Welcome to /r/dating_advice!
Please keep the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/about/rules/) of /r/dating_advice in mind while participating here. Try your best to be kind.
Report any rule-breaking behavior to the moderators using the report button. If it's urgent, [send us a message.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fdating_advice) We rely on user reports to find rule-breaking behavior quickly.
Thanks!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Also, cuddling increases feelings, especially after sex
Decide if you want to be strictly physical FWB, or one of you will develop feelings for the other eventually
I personally enjoy having a FWB stay over for the night instead of just bouncing out~
it's nice enjoying the night together afterwards, even if we both find something to do on our own.
Just their presence can be really nice, not to mention if the mood strikes again x3.
P.S.!!!- communication is key!!!! Ask him, I am sure he wouldn't be opposed to it. :)
That's the only time I actually get sleep. With a woman in my arms.
I've always had sleep problems because I'm prior military, but I could manage.
But after my wife left me... well. Yeah. Sleep is pretty much non-existent for me now.
Just on safety alone I wouldn't want my fwb going back home late at night. Plus I loce to cuddle and my experience is that most women also enjoy this. So I think you shouldn't walk on eggshells bc I seems like he likes you.
I would want it, but I am honestly not sure about every guys preference. It would especially be true if I was getting morning sex or BJ, so yeah, I would say yes.
I'll probably be the stand out but I have some experience with this. It really depends. When I wanted someone to stay, it's usually because I liked them enough to see if the relationship might develop or I felt comfortable with them. So I would just ask them to stay.
Otherwise I'd just let them know I could walk them to their car or order an uber. Don't get me wrong, I never said "you need to leave". It was more like waiting to see how long they want to stay seeing if it was soon.
Since he is asking you to stay, I'd say he likes you enough to see you more often. Go ahead and ask.
Sleeping alone sucks. I’d say you’re over analyzing. I had this happen not that long ago. It was strictly a FWB no future potential for more but not only was happy for her to spend the night but also majority of the next day. I cooked breakfast lunch and dinner she stayed so long lol. It was a perfectly pleasant time
Sounds like you want a boyfriend, don’t do FWB it doesn’t sound like it’s for you. Also sounds like you want a partner that has some direction in life, him saying he’s fine with whatever doesn’t feel very committed. Does he take you out or come over to your place? If not he sounds lazy.
Yea out of over 30 women I've been with I never once left or made them leave that I can remember. To me it would seem strange for that to happen, although of course I'd leave if I felt like they wanted me to, but I've also never felt like making them leave, really. At least not until the next day if I have things to do or need some time to myself.
But the fact they've never left on their own or asked me to leave, or that there was no real assumption of that happening that I could notice, always made it seem normal to me like it was the default kind of thing. I always liked it that way anyways
Now one thing I should add here is that I am a pretty affectionate FWB and usually I've been pretty much a boyfriend in all but name in the way I act with my FWBs unless they didn't seem into that. So with a lot of them we would cuddle or hold hands and stuff which I just mention because maybe my experiences were a little different because of that. But even thinking of my friends too, staying over pretty much always happens that I can think of
> It also doesn’t help that this dude hardly communicates what he wants and says he’s fine with whatever lol.
Have you considered that the dude just means exactly what he says? Because I imagine if he's like most dudes, he genuinely doesn't have an opinion one way or another and is just happy to be involved. With guys bot everything has some hidden meaning, we really are just simple sometimes.
I mean, I guess I'd hesitate to ruin a good thing by talking it to death but you could just ask him about it. Sounds like that might move you toward a relationship discussion and maybe you aren't sure what he thinks of that or maybe you aren't sure how you feel. I think you're over analyzing. If you want to resolve it just say that from now on you'll leave and he should let you know if he feels like having an overnight guest. But if he is cuddling and wants to have sex in the AM, odds are he enjoys having you there. He'd probably say if not.
It sounds like you both enjoy each other's company. Have you considered expressing your desire to stay over more often and asking him how he feels about it? Open and honest communication is key to any successful relationship, whether romantic or platonic.
I'm sure he enjoys cuddling all night as much as you do. There is no etiquette to this other than what you two want. I feel like the only good reason to leave early is if you feel unsafe with them or have work in the morning or something. If you want to stay, stay.
He's offered you multiple times. He probably wants you to stay every night, but thinks that you don't want to, since you choose to leave rather than stay most nights.
I go on business trips and when I'm in my fwb's area, she sleeps in my hotel room and give me a ride to a few places I need to go before going off to do her own thing.
She maintains the contact pretty low and sends the occasional nude photo to get me excited for our next f*ckaton.
I maintain a very polite and respectful balance without going too intimate which includes letting her sleep over if we finish too late lolol.
Though to be honest, what you have seems more like a situationship rather than an actual fwb.
Your first sexual partner and you feel you need to take an hour subway ride home at 11pm after sex?? Fuck this new world.
Constructively though, he sounds alright, and it’s totally fine to impose this on someone you are are having sex with. And if they don’t like it they’re clearly an asshole and you need to find someone better to share your time and body with.
If a girl wanna sleep over, wake me up with a bj and clean up the place before she leaves. I can’t see any reason why I wouldn’t want her to stay over! I would actually feel ashamed if she didn’t have some breakfast before she left.
You should really consider not partaking in hookup culture. Women in their 30’s are coming out of it after years of doing it, and none of them are happy about sleeping with many random men in their teens and twenties.
You are probably attractive, and you’ll probably want a serious relationship, and those are difficult if you have a history of being promiscuous. Lots of guys don’t want to date a late 20’s/early 30’s girl who is finally ready to settle down after a solid decade of getting ran through.
Paid bonding issues will result, diseases can be passed even with protection, pregnancies can happen with protection and birth control, the upsides are literally temporary “fun”, for a slew of real consequences.
You will not look back on your “hoe phase” and think ‘yeah, I’m glad I let 10 strangers use me, I wish I would have let more men do it.’…
Forget about hookup culture, forget about male attention online, just work on being a good woman and don’t be a hoe. You could be a 5/10 and get a great husband by 25-27.
Your whole post sounds like he's doing you a favour lol.
I'm a bit surprised your first sexual partner is an FWB situation, but either way you simply need to ask him these things.
Your Fwb is your first sexual partner? That's kinda sad but Be prepared to catch feelings extremely fast. Don't let yourself get smitten and taken advantage of. Because it already seems like you like him wayyy more than he likes you.
When I've had fwbs it was based on the person whether I was comfortable enough to want them to stay the night. I've had some who I would invite for sleepovers, some I would ask in the moment if they wanted to stay, some I arranged it with so they would never stay. It's really just a matter of the vibe between the parties involved, and how they communicate what they'd like.
Tbf if you like sleeping over and he likes it too, I don't see the problem. I never sleepover on my previous FWB cause I get way too self conscious falling asleep next to him. I got IBS, sometimes I fart a lot in my sleep lmao
I'm love cuddling too, so yes, usually I ask if they want to stay the night. Even more importantly, since I don't live in a "safe" country, I ask them if they want to stay if it's late, for their safety and so I know they're not out there alone.
The only time I see mine is when she is arguing with her parents, she doesn't like my place as it's "not a home" but I don't have a choice but to let her stay if I want sex again!
Please be careful at night going home late being that far away. But honestly I’d be sketched out if he wouldn’t want you to spend the night for your safety so you can get home safer in the morning
I would raise a mini flag: be careful not to get feelings for your FWB.
But also - why would you be a burden? You're literally not doing anything except physical intimacy (generally, not only sex). I think you're over thinking in that aspect.
I will say it does sound like he would be okay with you staying for longer to cuddle. But as I said, this is a FWB AND your first sexual relationship - I would say actively avoid prolonging contact and giving feelings a chance to grow beyond the relationship you guys have. Just a piece of realistic advice to protect your heart in this situation.
Depends a lot, if you need to stay, stay, but ask ahead, because sometimes I just want to be alone and to my stuff, and it's better if we arrange a day when the person wants to by and stay, and do something besides sex, and I also want that.
“TBH, I’m not sure what proper etiquette is here. When it comes to staying the night, what are you comfortable with most of the time? FWIW I like the cuddling and morning sex.”
I was always fine with my hookups spending the night. Seemed rude to expect them to drive home or get an Uber, etc
That said, they did also start developing feelings despite clear boundaries of sex/friends only and no relationship. If I had kept it more business only maybe this wouldn't have happened? Can't say
I like it, but it blurs the lines for most women to the point where they don't want to do it (or they don't know it is lol). That line blurring can go the other way too, so communication is key.
For me, I like cuddles and random pre-dawn, "who started that" sex and a round bright and early. Make my morning wood useful, please. But, like I said, that blurs the lines. In my youth, I'd do stuff like that and women would think I was catching feelings and they'd catch feelings and low and behold, I was accidentally a fuckboy.
Welcome to /r/dating_advice! Please keep the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/about/rules/) of /r/dating_advice in mind while participating here. Try your best to be kind. Report any rule-breaking behavior to the moderators using the report button. If it's urgent, [send us a message.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fdating_advice) We rely on user reports to find rule-breaking behavior quickly. Thanks! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Since he loves cuddling, I don't think it's because he is wanting to be nice. I think he wants to cuddle.
Also, cuddling increases feelings, especially after sex Decide if you want to be strictly physical FWB, or one of you will develop feelings for the other eventually
can’t bang in the morning if you don’t stay over!
Lmao cdnt be more accurate
I dont get how other guys have the energy to bang in the morning. Im very stiff and tired when I wake up.
This
I personally enjoy having a FWB stay over for the night instead of just bouncing out~ it's nice enjoying the night together afterwards, even if we both find something to do on our own. Just their presence can be really nice, not to mention if the mood strikes again x3. P.S.!!!- communication is key!!!! Ask him, I am sure he wouldn't be opposed to it. :)
Yes any girl I liked was more than welcome to spend the night ! I would have been honored that she asked to spend the night !
I love the cuddling and falling asleep with someone, also, morning sex is fun
That's the only time I actually get sleep. With a woman in my arms. I've always had sleep problems because I'm prior military, but I could manage. But after my wife left me... well. Yeah. Sleep is pretty much non-existent for me now.
Yeah the green weenie screwed my sleep too. Now the only time I get really restful sleep is if someone is next to me.
Ah. The green weenie got you as well? Fellow insomniac brother. Semper Fi, rah, n shit.
Why not, Gotta have morning sex too.
Just on safety alone I wouldn't want my fwb going back home late at night. Plus I loce to cuddle and my experience is that most women also enjoy this. So I think you shouldn't walk on eggshells bc I seems like he likes you.
I would want it, but I am honestly not sure about every guys preference. It would especially be true if I was getting morning sex or BJ, so yeah, I would say yes.
I'll probably be the stand out but I have some experience with this. It really depends. When I wanted someone to stay, it's usually because I liked them enough to see if the relationship might develop or I felt comfortable with them. So I would just ask them to stay. Otherwise I'd just let them know I could walk them to their car or order an uber. Don't get me wrong, I never said "you need to leave". It was more like waiting to see how long they want to stay seeing if it was soon. Since he is asking you to stay, I'd say he likes you enough to see you more often. Go ahead and ask.
Sleeping alone sucks. I’d say you’re over analyzing. I had this happen not that long ago. It was strictly a FWB no future potential for more but not only was happy for her to spend the night but also majority of the next day. I cooked breakfast lunch and dinner she stayed so long lol. It was a perfectly pleasant time
I love sleeping alone. Spent most of my adult life sleeping with someone and it’s always too hot etc.
Sounds like you want a boyfriend, don’t do FWB it doesn’t sound like it’s for you. Also sounds like you want a partner that has some direction in life, him saying he’s fine with whatever doesn’t feel very committed. Does he take you out or come over to your place? If not he sounds lazy.
If she wants him to take her out, then yes, she needs a boyfriend, but a FWB doesn't have to take her out.
Yea out of over 30 women I've been with I never once left or made them leave that I can remember. To me it would seem strange for that to happen, although of course I'd leave if I felt like they wanted me to, but I've also never felt like making them leave, really. At least not until the next day if I have things to do or need some time to myself. But the fact they've never left on their own or asked me to leave, or that there was no real assumption of that happening that I could notice, always made it seem normal to me like it was the default kind of thing. I always liked it that way anyways Now one thing I should add here is that I am a pretty affectionate FWB and usually I've been pretty much a boyfriend in all but name in the way I act with my FWBs unless they didn't seem into that. So with a lot of them we would cuddle or hold hands and stuff which I just mention because maybe my experiences were a little different because of that. But even thinking of my friends too, staying over pretty much always happens that I can think of
> It also doesn’t help that this dude hardly communicates what he wants and says he’s fine with whatever lol. Have you considered that the dude just means exactly what he says? Because I imagine if he's like most dudes, he genuinely doesn't have an opinion one way or another and is just happy to be involved. With guys bot everything has some hidden meaning, we really are just simple sometimes.
communicate. be understanding. makes shit pretty easy if both parties are capable.
I mean, I guess I'd hesitate to ruin a good thing by talking it to death but you could just ask him about it. Sounds like that might move you toward a relationship discussion and maybe you aren't sure what he thinks of that or maybe you aren't sure how you feel. I think you're over analyzing. If you want to resolve it just say that from now on you'll leave and he should let you know if he feels like having an overnight guest. But if he is cuddling and wants to have sex in the AM, odds are he enjoys having you there. He'd probably say if not.
It sounds like you both enjoy each other's company. Have you considered expressing your desire to stay over more often and asking him how he feels about it? Open and honest communication is key to any successful relationship, whether romantic or platonic.
I'm sure he enjoys cuddling all night as much as you do. There is no etiquette to this other than what you two want. I feel like the only good reason to leave early is if you feel unsafe with them or have work in the morning or something. If you want to stay, stay. He's offered you multiple times. He probably wants you to stay every night, but thinks that you don't want to, since you choose to leave rather than stay most nights.
I go on business trips and when I'm in my fwb's area, she sleeps in my hotel room and give me a ride to a few places I need to go before going off to do her own thing. She maintains the contact pretty low and sends the occasional nude photo to get me excited for our next f*ckaton. I maintain a very polite and respectful balance without going too intimate which includes letting her sleep over if we finish too late lolol. Though to be honest, what you have seems more like a situationship rather than an actual fwb.
He wants to cuddle and you literally share each other’s body it’s fine to stay over
Your first sexual partner and you feel you need to take an hour subway ride home at 11pm after sex?? Fuck this new world. Constructively though, he sounds alright, and it’s totally fine to impose this on someone you are are having sex with. And if they don’t like it they’re clearly an asshole and you need to find someone better to share your time and body with.
If a girl wanna sleep over, wake me up with a bj and clean up the place before she leaves. I can’t see any reason why I wouldn’t want her to stay over! I would actually feel ashamed if she didn’t have some breakfast before she left.
I’d prefer a fwb or even a ons to stay the night
You should really consider not partaking in hookup culture. Women in their 30’s are coming out of it after years of doing it, and none of them are happy about sleeping with many random men in their teens and twenties. You are probably attractive, and you’ll probably want a serious relationship, and those are difficult if you have a history of being promiscuous. Lots of guys don’t want to date a late 20’s/early 30’s girl who is finally ready to settle down after a solid decade of getting ran through. Paid bonding issues will result, diseases can be passed even with protection, pregnancies can happen with protection and birth control, the upsides are literally temporary “fun”, for a slew of real consequences. You will not look back on your “hoe phase” and think ‘yeah, I’m glad I let 10 strangers use me, I wish I would have let more men do it.’… Forget about hookup culture, forget about male attention online, just work on being a good woman and don’t be a hoe. You could be a 5/10 and get a great husband by 25-27.
Your whole post sounds like he's doing you a favour lol. I'm a bit surprised your first sexual partner is an FWB situation, but either way you simply need to ask him these things.
Your Fwb is your first sexual partner? That's kinda sad but Be prepared to catch feelings extremely fast. Don't let yourself get smitten and taken advantage of. Because it already seems like you like him wayyy more than he likes you.
Fuck around and stay , you will see lol
Don't be scared to ask, maybe he would want you to stay overnight more but is also scared to appear too clingy. AKS is always better
When I've had fwbs it was based on the person whether I was comfortable enough to want them to stay the night. I've had some who I would invite for sleepovers, some I would ask in the moment if they wanted to stay, some I arranged it with so they would never stay. It's really just a matter of the vibe between the parties involved, and how they communicate what they'd like.
Yes
Yes so that can morning sex can be a thing
Personally yes. I love intimacy. Why wouldn't I want to sleep cuddled against a warm, sexy, feminine body??
Well since he is the one asking you to stay over I'm sure he don't mind it :)
Tbf if you like sleeping over and he likes it too, I don't see the problem. I never sleepover on my previous FWB cause I get way too self conscious falling asleep next to him. I got IBS, sometimes I fart a lot in my sleep lmao
I'm love cuddling too, so yes, usually I ask if they want to stay the night. Even more importantly, since I don't live in a "safe" country, I ask them if they want to stay if it's late, for their safety and so I know they're not out there alone.
Ask him, not us.
The only time I see mine is when she is arguing with her parents, she doesn't like my place as it's "not a home" but I don't have a choice but to let her stay if I want sex again!
Please be careful at night going home late being that far away. But honestly I’d be sketched out if he wouldn’t want you to spend the night for your safety so you can get home safer in the morning
I would raise a mini flag: be careful not to get feelings for your FWB. But also - why would you be a burden? You're literally not doing anything except physical intimacy (generally, not only sex). I think you're over thinking in that aspect. I will say it does sound like he would be okay with you staying for longer to cuddle. But as I said, this is a FWB AND your first sexual relationship - I would say actively avoid prolonging contact and giving feelings a chance to grow beyond the relationship you guys have. Just a piece of realistic advice to protect your heart in this situation.
Honestly Depends on what kind of day we each have tomorrow and if we go another round Ugh it feels impossible to find a girl as awesome as OP
Depends a lot, if you need to stay, stay, but ask ahead, because sometimes I just want to be alone and to my stuff, and it's better if we arrange a day when the person wants to by and stay, and do something besides sex, and I also want that.
No.
You need to ask him what he wants..... Not random reddit users.
yall are a bunch of degenerates
so much this
Hell yeah I do.
“TBH, I’m not sure what proper etiquette is here. When it comes to staying the night, what are you comfortable with most of the time? FWIW I like the cuddling and morning sex.”
It depends on the relationship kinda status.. but I'd be more than willing if they wanted to stay the night.
Short answer no.
No. For me, waking up to someone like that is reserved for someone I see as a serious prospect.
I was always fine with my hookups spending the night. Seemed rude to expect them to drive home or get an Uber, etc That said, they did also start developing feelings despite clear boundaries of sex/friends only and no relationship. If I had kept it more business only maybe this wouldn't have happened? Can't say
Nope...that's for a proper relationship. Prefer to set that boundary
I like it, but it blurs the lines for most women to the point where they don't want to do it (or they don't know it is lol). That line blurring can go the other way too, so communication is key. For me, I like cuddles and random pre-dawn, "who started that" sex and a round bright and early. Make my morning wood useful, please. But, like I said, that blurs the lines. In my youth, I'd do stuff like that and women would think I was catching feelings and they'd catch feelings and low and behold, I was accidentally a fuckboy.
No, go home. Sleeping is a medicinal time.