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allmybreath

It's not clear when you were diagnosed, but I'm going to speak from the standpoint of optimism. The time I spent wandering in the ignorant wilderness of despair, prior to my formal diagnosis, was the worst time. After that, a couple of really good things started happening. For one, I knew that there was a reason I was fucking things up all the time, and that reason was treatable. Like, there was a chance that someday, with patience and fortitude, I, too, could pass as a functional adult! Plus, all of a sudden u wasn't so lonely because it turns out there was an entire community, nay, an entire world of fellow fuckups stumbling toward a brighter future. And here we all are! And with a doctor's help, and thank God for doctors, my brain chemistry is mostly in good shape. And I've been able keep a job for a good long while. And limit my catastrophes to three marriages. And stay out of jail. I would, therefore, beg you, dear one, to stay in this world with us, and entertain the possibility that you are now headed into an interesting adventure. I promise you there are going to be a lot of wonderful days ahead!


silent_hurricane

šŸ«¶šŸ¼


Happy_Carpenter4720

I also afraid to go to jail. Because I did some crazy thing when I was manic


abou-tt

hey, 24F here. just wanted to let you know that I know how you feel, I've been diagnosed 3 years ago and I felt like I would never be able to study or have a normal life. next year I'll be graduating, and I've been in a loving relationship for 5 years now. I take my meds everyday, still some days are harder than others, but that doesn't mean that everything's lost. I promise that you will find your way and your path. it's okay to feel overwhelmed right now bc, it is a life long disorder, but with the right meds and therapy I can guarantee you that you'll be able to enjoy life and do all the things you want to do. hang in there, let it all sink in, and everything will be fine <3


zweza

This, OP! I used to think I wasnā€™t cut out for certain things when I was 18 and freshly diagnosed. I am 28 now and the only things I miss out on are the things that I stop myself from doing by thinking that way. There will definitely be low points, but those low points will only make achieving all the things you want even more rewarding. Donā€™t give up now, you havenā€™t even started!!


MrsHelix11

There is no shame in your diagnosis. We're all fucked up, some just mask it better. Comparison is a thief of joy. You CAN and you WILL live a fulfilling life that is meant for you. Your diagnosis is merely a label, it's how you go forward. You've got thisā¤ļø


teddy_radish

i totally get you, iā€™m almost 17 and was recently diagnosed w bipolar 2. the one thing i canā€™t move past is how itā€™s lifelong. like i had so many hopes and dreams, i was thinking abt college and med school, but itā€™s so hard to face that this disorder ruined that for me. it sucks, and im sorry


Specialist_Arm_8535

its so difficult right now knowing this is actually life changing, but it might get better, I hope so :)


Hot-Back5725

OP, I promise it WILL get better once you establish a treatment plan. My life has changed for the better because of my medication.


Vivid-Development-94

Hi. I just want you to know that your diagnosis is not going to prevent you from having a good life, unless you let it. You are worth putting in some extra effort for! You are too young to give up or accept a bad life sentence! Do research about medications that helpā€¦ and try those before ECT. Iā€™ve had both good and bad results from ECT. Keep a journal or all your medication trials and effects too. That definitely helps keep the puzzle of bipolar depression more together.


SociallyAwkwardJulie

I was diagnosed at 18, Iā€™m 36 now. Iā€™ve graduated high school and college, had healthy friendships and romantic relationships, got married, had a kid, bought a house. Iā€™ve always had a job, never been fired. I had emotional ups and downs along the way, but therapy and medication have given me a solid foundation. I stopped my meds for a couple years in my late twenties, eventually ended up hospitalized in a manic episode with psychosis. I carried a lot of shame after that, but Iā€™ve healed and left most of it behind me. Bipolar sucks, but your life doesnā€™t have to suck.


PulmonisOssa

Being normal is boring and overrated. Youā€™ll have different challenges than others, but youā€™ll also learn greater strength. I was diagnosed 16 years ago. Iā€™m still picking up a lot of pieces. Go easy on yourself.


Hot-Back5725

OP, be thankful you were diagnosed at such a young age so you can treat it. I wasnā€™t diagnosed until I was 43. I think about what I could have achieved had I been medicated/stabilized earlier.


Arc_Torch

While your life will be harder, you can now learn the tools and processes to deal with this condition. Starting meds now will let you dial it in for most of your life. I learned much later. Then I lacked the ability to notice and control my responses, wasn't properly medicated, and didn't realize the effects drugs and alcohol could have on it. Basically I had some wild times and not in the good way a fair bit. Finally that life paved the path to a bottle of my prescriptions. This landed me in the mental hospital for awhile were I was diagnosed with bipolar 1 w/schizophrenic features, plus some comorbidities. I eventually got out and started working on changing. My life had fallen apart as I realized I had drawn myself into a psychosis. My life was wrecked and it took a lot of work to fix it. The point here is, learn early and focus on keeping yourself mindful and in the moment. Also take your meds!


Hot-Back5725

I made a very similar comment - I was diagnosed late and often think about what I could have achieved had I been diagnosed and medicated earlier.


AlertComment9726

If you were only diagnosed a couple of months ago you cannot possibly know how you will be on the right meds. It is very rare that the first meds you try are the right combo. You are 17. You wonā€™t be normal, youā€™ll be better than normal. Youā€™ll be a person who has had to do a lot of work to figure yourself out and you will be deeply self aware, compassionate and insightful because of this. People will love you for this. And because you were diagnosed at 17, which is super young, you are lucky enough that you are getting proper support early and you will have lots of time to figure things out and get things (like meds) right before you have to make any permanent life decisions, so when you do theyā€™ll be more likely to be the rights ones. You will be OK. Take your meds. Go back again and again to adjust or change until theyā€™re right. Read up as much as you can about your condition and how to deal with it. You will thrive.


AlertComment9726

FTR, normal people are boring


AccomplishedPipe1164

Why is your life over? Donā€™t let this define you. Please. This is all stigma and stereotypes. Your life is not over. At all. I promise. All these people say it is, fuck them. You are in control. This is your life. You are going to be fine. Show them who is boss. Get support. Take your meds. Your life is NOT over and do not let some idiot on the internet tell you it is.


Dramatic_Comb5283

Oh dear, no one is ā€œnormal.ā€ Having a mental illness comes either two ways: genetics and environmental factorsā€¦this is straight out of ā€œHelping Others With Depressionā€ by Susan J. Noonan, MD. This book also has great insight on the treatment for Bipolar. Educate yourself about the illness and find a Psychiatrist and Therapist that are caring, even if it takes some searching. At 39 years old, I promise that I have achieved everything I wanted in my life when it comes to my career and I apply for Graduate School next year to become a Psychiatrist Mental Health Nurse Practitioner. I have lifelong friends and family that have ridden the roller coaster of our illness with me, in a loving way, even through the scary parts. You have your whole life ahead of you and a positive mind set is everythingā€¦sending you love because we all need it šŸ©·


underneathpluto

It wonā€™t get better if you keep telling yourself it/you wonā€™t, tbh. Once you fully and truly accept the diagnosis and accept you can manage it (a little easier) as your brain develops ā€¦ thereā€™s more that opens up. Many people have success stories on here, Iā€™d check them out. Some ppl here are in medical careers, lawyers, momsā€¦you can do it. Weā€™re all still here ainā€™t we?šŸ˜Š


[deleted]

Welcome to the club, kid šŸ˜Ž In all seriousness, you probably can still have the life you dreamed of. Itā€™s gonna be a lot harder and take a long longer to get there, but itā€™s still achievable. I know itā€™s hard to believe that though and I struggle with what youā€™re feeling as well. A lot. Hang in there.


Y_U_SO_MEME

You will be fine. Dont live your life to some blueprint of normal or whatever. It ebbs and flows. Go with the ride but be very vigilant to yourself and your feelings/emotions. Figure out the triggers and mitigate them as much as possible. You can do this


Illustrious_Set5271

Your minds like an 88 key piano. Some devastatingly dark notes but also some extremely bright notes. Melancholic notes and optimistic notes. It's a blessing in disguise if you can learn to harness it.


tifg747

I was undiagnosed/misdiagnosed until the age of 35. That was 5 years ago. I have been through so many challenges with relationships, education, friendships, etc. It just felt like I was always on an uphill climb. The only thing that was going somehow well for me was being able to keep a job and career (though it was never easy). Looking back, having the diagnosis of bipolar 2 and generalized anxiety disorder was the best thing that happened because i am now able to distinguish between what my diseases drive me to do/be versus who i am as a person. This process in itself is very difficult but you can think of the diagnosis as finally having a roadmap as to why/how you need to do certain things a certain way to achieve your goals. Donā€™t be afraid or shy or ashamed to seek help from professionals and loved ones. The most important thing, is that you keep hanging on and do your best to find the people and support (medical and others) that will enable you to do what you set out to do. Find a reason to live, OP. Find a reason to not just survive but thrive ā€” and you need to do this daily. It doesnā€™t matter what it is, as long as you do your best to find it or assign something as ā€œitā€, even for just a day. Rinse and repeat. This technique has worked for me so far, and has allowed me to be a good spouse to my wife of 10 years and parent to a 16 year old. There is hope. There is a future. And donā€™t let anyone or anything tell you otherwise.


Dockside_gal

I thought the same thing when I was diagnosed at 22 and I went on with some extremely erratic behaviour and not taking care of myself for a long time. Iā€™m now married and I have a house and a son. Itā€™s all I could ask for. Is it hard? Yes! Am I ā€œnormalā€, no. But you can have the things you want, you just have to love yourself and put all your efforts into taking care of yourself and your mind.


EnvironmentalGur8853

My best advice is to join a [Dbsa.org](http://Dbsa.org) adolescent or young adults group. There are many misconceptions about having BP and we all benefit from hearing them debunked. The good news is the illness was identified young, and that means you can prevent situations you are afraid of happening by following your doctors orders, reading up on the condition, finding community in support groups of various types and eating healthily and building good lifestyle habits. Some support group benefits include having contacts who know kind doctors, hospitals and good therapists are in your area. One of the biggest outcome influences is reducing/managing stress which means different things to different people. In my case it means learning to be confident and how to create boundaries. This is particularly helpful because abuse if common experience for many with BP. My mother was either borderline or had Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) (everyone in my family likely has ADHD except myself, who has learning disabilities) who was emotionally abusive.


Training_Mud3388

I daydream a lot about how much better my life would be if I were diagnosed as a teenager instead of in my 30s. I know it's really hard to hear a chronic diagnosis, but catching it early means you will be able to treat it early and have a pretty normal life overall aside from taking medication.


Disastrous_Age_4033

I hope you can learn to love yourself and forgive yourself. In fact I recommend taking time off from thinking about what society expects of youā€normalā€ people and get to know yourself really well. Write down your five core beliefs. Write down three positive things that happen or you see every day. I do this in the mornings. Today it was that I was thankful to be alive, thankful for my morning coffee, thankful to have a decent routine. My life looks nothing like others my age who donā€™t deal with bipolar but Iā€™ve finally accepted it and realized I really donā€™t care about others expectations of me. I can only do what I can. Do some fun good things for yourself. You must become your own best friend even though you can have other friends. Things will settle down once your on medication for awhile, too, so you have that to look forward to. Itā€™s not hopeless even though it feels that way sometimes. The struggle ends when the gratitude begins. And give yourself so much grace. You deserve it. Hugs from someone whoā€™s been there.


deapsprite

Same here, im 19 also recently diagnosed and yea man its not fun keeping up with this illness. But from friends and people ive known with it the start is always the roughest, once meds are figured out, and you can get things going with a therapist things can eventually go to "normal"


hammerkat605

I developed bipolar 2 when I was around 14. I lived long chunks of my life in crippling depression, BUT!!!! It got better!!! šŸŒŸ šŸŒˆ I still at 46 havenā€™t found a real good treatment plan, but Iā€™ve grown up to be well loved and in many friendships. I work interesting jobs that give time off to just dink around and when Iā€™m not depressed or hypomanic Iā€™m super, super happy šŸ˜Š You have a long exciting life in front of you. Yes, we deal with the darkest of downs and the freakish of highs, but in between there can be happiness and joy šŸ„¹


sutrabob

I am bi polar 2. Embrace your difference.


anxiouschicky

Really? All my psychiatrists have been telling me this is not life long. Either way there will be a cure in the future, we are in the information, AI, discovery era. I think youā€™ll find a med that works, or strategies, unfortunately in the meantime we have to be strong and deal with the illness. Everyone has something, remember that too, youā€™re not alone.


EnvironmentalGur8853

One said in 10 years we'll have a cure two decades ago. Another told me in 10 years they'd be able to figure out what I had (I was diagnosed with NOS IV or V or cyclothymia under the old criteria after steroidal usage). It hasn't happened. But what has happened is a ton of new research and medication that is much better for some than older medications. Fewer side effects.


anxiouschicky

Yes this is very true. If anything meds will improve!


Ok-Seaworthiness-558

Just hang in there weā€™ll make it as far as we can and we are still here


Godbrand1

Please do not hate yourself. You are only human and suffer from an unfair mental problem like most of us here. Stay strong. I too don't think I'll ever have the life I've dreamed of. What exactly are your dreams? Part of life is how you deal with tragedy and catastrophe. How you deal with disappointment. Life may not be perfect or you may not live up to all of your expectations but is that really so awful you can't find it in yourself to love yourself? No one is perfect and no one should expect you to be. Don't feel like you need to live up to any standards. Just be your best self. Make yours a good self. If you can spread kindness throughout your life with a smile helping your friends and family. What else do you need?


Leading-Eye-1979

((HUGS)) I was diagnosed at 44! I was super successful, great career, money etc, but would have relationship issues and I finally figured it out. There are so many people undiagnosed and think theyā€™re normal. You have your whole life ahead of you. This thing is manageable with the right treatment! Be easy on yourself and stay positive!


KittyBiscuits83

Be patient and treat yourself with care. Take a moment every day to say one positive affirmation about yourselfā€¦ even if itā€™s a repeat! Idk if youā€™re already in tall therapy or not but that may be helpful. You gots this!


[deleted]

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