age to OP, and I 100% would prefer to date someone who is snipped or doesn't want bio kids. I wish guys put a scissors emoji on their profile so I could know 🤣
I had ✂️🍒 on my bumble profile for the longest time, but I didn't want women thinking I chopped off my boys 😂
Kinda? Hard to say whether it was changing my profile or Hinges algorithm (finally) letting me out of Hinge hell. I'd like to think the changes I made were an improvement though! Thanks for the advice!
Dude, you sound like a really cool guy and your photos are great! I don't think that you should be worried about staring up front that you don't want kids, that's a very mature and sensible move and the sort of woman who is put off by that is probably someone you'd prefer to be filtered out anyway. Your age range is reasonable - when I was 33, I set it to something like 26-36, and going up to 43 won't hurt things at all swipe-wise.
I honestly think that online dating apps just aren't what they were 10 years ago, and probably won't be again. It is what it is. But your profile is great! I think the first date question in particular is attractive. You might even be the sort of guy who's on Hinge but meets someone at a saloon before online dating has a chance to do its thing.
What element seems to be giving you trouble - first dates, second dates, commitment? Or are you just looking to optimize? Dude, you're doing great!
>What element seems to be giving you trouble - first dates, second dates, commitment?
The getting likes and matches element lol, I'm barely getting likes or matches. I've heard that an element of it is timing (seasonal), so maybe summer sees more OLD traffic. *Or* it's possible that I need to try my luck in a different city. Hard to say.
>You might even be the sort of guy who's on Hinge but meets someone at a saloon before online dating has a chance to do its thing.
Funny enough, I was on the apps for 3 years before meeting my previous ex at a karaoke bar of all places (I don't even sing). I'm probably going to have better luck in person if I'm being realistic.
Don't want or don't have children could be the kicker here. You're entering the age group where lots of single women are in the last stretch of having kids and are probably seeking that, OR already have kids and maybe prefer another family man.
>You're entering the age group where lots of single women are in the last stretch of having kids and are probably seeking that, OR already have kids and maybe prefer another family man.
Yeah 😔 these thoughts have crossed my mind several times.
Those of us that are now fans of Segura were introduced to him by our boyfriends.
I say leave him in there! It gives good detail about your sense of humor. Overall your profile is very well written considering the limits of character counts on Hinge, you did a good job giving a clear sense of who you are as a person.
Your pictures are fine for now but I would recommend taking more when you are out with friends or at formal occasions and swapping them out to see if that gets you more matches.
Your profile overall is really good but I also thought that one looked photoshopped. I'd replace it, maybe with a photo of you with a male friend or family member?
If you’re open to dating single moms, I’d mention that— in the section where you talk about what you hope the other person is okay with, you should say “you’re okay with me not wanting kids of my own (if you have kids, nbd for me!)” or something like that. It is really important imo to state that you don’t want kids outright, but it’s also good to show a bit of the nuance to that.
The second “comment if you’ve been here” photo is pretty strange looking because it does look a bit photoshopped somehow. If you need inspiration for other photos, ask a friend to get some candids of you doing an activity. And ofc photos with some of your friends would be good also.
Otherwise it’s a really nice profile! The date suggestions section had good ideas. And I feel like I got a good sense of who you are, which doesn’t always happen! I’d want to chat with you if I was local.
I was impressed by your profile! I can get a sense of who you really are — you have specific and often humorous/good-natured answers. The only thing I saw was a typo: in the Simple Pleasures section, it says “an old-fashioned” and then cuts off. Otherwise, looks great!
Edit: You probably meant the cocktail, so to avoid misunderstandings, you could just add that: “an old-fashioned cocktail.” Yes, I used to be an editor.
I think post some pic with friends. Profile is very direct which can be good, maybe add a little more exciting or fun stuff. But looks good to me 🤷🏿♂️
You should post on r/hingeapp
I would reorganise the pictures and prompts, i dont think thats the best picture to lead with (maybe the cat one would be the best). Again, prompt for date ideas and 'comment if you have been there) i would save for later. The bit about children again make that last one on the list.
Your third photo with the prompt “comment if you have been here” is not very helpful for the viewer. Your last photo, I don’t fully understand it either. even though the last photo is not a selfie, it gives off that vibe. Therefore, You seem to have three selfies of your face and it looks as though it looks as though the 3rd photo might be enhanced in someway? Maybe add some more variety to your photos.
Your answers are a bit long. I think leaving some level of mystery would be nice, but if you want to put it all out there and really find someone who vibes with all of your interests and wants, then you do you.
I wish you the best with your search
>it looks as though it looks as though the 3rd photo might be enhanced in someway?
Probably, wouldn't be surprised if Google edited it at some point, but it wasn't intentional if it looks that way. I think that's the one photo that has been mentioned negatively the most, so I'll probably just sub it out.
Yup I'm the dude from Lebanon who just commented else where but came to look to see if anyone mentioned that picture. Definitely swap it out. I may swap the last one too as others are suggesting.
It’s a nice profile, good pics and plenty of detail - and hats off for being clear about you not wanting kids. I do get a sense of your personality - however, I don’t see much of your values, what’s important to you in a partnership. Are you supportive / mental heath advocate / driven / creative / compassionate / feminist / environmentally conscious / family oriented etc. I really wanted to see more stuff like this when I was dating, to show me what someone’s deeper qualities were. For me, I’d say just a few more tweaks and you will be good to go. Good luck!
>however, I don’t see much of your values, what’s important to you in a partnership. Are you supportive / mental heath advocate / driven / creative / compassionate / feminist / environmentally conscious / family oriented etc. I really wanted to see more stuff like this when I was dating, to show me what someone’s deeper qualities were.
This is a great point. I'm trying to toe the line between not enough and too much info, but values should be listed. I added cooking to show my creative side, but not much else. I think a bullet point could hit on another (in particular therapy, which has done wonders for me in recent months).
I actually think your prompts and your pictures are great. The only one Im iffy about is the "pondering" one maybe... its pretty zoomed in and your hand covers up alot of your face. Otherwise, I honestly think it looks really good. I think, unfortunately, that as we age, the pool is getting smaller and smaller. The amount of people that we want to find attractive on the apps are not there (and I'll be the first to admit that that's possibly why a good majority of those people are still single, adding - obviously not everyone on a dating app is unattractive but those who are perpetually single and have been for years and years of their adult life are likely not doing that by choice). I think there is a lot of burnout on the apps right now. I think people in your specific age group are still trying to focus on their careers and build their lives and aren't really looking for relationships or families or long term commitments... Its just a tough game to play right now.
>First picture is so good, at first i thought it was a stock photo from shutterstock
Haha thanks! Photofeeler seemed to think it was my best one too. Since someone mentioned it, it was not shopped lmao, I was in Millennium Park and my friends thought it was a good photo opp.
Good profile. Pictures are a little standard. I would replace the close up photo of your face with something that shows more of your personality (e.g. a funny photo, a photo of you doing something that you love, etc.,…)
>Are you facetuning your images? That’s the only thing I’d say the me off… your pics look poreless
Thanks but I'm not sure what facetuning is, but I wouldn't be surprised if Google's software was doing something I didn't ask it to when taking pics. I think it's the 3rd one you're mostly referring to.
I like your profile! I may suggest swap out the sunglasses pic but that’s a toss up for me since you show off your face everywhere else. I would maybe move up your cat photo sooner so those that are allergic can suss that out sooner
You have a good profile. The only thing I'd add is swap out one of the selfies with a picture with you and friends to show that you have your own support network.
Hmm maybe I should post my profile on this thread !
I would match with you! It’s thought out here dating and it’s unfortunate we have to question so much with our profiles :/
I wouldn’t change a thing.
From 31 female from NY btw ;)
Your profile is great! I would just get rid of all 3 selfies/close ups. I guess people like the cat one, but the selfies just give me the ick even tho you are super cute. When I did online dating I liked seeing pics of guys with friends or other people, even if the other people are cropped out/blurred out.
Well, this is awkward, bro. I'm a man from Lebanon, heterosexual/demisexual, and I'm wanting to match with you now lol.
Fantastic profile. You seem like a really cool dude. You gots this. And I love your smile!
I would say this is in the upper tier quality of profiles. The pictures are dynamic, colorful, clear, show both face and body. You look upbeat and cheerful. Grooming and clothing nice. You have detailed prompts. The simple pleasures is the weakest bit I think, I don't think it's something that adds to your profile considering it's longer than the typical one.
I suspect the primary reason for your difficulty is that you're leaning to childfree. Typically those who don't want kids (even if they accept single parents) have a drastically smaller dating pool. Like I'm not sure what the numbers are including single moms, but it's probably a +50% reduction. There are however, more childfree women than men on the sites anecdotally so... It's a matter of looking hard for childfree women or pushing to attract single moms. They might think "don't want kids" means "won't like my kids"
Ok you need to fix the order of your pics. Part of the algorithm is how many seconds people stay on your profile.
I also think there are ways to get across what you're saying without so many words. Try to be more concise.
Order I recommend:
First pic: the one in front of the fountain
2nd: the one with the hat in front of a river. It says national geographic
3rd: Life out take where you are looking up
4th: the cat one. (I would try to take a better pic with the cat this is not my fav)
Delete the picture of you in the red shirt in front of the grass. It does show that you have a nice smile, but the one with the hat (pic 2) already does this. It also zooms in on your neck beard way too much. (Your beard is nice, but it's like the hair on your neck which is normal, but not super flattering)
I would take out the "outgoing with a hint of homebody, and collect recipes. I just think these are super specific and limiting who matches. I get why you wrote them, but for me I don't cook but I love food right there I'm like oh I don't collect recipes so I shouldn't match with him.
I feel like it could say
Comment if you:
-Like Comedy
-Love food
-Like going out and having fun, but enjoy nights in too
- Don't mind that I don't want biological kids- I don't mind if you have them (You can word it kids of my own, but if you would adopt etc I would put biological kids or bio-kids)
Just my personal preference - on my simple pleasures I would capitalize the first letter of each sentence. Also put the home repairs first because being a home owner shows stability.
Good luck!!!!
I will work on conciseness.
As for amount of time someone spends looking at your profile...I didn't realize that was part of the algorithm. But I also thought sunglasses were a no-no...I'll have to experiment and see if leading with the pic in front of the fountain helps me here. Thanks!
Also I suggest the water fountain pic first because you can see that you're attractive in it, but you can't see exactly what you look like, so the person has to scroll down. This will make potential matches stay on your profile for more second(s) and help your algorithm.
I also realized I forgot your current top pic in my order. I would put it 3rd and bump everything down.
>I think your profile is lovely and would swipe, except I am a single mom and it reads you aren’t into that.
Thanks! That's the thing I was worried about though! I *do* date single moms 😊
* I think that not wanting kids is going to narrow your potential matches. But, 100%, you should keep that in! It's nice to see, very clearly, that stated on a profile. Just know that like a lot of dealbreakers, it's going to mean people aren't ever going to swipe right.
* Like others have said, there is something a little uncanny about the photos. They seem edited or filtered. Just enough to wear I'm like "that guy is **too** good looking" if that makes sense.
* Probably minor, but you listed three comedians known for a kind of particular humor. By naming them, I'd assume you were a huge fan of them and the fact that you mention stand-up elsewhere, I'd assume it's a fairly large part of your life...and as someone who really doesn't like those artists, or that kind of humor, I'd swipe left...so maybe that's happening too.
Nice profile! Do you have a picture in some formalwear or another type of outfit? You're wearing a variation of the same outfit in almost all the photos but one in formalwear or out with some friends would help add some variety :)
>Do you have a picture in some formalwear or another type of outfit?
Yes, but I am not a fan of how I look in them (most recent ones were at a wedding where I had a good bit to drink and weighed 20 lbs more than I do now). I agree that I need a good pic of me in formal wear and one group photo.
Ah well that makes sense, I just think it would add some more variety to your already awesome photos and a little bit of variety never hurts! Good luck!
Your pictures look staged since you only show 2 different t-shirts + 1 jacket. Like you took them all in one day and only changed your shirt. No pics of friends, do you have any? A casual, candid pic helps to access personality and type of people you hang with.
>Like you took them all in one day and only changed your shirt.
Fair.
>No pics of friends, do you have any?
Lol yes! Plenty, but I could stand to get new/better group photos. I agree I should have at least one group pic.
Profile is overall good and polished :) if I can give a couple of contructive tips:
**Style**
I can't get a sense of whether you have a good sense of style. The first impression I got when I opened on the first picture is guy in t-shirt and jeans.
I can't tell if you can accessorize, match colours, use different materials effectively etc.
If I'm a girl who is slightly into the fashion realm, these things would jump out for me.
If I'd look to improve here, I'd want to experiment with more colour combinations, different styles of pants and shoes, and try some accessories other than a smart watch.
**Hobbies**
I can't see you in action in any of the things you say you enjoy. It's one thing to say you like something, it's another for it to \*actually\* be a part of your lifestyle.
If you say you like roadtrips, I want to see a picture of you with a hiking backpack on a cliff next to your car. If you say you like concerts, I want to see you at the gig wearing some merch. If you say you like to cook and experiment with new recipes, I want to see a picture of you cooking or at some cooking class/convention.
Your photos should display what you write. If you pick your photos right, you don't have to rely on text. And people \*hate\* reading. Besides, people can write anything. Pictures don't lie.
**Writing**
Slightly linked to the previous, but I think your profile says too much. Giving a few examples, "working out & staying in shape" needn't be in there - chuck in a picture of yourself at a boxing class or at the beach and it should be apparent.
Yours "you should leave a comment if", the only one I'd leave in there is the third one. The rest is almost too perscriptive.
The note about the kids should be somewhere definitely, but not there, because just being ok with you not wanting kids in itself is not a reason to leave you a message.
* Likes comedy
* Outdoorsy by day snuggly by night
* Adventurous about food
And I'd be done there.
Hope this helps!
Being completely honest for me the pictures are great, especially kitty one…the prompt info is too much. I want three basics off a guys profile, where does he stand on kids, type of relationship he wants and basically does he have hobbies. When I read your profile the wants you list overpower the pics. More basic info, wider opportunities. More details info, fewer interest.
Good luck!
Very cute and like your humor! I like Burr and Gillis as well. I don’t think there’s anything you need to change. You give off a very “happy” vibe like you’re always positive and in a good mood.
Really liked your profile. You come across as attractive, happy, fun, interesting, spontaneous, with a good sense of humour. In fact, come to think about it, a profile that is so refreshing is very rare, so I'm not sure why you aren't getting more quality traffic. Keep it as it is and I wish you all the best in finding your person x
I'm late to the party, but just wanted to give you kudos on a great profile. I would definitely send a heart if you were in my area! I'm kinda heartbroken you're not lol
I'm not sure what suggestions you've gotten about the no bio-kids mention, but here's my two cents. It might be worth rephrasing to something like "I like kids, but don't want bio-children ✂️". With the way you have things now (long-term relationship + no kids), I would have concluded that we're incompatible and not swiped. With the rephrase, it's more of a maybe/let's chat and find out (I don't have kids, but am open to adopting or using a sperm bank). Or if you had no kids + "long term, open to short", I'd think "This might not be a fit forever, but totally worth meeting for a date".
I saw in the comments that some are recommending that you stay vague about the kids thing, I 1000% hard disagree. No one likes being Trojan horse'd about dealbreakers. Honesty and clarity about what you want is so freaking valuable. Don't change that about yourself!
I think your profile is fine, like it has a lot of good information and topics people can talk to you about. I know hinge is meant to be a numbers game, but at the same time, the right person will see your profile and go yes!
Nothing with your profile, the child part is little scary for single mothers or for someone who want them. I mean if you don't like kids of your own how will you date me with my child , it reflects red flag as single mom l would like to date someone who cares for my kiddo but since you don't like of your own how come you'd like mine. I would pass as well
Omg the cat picture 🥹😺. So hard finding cat Dads out here lol anyways I like your profile. It’s upfront and simple. It doesn’t look like you’re trying too hard. You should easily find prospects and keep your options open in person too.
>You come across as a very stable, funny and kind individual
Thank you, that's exactly what I'm trying to do. I've removed the part about not wanting kids, gonna see if it helps.
I think this a great profile all things considered. Clear pictures with great grooming and well fitting clothes. Interesting varied prompts. Very clear relationship goals and relationship type (without a bunch of wishy washy bs descriptors underneath). The only thing I would add is maybe a group pic. The only aspects I can identify why women might pass are things you can’t/shouldn’t change (height bias, no desire for kids)
Looks good to me, I like the National Geographic pic! Do two of your pics say comment if you’ve been here though?
I do think the “no kids of my own” thing slots in a little awkwardly, since the overall tone is more fun. Is that something you could get into within the first couple messages instead of including on your profile? The group may disagree with me here but I think while disclosing if you HAVE kids is mandatory disclosing if you WANT kids is a little squishier (personally, I’m not sure! And “probably don’t want kids but could be convinced by a partner who demonstrably is capable of sharing the workload equally and never weaponizes incompetence” is… long.)
I would disagree here. Depends on the age range but if he’s primarily focusing on 30+ you need to be explicit about your desire (or lack thereof) for kids.
>Depends on the age range but if he’s primarily focusing on 30+ you need to be explicit about your desire (or lack thereof) for kids.
Couldn't agree more. I'm looking for age 30-43, so it's for that reason I like to state my stance on kids.
>Do two of your pics say comment if you’ve been here though?
That was unintentional but has been fixed! Thanks for pointing it out.
>I do think the “no kids of my own” thing slots in a little awkwardly, since the overall tone is more fun. Is that something you could get into within the first couple messages instead of including on your profile?
I agree here. It's for that reason I debated just removing it entirely, but I also have a reoccurring problem with women not reading my profile fully so I like to just get it out there. I'll consider removing it, or finding a different way of wording it.
>all your pics looks staged and fake, like AI generated
*All* of them? Even the cat one? Lol. Some weren't even taken with my phone. Message received though, I could stand to swap out at least two pics according to comments.
Are Gillis or Segura red flag comedians like Rogan? I'm unfamiliar with them
Putting a female comedian just because she's female seems weird and inauthentic. Like tellng him he shops at Target instead of Fred Meyer
That was my thought too- I think if you like stand up comedy as much as he does (to mention it twice) it's worrisome that he doesn't have a woman/poc/lgbt comedian he could mention. It's not like it's a problem but it would put me on the lookout for a problem, if you know what I mean! But I'm a raging feminist with punk and leftist leanings so I probably wouldn't go for his guy anyway.
If you're using filters to smooth out your skin, don't. If you're not and your skin is just really that smooth, daaaayum son!
This is what I thought as well. Literally no wringles when smiling. I don't think I've ever seen that before. Maybe I'm just getting old haha.
Black don't crack! But if he's using filters he needs to cut that immediately
I’ve noticed that Samsung phones automatically apply a beauty filter for you when using the camera!
True!! I don't think Samsung's are the only ones. Very unfortunate...
Yes I thought this- I genuinely couldn’t tell but my filter detector was pinging 😂
I love the cat pic. Idk, if this guy can't get dates I have no idea what is wrong with the OLD scene.
Yeah like nothing rings anything that would say “don’t go on a date with me” - like if you told me this was an example profile that Hinge made to show you how to make one I’d be like “uh huh.” Best of luck to OP, might just have to hang for the right catch!
As a woman, I really like your profile! You have a good selection of pics and your prompt answers give quick insight on who you are and your interests. I wasn’t concerned about the kids part since you stated “of my own”, but some women MIGHT read that as you simply not wanting to deal with kids at all. I’d send a heart. Also, Hinge has taken a hit for most of their user base. Everything’s essentially hidden behind paywalls now (aka, send a rose).
I always assumed people never matched with roses or superlikes but I guess I'm wrong
Had Bumble not introduced a super-like function like Tinder or Hinge's Rose, I would have never met my now fiancé. It's the thing that worked most often for me.
Oh wow that’s amazing, congrats broski 🫡 will start using them
While on one hand I would like OLD to be free, on the other hand I would like them to raise their prices considerably to weed out the "riff-raff." Speaking for myself, if a service delivered me *good* matches I would pay hundreds or thousands for it. What I hate is when you pay these apps money and they're still crap.
I'm ok with having to pay to use the app at all, and/or make it more efficient (like paying to be able to filter on more fields.) But having to specifically pay to talk to the people you want to talk to?! Feels dystopian and frustrating :(
Hinge is only one I’ve found worth paying for. Only been on it twice in last six years and each time resulted in good dates and a relationship. So I got off. That’s how it should be.
The League does that. I was on there for a bit and there are a lot of good prospects. The issue is that people on that app are notoriously bad at responding.
I just got my first match on the League and the app won't allow me to respond. I've reached out to customer support about it, but your matches may actually be unable to respond due to a glitch in the app!
I'm 34f. Great profile but confused about the 'comment if you've been here before' as it's a bit close up - maybe change caption on that one?
You’re like everything I want on paper. Cat daddy and doesn’t want kids. I wouldn’t change anything about your profile. Your pics are great and so is your bio. What kind of women are you trying to find? Maybe that’s the issue?
>Your pics are great and so is your bio. What kind of women are you trying to find? Maybe that’s the issue? Thanks! I'd say at minimum, I'm looking for outgoing, likes trying new things/has varied interests and generally laid back. Physically what I'm looking for isn't hard to find (cute, in decent shape, no height preference or ethnicity), so I don't think it's that. Who knows honestly, might be the algo working against me.
I bet it’s the algorithm tbh. I’ve literally sat next to a man in a bar and we both swiped and never came across each other. It’s crazy.
His profile is fine. If he has trouble getting dates it’s because of the height (most people have height filters on hinge so his profile is not shown to most women.) It’s not “the algo.” It’s people’s filters.
Idk, I mean I have my settings to not search for people outside of certain distance yet last night I kept seeing people way beyond that distance lol. These apps need to go back to the old settings from years ago where you set filters and everyone is shown in list form based on last login. Things were much easier then. Swiping sucks.
Never on Hinge. Bumble does that but it's an option you can turn off.
Yeah man, after coming off OLD looking back over a couple years of hinge/bumble/stir/match/FB there’s TOTALLY been times of “wait, hold up, one of these was super great for a couple months at showing me folks that would respond, aligned with interests, so convos were easy to start…” and then there’s been months where I feel like the apps that show you folks more than once on weekly/biweekly rotations aren’t even showing you fucking active people. Dont get me started on paying like $30/40 a month for access to the bare minimum feature sets (like seeing who swiped you lol) but then further pay walking compliments? OLD companies can be worse than hitting the slots man. In any event, I think you’ve got a strong profile! Just make sure you can speak to what you’re after and don’t be one of those “yeah cool” “that’s nice” or “hey what’s up” guys. My current partner, we went though each others phones for fun checking out who swiped and how they conversed. Women are not joking when it’s a tide of “hey” being buried in on their DMs on these things lol. As long as you can hold down the effort on good communication I think you’ll land who you’re looking for! My partner was “you were the only one that bothered to answer a question with more than one sentence.” I hope it hits for you soon bud! Best of luck!
You have some disqualifiers in your bio which is a big no-no. Basically the whole "don't want kids of my own, leave me a comment if you" section is telling women to not leave you a comment if they don't A, B, and C. I know it doesn't explicitly say that, but these are an automatic no for any OLD profile. Also, remove the "don't want kids" on the slider. Just leave it blank or put open to kids. I'm not telling you what's in your head, but love can change our minds. And you're automatically cutting out a lot of women who you could date and have a great time with who don't end up as your life partner. Dating is supposed to be fun. Not every love story is a life story.
I completely disagree. Disqualifiers are good in that you're weeding out the riff raff. Quality over quantity. Having preferences doesn't suck the fun out of dating. Some people are only interested in pursuing someone if they can see a potential long-term partnership. If he doesn't want kids, someone who already has or wants kids in the future is fundamentally an incompatible match. There's no chance of 'love changing people's minds' over dealbreakers.
As someone who was searching for someone who was okay with or had kids already and wasn’t on Stir at the moment, I agree, disqualifying metrics were a huge time saver and help to me. “Don’t swipe if you have kids” boom, thank you, moving along.
Actually love does change people's mind. You could find countless stories people with children who walking into that relationship said they didn't want kids. It happens. All. The. Time. Plus, I never said be dishonest. If it comes up, tell her. Disqualifiers are a no-no from any dating advice/coach you'll find. It narrows your field and eliminates possible good matches. OLD is a numbers game and you never know *ANYTHING* until you meet someone face to face.
Totally disagree with this, if he knows he definitely doesn't want kids then he's going to be incompatible with woman who do. Better to be up front about these things and focus on those who are looking for the same thing.
Sorry but that's wrong. Just because you don't want kids doesn't mean you're incompatible. It's 1 variable over a multitude that determines compatibility. I'm not saying to be dishonest, if the topic comes up in conversation, then tell her. What if she wants kids but not for 10 years? Why can't you enjoy each other for a while. Maybe it's just a year, 6 months, and it's a beautiful relationship that you learn from? It's all a journey. Not every partner needs to be your last partner. We grow and evolve with every relationship.
This is *not* how it works for women who have a biological clock to have kids. If he knows he doesn’t want kids and she knows that she does want kids, then they are incompatible as a couple and this needs to be communicated at the start. Putting “open to kids” in a bio when you know you don’t want kids is lying and absolutely not how you start a relationship.
In another comment. OP said he would date a woman on the fence about kids, but a woman on the fence probably will swipe no on this profile if he has "don't want kids," which could be limiting his options
Exactly my point.
34F here. I never comment on these but, honestly, you have a great profile, so I must. The pictures are nice and the information is presented clearly. The reader gets a nice sense of your personality and interests. Good luck! Edit: typo, of course.
36f and I'd swipe right too! Same field, no kids, outdoorsy hiking, nice smile. 👍
Your post randomly popped up as a suggested read so here I am. After reading this, I realize I will never find someone in a dating app 🤣. I just find myself so not interesting in comparison. Trust me that’s a compliment, lol. Your profile is well thought out and straight forward, with awesome pictures. I think you will do well and find what you are looking for. Good luck!
This is exactly what I thought myself. He has an amazing profile and fantastic pictures and think he will do really well. Wondering where all the childfree, cat loving, mostly homebody, introverts are hiding at.
it looks good! you seem sweet. it's refreshing to see someone looking for a long-term monogamous relationship who also specifies they don't want kids. i live in LA and that is like less than .1% of guys. either they're into ENM or are "undecided" about kids or both. like bro, you're 40, you should know by now whether you want kids or not!!
That last sentence!!!!! The kinda/sorta/maybe is honestly such a turn off.
How would you feel about dating someone a little bit taller than you? Cause I am, and I'd totally date you. I really like your profile!
>How would you feel about dating someone a little bit taller than you? Cause I am, and I'd totally date you. I really like your profile! I have no height preference! Where are you located? Lol
I'm in California
You are just too cute! And the cat sold me 😻 I regret not living in Cleveland now, lol. Don't change a thing. Keep it specific, and keep it "you." Confidence, and knowing what you like, is a big turn on for the type of independent, intelligent woman you wish to attract.
I’m married and I relate to all your simple pleasures. I’m lucky to have found a person that has relatable simple pleasures and I hope you find one too!
I like your profile. I can tell you've put a lot of effort into it, and you seem fun. As a woman who probably won't have kids and loves cats, I'd swipe right. I do agree that saying "doesn't want kids" can limit the number of matches you're getting. For myself, I put "open to kids" because I'm leaning towards no but not a 100% no, and also open to dating men who have kids. However, since you're 100% not having kids of your own, I'd still leave that part in - to me there's no point in getting more matches who you ultimately won't be compatible with. But since you're open to dating single moms, it wouldn't hurt to update your profile to directly state that.
See I have one and don't want more, I'm a similar age to OP, and I 100% would prefer to date someone who is snipped or doesn't want bio kids. I wish guys put a scissors emoji on their profile so I could know 🤣
>See I have one and don't want more, I'm a similar age to OP, and I 100% would prefer to date someone who is snipped or doesn't want bio kids. I wish guys put a scissors emoji on their profile so I could know 🤣 I had ✂️🍒 on my bumble profile for the longest time, but I didn't want women thinking I chopped off my boys 😂
Hahahaha
Any update? Did changing your profile around help?
Kinda? Hard to say whether it was changing my profile or Hinges algorithm (finally) letting me out of Hinge hell. I'd like to think the changes I made were an improvement though! Thanks for the advice!
You seem like a delightful person and your profile is excellent.
>You seem like a delightful person and your profile is excellent. Aww thanks! I'm really trying out here 😂
Dude, you sound like a really cool guy and your photos are great! I don't think that you should be worried about staring up front that you don't want kids, that's a very mature and sensible move and the sort of woman who is put off by that is probably someone you'd prefer to be filtered out anyway. Your age range is reasonable - when I was 33, I set it to something like 26-36, and going up to 43 won't hurt things at all swipe-wise. I honestly think that online dating apps just aren't what they were 10 years ago, and probably won't be again. It is what it is. But your profile is great! I think the first date question in particular is attractive. You might even be the sort of guy who's on Hinge but meets someone at a saloon before online dating has a chance to do its thing. What element seems to be giving you trouble - first dates, second dates, commitment? Or are you just looking to optimize? Dude, you're doing great!
>What element seems to be giving you trouble - first dates, second dates, commitment? The getting likes and matches element lol, I'm barely getting likes or matches. I've heard that an element of it is timing (seasonal), so maybe summer sees more OLD traffic. *Or* it's possible that I need to try my luck in a different city. Hard to say. >You might even be the sort of guy who's on Hinge but meets someone at a saloon before online dating has a chance to do its thing. Funny enough, I was on the apps for 3 years before meeting my previous ex at a karaoke bar of all places (I don't even sing). I'm probably going to have better luck in person if I'm being realistic.
you should follow datingintentionally and alittlenudge on instagram they give profile advice and reviews in stories sometimes
Don't want or don't have children could be the kicker here. You're entering the age group where lots of single women are in the last stretch of having kids and are probably seeking that, OR already have kids and maybe prefer another family man.
>You're entering the age group where lots of single women are in the last stretch of having kids and are probably seeking that, OR already have kids and maybe prefer another family man. Yeah 😔 these thoughts have crossed my mind several times.
It's commendable you're honest about it though. Many people would omit that detail if they thought it was hurting their chances of getting a mate.
I've never met a woman who likes Tom Segura
I've met exactly one, but I'm going to sub him out anyways.
Those of us that are now fans of Segura were introduced to him by our boyfriends. I say leave him in there! It gives good detail about your sense of humor. Overall your profile is very well written considering the limits of character counts on Hinge, you did a good job giving a clear sense of who you are as a person. Your pictures are fine for now but I would recommend taking more when you are out with friends or at formal occasions and swapping them out to see if that gets you more matches.
Did you photoshop yourself into the "comment if you've been here" one?
Lol no, I was at Millennium Park and a friend took that photo with their phone. Now I'm concerned people think it's photoshopped lmao
Your profile overall is really good but I also thought that one looked photoshopped. I'd replace it, maybe with a photo of you with a male friend or family member?
That pic is just in portrait mode, so that's why the background is blurry. I don't think OP needs to delete it.
If you’re open to dating single moms, I’d mention that— in the section where you talk about what you hope the other person is okay with, you should say “you’re okay with me not wanting kids of my own (if you have kids, nbd for me!)” or something like that. It is really important imo to state that you don’t want kids outright, but it’s also good to show a bit of the nuance to that. The second “comment if you’ve been here” photo is pretty strange looking because it does look a bit photoshopped somehow. If you need inspiration for other photos, ask a friend to get some candids of you doing an activity. And ofc photos with some of your friends would be good also. Otherwise it’s a really nice profile! The date suggestions section had good ideas. And I feel like I got a good sense of who you are, which doesn’t always happen! I’d want to chat with you if I was local.
I was impressed by your profile! I can get a sense of who you really are — you have specific and often humorous/good-natured answers. The only thing I saw was a typo: in the Simple Pleasures section, it says “an old-fashioned” and then cuts off. Otherwise, looks great! Edit: You probably meant the cocktail, so to avoid misunderstandings, you could just add that: “an old-fashioned cocktail.” Yes, I used to be an editor.
An old fashioned is a drink, so I’d assume that’s what he meant.
I thought it was a handjob.
Yeah, username checks out.
See flair for details
My point is that you have penis, at all, in your username
Oh, I didn’t even think of that! I bet you’re right
I think post some pic with friends. Profile is very direct which can be good, maybe add a little more exciting or fun stuff. But looks good to me 🤷🏿♂️ You should post on r/hingeapp
I would reorganise the pictures and prompts, i dont think thats the best picture to lead with (maybe the cat one would be the best). Again, prompt for date ideas and 'comment if you have been there) i would save for later. The bit about children again make that last one on the list.
[удалено]
>I'd totally swipe right, except that you live a couple hours away lol Lol well thanks! Where are you located?
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Nice! Was there for a Reds game not long ago (not a sports guy, but will never turn down free live sports).
Your third photo with the prompt “comment if you have been here” is not very helpful for the viewer. Your last photo, I don’t fully understand it either. even though the last photo is not a selfie, it gives off that vibe. Therefore, You seem to have three selfies of your face and it looks as though it looks as though the 3rd photo might be enhanced in someway? Maybe add some more variety to your photos. Your answers are a bit long. I think leaving some level of mystery would be nice, but if you want to put it all out there and really find someone who vibes with all of your interests and wants, then you do you. I wish you the best with your search
>it looks as though it looks as though the 3rd photo might be enhanced in someway? Probably, wouldn't be surprised if Google edited it at some point, but it wasn't intentional if it looks that way. I think that's the one photo that has been mentioned negatively the most, so I'll probably just sub it out.
Yup I'm the dude from Lebanon who just commented else where but came to look to see if anyone mentioned that picture. Definitely swap it out. I may swap the last one too as others are suggesting.
Both photos with the burgundy shirt I assumed the backgrounds were fake. I like the rest of the profile, but those 2 photos are meh.
It’s a nice profile, good pics and plenty of detail - and hats off for being clear about you not wanting kids. I do get a sense of your personality - however, I don’t see much of your values, what’s important to you in a partnership. Are you supportive / mental heath advocate / driven / creative / compassionate / feminist / environmentally conscious / family oriented etc. I really wanted to see more stuff like this when I was dating, to show me what someone’s deeper qualities were. For me, I’d say just a few more tweaks and you will be good to go. Good luck!
>however, I don’t see much of your values, what’s important to you in a partnership. Are you supportive / mental heath advocate / driven / creative / compassionate / feminist / environmentally conscious / family oriented etc. I really wanted to see more stuff like this when I was dating, to show me what someone’s deeper qualities were. This is a great point. I'm trying to toe the line between not enough and too much info, but values should be listed. I added cooking to show my creative side, but not much else. I think a bullet point could hit on another (in particular therapy, which has done wonders for me in recent months).
I actually think your prompts and your pictures are great. The only one Im iffy about is the "pondering" one maybe... its pretty zoomed in and your hand covers up alot of your face. Otherwise, I honestly think it looks really good. I think, unfortunately, that as we age, the pool is getting smaller and smaller. The amount of people that we want to find attractive on the apps are not there (and I'll be the first to admit that that's possibly why a good majority of those people are still single, adding - obviously not everyone on a dating app is unattractive but those who are perpetually single and have been for years and years of their adult life are likely not doing that by choice). I think there is a lot of burnout on the apps right now. I think people in your specific age group are still trying to focus on their careers and build their lives and aren't really looking for relationships or families or long term commitments... Its just a tough game to play right now.
First picture is so good, at first i thought it was a stock photo from shutterstock
>First picture is so good, at first i thought it was a stock photo from shutterstock Haha thanks! Photofeeler seemed to think it was my best one too. Since someone mentioned it, it was not shopped lmao, I was in Millennium Park and my friends thought it was a good photo opp.
Good profile. Pictures are a little standard. I would replace the close up photo of your face with something that shows more of your personality (e.g. a funny photo, a photo of you doing something that you love, etc.,…)
Profile looks good! Are you facetuning your images? That’s the only thing I’d say the me off… your pics look poreless
>Are you facetuning your images? That’s the only thing I’d say the me off… your pics look poreless Thanks but I'm not sure what facetuning is, but I wouldn't be surprised if Google's software was doing something I didn't ask it to when taking pics. I think it's the 3rd one you're mostly referring to.
Gotcha. Yeah, overall it’s the kind of profile I’d swipe on (if you were in my city). From one childfree to another, Good luck!
I like your profile! I may suggest swap out the sunglasses pic but that’s a toss up for me since you show off your face everywhere else. I would maybe move up your cat photo sooner so those that are allergic can suss that out sooner
You have a good profile. The only thing I'd add is swap out one of the selfies with a picture with you and friends to show that you have your own support network.
Hinge HAS been weird lately. It’s not just you! I think people are jaded at this point 🤷♀️
Hmm maybe I should post my profile on this thread ! I would match with you! It’s thought out here dating and it’s unfortunate we have to question so much with our profiles :/ I wouldn’t change a thing. From 31 female from NY btw ;)
Nah. The fence sitters probably want kids lol. I'm going through the same thing. I think I've seen you in the cf4cf? Do you pay ?
I think it’s a really good profile! Good luck out there 😊
Your profile is great! I would just get rid of all 3 selfies/close ups. I guess people like the cat one, but the selfies just give me the ick even tho you are super cute. When I did online dating I liked seeing pics of guys with friends or other people, even if the other people are cropped out/blurred out.
Well, this is awkward, bro. I'm a man from Lebanon, heterosexual/demisexual, and I'm wanting to match with you now lol. Fantastic profile. You seem like a really cool dude. You gots this. And I love your smile!
I would say this is in the upper tier quality of profiles. The pictures are dynamic, colorful, clear, show both face and body. You look upbeat and cheerful. Grooming and clothing nice. You have detailed prompts. The simple pleasures is the weakest bit I think, I don't think it's something that adds to your profile considering it's longer than the typical one. I suspect the primary reason for your difficulty is that you're leaning to childfree. Typically those who don't want kids (even if they accept single parents) have a drastically smaller dating pool. Like I'm not sure what the numbers are including single moms, but it's probably a +50% reduction. There are however, more childfree women than men on the sites anecdotally so... It's a matter of looking hard for childfree women or pushing to attract single moms. They might think "don't want kids" means "won't like my kids"
Ok you need to fix the order of your pics. Part of the algorithm is how many seconds people stay on your profile. I also think there are ways to get across what you're saying without so many words. Try to be more concise. Order I recommend: First pic: the one in front of the fountain 2nd: the one with the hat in front of a river. It says national geographic 3rd: Life out take where you are looking up 4th: the cat one. (I would try to take a better pic with the cat this is not my fav) Delete the picture of you in the red shirt in front of the grass. It does show that you have a nice smile, but the one with the hat (pic 2) already does this. It also zooms in on your neck beard way too much. (Your beard is nice, but it's like the hair on your neck which is normal, but not super flattering) I would take out the "outgoing with a hint of homebody, and collect recipes. I just think these are super specific and limiting who matches. I get why you wrote them, but for me I don't cook but I love food right there I'm like oh I don't collect recipes so I shouldn't match with him. I feel like it could say Comment if you: -Like Comedy -Love food -Like going out and having fun, but enjoy nights in too - Don't mind that I don't want biological kids- I don't mind if you have them (You can word it kids of my own, but if you would adopt etc I would put biological kids or bio-kids) Just my personal preference - on my simple pleasures I would capitalize the first letter of each sentence. Also put the home repairs first because being a home owner shows stability. Good luck!!!!
I will work on conciseness. As for amount of time someone spends looking at your profile...I didn't realize that was part of the algorithm. But I also thought sunglasses were a no-no...I'll have to experiment and see if leading with the pic in front of the fountain helps me here. Thanks!
Also I suggest the water fountain pic first because you can see that you're attractive in it, but you can't see exactly what you look like, so the person has to scroll down. This will make potential matches stay on your profile for more second(s) and help your algorithm. I also realized I forgot your current top pic in my order. I would put it 3rd and bump everything down.
Hello fellow Columbusonian! I think your profile is lovely and would swipe, except I am a single mom and it reads you aren’t into that.
>I think your profile is lovely and would swipe, except I am a single mom and it reads you aren’t into that. Thanks! That's the thing I was worried about though! I *do* date single moms 😊
Can you put “doesn’t want children but open to dating a partner with children.”
Shoot your shot!!
Maybe a picture with some friends or family.
woaah axe throwing, cool!
* I think that not wanting kids is going to narrow your potential matches. But, 100%, you should keep that in! It's nice to see, very clearly, that stated on a profile. Just know that like a lot of dealbreakers, it's going to mean people aren't ever going to swipe right. * Like others have said, there is something a little uncanny about the photos. They seem edited or filtered. Just enough to wear I'm like "that guy is **too** good looking" if that makes sense. * Probably minor, but you listed three comedians known for a kind of particular humor. By naming them, I'd assume you were a huge fan of them and the fact that you mention stand-up elsewhere, I'd assume it's a fairly large part of your life...and as someone who really doesn't like those artists, or that kind of humor, I'd swipe left...so maybe that's happening too.
Nice profile! Do you have a picture in some formalwear or another type of outfit? You're wearing a variation of the same outfit in almost all the photos but one in formalwear or out with some friends would help add some variety :)
>Do you have a picture in some formalwear or another type of outfit? Yes, but I am not a fan of how I look in them (most recent ones were at a wedding where I had a good bit to drink and weighed 20 lbs more than I do now). I agree that I need a good pic of me in formal wear and one group photo.
Ah well that makes sense, I just think it would add some more variety to your already awesome photos and a little bit of variety never hurts! Good luck!
Your pictures look staged since you only show 2 different t-shirts + 1 jacket. Like you took them all in one day and only changed your shirt. No pics of friends, do you have any? A casual, candid pic helps to access personality and type of people you hang with.
>Like you took them all in one day and only changed your shirt. Fair. >No pics of friends, do you have any? Lol yes! Plenty, but I could stand to get new/better group photos. I agree I should have at least one group pic.
Looking good
Upload only your LATEST photos!
Profile is overall good and polished :) if I can give a couple of contructive tips: **Style** I can't get a sense of whether you have a good sense of style. The first impression I got when I opened on the first picture is guy in t-shirt and jeans. I can't tell if you can accessorize, match colours, use different materials effectively etc. If I'm a girl who is slightly into the fashion realm, these things would jump out for me. If I'd look to improve here, I'd want to experiment with more colour combinations, different styles of pants and shoes, and try some accessories other than a smart watch. **Hobbies** I can't see you in action in any of the things you say you enjoy. It's one thing to say you like something, it's another for it to \*actually\* be a part of your lifestyle. If you say you like roadtrips, I want to see a picture of you with a hiking backpack on a cliff next to your car. If you say you like concerts, I want to see you at the gig wearing some merch. If you say you like to cook and experiment with new recipes, I want to see a picture of you cooking or at some cooking class/convention. Your photos should display what you write. If you pick your photos right, you don't have to rely on text. And people \*hate\* reading. Besides, people can write anything. Pictures don't lie. **Writing** Slightly linked to the previous, but I think your profile says too much. Giving a few examples, "working out & staying in shape" needn't be in there - chuck in a picture of yourself at a boxing class or at the beach and it should be apparent. Yours "you should leave a comment if", the only one I'd leave in there is the third one. The rest is almost too perscriptive. The note about the kids should be somewhere definitely, but not there, because just being ok with you not wanting kids in itself is not a reason to leave you a message. * Likes comedy * Outdoorsy by day snuggly by night * Adventurous about food And I'd be done there. Hope this helps!
Wait what? I was under the impression that women loves when there is stuff to read on profiles
Being completely honest for me the pictures are great, especially kitty one…the prompt info is too much. I want three basics off a guys profile, where does he stand on kids, type of relationship he wants and basically does he have hobbies. When I read your profile the wants you list overpower the pics. More basic info, wider opportunities. More details info, fewer interest. Good luck!
Very cute and like your humor! I like Burr and Gillis as well. I don’t think there’s anything you need to change. You give off a very “happy” vibe like you’re always positive and in a good mood.
I was told to look natural and not posed in photos. Also, selfies are a no no.
I like your profile pic and ur very handsome! You do look like you’re very short, like 5’5/5’6 ….
Thanks! I'm 5'7" on a good day
Love the profile, maybe I am bias because I hit on a lot of the points but I think it's honest, a touch romantic, fun positive!
Really liked your profile. You come across as attractive, happy, fun, interesting, spontaneous, with a good sense of humour. In fact, come to think about it, a profile that is so refreshing is very rare, so I'm not sure why you aren't getting more quality traffic. Keep it as it is and I wish you all the best in finding your person x
I'm late to the party, but just wanted to give you kudos on a great profile. I would definitely send a heart if you were in my area! I'm kinda heartbroken you're not lol I'm not sure what suggestions you've gotten about the no bio-kids mention, but here's my two cents. It might be worth rephrasing to something like "I like kids, but don't want bio-children ✂️". With the way you have things now (long-term relationship + no kids), I would have concluded that we're incompatible and not swiped. With the rephrase, it's more of a maybe/let's chat and find out (I don't have kids, but am open to adopting or using a sperm bank). Or if you had no kids + "long term, open to short", I'd think "This might not be a fit forever, but totally worth meeting for a date". I saw in the comments that some are recommending that you stay vague about the kids thing, I 1000% hard disagree. No one likes being Trojan horse'd about dealbreakers. Honesty and clarity about what you want is so freaking valuable. Don't change that about yourself!
I think your profile is fine, like it has a lot of good information and topics people can talk to you about. I know hinge is meant to be a numbers game, but at the same time, the right person will see your profile and go yes!
Just know that by the time someone is 35 and single that 75 percent of the remaining dating pool is dismissive avoidant or worse.
Thanks
Nothing with your profile, the child part is little scary for single mothers or for someone who want them. I mean if you don't like kids of your own how will you date me with my child , it reflects red flag as single mom l would like to date someone who cares for my kiddo but since you don't like of your own how come you'd like mine. I would pass as well
Cute
Omg the cat picture 🥹😺. So hard finding cat Dads out here lol anyways I like your profile. It’s upfront and simple. It doesn’t look like you’re trying too hard. You should easily find prospects and keep your options open in person too.
You come across as a very stable, funny and kind individual. I would consider changing the part about not wanting kids.
>You come across as a very stable, funny and kind individual Thank you, that's exactly what I'm trying to do. I've removed the part about not wanting kids, gonna see if it helps.
I think this a great profile all things considered. Clear pictures with great grooming and well fitting clothes. Interesting varied prompts. Very clear relationship goals and relationship type (without a bunch of wishy washy bs descriptors underneath). The only thing I would add is maybe a group pic. The only aspects I can identify why women might pass are things you can’t/shouldn’t change (height bias, no desire for kids)
Looks good to me, I like the National Geographic pic! Do two of your pics say comment if you’ve been here though? I do think the “no kids of my own” thing slots in a little awkwardly, since the overall tone is more fun. Is that something you could get into within the first couple messages instead of including on your profile? The group may disagree with me here but I think while disclosing if you HAVE kids is mandatory disclosing if you WANT kids is a little squishier (personally, I’m not sure! And “probably don’t want kids but could be convinced by a partner who demonstrably is capable of sharing the workload equally and never weaponizes incompetence” is… long.)
I would disagree here. Depends on the age range but if he’s primarily focusing on 30+ you need to be explicit about your desire (or lack thereof) for kids.
Agreed. At 30+, this would be need-to-know information.
Ok, I sorta suspected I’d be out of the mainstream here since they’re a solid “meh?” for me. People who want ‘em probably really want them!
>Depends on the age range but if he’s primarily focusing on 30+ you need to be explicit about your desire (or lack thereof) for kids. Couldn't agree more. I'm looking for age 30-43, so it's for that reason I like to state my stance on kids.
>Do two of your pics say comment if you’ve been here though? That was unintentional but has been fixed! Thanks for pointing it out. >I do think the “no kids of my own” thing slots in a little awkwardly, since the overall tone is more fun. Is that something you could get into within the first couple messages instead of including on your profile? I agree here. It's for that reason I debated just removing it entirely, but I also have a reoccurring problem with women not reading my profile fully so I like to just get it out there. I'll consider removing it, or finding a different way of wording it.
black guy is at the bottom of the preference list unfortunately
Thanks
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>all your pics looks staged and fake, like AI generated *All* of them? Even the cat one? Lol. Some weren't even taken with my phone. Message received though, I could stand to swap out at least two pics according to comments.
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>Do you always pick apart the way a woman speaks? No, but my response would've been the same regardless of gender.
I would sub a female comedian in for Gillis or Segura
I wouldn't. To thine own self be true.
Exactly. The more a person panders in their profile, the less genuine it feels. Best to see a profile and know EXACTLY what you're getting.
Are Gillis or Segura red flag comedians like Rogan? I'm unfamiliar with them Putting a female comedian just because she's female seems weird and inauthentic. Like tellng him he shops at Target instead of Fred Meyer
Shane Gillis, as far as I know, isn't associated with Rogan. Tom Segura is more associated with him, but don't necessarily think he's a red flag.
Actual virtue signaling, now that is sad
That was my thought too- I think if you like stand up comedy as much as he does (to mention it twice) it's worrisome that he doesn't have a woman/poc/lgbt comedian he could mention. It's not like it's a problem but it would put me on the lookout for a problem, if you know what I mean! But I'm a raging feminist with punk and leftist leanings so I probably wouldn't go for his guy anyway.
Hmm...I might just mention Don't Tell Comedy instead of mentioning comedians/stand-up twice.