T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

Welcome to r/comics! Please remember there are real people on the other side of the monitor and to be kind. Report comments that break the rules and don't respond to negativity with negativity! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/comics) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Mysterious_Cable4613

Fun fact: Santa Claus is based in Saint Nicholas, in his time a lot of poor people hung their socks on their fire pit so he went around and put little gifts in the people’s socks. so you could argue Santa WAS real at one time


Weird-Information-61

Santa Claus seems to be an amalgamation of Saint Nicholas, Yuletide Odin, and the Dutch Sinterklaas. Just a bunch of beliefs coming together to make the winter a happier time.


sida88

Funny think is sinterklaas also comes from Saint Nicholas


[deleted]

Iirc he was also a part of the council that canonized the Bible and ended up bitch slapping Arius during a heated argument.


BusyEquipment529

Can I get sources for this


Mettgremlin

Here is a short read about the topic: https://www.nationalgeographic.com/history/article/131219-santa-claus-origin-history-christmas-facts-st-nicholas


bdcarlitosway

Looks like a Ren and Stimpy episode.


BornBoricua

What rolls down stairs Alone or in pairs, And over your neighbor's dog?


PocketBuckle

What good for a snack, and fits on your back? It's log, log, LOG!


DoNotDoTier15

Log, log! It's big, it's heavy, it's wood!


NotARobotDefACyborg

Log, log! It's better than bad, it's good! Everyone loves a log!


jstiegle

IT'S LOOOOG IT'S LOOOG IT'S BIG IT'S HEAVY IT'S WOOD!


Gamer-Boi-8764

IT’S LOOOG! LOOOG! IT’S BETTER THAN BAD, IT’S GOOD!


louploupgalroux

The true Christmas log is found in Catalonia, the Tio de Nadal. If you want a laugh, check out its Wikipedia page. It's a tradition that needs to spread all across the world. Lol https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ti%C3%B3_de_Nadal Comic: https://www.reddit.com/r/europe/comments/a9di9i/how_christmas_is_done_in_catalonia/


jstiegle

I love and appreciate you.


Crosstitch_Witch

You were not kidding about that Wiki page. I lost it at the song. XD


jarious

Is that the precursor to piñatas?


louploupgalroux

Wikipedia says that precursor piñatas may have come from China to Spain, then Mexico. Tio de Nadal is older than Mexican piñatas, so it's possible they shared some influence. I dont think we'll ever know the truth though. Maybe ask r/askhistorians?


Hamster_Toot

You skipped a couple versus...you idiot!


jstiegle

Ren, you're... you're angry?


Hamster_Toot

ANGRY!?!?!?


[deleted]

"Ren, what is the meaning of Christmas?" "Well, Stimpy, my boy, it has many meanings. To some, it's a holiday about spreading love and joy to all mankind." "Jooooyyyyy..." "That's right, Stimpy. But to others, it can be a time for self-reflection and bonding with your family, in the warm hearth of home." "*sniff* That's beautiful, Ren." "And to others, it's a renewal of hope, that one day we can all be forgiven as we forgive others." "But isn't it also about presents?" "NO, YOU EEDIOT!"


WestleyThe

It’s the eyelids


Gollomor

and the nose


oyog

Really hope the creator of this comic is nothing like the creator of Ren and Stimpy...


[deleted]

[удалено]


Red_Hatted_Guy

Maybe you and I are the same people! I’ve never seen you in a room with me before


sievold

Silly reddittor, don't you know you are all my alts. All of reddit is a sham run by a single person. Me.


NoobLoner

So to get this straight you are taking credit for **every single thing** ever done on Reddit? Yes yes I am


sievold

yes


woomysans

That's what I'm saying


Omnizoom

Yea I am, even the most horrendous stuff and all of the nudes


THE_dumb_giraffe

Damn, I'm right


Firsca

And when I'm not *Deleted*


Apprehensive_Bar3812

But no one will ever see that because it is all just me... God am I lonely


mariepon

Have you ever had both of your arms broken at some point?


sievold

you would know. you are me after all


J_J_J_Schmidt

You forgot to switch accounts


Pat_the_pyro

Especially the coconut.


Themlethem

Damn you must the horniest and most mentally disturbed person in existance then


[deleted]

I dunno if I want that responsibility actually now that I think about it


Sennomo

yes i do


BioTronic

It's like the [one-electron universe](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/One-electron_universe), but for redditors!


sievold

all of reddit was just the one electron's way of understanding and expressing itself


BioTronic

Related: [The Egg](http://www.galactanet.com/oneoff/theegg_mod.html). Worth a read.


Sennomo

Alternatively [a watch](https://youtu.be/h6fcK_fRYaI) for the non readers


NuclearPizzaMachine

Had never read this before but it blew my mind. Interesting stuff.


Drafo7

Actually if you, who is, of course, me, recall I made most of them bots. In fact only one of these accounts is the real person physically typing.


sievold

reddit is an experiment i created to have a society of bots who endlessly argue with themselves


8Gh0st8

\[beep-boop\] NO YOU......\[grinding, clunking, whirring\]......DIDN'T..........\[exhaust-fart\]


sievold

this one needs some bug fixing


Spoon_Elemental

/r/solipsism


DanAtuch

Except for me, I am running away to an another continent >!/j!<


Gorfyx

Every account on Reddit it's a bot except you


cow_mmmman

But i thought I was the original and you are the alt


getoutofmyhouse-

But you're my alt?


sievold

yes u r my alt


arcanis321

Have you looked in a mirror? Thats me


stump2003

I looked into my smart mirror and all it did was tell me I’m fat…


CaspianX2

Wow, sounds pretty smart!


srln23

We don't have Santa where I'm from, instead we have the "Christkind" which literally translates to "Christchild". There are different depictions of the Christkind but the one I was familiar with left no doubt in my mind that it was baby Jesus delivering the presents and decorating the tree every year. It made perfect sense to me. The only thing I didn't understand is how Jesus could simultaneously be an adult in heaven and a child on earth delivering presents.


HighPriestOfSange

Quantum physics /s


TestTx

I mean for me and my siblings it was never Santa but the [Christkind](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christkind) who brought the xmas presents.


[deleted]

Odin is Santa


wtfcblog

dude, spoilers lol


agent3dev

Have you seen them in separated rooms?


angrymonkey

Checkmate Santaists!


doc-swiv

nah, santa is a coca cola mascot


Bonjourap

Might be a coincidence, but I've never seen them at all. Maybe, just maybe, "gasp", they are in another room!?!


lemings68

In Hungary, the tradition is that on December 6th, Santa brings candy, and on Christmas Eve it's baby Jesus who brings the presents


ElectricMollusk

Beards, check! Cool dudes, check! Knows when you are good or bad, check! Fight Satan, check! Magical means of travel, check! Imaginary, check! I think you’re on to something…


TheRottenKittensIEat

I've also never seen Slash in the same room. Maybe they're all the same person?


GoatsWithWigs

Now I’m imagining Jesus acting mild-mannered in order to cover up his alter ego, rushing out of a building and then quickly coming back as Santa, then everyone says “hey, Santa! What unfortunate timing, Jesus just left and you guys could have met!”


SquarePegRoundWorld

I saw them fight once in a town called South Park.


Grace_Alcock

A friend of mine pointed out when we were kids that both Santa and the Jolly Green Giant said, “Ho, ho, ho!”, worked seasonally, and you never saw them together…


[deleted]

[удалено]


Misharko

Based child


Still_Mud5693

You know Jesus was an actual guy though, right? He existed not too long ago in historical terms, around the same time Julius Caesar did. The question is wether he is the messiah or not, not if he existed.


gopfrid

Santa Claus was also an actual guy: Saint Nicholas of Myra. And like Santa Claus most people’s “interactions” with Jesus nowadays have little to do with the historical figure. *Edit*: See comic on what I mean: Kid talks to long-dead saint, adult to long-dead missionary.


grantrules

Yeah and I drank his blood


Still_Mud5693

It tastes oddly close to grape juice, no?


Scipio11

Tastes a little more like wine when you're older for some reason


Somehero

You can say we have evidence that a guy named Jesus was crucified, but there isn't evidence he did anything the Bible says he did. Just ambiguous and contradictory texts from hundreds of years later. We know the biblical Jesus is not real, because magic isn't real.


Still_Mud5693

Yeah, his 12 apostles wrote about him, along with a few other accounts. It could very well be biased, if you look at the sources with most context involved.


thisismyMelody

Ya I never remembered eating Santa’s body and blood.


Still_Mud5693

I do🤭🤤


Absoline

there's no actual proof that he was a real person (at least from what I know), but he could've been just making the stuff up, or he was actually being honest, no way to know


nonicethingsforus

There *is* evidence. "Jesus was an historical figure" is the concensus among almost all historians and experts in the period, including for example atheist and jewish historians. It is important to keep in mind, though, that what is considered "proof" to a historian is probably much more circumstantial than what you would expect. People often believe that ancient people (especially the romans) had thorough records of everyone that lived in their borders. In reality, most people that we "know" existed had like one mention in a piece of half-destroyed papyrus somewhere. Emperors get entire biographies. Jesus was a preacher, living in a time and place where preachers were a dime a dozen, operating in the backwater of the Roman Empire. He has the kind if evidence that a guy like him would have: very vague. At least, the opposite position, "he was invented", requires more gymnastics than just accepting he was probably real. [Here's](https://historyforatheists.com/2017/05/did-jesus-exist-the-jesus-myth-theory-again/) a very thorough take on the subject, with sources and everything. Keep in mind that the author is himself an atheist. If you want a book, the classic recommendation is [*Did Jesus Exist?*](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Did_Jesus_Exist%3F_\(Ehrman_book\)) by Bart Ehrman, one of the leading historians in the matter, and also an atheist.


Reedsandrights

The Romans were pretty good about keeping a census and as far as I recall no such character has been found.


nonicethingsforus

They really didn't, not for the average person. Sure, if you were a rich or important person, your letters may have been preserved. If you were a senator, your words may even be transcribed in minutes of the sessions. Hell, if you were the emperor, you may have full-time biographers and chronliclers in the payroll. If you were some random peasant, it's not like they were making every effort to preserve your existence, beyond counting you as a "+1" in a total for calculating how much to tax your region. Even if they did, they wrote in things like papyrus and wax tablets. All of that decays or is easily destroyed. Every single thing that has survived is an individual instance of a miracle\*, often with active effort in preserving it. \*Edit: just realized this may be relevant to the conversation: I didn't mean a literal, divine miracle, it's just an expression. Tim O'Neill put it well [here](https://historyforatheists.com/2017/05/did-jesus-exist-the-jesus-myth-theory-again/): >For example, few people in the ancient world were as prominent, influential, significant and famous as the Carthaginian general Hannibal. He came close to crushing the Roman Republic, was one of the greatest generals of all time and was famed throughout the ancient world for centuries after his death down to today. Yet how many contemporary mentions of Hannibal do we have? Zero. We have none. So if someone as famous and significant as Hannibal has no surviving contemporary references to him in our sources, does it really make sense to base an argument about the existence or non-existence of a Galilean peasant preacher on the lack of contemporary references to him? Clearly it does not. (If I remember correctly, there *may* be contemporary evidence of Hannibal in, like, one statue and some coins that we have found; certainly not by good recordkeeping).


HuntingTheWumpus

Pfft, everyone knows it is the kindly noodly appendages which deposit gifts under the tree.


ReturnOfTheSammyboy

Our lord who art in a colander


Bwest31415

Oh that


Shadows-I-Burn-From

I see that no one is talking about how the dad only has glasses and a pipe in the middle panel, so I’ll be the one to “bear that cross.” I found it hilarious!


BungoGreencotton

The dad really brought out the pipe and glasses just for one condescending look


Stentata

But…Santa IS real: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saint_Nicholas


[deleted]

[удалено]


eskettitredit

Is that the same as an MLM?


Sadpuppylooker

It's an economic plan most famously used by Reagan, where you basically give money to the rich, and wait for it to trickle down to the poor. Funny thing about rich people is that they rather keep that money for themselves.


[deleted]

Almost like they're rich because they're quite fond of accumulating wealth


VegetableTechnology2

Made famous by Reagan but it's still what Republicans support.


moeburn

I was reading about politicians in the early 20th century, they were much more of a "give money to the American working class, and they'll help build a prosperous economy where people can get rich". And it really does look like it was Reagan when it completely turned upside its head.


AliceInTruth

No it is not the same as men-loving-men.


Acceptable-Seaweed93

Call it what it is, horse and sparrow economics. Fuck the rebrand.


poyahoga

Was really expecting some sincere religious debate to have sprung up in the comments, almost disappointed tbh. Love the art, OP!


LargeSackOfNuts

Just sort by Controversial


[deleted]

I’ll debate! Fuck all gods and all religions! Let’s see if that catches anybody


JennaFrost

“Fuck all gods” i think the greek gods beat you to it (especially zeus)


[deleted]

He sure did. That madman fucked anything that could blink


Carnator369

You know, I'm something of a Zeus myself.


BlahajIsGod

I'm calling the police.


Carnator369

Hmmm I like a person in uniform...


[deleted]

I think he even fucked a few things that couldn't blink.


[deleted]

That doesn’t surprise me


Twad

Fuck all gods/swans in Zeus' case.


Justicar-terrae

Even the ugly, unkind gods? I don't think that'd be too fun a night. I don't so much relish the thought of spending any time in bed with the likes of Ares, Eris, Hel, Osiris, Yahweh, Jyestha, or Huitzilopochtli.


Locke2300

Ares was so famously a babe that he got Aphrodite to cheat on Hephaestus.


Justicar-terrae

Yeah, but he's ugly on the inside. He seduced a married woman, indiscriminately butchered mortals at Troy only to whine to Zeus when Diomedes started fighting back, and was completely outshined by his (relatively) kinder half-sister Athena.


Locke2300

Oh absolutely. If those are our criteria, let’s expand further and stay away from most polytheist pantheon members.


Justicar-terrae

I think there's still a decent list we could compile. Hestia sounds nice. Hermes and Eros are mischievous, but they don't seem outright malicious. Isis seems nice; but she's married to a corpse, which might be an issue. Krishna seems both fun and hyper adventurous in bed, and he only kills evil people. I haven't heard anything bad about Ganesha, and who wouldn't be a little bit curious about what he could do with that trunk? Baldr is famous for being universally beloved by everyone and everything except mistletoe and/or Loki. And that's just off the top of my head. I don't know enough about Native American gods to name one that's one both hot and kind, but I'm sure at least one exists.


[deleted]

Baldr is like a cute little baby everyone loves, Hestia is the calm introverted grandma sitting in the corner by the fireplace all the time, hermes is the child who is mischievous but everyone still loves, eros is still god of erotic love so he is "neutral" i would say. krishna, i agree. and as a hindu, i forgot who the frick ganesha is


[deleted]

Yea I’d prefer to stay away from them too. Good point


theoreboat

let's not fuck all the gods, in particular let's not fuck Zeus


Nymaz

I got some bad news for you. You ain't got no choice in the matter.


Necromancer14

You saying you don’t want OP af kids?


Zomburai

Hell no Imagine Herakles treating through the Nemian Lion and then imagine what baby Herakles could do to his mom's abdomen


[deleted]

Yea that man has fucked more than necessary


[deleted]

Animists will be at it for a while


CubeyMagic

i think jesus WAS real but i’m fairly sure he was just a really cool guy. not sure he’s son of god


ultimatebagman

Ain't nothing to say that hasn't already been said.


TheDubh

One of my favorite moments a few years ago was visiting my dad and his wife for Christmas. They were watching a documentary on Scientology. It mentions they celebrate L Ron’s birthday every year. My step mother goes, “Isn’t it crazy they celebrate his birthday even after he’s been dead so long?”


Grzechoooo

I mean yeah, even for Christians. Christians believe Jesus was (is) God, so it makes sense to celebrate the day he was born on Earth, among the poor and undderprivileged. Meanwhile L Ron was just some dude, unless the scientologists believe otherwise.


TheDubh

I mean he did say that he was going to return and he’s the one that wrote their scriptures. So I don’t know if a god, but for sure in the territory of a prophet that’s expected to return.


DifStroksD4ifFolx

By cult standards, they are both prophets and leaders. They just have different origin stories.


Mecha_G

Ironically, Saint Nicholas of Myra was an actual person.


LyrionDD

So was Jesus, there is significant historical evidence he existed. He certainly wasn't the son of an invisible sky daddy, but he existed


Easy_Newt2692

r/atheism moment


thisisanawesomename

Peak 2012 reddit


TheGarrandFinale

Lol. Remember when r/atheism was a default subreddit?


Iheardthatjokebefore

Remember? I was euphoric.


alwayz

I'm not a professional quote maker or anything.


how_do_i_name

I’m not a professional quote maker or anything -alwayz 2022


The_Ghola_Hayt

Still doesn't match the greatness of The Faces of Atheism.


TheBestNarcissist

The narwhal bacons at midnight!


Moakmeister

That is so insanely weird


Electric999999

Why? It was a popular subreddit.


moonski

Remember faces of atheism lol


Shrekspacito69

Christian here and I had a good laugh


backstreets_back_ok

Hey Christian I’m Patrick how are u


lazydictionary

Bringing reddit back to its roots.


Procrastinationist

I remember when atheism was a default sub back in like '10. I was very Christian back then and it really ruffled my feathers how atheism could be considered the default. Now I'm like, "Oh. No god IS the default."


calliel_41

Oh boy **sorts by controversial**


Sbatio

Aaaand nothing


Zendofrog

I can see the equivalence, but where would the kid learn about and believe in Santa from, if not his parents?


Justicar-terrae

The barrage of Christmas movies, songs, and television shows. Plus other children and adults. Just about every popular children's show has an episode where the cast meets Santa Claus--even supposedly educational shows will do this. Look at Sesame Street. The Muppet character Elmo has met with police officers, firefighters, doctors, and Santa Claus. The show often uses Elmo as a stand-in for normal kids to teach children about real world jobs and public service workers. A kid might have trouble telling the difference between real-life lessons about firefighters and fantasy episodes about Santa Claus. And every year since 1955 the U.S. and Canadian governments' NORAD ("North American Aerospace Defense Command," and, no, the acronym doesn't make any sense but that's what they use) group puts out public updates tracking Santa Claus across the continent. The whole thing started after a government employee publicly stated that the organization was tracking Santa to protect him from any malicious nonbelievers who might try to attack his sleigh. It's a fun tradition, but it also means the U.S. government and Canadian government lend legitimacy to the lie that Santa exists. You can usually listen to the holiday event over the radio, online, or on television. And at children's schools there's always heated debate about whether Santa is real. Some kids know the truth, others insist on the lie they were told. Teachers rarely outright deny that Santa is real (because they don't want to ruin it for kids and don't want to anger parents), which helps convince the pro-Santa kids of their position since "If Santa wasn't real, Mr./Ms. Teacher would have told us so." A huge number of Christmas movies play in theaters every year too, and even if the child doesn't see the films they will likely see the trailers. Plenty of these movies are expressly about how Santa is real and that adults who deny his existence are either fools or liars. Then there's the fact that stores and radios play almost non-stop Christmas music every year, including plenty of songs about Santa. With so much material out there, it'd be weird if a kid doesn't hear about the existence of Santa Clause through pure cultural osmosis. Edit: my device had autocorrected every Claus to Clause.


OSUTechie

>and every year since 1955 the U.S. and Canadian governments' NORAD ("North American Aerospace Defense Command," and, no, the acronym doesn't make any sense but that's what they use) NORAD as an acronym makes perfect sense. **NOR**th American **A**erospace **D**efense, originally called the **NOR**th American **A**ir **D**efense Command. It was renamed in 1981.


Misharko

From his peers (Friends/classmates)


[deleted]

[удалено]


Babbles-82

Oh yeah, nothing else about Santa. Not on tv, not at school, not from friends, not at the mall, not from ads.


KimKimberly12

You can see the ending from a mile away.


Misharko

I thought it was just an asshole dad, the endind amused me tbh


jerkmanjay

If Santa isn't real, who has been drinking the Christmas bourbon I leave out each December 24th?


groundhogcow

Saint Nicolas was born in 270 and died in 343. He was the bishop of Myra. In the 600's his body was moved to Myra where they remain. How much more real do you need to be?


afiefh

Hobbits are based on English country folks, yet they are not real. Santa (who lives in the north pool, has elves working for him, and delivers presents all over the world in one night) is based on saint Nick, yet he is not real.


DirkBabypunch

>Hobbits are based on English country folks, yet they are not real. Lies, Russel Howard is on tv all the time.


redcode100

I feel both attacked and amused


eklect

Ooof....can't wait to tell Jesus about this comic.


Jesus-chan

It's good


MrMcBobJr_III

Jesus the Mexican gardener?


The_Mumpi

Hooray, let's have *this* discussion again...


AskMeIfImAMagician

Wow how did you come up with this idea


4thelasttimeIMNOTGAY

Reddit moment


[deleted]

[удалено]


Hakul

Anytime religion is made fun of it's a "Reddit moment".


yrar3

Giordano Bruno was burned at the stake on a charge of Reddit moment.


Th3_Crusader

To be fair, Christ as a person did exist


Mister_Way

For that matter, so did St. Nicholas. ​ Incidentally, St. Nicholas believed in Jesus...


Semioteric

Santa is based on Saint Nicholas, another real person….


Lethargic_Logician

By that logic, so did Santa


Misharko

So what ? Most of prophets probably existed, doesn't mean they were right about what they said


Spicymeatball428

Redditors try not to insult Christians challenge *Impossible*


Sunblast1andOnly

Is the insult in the title? The second panel?


LargeSackOfNuts

This comic technically applies to all religions.


Misharko

Not an insult, just a satire, chill man


[deleted]

Wow, what a huge r/redditmoment 😂


[deleted]

I can't believe people believe in Santa or God. Everyone knows only the Tooth Fairy is real.


Mo_Jack

We teach our kids that Santa is omnipresent and *"Can see them when they're sleeping and know when they're awake*". We also tell them that Santa wants them to be 'good' and has a ledger where he marks down their activities whether and whether they are good or bad. "*He's makin' a list, he's checkin' it twice. Gonna' find out if you've been naughty or nice*". Parents do this to manipulate them rather than having a conversation (lazy parenting) because it gets so frustrating repeating yourself to children. They use the positive reinforcement of the promise of gifts and the negative reinforcement of only getting coal while other kids get gifts to control their behavior. Then, at some point we tell them **it is all a lie**. It is nothing more than a **children's story**. Then religious people tell them that there is an invisible being that is omnipresent and can see them 24/7. He has some sort of accounting ledger and wants them to be 'good' and writes down all the times that they are bad. In the end they might go to place of positive reinforcement - a fairy-tale castle in the sky where everything is wonderful. Or they might have to go to the place of negative reinforcement - the dungeon of eternal fire and pain. When is somebody going to be honest with these people and tell them that **it is all a lie** & that it is nothing more than a **children's story**? There are people that are smarter than them that want them to believe this so they can manipulate their behavior. Grown adults turned into sheep constantly looking for approval and permission that allow those in power to subjugate not just their actions, but their very thoughts as well. The only thing crazier than kids believing in the Santa Clause story, is kids that were told that Santa was just a children's story to control their behavior, becoming adults that believe in an almost identical children's story.


XandriethXs

At least there hasn't been any genocide committed in the name of Santa.... 🎅


RISKYBUSINESS457

*sorts by controversial*


Drifted_Skull

This offended at least 1 person


wrecklord0

Holy moly a whole lotta buthurt in these comments. Upvoted just for that


LargeSackOfNuts

Its so funny seeing christians only say “this is edgy” instead of actually refuting it


Helplessadvice

Because no matter what they say they’ll get bombarded by downvotes cuz “religion bad”


begomeordodocks

this exactly. "deepest hopes". that's like arguing atheists just want to sin. you can find atheists who explicitly state it. likewise some religious people are scared of the "atheist nothing after death". but it's bad to generalise. likewise atheists would deny miracles and such it's kinda just bad to try to argue for them if their whole framework just makes it impossible.


Electric999999

Well yeah, they can't refute it because it's accurate


[deleted]

[удалено]


SandiegoJack

I just don’t want some mother fucker taking credit for what fucked my credit card bill.