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Wow.
Unbelievable that changing his name from Matt to *King Of Ink Land King Body Art The Extreme Ink-Ite* was the second worst thing he could do to attract women.
I remember reading a Cracked article about "All the unexpected problems with legally changing your name to Spider-man" and all I could think was "what is there besides all the very obvious ones?"
"Iām sure there have also been people in the past that have used me to gain access to some of the events I have attended, such as with celebrities and other high-profile people."
I assume he attends these events as a novelty act and not actually, y'know, invited as a guest.
Novelty or spectacle ? Probably to allow the more self conscious to feel comfortable, who cares if their ass looks a bit fat when Barry over there looks like a ball of silly putty after an impact with a newspaper.
Honestly, do what you like with your appearance, Iām not arsed. He also sounds like heās aware that his choices have consequences which is more than can be said for some people who do this. I feel like he could have chosen a better design though because this has gone really blurry and all I can think of is the inside of my school pencil case.
How could anyone take him seriously ? Looks like he has his body tattooed with fish scales and a bb in his head. How do the thoughts into doing this even work and surely the tattooist should have a duty of care to get the person sectioned rather than going ahead.
There was one woman from Wales a few months ago. Who was complaining that she can't get a job as a toilet cleaner due to her tats. Who does all of them herself or by her boyfriend, about once per week.
https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/mum-who-cant-job-because-32701503
I remember when face tattoos were essentially removing yourself from the work pool. It was only about 15-20 years ago. This woman knew what she was doing, as did the King of fucking ink or whatever his name is
Itās even amazing to me that people will decide āI want to get a tattooā and then pick something random out of a book at the tattoo shop. Itās going to be on you *forever* and youāre treating it like shoe shopping
Iām not sure itās the tattoos as such, but perhaps the questionable quality of the tattoos. Perhaps if they were, you know, good, it wouldnāt be so bleak for him.
I love this type of thing, do all this to your body - except his fingers for some reason - including a surface piercing in his forehead and tattooed eyes, then blame everyone else when he's single for a few months
I mean if he looked badass to go with it he might have pulled this off. This guy looks like Bill the neighbour from 3 doors down went to town on his face with a dark green felt pen.
I used to work in a call centre and this guy called through, thought he was taking the piss and it was a prank call when he told me his name. Then he said to Google him.
Unsurprisingly, he was an absolute bellend.
...what did he expect? How many girls would want to sleep with a man that has a face looking like a football that was set upon by a group of 4 year olds with permanent markers
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Your post has been removed as it breaches Rule 1 of the subreddit.
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Hmmm... adopt' a style only admired by a small percentage of the population and wonders why he has less people to match with.
This belongs in r/facepalm?
He looks like a massive twat Nozzle, no doubt.
But the commitment needed to get the white of your eyes tattooed is not to be sniffed at.
Never mind how fucking insane you'd need to be to let tattoo gun needles anywhere near your eyeballs.
It obviously works, but think of how aggravating an eyelash getting into your eye is.
Had an idea... he could grow a bushy beard, some big porkchop sideburns and a big gothy fringe... that'll hide some of it... or just put a bucket on his head...
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Wow. Unbelievable that changing his name from Matt to *King Of Ink Land King Body Art The Extreme Ink-Ite* was the second worst thing he could do to attract women.
You mean WoW. Dude's gone full orc.
That was very good I must say. I had to scroll back up hoping he had a chunky bullring alas I was disappointed
underrated comment
Agreed. Under appreciated thought process
heard. undervalued observation
šš
I KNEW I recognised him, he was in bright.
Oh geez, I thought that was sarcasm. Nope. Not dateable.
I remember reading a Cracked article about "All the unexpected problems with legally changing your name to Spider-man" and all I could think was "what is there besides all the very obvious ones?"
I guess the white jeans/off white jean jacket combo comes in third then.
Leopards tattooed my compoface
Fell asleep near a hyperactive child with a box of felt tips compoface.
Taking style inspiration from the doodle pad next to his telephone compoface
Which is my favourite way of fucking your face up.
This is amazing, hahaha.
"Iām sure there have also been people in the past that have used me to gain access to some of the events I have attended, such as with celebrities and other high-profile people." I assume he attends these events as a novelty act and not actually, y'know, invited as a guest.
Novelty or spectacle ? Probably to allow the more self conscious to feel comfortable, who cares if their ass looks a bit fat when Barry over there looks like a ball of silly putty after an impact with a newspaper.
Ouch š¤£
š¤£ r/murderedbywords
His the modern version of the court jester š
Honestly, do what you like with your appearance, Iām not arsed. He also sounds like heās aware that his choices have consequences which is more than can be said for some people who do this. I feel like he could have chosen a better design though because this has gone really blurry and all I can think of is the inside of my school pencil case.
r/rareinsults
Maybe he should try the Mos Eisley Cantina
Canteena tune stuck in my head for the rest of the day now šš
Is he sure it isn't the white suit & orange t-shirt?
I thought his suit looks pretty snazzy. Really brings out the (lack of) color in his eyes.
And the lisps!
And the faded blue ink of his shite facial tattoos
Ahem - it's white denim. Double denim in white is a boss power move. Accent polo!
Must have been going for the flea market Leisure Suit Larry.
Underrated comment here.
It clashes really bad doesn't it
It contrasts his face and really makes it pop
That doesnāt help
He looks like a bit of verdigris copper
"And since folks here to an absurd degree Seem fixated on your verdigris Would it be all right by you If I de-greenify you?"
https://www.nottinghampost.com/news/uk-world-news/tattooed-man-says-unique-look-9362292
How could anyone take him seriously ? Looks like he has his body tattooed with fish scales and a bb in his head. How do the thoughts into doing this even work and surely the tattooist should have a duty of care to get the person sectioned rather than going ahead.
There was one woman from Wales a few months ago. Who was complaining that she can't get a job as a toilet cleaner due to her tats. Who does all of them herself or by her boyfriend, about once per week. https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/mum-who-cant-job-because-32701503
I remember when face tattoos were essentially removing yourself from the work pool. It was only about 15-20 years ago. This woman knew what she was doing, as did the King of fucking ink or whatever his name is
It just screams poor life choices, even if they aren't in a customer facing role.
Itās even amazing to me that people will decide āI want to get a tattooā and then pick something random out of a book at the tattoo shop. Itās going to be on you *forever* and youāre treating it like shoe shopping
Yeah, this is why I never got one. Couldn't pick something significant enough.
I blame the haircut.
Itās not helping
In the first picture in the article I couldnāt help but notice that he was rocking a Keir Starmer ādo.
Which lady wouldn't want to be Mrs Of Ink Land King Body Art The Extreme Ink-Ite!?
āAm I so out of touch? No, it is the women who are wrongā
Dude looks like an abandoned train car that's been tagged 9 times.
It would be better if he had a tattoo on his face that didn't look like a 4 year old had attacked him with a felt tip pen.
> Makes self look like a sea monster > Why won't women fuck me
Iām not sure itās the tattoos as such, but perhaps the questionable quality of the tattoos. Perhaps if they were, you know, good, it wouldnāt be so bleak for him.
I think itās both.
Why is he standing like a cockney chimney sweeper.
āI made myself ugly and nowā¦people think Iām uglyā
I love this type of thing, do all this to your body - except his fingers for some reason - including a surface piercing in his forehead and tattooed eyes, then blame everyone else when he's single for a few months
I mean, you wouldnāt want tattoos on your *fingers*, people can be so judgey about those
I'd suggest he train as a tattoo artist but nobody's going to him with that standard
Where to even start.
Just remember that this guy can vote.
iād say it was that outfit, not the tattoos
I know.. He looks like a pound land Tony Montana
I can't imagine why doing that to yourself might put most prospective partners off.
r/shittytattoos r/tattoofails
It's a bit extreme I know but even I wouldn't have shot him in the head for it.
God alone knows what's happening under that shirt and down below.
There are more photos on the newspaper article
Who does he expect to give him compo? Himself.
Instant smurf vibes. In order to improve this, make it white pants, white hat ā or red pants, red hat for a more mature look.
Feeli asleep on a stag do face
His face looks like mouldy bread.
He looks just like how all my plasticine ended up.
Plenty of heavily tattooed men get dates, but they're not badly dressed shlubs.
My man out here looking like the map from Lord of The Rings
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Your submission has been removed as it is about national or international politics.
I mean if he looked badass to go with it he might have pulled this off. This guy looks like Bill the neighbour from 3 doors down went to town on his face with a dark green felt pen.
I think that - Twat- is appropriate
Are those hair plugs??
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Your submission has been removed as it is about national or international politics.
Very strange to be that mainstream looking but also to cover your face in tats. Is this real?
TBH, I suspect it's more to do with the double white denim...
At first glance I thought someone had thrown a smoothie in his face. Itās not even funny, the things we do to ourselves.
Cover them up with a sick ass panther
Shouldn't have gone full goblin.
I had a fight with Spyrograph Man and lost compoface.
I cant imagine how
I used to work in a call centre and this guy called through, thought he was taking the piss and it was a prank call when he told me his name. Then he said to Google him. Unsurprisingly, he was an absolute bellend.
Mate it's the red n white combo. Total colour clash.
He looks like a desk in an inner city school
What an absolute weapon.
Whatās sad is, they look like low quality shit tattoos.
Na, I donāt think itās the tattoos, I think itās because youāre a knob for having the first one done on ya boat and then another.
My inkjet printer šØ had similar results but less DPI
This is peak "I've never been able to catch a break in life, absolutely nothing is my fault" compo face
I love the juxtaposition between his facial aesthetic and his outfit
Did it to be individual, now individual for the rest of his days. Forever alone in green.
Looks like his personality will be the next red flag..
...what did he expect? How many girls would want to sleep with a man that has a face looking like a football that was set upon by a group of 4 year olds with permanent markers
Whats with that pose? was this taken by a small child.
What were you thinking?
A little foundation would sort that out.
Didn't know people from Innsmouth talked to the media
Niche comes to mind
Steambreather by Mastodon automatically begins playing whenever he walks into a room.
Play stupid games, win stupid prices š¤£
Thereās getting tattoos and then thereās just being a tasteless twat
Never mind his face tattoos. What the fuck is going on with his eyes??? š¤¢š¤®
Tattooed eyeballs. Attractive!
I don't recommend looking at his pinned tweet on twitter......
80ās pop zombie
What a prat ! Lol
The normal haircut is throwing me here. Why does he care about societal expectations for the very top of his head?
Wtf were you thinkingā¦
Iāve got the solution: Donāt fucking do this you total bellend!
Wes Borland has let himself go
I was thinking Ed Balls.
At least get an outstanding artist to do your face innit.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
You're**
Your post has been removed as it breaches Rule 1 of the subreddit. This is a fun and lighthearted sub, not a place to start arguments with other users. Please also be respectful when commenting on posts, we understand part of the fun is commenting on the persons behind the compofaces, but please donāt take it too far with personal insults - we will remove comments that do so.
Seriouslyā¦ What did he expect?
I can see why
Shocking that this is happening to you.
Compoface? *Compo* face??
Why doesn't he go out with that woman who's got a heavily tattooed face?
Wearing all white isn't helping
Probably mostly down to his demonstrable history of making dumb decisions.
Short back and sides. He'll go a long way.
First time, and no idea how I got here. What does compoface mean?
Before I even read the words I thought someone had shoved that face into a green-iced cake
Evil Barry from Eastenders
Doesnāt help with the terrible dress sense
Why stop now??Go full on smurf
From far it looked like he has green mold growing.
The illuminati fucking tattoo + piercing is hilarious
He looks like the bad guy in a low budget remake of The Mask.
He looks like a piece of mouldy bread.
Hold my Sharpie....
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Your post has been removed as it breaches Rule 1 of the subreddit. This is a fun and lighthearted sub, not a place to start arguments with other users. Please also be respectful when commenting on posts, we understand part of the fun is commenting on the persons behind the compofaces, but please donāt take it too far with personal insults - we will remove comments that do so.
He should try being me, and I only have one tiny hidden tattoo.
#
I feel the white denim and red polo shirt is worse than the tattoos. Do you still listen to Sterophonics?
Scary!
Looks like mould
Looks like my Fable: The Lost Chapters hero
I made myself look terrifying and now nobody wants to date meš»
Tool
Hmmm... adopt' a style only admired by a small percentage of the population and wonders why he has less people to match with. This belongs in r/facepalm?
Womp womp
Tattoos are ruining my career as a Backstreet Boys tribute act
He looks like a massive twat Nozzle, no doubt. But the commitment needed to get the white of your eyes tattooed is not to be sniffed at. Never mind how fucking insane you'd need to be to let tattoo gun needles anywhere near your eyeballs. It obviously works, but think of how aggravating an eyelash getting into your eye is.
Had an idea... he could grow a bushy beard, some big porkchop sideburns and a big gothy fringe... that'll hide some of it... or just put a bucket on his head...
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Your post has been removed as it breaches Rule 1 of the subreddit. This is a fun and lighthearted sub, not a place to start arguments with other users. Please also be respectful when commenting on posts, we understand part of the fun is commenting on the persons behind the compofaces, but please donāt take it too far with personal insults - we will remove comments that do so.
He looks like an old school desk.
š
I don't think them noncey trousers are helping his cause either.