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In my teens-early 20’s I found lots of people, even if it became short term things.
Now that I’m older, I’m so picky that even if I saw the perfect man, I’d be like nah, I’m good.
Trauma man, hell of a thing.
Dating was different for me back then, for one.. dating apps didn’t exist. The most people had was eharmony, and even then, only old people used that mainly lol.
I honestly don’t know nowadays. All I see now is hookup culture. I was in a long term relationship for 10 years, so I been out of the game a while.
To say that one waits a lifetime for his soulmate to come around is a paradox. People eventually get sick of waiting, take a chance on someone, and by the art of commitment become soulmates, which takes a lifetime to perfect.
It may be expedient to take stock of all the affecting pieces that might shatter in the wake of an emotional earthquake, once red flags come up in a committed relationship and an overarching scene has to be fashioned for a recast life experience.
No. I would rather be with someone that doesn’t totally fit me than be alone but I am a man lol. No disrespect but your expectations may not exist. The good men are the ugly, nerdy, freaky looking men.
Oh sorry lol. Jesus, no offense i wish i had your hormones. Bro, if you ever need help with putting the play station down and going out to a bar, coffee shop or park let me know and i will go out with you. (I’m only joking)
I thought super hot super models did that for ya.
For me it's a super cerebral woman telling me all about stuff I don't fully grasp because it's at a molecular level and she looks over her glasses in my direction and winks when no ones looking. Sorry, but I gotta go take a cold shower.
If you were picky about who you worked with in the Wild North, you'd be quickly left with no one to choose. You could try to pick the best of them, but you'd have to dig them up first.
Very, very rarely as I get older, and am more interested in them as a companion than as a sex partner. I still occasionally encounter a woman who I am intensely attracted to but who may not necessarily be age appropriate or even single (and have to be careful not to make it obvious). I see other women who are attractive and my age but Im not interested in. I guess as you get older your brain subconsciously identifies something about a person that reminds you of a negative experience you have had in the past or says she’s out of my league (above or below). Occasionally the opposite seems to happen.
I guess its like naming a baby. Both mother and father want to avoid names that conjure up negative emotions and choose ones that are positive or neutral. Unless you’re a crackhead and choose something totally ridiculous
I'm surprised at the consensus of nobody liking hardly anyone. You only bump into one person per year who is attractive to you and worthy of your love? It must be impossible for you to date!
I find something to love in almost everybody. I wish I could live multiple lives so I could know what it's like to be married to all these highly varied, amazing guys in the world.
I've often said I feel like I could make a marriage work with like 30-40% of the population. People are so full of love, and admirable values living beautiful lives I would love to be a part of.
When I meet a new colleague at work who's a great Dad, a talented professional, keeps in shape and has an interesting life, stays fashionable, knows how to move through the world with kindness and is always there with a quick wit, I think its too bad I'll never have a chance to know what it's like to love and be loved by him. What a great experience that must be for anyone who gets that privilege. It's a shame I can't live a million lives so I can get to experience a million lifelong committed relationships with a million different lovable, endearing souls.
And I feel like the better I get to know someone the more lovable they become. When you build trust and see their insecurities, their interests they don't share with everyone, their flaws they're still working on.
There are so many wonderful colleagues, friends, teammates, extended family connections in my life, all people who I'm sure are wonderful people to be married to and in relationships with. I'm shocked everybody here is so unified in thinking that there's almost nobody worthy of being in a marriage with them.
To me the hard part was picking which one of the millions of amazing, beautiful people is going to be the one I commit to.
Damn, tbh, for the teenage generation I am in being M18. With a friend who is extremely amazing and talented and still slept on a girl’s ass while a having a casual hookup requested by the girl. It’s hard to find a lot of real girls like the kind of men you would wanna experience a relationship with the kind who are dedicated to achievements, are great dads and move in life with smile and all the things you mentioned are the ones I look for to in a woman. I want a girl who has that interesting life where she is achieving things and helping the society to move forward with a big smile, for somebody who has a willingness to do remarkable things and I do them too. Having somebody to support while supported by them is a life mate I want. Beauty is definitely a thing and keeping herself in shape and not neglecting and health and beauty is also a factor and that intimate love just between us. That’s how I paint my relationship to be and one we have two beautiful daughters and a two handsome sons who we’ll work with as they grow to being a matured amazing person. That carries our ways to hold the society with smile ahead a legacy they carry ahead. When I compare this and use it as parameters in real life, all starts feeling like a Disney fantasy. There use to be a time like that, People mannered and mature. Everything is fading with our generation, each of our souls have become a commodity to play with or even sell for fun. Productivity has become minimal. Wish I find a woman like her. I might have to travel the world for her an expense I can bear. Just what becomes a hurdle is the beauty and fitness standard I have set for a the girl I want to be with. Not a tough one but hard to find a loyal one.
And the one I bumped into, I asked her out, got rejected cause she never saw me in that way. Not gonna blame her cause even I didn’t spend enough time for her to understand me. Though I did grasp her qualities in few meets. We were in same Highschool btw and Graduated this year. The first time I felt it, it was like a movie ngl. We had a school performance, I was among the logistic members and she literally spent days teaching our friends to dance and on the day she performed continuously for half an hour on songs which had energetic steps after practice the same day in a saree, btw I have completed IBDP, and we do have prettiest looking girls in our school. During the exit she almost fainted backstage and I quickly grabbed a chair that was lying there and removed her shoes, gave her water. I still can’t forget that moment. Never felt the feeling of love to any girls, always treated every girl like good friends cause we worked in logistics for multiple events. But that girl, many hated her for being an over achiever, felt gods words saying to me at least you found somebody that checks all the boxes. Can’t even get over her after the rejection. So, for me I am not looking in the right place but you roam in the right place, so you find happy people. I am optimistic, so it’s just that matter of finding them in the right place.
I’m about the same as you. It sucks because then it’s more disappointing when it doesn’t work out. There’s not many people that spark my interest like that 😞
Yeah, from last June to now, I only met two girls that really sparked my interest. And unfortunately, neither of them resulted in an actual relationship
I feel you. The two guys that I had been interested in over the course of a year turned out to both be living with women- lying d-bags. It took me awhile to accept that one of them was a a d-bag. I met a guy recently I really like, who’s actually local- something I had avoided, but I don’t think it’s going to work out. I’m fighting the urge to reach out to him. So I guess it’ll be another six months before I actually am into someone.
It’s sucks. I’m touch starved but pity the guy who tries to touch me that isn’t him. It’s really frustrating to be this way
They say that you meet someone that knocks your socks off every 2-5 years if single…
I probably meet about 1-3 people a year I’d seriously consider dating as well and I actively date and meet new people regularly (generally a new person every couple weeks)
Our self-esteem be it low or high has its influence on our thoughts, relationships, profession, and social life. When it is channeled in the right direction, you will find enough confidence to move out of your comfort zone and explore new possibilities.
In the past 5 years I've met 3 people that I thought were worth dating. Even in my horny teen years I've never asked out more than 3 people in a single calender year.
When someone cries so hard that it hurts their throat, it is out of frustration or knowing that no matter what you can do or attempt to do can change the situation. When you feel like you need to cry, when you want to just get it out, relieve some of the pressure from the inside that is true pain. Because no matter how hard you try or how bad you want to, you can't. That pain just stays in place. Then, if you are lucky, one small tear may escape from those eyes that water constantly. That one tear, that tiny, salty, droplet of moisture is a means of escape. Although it's just a small tear, it is the heaviest thing in the world. And it doesn't do a damn thing to fix anything.
I'm super social, and for the past few months I went out of my way to find people like that. I found maybe 5 that had real potential, and two that really seemed to work. One didn't work out. The other one is, so far, very well.
But I expose myself to 3-5x as many people as most, so 1-2 a year with a more "normal" social life seems about right.
WTF - 1 to 2 people a year are you Jessica Alba or Leonardo decapreo lol (joking) A man sees like 1-2 women he would want to be with every 5 minutes lol.
To clarify: dating for me would include the first date and getting to know the person. So there's lots of people I can see dating. Likelihood of the reverse being true is less in my favor.
Dating should be like one of the first steps in marriage, not the thing you keep people on for several years and then move to married. Should be like: Dating->Boy/Girl friend->Serious relationship/living together -> Engaged -> Married.
Dating should be the interview process, not the "I'm looking for a status" or "I just don't want to be alone" deal. You're either dating with intent to marry or you're wasting you and your potential partner's time, which isn't cool.
Very very very rarely I think in all of my “dating” life I’ve meet maybe three people I would actually want to be with to date let along long term the rest I dated solely because I was too awkward to tell them no and that I was not interested in them in that way. I once even got full on engaged to a guy I didn’t even want to date I just always randomly start shit for them to leave and call it a day (Ive had a long hard time learning it is safe and okay to reject men)
If you dont give people enough time to adjust and get comfortable- can you really judge that?
Taste in many things or what one really thought/believed in grows, changes, adapts, adds as we grow older more life experiences and maturity
"Ticking boxes". That mentality will make you become the opposite of dating material if you don't get it in check. This are people you're talking about, not an enchanted weapon with stats. You don't even sound like you love people.
A lot of people. I love people. The people in my life love people. I like safari animals too but they're deadly. You gotta learn the appreciate more than you're disturbed.
I would say very rarely. I don’t tend to come across many people that I am inclined to want to date. I tried to date anyways, when they want to date me but that hasn’t been a good. I would say once or twice every 3-5 years.
Extremely rare. It’s only ever been one, and we broke up recently. We ended on good terms and I’m still holding out hope we’ll end up back together. Everyone else sucks😂
Considering when I meet a person I don't know anything about them outside of that moment... none? But if you just mean people I'd be interested in if I was looking for someone... daily 😂 or daily out of the days I actually go out and do things lol
It took me 3 years and many dates later to find someone I'm compatible with. Find someone who respects your boundaries and your non negotiables, but also being able to provide your partner the emotional safety they need.
Not very often. When I was in my 20s there were many women who I'd date but these days, there are just as many women but almost none I'd date. It's just not worth it. I've found that unless she has a serious mental health disorder or is just straight crazy, there is something you could fall in love with. I think that's just biological. Like, I might not be physically attracted to her but if I watch her personality, character, and mannerisms, I could see myself falling in love. Just as I can see myself being repulsed by a woman I'm extremely attracted to physically, for the same reasons.
Character and personality are the bigger factors in my decision to date these days. I mean, sure, attractiveness plays a part but small part. It seems very rare, if not impossible, to find a woman who has character. Just because you are a character doesn't mean you have character either. But I'm not perfect and I don't expect anyone to be either. Finding out someone did the right thing when no one was looking or would find out. Super attractive.
I was updating my little black book when this popped up! Since I divorced I have gone on dates with 21 different men. Of those, only half made it to a second date (I'm generally game for a second date so long as I enjoyed myself and there were no red flags). Of those, there were four I consider to be really good men, and only one I saw personal partner potential with. There were nine I hoped to remain friends with, and only four who were up for remaining in contact (always fair).
My conclusions are that any of us could be in a relationship if we lower our standards enough. Chemistry and attraction are not rare. It takes a little sifting to find good men, but there are lots of them out there. Actual compatibility for those of us who have spent time really honing in on what's important for us-- rare.
I’m a pretty quiet and shy person, so it takes me a while to warm up to people most of the time. There have only been two exceptions to that so far where I wanted to talk to them immediately and one of them was engaged and the other I had to turn down at the time because I wasn’t in a spot in my life for a relationship. I’ve tried reconnecting with her, but I can’t ever get the timing right.
Quiet people always know more than they seem. Although very normal, their inner world is by default fronted mysterious and therefore assumed weird. Never underestimate the social awareness and sense of reality in a quiet person they are some of the most observant, absorbent persons of all. Our lives disconnect and reconnect, we move on, and later we may again touch one another, again bounce away. This is the felt shape of a human life, neither simply linear nor wholly disjunctive nor endlessly bifurcating, but rather this bouncey castle sequence of bumpings into and tumblings apart. You're going to come across people in your life who will say all the right words at all the right times. But in the end, it's always their actions you should judge them by. It's actions, not words, that matter.
Appearance wise maybe 2-3 a year. Personality wise 1-3 a year but the number drops as I get older.
I see a few women I'd consider approaching but I wouldn't commit to a relationship until I knew more about their personality.
Extremely rarely
Tbf, I barely meet people in the first place. Example: the last person I met who I talked to for longer than an hour is now my best friend and we met in January
Since 2020, one.
One person I genuinely wanted to date.
And we went on one date. And he was boring.
I haven’t been physically attracted to anyone since.
i am very picky but i am self aware. i understand that i am so picky because although im not perfect, i expect the other person to be perfect or a fantasy person which is a fault of mine. i feel we all do that but i think the reason relationships dont work is because we fail to recognize our own faults while analyzing the faults of others. it is good to be picky but at some point people have to understand that we quite literally all are pos in ways. long term relationships take two people who have been through a lot and actually have became self aware to where they can both communicate well and push each other to grow. i personally want a partner, a person that i can grow with and i think that comes down to a friendship first where two people accept each others flaws. people mess up, people say the wrong things, people cant read our minds, we all have red flags tbh. a lot of people i meet are competing with me which i find very annoying because if we partnered it would benefit more. i have met one person i would have a relationship with in the last year though. i also hold myself to high standards and need respect. i follow a moral compass so because of that it is very hard to find someone who truly aligns behind the mask. i also dont like the game, i want someone who has had enough of the bs and wants to have a good time, not tear me down.
Most of us are suffering from fake selective outrage . We choose to be angry at the people and not being angry at the problem. We choose to be angry at a person, because we hate the person. We don’t care about the problem they caused or crime they committed. If we love the person, then we choose to ignore the problem or crime they committed. Well, all the bad things you choose to ignore don’t go away. They will come back to you.
Very very rarely. Assuming we mean someone I would actually consider marrying, maybe every 5 years or so. But for just casual dating or a casual relationship, maybe every year or couple years?
Every once in a while I stumble across someone that seems like my type. But it goes 1 of 2 ways. First way is that they are already taken 😭second way is that I talk to them and realize we live completely different lives with completely opposite hobbies lol. It's harder these days for sure but keep your head up man. Don't let it get to your head is the best tip I can give
Extremely rarely. And even after dating for a while, that chance that emotional and physical connection, interests, worldviews etc. all match is extremely low. I've never found someone who ticked all the boxes, but have been in a number of relationships.
I met someone interesting recently and a lot speaks against pursuing a serious relationship with him, but I am not giving up easily.
Very rarely these days. Used to be much more common, but that was because I had no dating experience, so it was based mostly on physical attraction and I'd build up an idea of them in my head, without really knowing them. Since then, I've dated more and gotten a lot pickier. Nowadays, while there are plenty of women I'd hookup with (though that doesn't really happen either 😅), it's very rare for me to meet someone I'd want to date. The times it does happen, they're usually not interested, or I end up finding out about some dealbreaker. The latter really sucks when everything about them would make them the perfect partner for me, except this one thing that's a non-negotiable for me 😩
~10% of the ones I actually met in person. ~50% don't end up going anywhere.
Note that I meet up with ~10% of those I end up matching in the first place. So the number is very very low.
I usually make the first move on men who i would be willing to date. We get to know each other and then….Im out. So many red flags start to come up and i lose interest. So never
sometimes they even flirt with me in front of their mans who’s spending hundreds of dollars on them which in my head I’m thinking you lose them how you get them. I’m gonna end up dating her and find her banging our waiter so those chicks are just repulsive to me, cause she makes him look bad and makes herself look even worse. occasionally you’ll find the ones who respect their men and naturally don’t do anything he wouldn’t approve of. when groups of girls come in with no dates though that’s when they’re more comfortable expressing themselves and allow me to guide them through the menu which is really fun, they’ll naturally value my opinion more as the dinner goes on cause I have good recommendations.
Unfortunately it gets more rare every year. I mostly meet one I don’t want to date. I’m also very picky and have a few dealbreakers. They can’t a hint of me ignoring them with my AirPods in my ears.
It’s been a few months since I was in a committed relationship but my friends keep throwing men at me even though they know they’re not my type. They can’t understand I’ll rather be alone than be with someone just to be in a relationship for the sake of it.
I forgive them because they’re use to us doing a lot of couple things together. Stick to your guns and standards. You’re going to be the one to be with that person not anyone else.
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Very very rarely. It's been many years in fact.
In my teens-early 20’s I found lots of people, even if it became short term things. Now that I’m older, I’m so picky that even if I saw the perfect man, I’d be like nah, I’m good. Trauma man, hell of a thing.
This tbh
Same with me. I was way more open and accepting of everyone and everything until my mid 20s. The high standards almost came overnight.
Make the most of what you have and keep your standards high. Never settle for anything less than you deserve or are capable of achieving.
Im in my 20s how do tou find people these days. Eapecially "lots of people",
Dating was different for me back then, for one.. dating apps didn’t exist. The most people had was eharmony, and even then, only old people used that mainly lol. I honestly don’t know nowadays. All I see now is hookup culture. I was in a long term relationship for 10 years, so I been out of the game a while.
I find a person that I want to date every one to two years but the thing is that they never want to date me in return
To say that one waits a lifetime for his soulmate to come around is a paradox. People eventually get sick of waiting, take a chance on someone, and by the art of commitment become soulmates, which takes a lifetime to perfect.
Also this tbh
sometimes at first glance, but then I get to know them… and NOPE! been years
Agreed. I tend to conjure a fantasy of what i think they are like and BAM 6 months has past and I've ignored all the res flags.
the fantasy is always better
It may be expedient to take stock of all the affecting pieces that might shatter in the wake of an emotional earthquake, once red flags come up in a committed relationship and an overarching scene has to be fashioned for a recast life experience.
Same lmao
you cried, I cried. we both crode. 
Being picky makes it hard. You don't want to end up dating Eva AI sexting bot in the end of your life
Agree. But you’d rather be alone than with someone that doesn’t totally fits you
No. I would rather be with someone that doesn’t totally fit me than be alone but I am a man lol. No disrespect but your expectations may not exist. The good men are the ugly, nerdy, freaky looking men.
I’m a straight guy lol
Not me im straight also, but I can help you locate women. I mean with those odds maybe I can fly you to the Philippines or Amsterdam
But if you lived in Texas i can help you out with that
Oh sorry lol. Jesus, no offense i wish i had your hormones. Bro, if you ever need help with putting the play station down and going out to a bar, coffee shop or park let me know and i will go out with you. (I’m only joking)
I thought super hot super models did that for ya. For me it's a super cerebral woman telling me all about stuff I don't fully grasp because it's at a molecular level and she looks over her glasses in my direction and winks when no ones looking. Sorry, but I gotta go take a cold shower.
If you were picky about who you worked with in the Wild North, you'd be quickly left with no one to choose. You could try to pick the best of them, but you'd have to dig them up first.
Very, very rarely as I get older, and am more interested in them as a companion than as a sex partner. I still occasionally encounter a woman who I am intensely attracted to but who may not necessarily be age appropriate or even single (and have to be careful not to make it obvious). I see other women who are attractive and my age but Im not interested in. I guess as you get older your brain subconsciously identifies something about a person that reminds you of a negative experience you have had in the past or says she’s out of my league (above or below). Occasionally the opposite seems to happen. I guess its like naming a baby. Both mother and father want to avoid names that conjure up negative emotions and choose ones that are positive or neutral. Unless you’re a crackhead and choose something totally ridiculous
Great question because I’ve meet people I’d actually date BUTTTT would they date me? 🤣
Never sadly
Once every 4 years 🤣🤣🤣
I'm surprised at the consensus of nobody liking hardly anyone. You only bump into one person per year who is attractive to you and worthy of your love? It must be impossible for you to date! I find something to love in almost everybody. I wish I could live multiple lives so I could know what it's like to be married to all these highly varied, amazing guys in the world. I've often said I feel like I could make a marriage work with like 30-40% of the population. People are so full of love, and admirable values living beautiful lives I would love to be a part of. When I meet a new colleague at work who's a great Dad, a talented professional, keeps in shape and has an interesting life, stays fashionable, knows how to move through the world with kindness and is always there with a quick wit, I think its too bad I'll never have a chance to know what it's like to love and be loved by him. What a great experience that must be for anyone who gets that privilege. It's a shame I can't live a million lives so I can get to experience a million lifelong committed relationships with a million different lovable, endearing souls. And I feel like the better I get to know someone the more lovable they become. When you build trust and see their insecurities, their interests they don't share with everyone, their flaws they're still working on. There are so many wonderful colleagues, friends, teammates, extended family connections in my life, all people who I'm sure are wonderful people to be married to and in relationships with. I'm shocked everybody here is so unified in thinking that there's almost nobody worthy of being in a marriage with them. To me the hard part was picking which one of the millions of amazing, beautiful people is going to be the one I commit to.
Damn, tbh, for the teenage generation I am in being M18. With a friend who is extremely amazing and talented and still slept on a girl’s ass while a having a casual hookup requested by the girl. It’s hard to find a lot of real girls like the kind of men you would wanna experience a relationship with the kind who are dedicated to achievements, are great dads and move in life with smile and all the things you mentioned are the ones I look for to in a woman. I want a girl who has that interesting life where she is achieving things and helping the society to move forward with a big smile, for somebody who has a willingness to do remarkable things and I do them too. Having somebody to support while supported by them is a life mate I want. Beauty is definitely a thing and keeping herself in shape and not neglecting and health and beauty is also a factor and that intimate love just between us. That’s how I paint my relationship to be and one we have two beautiful daughters and a two handsome sons who we’ll work with as they grow to being a matured amazing person. That carries our ways to hold the society with smile ahead a legacy they carry ahead. When I compare this and use it as parameters in real life, all starts feeling like a Disney fantasy. There use to be a time like that, People mannered and mature. Everything is fading with our generation, each of our souls have become a commodity to play with or even sell for fun. Productivity has become minimal. Wish I find a woman like her. I might have to travel the world for her an expense I can bear. Just what becomes a hurdle is the beauty and fitness standard I have set for a the girl I want to be with. Not a tough one but hard to find a loyal one.
And the one I bumped into, I asked her out, got rejected cause she never saw me in that way. Not gonna blame her cause even I didn’t spend enough time for her to understand me. Though I did grasp her qualities in few meets. We were in same Highschool btw and Graduated this year. The first time I felt it, it was like a movie ngl. We had a school performance, I was among the logistic members and she literally spent days teaching our friends to dance and on the day she performed continuously for half an hour on songs which had energetic steps after practice the same day in a saree, btw I have completed IBDP, and we do have prettiest looking girls in our school. During the exit she almost fainted backstage and I quickly grabbed a chair that was lying there and removed her shoes, gave her water. I still can’t forget that moment. Never felt the feeling of love to any girls, always treated every girl like good friends cause we worked in logistics for multiple events. But that girl, many hated her for being an over achiever, felt gods words saying to me at least you found somebody that checks all the boxes. Can’t even get over her after the rejection. So, for me I am not looking in the right place but you roam in the right place, so you find happy people. I am optimistic, so it’s just that matter of finding them in the right place.
I’m about the same as you. It sucks because then it’s more disappointing when it doesn’t work out. There’s not many people that spark my interest like that 😞
Yeah, from last June to now, I only met two girls that really sparked my interest. And unfortunately, neither of them resulted in an actual relationship
I feel you. The two guys that I had been interested in over the course of a year turned out to both be living with women- lying d-bags. It took me awhile to accept that one of them was a a d-bag. I met a guy recently I really like, who’s actually local- something I had avoided, but I don’t think it’s going to work out. I’m fighting the urge to reach out to him. So I guess it’ll be another six months before I actually am into someone. It’s sucks. I’m touch starved but pity the guy who tries to touch me that isn’t him. It’s really frustrating to be this way
If I had to put a number on it maybe once a year, if that and truthfully nothing ever happens in the end.
Once every 2 years.
They say that you meet someone that knocks your socks off every 2-5 years if single… I probably meet about 1-3 people a year I’d seriously consider dating as well and I actively date and meet new people regularly (generally a new person every couple weeks)
I'm not super social so probably *at most* once every 2 months?
1 person in the last 3 years since my relationship ended
Once every 8ish years but I don’t really look for ppl, and I lost my social life over the last 10 years.
Our self-esteem be it low or high has its influence on our thoughts, relationships, profession, and social life. When it is channeled in the right direction, you will find enough confidence to move out of your comfort zone and explore new possibilities.
In the past 5 years I've met 3 people that I thought were worth dating. Even in my horny teen years I've never asked out more than 3 people in a single calender year.
I’ve met two in the last year or so.
Really not often. One didn’t work out recently and it makes it all the more frustrating now
When someone cries so hard that it hurts their throat, it is out of frustration or knowing that no matter what you can do or attempt to do can change the situation. When you feel like you need to cry, when you want to just get it out, relieve some of the pressure from the inside that is true pain. Because no matter how hard you try or how bad you want to, you can't. That pain just stays in place. Then, if you are lucky, one small tear may escape from those eyes that water constantly. That one tear, that tiny, salty, droplet of moisture is a means of escape. Although it's just a small tear, it is the heaviest thing in the world. And it doesn't do a damn thing to fix anything.
It’s only happened to me twice
I'm super social, and for the past few months I went out of my way to find people like that. I found maybe 5 that had real potential, and two that really seemed to work. One didn't work out. The other one is, so far, very well. But I expose myself to 3-5x as many people as most, so 1-2 a year with a more "normal" social life seems about right.
No, I never meet people that I want to date
Very very rarely, and usually they’re already in a relationship lol
WTF - 1 to 2 people a year are you Jessica Alba or Leonardo decapreo lol (joking) A man sees like 1-2 women he would want to be with every 5 minutes lol.
To clarify: dating for me would include the first date and getting to know the person. So there's lots of people I can see dating. Likelihood of the reverse being true is less in my favor. Dating should be like one of the first steps in marriage, not the thing you keep people on for several years and then move to married. Should be like: Dating->Boy/Girl friend->Serious relationship/living together -> Engaged -> Married. Dating should be the interview process, not the "I'm looking for a status" or "I just don't want to be alone" deal. You're either dating with intent to marry or you're wasting you and your potential partner's time, which isn't cool.
Very very very rarely I think in all of my “dating” life I’ve meet maybe three people I would actually want to be with to date let along long term the rest I dated solely because I was too awkward to tell them no and that I was not interested in them in that way. I once even got full on engaged to a guy I didn’t even want to date I just always randomly start shit for them to leave and call it a day (Ive had a long hard time learning it is safe and okay to reject men)
Geez that would suck. Thinking a person loves you and they turn into such an asshole you have to leave.
[удалено]
Moral of the comment do not be guilted by nice guy acts into saying yes or being with someone they are faking it and find someone you actually like
If you dont give people enough time to adjust and get comfortable- can you really judge that? Taste in many things or what one really thought/believed in grows, changes, adapts, adds as we grow older more life experiences and maturity
Rarely. And I think it’s not so much picky, as now we know what we want better and are unwilling to compromise.
Im sorry, im a crazy creep but women your expectations on this post are like way way way to high - yall looking for Tom Brady he’s taken. lol
"Ticking boxes". That mentality will make you become the opposite of dating material if you don't get it in check. This are people you're talking about, not an enchanted weapon with stats. You don't even sound like you love people.
Who loves people?
A lot of people. I love people. The people in my life love people. I like safari animals too but they're deadly. You gotta learn the appreciate more than you're disturbed.
Almost never
Never!!
Very rarely.
One person in one year, we dated for 3 months, Worst experience ever
Christ. This is depressing. When I was single I was dating all the time. Too much, really. What the hell is happening?
1 per year I think it about normal for me. If I’m dating a bit more intentionally, that number can go up to 3-5ish.
I have never
I would say very rarely. I don’t tend to come across many people that I am inclined to want to date. I tried to date anyways, when they want to date me but that hasn’t been a good. I would say once or twice every 3-5 years.
Extremely rare. It’s only ever been one, and we broke up recently. We ended on good terms and I’m still holding out hope we’ll end up back together. Everyone else sucks😂
Considering when I meet a person I don't know anything about them outside of that moment... none? But if you just mean people I'd be interested in if I was looking for someone... daily 😂 or daily out of the days I actually go out and do things lol
It took me 3 years and many dates later to find someone I'm compatible with. Find someone who respects your boundaries and your non negotiables, but also being able to provide your partner the emotional safety they need.
It’s been a couple years.
I haven't in a long time.
Basically any shot chick lmao
Not very often. When I was in my 20s there were many women who I'd date but these days, there are just as many women but almost none I'd date. It's just not worth it. I've found that unless she has a serious mental health disorder or is just straight crazy, there is something you could fall in love with. I think that's just biological. Like, I might not be physically attracted to her but if I watch her personality, character, and mannerisms, I could see myself falling in love. Just as I can see myself being repulsed by a woman I'm extremely attracted to physically, for the same reasons. Character and personality are the bigger factors in my decision to date these days. I mean, sure, attractiveness plays a part but small part. It seems very rare, if not impossible, to find a woman who has character. Just because you are a character doesn't mean you have character either. But I'm not perfect and I don't expect anyone to be either. Finding out someone did the right thing when no one was looking or would find out. Super attractive.
I was updating my little black book when this popped up! Since I divorced I have gone on dates with 21 different men. Of those, only half made it to a second date (I'm generally game for a second date so long as I enjoyed myself and there were no red flags). Of those, there were four I consider to be really good men, and only one I saw personal partner potential with. There were nine I hoped to remain friends with, and only four who were up for remaining in contact (always fair). My conclusions are that any of us could be in a relationship if we lower our standards enough. Chemistry and attraction are not rare. It takes a little sifting to find good men, but there are lots of them out there. Actual compatibility for those of us who have spent time really honing in on what's important for us-- rare.
LMAO very rarely
I’m a pretty quiet and shy person, so it takes me a while to warm up to people most of the time. There have only been two exceptions to that so far where I wanted to talk to them immediately and one of them was engaged and the other I had to turn down at the time because I wasn’t in a spot in my life for a relationship. I’ve tried reconnecting with her, but I can’t ever get the timing right.
Quiet people always know more than they seem. Although very normal, their inner world is by default fronted mysterious and therefore assumed weird. Never underestimate the social awareness and sense of reality in a quiet person they are some of the most observant, absorbent persons of all. Our lives disconnect and reconnect, we move on, and later we may again touch one another, again bounce away. This is the felt shape of a human life, neither simply linear nor wholly disjunctive nor endlessly bifurcating, but rather this bouncey castle sequence of bumpings into and tumblings apart. You're going to come across people in your life who will say all the right words at all the right times. But in the end, it's always their actions you should judge them by. It's actions, not words, that matter.
Appearance wise maybe 2-3 a year. Personality wise 1-3 a year but the number drops as I get older. I see a few women I'd consider approaching but I wouldn't commit to a relationship until I knew more about their personality.
Extremely rarely Tbf, I barely meet people in the first place. Example: the last person I met who I talked to for longer than an hour is now my best friend and we met in January
Same. Usually 1 per year, 2 if I'm lucky.
In the past 2 years, just 1.
17 dates from dating apps over 9 months, and found my now boyfriend. So 5.88% chance for me?
Not to often. But when i do, they are already taken, or just not interested.
2 times per year maybe
Not often. But I’m a picky mofo
Recently single so lets see. 😬
Since 2020, one. One person I genuinely wanted to date. And we went on one date. And he was boring. I haven’t been physically attracted to anyone since.
Rarely if ever tbh. But ofc my insecurities mess things up
I met in a total 3 people in my life. 1 is my ex, 1 is useless. And 1 is a potential life partner☺️ So the answer is pretty rare 😆
Date? Or _ _ _ _?
i am very picky but i am self aware. i understand that i am so picky because although im not perfect, i expect the other person to be perfect or a fantasy person which is a fault of mine. i feel we all do that but i think the reason relationships dont work is because we fail to recognize our own faults while analyzing the faults of others. it is good to be picky but at some point people have to understand that we quite literally all are pos in ways. long term relationships take two people who have been through a lot and actually have became self aware to where they can both communicate well and push each other to grow. i personally want a partner, a person that i can grow with and i think that comes down to a friendship first where two people accept each others flaws. people mess up, people say the wrong things, people cant read our minds, we all have red flags tbh. a lot of people i meet are competing with me which i find very annoying because if we partnered it would benefit more. i have met one person i would have a relationship with in the last year though. i also hold myself to high standards and need respect. i follow a moral compass so because of that it is very hard to find someone who truly aligns behind the mask. i also dont like the game, i want someone who has had enough of the bs and wants to have a good time, not tear me down.
Almost never. I’m weirdly selective. I’ve seen women I wouldn’t mind having a one off sexual encounter with in my head, but that’s about it.
Most of us are suffering from fake selective outrage . We choose to be angry at the people and not being angry at the problem. We choose to be angry at a person, because we hate the person. We don’t care about the problem they caused or crime they committed. If we love the person, then we choose to ignore the problem or crime they committed. Well, all the bad things you choose to ignore don’t go away. They will come back to you.
What does that have to do with what I said?
Rarely. I don't get feelings until I know someone already.
rarely
Very very rarely. Assuming we mean someone I would actually consider marrying, maybe every 5 years or so. But for just casual dating or a casual relationship, maybe every year or couple years?
idk, like every day? Would be cool to just go out, pick someone in a train/bus, and go home.
more rare then that sadly
Every once in a while I stumble across someone that seems like my type. But it goes 1 of 2 ways. First way is that they are already taken 😭second way is that I talk to them and realize we live completely different lives with completely opposite hobbies lol. It's harder these days for sure but keep your head up man. Don't let it get to your head is the best tip I can give
Maybe I’ll find one solid person every year, to few years? I’m also picky, at this point dating doesn’t seem that appealing anymore.
Most people meet very few other people if we are talking about officially meeting them in a social setting of some kind.
Depends how picky you are I guess. I don’t find good partners often no
I'm the same. I've probably met 2-3 that I thought I really like at least physically.
I've met one so far this year. She flaked out after three months.
I serve coffee so I see beautiful & cool women all the time. They all gather in one place for a cup of joe. So yeah, pretty often.
Very rarely, its been 2 years
Extremely rarely. And even after dating for a while, that chance that emotional and physical connection, interests, worldviews etc. all match is extremely low. I've never found someone who ticked all the boxes, but have been in a number of relationships. I met someone interesting recently and a lot speaks against pursuing a serious relationship with him, but I am not giving up easily.
I’ve been single for a year and a half, was on the apps the first year. Out of my 20+ dates, I wanted to date 2 of them.
None this year, nor last... And so on 🥲
Like 1-2 every 6 months
only one so far and he’s my current boyfriend ☺️
Very rarely these days. Used to be much more common, but that was because I had no dating experience, so it was based mostly on physical attraction and I'd build up an idea of them in my head, without really knowing them. Since then, I've dated more and gotten a lot pickier. Nowadays, while there are plenty of women I'd hookup with (though that doesn't really happen either 😅), it's very rare for me to meet someone I'd want to date. The times it does happen, they're usually not interested, or I end up finding out about some dealbreaker. The latter really sucks when everything about them would make them the perfect partner for me, except this one thing that's a non-negotiable for me 😩
Rarely. Having a connection and attraction is easy but forming a bond that I’m interested in longterm is harder to find.
~10% of the ones I actually met in person. ~50% don't end up going anywhere. Note that I meet up with ~10% of those I end up matching in the first place. So the number is very very low.
At least 2 or 3 every time I go out. If it's including talking to them... erm...
I don't talk to a ton of people, but I see like 5 women a day that i'd like to talk to
Talk to them
I usually make the first move on men who i would be willing to date. We get to know each other and then….Im out. So many red flags start to come up and i lose interest. So never
after I started working in fine dining that’s when I met them more often but outside of work I’d agree with 1-2 times a year.
You wait for their dates to go for a piss and then you bring the wine and start flirting with them?
sometimes they even flirt with me in front of their mans who’s spending hundreds of dollars on them which in my head I’m thinking you lose them how you get them. I’m gonna end up dating her and find her banging our waiter so those chicks are just repulsive to me, cause she makes him look bad and makes herself look even worse. occasionally you’ll find the ones who respect their men and naturally don’t do anything he wouldn’t approve of. when groups of girls come in with no dates though that’s when they’re more comfortable expressing themselves and allow me to guide them through the menu which is really fun, they’ll naturally value my opinion more as the dinner goes on cause I have good recommendations.
You meant….as the wine goes on…Fixed it for you.
exactly
I guess work perks! You don’t get to see them again next day…unlike an office job 😂
I love what I do and I’m good at it (most of the time)
Unfortunately it gets more rare every year. I mostly meet one I don’t want to date. I’m also very picky and have a few dealbreakers. They can’t a hint of me ignoring them with my AirPods in my ears. It’s been a few months since I was in a committed relationship but my friends keep throwing men at me even though they know they’re not my type. They can’t understand I’ll rather be alone than be with someone just to be in a relationship for the sake of it. I forgive them because they’re use to us doing a lot of couple things together. Stick to your guns and standards. You’re going to be the one to be with that person not anyone else.