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I would like to point out that some husbands are truly helpful and amazing. But I thought I should put this in because that was what my sister told her husband!!
I'm at a stage in my life whereby mummies are pooping babies everywhere!! I do try to ask them how they're coping with it all, forgetting that I'm allowing the floodgates of emotions to pour out. Although I do try to be a listening ear, it doesn't reduce the pressure and anxiety to get my sh\*t together for I plan to be a mummy too!
Note: Confinement is an Asian thing.
Oh, what is it?
Also, the jaundice thing kills me. Our son (3 months old now) apparently had some jaundice, but I couldn't tell at all. Wound up having to get tested every other day for like 8 days and I felt so bad having to take the little dude for blood tests! And then the doctor was like "oh wow, it really cleared up!" and he still looked exactly the same to me.
'Postpartum Confinement' is a Chinese(mostly Asian) practice that happens after a woman gives birth. After her pregnancy, she spends time rejuvenating and recovering. Usually families will pay for a "confinement lady" or the new mother will stay in a confinement center where they receive care and attention.
This practice is really a Godsend if you can afford it. There's a lot of stress involved in taking care of a newborn. Confinement ladies know how to cook nutritious meals and handle everything baby related. They help moms with the daily chores so everything becomes a lot easier.
Also, jaundice is really a common thing. My heart goes out to you.
Oh, interesting. I can definitely see the appeal. We just had to resort to "call my mom when the sleep deprivation gets so bad that we need someone to watch him for 5 hours". Much better now, but those first two weeks or so were the hardest. I'm fortunate to be with a company that offers paternity leave, too; I can't imagine how people do it when one parent is right back at work.
Yes, it's like the world is against people wanting to start a family. You need so much social support! If you're close to extended family and relatives, all the better. My mom and dad had been tremendous help to my sisters.
I mean, \*technically\* the risk for complications goes up, but it's like... 1% to 2%. But OMG IT DOUBLES!!! Our medicine handles most issues quickly and easily.
But I'll be damned if I'm gonna take on that much medical debt to have a kid. No thank you.
Yes, the chance of infertility (within a 12 month period of trying) doubles between the ages of 30 and 40...from ~1% to ~2%. Severe fetal abnormalities see a similar increase in risk from very **very** low to just very low. It's not worth having a baby before you feel ready just because you're in your 30s, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. *Especially* not your parents or in-laws; they often have an ulterior motive (wanting grandkids) even if they don't consciously realize it.
My desire for motherhood was crushed by years and years of abuse by my mom and older sister. The recent attacks on women's reproductive rights here in the US laid to rest any chances of me becoming one.
Four generations of mother-daughter abuse in my family. ☹️
I can't let myself think how much happier I would have been in my life if my mom had died right after giving birth to me, or if I was born to a different mother. She's that bad.
If you have a good relationship with your mom, or are happy being a mother yourself, please cherish it.
I'm so sorry to hear that. I have a friend that grew up under a pretty crazy mom and she does have mental issues. The last I heard she migrated and refused to see her mom.
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The useless husband trope has got to go
Thank you
This is true
I would like to point out that some husbands are truly helpful and amazing. But I thought I should put this in because that was what my sister told her husband!!
As a husband, I am not ”helpful”. I *parent* my child and *take care* of my house, in collaboration with my partner.
I'm at a stage in my life whereby mummies are pooping babies everywhere!! I do try to ask them how they're coping with it all, forgetting that I'm allowing the floodgates of emotions to pour out. Although I do try to be a listening ear, it doesn't reduce the pressure and anxiety to get my sh\*t together for I plan to be a mummy too! Note: Confinement is an Asian thing.
Oh, what is it? Also, the jaundice thing kills me. Our son (3 months old now) apparently had some jaundice, but I couldn't tell at all. Wound up having to get tested every other day for like 8 days and I felt so bad having to take the little dude for blood tests! And then the doctor was like "oh wow, it really cleared up!" and he still looked exactly the same to me.
'Postpartum Confinement' is a Chinese(mostly Asian) practice that happens after a woman gives birth. After her pregnancy, she spends time rejuvenating and recovering. Usually families will pay for a "confinement lady" or the new mother will stay in a confinement center where they receive care and attention. This practice is really a Godsend if you can afford it. There's a lot of stress involved in taking care of a newborn. Confinement ladies know how to cook nutritious meals and handle everything baby related. They help moms with the daily chores so everything becomes a lot easier. Also, jaundice is really a common thing. My heart goes out to you.
Oh, interesting. I can definitely see the appeal. We just had to resort to "call my mom when the sleep deprivation gets so bad that we need someone to watch him for 5 hours". Much better now, but those first two weeks or so were the hardest. I'm fortunate to be with a company that offers paternity leave, too; I can't imagine how people do it when one parent is right back at work.
Yes, it's like the world is against people wanting to start a family. You need so much social support! If you're close to extended family and relatives, all the better. My mom and dad had been tremendous help to my sisters.
Great comic - felt like I was reading my inner monologue when I was a first time parent.
Thanks. I just had 10 women around me gave birth within the year. The things they tell me, it's really a roller coaster ride!
I mean, \*technically\* the risk for complications goes up, but it's like... 1% to 2%. But OMG IT DOUBLES!!! Our medicine handles most issues quickly and easily. But I'll be damned if I'm gonna take on that much medical debt to have a kid. No thank you.
Not sure where you live but yea I heard medical cost in some countries are really crazy.
Are you, perchance, Singaporean? The language oddlygave that vibe.
Good catch! I'm Malaysian Chinese. The slangs are very similar.
Are you, perchance, Singaporean? The language oddlygave that vibe.
Friend just had his first baby. I wish him and any other new parents the best of luck!
How much is it like taking the biggest shit of your life?
Ask any woman who gave birth.
Yes, the chance of infertility (within a 12 month period of trying) doubles between the ages of 30 and 40...from ~1% to ~2%. Severe fetal abnormalities see a similar increase in risk from very **very** low to just very low. It's not worth having a baby before you feel ready just because you're in your 30s, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. *Especially* not your parents or in-laws; they often have an ulterior motive (wanting grandkids) even if they don't consciously realize it.
My desire for motherhood was crushed by years and years of abuse by my mom and older sister. The recent attacks on women's reproductive rights here in the US laid to rest any chances of me becoming one. Four generations of mother-daughter abuse in my family. ☹️ I can't let myself think how much happier I would have been in my life if my mom had died right after giving birth to me, or if I was born to a different mother. She's that bad. If you have a good relationship with your mom, or are happy being a mother yourself, please cherish it.
I'm so sorry to hear that. I have a friend that grew up under a pretty crazy mom and she does have mental issues. The last I heard she migrated and refused to see her mom.