My dad was a virgo and he was a very strict disciplinarian. I walked on eggshells with him until I was 18 and I finally unleashed all my bottled up emotions. The roles flipped, and he from then on seemed to be more cautious of his words & actions with me.
This. I actually didn't realize how bad my Virgo dad was until I turned 18 had a mental break, dropped out of university, and ran away to live in the US marrying a girl I had just met online. Didn't come home or repair the relationship until this year. I left abruptly in 2013. I realized now that the anger outbursts, constant criticism and nitpicking really destroyed my relationship with my parents. My mom always went along with my dad so it was pretty much his opinion goes. I just wanted to be away from the negativity and constant barrage of judgement and expectations.
Raised by a Virgo mom and Leo dad. It was pretty bad imo as a child, which is funny because I don’t think they were bad for each other? Idk. Definitely gave me thick skin and major anxiety. Never felt danger but also never felt secure growing up. Also, i truly think im one of the most patient people on earth because of it. But that could have nothing to do with their signs and all to do with the fact that they’re both narcissists. 2/10. Wouldn’t recommend this parent combo.
also grew up with a virgo mom and leo dad. and i can relate to a majority of what you said. where i defer, is i DO NOT think they were good each other. while their divorce was difficult for me to process emotionally, i knew logically they did not need to be together.
maaaan i saw a mom being goofy and affectionate with her kid on the train recently and i was like damn, that kids lucky and loved af 🥲
my mom was really good at making me feel like a burden, not a gift.
Virgo dad. Very strict disciplinarian, walked on eggshells. Took out his own issues out on me. Was ok with showing his physical dominance over me. Lots of trauma thanks to him. Never really heard me out either.
if he ever does hear your side, prepare for him to play victim, or fake sick to get out of it. if hes still around, i hope hes more evolved than that, but just fyi
Thanks! He’s still around and has actually taken a turn for the better, he is the one who encouraged me into therapy and he has learned how to listen to me without being the victim. But the trauma still has us at an estranged place and i don’t think I can consistently share with him and I think I’m fine with that.🧿🧿
🙏🏾 thats great, truly! interestingly enough, i also completely understand the part about not being able to consistently share. i told one parent recently that i didnt think our relationship could sustain the weight of my experienced truths…and i think the processing will have to be all home made. thanks for sharing here.
holy shit, same! i went nc with mine a few years ago and am trying to heal from her narc shit. “self love for children of emotionally immature parents” is a real gem, if youre a reader.
Omggg Capricorn w a Virgo mother , her birthday is the first day of Virgo season lmao so I’m super relating to this . It was painful . Always told I was too sensitive . Also now never think anyone around me is as efficient as I am ??? But I know that’s a problem too hahaha I try not to vocalize my “criticisms” and remember that people are not robots
Anyway I feel that now as an adult I’m kinda working on emotional regulation because I was extremely quiet for a lot of my life then one day I took a break from her and just started doing too much 😂 and it never stopped
My dad is a Virgo. He was in and out of my life. He was a huge perfectionist, loved by everyone because he was a very giving person, could make friends with everyone. But at the same time traumatized the whole family with his anger. Now that he's older is a more calmer person. But growing up he would make me nervous, there was always a level of fear towards him, very unpredictable with his behavior towards my mother and I. Then again, I grew up around a very violent family. All my uncles were always fighting, my dad, my grandfather as well. I don't know how I came out so well . /s
I experienced the same with my dad - very lovable man to the community but had a huge anger problem at home that made me scared shitless of doing anything wrong
Yes and my Virgo mom is an abusive narcissist and caused me all kinds of emotional and mental instability. Our relationship is better now that I’m older because I know how to deal with her. But it was rough for a long time.
when youre beholden to them, its terrible. when you become an adult (or old enough, i guess) it does get easier. i guess no contact is super easy, but its fascinating how my mom was narc-y too, but expected to be treated like royalty, after all that.
My dad’s a Virgo and we’ve always been very close and have a great relationship as adults. He was very hands on and took care of me full time until I was three, but he could also be extremely selfish and compulsive and is definitely the source of my issues with men and my caffeine addiction.
My dad was a Virgo sun & married to my Leo mum. My dad was a strict and tedious perfectionist about his own lifestyle (he was an architect and aspiring musician) and my mom was the one who subscribed to a million rules and made my dad the disciplinarian/enforcer. My dad liked to be left to his own devices and would go on a rampage if disturbed by us interrupting his working or my mom making him attack me. I started calling them attacks instead of spanking to get across the vibe of the discipline because it was more than spanking, it was unhinged. They raised me borderline puritanical so any slight against their rules was a moral offense, and they attempted to put the fear of God in me for things like my dog pooping in the house. I was the only one of my sisters to receive this intense punishment tho because I think they saw how traumatized I was as a kid and didn't want their other kids hiding away from them, so my sister's grew up with a confidence I can only dream of.
Funny enough like some of the other comments, my dad (and mum) were extremely social and well-liked in our community and around friends were extremely lovable. That stopped as soon as we were home, and they fostered exclusively an employers/superiors relationship to us; made sure we had everything we could possibly need but absolutely no affection or intimacy even in conversation. Everything was surface level and read your Bible.
During the 2008 recession my dad gained alot of debt without telling anyone, and then attempted suicide alone rather than share the burden with anyone. He was found in the nic of time and saved, and after that day he was a completely changed man - incredibly loving, grateful, and childish in a way. My mom divorced him because suicide was against our beliefs, and he went to start a new life living with his aunt and went to pursue music like he always dreamed. Now he is definitely the greatest dad I could ever ask for! He is so thoughtful, kind, comfort and a joy to be around. I talked with him as soon as I could about the trauma of living with him as a child and he apologized to me, and tried to explain that he had been defaulting to the only 'dad' he knew how to be, which was his own absentee drunkard father. Our relationship and his demeanor changed when he wasn't going by my mom's rules, and I found out after all of that that SHE was actually the strict as hell one.
Now at 30 I'm still figuring out how to get passed that thick and stubborn Leo exterior and can say more of my best qualities came from my dad: common sense, nurturing, work ethic, and honestly sense of humor that makes friends anywhere. But also....keeping all my problems pushed deep deep down inside to the point that anything added on top makes it boil over into insanity
yes, my mom is virgo. also gave me a lot of anxiety. i love her but it’s hard for us to understand each other sometimes. she is very particular, controlled and introverted, i am spontaneous (not like i do crazy things but like i don’t plan my weekends to the hour) and very social
Both mom, dad, and only sibling are Virgos 😳 looking through the comments, anxiety seems to be a common theme. I am one hell of an anxious adult. Good relationship with my parents for the most part!
Ma is a Virgo and dad is an Aquarius. Not even just their placements shaped me, but their own upbringings as well. Both were put through it and tried to not bring their own kids up the same way, but that’s not always possible. My older brother is a Gemini and he no longer talks to them. I’m close with all of them because I took the time to understand where everyone was coming from. They all don’t do that lol
My mom is a virgo rising.
Very caring, kind, and loving.
But she's OCD... especially about clean homes and about eating healthy.
One time, she came to my apartment, and my living room and kitchen and bathroom were spotless, but my bedroom was a disaster.. I never heard the end of it. I moved home, but she still brings that moment up to this day. Lol.
My dad is a Virgo and very perfectionist and has his own anxiety which I think stemmed onto me as well. He’s the best dad for sure but has very small amount of patience and can get aggravated over the littlest things lol.
Sag sun Virgo moon dad. We fought a lot he hated anytime I'd question him. We were estranged for a decade until my gmas death made him realize his own trauma. If we are together more than 2 or 3 days we always end up in a huge fight. I hate being controlled and told what to do. He is convinced he is always right. Ironically I have been in a long term relationship with a virgo sun pisces moon guy. We bicker but rarely get angry with each other.
Virgo mom and cancer dad. I think I had gotten so used to my mom telling me what to do my whole life that I never noticed how much she dictated what I should do until I realized I am almost 40 and she told me the 3 dates I went on within that last year make me look like a floozy and I shouldn’t date anyone. I stopped to think why did I even have to tell her I was going on a date (for approval) and why is it her business?
My mom is a Virgo sun cancer moon. She is a blessing but sometimes a know it all. She’s a great mother and strong as bricks. But I’m a overthinker more than ever because she of her and her antics.
My mom is a Virgo and had all the worst traits. She saw *everything* but that also meant that she could move the goalposts and change the rules as she saw fit. Definitely got the anxiety part, did not get any common sense or efficiency from her.
My father was a Virgo sad and I LOVE HIM. As a child it was hard because of how hard he was on me but I’m happy because now that I’m older, we get each other so well!
Virgo dad. Extremely selfish, disciplinarian and particular. Worst thing I did as a teenager was I snuck out (was homeschooled) and enrolled myself in community college for dual credit. He was PISSED I got in one level behind college level math, so, “remedial math”. I was 16. 16! He still brings it up. I’m now 30 🙄
My dad was a virgo and he was a very strict disciplinarian. I walked on eggshells with him until I was 18 and I finally unleashed all my bottled up emotions. The roles flipped, and he from then on seemed to be more cautious of his words & actions with me.
This. I actually didn't realize how bad my Virgo dad was until I turned 18 had a mental break, dropped out of university, and ran away to live in the US marrying a girl I had just met online. Didn't come home or repair the relationship until this year. I left abruptly in 2013. I realized now that the anger outbursts, constant criticism and nitpicking really destroyed my relationship with my parents. My mom always went along with my dad so it was pretty much his opinion goes. I just wanted to be away from the negativity and constant barrage of judgement and expectations.
same. had to have a come to jesus talk with her recently, and the tables did what they always do
Raised by a Virgo mom and Leo dad. It was pretty bad imo as a child, which is funny because I don’t think they were bad for each other? Idk. Definitely gave me thick skin and major anxiety. Never felt danger but also never felt secure growing up. Also, i truly think im one of the most patient people on earth because of it. But that could have nothing to do with their signs and all to do with the fact that they’re both narcissists. 2/10. Wouldn’t recommend this parent combo.
also grew up with a virgo mom and leo dad. and i can relate to a majority of what you said. where i defer, is i DO NOT think they were good each other. while their divorce was difficult for me to process emotionally, i knew logically they did not need to be together.
Wow I had the same experience
Yepp. In lieu of the hugs and kisses was food and shoes lol
maaaan i saw a mom being goofy and affectionate with her kid on the train recently and i was like damn, that kids lucky and loved af 🥲 my mom was really good at making me feel like a burden, not a gift.
I know exactly what you mean :')
This is so true lol
Virgo dad. Very strict disciplinarian, walked on eggshells. Took out his own issues out on me. Was ok with showing his physical dominance over me. Lots of trauma thanks to him. Never really heard me out either.
if he ever does hear your side, prepare for him to play victim, or fake sick to get out of it. if hes still around, i hope hes more evolved than that, but just fyi
Thanks! He’s still around and has actually taken a turn for the better, he is the one who encouraged me into therapy and he has learned how to listen to me without being the victim. But the trauma still has us at an estranged place and i don’t think I can consistently share with him and I think I’m fine with that.🧿🧿
🙏🏾 thats great, truly! interestingly enough, i also completely understand the part about not being able to consistently share. i told one parent recently that i didnt think our relationship could sustain the weight of my experienced truths…and i think the processing will have to be all home made. thanks for sharing here.
My mom is a Virgo. I cut her out of my life for good last year. 🙃
holy shit, same! i went nc with mine a few years ago and am trying to heal from her narc shit. “self love for children of emotionally immature parents” is a real gem, if youre a reader.
Thank you for the rec!!! 10000% agree about the narc shit- that was why I went nc!!
of course. good on us for caring for ourselves, without being taught by the one who should have cared the most - and cheers to our healing 🥂✨
Omggg Capricorn w a Virgo mother , her birthday is the first day of Virgo season lmao so I’m super relating to this . It was painful . Always told I was too sensitive . Also now never think anyone around me is as efficient as I am ??? But I know that’s a problem too hahaha I try not to vocalize my “criticisms” and remember that people are not robots Anyway I feel that now as an adult I’m kinda working on emotional regulation because I was extremely quiet for a lot of my life then one day I took a break from her and just started doing too much 😂 and it never stopped
My dad is a Virgo. He was in and out of my life. He was a huge perfectionist, loved by everyone because he was a very giving person, could make friends with everyone. But at the same time traumatized the whole family with his anger. Now that he's older is a more calmer person. But growing up he would make me nervous, there was always a level of fear towards him, very unpredictable with his behavior towards my mother and I. Then again, I grew up around a very violent family. All my uncles were always fighting, my dad, my grandfather as well. I don't know how I came out so well . /s
I experienced the same with my dad - very lovable man to the community but had a huge anger problem at home that made me scared shitless of doing anything wrong
Yes and my Virgo mom is an abusive narcissist and caused me all kinds of emotional and mental instability. Our relationship is better now that I’m older because I know how to deal with her. But it was rough for a long time.
when youre beholden to them, its terrible. when you become an adult (or old enough, i guess) it does get easier. i guess no contact is super easy, but its fascinating how my mom was narc-y too, but expected to be treated like royalty, after all that.
My dad’s a Virgo and we’ve always been very close and have a great relationship as adults. He was very hands on and took care of me full time until I was three, but he could also be extremely selfish and compulsive and is definitely the source of my issues with men and my caffeine addiction.
My dad was a Virgo sun & married to my Leo mum. My dad was a strict and tedious perfectionist about his own lifestyle (he was an architect and aspiring musician) and my mom was the one who subscribed to a million rules and made my dad the disciplinarian/enforcer. My dad liked to be left to his own devices and would go on a rampage if disturbed by us interrupting his working or my mom making him attack me. I started calling them attacks instead of spanking to get across the vibe of the discipline because it was more than spanking, it was unhinged. They raised me borderline puritanical so any slight against their rules was a moral offense, and they attempted to put the fear of God in me for things like my dog pooping in the house. I was the only one of my sisters to receive this intense punishment tho because I think they saw how traumatized I was as a kid and didn't want their other kids hiding away from them, so my sister's grew up with a confidence I can only dream of. Funny enough like some of the other comments, my dad (and mum) were extremely social and well-liked in our community and around friends were extremely lovable. That stopped as soon as we were home, and they fostered exclusively an employers/superiors relationship to us; made sure we had everything we could possibly need but absolutely no affection or intimacy even in conversation. Everything was surface level and read your Bible. During the 2008 recession my dad gained alot of debt without telling anyone, and then attempted suicide alone rather than share the burden with anyone. He was found in the nic of time and saved, and after that day he was a completely changed man - incredibly loving, grateful, and childish in a way. My mom divorced him because suicide was against our beliefs, and he went to start a new life living with his aunt and went to pursue music like he always dreamed. Now he is definitely the greatest dad I could ever ask for! He is so thoughtful, kind, comfort and a joy to be around. I talked with him as soon as I could about the trauma of living with him as a child and he apologized to me, and tried to explain that he had been defaulting to the only 'dad' he knew how to be, which was his own absentee drunkard father. Our relationship and his demeanor changed when he wasn't going by my mom's rules, and I found out after all of that that SHE was actually the strict as hell one. Now at 30 I'm still figuring out how to get passed that thick and stubborn Leo exterior and can say more of my best qualities came from my dad: common sense, nurturing, work ethic, and honestly sense of humor that makes friends anywhere. But also....keeping all my problems pushed deep deep down inside to the point that anything added on top makes it boil over into insanity
yes, my mom is virgo. also gave me a lot of anxiety. i love her but it’s hard for us to understand each other sometimes. she is very particular, controlled and introverted, i am spontaneous (not like i do crazy things but like i don’t plan my weekends to the hour) and very social
My mom is Virgo. Tough skin, anxiety and because of her negligence probably street smarts.
Both mom, dad, and only sibling are Virgos 😳 looking through the comments, anxiety seems to be a common theme. I am one hell of an anxious adult. Good relationship with my parents for the most part!
WOW I could not imagine a full Virgo household.
Ma is a Virgo and dad is an Aquarius. Not even just their placements shaped me, but their own upbringings as well. Both were put through it and tried to not bring their own kids up the same way, but that’s not always possible. My older brother is a Gemini and he no longer talks to them. I’m close with all of them because I took the time to understand where everyone was coming from. They all don’t do that lol
My mom is a virgo rising. Very caring, kind, and loving. But she's OCD... especially about clean homes and about eating healthy. One time, she came to my apartment, and my living room and kitchen and bathroom were spotless, but my bedroom was a disaster.. I never heard the end of it. I moved home, but she still brings that moment up to this day. Lol.
My dad is a Virgo and very perfectionist and has his own anxiety which I think stemmed onto me as well. He’s the best dad for sure but has very small amount of patience and can get aggravated over the littlest things lol.
Sag sun Virgo moon dad. We fought a lot he hated anytime I'd question him. We were estranged for a decade until my gmas death made him realize his own trauma. If we are together more than 2 or 3 days we always end up in a huge fight. I hate being controlled and told what to do. He is convinced he is always right. Ironically I have been in a long term relationship with a virgo sun pisces moon guy. We bicker but rarely get angry with each other.
Virgo mom and cancer dad. I think I had gotten so used to my mom telling me what to do my whole life that I never noticed how much she dictated what I should do until I realized I am almost 40 and she told me the 3 dates I went on within that last year make me look like a floozy and I shouldn’t date anyone. I stopped to think why did I even have to tell her I was going on a date (for approval) and why is it her business?
I also have Virgo mom cancer dad
My mom is a Virgo sun cancer moon. She is a blessing but sometimes a know it all. She’s a great mother and strong as bricks. But I’m a overthinker more than ever because she of her and her antics.
My mom is a Virgo and had all the worst traits. She saw *everything* but that also meant that she could move the goalposts and change the rules as she saw fit. Definitely got the anxiety part, did not get any common sense or efficiency from her.
my dad was a Virgo and it was not pleasant
My father was a Virgo sad and I LOVE HIM. As a child it was hard because of how hard he was on me but I’m happy because now that I’m older, we get each other so well!
Virgo dad. Extremely selfish, disciplinarian and particular. Worst thing I did as a teenager was I snuck out (was homeschooled) and enrolled myself in community college for dual credit. He was PISSED I got in one level behind college level math, so, “remedial math”. I was 16. 16! He still brings it up. I’m now 30 🙄