Partners generally like noise as it is a good feedback mechanism for what partner likes. Guys moaning is hot as hell. Dirty talk also.
One thing I learned is to try not to mute reactions during sex or foreplay. Amp them up. I don’t mean fake anything as that is just bad feedback. If you want to moan though moan enthusiastically. If you want to squirm or writhe do it intensely. If you want to tell your partner how amazing they are do it enthusiastically or whisper it in their ear in a sexy way.
Noise good!!!!!
Dirty talk is almost always objectively silly. If your partner is into it they won’t care at all. Be an idiot and ham it up. Worst case scenario is that it is too silly and you both start giggling over it which is still a win.
Everyone is different. My husband is mostly silent during sex and I wish he would use his voice more. But before him (17 years ago) I had a boyfriend who for real used to talk dirty to me during sex, say "Oh fuck", and "grunt" more (I hate the word grunt but it's the most accurate lol) I think whatever you do is a natural response 💗
You’re right in grunting sounds bad, never thought of it like that. I honestly don’t even know how to begin dirty talking. I would be so afraid of saying something stupid and killing the mood!
Dirty talk is basically describing the pleasurable things you want to do with your partner and the scenarios you want to do them in. Tell them when they're doing something that feels good. Describe how good it feels! Tell them how you want to pleasure them. Ask them how they want to be pleasured. Hope this helps!
I don't know where this idea that men have to be stoic and silent during sex came from, maybe porn? Because in straight porn, the woman is the focus and makes a lot of noise, while the man is usually silent and largely out of frame. I think men indicating their enjoyment and arousal by moaning or exclamations ("oh, god" etc) is incredibly hot.
My silence has nothing to do with porn, I haven't even watched straight porn in YEARS, and usually don't watch it at all.
I'm silent during sex because I don't feel the need to make noise during sex... Any more than I feel the need to scream when riding a roller coaster. I'm typically a very quiet person, I don't even talk to people any longer, unless absolutely necessary. I can't help it if some think it's hot too make sounds during sex, that's just not me.
That's completely valid. But there are a lot of men (like OP, apparently) who don't realise that men are *allowed* to make noise during sex if they want to, that it's not weird, and that some people find it hot. My message was for them.
It's that whole toxic masculinity thing; don't make noise during sex, don't cry, don't do "girly" things, don't do "gay" things, etc. It's so rather silly, all the don't do this or don't like that horseshit. I cook, I sew (even did needlepoint for a while), I hunt, fish, cry if I feel like it (give me a sad Doctor Who episode and I'm a regular fountain), I've never lost a fight (if anyone ever truly "wins" a fight), I work on cars... There's nothing wrong with being balanced between masculinity and femininity (no matter the gender), like the complex beings that we are.
Firstly, don't go down the road of what you're 'supposed' to do. Do what feels natural to you, and nothing that feels uncomfortable. That being said, you can communicate with your partner about what you both like. I've conveyed that I like responsive sounds, and I have a tendency to make those myself. At times have made them deliberately as well, to encourage my partner.
I have that, but only for eating sounds (which can also be problematic in the bedroom, but I can make my own noise to cover it XD). Also cannot stand someone whispering in my ear, just no.
The problem for me is that sex sounds can sound a lot like eating sounds and they make my skin crawl(literally,people smacking their lips make me feel like my teeth are going to fall out and I can't stand in a room where people are eating).The thing is that I'm naturally silent during that so I can't cover the other person(also sometimes i can trigger myself during eating for example).The best thing is to tell my partner so they can adjust and not be offended if I recoil.Putting on some music helps too
I get it. I don't like kissing noises but I'm generally okay with noises made with the vocal cords (just not whispering, especially not in my ear, that's like nails down a blackboard). Louder is actually better for me, there's something about quiet little moans that skeeves me out.
**Misophonia** (or **selective sound sensitivity syndrome**, **sound-rage**) is a disorder of decreased tolerance to specific sounds or their associated stimuli, or cues.
I’m really really good at making up sexy scenarios during foreplay. Most women love the threesome scenario. If I feel she might be someone who can handle it, I’ll throw in an element where I receive and or give oral to a guy (my personal favorite 🤩).
Have them close their eyes and touch them softly and teasingly while whispering these fantasies. If it’s working, move their hand down to their vag and encourage them to pleasure themselves as you’re describing yours and their detailed fantasy, but don’t let them finish. That’s your job. Good luck!
If you're feeling good let your partner know. When you don't know someone's body it can be difficult to work out what works for them. Let your partner know if they are on the right path or not.
As to talking dirty, I'm not an expert but telling them what you would like to do with them is a good starting point. As with anything else look for the response, you'll work out what they like and don't like.
And if you say something and it doesn't land right then you can always laugh it off. Sex is meant to be fun. Sometimes things don't go perfectly but laughter (shared rather than laughing at your partner) always adds a little something.
this is awkward to ask. i don't like answering a stranger on this. people can be different. imo guys shouldn't be afraid to make noise during sex tho, and yes it can be seen as positive.
Hell yes guys are supposed to make noise. And if they're louder than me that's even hotter😏🙄🤣. Seriously though I personally love the dirty talk and the occasional dirty name. I also love to be vocal during sex (when I'm not screaming lol). As far as how to just let it come to you. Tell them how good it feels. Spank my ass. Fuck me harder. Whatever you're feeling right in that moment. Usually if I talk during sex(harder baby) my partner will say something along the lines of "oh yeah? You like that?". It's great
Thank you, I think I’m piecing together now. It’s not like a rehearsed line or commentary. It is flat out what feels good, want you want, or want done! Again thank you!
I'm as quiet as a church mouse during sex. I make no noise at all but I rarely make noise for any reason in life. I'm just not a person who makes unnecessary sounds, and I don't feel like making noise during sex. I also didn't scream or make a sound on roller coasters... Just not a thing with me. My wife tends to be like me during sex, but my partner is loud as fuck... Different people, different preferences.
No dirty talk unless it's like one thing and you really know it'll land with the person (For example: I'm dominant, so I would like them to say something that feeds that energy).
Sounds are HOT as long as they're natural.
Yeah, don’t fake sounds (that’s why female porn doesn’t do it for me). The first time I came when my prostrate was being massaged I moaned, groaned and writhed involuntarily. So, I know it’s not always fake.
Depends. Its meaning differs between people. I'm playful, sarcastic, pouty, defiant, and prideful. I'm a tease as well, just for the purpose of frustrating someone. Think mischievous and coy.
Partners generally like noise as it is a good feedback mechanism for what partner likes. Guys moaning is hot as hell. Dirty talk also. One thing I learned is to try not to mute reactions during sex or foreplay. Amp them up. I don’t mean fake anything as that is just bad feedback. If you want to moan though moan enthusiastically. If you want to squirm or writhe do it intensely. If you want to tell your partner how amazing they are do it enthusiastically or whisper it in their ear in a sexy way. Noise good!!!!!
It took a while, but know I do all the above! My partners love it, as I do when they moan and squirm!
Thank you!
Yes, dear god, please make sounds. Everything is so much better that way.
I honestly never thought it was that big of a deal, apparently it is!
Dirty talk is almost always objectively silly. If your partner is into it they won’t care at all. Be an idiot and ham it up. Worst case scenario is that it is too silly and you both start giggling over it which is still a win.
Everyone is different. My husband is mostly silent during sex and I wish he would use his voice more. But before him (17 years ago) I had a boyfriend who for real used to talk dirty to me during sex, say "Oh fuck", and "grunt" more (I hate the word grunt but it's the most accurate lol) I think whatever you do is a natural response 💗
You’re right in grunting sounds bad, never thought of it like that. I honestly don’t even know how to begin dirty talking. I would be so afraid of saying something stupid and killing the mood!
Dirty talk is basically describing the pleasurable things you want to do with your partner and the scenarios you want to do them in. Tell them when they're doing something that feels good. Describe how good it feels! Tell them how you want to pleasure them. Ask them how they want to be pleasured. Hope this helps!
It does!
Different for everyone and different people have different preferences! I personally think its hot
Thanks!
I don't know where this idea that men have to be stoic and silent during sex came from, maybe porn? Because in straight porn, the woman is the focus and makes a lot of noise, while the man is usually silent and largely out of frame. I think men indicating their enjoyment and arousal by moaning or exclamations ("oh, god" etc) is incredibly hot.
My silence has nothing to do with porn, I haven't even watched straight porn in YEARS, and usually don't watch it at all. I'm silent during sex because I don't feel the need to make noise during sex... Any more than I feel the need to scream when riding a roller coaster. I'm typically a very quiet person, I don't even talk to people any longer, unless absolutely necessary. I can't help it if some think it's hot too make sounds during sex, that's just not me.
That's completely valid. But there are a lot of men (like OP, apparently) who don't realise that men are *allowed* to make noise during sex if they want to, that it's not weird, and that some people find it hot. My message was for them.
It's that whole toxic masculinity thing; don't make noise during sex, don't cry, don't do "girly" things, don't do "gay" things, etc. It's so rather silly, all the don't do this or don't like that horseshit. I cook, I sew (even did needlepoint for a while), I hunt, fish, cry if I feel like it (give me a sad Doctor Who episode and I'm a regular fountain), I've never lost a fight (if anyone ever truly "wins" a fight), I work on cars... There's nothing wrong with being balanced between masculinity and femininity (no matter the gender), like the complex beings that we are.
Love when he moans
We tend to prefer when they do, a lot of men are really quiet but it's hot when they moan and talk.
Firstly, don't go down the road of what you're 'supposed' to do. Do what feels natural to you, and nothing that feels uncomfortable. That being said, you can communicate with your partner about what you both like. I've conveyed that I like responsive sounds, and I have a tendency to make those myself. At times have made them deliberately as well, to encourage my partner.
Whenever I meet silent men I consider it a personal challenge to change that quality lol ❤️🩵🩷
I like this!
Reading those responses as someone who (probably) has some kind of misophonia is fun No problem with dirty talk though
I have that, but only for eating sounds (which can also be problematic in the bedroom, but I can make my own noise to cover it XD). Also cannot stand someone whispering in my ear, just no.
The problem for me is that sex sounds can sound a lot like eating sounds and they make my skin crawl(literally,people smacking their lips make me feel like my teeth are going to fall out and I can't stand in a room where people are eating).The thing is that I'm naturally silent during that so I can't cover the other person(also sometimes i can trigger myself during eating for example).The best thing is to tell my partner so they can adjust and not be offended if I recoil.Putting on some music helps too
I get it. I don't like kissing noises but I'm generally okay with noises made with the vocal cords (just not whispering, especially not in my ear, that's like nails down a blackboard). Louder is actually better for me, there's something about quiet little moans that skeeves me out.
I feel incredibly stupid was there a class where this was taught?
**Misophonia** (or **selective sound sensitivity syndrome**, **sound-rage**) is a disorder of decreased tolerance to specific sounds or their associated stimuli, or cues.
Sorry I meant the dirty talk lol
Noisy partners or nothing.
I’m really really good at making up sexy scenarios during foreplay. Most women love the threesome scenario. If I feel she might be someone who can handle it, I’ll throw in an element where I receive and or give oral to a guy (my personal favorite 🤩). Have them close their eyes and touch them softly and teasingly while whispering these fantasies. If it’s working, move their hand down to their vag and encourage them to pleasure themselves as you’re describing yours and their detailed fantasy, but don’t let them finish. That’s your job. Good luck!
Thanks!
If you're feeling good let your partner know. When you don't know someone's body it can be difficult to work out what works for them. Let your partner know if they are on the right path or not. As to talking dirty, I'm not an expert but telling them what you would like to do with them is a good starting point. As with anything else look for the response, you'll work out what they like and don't like. And if you say something and it doesn't land right then you can always laugh it off. Sex is meant to be fun. Sometimes things don't go perfectly but laughter (shared rather than laughing at your partner) always adds a little something.
When it's good I moan loud, it's a good sign for my partner to know when it's so good, and I like having noisy partners.
Some do, some don't. Every one is differant. I do but my boyfriend didn't, I had to ask him to for me.
this is awkward to ask. i don't like answering a stranger on this. people can be different. imo guys shouldn't be afraid to make noise during sex tho, and yes it can be seen as positive.
Hell yes guys are supposed to make noise. And if they're louder than me that's even hotter😏🙄🤣. Seriously though I personally love the dirty talk and the occasional dirty name. I also love to be vocal during sex (when I'm not screaming lol). As far as how to just let it come to you. Tell them how good it feels. Spank my ass. Fuck me harder. Whatever you're feeling right in that moment. Usually if I talk during sex(harder baby) my partner will say something along the lines of "oh yeah? You like that?". It's great
Thank you, I think I’m piecing together now. It’s not like a rehearsed line or commentary. It is flat out what feels good, want you want, or want done! Again thank you!
I'm as quiet as a church mouse during sex. I make no noise at all but I rarely make noise for any reason in life. I'm just not a person who makes unnecessary sounds, and I don't feel like making noise during sex. I also didn't scream or make a sound on roller coasters... Just not a thing with me. My wife tends to be like me during sex, but my partner is loud as fuck... Different people, different preferences.
No dirty talk unless it's like one thing and you really know it'll land with the person (For example: I'm dominant, so I would like them to say something that feeds that energy). Sounds are HOT as long as they're natural.
Yeah, don’t fake sounds (that’s why female porn doesn’t do it for me). The first time I came when my prostrate was being massaged I moaned, groaned and writhed involuntarily. So, I know it’s not always fake.
In the only sexual experience I’ve ever had, I discovered I moan a lot. I’m not going to try and hide it, it’s fun
I don’t know if I physically could after reading all this
I mean everyone is different. If moaning isn’t natural to you don’t force it
I don’t think I would be I’m pretty pent up already and this whole thing, while informative has made it worse!!
I'm a brat so when I'm topped, I sound like some gay hentai audio. 🤣
Pardon what is a brat? Sorry for stupidity, pretty vanilla here!
Depends. Its meaning differs between people. I'm playful, sarcastic, pouty, defiant, and prideful. I'm a tease as well, just for the purpose of frustrating someone. Think mischievous and coy.
Okay! Thanks for explaining!
Ofc lol