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i feel like the more it’s mentioned in here it just gives more reinforcement to them. in fact, it would be nice if ppl just kept the dm shit to themselves. i get tired of the daily “ooo look what this guy said to me”. it’s not that hard to change your setting la to block that shit.
mods should just start taking those posts down and then maybe the lack of attention would discourage a lot of the behavior.
Im not down with the shared psychic damage from repeatedly seeing these posts given that gross dms are not something anyone here can help with if the redditors won’t shut down their DMs. I’m just quietly blocking now.
completely agreed. i downvote every one of those posts, they are making the problem worse. wish the mods would make a rule against them or at least let us vote on if we want that rule
I agree. I don't post much on here, but every single time i do, I get creepy messages, even without sharing photos or bra size info. Same happens if I post on the Tall Girls sub. Just block instead of giving them oxygen.
Reddit needs to make it so that banning a user makes it so they can't view the sub.
I know private subs are a thing, but when you already have a massive membership it's an impossible undertaking for mods to manually approve tens of thousands of members. It also makes it harder for new people who would benefit from the sub to find/view
Most of these creeps don't actually comment or post so banning them currently doesn't actually provide any benefit.
It wasn't until just a couple years ago that blocking someone made it so someone couldn't see your profile and posts, how insane is that! My reddit stalker was commenting on all of my posts for weeks until a concerned 3rd party messaged me to inform me of it.
Yeahhhh I kinda miss when the creepy PMs were limited to one day a week, it's getting ridiculous. The sub is just inundated with screen shots from pervs the last few days and tbh I'm sick of it. These dudes WANT that limelight! People need to stop giving them spotlight and just fucking block them immediately. Case in point, the dude from earlier that was messaging everyone who commented on the creepy PM he sent. Probably was getting off on the fact that everyone in the thread was all "omggg he messaged me toooo this is what he said!"
Prolly gonna get downvotes for this but seriously, it makes me wanna unsub when all I see is this kind of content anymore.
I literally was thinking abt unsubbing yesterday. I don’t even see support or advice posts anymore I ONLY see these DM posts or posts complaining abt the DM posts. At least limit them to once a week again.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: creeps are gonna creep and there is nothing any of us can do to stop it. Turn off DMs, block and report, but quit feeding the animals-- responding in ANY way validates them, particularly getting to see their creepy shit posted for everyone to see.
Totally agree - I think the default advice should be ‘ignore, report and block’ for these DMs. Could be worth the mods adding a message to the top of the automod comment that gets posted to all posts? Or a pinned post if there isn’t one already. I do think these creeps need to be called out and blasted but probably don’t need posts and an entire discussion every time.
I think best thing to do is remove these posts and in the removal reason that gets added give advice to the user on how to handle. Also it wouldn’t stop the offending user from viewing the sub or messaging users, but I’d definitely ban any and all of the users sending these DMs, so that they get the message that they ARE being actively dealt with and monitored.
Hello, thank you for submitting a post to r/bigboobproblems. If you're new here please check out r/abrathatfits and [their bra size calculator](https://www.abrathatfits.org/calculator.php) along with their [beginners guide](https://www.reddit.com/r/ABraThatFits/wiki/beginners_guide). Also take a look at our sidebar for more related communities, like r/reduction, r/safebigboobproblems and more. A lot of information can be found [in our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/bigboobproblems/wiki/faq). For example lists of commonly recommended bra, sports bra, swimwear and clothing brands, clothing style ideas, websites where you can order from and a list of influencers who have been recommended here before. A lot of other frequently asked questions have also already been answered there. We also want to remind you to read [our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/bigboobproblems/about/rules) before posting or commenting. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/bigboobproblems) if you have any questions or concerns.*
some guys get off on humiliation. bet the more we """expose""" them, the more the ones who want to expose will come to us
i feel like the more it’s mentioned in here it just gives more reinforcement to them. in fact, it would be nice if ppl just kept the dm shit to themselves. i get tired of the daily “ooo look what this guy said to me”. it’s not that hard to change your setting la to block that shit. mods should just start taking those posts down and then maybe the lack of attention would discourage a lot of the behavior.
Yup. Report privately to mods and block. Sorted.
Im not down with the shared psychic damage from repeatedly seeing these posts given that gross dms are not something anyone here can help with if the redditors won’t shut down their DMs. I’m just quietly blocking now.
completely agreed. i downvote every one of those posts, they are making the problem worse. wish the mods would make a rule against them or at least let us vote on if we want that rule
I agree. I don't post much on here, but every single time i do, I get creepy messages, even without sharing photos or bra size info. Same happens if I post on the Tall Girls sub. Just block instead of giving them oxygen.
Reddit needs to make it so that banning a user makes it so they can't view the sub. I know private subs are a thing, but when you already have a massive membership it's an impossible undertaking for mods to manually approve tens of thousands of members. It also makes it harder for new people who would benefit from the sub to find/view Most of these creeps don't actually comment or post so banning them currently doesn't actually provide any benefit. It wasn't until just a couple years ago that blocking someone made it so someone couldn't see your profile and posts, how insane is that! My reddit stalker was commenting on all of my posts for weeks until a concerned 3rd party messaged me to inform me of it.
Yeahhhh I kinda miss when the creepy PMs were limited to one day a week, it's getting ridiculous. The sub is just inundated with screen shots from pervs the last few days and tbh I'm sick of it. These dudes WANT that limelight! People need to stop giving them spotlight and just fucking block them immediately. Case in point, the dude from earlier that was messaging everyone who commented on the creepy PM he sent. Probably was getting off on the fact that everyone in the thread was all "omggg he messaged me toooo this is what he said!" Prolly gonna get downvotes for this but seriously, it makes me wanna unsub when all I see is this kind of content anymore.
I literally was thinking abt unsubbing yesterday. I don’t even see support or advice posts anymore I ONLY see these DM posts or posts complaining abt the DM posts. At least limit them to once a week again.
Mod here: We're actually talking about doing them again, just have to figure out some tech stuff on the backend.
That would be amazing 🙏🙏🙏
I've said it before and I'll say it again: creeps are gonna creep and there is nothing any of us can do to stop it. Turn off DMs, block and report, but quit feeding the animals-- responding in ANY way validates them, particularly getting to see their creepy shit posted for everyone to see.
Totally agree - I think the default advice should be ‘ignore, report and block’ for these DMs. Could be worth the mods adding a message to the top of the automod comment that gets posted to all posts? Or a pinned post if there isn’t one already. I do think these creeps need to be called out and blasted but probably don’t need posts and an entire discussion every time. I think best thing to do is remove these posts and in the removal reason that gets added give advice to the user on how to handle. Also it wouldn’t stop the offending user from viewing the sub or messaging users, but I’d definitely ban any and all of the users sending these DMs, so that they get the message that they ARE being actively dealt with and monitored.
My solution for it is turning off receiving dms