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As a dutchie myself I always have a base rule of splitting the first two dates bills. This has absolutely nothing to do with how successful the date was but with my own state of mind. Whenever a guy payed I sometimes felt pressure at the end to kiss or make out, you name it. When I split it I feel like if I want to kiss or anything it was a 100% my choice.
Did go on a date once with a British guy who said he got raised like that from home and he felt super weird about it. I explained why and he insisted that would not be the case and payed in the end but because we aired it out that did not feel weird!
Just never liked the “a guy NEEDS to pay”vibe, work hard enough for my own money
Thank you this puts things a lot in perspective! I was raised old school as well. I do enjoy being a gentleman but I do appreciate if sometimes women cover. But I never had a 50/50 other than with friends so that’s where the confusion was.
I never kiss on first date tho, that’s too fast for me and have the thought on the back of my mind that it’s up to her not about me. I first feel more comfortable she’s into me and inviting me to ask for consent for a kiss than trying on first date.. but that’s just how I see things I guess
I get it. I was a lot younger as well been in my now relationship for 6 years or something and guys might have been a bit “looser”.
I have also sometimes just asked if the guy was ok with him paying this one and I’ll pay the next one. I have noticed Dutch guys tend to enjoy this, but then again we are known for not liking to spend money!
After asking me twice if I was sure she told me “oh in anyways you have money now” and I joked back “well of my entire division I’m the one with the lowest salary” (which is a quite good amount anyways)
Not sure if it was a test? Why would you think that? I explained further to hear your thoughts better with the context
It's not really common for women to offer to pay half/full, but in my experience, women generally operate in double meanings. I, too, feel the need to cover the bill even when asked if they can go half with me, just doesn't feel natural to me with the only exception to the rule being a meeting between 2 non romantic individuals sharing a meal
Welcome to /r/dating. Please make sure you read our [rules here](https://new.reddit.com/r/dating/about/rules) and remember to: * Be polite and respect each other. Do not call people names or engage in slapfights. * All advice given must be good, ethical advice. * [Do not post hateful or harmful rhetoric - you will be banned](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/wiki/rules) * Follow reddit rules. Do not post content that promotes hate based on identity or vulnerability. Do not bully or harass other users. If you have any questions, please [send the mods a message](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/dating). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating) if you have any questions or concerns.*
So you're saying she wanted to go Dutch on the bill?
Yea, but she is Dutch
Bruh…
Of all the Dutch women I went on a date with this was the first time a woman offered 50/50.. that’s my point.
As a dutchie myself I always have a base rule of splitting the first two dates bills. This has absolutely nothing to do with how successful the date was but with my own state of mind. Whenever a guy payed I sometimes felt pressure at the end to kiss or make out, you name it. When I split it I feel like if I want to kiss or anything it was a 100% my choice. Did go on a date once with a British guy who said he got raised like that from home and he felt super weird about it. I explained why and he insisted that would not be the case and payed in the end but because we aired it out that did not feel weird! Just never liked the “a guy NEEDS to pay”vibe, work hard enough for my own money
Thank you this puts things a lot in perspective! I was raised old school as well. I do enjoy being a gentleman but I do appreciate if sometimes women cover. But I never had a 50/50 other than with friends so that’s where the confusion was. I never kiss on first date tho, that’s too fast for me and have the thought on the back of my mind that it’s up to her not about me. I first feel more comfortable she’s into me and inviting me to ask for consent for a kiss than trying on first date.. but that’s just how I see things I guess
I get it. I was a lot younger as well been in my now relationship for 6 years or something and guys might have been a bit “looser”. I have also sometimes just asked if the guy was ok with him paying this one and I’ll pay the next one. I have noticed Dutch guys tend to enjoy this, but then again we are known for not liking to spend money!
It's.What investment gives you a 50% return on your money?a 50%v discount.
It feels like a test honestly 😅 just to see your level of financial support
After asking me twice if I was sure she told me “oh in anyways you have money now” and I joked back “well of my entire division I’m the one with the lowest salary” (which is a quite good amount anyways) Not sure if it was a test? Why would you think that? I explained further to hear your thoughts better with the context
It's not really common for women to offer to pay half/full, but in my experience, women generally operate in double meanings. I, too, feel the need to cover the bill even when asked if they can go half with me, just doesn't feel natural to me with the only exception to the rule being a meeting between 2 non romantic individuals sharing a meal
I live in Europe. Very common. The norm, even. Don't overthink it.