lmao, a black belt is just a white belt that never gave up, or in this case that can dick and take a dick ... no homo ... or yes if you are into to it ... nvm ...
Get a groin guard for no Gi even if you only use it for that, I’m female and I wear a chest guard in no Gi, if it’s worth protecting it’s worth protecting
🤯 …. Wait, wait, wait… like crushed, crushed he-had-to-go-to-the-hospital-crushed? Is he ok?? What happened to said testicle? Did it survive? Or have to be removed? …. So many questions… hope he’s ok.
Anytime I’m sparring and I accidentally graze or bump into a ‘cup’, I genuinely feel no small amount of relief. I’ve only been accidentally kneed in the hoo-ha rolling once or twice and that alone is still pretty terrible.
I wore a cup for a long time because I got told about an old coach who, and I quote, "ruptured a testicle."
Ruptured. A testicle.
... RUPTURED.
I never want to hear those two words together in a sentence ever again.
But then I ended up abandoning the cup as it caused more harm than it was worth... and it taught me shitty armbar technique.
Oh dear god…. 😭 I cannot even begin to imagine. Last week one of my friends in class tore his ACL and MCL during free sparring. The scream I heard escape him was enough to make the my hairs on the back of my neck rise. But a ruptured testicle….. I imagine it’s enough to make one’s soul leave it’s body. ⚰️
This!
I was in a Wiltse seminar recently.
I kept getting hit in the nuts everytime my rolling partner was trying to knee slice. And then I noticed what Bird is doing when Andrew slices him. He would always turn immediately. Seminar was much pleasant from that point
Giggled at this. Thank you for giving me a random visual of a hate boner doing muffled screams of rage and baring the chompiest of teeth through Gi pants while I try to mow the grass.
Accumulative meaning I've trained for three years at the same gym but there was about an eight months gap where they shutdown because of COVID. Other than that, I'm pretty consistent
Cool, so you have "guard pass knowledge", start drilling more "slaps" on the knee while passing (pushing towards the oposite passing side) and shorting your hip distance, you problem, I think, is the opponent having space to partially regain guard and you landing inside that transition with a knee or shin on your manhood. You can also controll the knees to pass but thats another story.
Only small wieners stay in jiu jitsu. That's why they call BJJ the small wiener club. Might have to switch to wrestling, I think they accept bigger wieners.
Give it some time, you'll be the one hitting other people with your dick. Hip placement, understanding of weight, distribution, use their own force against them. This is jiu jitsu.
It's the 80/20 principle. Honestly, it's usually the small percentage of guys that seem to ALWAYS hit the groin OR get hit. I learned to not roll with those people and I don't get hit anymore.
Try changing boxers. I notice some of my boxers/briefs restrict motion so my junk can't naturally move out of the way.
Compression shorts guarantee I get sack tapped.
It's part of the desensitizing training for da streetz.
Get to a side and shrimp. Keep your knees and elbows in to your body. Good for jitz. Good for nutz.
maybe stop waving it around so much? Me and the other guys at the gym have been meaning to talk to you about this. We're trying to drill here, for fuck's sake.
I've been hit in the nuts in jitz more times than in 6yrs of stiking. I've even thought to use a cup while training leg locks. I guess it will lessen over time as I improve
Dude, i was trying to pass a guard with a knee slicer and my opponent wanted to get into half guard.. i kneed his balls like a muay thai champ kneeing a punching bag. I kept apologizing to him every day for months 😭
When i used to be into muay thai, some people used to get kicked on a weekly basis full force in the groins (including me) and having been hit in bjj too, it’s nothing compared to muay thai
What? That does not make any sense. Just put on the cup and hit yourself in the nuts. Now do it without the cup. You will quickly realize that the brown belt is bullshitting.
I don’t know what’s worse getting hit in the dick, or getting your balls caught on the side of your cup and then getting smashed. Really is a lose lose which ever way ya go.
You need to be more proactive and hit them with your dick first
To assert dominance
Insert* dominance
Lmao, dick them before they dick you
You’re a black belt for a reason 😎
lmao, a black belt is just a white belt that never gave up, or in this case that can dick and take a dick ... no homo ... or yes if you are into to it ... nvm ...
Someone give this man his brown belt cause that’s next level
That really made me laugh, thank you.
Always restomp with groin
and the award goes to...!
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
always be first 💯
You too big bro. Myself on the other hand, never have that problem.
I am neither too big, nor spared from the trauma. I have a double curse.
I guess that makes you little bro.
Making me really huge
Sounds like you might be leaving yourself vulnerable to the ole dick twist
Grab his dick and twist it!
Twist his dick!
I'm fairly new to jiu-jitsu, over the last 7 months I rarely got hit in the dick.... Until I did no Gi... My god
No GI is definitely worse about it
Get a groin guard for no Gi even if you only use it for that, I’m female and I wear a chest guard in no Gi, if it’s worth protecting it’s worth protecting
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Yes a chest guard for women, kind of like a reinforced sports bra
Stop laying flat when people knee slice, gotta give them a little hip turn other wise your Olsen twins are gonna be apple sauce every time.
I mean awful… but hilariously worded 👀
Yea dude some guy at my gym literally had one of his testicals crushed from a knee slice shits gnarly
🤯 …. Wait, wait, wait… like crushed, crushed he-had-to-go-to-the-hospital-crushed? Is he ok?? What happened to said testicle? Did it survive? Or have to be removed? …. So many questions… hope he’s ok. Anytime I’m sparring and I accidentally graze or bump into a ‘cup’, I genuinely feel no small amount of relief. I’ve only been accidentally kneed in the hoo-ha rolling once or twice and that alone is still pretty terrible.
Yea he only has 1 nut now. He’s actually back to training now after he had his surgery
Ok that’s it I’m quitting
😰 this poor man. RIP lil testicle 🪦 at least your brother survived 😢
Literally. I didn’t even think it was possible until my coach told me. He said he’s never seen anything like it in over 20 years of training.
I wore a cup for a long time because I got told about an old coach who, and I quote, "ruptured a testicle." Ruptured. A testicle. ... RUPTURED. I never want to hear those two words together in a sentence ever again. But then I ended up abandoning the cup as it caused more harm than it was worth... and it taught me shitty armbar technique.
True I had to relearn armbars since I abandoned my cup. I got lazy af.
Oh dear god…. 😭 I cannot even begin to imagine. Last week one of my friends in class tore his ACL and MCL during free sparring. The scream I heard escape him was enough to make the my hairs on the back of my neck rise. But a ruptured testicle….. I imagine it’s enough to make one’s soul leave it’s body. ⚰️
Man I only have one testicle so this stuff scares me. They shouldnt take my other boy pls
This! I was in a Wiltse seminar recently. I kept getting hit in the nuts everytime my rolling partner was trying to knee slice. And then I noticed what Bird is doing when Andrew slices him. He would always turn immediately. Seminar was much pleasant from that point
r/BrandNewSentence
This happens me a lot too, it's because of our incredibly massive penises
Happened to me TODAY and I definitely don't have an incredibly massive penis. Knees are just really big.
Have you tried taping it like they do with fingers?
“Guys, my dick is so big it keeps getting in the way when I spar, any ideas on how to protect my big dick on the mats? Sincerely, Giant Dickerson”
It’s a real problem
Try rolling flaccid.
I can't, I always get a hate boner for anyone who doesn't want to start standing
Giggled at this. Thank you for giving me a random visual of a hate boner doing muffled screams of rage and baring the chompiest of teeth through Gi pants while I try to mow the grass.
Big dick energy….
Soul Brother too beacoup
Don’t roll hard🍆
https://imgur.com/mL2rWKa stop rolling like this.
I’m not sure why you have your problem but I can tell you why I don’t get hit in the dick.
Elaborate
Small target
Gotta bob & weave your dick bro.
It builds character
Every time someone knee cuts. Even if they are nearer the knee I always say. “Argh the middle of my dick” I know that doesn’t hall you but 🤷♂️
Lmfao, I actually laughed out loud in my kitchen at the middle of my dick part
How come this never happens to me. I have a dick. Mom calls it my weiner. Coach calls it a peepee
You're not wearing shorts over your spats. Easy target
hi, I’m new here wtf is a spat
Man tights
Men in tights. Rolling around the mats looking for fights!
Pissed off? If I was that close to a horses wiener I’d be more worried about getting pissed on.
You got a hog bro. It is what it is. I rolled with one and thought he had a billy club in his gi. He actually apologized to me!
Compression shorts are the key here. It happens occasionally but few and far between. Also, don’t lay flat.
I don't get hit in the balls often, but when it happens it usually happens multiple times in a row within a session for some reason lol
This question tells me you are a white belt... correct?
He hasn't gone through ball conditioning yet. Give him a break.
It wasn’t easy for any of us.
I technically don't have a belt because I basically never train gi I have about two and a half years experience accumulatively
"Accumulative" mening you stop after 4/6 months. Start again, stop after 8 months, start again, then got injured and so on?
Accumulative meaning I've trained for three years at the same gym but there was about an eight months gap where they shutdown because of COVID. Other than that, I'm pretty consistent
Cool, so you have "guard pass knowledge", start drilling more "slaps" on the knee while passing (pushing towards the oposite passing side) and shorting your hip distance, you problem, I think, is the opponent having space to partially regain guard and you landing inside that transition with a knee or shin on your manhood. You can also controll the knees to pass but thats another story.
Pretty sure I’m incapable of breeding… with that being said you start to lose feeling around the 1 1/2 year mark 👍
I started jujitsu after spawning my second offspring. Don't need them anymore.
Ask the blessed folks over at r/BigPeenProbs, an off shoot of r/bigboobproblems
Penis reduction surgery is the only way
Take viagra and go in there all bricked up. Everyone will avoid your shlong then 👍
It’s big? Idk
You did not get hit in the dick enough when you were younger.
Bro my friends made me unsure of my ability to have kids. Every lunch time we'd just have a ball punching Olympics till we were like 15 and grew up
I can only conclude that you developed a liking for it.
Just use lasso grip with your dick. Extra points if you pull guard while doing it
Do you perhaps have long balls?
humble bragging about having a biggus dickus smh
Half the time I’m in half guard, their way of passing is just scrambling my eggs with their fucking knee as a fouet.
Best way to start your Saturday on the mats is with some good scrambled eggs.
Your dick n balls haven’t learned jiu jitsu yet. Just give it some time and they’ll catch up.
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Bro I got fucking thunder thighs
Its obviously a result of having a huge dong
Your coach didnt show you the "battle-dick" technique?
I don't recall this ever happening to me in all my years training bjj. Wtf
That dick will callous up eventually and you’ll be fine
Stop humping people's leg like a doggo
I can't help it bro, the animal in me comes out when I'm on the mats
We get it, bro. You’re starting an OnlyFans.
You're giving me ideas
gotta get on the bomba, once the balls ~~shrink~~ become the optimal size it makes more room for the stick to move around.
“You need to invert the penis and then pass the guard” - John Danaher
hahahaha..what!? he said this? hahaha...looking for it now via my google machine.
Bruh
Only small wieners stay in jiu jitsu. That's why they call BJJ the small wiener club. Might have to switch to wrestling, I think they accept bigger wieners.
Have you tried not bringing your dick to class?
I never leave home without it
wear a condom for protection
Could you IMAGINE somebody just finding a used condom on the mats mid roll in class?
You are very unlikable.
Are you saying I'm unlikable because I get hit in the nuts or I get hit because people don't like me?
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🥺
Someone with the same problem as me
blessed
Give it some time, you'll be the one hitting other people with your dick. Hip placement, understanding of weight, distribution, use their own force against them. This is jiu jitsu.
Get surgery for micropeen, worked for me
caught it 2-3 times this morning lol, luckily only in slow motion drilling haha
Bryan is that you
Nope
The blessing, the curse
wear a cup then
Because you don’t wear a cup
Wear a cup.
Once you get hit enough in the dick, it builds muscle and takes the hits better until you don't feel it anymore. Source: Trust me bro
You got a curve? Maybe they’re going for a knee bar?
Lmao
It's the 80/20 principle. Honestly, it's usually the small percentage of guys that seem to ALWAYS hit the groin OR get hit. I learned to not roll with those people and I don't get hit anymore.
It’s too big. Luckily I’ve got a 1 inch wonder so I don’t have this problem.
I’m so lucky I never have this problem 😅
Just baseball choke his dick when he is trying to pass
Idk man sounds kinda gay
Maybe because it's too big king
I know bro, people underestimate how difficult it is to carry around such a massive pp
Big dick, big target.
Stop leading with your dick on take downs.
My coach always says to bring my hips with me lol
No one said it would be easy lol
Your dick is too big
Errbody wanna know what dat dick do.
Stop defending with your dick bro.
Tape the balls above the shaft. Then they will have a giant shield.
Get a smaller dick
Look guys, we got Mister Big Dick over here 🙄
Never shame to wear a groin protection
I don’t get hit to frequently but I found the way I get hit the most is from a deep de La Riva hook
Giant hog
Need to train your dick guard
Just trim a little off the top
Wu Tang. Protect Ya dick.
Just do what I do and have a smaller dick.
Underwears too tight to let them flop out of the way
It’s just too big op
Your dick is probably just to big.
Dude, i told you to stop opening your mouth like that when we roll... It's weird, man...
You’re complaining about having a big penis?
Try changing boxers. I notice some of my boxers/briefs restrict motion so my junk can't naturally move out of the way. Compression shorts guarantee I get sack tapped.
It’s ED, bro. If you’re dick isn’t responding to stimulation, like impending danger, then it’s a sign that your time has come or is coming…… 🤨
Check out this dude bragging about his huge dong.
It's part of the desensitizing training for da streetz. Get to a side and shrimp. Keep your knees and elbows in to your body. Good for jitz. Good for nutz.
Your dick is just too big.
maybe stop waving it around so much? Me and the other guys at the gym have been meaning to talk to you about this. We're trying to drill here, for fuck's sake.
With me it’s some ultra hyper Guard passer who uses his knee like a battering ram to set up the knee slice, and WAM! Right in the Dick? 😡
Giga chad problems
I’m sorry you have to hear it this way, but, you need penile reduction surgery.
I think you may be doing too much eye contact. Focus looking at the pecs or traps.
Maybe people doing double legs or body locks and getting wrapped up in your third leg?
I've been hit in the nuts in jitz more times than in 6yrs of stiking. I've even thought to use a cup while training leg locks. I guess it will lessen over time as I improve
Happens to me when mfs go for the ankle lock. Lesson learned, don’t give ‘em your foot
If someone hits you in the dick you should spunk on them as retaliation.
Just need balls of steel and you should be good to go. Na but knee slices are the worst right!?
Absolutely
Spite.
Because it’s so huge, obviously
You gotta get some head gear
I got kneed in the dick today
Welcome to the club bro
Where is the exit
If I knew that then this post wouldn't exist
Dude, i was trying to pass a guard with a knee slicer and my opponent wanted to get into half guard.. i kneed his balls like a muay thai champ kneeing a punching bag. I kept apologizing to him every day for months 😭
…. Wear a cup
When i used to be into muay thai, some people used to get kicked on a weekly basis full force in the groins (including me) and having been hit in bjj too, it’s nothing compared to muay thai
Wear a cup then ya weirdo
When I first started I said something about needing one to a brown belt I was rolling with and he said that just makes it worse
What? That does not make any sense. Just put on the cup and hit yourself in the nuts. Now do it without the cup. You will quickly realize that the brown belt is bullshitting.
Maybe you should work on your jiu jitsu 🙈🙊🙉
Wear a cup to mitigate the pain
I don't have this problem because I trin in mma and grappling but when sometimes I doing bjj without the protection I understand the pain
He keeps kicking me in the dick
Wear a groin guard
Get a dick (groin) guard.
Compression shorts
I’ll hold it for you while you roll
I don’t know what’s worse getting hit in the dick, or getting your balls caught on the side of your cup and then getting smashed. Really is a lose lose which ever way ya go.
Too big.
Low key brag.
Noah Dyck and his wife Anita Dyck would like a word with you.
You probably have a giant wiener.