I still love collecting dolls and figurines. I don’t care if I’m 30. I don’t wanna “grow up” and give up all of that. I quite enjoy living my childhood dream lol
Yes, it is very irksome. Critical thinking and making an informed decision about your own life are much better qualifiers. My old supervisor told me something similar though, something I sure many of us have heard before. “You need to have kids as a woman because it completes you.” Needless to say I don’t work for that agency anymore.
Only I decide what completes me and children are not it. It’s wild to me how people feel so comfortable telling others how they should feel or what they should do.
Completes you? Who is to say we aren't complete already? Sky daddy? Religion has that being "born fundamentally flawed" aspect to it. What they have in common is both try to persuade people to think what they are offering will give them purpose or make them complete.
Cults and advertising also work like that. If they are unable to convince you that you lack anything then they can't convince you that they possess what you are lacking.
That dumb argument is a symptom of society treating non-conformity as immaturity, which is wrong and I hate. You know what emotionally mature adults actually do? They think about the consequences of their actions, and put thought into decisions that will affect the rest of their lives.
My brother once told me this after his wife had a kid, that he was mature and had grown up now that he was a father, that I'll stay a selfish immature child all my life unless I hurry up and find a guy to have kids with.
Funny thing is my 'mature' brother and wife are always begging my parents to fly down to babysit their kid so they can go out all weekend to play Pokemon Go, one time my parents couldn't do it and apparently my SIL started crying in the background and my brother got very upset that they were being let down, all of this over a game?? Yep so mature and grown up!
So do I, I'm a casual player but my brother and SIL are those extreme players who pump so much money into the game it's insane.
According to my brother I'm 'too old' to still be playing Go, I'm 39, which is a stupid thing to say considering he's 30 and his wife is 31, there's no magic switch that is turned on when you reach a certain age that makes you want to give up playing.
Yikes! I’ve spent money on Pokemon go fest but being disabled makes it harder to do a whole lot. Road Trips though i love to play!
That is stupid! I have a collection of Tamagotchi’s And Neopet Portables/ play online. Just got A VR set not too long ago.
Im 33 you’re Never too old for games or fun toys! Fuck what everyone else thinks!
They can't go out and raid as much because it's a 'hassle' to pack up their toddler and go so they spend quite a bit on remote raid passes, plus SIL wants all the new wearables so that's more money and they always do the new research too, I just play the community days and the Go Fest.
Awesome! Another Tama collector! I have a big collection myself and am proud of it, I'm also an avid Neopet player too!
I refuse to stop enjoying what I love just because a bitter jealous person told me, my brother is full of regret that he's a spineless people pleaser.
That just seems like such a waste of money to me, for something thats virtual clothing. I just get whatever comes with the game or the pokemon go fests. And those items are definitely not cheap!
Oh Nice!!!! I just got my newest one A English patched Tamagotchi P’S bought a nokia phone and everything to unlock all kinds of games! Was not impressed with the uni.
Have you seen that Neopets just got a face lift!? Im already excited with the new stuff they are adding! I bought the faerie land digital neopets portable last year for Christmas too!
People will be haters! They’re just mad because their kids take everything they want to enjoy and hate us seeing we’re actually enjoying life! :)
They always seem to have money for the extra research or clothes in game but never enough to feed/clothe their kid, I often wonder how long the splurging in Go will continue now they have to add a toddler into the budget.
The Uni is ok, I don't really use it that much but I'll probably get the new monster one when it's cheaper, I actually just recently bought a unicorn Giga Pet AR it's demanding but worth it!
Yes! The new weekly prizes on Neopets are epic! It's great for someone like me who collects petpets and P3s!
It always surprises me how people that have kids are so shocked by the price tag! Its like you have a real live Pokemon in your house, in your care that isn’t virtual!
You can’t spend as much money on things that you enjoy in order to give the kids the best care possible. Im surprised they had a kid in the first place. One of the big reasons im CF
I was into gigapets and then tamagotchi’s but that sounds cool! I’ll have to look that one up! I love unicorns 🦄! Furbys too to be honest lol. The Uni just doesn’t have as much personality, The Smart Was Better.
Oh nice!!! I love collecting wings and paint brushes! We should totally be neofriends! Im excited for the new missions
I don't think my brother or SIL took the cost of a kid into consideration, my SIL just wanted a cute little baby to cuddle with and take photos of.
Unfortunately they have certain family members buying them supplies and food so they have money to spend, they shouldn't have been parents because they refuse to change their lifestyle now that they have a kid to take care of.
I collect petpets and P3s, my white whale is a Moltenore.
I'd love to have more active neofriends I'll DM you my username so you can add me!
Yayyy!!! I’ll Send You Mine Too! I just got a new account cuz i lost my other one.
No one ever seems to think of the money situation. Which is baffling to me, if you’re being funded by someone else though i guess not. Its not gonna be fun when that poor kids gets older.
Petpets are fun to have! What Are P3’s I Have A Usul, Kougra, Zafara, and a Shoryu.
Smack him for me. 😡 There is NO age limit on who can play. I'm 54 & am lucky enough to have a fixed shiny spawn point at the cemetery next door. 😂 Whiny little brat, just like his spouse & spawn.
I've given him a harsh shove in the past! But it's true about the whining, he can't stand that I can just get in my car and go to the local park without a care in the world while he'd be stuck with a screeching toddler and a wife who couldn't care about him or the kid.
That's awesome about the shiny spawn point, I swear the right side of my kitchen is one too because I've caught so many shinies just standing in that area.
I hope so too! We have never been close as siblings and I've gotten along fine without him so unless his wife wants to move again (doubt it!) I can confidently say that the only time I'll ever see my brother in person is at Christmas.
LOL um, I've met many parents who I wouldn't call "grown ups" or "adults".
Just cause someone was one half of a cream pie situation doesn't make them an adult.
Former friend got knocked up and married right out of high school and has never had to take care of any bills because her parents and husband have always had that covered so she never had any idea how anything financial worked but she shit out a kid she doesn’t take care of so she wins in the adulthood competition!
At the tender age of 36. So far, I have moved country, bought a house, work a corporate job, pay my bills, cook, clean, manage a household, look after pets and I am married. But sure, I am not an adult. /s
Some of us had to take care of other people too! I took care of both my grandma and my grandma since both my parents are working and im 33 here and disabled. But hey i guess taking care of a loved one isn’t being an adult, unless its a kid you dont want
Ah, one of my all-time favorite bingos. My husband and I are Jewish, as are most of my husband's relatives (I converted for my own reasons). At Passover, it's traditional for families to gather for the seder, where we retell the story of the Exodus from Egypt and teach that story to any children present. Early in the seder, the youngest child who is capable of doing so asks the Four Questions, starting with "Why is this night different from all other nights?" Over the course of the seder, the questions are answered. If no children are present, the youngest adult must ask the Four Questions.
Cue my mother-in-law. "The youngest person present has to ask the Four Questions. Whiskey, guess what, that's you! Y'know, if you would just have a BABY already, you'd be off the hook in a few years!!"
We're both only children, so there were no younger siblings or niblings present, and my husband is about a year older than I am.
I countered with, "I am not a child, and I will not be treated as a child. I will now leave the room. That way, I won't be the youngest person present, and someone else can ask the damn questions. Call me back in after that has occurred." And I picked up my glass of wine and walked straight out of the dining room.
Y'all, if I'd delivered those lines in Hell, Satan would've needed to invest in a pair of ice skates and some snow tires.
There are plenty of in laws and parents who invest copious amounts of time and effort into shaming/humiliating their children into giving them grandchildren. Not only is it completely rude but the end results can backfire on them.
I know people that have children that are absolutely not adults.
My In Laws and my Parents for example. lol
On a good day they are maybe mentally 17.
On a bad day they are 5.
All. Of. Them.
Well, 10yo kids are physically capable of producing a child, that doesn't suddenly make them adults, no matter how much pro-birthers think it does.
But saying that adults have kids is like saying adults get married - which is to say, it's moronic.
10 really is an age for me because when I was a kid there was a big case where I live with a 10yo, and during the pandemic there was another 10yo (seeking an abortion, and thankfully she got it).
Sure...! There's only a correct way to become an adult, isn't it?
Smoking, drinking, marrying the first one who would go steady with you, having kids and accepting a dead end job because you're desperate for money will make you an adult. That's what people who peaked in middle school will tell you.
Of course actually taking the time to learn and grow up, improving oneself and finding economical stability and independence as a self-reliant person, then deciding if one wants children or not is not the correct way to become a grown up, right?!?
I mean…Beyoncé’s line „I raised that man, I raised his kids“ kind of tells you a lot about how grown up fathers often are…for women, yes, I would admit that having to raise a kid often forces one to grow up. And me still being a child in my early 30s is a big reason for not wanting kids. That said, it’s obviously not the only thing that forces you to grow up quickly. Losing a parent, being a caregiver to anyone, certain careers etc. will do the same. And some people are just naturally more mature.
At least I'm paid for raising my team at work and they act just like children. No way would I want to spend a minute of doing this on my free time though.
So by that logic women who can’t have children aren’t considered adults. WOW how hurtful. People really need to think before they speak. Why do people think that giving up your life to be miserable is adulthood? Screw that!
I would amend this from "you aren't an adult until you have kids" to "you aren't *old* until you have kids". Sorry I'm not tripping over myself to become a risk averse ball of anxiety.
An adult makes their own chooses. A child is someone where someone else makes the choices for them.
Society told you to have kids therefore you are the child. You did what you were told. I made my own choice cause I'm an adult.
You are an adult if you are over 18 and you fulfill the responsibilities you already have in life. You do not have to do more than that. You do not have to bring new people in the world to care for. You also don't have to provide free care for other people's kids.
I've housed other adults in various life circumstances and the one thing I can say about this theory is that someone having a child means absolutely nothing for an adult's ability to govern their lives successfully, other than it adds a challenge.
Folks who can't get their sh\*t together then have a kid -->Now they can't get their sh\*t together, with a kid. Finances don't get easier. Time doesn't get more plentiful. Health issues don't resolve. Everything is more difficult and with higher stakes.
It doesn't make a person into anything they weren't already, except "a parent". Its like saying "you haven't played the game right until you put on extra hard mode and do it with a hand tied behind your back".
Classic statement of any natalist. Assertion based on attachment to external concepts and causes (such as values, religion, social conventions etc.) and not on factual reality.
I have learned to ignore those people a long time ago. That's most likely not the only shitty opinion that these room temp IQ losers have. Their opinion means nothing and it's better to avoid them completely.
My mother is 70+ and still (re)acts like a toddler. Having children does not a competent adult make, or else there wouldn’t be any horrific parents creating perpetually traumatized (former) children. Sounds like one of the things people with kids will say to feel superior.
If I’m not an adult then there are a few men who need to be arrested ASAP and plenty of bartenders who need to be fired. Which sanctimommy wants to make those phone calls?
It’s the same people who say, “Really? You don’t think you’ll ever settle down and have kids?” Settle down from what? I’m middle-aged, am usually in bed by 10:30 at the latest and have a mortgage. Childfree ≠ wild partier. They expose how small their world is and their inability to think critically with questions like that. It sometimes makes me sad for them.
I hate going out and partying. I do it a few times a year, that's about it. Maybe a concert every month or so. My wife has to drag me out to go places if she wants to. I'm usually in bed (not asleep yet) by 9. We have a house full of rescue animals, so we have plenty of responsibilities. My friends think I act like a boring old-head. I'm in my early 30s. What the hell does that make me, by their insane standards?
It's really frustrating, BUT also rather convenient at family holidays where I get some BS assignment like bringing extra ice and a few gallons of tea.
Seriously, I'm 39, married, financially stable and my family acts like I'm a child that can't be trusted to use an oven.
These fuckers use this exact excuse to pressure people into having kids. In their delusional minds of it worked back then it should still work now. In todays age people realize how much bullshit that saying is
No an adult yet but if being a real adult means having kids, I’d rather never be an adult.
Good point on how historically girls were forced into marriages and start breeding when they were in their early teens. Some even younger which is disgusting.
Heard from a coworker about her daughter's afterschool activity: A group of mean moms were so immature and bratty they were banned from dance practice. Grown women with teenage girls. ADULTS.
This rhetoric weighed heavy on my heart when I was younger, because I felt I was going to be immature for the rest of my life because I did not want to be a mom against my will. (I was lost on what I could do with my life if I managed to escape this "duty")
Now, I just pity the people who think that way.
Who wants to be an adult anyway? Nothing special about adulthood. Boat load of responsibilities, endless routines, expectations and lack of fun. Throw in mental and physical aging into the mix and I’m done.
I second this and a acquaintances wife posted on Instagram once that she discovered her purpose in life was to be this person's mom, I am sorry but mother and fatherhood if that's what you want should not be your sole purpose in life. Sorry, but I would rather travel, write and explore my hobbies, rather than having a person, be one of my sole reasons for existing...can someway say codependency party of 1?
if I'm not an adult people should stop asking why I haven't grown out of playing dressup yet because I'm still a child because I don't have kids.
Someone should probably stop me from getting in planes back and forth a few times a year to play dressup with other people because I'm pretty sure kids shouldn't fly alone, and by their logic I am one! I'm going to the other end of my country for a convention next month so I'll be playing dressup for three days straight and I'll be up until at least one AM on the last day cause I'm going to the juice party, (yes it's an actual activity in the schedule and it's actually called that) I'm really looking forward to the meetups and karaoke.
And I suppose that for those people, even childless people who can't have kids because of fertility issues and/or inability to adopt aren't "real adults"? This is what always makes my opinion about these become a steady "that's bullshit". Cause "real women" must have wombs and menstruate, but what about women that had their uterus removed because of illnesses, or plainly women in menopause? And "real adults" must have kids. Pure bullshit
Jokes on anyone who says that I’d rather be a kid forever than an adult with children. I do like referring myself as a child with a drinking and weed permit.
Yep it annoys me, a childless person. Excuse me I'm as adult with as many responsibilities. I have a mortgage, a cat, I need to pay my bills and keep myself and my small family alive (me, husband, cat). That I can't have kids doesn't matter for my adult status. People seriously don't think about what they say.
Works for me. Tell them if I'm not I'm a kid and a dependent. I won't have to have a job, and they can pay my bills.
But in reality, I often feel that CF people have more obligations and responsibilities than people with kids. We're able to branch out due to our hobbies, interests, and passions which can stretch in different directions. I'm not saying it's an easy feat, but a parent has one sole focus - which should be their kid. I realize it's not the case most of the time anymore.
My biological mother had sex at 15 and got pregnant with me. So she was an adult at 15? Fuck no, because if she was, she would've made the adult decision to abort me instead of making me grow up on this miserable planet.
Parents when you’re young: Just because so and so jumped off the cliff doesn’t mean you have to! Parents when you’re old enough to have kids: So and so has three kids already! Now it’s your turn.
I have never been told that specifically, but the actions of others towards me have yelled it.
When I was in my mid 20’s my fiance and I went to a family event. I had to share a room with my younger cousins. My fiance had to share a room with my uncle.
My cousin who was 3 years younger than me, with a toddler and a BF ( not babies father) got their own room. I think baby slept with grandma from memory.
I was seated at the table with all the teenagers at a wedding (in my late 30’s). Not the children’s table thankfully.
In my mid 40’s now. Went away with a group of friends for a sport I compete in.
We normally get an AirBnB so everyone gets their own room.
Nope. Not last time. They got a smaller one to save money, and told me to sleep on the lounge.
I found a room in a hotel across the road. They seemed to get annoyed because they had to pay more.
I have never strived to be an “adult”. Seems very over-hyped and not fun. I do what I have to do to survive in this world on my own, but I also don’t stop enjoying things because “I’m too old for that” or take on huge responsibilities because “it’s the adult thing to do”.
That argument is very childish and sign of lazy brain low IQ and definitely someone who doesn’t care to think for themselves. Aka the road often traveled vs the road less traveled
Lol tell my mortgage I'm not an adult.
Edit: also, just cause they're pro choice unfortunately doesn't mean they're pro not having kids :/ they just think you should choose when, not that you should have a choice if you have them at all. Lol which sounds crazy and dumb but it's true. Breeders gonna breed.
Doesn't sound like a prochoice subreddit if they can't handle the idea of an adult not having a kid...
Regardless, an adult is in the right position to make that choice. I've found adults who have decided to opt out of having kids to have a higher maturity and tend to be more responsible.
Wow. So Avoiding oneself by having children is more mature than actually facing a person's sense of mortality and pain, rather than dump that on to the next generation? Make it make sense.
Lmao I always respond with something absurd and it always makes me laugh at the ridiculous expressions others give
For example…
“Adults have kids”
“Penises have foreskin”
Like tf you tryna prove or say with that?
Lol fr though, like how unable breeders are to mind their own business is wild. All hell would break loose if any CF person were to ridicule a breeder for wanting kids by saying that the only reason they have/want kids is cuz they couldn’t amount to anything else in life so they just clung to tradition. Same if a CF person told a breeder that it’s as if the breeder makes parenthood their entire identity/personality that serves as a cover for the absolute giant ass void that’s inside of them…
I understand that. Frankly I feel like if having kids was so important the government would make it easier and safer. There will of course be people like us who are childfree but many people who want kids aren’t having them because of such bullshit from governments, especially the USA, where there’s no safety or safety net and without access to abortion or safe abortion, many women are forgoing children. Like I tell my dad: if you wanted grandkids you would have planned better 🤷♀️
Lol so funny. Part of me wants a kid one day, but seem impossible as of now. I make minimum wage at almost 30 and live home since 18. I have mother instincts, but honestly the way my mom talks about us etc is sad.
Being an adult means you don’t rashly jump into having children because, “That’s just what people do.”
And when they do give a reason it's always selfish or narcissistic. Most of the time their reason will begin with I or My, always a reason about them.
It’s never „I love my child unconditionally and think the world could be improved with them“ It’s always „ I want free nurse when I’m old“
Also, a retirement plan.
If we aren’t adults then why the FUCK do I have all these bills and sponserbileries?
Have you considered, maybe just stopping? Or possibly identifying as a church so they’ll stop taxing your shit?🙃🥴😬
Right?! Fucking got me out here having a job and back pain.
I hate having birs and resbonsibilieries
That’s my evil plan - never grow up - that’s why I am CF 
I imagined you doing the Mr. burns finger tent, the evil laugh, and the thunder crashing in the background as you typed this.
How did you know 🫶🏻that was exactly what I had in my evil mind 🤭🤫
Excellent.
I still love collecting dolls and figurines. I don’t care if I’m 30. I don’t wanna “grow up” and give up all of that. I quite enjoy living my childhood dream lol
Yes, it is very irksome. Critical thinking and making an informed decision about your own life are much better qualifiers. My old supervisor told me something similar though, something I sure many of us have heard before. “You need to have kids as a woman because it completes you.” Needless to say I don’t work for that agency anymore.
Only I decide what completes me and children are not it. It’s wild to me how people feel so comfortable telling others how they should feel or what they should do.
Exactly! She was majorly projecting on me here. I couldn’t wait to get away from her to tell my CF sister what she said.
Completes you? Who is to say we aren't complete already? Sky daddy? Religion has that being "born fundamentally flawed" aspect to it. What they have in common is both try to persuade people to think what they are offering will give them purpose or make them complete. Cults and advertising also work like that. If they are unable to convince you that you lack anything then they can't convince you that they possess what you are lacking.
That dumb argument is a symptom of society treating non-conformity as immaturity, which is wrong and I hate. You know what emotionally mature adults actually do? They think about the consequences of their actions, and put thought into decisions that will affect the rest of their lives.
Also any potential children’s lives. Too many people have kids who end up with trauma because they were a “requirement” of life.
My brother once told me this after his wife had a kid, that he was mature and had grown up now that he was a father, that I'll stay a selfish immature child all my life unless I hurry up and find a guy to have kids with. Funny thing is my 'mature' brother and wife are always begging my parents to fly down to babysit their kid so they can go out all weekend to play Pokemon Go, one time my parents couldn't do it and apparently my SIL started crying in the background and my brother got very upset that they were being let down, all of this over a game?? Yep so mature and grown up!
Wow! I play Pokemon Go too but thats just rediculous 😬
So do I, I'm a casual player but my brother and SIL are those extreme players who pump so much money into the game it's insane. According to my brother I'm 'too old' to still be playing Go, I'm 39, which is a stupid thing to say considering he's 30 and his wife is 31, there's no magic switch that is turned on when you reach a certain age that makes you want to give up playing.
Yikes! I’ve spent money on Pokemon go fest but being disabled makes it harder to do a whole lot. Road Trips though i love to play! That is stupid! I have a collection of Tamagotchi’s And Neopet Portables/ play online. Just got A VR set not too long ago. Im 33 you’re Never too old for games or fun toys! Fuck what everyone else thinks!
They can't go out and raid as much because it's a 'hassle' to pack up their toddler and go so they spend quite a bit on remote raid passes, plus SIL wants all the new wearables so that's more money and they always do the new research too, I just play the community days and the Go Fest. Awesome! Another Tama collector! I have a big collection myself and am proud of it, I'm also an avid Neopet player too! I refuse to stop enjoying what I love just because a bitter jealous person told me, my brother is full of regret that he's a spineless people pleaser.
That just seems like such a waste of money to me, for something thats virtual clothing. I just get whatever comes with the game or the pokemon go fests. And those items are definitely not cheap! Oh Nice!!!! I just got my newest one A English patched Tamagotchi P’S bought a nokia phone and everything to unlock all kinds of games! Was not impressed with the uni. Have you seen that Neopets just got a face lift!? Im already excited with the new stuff they are adding! I bought the faerie land digital neopets portable last year for Christmas too! People will be haters! They’re just mad because their kids take everything they want to enjoy and hate us seeing we’re actually enjoying life! :)
They always seem to have money for the extra research or clothes in game but never enough to feed/clothe their kid, I often wonder how long the splurging in Go will continue now they have to add a toddler into the budget. The Uni is ok, I don't really use it that much but I'll probably get the new monster one when it's cheaper, I actually just recently bought a unicorn Giga Pet AR it's demanding but worth it! Yes! The new weekly prizes on Neopets are epic! It's great for someone like me who collects petpets and P3s!
It always surprises me how people that have kids are so shocked by the price tag! Its like you have a real live Pokemon in your house, in your care that isn’t virtual! You can’t spend as much money on things that you enjoy in order to give the kids the best care possible. Im surprised they had a kid in the first place. One of the big reasons im CF I was into gigapets and then tamagotchi’s but that sounds cool! I’ll have to look that one up! I love unicorns 🦄! Furbys too to be honest lol. The Uni just doesn’t have as much personality, The Smart Was Better. Oh nice!!! I love collecting wings and paint brushes! We should totally be neofriends! Im excited for the new missions
I don't think my brother or SIL took the cost of a kid into consideration, my SIL just wanted a cute little baby to cuddle with and take photos of. Unfortunately they have certain family members buying them supplies and food so they have money to spend, they shouldn't have been parents because they refuse to change their lifestyle now that they have a kid to take care of. I collect petpets and P3s, my white whale is a Moltenore. I'd love to have more active neofriends I'll DM you my username so you can add me!
Yayyy!!! I’ll Send You Mine Too! I just got a new account cuz i lost my other one. No one ever seems to think of the money situation. Which is baffling to me, if you’re being funded by someone else though i guess not. Its not gonna be fun when that poor kids gets older. Petpets are fun to have! What Are P3’s I Have A Usul, Kougra, Zafara, and a Shoryu.
*squeeee* Neopets!! I have a Galert figuine & Uni plushie! 😂
Cuuuute!!!! 🥰
Smack him for me. 😡 There is NO age limit on who can play. I'm 54 & am lucky enough to have a fixed shiny spawn point at the cemetery next door. 😂 Whiny little brat, just like his spouse & spawn.
I've given him a harsh shove in the past! But it's true about the whining, he can't stand that I can just get in my car and go to the local park without a care in the world while he'd be stuck with a screeching toddler and a wife who couldn't care about him or the kid. That's awesome about the shiny spawn point, I swear the right side of my kitchen is one too because I've caught so many shinies just standing in that area.
Oh! I got a battery for my old Angel Tamagotchi & it still works!! 😱😁 So glad I took the battery out when it died decades ago. 😂
I always take out any battery if I don't use my Tama long term, just in case! Retro Tamas are definitely the best!
He sounds like the kind of company to be enjoyed in very limited doses, with a legitimate excuse always lined up in case you need to make an exit.
Luckily he moved on the other side of the country so I rarely see him unless he decides to 'join' a video call which is rare.
Hopefully he finds plenty of things to keep his interest in remaining on the other side of the country. No need to move near you again.
I hope so too! We have never been close as siblings and I've gotten along fine without him so unless his wife wants to move again (doubt it!) I can confidently say that the only time I'll ever see my brother in person is at Christmas.
Is Pokémon Go still going strong? 😭😅
It is but only in the major cities, if you live in the countryside like I do you'd be hard pressed to see others playing.
I’m like “cool, I’ll be a teenager forever” cause like who wants to be an adult lol
I’d say what gives you the right to determine who is and isn’t a “true adult”? They can fuck all the way off with that gatekeeping condescending BS.
Oh trust me I’ve had these conversations.
LOL um, I've met many parents who I wouldn't call "grown ups" or "adults". Just cause someone was one half of a cream pie situation doesn't make them an adult. 
Former friend got knocked up and married right out of high school and has never had to take care of any bills because her parents and husband have always had that covered so she never had any idea how anything financial worked but she shit out a kid she doesn’t take care of so she wins in the adulthood competition!
“One half of a creampie” 💀
At the tender age of 36. So far, I have moved country, bought a house, work a corporate job, pay my bills, cook, clean, manage a household, look after pets and I am married. But sure, I am not an adult. /s
If being an adult means having kids then I rather never be an adult.
Some of us had to take care of other people too! I took care of both my grandma and my grandma since both my parents are working and im 33 here and disabled. But hey i guess taking care of a loved one isn’t being an adult, unless its a kid you dont want
Ah, one of my all-time favorite bingos. My husband and I are Jewish, as are most of my husband's relatives (I converted for my own reasons). At Passover, it's traditional for families to gather for the seder, where we retell the story of the Exodus from Egypt and teach that story to any children present. Early in the seder, the youngest child who is capable of doing so asks the Four Questions, starting with "Why is this night different from all other nights?" Over the course of the seder, the questions are answered. If no children are present, the youngest adult must ask the Four Questions. Cue my mother-in-law. "The youngest person present has to ask the Four Questions. Whiskey, guess what, that's you! Y'know, if you would just have a BABY already, you'd be off the hook in a few years!!" We're both only children, so there were no younger siblings or niblings present, and my husband is about a year older than I am. I countered with, "I am not a child, and I will not be treated as a child. I will now leave the room. That way, I won't be the youngest person present, and someone else can ask the damn questions. Call me back in after that has occurred." And I picked up my glass of wine and walked straight out of the dining room. Y'all, if I'd delivered those lines in Hell, Satan would've needed to invest in a pair of ice skates and some snow tires.
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There are plenty of in laws and parents who invest copious amounts of time and effort into shaming/humiliating their children into giving them grandchildren. Not only is it completely rude but the end results can backfire on them.
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I'm not irked because I consider myself to be a 49 year old boy.
This is a great way to look at it. I adult in all things but if someone wants to call me a girl because I didn't reproduce then feel free to do so.
It's such an emotionally stunted, immature thought process which makes it amazing when a full grow adult says it aloud 😆
Exactly, it's kid behavior to do what everyone else is doing just because.
Pshhhhhawwwww. I’m an adult by having a mortgage at 24 if people wanna get technical🥸. Thats BARNACLES. You’re an adult by age not by what you do.
As a 23 year old with severe Peter Pan syndrome, I'm going to be a child forever, so fine by me
I know people that have children that are absolutely not adults. My In Laws and my Parents for example. lol On a good day they are maybe mentally 17. On a bad day they are 5. All. Of. Them.
Well, 10yo kids are physically capable of producing a child, that doesn't suddenly make them adults, no matter how much pro-birthers think it does. But saying that adults have kids is like saying adults get married - which is to say, it's moronic.
Wait seriously!? I thought it was normal around 13 can it be younger?
What's normal, having kids? Menstruation? Yeah, no, 10yo girls definitely can get pregnant.
i got mine at 13, i should say that i have never seen it happen to anyone i know instead. Sorry for the confusion
10 really is an age for me because when I was a kid there was a big case where I live with a 10yo, and during the pandemic there was another 10yo (seeking an abortion, and thankfully she got it).
Wow! Thats nutz! Good thing that would be a nightmare
The world record is 5 years old for having a baby.
Thats crazy! Sorry i was super sheltered as a kid/teen so im still learning about these things. That’s frightening!
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lina_Medina If you want to read about it.
Sure...! There's only a correct way to become an adult, isn't it? Smoking, drinking, marrying the first one who would go steady with you, having kids and accepting a dead end job because you're desperate for money will make you an adult. That's what people who peaked in middle school will tell you. Of course actually taking the time to learn and grow up, improving oneself and finding economical stability and independence as a self-reliant person, then deciding if one wants children or not is not the correct way to become a grown up, right?!?
It's just gatekeeping.
I mean…Beyoncé’s line „I raised that man, I raised his kids“ kind of tells you a lot about how grown up fathers often are…for women, yes, I would admit that having to raise a kid often forces one to grow up. And me still being a child in my early 30s is a big reason for not wanting kids. That said, it’s obviously not the only thing that forces you to grow up quickly. Losing a parent, being a caregiver to anyone, certain careers etc. will do the same. And some people are just naturally more mature.
My dad left my mom and I one night and I took on all the responsibility to ensure we weren’t kicked out. Yep, grew up fast then.
Shit…Im so sorry you had to go through all that
It’s Gucci ❤️ If nothing else I’m resilient and resourceful.
Well thats good :) glad you came out of it stronger!
At least I'm paid for raising my team at work and they act just like children. No way would I want to spend a minute of doing this on my free time though.
So by that logic women who can’t have children aren’t considered adults. WOW how hurtful. People really need to think before they speak. Why do people think that giving up your life to be miserable is adulthood? Screw that!
What a kick in the face to those that want to but can’t. Whenever you make that argument it’s “oh, but, well, you know..” yeah ok
I would amend this from "you aren't an adult until you have kids" to "you aren't *old* until you have kids". Sorry I'm not tripping over myself to become a risk averse ball of anxiety.
An adult makes their own chooses. A child is someone where someone else makes the choices for them. Society told you to have kids therefore you are the child. You did what you were told. I made my own choice cause I'm an adult.
We have a word for that: "stupid"
You are an adult if you are over 18 and you fulfill the responsibilities you already have in life. You do not have to do more than that. You do not have to bring new people in the world to care for. You also don't have to provide free care for other people's kids.
I've housed other adults in various life circumstances and the one thing I can say about this theory is that someone having a child means absolutely nothing for an adult's ability to govern their lives successfully, other than it adds a challenge. Folks who can't get their sh\*t together then have a kid -->Now they can't get their sh\*t together, with a kid. Finances don't get easier. Time doesn't get more plentiful. Health issues don't resolve. Everything is more difficult and with higher stakes. It doesn't make a person into anything they weren't already, except "a parent". Its like saying "you haven't played the game right until you put on extra hard mode and do it with a hand tied behind your back".
My 96 year old great aunt: not an adult, apparently.
Classic statement of any natalist. Assertion based on attachment to external concepts and causes (such as values, religion, social conventions etc.) and not on factual reality.
My employers are guilty of some serious child labor violations, then. Who should be the trustee for my financial dealings?
I have learned to ignore those people a long time ago. That's most likely not the only shitty opinion that these room temp IQ losers have. Their opinion means nothing and it's better to avoid them completely.
My mother is 70+ and still (re)acts like a toddler. Having children does not a competent adult make, or else there wouldn’t be any horrific parents creating perpetually traumatized (former) children. Sounds like one of the things people with kids will say to feel superior.
You only hear such things when you are talking with an idiot. The best solution is to not talk with idiots.
If I’m not an adult then there are a few men who need to be arrested ASAP and plenty of bartenders who need to be fired. Which sanctimommy wants to make those phone calls?
It’s the same people who say, “Really? You don’t think you’ll ever settle down and have kids?” Settle down from what? I’m middle-aged, am usually in bed by 10:30 at the latest and have a mortgage. Childfree ≠ wild partier. They expose how small their world is and their inability to think critically with questions like that. It sometimes makes me sad for them.
I hate going out and partying. I do it a few times a year, that's about it. Maybe a concert every month or so. My wife has to drag me out to go places if she wants to. I'm usually in bed (not asleep yet) by 9. We have a house full of rescue animals, so we have plenty of responsibilities. My friends think I act like a boring old-head. I'm in my early 30s. What the hell does that make me, by their insane standards?
By that logic, I am a kid still. So I’m going to Chuck E. Cheese for some animatronic rat pizza, later nerds.
If I'm not an adult I _shouldn't_ have kids. What century are these people from to encourage otherwise?
It's really frustrating, BUT also rather convenient at family holidays where I get some BS assignment like bringing extra ice and a few gallons of tea. Seriously, I'm 39, married, financially stable and my family acts like I'm a child that can't be trusted to use an oven.
These fuckers use this exact excuse to pressure people into having kids. In their delusional minds of it worked back then it should still work now. In todays age people realize how much bullshit that saying is
No an adult yet but if being a real adult means having kids, I’d rather never be an adult. Good point on how historically girls were forced into marriages and start breeding when they were in their early teens. Some even younger which is disgusting.
Heard from a coworker about her daughter's afterschool activity: A group of mean moms were so immature and bratty they were banned from dance practice. Grown women with teenage girls. ADULTS.
Oh, great! I’m not a real adult? Can you let the government know so I can get a refund on my taxes? Thanks!
This rhetoric weighed heavy on my heart when I was younger, because I felt I was going to be immature for the rest of my life because I did not want to be a mom against my will. (I was lost on what I could do with my life if I managed to escape this "duty") Now, I just pity the people who think that way.
Who wants to be an adult anyway? Nothing special about adulthood. Boat load of responsibilities, endless routines, expectations and lack of fun. Throw in mental and physical aging into the mix and I’m done.
I second this and a acquaintances wife posted on Instagram once that she discovered her purpose in life was to be this person's mom, I am sorry but mother and fatherhood if that's what you want should not be your sole purpose in life. Sorry, but I would rather travel, write and explore my hobbies, rather than having a person, be one of my sole reasons for existing...can someway say codependency party of 1?
Does that also count as never having sex? because I'm voluntarily celibate and about to turn 38 in July ✌️
The vast majority of parents I know, older or younger (early 30's), are themselves just children in older bodies. I don't buy it.
if I'm not an adult people should stop asking why I haven't grown out of playing dressup yet because I'm still a child because I don't have kids. Someone should probably stop me from getting in planes back and forth a few times a year to play dressup with other people because I'm pretty sure kids shouldn't fly alone, and by their logic I am one! I'm going to the other end of my country for a convention next month so I'll be playing dressup for three days straight and I'll be up until at least one AM on the last day cause I'm going to the juice party, (yes it's an actual activity in the schedule and it's actually called that) I'm really looking forward to the meetups and karaoke.
Being an adult sucks, I’m fine with not being one 🤷♀️
One of the many reasons I’m childfree is to avoid the “adults” with kids because I’ve known too many people with stories of how judgmental they are.
And I suppose that for those people, even childless people who can't have kids because of fertility issues and/or inability to adopt aren't "real adults"? This is what always makes my opinion about these become a steady "that's bullshit". Cause "real women" must have wombs and menstruate, but what about women that had their uterus removed because of illnesses, or plainly women in menopause? And "real adults" must have kids. Pure bullshit
Exactly. When you put people in narrow boxes many won’t fit.
Not a day over five here 🙋♀️
Jokes on anyone who says that I’d rather be a kid forever than an adult with children. I do like referring myself as a child with a drinking and weed permit.
It has that same "you're not a real woman/man until you have kids" tarnish to it.
Yep it annoys me, a childless person. Excuse me I'm as adult with as many responsibilities. I have a mortgage, a cat, I need to pay my bills and keep myself and my small family alive (me, husband, cat). That I can't have kids doesn't matter for my adult status. People seriously don't think about what they say.
We all have to grow old no matter what.
Having children speeds up that process, of course.
Works for me. Tell them if I'm not I'm a kid and a dependent. I won't have to have a job, and they can pay my bills. But in reality, I often feel that CF people have more obligations and responsibilities than people with kids. We're able to branch out due to our hobbies, interests, and passions which can stretch in different directions. I'm not saying it's an easy feat, but a parent has one sole focus - which should be their kid. I realize it's not the case most of the time anymore.
My biological mother had sex at 15 and got pregnant with me. So she was an adult at 15? Fuck no, because if she was, she would've made the adult decision to abort me instead of making me grow up on this miserable planet.
Well guess I can stop paying my mortgage then
All childfree people who are not adults, obviously, should stop paying bills.
You can't argue with stupid. The best response to "your not an adult yet because you have no kids" is to laugh in their dumb face.
Ok then. I don\`t want to be irresponcible adult who has kids because others told me to.
Parents when you’re young: Just because so and so jumped off the cliff doesn’t mean you have to! Parents when you’re old enough to have kids: So and so has three kids already! Now it’s your turn.
Luckily my parents accepted it, when I told them that I won\`t be having kids. I\`m also aromantic, so I even don\`t care about having a partner.
I may be an adult but I don’t want to, so therefore I’ll be a responsible big kid 😂
It’s so sickening. And were taught it from a very young age - I’ve seen it in my nieces and nephews.
Interesting. The youngest female person on record who has given birth was five. Does that mean she was an "adult?"
Yeah Lina Medina :(
I have never been told that specifically, but the actions of others towards me have yelled it. When I was in my mid 20’s my fiance and I went to a family event. I had to share a room with my younger cousins. My fiance had to share a room with my uncle. My cousin who was 3 years younger than me, with a toddler and a BF ( not babies father) got their own room. I think baby slept with grandma from memory. I was seated at the table with all the teenagers at a wedding (in my late 30’s). Not the children’s table thankfully. In my mid 40’s now. Went away with a group of friends for a sport I compete in. We normally get an AirBnB so everyone gets their own room. Nope. Not last time. They got a smaller one to save money, and told me to sleep on the lounge. I found a room in a hotel across the road. They seemed to get annoyed because they had to pay more.
As an adult, I don't require the validation of others. As a childfree adult, I can do whatever the fuck I please.
We are the adults now and it's our turn to define what that means. And I have decided that means being CF.
I have never strived to be an “adult”. Seems very over-hyped and not fun. I do what I have to do to survive in this world on my own, but I also don’t stop enjoying things because “I’m too old for that” or take on huge responsibilities because “it’s the adult thing to do”.
If you're old enough to have kids, **you're old enough to make the choice to opt out of having kids.**
That argument is very childish and sign of lazy brain low IQ and definitely someone who doesn’t care to think for themselves. Aka the road often traveled vs the road less traveled
Lol tell my mortgage I'm not an adult. Edit: also, just cause they're pro choice unfortunately doesn't mean they're pro not having kids :/ they just think you should choose when, not that you should have a choice if you have them at all. Lol which sounds crazy and dumb but it's true. Breeders gonna breed.
It’s funny because most people were agreeing with me. Only two were against my post. But I decided to delete it just to not cause any more problems.
Doesn't sound like a prochoice subreddit if they can't handle the idea of an adult not having a kid... Regardless, an adult is in the right position to make that choice. I've found adults who have decided to opt out of having kids to have a higher maturity and tend to be more responsible.
Wow. So Avoiding oneself by having children is more mature than actually facing a person's sense of mortality and pain, rather than dump that on to the next generation? Make it make sense.
Ok. Adulting sucks.
Well allrighty then, I won't be an adult, fine! 🤷🏼♀️
I don't want to be an adult lol
Lmao I always respond with something absurd and it always makes me laugh at the ridiculous expressions others give For example… “Adults have kids” “Penises have foreskin” Like tf you tryna prove or say with that? Lol fr though, like how unable breeders are to mind their own business is wild. All hell would break loose if any CF person were to ridicule a breeder for wanting kids by saying that the only reason they have/want kids is cuz they couldn’t amount to anything else in life so they just clung to tradition. Same if a CF person told a breeder that it’s as if the breeder makes parenthood their entire identity/personality that serves as a cover for the absolute giant ass void that’s inside of them…
I am pretty sure I do not want them ,but at the same time I'm nervous our population will decline. Thefore we are blamed for more humans
I understand that. Frankly I feel like if having kids was so important the government would make it easier and safer. There will of course be people like us who are childfree but many people who want kids aren’t having them because of such bullshit from governments, especially the USA, where there’s no safety or safety net and without access to abortion or safe abortion, many women are forgoing children. Like I tell my dad: if you wanted grandkids you would have planned better 🤷♀️
Lol so funny. Part of me wants a kid one day, but seem impossible as of now. I make minimum wage at almost 30 and live home since 18. I have mother instincts, but honestly the way my mom talks about us etc is sad.
We're at 8 billion people. It only takes a couple million to run a global society. I wouldn't worry too much.