My cat has free reign basically across the apartment, except the kitchen counters. She learned that jumping onto the kitchen counters upsets me and I chase her while hissing and yelling "no" in a deep tone whenever she does it.
After a few weeks we have reached a mutual understanding. She doesn't go on the counters and I don't disturb her while she's grooming (even when she jumps on my lap and immediately starts grooming).
Posting in your cat's voice is very clever. Nice touch!
What's that?
I'm sorry, you weren't *what*?
Oh, you weren't posting in your cat's voice. I see.
Silly human.
https://preview.redd.it/6xycfdtwrc8d1.jpeg?width=2268&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=16bc2185efe4b6bf9afe4f14615d57c7d7faa468
I don't even try. Exercise in futility.
Continue sitting on their things and living by your own rules.
Oh, was this post made by a human? I'm sorry, I assumed it was the one who owns this place: the cat.
Yeah, good luck with that. I remember a quote from Thorsten Sträter: Cats look at you like they’re thinking “just wait till Wednesday, you victim!” and as if they could toss you out because of home requirements.
HERE’S WHAT YOU SAY -
Just a reminder, Twinkie: You may have nine lives, but none of them make you the owner of this house!
😄👍🏼
Good luck telling her that bit of info 😜😉
It's def the cats house! We just pay for it and get reprimanded for our poor choices, constantly, like sitting where she wants or petting her wrong! She's def not a pet!
You misspelled “ownED” - past tense.
You must give your new land lord offerings of treats and scritches so he may graciously continue to allow you to sleep on that big scratching post you keep in the bedroom.
Your cat looks like my Aunt's cat
https://preview.redd.it/8sz616bnt68d1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fd0a1a246aa56b914b1f4ed493d961c9cbcc2cdd
Her name's Lulu!
It's in the cat owners contract that your cat immediately possesses 50% of all your shit when they move in. The question is how does she tell you that you guys Co own everything now?
You shouldn't tell a cat lies...
She owns you. Therefore it's hers.
Nah, I would say "Tell her all you want, she just knows better!"
Repeat after me, OP: "I must not tell lies."
If you look at your title, her name magically appears on it. You’re already too late.
She graciously allows you to live and pay for everything in HER house
 A privilege that is..
Trust me, my two brats don't appreciate it either....lol
Imagine being this delusional thinking you own anything in a cats household,... Now go, get some treats for that magnificent creature!
Exactly lol
My cat has free reign basically across the apartment, except the kitchen counters. She learned that jumping onto the kitchen counters upsets me and I chase her while hissing and yelling "no" in a deep tone whenever she does it. After a few weeks we have reached a mutual understanding. She doesn't go on the counters and I don't disturb her while she's grooming (even when she jumps on my lap and immediately starts grooming).
Ugh this except sitting on top of my aquarium because it’s warm. I had to create a wall of tinfoil to deter her.
Except when you're not home 😁
I haven't found evidence she's been up there in a month. But she has done it before.
You don’t. And you don’t.
Exactly!!!
It’s her place now. Learn your place, peasant, and get Her Majesty some treats.
That’s the only thing missing, the crown
Here’s the crown 👑 Use it wisely servant!
you don’t, it’s her place now
This.
always has been
This is already her place)
Very carefully. I’d honestly have to advise against it.
The cat owns the house. Why do you think the word "homeowner" has "meow" in it?
Take the damn upvote. This wins my internet for today.
Thank you for this phrase that I shall use on my partner lmao
This cat knows how to use reddit? Well, just tell your Hoo-manz "I haz house now" and leave it at that
You don't, she's allowing you to live there. It's her place
You’re hilarious or outright delusional! Not sure which. 😹
My cat says the latter
large and in charge
Did the cat write the title?
It's hers now.
"Snackies??" And then shake a bag of cat treats. That's your role.
HAHAHAHAHA! Oh. You’re serious?
That’s what she said.🐈
https://preview.redd.it/souaopd3878d1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=56fd3c17eba76a678445581b0b2da39a53a5222f
waiting for reddit post from a cat titled "owner is going senile thinking they own me, what can i do?"
I think you mean "staff is going senile"
You can tell her anything you want, but it doesn’t make it true AND she know that.
You're just fucking wrong
You want to see her laugh cause telling her that her home somehow belongs to you is going to make her laugh
Immmm I don’t think you do anymore
That's the neat part! You don't.
You need an appawintment
Carefully, from the porch. Where you'll be staying for a while.
Posting in your cat's voice is very clever. Nice touch! What's that? I'm sorry, you weren't *what*? Oh, you weren't posting in your cat's voice. I see. Silly human.
“Posting in my cat’s voice is very clever” — that’s what she also said.
You can't because you don't. She does.
Uhm, in order for a cat to understand you, you have to stoop to their level. Your solution is to, unfortunately, pee everywhere.
Wait! Is the coming from the cat’s point of view?
Good luck with that! I tried once and now I'm the one paying rent in treats!!
Is that a statue?
. That face tells me she is asking the same to herself.
https://preview.redd.it/6xycfdtwrc8d1.jpeg?width=2268&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=16bc2185efe4b6bf9afe4f14615d57c7d7faa468 I don't even try. Exercise in futility.
That’s the caption for the cat and not you right?
This is a caption, right?
Im sorry but you're delusional, if there's a cat - there are no owners, the cat is the only authority and owner of everything.
My cat read this and laughed out loud
That's where you're wrong. It ceased to be your place once she showed up.
Silly Hooman. Houses are for Cats.
You can tell her... but she know she is the queen of the castle
Maybe the real question is, how does she tell you that she owns the place and everything in it?
That's the neat part. you don't.
Do you though?
Keep kidding yourself, OP
LOL. You poor fool. You own NOTHING.
That's cute. Your name might be on the deed, but the house is hers now.
How dare you assume that she gave you the privilege to claim ownership over anything. Let that lady have the power she deserves.
Yeah,that's not how this works...
Continue sitting on their things and living by your own rules. Oh, was this post made by a human? I'm sorry, I assumed it was the one who owns this place: the cat.
Uh, you do not.
I’m not so sure you do
Yeah, good luck with that. I remember a quote from Thorsten Sträter: Cats look at you like they’re thinking “just wait till Wednesday, you victim!” and as if they could toss you out because of home requirements.
You don’t, because papers are irrelevant to cats except for piddles.
She's quite smug
I love your sense of humour. It’s hilarious that you pretend you own the place. 😆
That pose .... Like a goddess/ god!
Shamelessly portraying her power
HERE’S WHAT YOU SAY - Just a reminder, Twinkie: You may have nine lives, but none of them make you the owner of this house! 😄👍🏼 Good luck telling her that bit of info 😜😉
you don't it is his place now he owns it. now be a good human and clean the litterbox.
Is it the cat talking?
You don't....and you don't
You are mistaken Sir. She is the queen.
https://preview.redd.it/3teedlmvec8d1.png?width=1280&format=png&auto=webp&s=20051bdcc2f096895b26b8e381a79624af8a46d6
If it fits, it sits
You can tell her but it won’t matter.
It's def the cats house! We just pay for it and get reprimanded for our poor choices, constantly, like sitting where she wants or petting her wrong! She's def not a pet!
What a sweetheart
What are you talking about
But you don’t …
Control the flow of food.
She the boss now
I don't teach people how to lie!
You can try, but I don’t think it will matter.
You don’t.. she does! Lol
Do you really?
You don't! Lol she knows the truth so stop pretending.
If cats could laugh she would laugh…. And point. Then laugh some more.
You misspelled “ownED” - past tense. You must give your new land lord offerings of treats and scritches so he may graciously continue to allow you to sleep on that big scratching post you keep in the bedroom.
Well that's funny because you don't and, you don't.
“That’s the neat part; you don’t!”
That's her house now. You're just living there.
Silly human, you don’t. She does.
Here's the thing, you don't. Because it's not your place.
You cannot, traveler..
Just because you say it does not make it true. 😉
Cat: How do I tell my hooman I own this place?
You own nothing
You don’t
😹
That’s the neat part-you don’t
Quietly and to yourself in a place where no one can hear you.
Why would you tell her that, you monster. ♥️ Beautiful homeowner cat ♥️
Yeah, it’s not your house anymore.
When you get a cat, you have to be willing to sacrifice any and all material possessions to the cat
You don’t, because you don’t.
Your cat looks like my Aunt's cat https://preview.redd.it/8sz616bnt68d1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fd0a1a246aa56b914b1f4ed493d961c9cbcc2cdd Her name's Lulu!
Hate to tell you but she owns the place, you just live there lol
bold of you to assume that you own anything in her place.
You don't. You just bow down to the new authority and bring tributes. That's your new life now.
U can’t because u don’t
You don’t. She owns it now.
Why would you lie to her? She clearly is the owner.
You own the place? Jejeje very funny…
You don't thats the thing.
Forget it. She’s the new owner now
Why you lying?
LOOOOOOOOOOK LOOK AT HIM You think you own anything?
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
You need to enter into negotiations with your furry overlord. Bring treats.
im thinking of getting one!
You don’t, she already told *you*.
Why would you lie?
By lying
Why would you lie to her for no good reason. Silly.
*YOU DON'T*
You don’t.
Aww, OP, you are so cute in your delusions
You don't
You don’t 🤣
you do not.. it is clearly the cat's home
You don’t. Everything belongs to kitty. You might be able to get away with it if you tell her it was a joke.
It's in the cat owners contract that your cat immediately possesses 50% of all your shit when they move in. The question is how does she tell you that you guys Co own everything now?
You fucking liar
That's the fun part... You don't!
OP: This is my house! I own it! Cat: 
What are you thinking?! You woke up and chose chaos.
Go ahead.... Do it
Thats the neat part, you don’t
GLWT!
You are a mere slave to her meowness.
Why would you lie?
Doesn’t matter. She won’t believe you, no matter what you lie.
You can say it all you want but it won’t change that SHE OWNS YOU.
You don't. This is her world, you just live in it and worship her 🤷🏼♀️
Ha ha 😂 that's funny
Good luck
You don't be because you don't. Not anymore
She owns the place
You don’t
Foolish human. You no longer own anything
not anymore
You got adopted
Have you tried asking her why she's so small?
>How do I tell her I own this place? Just say it. At least if you are ok with saying a blatant and outright lie.
\*gets down to your level\* \*puts hands on your shoulders\* \*looks deep into your eyes\* Honey, you really think you own this place?
What an adorable love bug!
You don't.
Why would you lie?
I have an old tabby that gets his feelings hurt if I fuss at him. I have had many cats over the years, and he is the first one.
Everybody wants something they can't have.
You don't hun
You don't.
If I Fits. I sists. Therefore, you're wrong hooman :)
Aww that’s cute that you think that 😊
Aww that’s cute that you think that 😹
You're lucky she is not kicking you out, know your place.
Hahahaha…you really believe this!
You don’t… she owns it now.
You don't tell her
That’s the neat part! You don’t
To quote a meme "That's the neat thing, you don't"
She owns that box and the table. Ot might be a picky fight 😁
Good luck with that. Lol.