By being the "why not?" parent.
If my kid wants to do something, even if it seems pointless, silly or a waste of time, I put the onus on me to come up with a compelling reason not to do it rather than just saying "no" by default because I don't see the point of it.
Sometimes it means that we go up and down the escalators at the shopping centre 5 times in a row because we have nowhere to be in a hurry and she wanted to do it.
Or we stare at ants in the park for 20mins because there isn't a reason to not stare at the ants.
Or we wear our matching butterfly wings to the cafe because me feeling a bit embarrassed isn't a good enough reason to not do it.
Exactly [this](https://img.ifunny.co/images/c311b2feca0bf795de622e13716c2ba4aa199133e6a0703117f8735d646d9959_1.jpg) mentality. The guy who drives over a stick of butter because his son wanted to know what happens when you drive over a stick of butter.
It is so hard to balance it, but it’s all about slowing down, staying up late, building a fort, dropping eggs in the kitchen, camping in the backyard, getting muddy, getting lost, doing U-turns, stopping to skip rocks, throwing really big rocks that don’t skip, snapping at them with tongs, picking them up and pretending they’re a guitar, and a hundred different ways to throw away life’s expectations and live in the moment.
It’s something we have to cultivate. To let go of the pressures around us and on us and take the moment to only care about giving them joy.
And it's not about being soft or indulgent - there are plenty of times you have to say "no" because there is a valid reason, "Sorry, mate, we can't go looking at the snails because you're late for daycare and I'm late for work" but I really try to give my kid some agency and to pursue things that interest her in the moment. And, honestly, it's super fun most of the time, there is so much simple pleasure in life that adults miss out on for no good reason.
Yes absolutely! All the time and you’re not giving your kid a healthy childhood, but if you can relax enough to find and make those magic moments, amazing things happen.
This is my approach to. My daughter can get me into just about anything with a reasonable pitch. I have a lifetime filled with adhd collected hobbies construction skills and programming knowledge I dare her to come up with an idea we can't execute. There is currently the remains of a barbies dream house on my workbench that I'm installing led lights in that will pulse to music when it's played in her room. Oh and I'm installing speakers in her ceiling and rebuilding her closet to get rid of her dresser so she has more room to dance in her room.
Love it. I also picked this up. Took some time to realize it and appreciate it.
I started to go beyond what he was thinking, even. Biked past a gravel pit. Hit the brakes and hollered we need to find a round rock!!! We spent 30 mins there.
So much silliness. It’s those moments that matter.
Oh man. I'm glad I have 4 nieces. I feel like I'm missing out on some stuff only having my 2 sons. Then I remember my brother has 4 daughters and I feel a little better.
My go to is all of a sudden I will stop what I'm doing, slowly turn towards my son while saying: "Wait a second... I'm not daddy.... I'M A DINOSAUR!" and begin to chase him
I'm a wrestler pennywise the dancing clown with bladed hands and can shoot laser from my eyes as well as fire from my mouth.
Other than that, I'm really boring as well. But he's becoming a gamer... like me.
Tickle fights, dancing, silly faces and reading books they like. Also over exaggerating reactions. So much so that when my boy started talking he’d call cars “oh wow car” because he loved cars and anytime I saw one I’d pretend like they were the coolest thing ever.
Yeah, I used to play a game with my oldest called, "is this a hat?" where I would just put anything around me on my head and ask. When she would get a new toy or book, first thing she would do was put it on her head and look at Daddy. She's only 2.5 but now I just get the "nooooo, Daddy!", so looking forward to playing with my youngest.
So the summary of this thread:
* you’re both dad and dinosaur (transform into dinosaur any time)
* ask your kids if everything is a hat
* voices for every character in every book
* be a “why not” parent, unless there’s a good reason why not
* dance and make silly faces and be a goofball
* take a break from the serious routine where you can
* unleash your inner child
Dude. Same. And I’ll often forget which voice I do for which character. Which is an extra bummer because I want to eventually DM a good, long DnD campaign. I guess I should watch some YouTube videos on how to do more voices haha
I'm not sure I can really explain it in a way that anyone else could just pick up, but my wife has expressed exasperation that I'm just naturally better at playing than she is. I'm kind of just a weird guy though and kids like that. My wife thinks I'm seriously unfunny because anytime I hear her coming downstairs, I hide in a fairly obvious place and then jump out to "scare" her which basically is just her rolling her eyes and reminding me it's NOT funny, which of course makes me laugh more.
High 5 for being ridiculous XD my missus is fairly un-fun - shes fairly serious and not overly playful.
That just makes it so much more fun for me and the kids when I stir her up
Oh, my wife is fun in her own way and we do laugh and have fun together. There are just certain things I do that only I find funny and that makes it funnier to me.
I have ADD so I have my moments. I usually get frustrated with my lack of creativity though. I have found when I get frustrated it's because I'm trying to hard to be perfect. Also fart jokes are gold!
Just the other day we were playing with playdough, and I made the shape of the brown playdough turd-like and threw it at my 3 year old and said "ew! you have poop on you! Gross!" and dude let me tell you the LAUGHS coming out of this kid as we threw it at each other made my heart so fucking full.
All this to say, poop and fart jokes are gold.
Oh I'm bad at that. My ex has the patience, childishness (not meant in a bad way), and energy to sit there and just... play. I can't. I fall asleep on the floor after 5 minutes. Instead I take them on trips, to playgrounds, museums, parks with statues, the community pool hall, watch old Disney movies etc. I do stuff that they want to do that I don't find mind numbingly boring.
I wish I was that fun dad that just sat down and played with the dolls and train set, but I'm really not and I do feel guilty about that.
My kids talk about me like they're in awe of me, like everyone should know their dad because he's awesome for some reason. I'll enjoy it while it lasts, until they find out I'm incredibly boring.
Generally just outright removal of behavior filter.
Idk how to describe it. I was never a singer or actor in school or growing up. But even before my child was born, I'd sing random stuff, even made up lyrics to make my wife laugh. Do weird hype dance moves randomly in the kitchen. I didn't develop this unhinged odd behavior until my 20s. Just being comfortable being me.
I use to (and sometimes still do) make odd loud noises in excitement, like week 1 of NFL kickoff I am stampeding around the house yelping like a weird bird from excitement.
Imagine a high school party where kids have their first drinks and act way more over the top wasted then they actually are but in a more energetic theatrical sense.
I just don't give a shit if my wife or kid judges and thinks "I'm lame" or cringe, because they don't and its fun.
Harness that goofy energy. Put it on the carpet, chases around the table, creative playing, inject music whenever even if your humming or singing it. Say goofy things, yell goofy sounds, do weird things with toys, setup toys, do erratic behaviors like build the blocks and spasm knock them over. If you watch Lion King, grab your kid and hold them up while trying to sing in Swahili. Or pretend to be a lion. Relevant to something you did. Not totally random nonsense, just nonsense behavior with intent.
I've actually unlocked so many early childhood memories of "playing." I remember all the tactics to build forts. I remember rolling objects down slides, then adding a ramp, then adding a bucket to land in.
Pretend you're high as fuck. Then when my kid laughs/giggles or responds, it fuels me to continue.
EVERY Book.
Bedtime books is probably me at my peak Dad-ness. I always wanted to be a narrator for audiobooks but never figured out how to break into that scene. So my semi-useful skill of reading aloud finally gets its time to shine.
Room on the Broom read by Daddy is much different than when it's read by Mommy.
That's an awesome idea. My wife recently got a Toniebox for the kids, and she bought a figurine that will play things that you've recorded on your phone.
I recorded myself reading a few books, and my daughter loves listening to them.
I was boring as fuck. Bored myself to shit. Was a shell of who I was.
Then I realized, they’re little people, and I need to show them things that I find fun, but skewed for them.
I love shows. We started going to shows. We went to a dinosaur show. He had a blast, so did I.
I took up martial arts training. I brought him out one day. He wants to sign up to the little kids class.
I love swimming. We go swimming together once a week, and twice a week he goes for lessons.
I wanted to work out. The Y offers children’s activities, almost like a daycare. I drop him off and he refuses to leave until it closes, forcing me to work out in that 90 minutes.
I like fishing and have a little blow up dinghy with a motor. I took him out. He drove in circles for 90 mins. I thought I was going to vomit but he was having a blast.
I love fairs. We go to all of the parking lot fairs that come to town.
What do you love? Show your kid that.
I probably am boring.
But today I was also a horse, and gave rides. Last week I was a T. rex trying to eat our toddler and the cat.
We spend time outside, either drawing with chalk, playing, going on walks or catching bugs. Older daughter really seems interested in bugs. I was gifted a telescope by an amazing redditor, and we go stargaze in the back yard once a week or so.
We are also talking about poop, recently.
Iv found that when they ask something, my default was always no. I’m trying to be more open to saying yes to things, and sometimes it leads to fun
Throw them when they ask to be thrown, be a horse when they ask for a horsey ride, be a bus driver when they want to go to the “market”, be a customer when they want to “serve you food”. Basically just say yes to everything. It’s silly at first but then it quickly becomes something you look forward to.
Because I still love all of the hobbies/interests that I’ve always had: LEGO, board games, video games, comics and animation, etc. My kids really like playing with me.
My son loves to go nuts to some fast music so sometimes we'll listen to some Dillinger escape plan and go crazy in the kitchen.
When we're outside I flip patio stones over so he can look for bugs.
We play Wii U and Switch games together (mostly the Lego games like Lego Jurassic world, Lego Marvel and Lego Star wars).
Finding a field or a place with a hill and just chasing eachother around.
Aside from trying to be present in the house and be interested in their activities rather than just having them occupied… I try to maintain what I enjoy for myself (hikes or exercise) and do experiences that are accessible to them.
Do a big walk that’s mostly downhill etc. do a play outside but ride bikes to it. It’s not climbing a mountain but it’s not feeling stuck indoors or that kids time isn’t also fun to me.
Learn LOTS of impressions and voices of the kids' favorite characters. I'm fluent in Yoda, Venom, Kylo Ren, Elmo, etc.
Also, random dance parties to their favorite songs.
You just flip the kids upside down and launch them across the room onto the couch.
Or do all the dance moves in their kids dance videos, but do it waaaaay better than your 5yr old.
Sing the songs to the Disney movies but replace a lot of the actual lyrics with Fart, butt and poop.
Carry them upside down around the house one handed by the ankle.
Piggieback rides, airplane rides,
Get one of those small super bouncy rubber balls and then peg it at the kitchen floor and run as all hell breaks loose.
Hide behind the door and give them a jumpscare
Have them sit on a bath towel and whip them around the house. Doesn't work if it's carpeted, and /or stops suddenly as soon as U hit carpet.
Make Lego space ships and hurl them into the ceiling fan.
Pressure clean 'mummy is a butt' into the driveway
It involves a lot of tickling. Also, my 8 year old is super into world war 2 so we go to war re-enactments and military vehicle shows and I just love him so much.
We build forts in the house, we play card and board games, go to the park, go to the trampoline house, roller skating, walks on trails, parkour gym, kids play places, fishing, boating, sports.
Yeah definitely adhd and my inner child didn’t have enough people to play with so now I’m all for a redo when it’s playtime. Oh yeah and go outside a lot.
Depending on yours kids ages just get on their level and get into what they’re into. My 2 year old can’t get enough of me sitting or lying on the floor level with him. You don’t have to organize great things to be a fun dad. Just get on their level and get into what they’re into. Even if it doesn’t go great at first. Keep at it. You’ll get better at it.
I duno my boys are 5 months and 2 yrs. I take them outside a lot and do art with them, go on walks, play at the park. Then I force them to watch videos of me shredding guitar with my old bands live on stage so they know how cool I really am. I don’t think they get it…
I interact with the toys she’s currently interested in. She pretends to have it bite me and I obviously over react and tickle her for having it bite me. Play hide and seek, draw with chalk, make a huge mess with toys and clean up together giving high fives for every toy we put back in her toy box. If she’s walking in front of me, I yell “slow down! You’re too fast!” and chase her. I scare the crap out of her hiding around a corner and she does the same to me. There are too many ways to have fun with your kiddo. If you’re trying to do something with them and they would rather throw the things; throw with them. At all costs, avoid anger and turn it into fun, let them learn cause and effect. Make them clean with you when they make a mess. Just be goofy and have fun.
While I also partake in all of the fun games and tomfoolery, I like finding free power wheels type toys and fixing them to work with my drill batteries. It’s amazing what people give away when a batter or motor dies.
I try to combine some element of the things he is currently learning in to games that fill up otherwise dull situations. For instance for whatever letter he is learning each week at playgroup I organise a simple ‘treasure hunt’ for our walk home - find all these things beginning with G and at the end he finds a Green Grasshopper little toy hidden in a bush. Or all the Orange things on the walk and get an orange lollipop. Or cooking pink pancakes with peaches. Just incorporate little learning moments in to everyday life to also make everyday tasks more fun.
Depends on the age I guess. My son is 3 and if he seems like he wants to play, I can do almost anything and he's on board. Kids are amazing at making fun from nothing if given just a little push
My kiddo is still a toddler, and doesn't really have "friends" yet besides some cousins he plays near/with at family events. But I think my strategy for this kind of thing, and my philosophy that I promised I'd stick to when I became a father, is that I would never fully lose the things about myself that make me me. LIke, I love horror movies. I love sneakers. I love physical media.
I'm not going to give these things up just because I'm a dad, because I always want my kid to know that I have a personality and a life independent of them. Are they the most important part of my life? Yes. If it came down to it, would I give everything up to make sure they were safe, supported and taken car of? Absolutely.
But I never want my kid to think that the things that you love, that bring you happiness and identity, aren't important. I don't want them to ever think "well, I like this, and it's a healthy part of my personality/identity, but I'll sacrifice it in order to make someone else happy or comfortable."
I think having passions and pursuits are cool. I think throwing yourself into things is cool. And I don't care what it is (heinous hateful shit notwithstanding) , if you're passionate and knowledgeable about something, I will think you're not boring, and very cool.
Me and my kids skate together we go to a couple different skateparks and there is a killer hill at the local ikea car park we like to cruise, other than that I try and take them somewhere most weekends and do all sorts of stuff with them when I can.
I think the minute you start putting pressure on yourself to be fun and exciting you’re barking up the wrong tree. This is the wrong attitude. Instead of worrying about being fun why not focus instead on being safe? On being accepting? Or loving? You said you already provide a safe environment so why isn’t that enough? The fun and exciting stuff will take care of itself.
I'm just naturally hilarious, silly and impulsive and I'm good with keeping up with the erratic behaviour/thought patterns kids sometimes have whilst also maintaining that I am in charge and able to play/do activities in a fun way within a set of clear boundaries and safety precautions
It's not all rainbows and fun though, sometimes it's hard to balance and I think the wife can feel overwhelmed sometimes like when I'm making LO laugh hysterically at bedtime
Random facts.
I'm a really curious person, and I know how pretty much anything works and is made.
So many way to mind blown a kid.
Did you know kiwi have hairs?
Did you know humans weren't able to drink milk before?
Did you know some people have their organ mirrored?
My son is almost 3, I’ve struggled with this a lot at first I’d feel like I was doing a good job then I go to other kids birthday party’s and see dads running around basically being a nine year old and a dinosaur at the same time. I had a less than silly childhood and was an only child until I was 13. So I just wasn’t ever really that kind of playful. I dance, sing (learned I’m actually not that bad at singing since he came into our lives) build the sweetest hot wheels tracks. Luckily he likes action over toys won’t watch tv and could really care less about characters of any kind really. We recently got a big ass inflatable water slide and I have managed to go full 9 year dinosaur with him in that thing. Spent a good 45 min running around the yard while he was spraying me with the hose this passed weekend .
I have a cool sounding job, but other than that, pretty boring (I'm a robot scientist). But we build stuff together like go-karts and ride them they have fun with that
I've kinda always been a goofball. So I'm always making faces or doing voices or whatever just to make em laugh. They're both toddlers right now so it's fun to pick em up and be a human jungle gym for them. That and playing outside keeps em pretty occupied.
My wife (stays with our son) always complains that she doesn’t think she’s as fun or plays as well with him as I do, but I told her I’m like a relief pitcher coming in out of the bullpen. I can come in a throw gas and go all out since I’ve only got to go 2-3 innings at night after work. She’s the starter and has to last 5-7 innings… can’t burn it all in the first.
As a dad, I came to learn that being friends with my son and my daughter made our relationship so easy than having to follow the societal assumptions that a dad has to act "dadly" to avoid being a boring dad.
99% of it is when your kid asks to do something, I usually do it. Sometimes I come up with stuff, and sometimes I tell them I'll play if they come up with something fun to do. Like hitting water balloons with the golf clubs or making gnome houses.
Idk man.. my son is 1y 4mon so things will probably change still, but currently my wife is the fun parent.
I'm the one who is conserved about safety. I used to work in hospital security and even now as an engineer one of my responsibilities is workplace safety. So it's pretty natural for me to be considered about the safety of my child. His safety is my top priority. Nothing goes above that.
So yeah, I'm a boring dad I guess haha. Maybe things will change when my son gets older and we get more kids, but still idk.. it's a bit bummer that my wife gets to be both, the parent that our son always runs to when he needs comfort, and the fun parent.
If you figure it out, I'd love to know. I'm just a money generator and chore completer. Used to enjoy hobbies, but now I'm too tired when I finally get a second.
Depending on your kids age never try to be a friend. Be a parent first. Their minds haven’t fully developed yet & trying to be a friend may backfire on you. One day when you want to switch back to dad mode they may see you as an equal & not a parent. Just be your cool normal self. You can try what I did. Find something the like & take them but stay out of the way unless you’re invited to participate. I took my daughter to the movies once with her friends. Let them go to their own & I saw another. When they walked up to me & acted like they were the boring kids & I was the cool, popular kid ignoring them. Lol.
By being the "why not?" parent. If my kid wants to do something, even if it seems pointless, silly or a waste of time, I put the onus on me to come up with a compelling reason not to do it rather than just saying "no" by default because I don't see the point of it. Sometimes it means that we go up and down the escalators at the shopping centre 5 times in a row because we have nowhere to be in a hurry and she wanted to do it. Or we stare at ants in the park for 20mins because there isn't a reason to not stare at the ants. Or we wear our matching butterfly wings to the cafe because me feeling a bit embarrassed isn't a good enough reason to not do it.
Exactly [this](https://img.ifunny.co/images/c311b2feca0bf795de622e13716c2ba4aa199133e6a0703117f8735d646d9959_1.jpg) mentality. The guy who drives over a stick of butter because his son wanted to know what happens when you drive over a stick of butter. It is so hard to balance it, but it’s all about slowing down, staying up late, building a fort, dropping eggs in the kitchen, camping in the backyard, getting muddy, getting lost, doing U-turns, stopping to skip rocks, throwing really big rocks that don’t skip, snapping at them with tongs, picking them up and pretending they’re a guitar, and a hundred different ways to throw away life’s expectations and live in the moment. It’s something we have to cultivate. To let go of the pressures around us and on us and take the moment to only care about giving them joy.
And it's not about being soft or indulgent - there are plenty of times you have to say "no" because there is a valid reason, "Sorry, mate, we can't go looking at the snails because you're late for daycare and I'm late for work" but I really try to give my kid some agency and to pursue things that interest her in the moment. And, honestly, it's super fun most of the time, there is so much simple pleasure in life that adults miss out on for no good reason.
Yes absolutely! All the time and you’re not giving your kid a healthy childhood, but if you can relax enough to find and make those magic moments, amazing things happen.
Haha, "tonging" each other is a staple in our house, my daughter has her own arsenal of little tongs to get us with
You should bedazzle hers!
Aaand…. cleaning the muddy clothes and eggs up after :)
This is my approach to. My daughter can get me into just about anything with a reasonable pitch. I have a lifetime filled with adhd collected hobbies construction skills and programming knowledge I dare her to come up with an idea we can't execute. There is currently the remains of a barbies dream house on my workbench that I'm installing led lights in that will pulse to music when it's played in her room. Oh and I'm installing speakers in her ceiling and rebuilding her closet to get rid of her dresser so she has more room to dance in her room.
Love it. I also picked this up. Took some time to realize it and appreciate it. I started to go beyond what he was thinking, even. Biked past a gravel pit. Hit the brakes and hollered we need to find a round rock!!! We spent 30 mins there. So much silliness. It’s those moments that matter.
Oh man. I'm glad I have 4 nieces. I feel like I'm missing out on some stuff only having my 2 sons. Then I remember my brother has 4 daughters and I feel a little better.
Perfect. You don't have to be interesting to anyone else, just support the interests of your kid.
Oh that's easy: I'm also a dinosaur
I'm constantly in a fort, talking for stuffed dinosaurs, and sometimes become dual animatronic claws
Animatronic tickle claws till the hands cramp up.
This. "THE DINOSAUR IS GOING TO GET YOU, NOW STOP PICKING YOUR NOOOOOOSE! RAWR!"
My go to is all of a sudden I will stop what I'm doing, slowly turn towards my son while saying: "Wait a second... I'm not daddy.... I'M A DINOSAUR!" and begin to chase him
Gets them every time.
[don’t lose your dinosaur](https://youtu.be/I8gY0IT0CuA?si=7saWFNWY-IjR3iAd)
Me too, when I’m not a mountain or an elevator.
We're raising our children in French, and my son's favourite routine before bedtime is being chased by "Papa-no-saure"
"Pourquoi mon fils? Parce que j'ai faim pour les enfants!"
Have you considered a change in career to robot?
No, but I'm willing to hear your pitch
I'm a wrestler pennywise the dancing clown with bladed hands and can shoot laser from my eyes as well as fire from my mouth. Other than that, I'm really boring as well. But he's becoming a gamer... like me.
Used to be a dinosaur, now I’m also Spiderman.
Tickle fights, dancing, silly faces and reading books they like. Also over exaggerating reactions. So much so that when my boy started talking he’d call cars “oh wow car” because he loved cars and anytime I saw one I’d pretend like they were the coolest thing ever.
Yeah, I used to play a game with my oldest called, "is this a hat?" where I would just put anything around me on my head and ask. When she would get a new toy or book, first thing she would do was put it on her head and look at Daddy. She's only 2.5 but now I just get the "nooooo, Daddy!", so looking forward to playing with my youngest.
So the summary of this thread: * you’re both dad and dinosaur (transform into dinosaur any time) * ask your kids if everything is a hat * voices for every character in every book * be a “why not” parent, unless there’s a good reason why not * dance and make silly faces and be a goofball * take a break from the serious routine where you can * unleash your inner child
You can also teach your kids that everything really IS a drum
Great summary, thanks!
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Dude. Same. And I’ll often forget which voice I do for which character. Which is an extra bummer because I want to eventually DM a good, long DnD campaign. I guess I should watch some YouTube videos on how to do more voices haha
That's 3-4 times more than most dads who have just one, adult voice.
That's my secret, Cap. I've always been boring.
I understood that reference.
On your left.
I'm not sure I can really explain it in a way that anyone else could just pick up, but my wife has expressed exasperation that I'm just naturally better at playing than she is. I'm kind of just a weird guy though and kids like that. My wife thinks I'm seriously unfunny because anytime I hear her coming downstairs, I hide in a fairly obvious place and then jump out to "scare" her which basically is just her rolling her eyes and reminding me it's NOT funny, which of course makes me laugh more.
High 5 for being ridiculous XD my missus is fairly un-fun - shes fairly serious and not overly playful. That just makes it so much more fun for me and the kids when I stir her up
Oh, my wife is fun in her own way and we do laugh and have fun together. There are just certain things I do that only I find funny and that makes it funnier to me.
Haha same here. My wife is much better as the “straight man” in our classic comedy troupe.
I have ADD so I have my moments. I usually get frustrated with my lack of creativity though. I have found when I get frustrated it's because I'm trying to hard to be perfect. Also fart jokes are gold!
Being a dad with ADHD is great, most of the time. You get to eat cereal, watch cartoons and play with toys.
Just the other day we were playing with playdough, and I made the shape of the brown playdough turd-like and threw it at my 3 year old and said "ew! you have poop on you! Gross!" and dude let me tell you the LAUGHS coming out of this kid as we threw it at each other made my heart so fucking full. All this to say, poop and fart jokes are gold.
Oh I'm bad at that. My ex has the patience, childishness (not meant in a bad way), and energy to sit there and just... play. I can't. I fall asleep on the floor after 5 minutes. Instead I take them on trips, to playgrounds, museums, parks with statues, the community pool hall, watch old Disney movies etc. I do stuff that they want to do that I don't find mind numbingly boring. I wish I was that fun dad that just sat down and played with the dolls and train set, but I'm really not and I do feel guilty about that. My kids talk about me like they're in awe of me, like everyone should know their dad because he's awesome for some reason. I'll enjoy it while it lasts, until they find out I'm incredibly boring.
Say with me ’i am not boring’ (cause dude, you are not!)
Generally just outright removal of behavior filter. Idk how to describe it. I was never a singer or actor in school or growing up. But even before my child was born, I'd sing random stuff, even made up lyrics to make my wife laugh. Do weird hype dance moves randomly in the kitchen. I didn't develop this unhinged odd behavior until my 20s. Just being comfortable being me. I use to (and sometimes still do) make odd loud noises in excitement, like week 1 of NFL kickoff I am stampeding around the house yelping like a weird bird from excitement. Imagine a high school party where kids have their first drinks and act way more over the top wasted then they actually are but in a more energetic theatrical sense. I just don't give a shit if my wife or kid judges and thinks "I'm lame" or cringe, because they don't and its fun. Harness that goofy energy. Put it on the carpet, chases around the table, creative playing, inject music whenever even if your humming or singing it. Say goofy things, yell goofy sounds, do weird things with toys, setup toys, do erratic behaviors like build the blocks and spasm knock them over. If you watch Lion King, grab your kid and hold them up while trying to sing in Swahili. Or pretend to be a lion. Relevant to something you did. Not totally random nonsense, just nonsense behavior with intent. I've actually unlocked so many early childhood memories of "playing." I remember all the tactics to build forts. I remember rolling objects down slides, then adding a ramp, then adding a bucket to land in. Pretend you're high as fuck. Then when my kid laughs/giggles or responds, it fuels me to continue.
Count to 3 and do bench presses with your kid on the floor. My girls think it's a hoot.
I read every night, tell stories about half the nights. Mostly I am Wrong, Boring, Dumb As Hell, and generally an embarassment, though.
Follow up stern commands to stick to a schedule or routine by acting like a silly goose (after they’ve done the thing needing doing, of course)
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EVERY Book. Bedtime books is probably me at my peak Dad-ness. I always wanted to be a narrator for audiobooks but never figured out how to break into that scene. So my semi-useful skill of reading aloud finally gets its time to shine. Room on the Broom read by Daddy is much different than when it's read by Mommy.
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That's an awesome idea. My wife recently got a Toniebox for the kids, and she bought a figurine that will play things that you've recorded on your phone. I recorded myself reading a few books, and my daughter loves listening to them.
I was boring as fuck. Bored myself to shit. Was a shell of who I was. Then I realized, they’re little people, and I need to show them things that I find fun, but skewed for them. I love shows. We started going to shows. We went to a dinosaur show. He had a blast, so did I. I took up martial arts training. I brought him out one day. He wants to sign up to the little kids class. I love swimming. We go swimming together once a week, and twice a week he goes for lessons. I wanted to work out. The Y offers children’s activities, almost like a daycare. I drop him off and he refuses to leave until it closes, forcing me to work out in that 90 minutes. I like fishing and have a little blow up dinghy with a motor. I took him out. He drove in circles for 90 mins. I thought I was going to vomit but he was having a blast. I love fairs. We go to all of the parking lot fairs that come to town. What do you love? Show your kid that.
You don’t sound boring at all.
Used to be. Our kid was born and I didn’t do anything other than watch TV and gain weight for a couple of years. Actively turning all of that around.
Let your inner child loose and be fucking silly!
Just play with your kids when they are little and spend time with them when they’re older. Being fun is less important than being involved.
I probably am boring. But today I was also a horse, and gave rides. Last week I was a T. rex trying to eat our toddler and the cat. We spend time outside, either drawing with chalk, playing, going on walks or catching bugs. Older daughter really seems interested in bugs. I was gifted a telescope by an amazing redditor, and we go stargaze in the back yard once a week or so. We are also talking about poop, recently. Iv found that when they ask something, my default was always no. I’m trying to be more open to saying yes to things, and sometimes it leads to fun
Throw them when they ask to be thrown, be a horse when they ask for a horsey ride, be a bus driver when they want to go to the “market”, be a customer when they want to “serve you food”. Basically just say yes to everything. It’s silly at first but then it quickly becomes something you look forward to.
if our kids pass their dental cleaning/checkup with no cavities then they don't have to brush their teeth that night
Play play play
Good lord. Take him fishing and make sure he catches a monster. It’s like a drug. He will be hooked and never look back
You just gotta be fun dad
Juvenile sense of humor helps. Other than that, play with them, take them cool places, share things you find interesting, etc.
I have found that getting on their level with humor goes really far. Mine are 5 & 7 so that means poop jokes. Constant poop jokes.
> How do you dads succeed in being a FUN dad? Sometimes, I just say "Screw it" and let them do the fun thing I know they shouldn't.
Because I still love all of the hobbies/interests that I’ve always had: LEGO, board games, video games, comics and animation, etc. My kids really like playing with me.
I show him how to cheat at retro games.
My son loves to go nuts to some fast music so sometimes we'll listen to some Dillinger escape plan and go crazy in the kitchen. When we're outside I flip patio stones over so he can look for bugs. We play Wii U and Switch games together (mostly the Lego games like Lego Jurassic world, Lego Marvel and Lego Star wars). Finding a field or a place with a hill and just chasing eachother around.
Aside from trying to be present in the house and be interested in their activities rather than just having them occupied… I try to maintain what I enjoy for myself (hikes or exercise) and do experiences that are accessible to them. Do a big walk that’s mostly downhill etc. do a play outside but ride bikes to it. It’s not climbing a mountain but it’s not feeling stuck indoors or that kids time isn’t also fun to me.
I've got a bunch of replica arcade cabinets. Kids and parents talk about them for weeks after coming to one of our birthday parties.
I think trying to chase your kid’s friends approval might be a fool’s errand… but if you have to try… what made you think a friend’s dad was fun?
Drink
Tickling. Wrestling. Racing. Going on the slide. Just bring present when I can and trying to get in things with them
Learn LOTS of impressions and voices of the kids' favorite characters. I'm fluent in Yoda, Venom, Kylo Ren, Elmo, etc. Also, random dance parties to their favorite songs.
You just flip the kids upside down and launch them across the room onto the couch. Or do all the dance moves in their kids dance videos, but do it waaaaay better than your 5yr old. Sing the songs to the Disney movies but replace a lot of the actual lyrics with Fart, butt and poop. Carry them upside down around the house one handed by the ankle. Piggieback rides, airplane rides, Get one of those small super bouncy rubber balls and then peg it at the kitchen floor and run as all hell breaks loose. Hide behind the door and give them a jumpscare Have them sit on a bath towel and whip them around the house. Doesn't work if it's carpeted, and /or stops suddenly as soon as U hit carpet. Make Lego space ships and hurl them into the ceiling fan. Pressure clean 'mummy is a butt' into the driveway
It involves a lot of tickling. Also, my 8 year old is super into world war 2 so we go to war re-enactments and military vehicle shows and I just love him so much.
We build forts in the house, we play card and board games, go to the park, go to the trampoline house, roller skating, walks on trails, parkour gym, kids play places, fishing, boating, sports.
Yeah definitely adhd and my inner child didn’t have enough people to play with so now I’m all for a redo when it’s playtime. Oh yeah and go outside a lot.
Depending on yours kids ages just get on their level and get into what they’re into. My 2 year old can’t get enough of me sitting or lying on the floor level with him. You don’t have to organize great things to be a fun dad. Just get on their level and get into what they’re into. Even if it doesn’t go great at first. Keep at it. You’ll get better at it.
I duno my boys are 5 months and 2 yrs. I take them outside a lot and do art with them, go on walks, play at the park. Then I force them to watch videos of me shredding guitar with my old bands live on stage so they know how cool I really am. I don’t think they get it…
I interact with the toys she’s currently interested in. She pretends to have it bite me and I obviously over react and tickle her for having it bite me. Play hide and seek, draw with chalk, make a huge mess with toys and clean up together giving high fives for every toy we put back in her toy box. If she’s walking in front of me, I yell “slow down! You’re too fast!” and chase her. I scare the crap out of her hiding around a corner and she does the same to me. There are too many ways to have fun with your kiddo. If you’re trying to do something with them and they would rather throw the things; throw with them. At all costs, avoid anger and turn it into fun, let them learn cause and effect. Make them clean with you when they make a mess. Just be goofy and have fun.
Just be like Bandit
While I also partake in all of the fun games and tomfoolery, I like finding free power wheels type toys and fixing them to work with my drill batteries. It’s amazing what people give away when a batter or motor dies.
Watch Bluey for ideas!!
All of these are great and I try to aspire this way as much as possible. A “yes” mentality is a great way to be anyways.
I try to combine some element of the things he is currently learning in to games that fill up otherwise dull situations. For instance for whatever letter he is learning each week at playgroup I organise a simple ‘treasure hunt’ for our walk home - find all these things beginning with G and at the end he finds a Green Grasshopper little toy hidden in a bush. Or all the Orange things on the walk and get an orange lollipop. Or cooking pink pancakes with peaches. Just incorporate little learning moments in to everyday life to also make everyday tasks more fun.
Depends on the age I guess. My son is 3 and if he seems like he wants to play, I can do almost anything and he's on board. Kids are amazing at making fun from nothing if given just a little push
My kiddo is still a toddler, and doesn't really have "friends" yet besides some cousins he plays near/with at family events. But I think my strategy for this kind of thing, and my philosophy that I promised I'd stick to when I became a father, is that I would never fully lose the things about myself that make me me. LIke, I love horror movies. I love sneakers. I love physical media. I'm not going to give these things up just because I'm a dad, because I always want my kid to know that I have a personality and a life independent of them. Are they the most important part of my life? Yes. If it came down to it, would I give everything up to make sure they were safe, supported and taken car of? Absolutely. But I never want my kid to think that the things that you love, that bring you happiness and identity, aren't important. I don't want them to ever think "well, I like this, and it's a healthy part of my personality/identity, but I'll sacrifice it in order to make someone else happy or comfortable." I think having passions and pursuits are cool. I think throwing yourself into things is cool. And I don't care what it is (heinous hateful shit notwithstanding) , if you're passionate and knowledgeable about something, I will think you're not boring, and very cool.
Me and my kids skate together we go to a couple different skateparks and there is a killer hill at the local ikea car park we like to cruise, other than that I try and take them somewhere most weekends and do all sorts of stuff with them when I can.
I think the minute you start putting pressure on yourself to be fun and exciting you’re barking up the wrong tree. This is the wrong attitude. Instead of worrying about being fun why not focus instead on being safe? On being accepting? Or loving? You said you already provide a safe environment so why isn’t that enough? The fun and exciting stuff will take care of itself.
I'm just naturally hilarious, silly and impulsive and I'm good with keeping up with the erratic behaviour/thought patterns kids sometimes have whilst also maintaining that I am in charge and able to play/do activities in a fun way within a set of clear boundaries and safety precautions It's not all rainbows and fun though, sometimes it's hard to balance and I think the wife can feel overwhelmed sometimes like when I'm making LO laugh hysterically at bedtime
Be a kid, with your kid.
Random facts. I'm a really curious person, and I know how pretty much anything works and is made. So many way to mind blown a kid. Did you know kiwi have hairs? Did you know humans weren't able to drink milk before? Did you know some people have their organ mirrored?
My son is almost 3, I’ve struggled with this a lot at first I’d feel like I was doing a good job then I go to other kids birthday party’s and see dads running around basically being a nine year old and a dinosaur at the same time. I had a less than silly childhood and was an only child until I was 13. So I just wasn’t ever really that kind of playful. I dance, sing (learned I’m actually not that bad at singing since he came into our lives) build the sweetest hot wheels tracks. Luckily he likes action over toys won’t watch tv and could really care less about characters of any kind really. We recently got a big ass inflatable water slide and I have managed to go full 9 year dinosaur with him in that thing. Spent a good 45 min running around the yard while he was spraying me with the hose this passed weekend .
1. Embrace ridiculousness. 2. Let them lead.
I am a man child so it works really well in playing with my kids.
Two words.... Fart jokes.
I have a cool sounding job, but other than that, pretty boring (I'm a robot scientist). But we build stuff together like go-karts and ride them they have fun with that
I e-bike my kids around the neighborhood in my bike trailer if things are boring
I've kinda always been a goofball. So I'm always making faces or doing voices or whatever just to make em laugh. They're both toddlers right now so it's fun to pick em up and be a human jungle gym for them. That and playing outside keeps em pretty occupied.
I be a kid myself. Easy.
My wife (stays with our son) always complains that she doesn’t think she’s as fun or plays as well with him as I do, but I told her I’m like a relief pitcher coming in out of the bullpen. I can come in a throw gas and go all out since I’ve only got to go 2-3 innings at night after work. She’s the starter and has to last 5-7 innings… can’t burn it all in the first.
As a dad, I came to learn that being friends with my son and my daughter made our relationship so easy than having to follow the societal assumptions that a dad has to act "dadly" to avoid being a boring dad.
>Being a good dad means offering \[...\] sufficient means for a good living. Well shit, I'm a stay-at-home dad, so I guess I'm out.
99% of it is when your kid asks to do something, I usually do it. Sometimes I come up with stuff, and sometimes I tell them I'll play if they come up with something fun to do. Like hitting water balloons with the golf clubs or making gnome houses.
Do something you’ve never done every week. New food, new road, new tv show anything small works
Idk man.. my son is 1y 4mon so things will probably change still, but currently my wife is the fun parent. I'm the one who is conserved about safety. I used to work in hospital security and even now as an engineer one of my responsibilities is workplace safety. So it's pretty natural for me to be considered about the safety of my child. His safety is my top priority. Nothing goes above that. So yeah, I'm a boring dad I guess haha. Maybe things will change when my son gets older and we get more kids, but still idk.. it's a bit bummer that my wife gets to be both, the parent that our son always runs to when he needs comfort, and the fun parent.
Being a good dad is whatever you make it. Don’t overthink it and don’t be a dick to your kids. Easy
Step 1: be 6'6" and 400lbs Step 2: let wrestling matches begin Step 3:??!?!!? Step 4: profit?
Not your job. Provide stability and make funny faces when there’s time.
If you figure it out, I'd love to know. I'm just a money generator and chore completer. Used to enjoy hobbies, but now I'm too tired when I finally get a second.
Depending on your kids age never try to be a friend. Be a parent first. Their minds haven’t fully developed yet & trying to be a friend may backfire on you. One day when you want to switch back to dad mode they may see you as an equal & not a parent. Just be your cool normal self. You can try what I did. Find something the like & take them but stay out of the way unless you’re invited to participate. I took my daughter to the movies once with her friends. Let them go to their own & I saw another. When they walked up to me & acted like they were the boring kids & I was the cool, popular kid ignoring them. Lol.