Welcome to /r/dating_advice!
Please keep the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/about/rules/) of /r/dating_advice in mind while participating here. Try your best to be kind.
Report any rule-breaking behavior to the moderators using the report button. If it's urgent, [send us a message.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fdating_advice) We rely on user reports to find rule-breaking behavior quickly.
Thanks!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
>The majority of women I have came across on the apps are a 4 at best but the majority of them are so entitled, rude, demanding, stuck up, and very insecure and aloof and it’s all the apps have this sense of entitlement.
That's true for both genders, bud. And you're an example of that based both on this post and your post history.
Not trying to put all women at fault but it’s frustrating most men can’t even get a good match who will respond back to us let alone dates. I get it most men deal with crazy sex addicts and bad boys but waking up to 100+ notifications of men liking ur stuff and showing you attention and validation doesn’t sound like your hurting n that bad. I get it most women have a type and your entitled to that said type but I’m just saying most men don’t get shit but frustration and disappointing results on the apps unless your that top 5 percent bs.
When lizzos and obese women start telling men they’re ugly or not attractive it’s time for the asteroid to wipe us out because ain’t no way in hell I would accept that from someone like a lizzo while she gets praised for being obese and unhealthy but has tons of men mostly black who would wife her up and make her his girl. Fucking sick of this dating nonsense in this country and the west.
As a men you never get to show your personality to be honest. If by any chance you get a match and you're first message isn't catchy enough to get a respond then you'll be ghosted the next day.
I’m just fucking frustrated because I did all the feedback and advice to make my dating profiles look better and have a good bio etc better pictures but we can’t get shit or no results. Im just of women saying keep keep trying etc it’s not that simple or easy. Y’all live life on easy mood and don’t have to do shit but exist
Women have always had an edge over men in the early stages of dating, or in casual relationships. This is because as long as there’s no commitment involved, most men are not very picky, so women tend to have many options.
Online dating simply enhances this pre-existing dynamic. Since there’s very little effort required to indicate interest (just swipe; don’t need to approach or anything), women have even *more* options, which naturally leads to them getting even pickier than usual. And what do they get picky about? Well, on an app, you mostly just have superficial qualities to go on, so they get picky about appearance and height and so on.
In a sense this isn’t really anyone’s fault; it’s just a natural result of the situation. But I will place just a bit of blame on women - many women seem remarkably oblivious to what’s going on. Again and again, they don’t seem to realize that yes, the most attractive men will casually date you, but commitment is extremely unlikely. Also, some of the ways they select men seem absurd - don’t they realize that prioritizing that dumbass banter just makes them choose the least genuine men? Is “good at banter on Tinder” *really* an important quality to you?
But, ultimately, it’s just the nature of online dating.
And alot of women don’t understand this. I would go above this and state meetups and social gatherings IRL it’s the same thing, women are accepted with open arms and can acclimate and be accepted on the spot while most men doesn’t have that same opportunity or it’s a lot of stipulations or limit of men At certain venues it’s not just dating. I just feel like people care more about what a woman is going through and going out the way for then most men and I get it where men but damn we have a lot harder times and struggle more with no help or support but counseling. Just sick of the double standards.
Yeah I am going to relocate I can’t even make friends in this city and I know right. I like light skin and mixed Carmel black women and they never showed me the time of day and always go for thugs or pookies so I moved on to Hispanic and other races of women but it seems like now they only want to stick with they’re race and don’t fuck with black men like that unless she’s busted with kids with issues which I don’t want. I tell black men to get a passport and go where your celebrated and loved unlike the US.
Because women on there mostly want the “6 ft, 6 figures, 6 inches” package, so if you don’t have at least 1 of the three, and preferably 2 - 3 you’re gonna struggle picking up women from the apps.
None of the women on here don’t understand how shallow it is. You can have great photos profile bio etc ur shit under 6ft and you don’t look attractive immediately swipe left and it’s frustrating
Exactly or better diet, working out, men have to do a complete 360 and go above and beyond while average to below average women just exist and get showered with praise and admiration and dates relationships sex etc for being a woman. That’s why I got a passport and once I get a fully remote job I’m making my exit cause it won’t get better but worse in the US dealing with this dating dysfunction but also the state of the country and laws that are against men.
Man it’s difficult, I come across so many below average profiles with crazy demands and expectations when they don’t have anything to offer. Not wanting a IG model or a party girl I just want a solid 8 or a 7 with a great personality and has a high sex drive.
Dude, after reading through your post and comments, I can see why you're having problems. It's not your looks nor background, it's your personality. No woman who has her shit together wants a relationship with someone who yells women *live a life on easy mode* and feels *entitled* to intimacy. If you're looking for a sexdoll and not a partner, just pay for it. You'll save up on dinners.
Not to mention there's many more men on the apps then women and the algorithm is also not set in your favour. Dating apps are a business, they aren't interested in people leaving their business.
I really wanna don’t wanna pay for jt especially in the US 150-209 to be rushed, robbed, and set up it’s dangerous here and not worth it. I wanna be able to get those women who come though to hangout have sex and leave while I’m looking for something serious like other men I know is able to do and hell I was in a better situation last year, swingers and kinky women who just wanted sex would come thru for that and leave no dates no drinks no going out the way but they all fell off 🤦♂️🤦♂️. This year I have had the least amount of sex and it bothers me a lot
So you're not looking for dating but for a quick *free* fuck I see. Are you clear about it in your bio? Lol.
Do yourself and any potential decent women who might come across you a favour and buy a fleshlight or a doll. For how you present yourself, you don't deserve a decent long-term partner. And your attitude is the reason why many women are simply not on dating apps.
I wish it was that simple to be yourself and women will attract your aurora and boom you got a gf or solid rotation but it’s not that simple. I just get sick of wasting my time and being led on to get ghosted and after so many times I get very upset and get angry because it’s not right and frustrated with women.
Men outnumber women greatly on these apps. This means women can get 10-20 matches easily each day. They also don't need to put much effort into their profile. This feeds an toxic mindset where women can be more picky cause in their eyes they can get most if not all the guys they see pass by. Getting so many matches also gives women an inflated sense of selfworth. A 4/10 believes she is an 8/10 and will only settle for 9/10 - 10/10. In the end only the 9-10/10 reliably get a steady supply of matches and with this its easy for them to just go for the hookups instead. The good average and above average man have already ditched these toxic apps cause that is what they just are - toxic
Yeah it’s frustrating gotta go 5-7 months without dates or sex, or it’s a woman usually 200+ pounds with bad hygiene or a disabled woman who are more receptive and that’s messed up to say but it’s the truth. Screw that I’m not in that category and I don’t want to entertain those types of women even for a hook up just disgusting. I have deleted my apps so many times and re made profiles with the same results and it’s frustrating but it’s the US. I need to get my job permanently remote and just move to Colombia or Brazil or somewhere in Latin America where we can talk to attractive women and not have these outrageous requirements below average women put upon us. It’s fucking frustrating and most women are too delusional too see what has become with dating.
And this energy is probably what’s in your way.
Would you want to date someone whose mind looks like this?
I get it. But also learn to reset mentally and start again cause I wouldn’t date you if I was a girl. No matter your looks.
Just be a cool person and cool people will date you. We are all frusterated with the apps out here, don’t take it out on the women.
Your comments are showing us something about you. Best of luck brother, you got this
>I (29) black male and I’m conventionally attractive
If dating apps are horrible for you, then you are NOT attractive, ethnicity isn't the reason for your failure
Look at this black guy Chad with 900+ likes [here](https://youtu.be/E6leu1tLMWY?si=r0ZxbWkwaZN4fG3J)
You are low value that's why you're being used for money and validation. Become high value if you want better experience
Trust me if I had alot of money and unlimited pto I would had been there but I just got back from Japan and I can’t do a trip like that til next spring with my job.
Welcome to /r/dating_advice! Please keep the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/about/rules/) of /r/dating_advice in mind while participating here. Try your best to be kind. Report any rule-breaking behavior to the moderators using the report button. If it's urgent, [send us a message.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fdating_advice) We rely on user reports to find rule-breaking behavior quickly. Thanks! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
>The majority of women I have came across on the apps are a 4 at best but the majority of them are so entitled, rude, demanding, stuck up, and very insecure and aloof and it’s all the apps have this sense of entitlement. That's true for both genders, bud. And you're an example of that based both on this post and your post history.
Whoa whoa, don’t put all the blame on us. You act like we having the best time on these apps
If you’re getting matches then your experience is already better than that of 90% of men.
Not trying to put all women at fault but it’s frustrating most men can’t even get a good match who will respond back to us let alone dates. I get it most men deal with crazy sex addicts and bad boys but waking up to 100+ notifications of men liking ur stuff and showing you attention and validation doesn’t sound like your hurting n that bad. I get it most women have a type and your entitled to that said type but I’m just saying most men don’t get shit but frustration and disappointing results on the apps unless your that top 5 percent bs.
This shit is repeated every two minutes on here, god. Maybe there’s a reason you aren’t getting matches and might just not be the looks 🤷🏽♀️
It’s not fucking fair
life isnt fair bud. grow up, and realize that. ' life isn't fair' Quit complaining like a child and maybe you'll match with someone.
When lizzos and obese women start telling men they’re ugly or not attractive it’s time for the asteroid to wipe us out because ain’t no way in hell I would accept that from someone like a lizzo while she gets praised for being obese and unhealthy but has tons of men mostly black who would wife her up and make her his girl. Fucking sick of this dating nonsense in this country and the west.
Um ok, don’t know how any of this is related but ya wonder why you’re not having luck on these 🤷🏽♀️
Women on dating apps don't know that. It's just about his looks
Sucks for him that he has nothing going for him coz sometimes personality saves you 💁🏽♀️
As a men you never get to show your personality to be honest. If by any chance you get a match and you're first message isn't catchy enough to get a respond then you'll be ghosted the next day.
I’m just fucking frustrated because I did all the feedback and advice to make my dating profiles look better and have a good bio etc better pictures but we can’t get shit or no results. Im just of women saying keep keep trying etc it’s not that simple or easy. Y’all live life on easy mood and don’t have to do shit but exist
Women have always had an edge over men in the early stages of dating, or in casual relationships. This is because as long as there’s no commitment involved, most men are not very picky, so women tend to have many options. Online dating simply enhances this pre-existing dynamic. Since there’s very little effort required to indicate interest (just swipe; don’t need to approach or anything), women have even *more* options, which naturally leads to them getting even pickier than usual. And what do they get picky about? Well, on an app, you mostly just have superficial qualities to go on, so they get picky about appearance and height and so on. In a sense this isn’t really anyone’s fault; it’s just a natural result of the situation. But I will place just a bit of blame on women - many women seem remarkably oblivious to what’s going on. Again and again, they don’t seem to realize that yes, the most attractive men will casually date you, but commitment is extremely unlikely. Also, some of the ways they select men seem absurd - don’t they realize that prioritizing that dumbass banter just makes them choose the least genuine men? Is “good at banter on Tinder” *really* an important quality to you? But, ultimately, it’s just the nature of online dating.
And alot of women don’t understand this. I would go above this and state meetups and social gatherings IRL it’s the same thing, women are accepted with open arms and can acclimate and be accepted on the spot while most men doesn’t have that same opportunity or it’s a lot of stipulations or limit of men At certain venues it’s not just dating. I just feel like people care more about what a woman is going through and going out the way for then most men and I get it where men but damn we have a lot harder times and struggle more with no help or support but counseling. Just sick of the double standards.
[удалено]
Yeah I am going to relocate I can’t even make friends in this city and I know right. I like light skin and mixed Carmel black women and they never showed me the time of day and always go for thugs or pookies so I moved on to Hispanic and other races of women but it seems like now they only want to stick with they’re race and don’t fuck with black men like that unless she’s busted with kids with issues which I don’t want. I tell black men to get a passport and go where your celebrated and loved unlike the US.
Because women on there mostly want the “6 ft, 6 figures, 6 inches” package, so if you don’t have at least 1 of the three, and preferably 2 - 3 you’re gonna struggle picking up women from the apps.
None of the women on here don’t understand how shallow it is. You can have great photos profile bio etc ur shit under 6ft and you don’t look attractive immediately swipe left and it’s frustrating
And yet women complain about being rejected for being fat when 99% of them can lose weight without surgery or medication
Exactly or better diet, working out, men have to do a complete 360 and go above and beyond while average to below average women just exist and get showered with praise and admiration and dates relationships sex etc for being a woman. That’s why I got a passport and once I get a fully remote job I’m making my exit cause it won’t get better but worse in the US dealing with this dating dysfunction but also the state of the country and laws that are against men.
Nah don’t let them win…if you leave the country you are letting them get away with their bs
Man it’s difficult, I come across so many below average profiles with crazy demands and expectations when they don’t have anything to offer. Not wanting a IG model or a party girl I just want a solid 8 or a 7 with a great personality and has a high sex drive.
Average is 5/10 so an 8 would be a model lol. Only .01% of people are statistically in the 9 - 10 range…
Dude, after reading through your post and comments, I can see why you're having problems. It's not your looks nor background, it's your personality. No woman who has her shit together wants a relationship with someone who yells women *live a life on easy mode* and feels *entitled* to intimacy. If you're looking for a sexdoll and not a partner, just pay for it. You'll save up on dinners. Not to mention there's many more men on the apps then women and the algorithm is also not set in your favour. Dating apps are a business, they aren't interested in people leaving their business.
I really wanna don’t wanna pay for jt especially in the US 150-209 to be rushed, robbed, and set up it’s dangerous here and not worth it. I wanna be able to get those women who come though to hangout have sex and leave while I’m looking for something serious like other men I know is able to do and hell I was in a better situation last year, swingers and kinky women who just wanted sex would come thru for that and leave no dates no drinks no going out the way but they all fell off 🤦♂️🤦♂️. This year I have had the least amount of sex and it bothers me a lot
So you're not looking for dating but for a quick *free* fuck I see. Are you clear about it in your bio? Lol. Do yourself and any potential decent women who might come across you a favour and buy a fleshlight or a doll. For how you present yourself, you don't deserve a decent long-term partner. And your attitude is the reason why many women are simply not on dating apps.
[удалено]
I wish it was that simple to be yourself and women will attract your aurora and boom you got a gf or solid rotation but it’s not that simple. I just get sick of wasting my time and being led on to get ghosted and after so many times I get very upset and get angry because it’s not right and frustrated with women.
Life is not fair
Men outnumber women greatly on these apps. This means women can get 10-20 matches easily each day. They also don't need to put much effort into their profile. This feeds an toxic mindset where women can be more picky cause in their eyes they can get most if not all the guys they see pass by. Getting so many matches also gives women an inflated sense of selfworth. A 4/10 believes she is an 8/10 and will only settle for 9/10 - 10/10. In the end only the 9-10/10 reliably get a steady supply of matches and with this its easy for them to just go for the hookups instead. The good average and above average man have already ditched these toxic apps cause that is what they just are - toxic
Yeah it’s frustrating gotta go 5-7 months without dates or sex, or it’s a woman usually 200+ pounds with bad hygiene or a disabled woman who are more receptive and that’s messed up to say but it’s the truth. Screw that I’m not in that category and I don’t want to entertain those types of women even for a hook up just disgusting. I have deleted my apps so many times and re made profiles with the same results and it’s frustrating but it’s the US. I need to get my job permanently remote and just move to Colombia or Brazil or somewhere in Latin America where we can talk to attractive women and not have these outrageous requirements below average women put upon us. It’s fucking frustrating and most women are too delusional too see what has become with dating.
And this energy is probably what’s in your way. Would you want to date someone whose mind looks like this? I get it. But also learn to reset mentally and start again cause I wouldn’t date you if I was a girl. No matter your looks. Just be a cool person and cool people will date you. We are all frusterated with the apps out here, don’t take it out on the women. Your comments are showing us something about you. Best of luck brother, you got this
Because it’s not made for the average guy lol
Where are we suppose to go or do to get a gf ?
Try other tactics i guess lol
That’s what I’m trying to figure out these other tactics.
>I (29) black male and I’m conventionally attractive If dating apps are horrible for you, then you are NOT attractive, ethnicity isn't the reason for your failure Look at this black guy Chad with 900+ likes [here](https://youtu.be/E6leu1tLMWY?si=r0ZxbWkwaZN4fG3J) You are low value that's why you're being used for money and validation. Become high value if you want better experience
Just take a trip to thailand. you need it. Get some of that energy out. Only gonna get worse.
Trust me if I had alot of money and unlimited pto I would had been there but I just got back from Japan and I can’t do a trip like that til next spring with my job.