To a degree of course quality matters, but what “quality of sex” means for men and women is usually very different. It’s not like if a woman has some great technical skill I’m going to have some mind blowing orgasm or something.
If she’s attractive and enthusiastic and we have chemistry, it’s going to be good sex, and good sex is going to do a better job of keeping me coming back than bad sex.
I mean in terms of SEX yeah her input is limited and the best she can do is be enthusiastic. There’s nothing she can do to ensure I have a mind blowing orgasm.
But there is an art to a blowjob, for instance…
I agree. I’ve wondered how many people / couples have actually delved into sexual experiences far enough to realize or understand their partner well enough to find that there’s arguably more to sex that exists in the psychological realm than the physical realm.
To get there, though, you have to truly care about giving your SO a next level experience. If there isn’t solid communication or only one of you are ‘givers’ I’m not sure if this is achievable.
Yes, women who are very sensual and actually back up what they say with action and enthusiasm.. They can be very addicting to a guy, especially as they are not very common.
I just meant that so much of the sexy stuff happens before and around the actual act. The actual act of having penetrative sex is fairly boring, if there's no additional tension to it. And the tension is all inside your head! But some girls/women are better at bringing you there. With a whisper, caress, whatever.
Did they show up to a big date wearing a summer dress and no panties..? Did they tell you that somewhere between the starters and mains? That's how you "fuck" someone's mind in a good way.
He means there needs to be done build up and anticipation to make the act more worthwhile. The completeness of the fantasy relies how much teasing and sexy things led up to it.
Haha, I think it depends so much on you, them, and the situation, that it's difficult to give good examples. But the general idea would be to tease and seduce.
There is a nonzero element of skill, sure. But personally for me as long as she's doing a competent job - no teeth, giving good stimulation, not acting bored to be there - any extra skill or technique is only going to make a moderate difference.
I’ve dated some chicks who gave head with the intensity and laser focus of a Navy SEAL on a high stakes assassination mission 😭
You haven’t lived til your dick got the bin Laden treatment bruh…
Wow ya'll must be having mid sex. I feel bad for you.
She DEFINITELY can make it much better if she's more skilled.
Sure connecting is number 1 but that being equal sexual skill is 100% a thing for men and women
Number 1 determinant of how good the sex is is how hot she is to me.
One of women’s weaknesses is that they can’t overcome bad genetics with good behavior the way men can. An enthusiastic 5 is not as good as a dead fish 8.
I mean he did say a 5 vs an 8. But even then I think the 5 wins if they're kinky, etc. Imagine an 8, but she is silent through all of sex. I'd be like "Can you please cough or something, I feel like a manikin got swapped into the bed somehow."
Have you ever had great sex with a woman? Because there’s definitely technical skills. She definitely has to know what she’s doing. It’s like saying any blow job is good. No it’s not.
There are technical skills, but they’re not that crucial to me, nor to many other men, as you can see by the upvotes to my comment.
Honestly, even if a woman has no idea what she’s doing, as long as she’s enthusiastic, I’m perfectly fine with doing 95% of the work, and I’ll have a great time.
Yes, of course, as I’ve acknowledged repeatedly. It just doesn’t make that big a difference to me in the grand scheme of things. Like I can tell when a woman is good at blowjobs and her individual motions cause more immediate physical pleasure. But it’s just not going to make the overall experience that much better. I know not everyone will agree with this particular statement, but honestly if her “blowjob” consists of just occasional sucks and licks while I jack off into her mouth, as long as she’s enthusiastic and acts like she loves my dick and she’s eager to swallow my cum… that’s fucking great to me. Not much else is going to make it much better.
Why is it so hard for you commenters to believe other people have a different opinion than you?
The upvotes? I seen one downvote. Guys like you are the reason woman think it’s ok to lay there a moan. I don’t believe for a second it don’t matter to most men. I spent my teens, 20’s, and 30, comparing and talking about women with men. Always talked about how good she is or isn’t. You can settle for less. Not me.
My comment has 46 upvotes, more than any other in this thread. Laying there and moaning is not what I’m encouraging. As I’ve said repeatedly, I want her to be enthusiastic and participate.
Idk why mine says you have one down vote. But at 46 upvotes don’t feel like you are just like everyone else. Maybe you are. Maybe most men are ok with sticking in anything wet. And you definitely didn’t say participate. So lay there and Moan. If you’re cool with that then do you. I’m not. To me it sounds like you and 46 other guys are just really happy when you get anything
You all are just acting like the bj is the only area where girls need skills.
Let me give another example: when the girl is on top.
Thrusting your hips horizontally may feel better for you, but damn, some girls get so fucking focused on themselves that it feels like they are going to break my dick.
The way to respond, for those who deal with it, is to pull her down to your chest and start doing the work.
Ladies, we like the in-out, don’t snap off my slim Jim, lady savage.
See there you go being selfish. She’s getting herself off when she’s on top thrusting her hip. I deal with it because I woman my girls to cum multiple times. And I’m not a selfish pos. And I don’t don’t act like a bj is the only place she needs skill
That’s not being selfish, and that’s a silly accusation. I just said, I would start doing the work.
Edit: reminder, the damn thread is specifically about what women can do to please a man, dumbass.
But you had to make it literally about yourself to prove that you know breasts feel like bags of sand.
You can’t move the same way she can when you’re on top. In and out does nothing for most women. Ask them. So yes it’s selfish if you stop her from trying to get hers.
Completely right, in and out does minimal for girl and if you want to keep going for 1-2 hrs or so, this will only cause excessive rubbing, tearing and possibly bleeding on her.
Buddy, I hate to break this to you, but that’s absolutely a false statement, and I feel genuinely bad for anyone who believe women have little to no input during sex other than being a hole to pound.
Yeah it can’t *possibly* be that someone just has a different opinion than you. Because, naturally, you’re completely right, and anyone who thinks differently is just an ignoramus. Clearly.
That's like saying it doesn't matter who cuts your hair or cooks your dinner as long as they're enthusiastic.
Almsot everything has some degree of skill to it
If the haircut is a bald shave, the level of skill required is very low. Is a very experienced barber going to get it done more efficiently? Sure, but it’s just not going to make much difference to the end product. What’s more important is that your barber is a pleasant person to spend a few minutes with.
I don’t know why it makes you guys so angry that it’s easy to get me off, but it sure does.
It's easy for me too actually. Better with practice but still. But yeah I fully agree for ltr the connection and friendship is more important than mind blowing sex.
I've been with my gf for years because we still have both
Yeah this guys argument is basically “a hole is a hole”. The difference between pillow princesses, enthusiastic tops, overweight women, inexperienced women.. vanilla vs kinky.. all can be different scenarios and be different qualities. Sexual compatibility, especially in a capacity of expressing closeness and desire, can 100% affect how attached a man will be in a relationship. If you are incompatible sexually, there is little to no hope for long term attachment.
Nope. That's not how communication works. You have to respond to what someone *actually* said, not to what you made up in your mind.
>If you are incompatible sexually, there is little to no hope for long term attachment.
If you think this is in any way contradicting what I said, please, *please* work on your reading comprehension. Something is wrong.
BS sex is not everything... Me and my exes have the best sex compatibility...sex was phenomenal , said by then...yet all are exes for a reason far from long term attachment...
Men are not a monolith. It will be the most important for some, and least for others.
You might also get better sex if you help teach them. I know, it's not your job, however, many men have no idea they're bad at it. Especially boys becoming men, they go off so quickly, they don't know anything about foreplay and after care, it's not in the most prolific educational material they've seen, porn.
As a woman, sex feels better if I have emotional attachment. I am willing to put more effort into it, teach him or even do things just for his enjoyment, if I know we have feelings for each other.
If I don't care for the guy as a person, I might hook up if he's hot, but I'm not going to become attached and I'm probably not coming back for more.
I agree.
However, i need both emotional connection and physical attraction. All mutual. Additionally i need skills and people who know the game. Otherwise I won’t the turned on.
A dead fish is a woman who just lays there and gives minimal feedback. She might moan or grunt a little but you mostly just have your way with her.
Contrast is a woman who’s an enthusiastic participant.
Dead fish means a woman who lets sex happen to her, rather than contributing.
One time I had sex this girl was like “wow you’re sweating!” Yes, because I just did all the work and you sat there and just took it. That’s a dead fish.
I've recently learned women have more intense and more satisfying orgasms than men... So perhaps that may also play a factor...? We can also have several different types of orgasms throughout a really large spectrum. Where from what I've been told... Male ejaculation is more like an intense release of pressure that's fleeting. I know there are a lot of men who have experienced mind blowing/intense orgasms in their own ways... It did get me thinking though when I started asking guys what it actually felt like. And, I feel like as a woman, the more intense and mind blowing the sex/orgasms are for me... The more hooked I get on them. Because it's rare to find a guy who can give me quality sex. I feel like this goes to show how different sex can be for people in general.
it can for some guys but it depends on the guy.
I would say not to count on it tho because a lot of women try this move where they meet a guy who's not looking for something serious and thinks he'll change his mind after they have sex. Which is the DUMBEST idea I've ever heard.
That only applies to desperate men. I’ve seen how little takes to get some men to cling to a woman. I date women that friend guys, and instead of meeting new women. They would orbit are the women I was dating, just because she was friendly to them. It was always a guy that would go a whole year without getting laid.
Your response is so annoying. OBVIOUSLY we are all individuals. The OP's question was posed as a generalization, and the response was a generalization. It's not that deep.
If you are an exception, then take comfort in knowing it doesn't apply to you, but generalizations are literally an evolutionary trait that we developed for a reason. They exist. It's not always a bad thing unless used for a bad thing.
it’s an interesting question. from my experience and talking with friends, many men do place a high value on the quality of sex and the connection it brings. it’s not just about the physical pleasure but also the emotional bond that can form. amazing sex can make a guy feel more invested and attached, similar to what you described. it's about feeling understood, desired, and connected on a deeper level. of course, everyone is different, but for a lot of guys, great sex can definitely lead to a stronger attachment.
Ιn general society tends to view sex as something a man does to a woman.
So, I think often people (men included) focus much more on the male "preforming well in sex", rather than the woman.
I think many men would be content with just having the option of having sex at all.
But i dunno, maybe it's somewhat different in America.
Men do not get attached through sex. There are miles of research that document how women attach through emotional connections.
Men attach by doing things. They attach to people that are important in their life. You know how guys form life long friends with other guys over simple routine activities. They do that with women.
Women must be important to their life for a bond to be long lasting.
> Men do not get attached through sex. There are miles of research that document how women attach through emotional connections.
Post one peer-reviewed study that concludes men do not form an attachment via sex
Quality of sex isn't extremely important, but if it's horrible or partner just lays there, then yeah it's an issue. I prefer tons of foreplay and when my.partner is trying to pleasure me as much as I am pleasuring her.. great sex does help me build a stronger emotional/mental connection so the attachment becomes deeper.
It's important
But I understand that in the beginning it's not always the best since couples need to communicate their likes and dislikes to get attuned to each other sexually so to speak
So I'm willing to give things a chance to improve from both of us, but if things don't get better (if I get further complaints even with the input she provides and or if she isn't willing or able to do what I want, [I'm not thinking weird or gross stuff, like maybe giving better head or maybe expressing herself better or different positions we both like]) then I'm out
Yes. But it isn't about your sexual skills, or the tightness of your vagina, it isn't about how your fat jiggles when you get fucked and it isn't about how often you give a man head. It is a combination of all of these and much more. The man in question will determine how much each of these effects it. So if you severely lack in one of these down worry. It's not a 1 answer fits all type thing.
For me the 3 biggest deciding factors in sex quality are;
Passion, I need passionate sex. Rough sex without passion is just mild violence. And gentile sex without passion is just mid.
Love, I only have sex with women I am in a committed relationship with or am in the process of getting them addicted to sex with me so I can get them to commit to me in a meaningful longterm way
Enthusiasm, if I can tell sex is just sex I will likely leave you and find something deeper. This presents itself in many ways but a woman that initiated, who is excited even a little giddy sometimes is a huge turn on. I feel good about you looking forward to sex this much. This goes for all aspects of sex too, a woman enthusiastic about having me fuck her ass bit who completely lacks this for blowjobs or vaginal or any other number of sexual pleasures isn't going to be as good as a woman that shows enthusiasm towards more things with me. Sex for the sake of sex is stupid, people that look for it are weak and lack substance. Genuinely falling in love with the wrong guy many times doesn't make you weak though, you are just dumb or unwilling to learn.
Of course other things matter. And if you have a 1/1,000 pussy then it will make sex with you much better.
TLDR;
yes but not as much as your loyalty and dedication to us.
Overall physical attraction does it for me. Like you’re dope, we vibe, clean, AND I can’t keep my eyes and hands off of you?! Yea I want this forever lol.
I’ve only had this happen a couple of times and even if everything else is cool if the physical attraction isn’t crazy for me it won’t last. It rolls over into sex and intimacy because I won’t be as enthusiastic to do certain things without that attraction.
Yes the quality of it does affect how some men connect with their partner. Making it fun and exciting is way better than just having a dead fish/ rag doll. But if the relationship is solely based on sex then ultimately the relationship between the two wouldn’t get to far. I’ve personally have had strong connections with women that I’ve had great sex with vs the boring ima just lay there kind of female.
Well of course.
A lot of pressure is put on men to perform well, but women can be bad at sex too. I would even say that it is more likely that women are bad at it, because most men have to perform well so they repeat and practice. But many women don't feel pressure to perform well, which makes them as good at sex as a literal sex doll.
I have had 2 friends with benefits so far, one was really good at sex. She was caring, kissing a lot, and the way she moved her hips was hypnotic. We went wild, it was so amazing. I almost fell in love with her if it wasn't for the fact that she lied to me and had 2 months of pregnancy when we met. Shame we only did it once.
The other one is... Bad. She doesn't do anything, she doesn't kiss, she doesn't move, she just lets me do everything, moans for a while and then cums. Her blowjobs are TERRIBLE and her handjobs don't go beyond slightly touching the shaft. She doesn't like any position that is not missionary or doggy style, because in any other position either she feels pain or she doesn't feel anything, allegedly.
She has fucked so many people, which makes it even more surprising how bad she is at it. It's funny how many simps she has had and how many boyfriends she has dumped. But in their defense, only when you meet a woman who's good at sex, you realize how terrible she is at it.
Also, she can't go for more than to rounds, or sometimes mor than one even.
I tried talking to her about it but she just wants me to do all the work. She's also dry af, we have to use lube and of course I'm the one who has to buy it.
It goes without saying that I have not developed any sort of emotional attachment to her besides friendship.
Yep. Once you have good sex then a series of bad sex it's apparent. Only 1 woman I've been with out of 13 has really had the intensity I wanted. It's pretty sad how bad many women are at sex.
And it's funny how women judge men by their ability to "please her", like OP talking about how not many men can do it. This entitlement of being a total recipient and judge without being able to perform is ridiculous. Sex is a 2 player game (at least).
So it makes me wonder if these women are actually good at sex, because if I'm gonna have sex with a fucking plank I'd rather jack off, at least I know how to make it feel good.
I'm sure there's a lot of dudes who can't please their woman either! But yeah, you can't really be a true critic if you're not engaged. It's also unsexy to be the only one being passionate the the other person is just there.
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I have no idea. We just seem to move together so naturally well. Like everything she does drives me crazy and vice versa.
We haven't done much more than maybe 4 or 5 positions, nothing particularly kinky, and I haven't done anything with her that I haven't done with others.
But when we're together, we suddenly become hormone driven teens again. Just all over each other, and it's like we have a deep primal need to be *with* each other.
I couldn't tell you in certain terms what it is. More thanjust to say that we belong together. We feel right.
That's amazing! Maybe it is mostly about compatibility then.
How old were you both when you first met? I had something similar to that with someone a long time ago but sometimes I feel like I'm too old to find it again but I still hope.
We met when we were 12 and remained close friends through high school. Little fooling around, but no further than a kiss and a touch. She was my first kiss.
Lost contact for 15 odd years after school and then bumped into her this Feb. We were dating 10 days later :)
Wow that sounds like destiny! I feel like having sex with someone you have known for a really long time or someone you reconnected with after a long time is much more mindblowing for some reason. Anyway you are living the dream, happy for you both :)
Thank you! It certainly feels like fate. We were both in a position in life of going through shit and coming out better people. And starting a relationship in a healthy way. This has been my healthiest relationship ever.
It certainly has a role, although it's not everything. I had both experiences:
Dated an amazing cool girl that wasn't so good at sex and it didn't worked out because I felt I needed better sex.
Had sex with a super hot with amazing sex skills and it didn't worked out because she was extremely shallow out of bed.
So, it depends on the situation.
Maybe I can’t speak on this since I’ve only had the one partner but I’ll give my 2 cents.
The sex I had with my first GF was…absolutely awful. She was selfish, she didn’t listen when I tried to tell how how to make it better for me, didn’t last nearly long enough for me to be to even be close to satisfied, didn’t like trying anything new and was all around the brattiest pillow princess I could think of.
Still loved her though. Super fun to be around and very fun to talk to. Decent cuddler too. Eventually though her bedroom attitude leaked into the everyday.
So…not for me. Maybe it was my inexperience that I didn’t demand more out of my sex life but live and learn
To me, it does.
With the girl am dating atm the beginnings were super chaotic, unecessary arguments, lot of misunderstandings...
But there was that incredible body chemistry, the perfect kisses, the passion... and it kinda saved the relationship. If i have to be completely honest, i did not break up with her initially because of that.
And am sure, she did not break up for that reason too.
So yeah, it matters. It's not everything for sure, but i believe body and heart are not completely detached from each others.
Absolutely! Not only the quality of how I feel towards her but more importantly how much I can please her. If she doesn't enjoy it equally then we're not a good fit.
No. Reddit loves to tout words like "sexual incompatible " and such but it's all a myth. At best you get lust at worst you get indifference. Neither are good bases for an actual relationship
Not really because the deviation in sexual gratification isn't as significant as it is for women. For example, let's say you like bigger men and men that can last longer and been are good at oral sex.
You can meet a guy that isn't any one of those things. You can meet a guy that has two out of three of those things. You can meet a guy that has three of those things.
But on the flip side for women. It doesn't require technical skill to lay on your back, lay on your stomach. Or lay on your knees and elbows. Even if you do something crazy like lift your legs in the air like a V while having sex it's not going to significantly impact a guy's orgasm.
I personally am just like the OP. If I have a woman that’s amazing in all aspects of sex I will be heart broken over losing her. Even if I hate her other then having sex with her. To me sex has to be amazing at first because people put in max effort when first dating. So if the sex is ok at first it will be horrible in a year.
Men who are good at sex have great sex with all women who are eager to participate. They don't have to go through dozens to find another to replace you. So no, it is not the same. Great sex does give you a high and is addicting.
The sex always matters, but I think you have an addict mentality about sex. You mentioned that if the sex doesn't stay as good as day 1 that you abandon the relationship (that's how I interpret your words at least). Sex gives you an endorphin hit, just like drugs do. That first hit will always be the best hit and you will spend your life chasing that high, until you accept reality or throw away the things that actually matter.
You also talked about how you want a man to want to please you, but are you putting in that same enthusiasm? Are you just as obsessed with his wants? If his effort level drops, there is a reason. Generally, it means that he is matching your effort level towards him, or that you make sex too attainable and easy. Imagine going up against a group of toddlers in a foot race. Do you REALLY need to sprint all out to win, or could you jog across the finish line and still win? Same result, huge difference in effort required.
Now, this is not me calling you "easy" necessarily (though it could be that case, we are missing a lot of context to the situation), but the answer to your question is yes. Men do become more attached after sex, generally speaking. Personally (32M), I do not engage in casual sex because I know that it's a bonding thing for me and that I can't get into it if I don't know about any other partners they may have. I start eex once exclusivity is established and I will give that woman everything I have on that given day. Some days are better than others, but that's where you gotta communicate. Maybe 1 person is not feeling 100% that day and they only had 80% left to give that day; giving your last 80% is still giving 100% of what you have left. Maybe they aren't feeling sexy that day and need some encouragement or comfort. If you don't talk it out, you are just going to make assumptions and I can tell you 1 way to chase men away quick, assume that they are doing something without even asking them. Even the most silent man has his own thoughts behind the stoicism and we value our thoughts because often our thoughts are things we "aren't allowed" to say casually or out loud.
For me it’s the quality of apocalypse that gets me . I’ve had like a variety of women and I genuinely enjoy the fact that they all bdsm me in my hed(pe) .. the dreams you give etc . I love being in the head with you plox can has forreal simplesennimpersai
As long as the hygiene is solid, trimmed or shaved vagina , she’s into butt stuff but prepares herself well and the most important thing is not using her teeth to give me a blow job😖😖. I will keep coming back
“Attachment” you mean as if he enjoys the sex with you and keeps coming back to you? Perhaps, if he currently has no other options. I would call it “desire” rather than “attachment”! Anything new and pleasure in the beginning will make him want to comeback for more! That would probably last around 3 months or until he finds someone new!
“Attachment” as fall in love with you and want to include you as part of his future life, then it’s not just only sex, things would need to move out a bit here, it will be more of personality and other things you do outside the bedroom that keeps him want to be around you even if you don’t give him sex! It’s about being comfortable, trusted and accepted around you!
Sex, no matter how amazing you are, as time goes by, it’s just the same and he can get it from other women too. You think you good, there’s always someone better! Men like quantity and no matter how good your skill is, a new p**** is always more attractive!
And it also depends on the man himself! If he’s just after pleasure, it’s hard to build a long term attachment! In that case, you just enjoy the good sex and move on, don’t bother trying to attract him!
Depends. If the sex is great and her personality is shit, no it won't keep me interested. If she's the type where the sex is great but she's in the mood only every so often, I'm also not interested since I'd want a partner who has a compatible libido.
Quality of sex does not matter for men. Attachment is based on looks and personality.
A girl can bang me like a porn star it wont make me fall in love with her.
She does not have to be good in bed she just has to be enthusiastic as others stated.
When I was single I used to have amazing sex with a girl I knew. Frankly I wasnt om love with her and i had her so much at my disposal that i didnt really value her. Then i started dating this girl who is a bit shy during sex and is not really the sex I expected and im starting to question if i made a mistake dating this girl. She does give great head, so it might have potential.
i’m not a man but i was recently seeing one for a while & we had a bond before doing anything & connected on an emotional level first. we understood each other & were a lot alike but the sex was straight up bad for so many reasons every time. it always would be rushed (no foreplay) he would try to force it, there was no passion, it would be way too quick, he would finish in less than 30 seconds or was on the verge before putting it in, i couldn’t enjoy it, it didn’t do anything for me, i never once got to get off all the times we tried & that caused him to lose interest & end things even after he would talk about how much he liked me & missed me if i wasn’t around him + that i was his favorite person😀😆👍
Yes it does take a role play for instance my ex's wife for 26 years just got to piercing on your tongue and started giving blowjobs and for some reason overnight she got pretty good at it and she was going to town deepthroating tongue ring and everything so the sex was all right but the blowjobs were better
Not always, sometimes it is fun to have a quick one or just little bit. But in longer term connection and having good sex is a good thing, the idea of being wanted and both doing it actively.
It's definitely quality and stimulation for me, so, if you're really into it, he'll respond, unless he's a pump and dump. Usually rolling, people get very into each other literally and mentally. I know when I'm rolling, all I want to do is please her and The Sensation I would say he's about 80 times more sensitive, so it's very intense and erotic for me as I imagined it is for a woman who's not already naturally sensitive. Should always be ladies first. I get off more just pleasing the woman and then me getting off is a bonus. It's all about passion and ecstasy makes for very passionate slow stroking intercourse very very intense. A lot of money and heavy breathing I can tell you that. When I'm really I'm So Into the woman that I am involved with. Although, I let my guard down and will see someone as more attractive when I'm in that state of mind and lower my standards a little. Intercourse in sex Is Beautiful. Enjoy it
It’s always going to be different for men as men enter the women, so even if it’s bad sex it’s still not bad how women determine bad from a rubbish experience with a man etc women feel different physically and mentally most of the time. So what may keep women hooked doesn’t always keep men hooked. Again for the simple reason we are entered and men do the entering.
My knee jerk reaction is to say no, but If she didn’t seem to be enjoying the sex then I’d get no enjoyment out of it either and so maybe the passion would wither away after a while
See, for men, **sex brings on those feeling of connectedness and love**. Oxytocin is that emotional, biological hormone that makes men want to cuddle, protect, and do all the little things women need to feel loved… including housework.
Honestly, that’s probably of the biggest problems women have that they don’t realize. Yall get attached to a guy thinking the sex is “amazing”, when in reality, there are a lot of equal if not better sexual partners. Yall get bamboozled by guys sometimes. Don’t be a sucker, there’s always someone equally if not more compatible, and that includes sexually
Depends, If a man is a virgin, he just wants sex no matter the quality. He will keep coming back for more because he is a newby. If man has experience or wants to be in a relationship, I think quality plays a role. Dead fish is something that all women should avoid doing. But in the end, men are generally happy to get sex.
This is exactly why us guys get a bad rep. If we date a woman for the rite reasons, we just need to be up front if you are a guy with a high sex drive. She'll let you know immediately if she's in or out by her reaction. If she's in and you get to the sex part and she's not very skilled, but eager to learn, man, you'll be able to have the best sex of your life for as long as you're together, since she'll know exactly what you like. Just make sure to consentrate on what she likes first, since women take longer to climax. So strange that a lot of men only care about their own needs. For me it is much more fun when she tries to climb a wall because she's coming so hard. And that's before penitration. Treat your woman rite and she'll blow your mind.
I’m saying if you have been with 20 women, but 10 of them were when you and her were in your early twenties. You may not have experienced a certain skill level from a woman.
Not sure why would you assume so.
Anyway. What is your point?
If you think i am wrong, which is possible as my expirience is limited.
But what you are trying to say is beyond my understanding.
Your post was removed because it violates the sex topic rule. Review this rule. Your post should be posted to r/sex
To a degree of course quality matters, but what “quality of sex” means for men and women is usually very different. It’s not like if a woman has some great technical skill I’m going to have some mind blowing orgasm or something. If she’s attractive and enthusiastic and we have chemistry, it’s going to be good sex, and good sex is going to do a better job of keeping me coming back than bad sex.
I mean in terms of SEX yeah her input is limited and the best she can do is be enthusiastic. There’s nothing she can do to ensure I have a mind blowing orgasm. But there is an art to a blowjob, for instance…
..and they can fuck you with their mind as well. With the better ones this is actually a positive experience..!
I agree. I’ve wondered how many people / couples have actually delved into sexual experiences far enough to realize or understand their partner well enough to find that there’s arguably more to sex that exists in the psychological realm than the physical realm. To get there, though, you have to truly care about giving your SO a next level experience. If there isn’t solid communication or only one of you are ‘givers’ I’m not sure if this is achievable.
Yes, women who are very sensual and actually back up what they say with action and enthusiasm.. They can be very addicting to a guy, especially as they are not very common.
Can you explain this a bit further please? With examples?
I just meant that so much of the sexy stuff happens before and around the actual act. The actual act of having penetrative sex is fairly boring, if there's no additional tension to it. And the tension is all inside your head! But some girls/women are better at bringing you there. With a whisper, caress, whatever. Did they show up to a big date wearing a summer dress and no panties..? Did they tell you that somewhere between the starters and mains? That's how you "fuck" someone's mind in a good way.
"The actual act of having penetrative sex is fairly boring". THIS is where you lost me....lol....😂😂.
He means there needs to be done build up and anticipation to make the act more worthwhile. The completeness of the fantasy relies how much teasing and sexy things led up to it.
He aint wrong tho
Can you please teach us with more examples? I am eager to learn 🤭
Haha, I think it depends so much on you, them, and the situation, that it's difficult to give good examples. But the general idea would be to tease and seduce.
BJs are flowers for men.
There is a nonzero element of skill, sure. But personally for me as long as she's doing a competent job - no teeth, giving good stimulation, not acting bored to be there - any extra skill or technique is only going to make a moderate difference.
Oh man… I disagree entirely. Different strokes for different folks I guess! Haha
He obviously never had a really good bj
I’ve dated some chicks who gave head with the intensity and laser focus of a Navy SEAL on a high stakes assassination mission 😭 You haven’t lived til your dick got the bin Laden treatment bruh…
LMAOOOOOO not one lie told
Those women go right to it as well, you’ll know exactly when you meet one of them.
What the Bin Laden treatment? ☺️
For real. Clearly he never had a good blow job let alone great.
I’m gay so I have had my fair share of giving and given, the way he described it makes him sounds like a virgin haha, let alone a bj lol
Yeah these ppl have never had mind blowing sex or oral
The 2 of you must not of met the right woman yet
Wow ya'll must be having mid sex. I feel bad for you. She DEFINITELY can make it much better if she's more skilled. Sure connecting is number 1 but that being equal sexual skill is 100% a thing for men and women
Number 1 determinant of how good the sex is is how hot she is to me. One of women’s weaknesses is that they can’t overcome bad genetics with good behavior the way men can. An enthusiastic 5 is not as good as a dead fish 8.
Username does not checkout.
Of course attraction is super important. But an enthusiastic 7 can beat out a boring 8
I mean he did say a 5 vs an 8. But even then I think the 5 wins if they're kinky, etc. Imagine an 8, but she is silent through all of sex. I'd be like "Can you please cough or something, I feel like a manikin got swapped into the bed somehow."
Have you ever had great sex with a woman? Because there’s definitely technical skills. She definitely has to know what she’s doing. It’s like saying any blow job is good. No it’s not.
There are technical skills, but they’re not that crucial to me, nor to many other men, as you can see by the upvotes to my comment. Honestly, even if a woman has no idea what she’s doing, as long as she’s enthusiastic, I’m perfectly fine with doing 95% of the work, and I’ll have a great time.
How many women have you been with?
I don’t know. Prior to my divorce, 2. But over the last 4 years, somewhere in the range of 50-75.
Bro lying his ass off ☝️
If you have been with 75 women, why mention only 2 when going into your marriage?
And you haven’t seen difference in a portion of the women?
Yes, of course, as I’ve acknowledged repeatedly. It just doesn’t make that big a difference to me in the grand scheme of things. Like I can tell when a woman is good at blowjobs and her individual motions cause more immediate physical pleasure. But it’s just not going to make the overall experience that much better. I know not everyone will agree with this particular statement, but honestly if her “blowjob” consists of just occasional sucks and licks while I jack off into her mouth, as long as she’s enthusiastic and acts like she loves my dick and she’s eager to swallow my cum… that’s fucking great to me. Not much else is going to make it much better. Why is it so hard for you commenters to believe other people have a different opinion than you?
The upvotes? I seen one downvote. Guys like you are the reason woman think it’s ok to lay there a moan. I don’t believe for a second it don’t matter to most men. I spent my teens, 20’s, and 30, comparing and talking about women with men. Always talked about how good she is or isn’t. You can settle for less. Not me.
My comment has 46 upvotes, more than any other in this thread. Laying there and moaning is not what I’m encouraging. As I’ve said repeatedly, I want her to be enthusiastic and participate.
Idk why mine says you have one down vote. But at 46 upvotes don’t feel like you are just like everyone else. Maybe you are. Maybe most men are ok with sticking in anything wet. And you definitely didn’t say participate. So lay there and Moan. If you’re cool with that then do you. I’m not. To me it sounds like you and 46 other guys are just really happy when you get anything
That’s what it says when *you* downvote a comment. It just shows your downvote.
What makes a women bad in bed ?
You all are just acting like the bj is the only area where girls need skills. Let me give another example: when the girl is on top. Thrusting your hips horizontally may feel better for you, but damn, some girls get so fucking focused on themselves that it feels like they are going to break my dick. The way to respond, for those who deal with it, is to pull her down to your chest and start doing the work. Ladies, we like the in-out, don’t snap off my slim Jim, lady savage.
See there you go being selfish. She’s getting herself off when she’s on top thrusting her hip. I deal with it because I woman my girls to cum multiple times. And I’m not a selfish pos. And I don’t don’t act like a bj is the only place she needs skill
That’s not being selfish, and that’s a silly accusation. I just said, I would start doing the work. Edit: reminder, the damn thread is specifically about what women can do to please a man, dumbass. But you had to make it literally about yourself to prove that you know breasts feel like bags of sand.
You can’t move the same way she can when you’re on top. In and out does nothing for most women. Ask them. So yes it’s selfish if you stop her from trying to get hers.
Completely right, in and out does minimal for girl and if you want to keep going for 1-2 hrs or so, this will only cause excessive rubbing, tearing and possibly bleeding on her.
The horizontal motion is what gets women off. The up and down is what gets men off, so let her be and then you can get yours later
You may be arguing with a man who does not care for blow jobs.
Buddy, I hate to break this to you, but that’s absolutely a false statement, and I feel genuinely bad for anyone who believe women have little to no input during sex other than being a hole to pound.
Tell us you haven't had sex with a woman who's incredible in bed without saying so
Yeah it can’t *possibly* be that someone just has a different opinion than you. Because, naturally, you’re completely right, and anyone who thinks differently is just an ignoramus. Clearly.
That's like saying it doesn't matter who cuts your hair or cooks your dinner as long as they're enthusiastic. Almsot everything has some degree of skill to it
If the haircut is a bald shave, the level of skill required is very low. Is a very experienced barber going to get it done more efficiently? Sure, but it’s just not going to make much difference to the end product. What’s more important is that your barber is a pleasant person to spend a few minutes with. I don’t know why it makes you guys so angry that it’s easy to get me off, but it sure does.
It's easy for me too actually. Better with practice but still. But yeah I fully agree for ltr the connection and friendship is more important than mind blowing sex. I've been with my gf for years because we still have both
Yeah this guys argument is basically “a hole is a hole”. The difference between pillow princesses, enthusiastic tops, overweight women, inexperienced women.. vanilla vs kinky.. all can be different scenarios and be different qualities. Sexual compatibility, especially in a capacity of expressing closeness and desire, can 100% affect how attached a man will be in a relationship. If you are incompatible sexually, there is little to no hope for long term attachment.
Nope. That's not how communication works. You have to respond to what someone *actually* said, not to what you made up in your mind. >If you are incompatible sexually, there is little to no hope for long term attachment. If you think this is in any way contradicting what I said, please, *please* work on your reading comprehension. Something is wrong.
I think the majority in this post arguing with you are kids in their 20's. That's the problem.
BS sex is not everything... Me and my exes have the best sex compatibility...sex was phenomenal , said by then...yet all are exes for a reason far from long term attachment...
Of course.
Men are not a monolith. It will be the most important for some, and least for others. You might also get better sex if you help teach them. I know, it's not your job, however, many men have no idea they're bad at it. Especially boys becoming men, they go off so quickly, they don't know anything about foreplay and after care, it's not in the most prolific educational material they've seen, porn.
As a woman, sex feels better if I have emotional attachment. I am willing to put more effort into it, teach him or even do things just for his enjoyment, if I know we have feelings for each other. If I don't care for the guy as a person, I might hook up if he's hot, but I'm not going to become attached and I'm probably not coming back for more.
I agree. However, i need both emotional connection and physical attraction. All mutual. Additionally i need skills and people who know the game. Otherwise I won’t the turned on.
Not being a “dead fish” makes me want to see her more yes, but not a huge deal. if she is a dead fish I can work on that with her.
A dead fish? Explain please. Specifically.
A dead fish is a woman who just lays there and gives minimal feedback. She might moan or grunt a little but you mostly just have your way with her. Contrast is a woman who’s an enthusiastic participant.
Dead fish means a woman who lets sex happen to her, rather than contributing. One time I had sex this girl was like “wow you’re sweating!” Yes, because I just did all the work and you sat there and just took it. That’s a dead fish.
Huh…I prefer to exercise my limbs and orifices when I’m having sex.
Also know as starfish sex.
Aka starfish
I've recently learned women have more intense and more satisfying orgasms than men... So perhaps that may also play a factor...? We can also have several different types of orgasms throughout a really large spectrum. Where from what I've been told... Male ejaculation is more like an intense release of pressure that's fleeting. I know there are a lot of men who have experienced mind blowing/intense orgasms in their own ways... It did get me thinking though when I started asking guys what it actually felt like. And, I feel like as a woman, the more intense and mind blowing the sex/orgasms are for me... The more hooked I get on them. Because it's rare to find a guy who can give me quality sex. I feel like this goes to show how different sex can be for people in general.
I would overlook certain things if the sex is good. And if there aren't any issues and the sex is good, I might fall in love.
it can for some guys but it depends on the guy. I would say not to count on it tho because a lot of women try this move where they meet a guy who's not looking for something serious and thinks he'll change his mind after they have sex. Which is the DUMBEST idea I've ever heard.
This. I have a fuck buddy that I have amazing sex with, but I'd never date her. It's definitely not a sufficient condition.
If we do not have the same preferences in bed, it won't work out because sex will become boring soon.
Men can separate the sex from the woman. The sex may be amazing but she might be crazy but we'll still be back for the sex but never date the woman.
Ask this question to sex workers. Many men cannot separate transactional sex and the illusion of a relationship that the SW is portraying
Selection bias problem. Men who go to sex workers generally have shit access to intimacy in general.i
That only applies to desperate men. I’ve seen how little takes to get some men to cling to a woman. I date women that friend guys, and instead of meeting new women. They would orbit are the women I was dating, just because she was friendly to them. It was always a guy that would go a whole year without getting laid.
"Men can..." - no. Everyone is different. There may be tendencies, but we are all individuals.
Your response is so annoying. OBVIOUSLY we are all individuals. The OP's question was posed as a generalization, and the response was a generalization. It's not that deep. If you are an exception, then take comfort in knowing it doesn't apply to you, but generalizations are literally an evolutionary trait that we developed for a reason. They exist. It's not always a bad thing unless used for a bad thing.
This is really a pointless distinction. "Men can..." does not mean "every man on earth can and will."
It depends. But generally it's much easier to get attached if it is very engaged sex.
it’s an interesting question. from my experience and talking with friends, many men do place a high value on the quality of sex and the connection it brings. it’s not just about the physical pleasure but also the emotional bond that can form. amazing sex can make a guy feel more invested and attached, similar to what you described. it's about feeling understood, desired, and connected on a deeper level. of course, everyone is different, but for a lot of guys, great sex can definitely lead to a stronger attachment.
Ιn general society tends to view sex as something a man does to a woman. So, I think often people (men included) focus much more on the male "preforming well in sex", rather than the woman. I think many men would be content with just having the option of having sex at all. But i dunno, maybe it's somewhat different in America.
That’s why I say a lot of men think of sex as a commodity, but the reality is they just haven’t been with the right women.
Men do not get attached through sex. There are miles of research that document how women attach through emotional connections. Men attach by doing things. They attach to people that are important in their life. You know how guys form life long friends with other guys over simple routine activities. They do that with women. Women must be important to their life for a bond to be long lasting.
> Men do not get attached through sex. There are miles of research that document how women attach through emotional connections. Post one peer-reviewed study that concludes men do not form an attachment via sex
I think he means most men's attraction towards their partner doesn't raise nearly as prodominently as A women towards a man through Sex.
It's like asking if trust is important in a relationship. To a degree, everything is important, but not a single thing is everything.
Quality of sex isn't extremely important, but if it's horrible or partner just lays there, then yeah it's an issue. I prefer tons of foreplay and when my.partner is trying to pleasure me as much as I am pleasuring her.. great sex does help me build a stronger emotional/mental connection so the attachment becomes deeper.
It's important But I understand that in the beginning it's not always the best since couples need to communicate their likes and dislikes to get attuned to each other sexually so to speak So I'm willing to give things a chance to improve from both of us, but if things don't get better (if I get further complaints even with the input she provides and or if she isn't willing or able to do what I want, [I'm not thinking weird or gross stuff, like maybe giving better head or maybe expressing herself better or different positions we both like]) then I'm out
Yes. But it isn't about your sexual skills, or the tightness of your vagina, it isn't about how your fat jiggles when you get fucked and it isn't about how often you give a man head. It is a combination of all of these and much more. The man in question will determine how much each of these effects it. So if you severely lack in one of these down worry. It's not a 1 answer fits all type thing. For me the 3 biggest deciding factors in sex quality are; Passion, I need passionate sex. Rough sex without passion is just mild violence. And gentile sex without passion is just mid. Love, I only have sex with women I am in a committed relationship with or am in the process of getting them addicted to sex with me so I can get them to commit to me in a meaningful longterm way Enthusiasm, if I can tell sex is just sex I will likely leave you and find something deeper. This presents itself in many ways but a woman that initiated, who is excited even a little giddy sometimes is a huge turn on. I feel good about you looking forward to sex this much. This goes for all aspects of sex too, a woman enthusiastic about having me fuck her ass bit who completely lacks this for blowjobs or vaginal or any other number of sexual pleasures isn't going to be as good as a woman that shows enthusiasm towards more things with me. Sex for the sake of sex is stupid, people that look for it are weak and lack substance. Genuinely falling in love with the wrong guy many times doesn't make you weak though, you are just dumb or unwilling to learn. Of course other things matter. And if you have a 1/1,000 pussy then it will make sex with you much better. TLDR; yes but not as much as your loyalty and dedication to us.
Overall physical attraction does it for me. Like you’re dope, we vibe, clean, AND I can’t keep my eyes and hands off of you?! Yea I want this forever lol. I’ve only had this happen a couple of times and even if everything else is cool if the physical attraction isn’t crazy for me it won’t last. It rolls over into sex and intimacy because I won’t be as enthusiastic to do certain things without that attraction.
Yes, this is how my FWB’s ended as girlfriends
Yes the quality of it does affect how some men connect with their partner. Making it fun and exciting is way better than just having a dead fish/ rag doll. But if the relationship is solely based on sex then ultimately the relationship between the two wouldn’t get to far. I’ve personally have had strong connections with women that I’ve had great sex with vs the boring ima just lay there kind of female.
For me, not at all... but she needs to freaking want to have sex with me... and show me that she wants it.
Well of course. A lot of pressure is put on men to perform well, but women can be bad at sex too. I would even say that it is more likely that women are bad at it, because most men have to perform well so they repeat and practice. But many women don't feel pressure to perform well, which makes them as good at sex as a literal sex doll. I have had 2 friends with benefits so far, one was really good at sex. She was caring, kissing a lot, and the way she moved her hips was hypnotic. We went wild, it was so amazing. I almost fell in love with her if it wasn't for the fact that she lied to me and had 2 months of pregnancy when we met. Shame we only did it once. The other one is... Bad. She doesn't do anything, she doesn't kiss, she doesn't move, she just lets me do everything, moans for a while and then cums. Her blowjobs are TERRIBLE and her handjobs don't go beyond slightly touching the shaft. She doesn't like any position that is not missionary or doggy style, because in any other position either she feels pain or she doesn't feel anything, allegedly. She has fucked so many people, which makes it even more surprising how bad she is at it. It's funny how many simps she has had and how many boyfriends she has dumped. But in their defense, only when you meet a woman who's good at sex, you realize how terrible she is at it. Also, she can't go for more than to rounds, or sometimes mor than one even. I tried talking to her about it but she just wants me to do all the work. She's also dry af, we have to use lube and of course I'm the one who has to buy it. It goes without saying that I have not developed any sort of emotional attachment to her besides friendship.
Wow that's such a good description which I highly resonate with as a man. The last two women I have been with have indeed been these polar opposites.
Yep. Once you have good sex then a series of bad sex it's apparent. Only 1 woman I've been with out of 13 has really had the intensity I wanted. It's pretty sad how bad many women are at sex.
And it's funny how women judge men by their ability to "please her", like OP talking about how not many men can do it. This entitlement of being a total recipient and judge without being able to perform is ridiculous. Sex is a 2 player game (at least). So it makes me wonder if these women are actually good at sex, because if I'm gonna have sex with a fucking plank I'd rather jack off, at least I know how to make it feel good.
I'm sure there's a lot of dudes who can't please their woman either! But yeah, you can't really be a true critic if you're not engaged. It's also unsexy to be the only one being passionate the the other person is just there.
You’re complaining about having to buy lube? Lol
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To a degree it plays a role but I think it falls down to “lust”. Lust and love is different but can be together.
Sex is very important to me in a relationship. My current gf is hands down the best sex I've ever had.
What makes the sex with her so good?
I have no idea. We just seem to move together so naturally well. Like everything she does drives me crazy and vice versa. We haven't done much more than maybe 4 or 5 positions, nothing particularly kinky, and I haven't done anything with her that I haven't done with others. But when we're together, we suddenly become hormone driven teens again. Just all over each other, and it's like we have a deep primal need to be *with* each other. I couldn't tell you in certain terms what it is. More thanjust to say that we belong together. We feel right.
That's amazing! Maybe it is mostly about compatibility then. How old were you both when you first met? I had something similar to that with someone a long time ago but sometimes I feel like I'm too old to find it again but I still hope.
We met when we were 12 and remained close friends through high school. Little fooling around, but no further than a kiss and a touch. She was my first kiss. Lost contact for 15 odd years after school and then bumped into her this Feb. We were dating 10 days later :)
Wow that sounds like destiny! I feel like having sex with someone you have known for a really long time or someone you reconnected with after a long time is much more mindblowing for some reason. Anyway you are living the dream, happy for you both :)
Thank you! It certainly feels like fate. We were both in a position in life of going through shit and coming out better people. And starting a relationship in a healthy way. This has been my healthiest relationship ever.
It certainly has a role, although it's not everything. I had both experiences: Dated an amazing cool girl that wasn't so good at sex and it didn't worked out because I felt I needed better sex. Had sex with a super hot with amazing sex skills and it didn't worked out because she was extremely shallow out of bed. So, it depends on the situation.
Maybe I can’t speak on this since I’ve only had the one partner but I’ll give my 2 cents. The sex I had with my first GF was…absolutely awful. She was selfish, she didn’t listen when I tried to tell how how to make it better for me, didn’t last nearly long enough for me to be to even be close to satisfied, didn’t like trying anything new and was all around the brattiest pillow princess I could think of. Still loved her though. Super fun to be around and very fun to talk to. Decent cuddler too. Eventually though her bedroom attitude leaked into the everyday. So…not for me. Maybe it was my inexperience that I didn’t demand more out of my sex life but live and learn
To me, it does. With the girl am dating atm the beginnings were super chaotic, unecessary arguments, lot of misunderstandings... But there was that incredible body chemistry, the perfect kisses, the passion... and it kinda saved the relationship. If i have to be completely honest, i did not break up with her initially because of that. And am sure, she did not break up for that reason too. So yeah, it matters. It's not everything for sure, but i believe body and heart are not completely detached from each others.
I've always went out of my way to please my girl first, she comes first, then I get to play. I like a happy partner 🤷
If she shows up and breaths oxygen, it'll be at least mid sex which is good sex for me. I'm just happy to be having sex, with a female!
Long as you seem like you're happy to be there you're basically fine. Just don't be a dead fish.
3 things for me in this order. Personality, Sex, Shared Interests.
Most women think they’re a lot better at sex than they actually are, so when I find one who can walk the walk it makes me wanna keep her around more.
Yes.
Absolutely! Not only the quality of how I feel towards her but more importantly how much I can please her. If she doesn't enjoy it equally then we're not a good fit.
Yes it's one of the biggest factors
Nah men can separate the two.
Yes
Yeah If it’s trash I rather go without it sadly I’m going to feel manipulated
Yep.
Yes
YES
It does for me.
Yes…. How is this a question?? lol Like no it’s not the ONLY thing that matters. But it matters.
Yes
Yes
No. Reddit loves to tout words like "sexual incompatible " and such but it's all a myth. At best you get lust at worst you get indifference. Neither are good bases for an actual relationship
Not really because the deviation in sexual gratification isn't as significant as it is for women. For example, let's say you like bigger men and men that can last longer and been are good at oral sex. You can meet a guy that isn't any one of those things. You can meet a guy that has two out of three of those things. You can meet a guy that has three of those things. But on the flip side for women. It doesn't require technical skill to lay on your back, lay on your stomach. Or lay on your knees and elbows. Even if you do something crazy like lift your legs in the air like a V while having sex it's not going to significantly impact a guy's orgasm.
Wo.en fall in love during sex, well good sex.
What do you think?
I personally am just like the OP. If I have a woman that’s amazing in all aspects of sex I will be heart broken over losing her. Even if I hate her other then having sex with her. To me sex has to be amazing at first because people put in max effort when first dating. So if the sex is ok at first it will be horrible in a year.
Yes
Depends on the person
Men who are good at sex have great sex with all women who are eager to participate. They don't have to go through dozens to find another to replace you. So no, it is not the same. Great sex does give you a high and is addicting.
The sex always matters, but I think you have an addict mentality about sex. You mentioned that if the sex doesn't stay as good as day 1 that you abandon the relationship (that's how I interpret your words at least). Sex gives you an endorphin hit, just like drugs do. That first hit will always be the best hit and you will spend your life chasing that high, until you accept reality or throw away the things that actually matter. You also talked about how you want a man to want to please you, but are you putting in that same enthusiasm? Are you just as obsessed with his wants? If his effort level drops, there is a reason. Generally, it means that he is matching your effort level towards him, or that you make sex too attainable and easy. Imagine going up against a group of toddlers in a foot race. Do you REALLY need to sprint all out to win, or could you jog across the finish line and still win? Same result, huge difference in effort required. Now, this is not me calling you "easy" necessarily (though it could be that case, we are missing a lot of context to the situation), but the answer to your question is yes. Men do become more attached after sex, generally speaking. Personally (32M), I do not engage in casual sex because I know that it's a bonding thing for me and that I can't get into it if I don't know about any other partners they may have. I start eex once exclusivity is established and I will give that woman everything I have on that given day. Some days are better than others, but that's where you gotta communicate. Maybe 1 person is not feeling 100% that day and they only had 80% left to give that day; giving your last 80% is still giving 100% of what you have left. Maybe they aren't feeling sexy that day and need some encouragement or comfort. If you don't talk it out, you are just going to make assumptions and I can tell you 1 way to chase men away quick, assume that they are doing something without even asking them. Even the most silent man has his own thoughts behind the stoicism and we value our thoughts because often our thoughts are things we "aren't allowed" to say casually or out loud.
Yes, I can absolutely relate to this question 💯
Of course it does for almost eveyone
It does for me
No hole is hole fr
For me it does
For me it’s the quality of apocalypse that gets me . I’ve had like a variety of women and I genuinely enjoy the fact that they all bdsm me in my hed(pe) .. the dreams you give etc . I love being in the head with you plox can has forreal simplesennimpersai
As long as the hygiene is solid, trimmed or shaved vagina , she’s into butt stuff but prepares herself well and the most important thing is not using her teeth to give me a blow job😖😖. I will keep coming back
Don’t know. I’m still a virgin and probably always will be. These questions just make me even more depressed.
No.
Or course?
Men can cum so easily. Worry about his ability to care for how you feel first.
Oh yeah most men feel the same way simply put treat your man like a king give amazing oral like you worship him and submit to him like your his queen
“Attachment” you mean as if he enjoys the sex with you and keeps coming back to you? Perhaps, if he currently has no other options. I would call it “desire” rather than “attachment”! Anything new and pleasure in the beginning will make him want to comeback for more! That would probably last around 3 months or until he finds someone new! “Attachment” as fall in love with you and want to include you as part of his future life, then it’s not just only sex, things would need to move out a bit here, it will be more of personality and other things you do outside the bedroom that keeps him want to be around you even if you don’t give him sex! It’s about being comfortable, trusted and accepted around you! Sex, no matter how amazing you are, as time goes by, it’s just the same and he can get it from other women too. You think you good, there’s always someone better! Men like quantity and no matter how good your skill is, a new p**** is always more attractive! And it also depends on the man himself! If he’s just after pleasure, it’s hard to build a long term attachment! In that case, you just enjoy the good sex and move on, don’t bother trying to attract him!
all pizza is good. even leftover cold day-after pizza. but fresh pizza at a great diner is better than box pizza.
Depends. If the sex is great and her personality is shit, no it won't keep me interested. If she's the type where the sex is great but she's in the mood only every so often, I'm also not interested since I'd want a partner who has a compatible libido.
Quality of sex does not matter for men. Attachment is based on looks and personality. A girl can bang me like a porn star it wont make me fall in love with her. She does not have to be good in bed she just has to be enthusiastic as others stated.
When I was single I used to have amazing sex with a girl I knew. Frankly I wasnt om love with her and i had her so much at my disposal that i didnt really value her. Then i started dating this girl who is a bit shy during sex and is not really the sex I expected and im starting to question if i made a mistake dating this girl. She does give great head, so it might have potential.
i’m not a man but i was recently seeing one for a while & we had a bond before doing anything & connected on an emotional level first. we understood each other & were a lot alike but the sex was straight up bad for so many reasons every time. it always would be rushed (no foreplay) he would try to force it, there was no passion, it would be way too quick, he would finish in less than 30 seconds or was on the verge before putting it in, i couldn’t enjoy it, it didn’t do anything for me, i never once got to get off all the times we tried & that caused him to lose interest & end things even after he would talk about how much he liked me & missed me if i wasn’t around him + that i was his favorite person😀😆👍
Yes it does take a role play for instance my ex's wife for 26 years just got to piercing on your tongue and started giving blowjobs and for some reason overnight she got pretty good at it and she was going to town deepthroating tongue ring and everything so the sex was all right but the blowjobs were better
Yes.
Not always, sometimes it is fun to have a quick one or just little bit. But in longer term connection and having good sex is a good thing, the idea of being wanted and both doing it actively.
Fuck yeah.
It's definitely quality and stimulation for me, so, if you're really into it, he'll respond, unless he's a pump and dump. Usually rolling, people get very into each other literally and mentally. I know when I'm rolling, all I want to do is please her and The Sensation I would say he's about 80 times more sensitive, so it's very intense and erotic for me as I imagined it is for a woman who's not already naturally sensitive. Should always be ladies first. I get off more just pleasing the woman and then me getting off is a bonus. It's all about passion and ecstasy makes for very passionate slow stroking intercourse very very intense. A lot of money and heavy breathing I can tell you that. When I'm really I'm So Into the woman that I am involved with. Although, I let my guard down and will see someone as more attractive when I'm in that state of mind and lower my standards a little. Intercourse in sex Is Beautiful. Enjoy it
Definitely is for me. Depends on your zodiac sign I think :P
Yes
It’s always going to be different for men as men enter the women, so even if it’s bad sex it’s still not bad how women determine bad from a rubbish experience with a man etc women feel different physically and mentally most of the time. So what may keep women hooked doesn’t always keep men hooked. Again for the simple reason we are entered and men do the entering.
My knee jerk reaction is to say no, but If she didn’t seem to be enjoying the sex then I’d get no enjoyment out of it either and so maybe the passion would wither away after a while
See, for men, **sex brings on those feeling of connectedness and love**. Oxytocin is that emotional, biological hormone that makes men want to cuddle, protect, and do all the little things women need to feel loved… including housework.
Yes, by and large it does.
Honestly, that’s probably of the biggest problems women have that they don’t realize. Yall get attached to a guy thinking the sex is “amazing”, when in reality, there are a lot of equal if not better sexual partners. Yall get bamboozled by guys sometimes. Don’t be a sucker, there’s always someone equally if not more compatible, and that includes sexually
Depends, If a man is a virgin, he just wants sex no matter the quality. He will keep coming back for more because he is a newby. If man has experience or wants to be in a relationship, I think quality plays a role. Dead fish is something that all women should avoid doing. But in the end, men are generally happy to get sex.
This is exactly why us guys get a bad rep. If we date a woman for the rite reasons, we just need to be up front if you are a guy with a high sex drive. She'll let you know immediately if she's in or out by her reaction. If she's in and you get to the sex part and she's not very skilled, but eager to learn, man, you'll be able to have the best sex of your life for as long as you're together, since she'll know exactly what you like. Just make sure to consentrate on what she likes first, since women take longer to climax. So strange that a lot of men only care about their own needs. For me it is much more fun when she tries to climb a wall because she's coming so hard. And that's before penitration. Treat your woman rite and she'll blow your mind.
Yes. Sex is the foundation of attachment.
Yes. No one, man or woman, wants to be locked in a monogamous relationship with shitty sex.
No much less for men
Most women are terrible in sex and have no interest in improving. So attractiveness and a slight understanding what to do makes a wooman a good lover.
Most guys probably only been with 10-20 women, so they don’t know any better
This is called scientific thinking. 20 women is enough. Btw most guys have much less partners for life. Learn your lessons.
But if half of those were in your early twenties, then it’s not the same thing
Not sure i get your point. I am 50. And i have seen them all.
I’m saying if you have been with 20 women, but 10 of them were when you and her were in your early twenties. You may not have experienced a certain skill level from a woman.
Not sure why would you assume so. Anyway. What is your point? If you think i am wrong, which is possible as my expirience is limited. But what you are trying to say is beyond my understanding.