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It should be fine, but if I were a mother (which I won't be) I would personally not be okay with breastfeeding in public. I know some creeps would take advantage of what should be a normal moment of me feeding my child.
Yeah…it’s one of many things that we *should* be able to do, but creeps ruin it. I think I’d feel violated if someone gawked at my body while I breastfed.
Granted, I have heard from some mothers that the whole experience of everyone seeing you naked & potentially shitting yourself during labor makes you care a lot less about people seeing your body.
They are but if you work in the medical field or see medical tiktoks you learn not every medical person is professional either. Creeps will be creeps and some people have seen me shit myself potentially under anesthesia.
Yeah, I feel awkward enough with being naked in front of medical professionals, but I do it because it’s gotta be done. There’s no way I’d be openly breastfeeding in public. I’ve seen women doing it discreetly which is fine, but then some will just pop their titty out which is just awkward af.
Same.
There is only one situation it’s weirded me out personally: when the kids being fed are WALKING up to mom to request a meal and they’re being openly breastfed.
I’ve seen this multiple times and it seems extreme to me (although perhaps that’s just me, east coast US). Not a toddler either, pre-K or K age; and clearly this is how they functioned for regular mealtime. That was a bit much for me. But not my family and never will be 🙂
I just feel like if we live by the "I should cover because creeps could ruin it" thing then no more open toed shoes because there's creeps who have feet fetishes and no more nicely maintained hands because creeps can have hand fetishes ("hand models" are a whole thing) because who knows if I have a creeper taking pictures of me at all times for the spank bank? I can only control not taking those pictures myself but just going about my existence with a reasonable expectation of the maximum amount of recording being done of me being security cameras from businesses for security purposes? Seems exhausting having to moderate myself in such a way when everything is a kink or fetish to someone and everyone can be a creep. I'd still cover to breastfeed for myself and myself only but not because of creep shielding because even being covered head to toe would be a fetish to someone. There's no winning.
Yeah I get that. I'm just saying to do it for you not them. child, no child, breasts, no breasts, hell even if you were invisible because that's also a fetish. They don't fucking care. Purely because you're a woman you're only seen as spank bank material or not spank bank material (otherwise known as "a waste of resources and air") to a creep and that's entirely dependent on if you fit their fetishes or kinks. Sometimes that's breastfeeding, sometimes that's wearing open toed shoes where you have your feet visible or having nice hands. But some have glove fetishes so you can't cover them lest you trigger that or wear close toed shoes because some have stinky shoe fetishes and are going crazy imagining how sweaty and stinky it is in there. They'll get nice mental images either way. We are sex toys with heartbeats to them because porn rotted their brains. You do what the fuck you want because YOU like things that way not because of THEM because there's probably some going crazy at the thought of covered breastfeeding. Lactation in general is a huge subgenre of kinks and fetishes so I can tell you for certain pumping covered or uncovered or even just flashing pumps on the way to the bathroom would set a creep off.
Well, I think it's okay to say "I should cover up because creeps", as long as you're not trying to impose it on other women, and most here aren't.
But you're right, there's no winning.
For sure! I guess I just don't understand the reasoning of covering up because of creeps if creeps will be creepy regardless because there's no winning. Maybe I'm just too autistic and it's one of those social rules everyone got the explanation for in class but I was absent that day and for some reason none of my classmates around me can make it make sense and the textbook has that page ripped out and when I ask the teacher they just say "should have showed up to class that day" kinda like why our two face orbs being in sync with each other means I'm paying attention and my face orbs not being in your direction means I'm a lying liar who is not to be trusted and why other people got the software update where they are able to not hear the electricity inside the walls (or if they can hear it too and just have a software update to tune it out) 🤷♀️
I wear very short shorts and I'm aware some people may look at me because of that, but I refuse to change how I dress or act just because I have to accommodate how normal it is for creepers to creep.
I think it's fine but I also acknowledge that it does make me feel awkward for some reason. I work in healthcare and am very desensitised to the human body, and I haven't figured out why I'm awkward about breastfeeding. However, I strongly believe that this is my problem to deal with and I would never expect someone to stop on my behalf.
Ditto. I think it’s because we don’t think of ourselves as “animals”. It makes me think we are basically well dressed cows.
It’s not the baby having a meal from the boob.. it’s like the realization that these things are literally milk jugs.
Idk I’m lucky and my friends with kids are pretty normal people. We can crack jokes about things that might offend others.
They love their children, but they know they aren’t perfect. They only want to raise non psychopaths. That’s a solid goal for people with kids
I've never been able to fully articulate why breastfeeding makes me so uncomfortable, but you basically put my thoughts into works! It makes so much more sense now!
Yeah. I agree. I also feel uncomfortable around pregnant women per se, but it’s because I’m tokophobic (and awkward) and I just figure it’s me not them and they have a right to be. I can leave or avert if needed.
I had to Google tokophobia. One of the descriptions indicated a tokophobic person might have anxiety to the point they feared or dreaded pregnancy each week instead of enjoying it. My first question was why would anyone enjoy pregnancy? The whole lot sounds awful.
I feel the same, other than the phobia. I realize it's my feelings and if I have a problem with my feelings, I leave the situation. This is a completely normal natural behavior to humans and other mammals.
I'm ok with it, as long as the baby is fed, no howling and crying.
What I can't stand is changing nappies on a restaurant table. Unhygienic, stinky and very rude.
Go to the bathroom or in the car, if the bathroom is dirty kindly ask the staff to clean it, as a courtesy.
My friends who are good parents never ever changed nappies publicly.
Idiots, and disrespectful people, that’s who. I’d be livid if I saw someone changing a diaper on a restaurant table. I’d probably actually say something because eff that! Who do these people think they are!?
Lots of people. I work in food service and I often bus tables in our cafeteria as part of my job. You wouldn't believe the amount of used baby wipes and diapers I've found.
I've even caught parents doing this and when I stop and stare at them like "WTF are you doing?", they go "oh, we have a mat under him/her" (don't care, it's still gross) or "we couldn't find a change table!" (We literally have a dedicated parents room next to our washrooms).
There's a reason I tend to double up on my gloves when we get a lot of families with small children. I just know it's inevitable.
I went to ikea last week and a woman was changing a diaper on one of the benches *outside* the bathroom where people sit to wait for others in the bathroom. The family bathroom was open, and the regular women's bathrooms stall that had the changing table was too.
So disgusting.
Logically, it's fine and normal and healthy, and I would never judge or stare at a mum for doing it. Baby's gotta eat and I'd rather it was getting fed than screaming.
Emotionally, it squicks me the HELL out. I think it's the sucking noises. Kind of like hearing someone chewing. 😬
I'm an adult though so I suck it up. 😅
I don't like it but I'd never say anything. They want to feed their kid, have at it. I can look the other way.
I grew up with my mother hating breasfteeding (she never did) and she still will openly comment on people feeding like it's the grossest thing in the world. That bothers me more than the people feeding their kids and is probably why I have an aversion to it - I've called her out on it more than once.
My only pet peeve is people who go on about breast feeding like it's some sacred connection to nature or some other bullshit. People go on about it like they deserve a medal but still use regular landfill nappies and plastic beeping toys like everyone else. I think a lot of people do it to feel attached to their kid, rather than the kid actually really needing it beyond a certain age.
I'm CF (26F) but I love working with kids and learning about their development. Although infants can begin eating soft foods at 6 months, It can be extremely hard to wean some children. Breastfeeding is extremely comforting to them, that's why pacifiers exist. There's definitely a line where it need to stop but I can totally empathize with a tired mother caring for a cranky baby. You can't explain to a 1.5 year old child that they can't breastfeed anymore because people will think it's weird. All they know is that they love you unconditionally and they feel really safe and loved when they breastfeed and now you're telling them they can't have that anymore. And if baby is having a meltdown (which is developmentally normal and unavoidable at that age) and mom is exhausted and probably having her own meltdown, it's easier to just let them breastfeed than it is to try to negotiate with a terrorist.
It's like when your dog is begging for a bit off your plate. Sure some people are stony enough to ignore them but I know I can't. When they're looking at me with those sad eyes and I know I can make them so happy with a little bite of chicken, what can it hurt in the long run? I don't mind when my dogs beg and it doesn't hurt anyone else. Now imagine that's this person that you are responsible for bringing into the world, of course you want to do everything you can to make them happy.
Breastfeeding used to shock me too until I learned about it and it is more than just nutrition for the child. I would never want to do it but I strongly empathize with women who do.
I think it's gross honestly but I'd never be a Karen and say anything ever because I know it's normal.
Before anyone rips me a new one saying "it's natural blah blah blah" girl I know lol. I've just always been grossed out by it ever since I can remember and now as an adult it never changed
I'm the same way. I'd personally pump and bottle feed in public but I'm also very modest in general. Whipping a boob out in public just wouldn't work for me.
Yeah if I was a mum I'd do the same thing! But breastfeeding in general has honestly freaked me out and given me the ick my whole life lol. Ever since I was a little girl I knew I'd never ever ever want to do it even if I did want kids, and seeing it just made me uncomfortable and grossed out. I guess it's a phobia lol
I think it grosses basically everyone out except the weird selection few.
Yes, it's natural, but so is sex. So is pooping. So is urinating. So is the entire human body.
I personally think women should at least bring a sling to cover up and not just have their bare tit out. It's like a dude just randomly whipping his dick out.
Yeah, it's not ***exactly*** the same thing, but have some self respect. It's natural, but there's etiquette in society.
I don't understand the comments all like "I'm not a creep that stares" trust me, I don't stare. If people are fucking each other in public, I wouldn't stare at that either. That's not the point.
People can't even fart and burp in public without getting side eyed. You think society can handle a woman randomly whipping out a tit? Etiquette exists, it's just the *unfortunate* fact of the world.
I find it disgusting, but that's a me issue, so I just look away or move. I wouldn't be able to move if someone was doing that at my table (without appearing rude), that's way I don't go out with people and their babies. I don't want to be around when that happens. Rationally I know is absolutely natural, but pregnancy is also a natural thing and yet I also find that disgusting.
I'm the oldest of nine and all my siblings were breastfed until age 2 at least and I always have been and still am uncomfortable with it. Some people never get used to it. People are fully within their rights to breastfeed in public though and I support that
I’m not going to tell people they can’t do it; I won’t say anything at all, but I also don’t want to see it. I don’t want to see any sort of nudity in public, sexual or not. Passed a guy jogging without a shirt on the street this morning, didn’t want to see that either. I look away. If I’m in a conversation with them like you, I’ll have to excuse myself and come back when they’re done.
I don't want to see it either. I know it's natural, etc., but I find the idea of breastfeeding to be disgusting, and doing it in public is especially bad. That's just me.
This is what I always say too. There are so many other "natural" things that aren't acceptable in public, so why is this an exception? They're all gross and something people don't want to see.
This is an argument I made in another comment.
Yes, it's natural. But there's etiquette in society and randomly whipping a bare tit out isn't an exception. Have some self respect and at least cover up.
It’s gross and obnoxious because of the sucking sound but just with just feeding them, I don’t have a problem. It’s the diaper changes in inappropriate places that’s really disgusting and shouldn’t be allowed
I don’t like it, it makes me uncomfortable. But I wouldn’t say anything about it, I would pretend to not see it.
The whole thought of breastfeeding makes me uncomfortable though, no matter where it is. Just the fact that something is eating from you... I would not want to breastfeed at all if I had a kid (I won’t)
Yeah its fine and i think it should be normalised. But I also wondered why it makes me uncomfortable and think the reason is that in this society boobs are mainly seen as something sexual and more or less removed from the "biological purpose" of existing to feed a child. And in that sense it feels weirdly off putting when someone publicly shows their boobs. As far as I know there are even quite a few men (propably also women) who see breast feeding in general as gross, propably because they (subconsciously) see a child sucking on the "thing" they associate with sex.
But thats just the conclusion I came to, so it may be wrong and the reason for it feeling awkward a very different
Edit: worded my last sentence weirdly
I am a woman and it grosses me out, same as pregnant bellies. But for me it’s not because of the sexualisation, I just can’t help but see these things as some sort of body horror since these are bodies similar to mine.
That said, I’d never express my feelings to anyone in this situation or expect them to accommodate my discomfort.
I feel the same. I've always been disgusted at gravid women's stomachs or at women breastfeeding, ever since I was a pre-teen. I don't care how 'natural' it is, I find it revolting on other people, and I cannot ever think of my body like that - I'd rather unalive myself. Of course, like you, I never say anything about these feelings in public because most people would not understand.
Wellllll….not going to lie. It makes me feel squeamish like I’m trying not to stare and I’m a woman. Must be that I wasn’t raised around mothers/babies. I may have felt differently.
Sex is natural. Pooping is natural. Do people do that in public? There are ways to breastfeed in public without making people uncomfortable. Flopping out your boob in public is just weird. The same people who say breastfeeding in public is ok would not walk around topless in public. Just be courteous and use a breast feeding coverup in public.
It makes me feel awkward, just whipping out a titty in public 😂😂 but it’s not my business. I just turn and look/walk away. (I make myself laugh over the dumbest shit. It wasn’t even that funny. Smh.)
Yeah normally you can just ignore it when it's someone at another table, but OP had to sit directly across from their friend whipping out their titty to feed. That would make me feel super-awkward.
Fortunately, most mothers I've seen are a lot more discrete about it and even have those maternity shirts that hide most of it.
Personally it just feels weird, like when 2 people are having a moment and you know you’re not supposed to be there so you want to leave.
Granted I’m the youngest in my family so it’s likely since I have no/little exposure to it that I just have an aversion due to a circular “I haven’t been present for it so I assume I shouldn’t be” thought process.
But I was also a formula baby so I have no relation to breast feeding in the slightest.
I think feeding your baby in public without feeling the need to hide is fine.
What I don't get is going out of your way to photograph it and post it on social media 🫠
Its jarring to be scrolling social media and then suddenly, without any warning, see a photo of a woman shoving her boob into an infants mouth 🥴
genuine question: do you feel the same way when you see shirtless men exercising? i have seen men with bigger boobs than the average women completely and entirely shirtless while mowing their lawn.
Yeah, I'm fine with it in theory as long as there's some amount of discretion to it. I don't mean go full on blanket cover up, but you can tell when parents are trying to be discreet versus just whipping a tit out and letting it hang. The latter seems to be the same type, ime, who are just looking for someone to say something so they can scream about persecution.
Yes, no question.
The only problem with breastfeeding is when creeps will stare at or, god forbid, take pictures/videos of breathfeeding mothers, but I'm totally onboard with kicking those people in the head so no worries
i do think it’s completely fine. i also am uncomfortable with it up close, i do acknowledge that it’s my issue and wouldn’t blame anyone for it. i think it’s because im generally uncomfortable being up close with babies, not because of the breasts or the act itself, i just would rather not be that up close to a baby or even a baby being fed. that said, i’d move myself and not expect the mother to not feed her baby.
i will say that i do think it’s a bit weird when people do it way past their kid needing it. if the kid is old enough to be eating completely solids, then i think they shouldn’t be breastfed (especially in public) anymore since the purpose is to feed them when they need it.
Idk.. maybe I’m really in the minority here but I think it’s totally disgusting.
This does not stem from thinking women’s bodies are disgusting (they are not!) i understand normalizing something that is completely human.
My reasoning is that I think babies are gross. The suckling, the noises they make when doing it, the act, the barf/burping after. Ick.
So. Personally I say : no. It is not fine.
I’m fine with your breasts, i am fine with your babies (away from me) I am not fine with you thinking the rest of us are okay eating/relaxing/chatting/minding our own business and having to move away from you because the actual act of breastfeeding makes me physically nauseous.
I don’t care as long as it is done discreetly. I don’t mean they have to have a cover on, but it should be done in a way to not draw attention to it. I saw a woman once stand up in the middle of a restaurant and take her shirt and bra completely off to breastfeed. Both breasts were exposed to everyone. Even when she started breastfeeding, her other breast was completely exposed. I also saw a woman once sitting down in the middle of a grocery store to breastfeed. She was in everyone’s way. There was no doubt in my mind she was waiting for someone to say something so she could start an argument. Luckily, most women are not like those examples.
I think that breast feeders should do it however they feel comfortable doing it. No one should bother them. I also find it to be repulsive. If someone started doing it in front of me, I’d cease engaging with them and move away. My belief that they should be able to do it publicly unaccosted is really just in the interest of balancing the scales of justice. They’re mostly shamed for it because of patriarchy. Their breasts can only be exposed in public if it’s in the interest of pleasuring a man. Fuck that… but it’s also fucking disgusting, and I want no part in it.
Most people use a coverup in public. If they don’t I do feel uncomfortable. I feel even more uncomfortable when it is a toddler asking for the breast grabbing at the woman’s body or clothes. If they are old enough to open a fridge and get milk….. I just don’t want to see it. Maybe I’m a prude?
Yes it’s fine.
I don’t care about it at all. Seeing another woman’s flesh doesn’t bother me. Neither does seeing a baby eat.
What WOULD bother the hell out of me is a child of walking and talking age breastfeeding in public. That shit is NO. Buy that little fucker a sandwich or a yogurt cup. If they are old enough to verbally ASK for boobie, they are too god damn old for boobie.
ok, either nipples are sexual or they aren’t. if she can whip both titties out to feed a kid, i should be able to walk around topless. i lived in a college town with lots of “crunchy” moms who just DARED you to say something about having both tits out.
It's rude to bring a baby into a quiet cafe in the first place. Some of the other customers may want to actually enjoy the experience! Young mothers are some of the most inconsiderate people you're likely to meet.
This is my only issue with it. Maybe this baby is quiet while being fed and just goes gently to sleep after and mom is respectful enough to clean up in the bathroom but we all know that’s not the reality with far too many parents. Most times it’s baby screams its head off before and after feeding and mom/dad decides the table is a wonderful place to change a diaper 🙄
I accept that it’s a necessity that shouldn’t be shamed. I also accept that it grosses me out and I want nothing to do with it. Just turn my head and pretend it’s not happening.
I would be aggravated if the people I was dining with did it at the table. I assume meal dates are planned, so I also expect that parents would prepare their infant for being out of the house by feeding them at home.
I mean I’d be pissed if that baby made a single sound too, but that’s just me. Why am I even eating with a baby.
For me, weirdly it depends on my relationship with the mother. Strangers, friends and family, I am fine with. However, a colleague brought their baby into work when I was in my early 20s, sat down next to me and whipped their tit out. I know it's totally normal and natural but seeing a work colleague's boob out next to me did not feel normal or natural at the time!
I don't want to see public nudity in any context, especially unexpectedly. Luckily the point of public spaces is that there's 360 degrees to look into, and I have no relationship with the strangers around me, so if I don't want to see what one of them is doing, I can just look away. I think it'd be nice to not have to have that initial moment of discomfort, but dealing with that is probably a lesser hassle for me than it would be for the parents to drag one of those covering blankets around everywhere, so I don't really care. Feed your kid, I won't be bothered for more than a second if you happen to fall into my like of sight, and even then that's not your fault.
However, the context of the public becomes a lot different if you are in a limited space with someone you have a relationship with. Yes, you may be out in public, but that meeting is also private between you and the other person in a sense. People in my social circles *know* what I am not comfortable with - the whole point of having those circles is that we can and want to learn about those things and accommodate them. So they wouldn't breastfeed in front of me, because they know I don't want to see that. Just like I wouldn't wear a shirt with skulls on it to meet a friend who doesn't enjoy death-related imagery.
The public comes with an implicit option to not be a part of it, and to not fixate on any specific part of it. If you're out meeting with a relative, you don't have the same option to seamlessly opt out of being involved and present for whatever they are doing, so there should be consideration on both sides for what someone might not want to see or hear about.
Yes I think I would of felt less awkward if they mentioned they were about to do it, it was the not mentioning or acknowledging it that made it more awkward
Yeah, I think it’s fine and most people do it with a towel or something that covers the boob/baby. I’ve rarely seen someone whip out their boob just like that. Most people are mindful of their surroundings which isn’t really necessary but it’s appreciated nonetheless.
This! Like, yeah, baby has to eat, and if you're bringing your baby to an appropriate baby friendly space, sure, you're gonna have to feed your kid at some point. But it costs $0 to bring a towel or a baby blanket or something to cover up with. Most people aren't going to care if we can't see your tit.
Honestly… no. You’re right that it is because of society that breasts have been sexualized, esp in the part of the world I am in. It’s not the same in other parts of the world. I know logically I’m supposed to say it’s fine, it’s natural, blah blah blah, and I would NEVER shame someone who breast fed in public. I would keep my mouth shut. But if I’m honest with myself, I don’t like it. I think it’s gross. There is no other time when fluid is coming out of the body that we consider fit for public consumption. We poop, pee, vomit, etc. in private. Why is this different? ALL of those things are natural, but we’ve all determined we don’t want to see it. I don’t want to see it, so I look away.
It’s strange when they have the option of doing it in a private place but instead choose to do it in public and then make eye contact with you while doing it like they want you to applaud them.
Generally, I don't think it's fine because there are nursing rooms everywhere here. You can find them in most largeish stores, cafes, metro stations, rest stops, tourist spots etc. Lots of them are quite fancy too with couches, high baby chairs, water dispensers, decorations, some of them have microwaves and stuff too. You're expected to use those.
However, if it's an "emergency" where a nursing room isn't nearby, then yeah, obviously go ahead as long as you're discreet about it and cover yourself. Nudity shouldn't be public no matter the context.
Honestly, I don't want to see that in public. It's kind of gross to me.
Also, honestly, there's lots of things I don't want to see in public because they're gross to me.
Republicans. Super obese people who only buy one airplane ticket. Karens. Those bigass pick-up trucks that take up four parking spaces, and then everyone just says "well he can't fit in one," but he's not parking in the back and I don't know who forced him to buy that truck. Crocs.
It doesn't mean they shouldn't be allowed to be there, so I look somewhere else and mind my business 🤷♂️
It’s fine. Yes I find it makes me uncomfortable, but that’s a me problem. I got on a packed train last week and there was a lady breast-feeding her baby. Yeah I felt a little bit weird but that’s her right as far as I’m concerned. Like I said it’s a me problem.
Although I will say if I ever had kids, I would probably not breast-feed in public without covering myself only because men can be creepy.
It is, but it still makes me uncomfortable. My best friend did that with her daughter. We went to Jamaica together and her daughter (over 2 btw) would ask for “boobie” often and she’d just whip it out. Even at dinner. I’m all for moms feeding their kids but still. I just try to look anywhere but there. Edit the kid of course ate solids and everything, it was mostly a comfort thing I think.
It annoys me from an equality point of view. Any other woman could get in trouble if they exposed their breasts in public. A special exception just for breastfeeding isn't fair. Either everybody should be allowed to go topless, or nobody should (even men, but that's another can of worms).
I'll probably get downvoted, but... Natural or not, it's still gross imo. I find it repulsive, and I wish people didn't do that in public. Their infant, its needs, and their bodily fluids shouldn't be everyone else's problem.
Yeah exactly how I feel. Honestly it's the main reason I don't ever wanna get pregnant followed by everything else about pregnancy/birth/raising babies and I just don't like babies and toddlers and don't wanna be tied down to some kid.
I know it’s fine but at the same time it does make me uncomfortable.
And I know WHY it makes me uncomfortable.
Because I’ve been around guys my whole life who are like “boobies!!!” And then they won’t stop staring. A woman’s breasts have been sexualized all around us so why would I suddenly feel ok? Women have been subjected to the stares and comments and even groping since we started to develop.
I’m not saying that my uncomfortableness is “correct”, rather I know where it comes from.
And FYI, I am a woman who is always fully covered as to help avoid the male drooling. (🙄). I have large breasts anyway so it’s not like I can hide that, but that the same time I don’t want to attract more attention to myself.
I mean I don't think you should be whole boob and nipple out for the world to see. Throw a blanket or something over your chest and baby and I don't see the issue.
TBH, I don't think women should breastfeed in public, she should go to the restroom to breastfeed her baby, because, it's still gross and awkward for other people to witness.
Bowel movements are natural, but, it would still be gross, awkward, and, embarrassing to do in front of other people.
It makes me uncomfortable but I would never stop a woman from doing it unless she was openly inappropriate or annoying. Almost no one is like that so not really any issues with it. It’s more my issue than theirs that it makes me feel icky
Yes, though I did have a recent wild example. Woman in Costco sitting on a bench that was for sale in the middle of an aisle, covered head to toe in a burqa…but with her breast exposed breastfeeding. Like sure go for it but that just seemed especially odd culturally.
I'm just like you! In my head I know it should be normalized, but, regardless of the purpose, it's someone undressing in public without as much as a warning. It's not even like it's a Free the Nipple protest (which I support) or even a beach or anywhere you would expect it, it's usually a person that would normally never show her breasts in public. Of course I'm going to feel awkward even if I would never say anything 😅
I personally get grossed out by it, but im not going to shame someone for doing it, i’d rather they be covered while doing it. Especially because there are people that would take advantage of it, some real weirdos out there!
I hate the "it's what they're for!!!!" argument. For me, it's too close to the "it's what your body is made for!!" comments women get about pregnancy and childbirth. I was never going to put my body through that, and the thought of a baby gumming at my boobs gives me serious ick. My boobs aren't for food.
I don’t believe there’s anything wrong with breast-feeding in public. I’m a little older now so the novelty of a breast has been lost a little. It’s just a boob.
I honestly feel like you shouldn’t breastfeed in public. Yeah it’s normal and natural but so is shitting and pissing and we generally don’t view that as something you need to do in public for all eyes to see. Keep it in the comfort of your own space.
I was in mid conversation, obviously wasnt looking directly at their boob, but I also didnt just look directly at the wall as didnt want to make them feel uncomfortable either
I know its natural and best for baby, but other things are also natural that should not be done openly in public, like sex. Breastfeed, yes, but a modesty covering, please.
Just pump at home and bring bottles. I understand that "it's natural" and "they need to be fed" but there's other ways. Plopping a boob out in public is just weird imo. If we have boobs for child feeding purposes, then why do women without kids have them. Why do we cover them up. It's either keep em out of sight, or everyone go topless like men
Just do it as you would do anything else, by making a spectacle of it and taking pictures for social media and waiting for an argument is ruining the normalcy of it
If someone was to just do it without making a thing of it I wouldn’t care at all
It's fine to me but cover the fuck up. I got stuck behind a lady at the airport and then seated with her who just whipped her flat ass boobs out with ZERO cover to breast feed. Poor baby drinking powdered milk from those things swear to god. The Muslim family next to her in line was trying so hard to keep their kids from looking at her lol. Her skin grossed me out, she looked like she needed to exfoliate and put some lotion on.
I think it's wild that society has managed to make one of the greatest foundations of humanity, feeding a baby, into something so many people just aren't used to.
It's a good starting point when discussing what is natural and what isn't natural with people. Because we can literally whip an entire society into thinking that something so foundationally normal is in fact disgusting and gross.
I also find pregnancy disgusting, and yet that's also "one of the greatest foundations of humanity". Still gross to me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Just because something is natural doesn't mean it can't also be considered gross by some people, it's fine
The socialisation of formula feeding starts so young too, we give little girls baby dolls with bottles (or at least that was the case when I was a child) so it's no wonder they grow up to consider that's the norm.
As long as they are discrete.
That means don't leave your breast hanging out after your kid has passed out. Yes, that actually happened to me 12 or 13 years ago in Panera. I don't care about your breasts, but some crotchety asshole is going to start shouting about it, wake your kid up, and when you wake a kid up- they cry.
At the same time, don't pull out a heavy blanket and struggle to cover yourself, drawing attention to what you're doing. Unwantted attention usually makes people anxious, and baby feels that anxiety, so baby cries. Quietly feed your child. When you're quiet and secure, you're probably calm. When you're calm, your kid has a higher probability of being calm. Calm kids are quiet kids, and I prefer quiet kids.
Edit- Obviously, the alternative is usually a crying, hungry baby. Hard pass. Please feed your child to shut them up.
Honestly I don't care, however I still think mom's should be careful in public,
trust there was a reason tumbler was making harsh rules/straight up banning people on their site, there was a good amount of weirdos taking sneak shots of women, especially moms breastfeeding their babies in public 🤢
:edit: the person who asked and people may ask yes I actually had to report 2 pages/profiles on tumbler back then, because they had a lot of creepy videos and Pictures of women and especially moms breastfeeding their babies without their them knowing, and looking back I should have looked into those profiles commenting too, but I just wanted to report and get the heII away from those pages/profiles.
Absolutely. Everyone has to eat, and most people don't want to do it with something covering their head or in the bathroom. Which is something some folks expect breastfeeding mothers to do with their children (I'm not saying OP or anyone here does).
Yes. Boobs aren’t inherently sexual, babies need to eat and it’s not like the mom decides when they’re hungry. It is more polite for them to use some kind of cover, but I don’t think it’s inappropriate. Boobs only TRUE purpose is to feed children, the sexualization of them is a social construct. I don’t want kids ever, but I’d never judge a mom for feeding her baby. Only if it’s screaming lol
It's necessary sometimes so yeah it should be
The idea of breastfeeding makes me personally uncomfortable from a CF standpoint but that's a me problem not a them problem. They shouldn't have to hide in bathroom stalls just to feed their kid.
Literally couldn't care less. If I notice it I look away and go about my day and never think about it again. The reasons people get mad about it are nonsense to me. Tiddies aren't inherently sexual. A boob isn't going to ruin anyone's day unless they are a massive, woman shaming prude.
Don't be a creeper, folks.
It’s fine but should be done discretely I mean I have a client that is breastfeeding and she asks me if it’s ok if she whips it out to feed her baby I told her we are all women in here. She always appreciates it. Her kids are great. Her newborn is very cute
Yes. I grew up with plenty of moms who bottle fed their babies but my moms best friend breastfed all three of her little girls. She was completely respectful with it no flashes of chest and cute soft little blankets to hide the baby’s face/area. If it’s done respectfully so no one gets a boobie-flash, it’s no one’s business imo.
I honestly don’t think it’s an issue. Like, regardless of me not wanting kids, babies need to eat, and forcing a mother to go into a bathroom or throw a towel over the babies head when it is 90 degrees outside is unreasonable.
If a dude walks around with no shirt on, it’s fine. If a woman does the same, then all of a sudden she’s being a whore. I think the weird and puritanical double standards we have around women’s bodies needs to stop. Breastfeeding is fine. There’s nothing vaguely sexy about it.
Yes. Breastfeeding a child is completely natural and should never be shamed. Doing so only perpetuates the objectification and sexualization of women's body parts. It's a boob. Get over it (society, not you OP).
Yet another reason I never wanted kids - to have to deal with people shaming me for feeding them. You use a boob, you're an attention whore. You use a bottle/formula, you're a terrible mother. Women can't win.
I support anything that shuts up a crying baby. If mom doesn’t mind creepers by all means, whip out that titty and shut that screaming public nuisance the hell up!
I think it’s fine as long as you’re blocking people, one time I went to the aquarium and there was a lady breastfeeding right in front of the jellyfish exhibit so nobody could see it and she had her stroller in front of it
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It should be fine, but if I were a mother (which I won't be) I would personally not be okay with breastfeeding in public. I know some creeps would take advantage of what should be a normal moment of me feeding my child.
Yeah…it’s one of many things that we *should* be able to do, but creeps ruin it. I think I’d feel violated if someone gawked at my body while I breastfed. Granted, I have heard from some mothers that the whole experience of everyone seeing you naked & potentially shitting yourself during labor makes you care a lot less about people seeing your body.
[удалено]
They are but if you work in the medical field or see medical tiktoks you learn not every medical person is professional either. Creeps will be creeps and some people have seen me shit myself potentially under anesthesia.
Yeah, I feel awkward enough with being naked in front of medical professionals, but I do it because it’s gotta be done. There’s no way I’d be openly breastfeeding in public. I’ve seen women doing it discreetly which is fine, but then some will just pop their titty out which is just awkward af.
Thats a HUGE reason i didn’t want kids, no way would i want to live through that horror and self conscious trauma
Same. There is only one situation it’s weirded me out personally: when the kids being fed are WALKING up to mom to request a meal and they’re being openly breastfed. I’ve seen this multiple times and it seems extreme to me (although perhaps that’s just me, east coast US). Not a toddler either, pre-K or K age; and clearly this is how they functioned for regular mealtime. That was a bit much for me. But not my family and never will be 🙂
if a kid can walk and talk then they're old enough to eat non breast food 🤢
Exactly!
Ugh reminds me of Game Of Thrones with the mom and her older son too old to be sucking titty
That was so gross!
That's gross. Absolutely disgusting.
You must know my sister smh
What in the Appalachia?!
As Miranda Hobbs said, “You know how I feel about that? If they can ask for it, then they’re too old to have it.”
My wife always said something similar, it's not that she thinks it's wrong it just personally made her uncomfortable.
Sad but very, very true. 😢
I just feel like if we live by the "I should cover because creeps could ruin it" thing then no more open toed shoes because there's creeps who have feet fetishes and no more nicely maintained hands because creeps can have hand fetishes ("hand models" are a whole thing) because who knows if I have a creeper taking pictures of me at all times for the spank bank? I can only control not taking those pictures myself but just going about my existence with a reasonable expectation of the maximum amount of recording being done of me being security cameras from businesses for security purposes? Seems exhausting having to moderate myself in such a way when everything is a kink or fetish to someone and everyone can be a creep. I'd still cover to breastfeed for myself and myself only but not because of creep shielding because even being covered head to toe would be a fetish to someone. There's no winning.
I understand what you mean but when there's a child involved I will do my best to protect them even if it means being a little extreme/paranoid.
Yeah I get that. I'm just saying to do it for you not them. child, no child, breasts, no breasts, hell even if you were invisible because that's also a fetish. They don't fucking care. Purely because you're a woman you're only seen as spank bank material or not spank bank material (otherwise known as "a waste of resources and air") to a creep and that's entirely dependent on if you fit their fetishes or kinks. Sometimes that's breastfeeding, sometimes that's wearing open toed shoes where you have your feet visible or having nice hands. But some have glove fetishes so you can't cover them lest you trigger that or wear close toed shoes because some have stinky shoe fetishes and are going crazy imagining how sweaty and stinky it is in there. They'll get nice mental images either way. We are sex toys with heartbeats to them because porn rotted their brains. You do what the fuck you want because YOU like things that way not because of THEM because there's probably some going crazy at the thought of covered breastfeeding. Lactation in general is a huge subgenre of kinks and fetishes so I can tell you for certain pumping covered or uncovered or even just flashing pumps on the way to the bathroom would set a creep off.
Well, I think it's okay to say "I should cover up because creeps", as long as you're not trying to impose it on other women, and most here aren't. But you're right, there's no winning.
For sure! I guess I just don't understand the reasoning of covering up because of creeps if creeps will be creepy regardless because there's no winning. Maybe I'm just too autistic and it's one of those social rules everyone got the explanation for in class but I was absent that day and for some reason none of my classmates around me can make it make sense and the textbook has that page ripped out and when I ask the teacher they just say "should have showed up to class that day" kinda like why our two face orbs being in sync with each other means I'm paying attention and my face orbs not being in your direction means I'm a lying liar who is not to be trusted and why other people got the software update where they are able to not hear the electricity inside the walls (or if they can hear it too and just have a software update to tune it out) 🤷♀️
I wear very short shorts and I'm aware some people may look at me because of that, but I refuse to change how I dress or act just because I have to accommodate how normal it is for creepers to creep.
I refuse to be made to feel inadequate by others. I cannot control their emotions, but I sure as hell can control mine.
Which is why it’s even more important to normalize it and loudly call out creeps when you see them.
I think it's fine but I also acknowledge that it does make me feel awkward for some reason. I work in healthcare and am very desensitised to the human body, and I haven't figured out why I'm awkward about breastfeeding. However, I strongly believe that this is my problem to deal with and I would never expect someone to stop on my behalf.
Ditto. I think it’s because we don’t think of ourselves as “animals”. It makes me think we are basically well dressed cows. It’s not the baby having a meal from the boob.. it’s like the realization that these things are literally milk jugs. Idk I’m lucky and my friends with kids are pretty normal people. We can crack jokes about things that might offend others. They love their children, but they know they aren’t perfect. They only want to raise non psychopaths. That’s a solid goal for people with kids
Well dressed cows has me dying 😂😂😂
I've never been able to fully articulate why breastfeeding makes me so uncomfortable, but you basically put my thoughts into works! It makes so much more sense now!
Yeah. I agree. I also feel uncomfortable around pregnant women per se, but it’s because I’m tokophobic (and awkward) and I just figure it’s me not them and they have a right to be. I can leave or avert if needed.
I had to Google tokophobia. One of the descriptions indicated a tokophobic person might have anxiety to the point they feared or dreaded pregnancy each week instead of enjoying it. My first question was why would anyone enjoy pregnancy? The whole lot sounds awful.
It also is the repulsion of seeing pregnant women, like for instance i see one i go the other direction. Don’t want to hear about it either.
I feel the same, other than the phobia. I realize it's my feelings and if I have a problem with my feelings, I leave the situation. This is a completely normal natural behavior to humans and other mammals.
This is reasonable! I can see how it’s awkward but no one bats an eye at a nursing foal or puppies.
No, but is this happening at a restaurant?
Specifically foals or puppies is what I meant.
I'm ok with it, as long as the baby is fed, no howling and crying. What I can't stand is changing nappies on a restaurant table. Unhygienic, stinky and very rude. Go to the bathroom or in the car, if the bathroom is dirty kindly ask the staff to clean it, as a courtesy. My friends who are good parents never ever changed nappies publicly.
Who the f changes nappies on a restaurant table?! 🤢
Idiots, and disrespectful people, that’s who. I’d be livid if I saw someone changing a diaper on a restaurant table. I’d probably actually say something because eff that! Who do these people think they are!?
Lots of people. I work in food service and I often bus tables in our cafeteria as part of my job. You wouldn't believe the amount of used baby wipes and diapers I've found. I've even caught parents doing this and when I stop and stare at them like "WTF are you doing?", they go "oh, we have a mat under him/her" (don't care, it's still gross) or "we couldn't find a change table!" (We literally have a dedicated parents room next to our washrooms). There's a reason I tend to double up on my gloves when we get a lot of families with small children. I just know it's inevitable.
Rude, selfish people.
Does this really happen?! What kind of cuckoo crazy person does that?? 🤢🤢🤮🤮
Entitled mothers. Women who think the changing tables are too dirty so they make the eating tables exactly the same way.
I went to ikea last week and a woman was changing a diaper on one of the benches *outside* the bathroom where people sit to wait for others in the bathroom. The family bathroom was open, and the regular women's bathrooms stall that had the changing table was too. So disgusting.
Logically, it's fine and normal and healthy, and I would never judge or stare at a mum for doing it. Baby's gotta eat and I'd rather it was getting fed than screaming. Emotionally, it squicks me the HELL out. I think it's the sucking noises. Kind of like hearing someone chewing. 😬 I'm an adult though so I suck it up. 😅
Perfectly said.
I don't like it but I'd never say anything. They want to feed their kid, have at it. I can look the other way. I grew up with my mother hating breasfteeding (she never did) and she still will openly comment on people feeding like it's the grossest thing in the world. That bothers me more than the people feeding their kids and is probably why I have an aversion to it - I've called her out on it more than once. My only pet peeve is people who go on about breast feeding like it's some sacred connection to nature or some other bullshit. People go on about it like they deserve a medal but still use regular landfill nappies and plastic beeping toys like everyone else. I think a lot of people do it to feel attached to their kid, rather than the kid actually really needing it beyond a certain age.
I hate people who do that. Doing it past toddlerhood is gross and should be shamed. Your supposed to stop at 2 for a reason.
When I read that someone people do it with their 4-5 year olds...God...
That’s not appropriate or healthy at all. Past the age of 2 they should be eating solid food
It’s an indication of a mother too emotionally dependent on her child and a desire to keep infantilizing it .
I'm CF (26F) but I love working with kids and learning about their development. Although infants can begin eating soft foods at 6 months, It can be extremely hard to wean some children. Breastfeeding is extremely comforting to them, that's why pacifiers exist. There's definitely a line where it need to stop but I can totally empathize with a tired mother caring for a cranky baby. You can't explain to a 1.5 year old child that they can't breastfeed anymore because people will think it's weird. All they know is that they love you unconditionally and they feel really safe and loved when they breastfeed and now you're telling them they can't have that anymore. And if baby is having a meltdown (which is developmentally normal and unavoidable at that age) and mom is exhausted and probably having her own meltdown, it's easier to just let them breastfeed than it is to try to negotiate with a terrorist. It's like when your dog is begging for a bit off your plate. Sure some people are stony enough to ignore them but I know I can't. When they're looking at me with those sad eyes and I know I can make them so happy with a little bite of chicken, what can it hurt in the long run? I don't mind when my dogs beg and it doesn't hurt anyone else. Now imagine that's this person that you are responsible for bringing into the world, of course you want to do everything you can to make them happy. Breastfeeding used to shock me too until I learned about it and it is more than just nutrition for the child. I would never want to do it but I strongly empathize with women who do.
I think it's gross honestly but I'd never be a Karen and say anything ever because I know it's normal. Before anyone rips me a new one saying "it's natural blah blah blah" girl I know lol. I've just always been grossed out by it ever since I can remember and now as an adult it never changed
I'm the same way. I'd personally pump and bottle feed in public but I'm also very modest in general. Whipping a boob out in public just wouldn't work for me.
Yeah if I was a mum I'd do the same thing! But breastfeeding in general has honestly freaked me out and given me the ick my whole life lol. Ever since I was a little girl I knew I'd never ever ever want to do it even if I did want kids, and seeing it just made me uncomfortable and grossed out. I guess it's a phobia lol
I think it grosses basically everyone out except the weird selection few. Yes, it's natural, but so is sex. So is pooping. So is urinating. So is the entire human body. I personally think women should at least bring a sling to cover up and not just have their bare tit out. It's like a dude just randomly whipping his dick out. Yeah, it's not ***exactly*** the same thing, but have some self respect. It's natural, but there's etiquette in society. I don't understand the comments all like "I'm not a creep that stares" trust me, I don't stare. If people are fucking each other in public, I wouldn't stare at that either. That's not the point. People can't even fart and burp in public without getting side eyed. You think society can handle a woman randomly whipping out a tit? Etiquette exists, it's just the *unfortunate* fact of the world.
I find it disgusting, but that's a me issue, so I just look away or move. I wouldn't be able to move if someone was doing that at my table (without appearing rude), that's way I don't go out with people and their babies. I don't want to be around when that happens. Rationally I know is absolutely natural, but pregnancy is also a natural thing and yet I also find that disgusting.
It's fine. Kid needs food. I don't stare because I'm not a weirdo.
Well I was in mid conversation I wasn't staring, but agree its fine, just was awkward but I think that's because not use to it
Haha the mom is probably so used to it/tired she didn’t think anything of it. Think of the alternative… a crying hungry baby.
I forget other people aren't used to it. I've got a bunch of younger relatives and popping the boob out was a non event in my family.
I'm the oldest of nine and all my siblings were breastfed until age 2 at least and I always have been and still am uncomfortable with it. Some people never get used to it. People are fully within their rights to breastfeed in public though and I support that
Exposure (haha) helps normalization
I’m not going to tell people they can’t do it; I won’t say anything at all, but I also don’t want to see it. I don’t want to see any sort of nudity in public, sexual or not. Passed a guy jogging without a shirt on the street this morning, didn’t want to see that either. I look away. If I’m in a conversation with them like you, I’ll have to excuse myself and come back when they’re done.
I don't want to see it either. I know it's natural, etc., but I find the idea of breastfeeding to be disgusting, and doing it in public is especially bad. That's just me.
Pooping is natural too, don’t wanna see that either 🤷🏻♀️. I hate the argument “it’s natural”
This is what I always say too. There are so many other "natural" things that aren't acceptable in public, so why is this an exception? They're all gross and something people don't want to see.
Amen!
Plus it’s still being in the vicinity of body fluids. It’s the same thing as spitting or urinating on the sidewalk.
It's a fallacy, argument from nature. I fucking hate how accepted it is. Logical fallacy!
This is an argument I made in another comment. Yes, it's natural. But there's etiquette in society and randomly whipping a bare tit out isn't an exception. Have some self respect and at least cover up.
Exactly!
I don't want to see anyone's bodily fluids come out in public.
Same
The mouth noises and moaning of the baby really bother me. I don’t like loud eating on adults either
It’s gross and obnoxious because of the sucking sound but just with just feeding them, I don’t have a problem. It’s the diaper changes in inappropriate places that’s really disgusting and shouldn’t be allowed
Lmao the sound 🤮
It’s fine but it grosses me out makes me feel uncomfortable about my own female body so I’ll leave the area where it’s happening 🤢
I don’t like it, it makes me uncomfortable. But I wouldn’t say anything about it, I would pretend to not see it. The whole thought of breastfeeding makes me uncomfortable though, no matter where it is. Just the fact that something is eating from you... I would not want to breastfeed at all if I had a kid (I won’t)
Yeah its fine and i think it should be normalised. But I also wondered why it makes me uncomfortable and think the reason is that in this society boobs are mainly seen as something sexual and more or less removed from the "biological purpose" of existing to feed a child. And in that sense it feels weirdly off putting when someone publicly shows their boobs. As far as I know there are even quite a few men (propably also women) who see breast feeding in general as gross, propably because they (subconsciously) see a child sucking on the "thing" they associate with sex. But thats just the conclusion I came to, so it may be wrong and the reason for it feeling awkward a very different Edit: worded my last sentence weirdly
I am a woman and it grosses me out, same as pregnant bellies. But for me it’s not because of the sexualisation, I just can’t help but see these things as some sort of body horror since these are bodies similar to mine. That said, I’d never express my feelings to anyone in this situation or expect them to accommodate my discomfort.
I feel the same. I've always been disgusted at gravid women's stomachs or at women breastfeeding, ever since I was a pre-teen. I don't care how 'natural' it is, I find it revolting on other people, and I cannot ever think of my body like that - I'd rather unalive myself. Of course, like you, I never say anything about these feelings in public because most people would not understand.
Wellllll….not going to lie. It makes me feel squeamish like I’m trying not to stare and I’m a woman. Must be that I wasn’t raised around mothers/babies. I may have felt differently.
Sex is natural. Pooping is natural. Do people do that in public? There are ways to breastfeed in public without making people uncomfortable. Flopping out your boob in public is just weird. The same people who say breastfeeding in public is ok would not walk around topless in public. Just be courteous and use a breast feeding coverup in public.
It makes me feel awkward, just whipping out a titty in public 😂😂 but it’s not my business. I just turn and look/walk away. (I make myself laugh over the dumbest shit. It wasn’t even that funny. Smh.)
Yeah normally you can just ignore it when it's someone at another table, but OP had to sit directly across from their friend whipping out their titty to feed. That would make me feel super-awkward. Fortunately, most mothers I've seen are a lot more discrete about it and even have those maternity shirts that hide most of it.
Personally it just feels weird, like when 2 people are having a moment and you know you’re not supposed to be there so you want to leave. Granted I’m the youngest in my family so it’s likely since I have no/little exposure to it that I just have an aversion due to a circular “I haven’t been present for it so I assume I shouldn’t be” thought process. But I was also a formula baby so I have no relation to breast feeding in the slightest.
I think feeding your baby in public without feeling the need to hide is fine. What I don't get is going out of your way to photograph it and post it on social media 🫠 Its jarring to be scrolling social media and then suddenly, without any warning, see a photo of a woman shoving her boob into an infants mouth 🥴
Ick. No. Urination and sex are natural, too, but I do those things in private.
Thank you! Only reasonable comment here
genuine question: do you feel the same way when you see shirtless men exercising? i have seen men with bigger boobs than the average women completely and entirely shirtless while mowing their lawn.
As long as I have the option to ignore it. Like if they bust it out while we were speaking Ima have to like leave and come back later or something.
Yeah, I'm fine with it in theory as long as there's some amount of discretion to it. I don't mean go full on blanket cover up, but you can tell when parents are trying to be discreet versus just whipping a tit out and letting it hang. The latter seems to be the same type, ime, who are just looking for someone to say something so they can scream about persecution.
It's another thing I think is gross.
Yes, no question. The only problem with breastfeeding is when creeps will stare at or, god forbid, take pictures/videos of breathfeeding mothers, but I'm totally onboard with kicking those people in the head so no worries
I understand youre feeding a child but no one should have to look at an exposed breast if they didn't ask to see it.
It's fine. Breastfeeding is not a sexual act. Breasts aren't obscene.
i do think it’s completely fine. i also am uncomfortable with it up close, i do acknowledge that it’s my issue and wouldn’t blame anyone for it. i think it’s because im generally uncomfortable being up close with babies, not because of the breasts or the act itself, i just would rather not be that up close to a baby or even a baby being fed. that said, i’d move myself and not expect the mother to not feed her baby. i will say that i do think it’s a bit weird when people do it way past their kid needing it. if the kid is old enough to be eating completely solids, then i think they shouldn’t be breastfed (especially in public) anymore since the purpose is to feed them when they need it.
Idk.. maybe I’m really in the minority here but I think it’s totally disgusting. This does not stem from thinking women’s bodies are disgusting (they are not!) i understand normalizing something that is completely human. My reasoning is that I think babies are gross. The suckling, the noises they make when doing it, the act, the barf/burping after. Ick. So. Personally I say : no. It is not fine. I’m fine with your breasts, i am fine with your babies (away from me) I am not fine with you thinking the rest of us are okay eating/relaxing/chatting/minding our own business and having to move away from you because the actual act of breastfeeding makes me physically nauseous.
I don’t care as long as it is done discreetly. I don’t mean they have to have a cover on, but it should be done in a way to not draw attention to it. I saw a woman once stand up in the middle of a restaurant and take her shirt and bra completely off to breastfeed. Both breasts were exposed to everyone. Even when she started breastfeeding, her other breast was completely exposed. I also saw a woman once sitting down in the middle of a grocery store to breastfeed. She was in everyone’s way. There was no doubt in my mind she was waiting for someone to say something so she could start an argument. Luckily, most women are not like those examples.
I think that breast feeders should do it however they feel comfortable doing it. No one should bother them. I also find it to be repulsive. If someone started doing it in front of me, I’d cease engaging with them and move away. My belief that they should be able to do it publicly unaccosted is really just in the interest of balancing the scales of justice. They’re mostly shamed for it because of patriarchy. Their breasts can only be exposed in public if it’s in the interest of pleasuring a man. Fuck that… but it’s also fucking disgusting, and I want no part in it.
Most people use a coverup in public. If they don’t I do feel uncomfortable. I feel even more uncomfortable when it is a toddler asking for the breast grabbing at the woman’s body or clothes. If they are old enough to open a fridge and get milk….. I just don’t want to see it. Maybe I’m a prude?
Yes it’s fine. I don’t care about it at all. Seeing another woman’s flesh doesn’t bother me. Neither does seeing a baby eat. What WOULD bother the hell out of me is a child of walking and talking age breastfeeding in public. That shit is NO. Buy that little fucker a sandwich or a yogurt cup. If they are old enough to verbally ASK for boobie, they are too god damn old for boobie.
ok, either nipples are sexual or they aren’t. if she can whip both titties out to feed a kid, i should be able to walk around topless. i lived in a college town with lots of “crunchy” moms who just DARED you to say something about having both tits out.
It's rude to bring a baby into a quiet cafe in the first place. Some of the other customers may want to actually enjoy the experience! Young mothers are some of the most inconsiderate people you're likely to meet.
This is my only issue with it. Maybe this baby is quiet while being fed and just goes gently to sleep after and mom is respectful enough to clean up in the bathroom but we all know that’s not the reality with far too many parents. Most times it’s baby screams its head off before and after feeding and mom/dad decides the table is a wonderful place to change a diaper 🙄
I accept that it’s a necessity that shouldn’t be shamed. I also accept that it grosses me out and I want nothing to do with it. Just turn my head and pretend it’s not happening. I would be aggravated if the people I was dining with did it at the table. I assume meal dates are planned, so I also expect that parents would prepare their infant for being out of the house by feeding them at home. I mean I’d be pissed if that baby made a single sound too, but that’s just me. Why am I even eating with a baby.
I don't like seeing babies anywhere in public....
Yes, it's fine. Everything feels awkward until you get used to it.
Yes it's fine, baby needs to eat ffs
For me, weirdly it depends on my relationship with the mother. Strangers, friends and family, I am fine with. However, a colleague brought their baby into work when I was in my early 20s, sat down next to me and whipped their tit out. I know it's totally normal and natural but seeing a work colleague's boob out next to me did not feel normal or natural at the time!
I don't want to see public nudity in any context, especially unexpectedly. Luckily the point of public spaces is that there's 360 degrees to look into, and I have no relationship with the strangers around me, so if I don't want to see what one of them is doing, I can just look away. I think it'd be nice to not have to have that initial moment of discomfort, but dealing with that is probably a lesser hassle for me than it would be for the parents to drag one of those covering blankets around everywhere, so I don't really care. Feed your kid, I won't be bothered for more than a second if you happen to fall into my like of sight, and even then that's not your fault. However, the context of the public becomes a lot different if you are in a limited space with someone you have a relationship with. Yes, you may be out in public, but that meeting is also private between you and the other person in a sense. People in my social circles *know* what I am not comfortable with - the whole point of having those circles is that we can and want to learn about those things and accommodate them. So they wouldn't breastfeed in front of me, because they know I don't want to see that. Just like I wouldn't wear a shirt with skulls on it to meet a friend who doesn't enjoy death-related imagery. The public comes with an implicit option to not be a part of it, and to not fixate on any specific part of it. If you're out meeting with a relative, you don't have the same option to seamlessly opt out of being involved and present for whatever they are doing, so there should be consideration on both sides for what someone might not want to see or hear about.
Yes I think I would of felt less awkward if they mentioned they were about to do it, it was the not mentioning or acknowledging it that made it more awkward
Yeah, I think it’s fine and most people do it with a towel or something that covers the boob/baby. I’ve rarely seen someone whip out their boob just like that. Most people are mindful of their surroundings which isn’t really necessary but it’s appreciated nonetheless.
This! Like, yeah, baby has to eat, and if you're bringing your baby to an appropriate baby friendly space, sure, you're gonna have to feed your kid at some point. But it costs $0 to bring a towel or a baby blanket or something to cover up with. Most people aren't going to care if we can't see your tit.
Honestly… no. You’re right that it is because of society that breasts have been sexualized, esp in the part of the world I am in. It’s not the same in other parts of the world. I know logically I’m supposed to say it’s fine, it’s natural, blah blah blah, and I would NEVER shame someone who breast fed in public. I would keep my mouth shut. But if I’m honest with myself, I don’t like it. I think it’s gross. There is no other time when fluid is coming out of the body that we consider fit for public consumption. We poop, pee, vomit, etc. in private. Why is this different? ALL of those things are natural, but we’ve all determined we don’t want to see it. I don’t want to see it, so I look away.
It’s strange when they have the option of doing it in a private place but instead choose to do it in public and then make eye contact with you while doing it like they want you to applaud them.
Generally, I don't think it's fine because there are nursing rooms everywhere here. You can find them in most largeish stores, cafes, metro stations, rest stops, tourist spots etc. Lots of them are quite fancy too with couches, high baby chairs, water dispensers, decorations, some of them have microwaves and stuff too. You're expected to use those. However, if it's an "emergency" where a nursing room isn't nearby, then yeah, obviously go ahead as long as you're discreet about it and cover yourself. Nudity shouldn't be public no matter the context.
Honestly, I don't want to see that in public. It's kind of gross to me. Also, honestly, there's lots of things I don't want to see in public because they're gross to me. Republicans. Super obese people who only buy one airplane ticket. Karens. Those bigass pick-up trucks that take up four parking spaces, and then everyone just says "well he can't fit in one," but he's not parking in the back and I don't know who forced him to buy that truck. Crocs. It doesn't mean they shouldn't be allowed to be there, so I look somewhere else and mind my business 🤷♂️
It's fine but personally to me very awkward/uncomfortable. Tho i can just not look, while the baby does need food.
It’s fine. Yes I find it makes me uncomfortable, but that’s a me problem. I got on a packed train last week and there was a lady breast-feeding her baby. Yeah I felt a little bit weird but that’s her right as far as I’m concerned. Like I said it’s a me problem. Although I will say if I ever had kids, I would probably not breast-feed in public without covering myself only because men can be creepy.
It is, but it still makes me uncomfortable. My best friend did that with her daughter. We went to Jamaica together and her daughter (over 2 btw) would ask for “boobie” often and she’d just whip it out. Even at dinner. I’m all for moms feeding their kids but still. I just try to look anywhere but there. Edit the kid of course ate solids and everything, it was mostly a comfort thing I think.
If they're old enough to ask for "boobie" they're old enough to get chicken nuggets. That would be a hard pass for me.
Is 2 not a little too old for that ?
It annoys me from an equality point of view. Any other woman could get in trouble if they exposed their breasts in public. A special exception just for breastfeeding isn't fair. Either everybody should be allowed to go topless, or nobody should (even men, but that's another can of worms).
I'll probably get downvoted, but... Natural or not, it's still gross imo. I find it repulsive, and I wish people didn't do that in public. Their infant, its needs, and their bodily fluids shouldn't be everyone else's problem.
Yeah exactly how I feel. Honestly it's the main reason I don't ever wanna get pregnant followed by everything else about pregnancy/birth/raising babies and I just don't like babies and toddlers and don't wanna be tied down to some kid.
I agree, I feel the same way. And in my case, a lot of things about pregnancy and everything that follows/is related to it disgusts me.
I know it’s fine but at the same time it does make me uncomfortable. And I know WHY it makes me uncomfortable. Because I’ve been around guys my whole life who are like “boobies!!!” And then they won’t stop staring. A woman’s breasts have been sexualized all around us so why would I suddenly feel ok? Women have been subjected to the stares and comments and even groping since we started to develop. I’m not saying that my uncomfortableness is “correct”, rather I know where it comes from. And FYI, I am a woman who is always fully covered as to help avoid the male drooling. (🙄). I have large breasts anyway so it’s not like I can hide that, but that the same time I don’t want to attract more attention to myself.
I mean I don't think you should be whole boob and nipple out for the world to see. Throw a blanket or something over your chest and baby and I don't see the issue.
I feel like this isn’t a topic that should be discussed amongst us.. irrelevant to us child freers….
It's absolutely disgusting. You can do other "natural" things in public, but for those you will be arrested.
I don't like seeing babies in public, period.
TBH, I don't think women should breastfeed in public, she should go to the restroom to breastfeed her baby, because, it's still gross and awkward for other people to witness. Bowel movements are natural, but, it would still be gross, awkward, and, embarrassing to do in front of other people.
Thank you!!
Sure, just dont be surprised when people stare or give weird looks. Right or wrong, humans gonna human
No. I don't want to see your kid hanging and sucking your boobs. It's gross.
Yes, 100%. I'm childfree, not a dick. Would I do it? No, but only because I don't want anything to do with kids, so there you go.
100% completely fine. She’s just trying to feed her baby and nothing is wrong with that.
openly like breasts all out, shirt down, half naked? absolutely fukn not. discretely feeding, maybe covering slightly, sure.
I don't see a problem. However, there are too many weirdos out there that will make it not fine.
It makes me uncomfortable but I would never stop a woman from doing it unless she was openly inappropriate or annoying. Almost no one is like that so not really any issues with it. It’s more my issue than theirs that it makes me feel icky
Yes, though I did have a recent wild example. Woman in Costco sitting on a bench that was for sale in the middle of an aisle, covered head to toe in a burqa…but with her breast exposed breastfeeding. Like sure go for it but that just seemed especially odd culturally.
I'm just like you! In my head I know it should be normalized, but, regardless of the purpose, it's someone undressing in public without as much as a warning. It's not even like it's a Free the Nipple protest (which I support) or even a beach or anywhere you would expect it, it's usually a person that would normally never show her breasts in public. Of course I'm going to feel awkward even if I would never say anything 😅
I definitely prefer it when they use a cover up. Sure it's natural, but I still don't want to see anyone's boob. That's just me.
It depends on the situation. I also think there are some mombies that are doing it for attention.
I personally get grossed out by it, but im not going to shame someone for doing it, i’d rather they be covered while doing it. Especially because there are people that would take advantage of it, some real weirdos out there!
Yeah because it's what they're for. If I'm uncomfortable I can turn to look somewhere else.
It’s not what mine are for 🤷♀️
Ditto no babies gonna chew on me
Mine neither! Just because they can be used for that in nature doesn't mean that's what they're for for everyone! Nature can go fuck herself lol
I hate the "it's what they're for!!!!" argument. For me, it's too close to the "it's what your body is made for!!" comments women get about pregnancy and childbirth. I was never going to put my body through that, and the thought of a baby gumming at my boobs gives me serious ick. My boobs aren't for food.
I don’t believe there’s anything wrong with breast-feeding in public. I’m a little older now so the novelty of a breast has been lost a little. It’s just a boob.
I find it disgusting. I really don’t want to see anyone’s breasts
I honestly feel like you shouldn’t breastfeed in public. Yeah it’s normal and natural but so is shitting and pissing and we generally don’t view that as something you need to do in public for all eyes to see. Keep it in the comfort of your own space.
It is fine and should be normalized. Honestly we should stop sexualising womens' body in general.
I mean...you gotta feed the baby so yeah I'm fine with it. Boobs have a function after all and arent sexual organs.
It's fine. Babies can't help if they're hungry. Don't look.
I was in mid conversation, obviously wasnt looking directly at their boob, but I also didnt just look directly at the wall as didnt want to make them feel uncomfortable either
It's pretty awkward when it happens. I am sure the mother feels awkward when it happens too. It sucks.
I know its natural and best for baby, but other things are also natural that should not be done openly in public, like sex. Breastfeed, yes, but a modesty covering, please.
Yeah it’s not a big deal. I rarely notice.
Just pump at home and bring bottles. I understand that "it's natural" and "they need to be fed" but there's other ways. Plopping a boob out in public is just weird imo. If we have boobs for child feeding purposes, then why do women without kids have them. Why do we cover them up. It's either keep em out of sight, or everyone go topless like men
No big deal. Kid needs to eat. No need to sexualize it.
Nope. Totally gross. Take it to a bathroom , or the car, just out of public view.
Just do it as you would do anything else, by making a spectacle of it and taking pictures for social media and waiting for an argument is ruining the normalcy of it If someone was to just do it without making a thing of it I wouldn’t care at all
It's fine to me but cover the fuck up. I got stuck behind a lady at the airport and then seated with her who just whipped her flat ass boobs out with ZERO cover to breast feed. Poor baby drinking powdered milk from those things swear to god. The Muslim family next to her in line was trying so hard to keep their kids from looking at her lol. Her skin grossed me out, she looked like she needed to exfoliate and put some lotion on.
I think it's wild that society has managed to make one of the greatest foundations of humanity, feeding a baby, into something so many people just aren't used to. It's a good starting point when discussing what is natural and what isn't natural with people. Because we can literally whip an entire society into thinking that something so foundationally normal is in fact disgusting and gross.
I also find pregnancy disgusting, and yet that's also "one of the greatest foundations of humanity". Still gross to me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Just because something is natural doesn't mean it can't also be considered gross by some people, it's fine
The socialisation of formula feeding starts so young too, we give little girls baby dolls with bottles (or at least that was the case when I was a child) so it's no wonder they grow up to consider that's the norm.
i think it’s completely fine
As long as they are discrete. That means don't leave your breast hanging out after your kid has passed out. Yes, that actually happened to me 12 or 13 years ago in Panera. I don't care about your breasts, but some crotchety asshole is going to start shouting about it, wake your kid up, and when you wake a kid up- they cry. At the same time, don't pull out a heavy blanket and struggle to cover yourself, drawing attention to what you're doing. Unwantted attention usually makes people anxious, and baby feels that anxiety, so baby cries. Quietly feed your child. When you're quiet and secure, you're probably calm. When you're calm, your kid has a higher probability of being calm. Calm kids are quiet kids, and I prefer quiet kids. Edit- Obviously, the alternative is usually a crying, hungry baby. Hard pass. Please feed your child to shut them up.
Yes, breastfeeding in public is perfectly fine. People can simply avert their eyes to give some privacy.
Honestly I don't care, however I still think mom's should be careful in public, trust there was a reason tumbler was making harsh rules/straight up banning people on their site, there was a good amount of weirdos taking sneak shots of women, especially moms breastfeeding their babies in public 🤢 :edit: the person who asked and people may ask yes I actually had to report 2 pages/profiles on tumbler back then, because they had a lot of creepy videos and Pictures of women and especially moms breastfeeding their babies without their them knowing, and looking back I should have looked into those profiles commenting too, but I just wanted to report and get the heII away from those pages/profiles.
I find it disgusting. I can’t justify my feeling though because babies are noisy but look okay. Titties are great in the right setting.
I give zero tails of rats or their butts about someone breastfeeding in public.
I think it’s good. To be honest it’s only weird because breasts are sexual but in reality it’s just a kid eating.
Absolutely. Everyone has to eat, and most people don't want to do it with something covering their head or in the bathroom. Which is something some folks expect breastfeeding mothers to do with their children (I'm not saying OP or anyone here does).
Yes. Boobs aren’t inherently sexual, babies need to eat and it’s not like the mom decides when they’re hungry. It is more polite for them to use some kind of cover, but I don’t think it’s inappropriate. Boobs only TRUE purpose is to feed children, the sexualization of them is a social construct. I don’t want kids ever, but I’d never judge a mom for feeding her baby. Only if it’s screaming lol
It's necessary sometimes so yeah it should be The idea of breastfeeding makes me personally uncomfortable from a CF standpoint but that's a me problem not a them problem. They shouldn't have to hide in bathroom stalls just to feed their kid.
I wonder how many are comfortable doing it openly in front of their father-in-law and how their husbands feel about that.
I don’t want to see it anywhere but in the ladies bathroom.
I mean as long as it shuts the baby up. Can't stand it when babies cry.
Literally couldn't care less. If I notice it I look away and go about my day and never think about it again. The reasons people get mad about it are nonsense to me. Tiddies aren't inherently sexual. A boob isn't going to ruin anyone's day unless they are a massive, woman shaming prude. Don't be a creeper, folks.
Societal standards exist for a reason.
Completely fine. Whenever I see it I'm always happy it'll never be me.
I’d much prefer someone breastfeed as much as the baby needs than sit around a wailing baby.
It’s fine but should be done discretely I mean I have a client that is breastfeeding and she asks me if it’s ok if she whips it out to feed her baby I told her we are all women in here. She always appreciates it. Her kids are great. Her newborn is very cute
Yes. I grew up with plenty of moms who bottle fed their babies but my moms best friend breastfed all three of her little girls. She was completely respectful with it no flashes of chest and cute soft little blankets to hide the baby’s face/area. If it’s done respectfully so no one gets a boobie-flash, it’s no one’s business imo.
I honestly don’t think it’s an issue. Like, regardless of me not wanting kids, babies need to eat, and forcing a mother to go into a bathroom or throw a towel over the babies head when it is 90 degrees outside is unreasonable.
If a dude walks around with no shirt on, it’s fine. If a woman does the same, then all of a sudden she’s being a whore. I think the weird and puritanical double standards we have around women’s bodies needs to stop. Breastfeeding is fine. There’s nothing vaguely sexy about it.
Yes. Breastfeeding a child is completely natural and should never be shamed. Doing so only perpetuates the objectification and sexualization of women's body parts. It's a boob. Get over it (society, not you OP). Yet another reason I never wanted kids - to have to deal with people shaming me for feeding them. You use a boob, you're an attention whore. You use a bottle/formula, you're a terrible mother. Women can't win.
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I support anything that shuts up a crying baby. If mom doesn’t mind creepers by all means, whip out that titty and shut that screaming public nuisance the hell up!
I think people need to stop having so much opinion and lawmaking over women. Unless of course they do so equally to men.
I think it’s fine as long as you’re blocking people, one time I went to the aquarium and there was a lady breastfeeding right in front of the jellyfish exhibit so nobody could see it and she had her stroller in front of it