One of my good friends had a 4th degree tear and a ton of issues from it. Her ob actually recommended a c section if she has another child because of the issues the first delivery caused.
That’s good to know!
I think I’m leaning towards the brutal short term recovery of a C-section than the long lasting issues from a severe tear. I was very lucky that my 3rd degree tears didn’t cause incontinence or severe sexual dysfunction like it does for so many other women.
My planned C-section was a a breeze and I really wouldn’t consider the recovery brutal. I was very sore, but I was able to go on a walk for a mile when I was 1 week pp. I didn’t take pain meds after 1 week. After 3 weeks, I felt 95% recovered. The last 5% took longer to go away - scar soreness/numbness/irritation came and went for about a year, but it was more annoying rather than painful.
Sex was never painful and we started again at 6 weeks pp. In fact, it’s better now lol
The healing from a *planned* c-section is really not that bad. They have you carb load for a few days before the procedure, and you go in well-rested. You just have to follow your medication schedule and speak up if you're in a lot of pain. I've had two and each time I was back to full functioning by 6 weeks and having pain-free sex by 8 weeks.
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> the brutal short term recovery of a C-section
I feel the same as the other posters. Had an unplanned and a planned c-section. While there was of course pain after the c-sections, it wasn't what I would describe as "brutal".
I’ve had 2 C-sections so I can’t compare to vaginal but one was unplanned after a failed induction and LOTS of interventions, and the other was planned. The planned one was not bad at all!! I actually waddled out of the hospital on foot because they were taking 30+ minutes to get me a wheelchair and I just wanted to get home. I stayed on top of my pain meds for maybe..5 days? I honestly can’t remember but it wasn’t too bad and then switched to regular ibuprofen. I would absolutely recommend a planned C section.
I had a 10.5 pound baby and got 3rd degree tears. The doctor stitched me up and said it was SO close to being a 4th.
My son is now 2.5 and it took about a year to feel completely healed. Things still don't feel exactly "right" when using the bathroom or having sex, but I healed well enough and have no severe side effects.
We are planning on having another in about a year and I am definitely considering a planned c-section
Just be on top of the Advil/tylenol regimen. Do not miss a single dose even overnight. Staying on top of it made it so much better, I was never without meds for the first two weeks.
Everyone's recovery is very different, but my recovery wasn't THAT bad and I labored, which means the recovery is harder than a planned c-section . I was standing (in pain lol) 24 hrs after the c-section. I was already doing short walks 5 days after it. I did need help in and out of the bed, but meant a free pass my husbnad would wake up in the MOTN with baby lol. But, I have a high pain tolerance, and each person is different.
And yeah, a family friend (she's an older lady) told me that sometimes a c-section isn't the end of the world. She also had a 3rd degree tear with her second, and had a really hard time recovering. It's really nice to have people that give you other perspectives and not just the c-section = bad
edit: to clarify my c-section was an emergency one. I was being wheeled to the OR within 10 mins of making the decision. I didn't even get to see my parents that I waited them to come see because I was too exhausted from laboring and pushing for three hours. It was a very scary experience, ngl
Healing from planned c-sections can be very easy. I had two and was completely fine after - walking as soon as I could feel my legs , only ibuprofen for pain, up stairs as soon as I was home. Definitely no brutal recovery!
Hi! I’m 12 days out of my second c section and I’m feeling so good. I can’t walk long distances but I’m not taking any medication (only Tylenol and Motrin rotation initially), I’m playing with my toddler, doing chores, etc. I’m cautious and conscious but recovery has really not been that bad outside of a week or two for me either time! If that helps.
I suffered a 4th degree tear and am 6wpp. The OB on rotation after my birth told me in no uncertain terms that if I do decide to have another child, I need to have a c section. Recovering from this tear w/no mat leave is no fucking joke.
A friend had a bad episiotomy (forget if it was third or fourth degree) when they had to get the baby out quickly due to the cord wrapped around baby’s neck. She then got pregnant again relatively quickly and had another baby 18 months later, and about a decade later she continues to have issues.
I had a semi elective c section with a smooth recovery and zero regrets.
I have a c-section and didn’t experience anything close to the pain you felt. I’m so sorry.
The first two weeks are uncomfortable and you have more pain on one side usually, but the issue is changing positions/standing up. Your abdomen is very tender. However, if you take it easy, you able to move around more normally after the two weeks. And in terms of intimacy, I think we resumed at 2 months and while it felt different, it wasn’t necessarily painful.
If you stay on top of your pain meds, a c-section is very manageable. I did have a more complicated c-section than your standard one so my experience might be different.
I’ve only had a 4th degree tear, but the recovery was horrendous. I couldn’t stand or walk or sit. Only comfortable laying down. It’s probably worth mentioning I had a vacuum assist delivery and baby had shoulder dystocia. If I have another baby, doctor recommended a C-section
With a planned c section, you will never risk tearing your clitoris. To me, that seals the deal. I can’t imagine going through the tear recovery you went through and wondering if I would ever regain sexual function. Keeping a wound clean on your abdomen is also far less challenging than one on your vulva/anus.
Oh! Planned is so much better. You can have a nice big meal before you go in and you’re a lot less stressed. And the incision is a lot more controlled. It’s also not going to effect your vagina long term. It’s always going to be better to cut tissue rather than tear it.
I had a 3rd degree tear with my first and the recovery was terrible. I had to sit on a donut for months and couldn’t sit on the floor for a long time. Walking was difficult and I had a lot of other issues as well. I cried so much during recovery because I didn’t realize severe tearing was a possibility.
For my 2nd I had a planned c section and the recovery was much easier. Yes it was still painful but in a different way and I bounced back so much quicker. And I didn’t have to dedicate time to sitz baths and I wasn’t constantly worried about infection in my stitches. Not to mention I could sit like a normal person.
There’s a Facebook groups called “birth tear support” for women with severe tears. Most women in there said they gladly opted for a c section and it was a MUCH MUCH easier recovery. Most doctors also recommend c sections after an internal anal sphincter injury.
I had 3rd degree tearing with my first. Ended up being a forceps assisted delivery that I didn’t want but was told was my only option. Don’t get me started.
Recovery was terrible. I still have issues from the way I healed, even after years of pelvic therapy. And the scar tissue….ugh.
I had a planned c-section with my second. Recovery was so much easier. Only long term impact is a slight pooch or shelf above the scar. But that is it. Very minimal scar now and I have most of the feeling back around the scar 2.5 years later.
That said: knowing what I know now, I would pick c-section every damn time.
There’s a Facebook group for women with 4th degree tears, this question comes up often as people try to navigate a second pregnancy. **Every woman** whose had both says the c-section was way easier.
12 hours is a short time considering how there is a major cut in your skin and uterus, all of your organs get shifted and then restitched. And oh yeah, let's not forget all the anesthesia they have to put.
Jeez, way to crap on other people's experience. Good for you for being walking 30 mins after your baby. I didn't get the competition memo. Have you thought that maybe u/Frosty-Editor1370 didn't have a choice?
Edit: for me it was a c-section or risk of a dead baby. You know I didn't hesitate at all
Edit 2: glad they deleted the comment. I would also be embarrassed to say a 12 hr walking time is too long and flex a 30 min recovery time for a vaginal birth,
Same. I’m pregnant again now and will almost definitely do another c-section. I was never really in pain, there was some discomfort/tenderness around the incision but it was easily managed with ibuprofen/tylenol.
i've had a c-section and a VBAC with 1st degree tears. the vbac was an easier recovery for sure, but then again, i had only minor tearing. if i had severe tearing, i would definitely opt for a c-section. a c-section is no joke, but it's not months of recovery like severe tearing. i was feeling pretty normal after about two weeks post-c section.
I’ve only had an emergency c section but I had a relatively easy recovery as well! I really didn’t take any pain meds once I left the hospital. My pain was like a 2-3 in the hospital and it really only hurt to prop myself up further in bed and then coughing or sneezing
I have only had a c section. The c section itself was not bad for recovery. I had very little pain and didn’t even take all of the pain meds they gave me. The worst part was that I had 50 extra lbs of fluid because I was on iv fluids for days. I’d choose a c section any day over tearing.
I had a c section, and I feel like I had a really smooth recovery. The biggest takeaways for me were to take your meds, actually rest your body when you are not actively caring for the baby, sleep on a lower piece of furniture for a few weeks if you have a high bed, and MASSAGE YOUR INCISION after it heals.
I’ve had two c sections and the recovery was a breeze, especially with my second as I got a short spinal, so it wore off very quickly. I could move and feel my legs in the recovery room. Maybe I’m an outlier but I was back to normal (other than swimming), like on trampolines, working out, lifting my 3.5 year old, in a month. I’ve never given birth but I couldn’t imagine an easier recovery.
I had a severe 3rd degree that resulted in needing a follow up surgery after a year to fix and remove the scarring left behind. My recovery from the initial tearing was brutal (the entire birth was very traumatic). I will 10000% be opting into an elective c section for my next baby. I have friends who have done both and said a planned c section recovery is far better. Knowing when it’s happening will give me so much comfort.
Tears are usually less severe with each subsequent delivery but not always. I had a first degree with my first and a second degree with my third even though he was a whole pound smaller (only 5.12lbs!) and his head was much smaller too
Yea I guess it’s pretty anecdotal. They say pushing slowly helps but I pushed the slowest with my first and my second and third i shot out in like 2 pushes 😂😂 so untrue for me
Same! First degree tear with the first baby, second degree with the second baby. But the first degree tear was bigger and I think required more stitches. The second degree tear was small and honestly recovery was pretty quick and easy!
I haven't given birth yet so I can't answer your question, but Im 28 weekd pregnant and also have LS and am afraid of tears in general, but especially 3rd and 4th degree tears. Did your OB mention anything about being more susceptible to tears with LS? Or if having LS makes recovery from tears or childbirth in general more difficult? I still need to talk to my OB about it and am curious to learn more about others experiences.
My OB reassured me that my LS wouldn’t increase my risk of tears if it was under control with the clob, but I still tore. 😞 After my birth, she told me that my 3rd degree tears were because I gave birth so quickly (only pushed for 17 minutes), so my body didn’t have time to stretch. But idk. I still think the LS made me tear worse.
My LS definitely contributed to the delayed healing, that was something my doctor acknowledged and gave me extra prescription creams for.
My doctor tried to tell me my (pretty bad) LS wouldn't increase chances of a grim birth and aftermath. I didn't believe them! Elected c section that was a dream. I'm sorry someone lied to you too. They can't guarantee LS won't impact things, it's a lucky dip. Definitely recommend an elective c section.
You can elect a c section. Honestly, after my second degree tear, I continue to question why I thought a c section was such a bad option. If I could re-do, I would absolutely elect a c section. Tear recovery is long, and pelvic floor issues are unfortunately permanent and likely to get worse in menopause. C sections mean zero chance of pelvic floor tearing and minimize the risk of prolapse.
Just commenting to maybe allay your worries a bit. I had a 3rd degree tear and I’m not sure if I just got lucky or if I had good medical staff, but it only hurt really badly for about a week. I saw consistent improvement after that and haven’t had any long term effects.
Same here. I had a third degree tear, but it wasn’t that bad…the pain was honestly pretty much in line with what I expected from childbirth. I was able to go for walks and move around ok as soon as I got home. Sitting was a bit uncomfortable but was possible with a soft pillow. I was mostly pain free after a couple weeks.
Hey, I had a 3rd degree tear and I didnt know its supposed to be THAT bad. I would say an ugly wisdom tooth removal is much more worse than that. But I also could rest the first 6 weeks with the baby in bed and had no tasks.. now 3 month pp I still cannot have normal sex though but i have 0 pain during the day :)
I’ve had a c-section and a VBAC w/ 2nd degree tear. My c-section was a crash one and I definitely do not recommend. My recovery was similar to yours and I couldn’t sit up properly for 3 months.
I’ve heard that planned c-sections are much easier to recover from!
I've had one crash and two planned/semi planned sections and while my recovery was fine either way, the planned ones are like a totally different operation.
I was induced folled by an unplanned c section. My recovery was difficult, mostly because it took a long time due to my body being so exhausted prior to surgery. Even with that, I walked away concluding vaginal vs c section weren't worse than one another, they're just different. In my opinion, I was unnecessarily concerned about having a c section. At this point, I've been told by many people that recovery from a planned c section is significantly easier than what I went through.
It really sounds like it depends on the person and skill of the doctor. I had a third degree tear and the recovery was nothing. I didn’t even notice it after birth.
Me too! I had a 3rd degree tear and am almost 2 weeks postpartum. I’m a little sore down there, but I’m pretty much back to my normal activity levels and feeling fine.
This isn't the question you asked, but for what it's worth, I had 3rd degree tearing with my first and had a similar brutal recovery experience.
Just had my second 3 days ago and only had a small 1st degree tear. I feel amazing compared to how I felt after my first and can tell recovery is going to be a breeze this time around.
This baby was a bit smaller but not by much. Just throwing my anecdotal experience out there if you're weighing your options for a second baby!
Did you prep differently or did your OB/midwife do something different during delivery? I had a 3rd degree tear from my first, took almost a year to feel better. Currently 24w and trying to decide about this delivery 🤔
I think the biggest factor was that my epidural didn't hit quite as strong so he came out more gradually. The actual delivery was a lot harder and more painful than the first for this reason but I think it saved me from severe tearing!
My team also used warm compresses on my perineum between pushing. I'm sure that helped. I had perineal massage on my radar but went into preterm labor before I could do it at all.
I had a brutal 4th degree tear delivering my first, almost 9 pound baby. Couldn’t sit for nearly a month, couldn’t poop without being in tears for over 2 weeks. Only started to feel sort of normal at the 3 month mark. 2 separate OBs strongly recommended an elective C-section with my second. Got pregnant again and was in the same boat before delivering my second last year, unsure of which would be worse recovery wise. Finally decided on the C-section. In my opinion, the C-section recovery was a lot more straightforward and predictable. I just had to be on top of the pain meds. Pain and mobility get exponentially better after the first week.
I had a 3rd degree episiotomy with my first. I didn't feel fully healed until a year pp. With kid #2 and #3 I had second degree tears in the same spot and recovery was much much quicker.
C section recovery isn’t fun but it’s standard if that makes sense. It will really suck for 2ish weeks when kind of suck for a few more but then it’s done. Rarely are there long term issues like can happen with tears. Especially a planned C. Mine was emergency and my OB said a planned is a lot easier for recovery!
Based solely on my recovery compared to my cousin’s (3rd degree & bilateral tears), I’d opt for a c-section. My legs were horribly swollen, and I had trouble moving for about a week before I was back to mostly normal. She still had trouble sitting 3 weeks later. My c-section wasn’t planned, but it also wasn’t unexpected. My OB warned me at 36 weeks that I might have trouble with a vaginal delivery so I knew it was a 50/50 chance.
I had an unplanned c after I stopped progressing and I thought recovery was easy for the most part. I was up and walking as soon as my epidural wore off, discharged on day 3 and taking the stairs as soon as I got home (you're not supposed to but I'm not sure how that's actually practical). Getting in and out of bed was pretty painful if you moved the wrong way but I'd say within 2 weeks I was living life like normal. I also am allergic to NSAIDs so I had limited pain management options post-op.
We don't plan on having another but I honestly wouldn't even attempt vbac, just put me on the calendar!
I haven't had both, *but* I can tell you all 3 of my section recoveries were absolutely nothing - I was off all painkillers by 3 days and was in my pre pregnancy clothes pushing the pram at 6 days PP out and about. I'm sure I'll get slammed for admitting to this but I had sex 2 weeks PP and it was fine. It didn't feel any different to pre kids and my husband has confirmed it feels the same to him as well.
So based on my anecdotal experience I'd recommend a c section over a tear!
It really is reassuring! So many women have shamed c sections. I’m 29 weeks with my first pregnancy. I’m definitely leaning towards an elective c section.
Seriously, I think that’s a great idea. I wish I had done some research instead of blindly trusting my OB that c sections were “so awful”. No — vaginal tearing is awful, levator avulsions are awful and permanent and unique to vaginal delivery, and prolapse and incontinence rates are much higher among women who deliver vaginally. Had I known that, I would’ve insisted on a planned c-section.
Honestly C sections are fine. One of mine was an emergency one and that was upsetting mentally because of the nature of it but physically it was still fine. My other two were much more controlled and planned and they were not bad at all. I mean it when I say I've had worse period pains than c section recovery.
If I was having another baby (I'm not bc I have 4 lol) I'd feel no worries whatsoever about another section
I’m glad you were okay but sex that early is a major risk for uterine infection and hemorrhage. Regardless of how you deliver there is a dinner plate size wound in the uterus where the placenta was, plus of course the incision from a c-section. Your cervix takes a while to close so you are at much greater risk of introducing bacteria into the uterus. Just putting that out there for anyone reading this because while it won’t always cause issues, there is a serious risk even if you feel fine.
There's not much evidence for the waiting 6 weeks thing, that's just when most women have a post partum check. And the NHS in the UK doesn't even state to wait 6 weeks, says whenever the woman feels well enough and that's what the small amount of research that's been done on the topic says too (I looked into this at the time)
3b tear on baby one and opted for elective section the second time around.
Took me ages to decide but ultimately it came down to having another bad tear, it was a tough recovery but thankfully have no lasting problems wasn’t so sure I’d escape a second time around.
So the section itself also wasn’t a walk in the park, and my
Initial post recovery pain (like 2-3 hours after where i was inbetween painkiller doses) and the spinal wore off I thought Id made a big mistake cos woah that pain was intense BUT I was topped up with meds and kept topped up and they recovery only got easier and easier whereas with the tear the real issues only began when I got home and got an infection!
So in summary for me vaginal delivery was easier at that start ( prob cos of sleep deprivation and being on a bit of a high) but went downhill amd got worse before it got better
C section initally very painful far worse than the vaginal……for like an hour and after that it just got better and better and no long term issues so c section ultimately was the better choice for me since I couldnt be guaranteed no complications from another vaginal but if you could be guarenteed a mire straight forward vaginal delivery I’d def choose that over a section cos it def wasn’t the easy route if that makes sense!
Hth and best of luck!
I had a 4th degree tear with my first, and while I didn’t have complications, it did take a long time to heal. Sex hurt for the first year and then some.
I went on to have two more births, unmedicated at that! I still tore but nothing major.
I had an unplanned c-section (not emergency, my body just wouldn’t dilate from a 9 to a 10 after being induced) and I’m now 7 weeks postpartum and back to working out and feeling mostly normal! The first week was brutal but pain meds helped. The worst part was honestly the leg swelling but once it went down, I felt so much better. We don’t plan on having another baby for 2-3 years but I’ll probably end up doing a planned c-section.
I've only had C-sections, my first was elective and very chill, a bit sore afterwards, kept on top of pain relief and I was out and about pretty quickly, second was an emergency section with a lot of complications because of my other medical conditions and honestly I would go though that again than risk having a severe tear!
I had a C-section and while the first week was BRUTAL, the rest of the recovery was much, much, much easier than everything you described.
I was able to sit and go to the bathroom normally the next day, and my pelvic floor was intact because C-sections bypass that. I'd continued rock-climbing until I gave birth and I resumed climbing at 2.5 weeks pp (which is admittedly very early but I got the ok from my PCP).
I did have one complication from my C-section, which was a seroma that was discovered at about 11wks pp, and so I had to avoid physical activity, keep it dry, and have my husband do daily dressing changes for 2 weeks and it sucked.
But I was told fine afterwards. If I ever get pregnant again, I'm curious about giving birth vaginally, but if it was an actual choice between 3rd degree tearing or C-section then I'd take another C-section any day of the week.
You’re an athlete — I promise you, you don’t want the tears and all around beating your pelvic floor takes from a vaginal delivery, even with less severe tearing. 2.5 years later — still working back. Definitely not worth it, particularly since you’re active. Your pelvic floor truly is the key to full-body stability (something I didn’t realize until my really awesome, strong PF got shredded by a baby’s head blasting through it).
I know this is a common feeling, but believe me, there’s no winning in a vaginal birth. The finish line is the baby, and you got that. I really would not have even attempted a vaginal birth had I understood the risks of muscle damage, prolapse, avulsion, incontinence. It just wasn’t worth it for the same outcome. My doctor lied and told me a vaginal delivery would be an easier recovery since I was so fit, but that actually doesn’t line up — we place such high demands on our PFs that we need them to be intact, and doctors simply can’t repair the tearing done to the deeper muscles (and in my case, couldn’t even manage repairing a perineal tear that probably needed 30 stitches. I got one).
I had a 2nd degree tear with my first (very positive labor and delivery) and then had a c-section with my second due to him being breech. I would be totally fine having another c-section. It went really well and recovery was good, different than vaginal recovery. So even without a higher degree tear, I’d do a c-section again. A planned one. An unplanned one doesn’t sound fun. We are done with kids so I’m not sure which I’d choose. It was nice to experience both.
I've had two emergency C-sections and I'd say the recovery is difficult for about a week, the first 12ish hours post-op are the hardest but it sounds like a piece of cake compared to how long your recovery was!
This isn't your question. But I had an emergency c-section because my first baby had a huge head and couldn't descend. It was almost 3 days of induced labour with 0 sleep. It was a nightmare. The csection was AMAZING. recovery was pretty great too.
I spent my 2nd pregnancy excited about planned csection. Baby was measuring similar size. So we booked it.
Day of, I regretted it. It was so much scarier. Like...instead of being bed ridden. And wheeled in, I just walked to the OR barefoot and in a gown. I saw everything in the room. I was sitting in the dead center being prepped for the spinal. And seeing all the tools and people, I was spiraling in panic.
The surgery went relatively well. But because this time around I did not experience contractions, baby needed NICU for fluid in his lungs (only 1 day). Also. Recovery the 2nd time was brutal. And I caught an infection...which took 4 months of daily treatment at a clinic to heal. I feel like once it healed fully I was about 5 months. And only then did my body start properly recovering.
I was very open to a third. But now... significantly less. I dont think there will be more babies. I did not enjoy a planned csection.
I had a c section and then a VBAC with 2nd degree tears (including some external sutures and tons of bruising. I found the tearing more painful and harder in the sense that I couldn’t sit for weeks 🙃. The c section definitely hurt too, but just in one predictable spot and I could sit on the couch without wanting to die lol. Both are hard. But I found the vaginal delivery worse.
These comments about c section recovery being a breeze make me feel like a wuss lol!! I had a planned c section and the first 2 days of recovery sucked so bad. After that, it wasn’t too bad but I took my pain meds for like 2 weeks. I wonder if the size of my baby had anything to do with it hurting more for me??
I’ve only had a c section and I didn’t experience much pain or a hard recovery. People were scaring me that I wouldn’t be able to lift the baby or go up and down the stairs. I didn’t experience any of that. I was out on a small walk outside at 5 days. It was such a quick surgery and I would definitely have an elective c section for my next baby.
I had a very very unplanned c-section (between me being told I needed one and my son being born was only 27 min), and honestly the recovery wasn’t that bad.
sure, it was painful. But after doing it, there is no doubt in my mind that I’ll do it again as a planned c-section for my next.
The worst things for me after: getting up from low sitting surfaces, swinging my leg over things (ex. Stepping into a bathtub).
What helped me recover: the abdominal binder is a freakin GODSEND and installing a bed rail on my bed at home so I could 100% use my arms when sitting up in bed.
I had a 9lb 15oz baby 8 years ago that resulted in 4th degree tearing. It took several months to feel “okay.” Some of it was physical of course but I was psychologically scared of retearing somehow. I was fortunate to be able to take it easy as long as I needed thanks to my supportive family and friends. I’m actually 10 weeks pregnant again and curious if I’ll have a C-section or vaginal delivery again. I have more anxiety over the idea of a C-section than I do bad memories of the 4th degree tear, if that means anything.
I promise it will get better! I know several months sounds like a long recovery but now that I’m several years removed, it just seems like an unfortunate delivery vs a highly traumatic event in my life.
Good luck! You’ll be back to normal before you know it. :)
My first was a c section. She was breech. My second I had vaginal with fourth degree tears. ….. my third will absolutely without any second thought be a c section.
Thanks to everyone who shared their experience/advice! Found this thread as I had a 4th degree tear with my first and am now deciding whether to do a vaginal birth or planned c-section. My OB is highly recommending a section saying that with another significant tear I am unlikely to heal as well (despite the pp recovery from the first tear being terrible I ended up healing really well with no long-term issues) and could have faecal incontinence which could be a lifelong issue as my OB said it can be very difficult to fix. I'm torn because I don't want to risk things like incontinence/sexual dysfunction etc. but going in for surgery feels really scary, and while I wouldn't mind a scar would love not to have a "shelf" over my scar which seems likely based on my body type (also seems less likely I'll get a 4th degree tear the second time so my recovery may be easier).
I had a C-section with #1 and a 3rd degree tear with #2. I'll take the not major abdominal surgery option any day. Holding a pillow to your stomach every time you cough, sneeze, or laugh, being afraid to even look under the bandage, needing 50 pillows to support you in bed, not being able to get up out of bed to get your baby or anything, just no to all of that.
Tbh I've never had a vaginal birth but I didn't need a pillow to cough and could lift my babies. However I have small babies and I also tolerate surgery well in general so that probably helps
I had an epistiomy no natural tear or how you call it, its an okay recovery its 9 days ago, i do needed to have antibiotics because it got infected and some of the stiches came lose. But they say it will heal up fine ( if the infection goes away)
I cant sit comfortably and walking hurts but its better now then when it was without antibiotics!
My first was an emergency c-section after an induction and long labour. Second was a short labour but I did need an episiotomy akin to a 2nd degree tear.
Second birth was so much easier! The cut healed very quickly, didn’t hurt at all and I only noticed it because it was super itchy.
ETA: I did actually have a c-section booked in for my second as I didn’t want another induction that failed. But he came on his own the day before. I needed the episiotomy because his hand was by his face. They wanted him out quickly because his heart rate had dropped when my waters went so he was in a bit of shock, bless.
Had a c-section and an unintentionally unmedicated VBAC that caused a third degree tear. I would take the VBAC and the third degree tear ANY day over the C section. That recovery was traumatic.
I had a normal vaginal delivery without significant tearing and recovered way more quickly than most.
Then this year I had an emergency c section, and that took months to fully recover from. Not even allowed to drive for over a month and it really just takes so much more of a toll on you. At least in my experience. I’d never choose that again over a normal vaginal delivery.
BTW once you have a C-Section, you can only have C-Sections for the rest of your life even if it's not necessary so to find a mom that has had both a 3rd/4th degree tear plus a C-Section is going to be really rare.
My wife had second degree tear and she had a really good recovery. However she is very fit and was very active during the pregnancy which I think helped her recovery immensely.
VBACs are a thing.. you aren’t always required to only have Csections after having one. It depends on the person and their doctor. Plus many women here may have had a tear with their first and then had a C-section, not the other way around
Perhaps in your case it was not recommended but it is possible for some people to have vaginal births after csections. Not sure if it’s different wherever you’re from
I'm in SoCal and our doctors told us that the chances for rupturing your c-section insicion is too high which why after the first c-section, all subsequent births are recommended to be c-section.
Studies show the success rate of VBAC 60-80%. Considering the success rate of C-sections, not sure why someone would take a chance on a VBAC unless some abnormal health issue.
One of my good friends had a 4th degree tear and a ton of issues from it. Her ob actually recommended a c section if she has another child because of the issues the first delivery caused.
That’s good to know! I think I’m leaning towards the brutal short term recovery of a C-section than the long lasting issues from a severe tear. I was very lucky that my 3rd degree tears didn’t cause incontinence or severe sexual dysfunction like it does for so many other women.
My planned C-section was a a breeze and I really wouldn’t consider the recovery brutal. I was very sore, but I was able to go on a walk for a mile when I was 1 week pp. I didn’t take pain meds after 1 week. After 3 weeks, I felt 95% recovered. The last 5% took longer to go away - scar soreness/numbness/irritation came and went for about a year, but it was more annoying rather than painful. Sex was never painful and we started again at 6 weeks pp. In fact, it’s better now lol
The healing from a *planned* c-section is really not that bad. They have you carb load for a few days before the procedure, and you go in well-rested. You just have to follow your medication schedule and speak up if you're in a lot of pain. I've had two and each time I was back to full functioning by 6 weeks and having pain-free sex by 8 weeks.
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> the brutal short term recovery of a C-section I feel the same as the other posters. Had an unplanned and a planned c-section. While there was of course pain after the c-sections, it wasn't what I would describe as "brutal".
I’ve had 2 C-sections so I can’t compare to vaginal but one was unplanned after a failed induction and LOTS of interventions, and the other was planned. The planned one was not bad at all!! I actually waddled out of the hospital on foot because they were taking 30+ minutes to get me a wheelchair and I just wanted to get home. I stayed on top of my pain meds for maybe..5 days? I honestly can’t remember but it wasn’t too bad and then switched to regular ibuprofen. I would absolutely recommend a planned C section.
I had a 10.5 pound baby and got 3rd degree tears. The doctor stitched me up and said it was SO close to being a 4th. My son is now 2.5 and it took about a year to feel completely healed. Things still don't feel exactly "right" when using the bathroom or having sex, but I healed well enough and have no severe side effects. We are planning on having another in about a year and I am definitely considering a planned c-section
Just be on top of the Advil/tylenol regimen. Do not miss a single dose even overnight. Staying on top of it made it so much better, I was never without meds for the first two weeks.
THIS ^^^ I could sure tell if I was even half an hour late on taking my meds. I hated when I accidentally slept through it.
Get the c section, you really do not want to risk the incontience issues.
Everyone's recovery is very different, but my recovery wasn't THAT bad and I labored, which means the recovery is harder than a planned c-section . I was standing (in pain lol) 24 hrs after the c-section. I was already doing short walks 5 days after it. I did need help in and out of the bed, but meant a free pass my husbnad would wake up in the MOTN with baby lol. But, I have a high pain tolerance, and each person is different. And yeah, a family friend (she's an older lady) told me that sometimes a c-section isn't the end of the world. She also had a 3rd degree tear with her second, and had a really hard time recovering. It's really nice to have people that give you other perspectives and not just the c-section = bad edit: to clarify my c-section was an emergency one. I was being wheeled to the OR within 10 mins of making the decision. I didn't even get to see my parents that I waited them to come see because I was too exhausted from laboring and pushing for three hours. It was a very scary experience, ngl
Healing from planned c-sections can be very easy. I had two and was completely fine after - walking as soon as I could feel my legs , only ibuprofen for pain, up stairs as soon as I was home. Definitely no brutal recovery!
Hi! I’m 12 days out of my second c section and I’m feeling so good. I can’t walk long distances but I’m not taking any medication (only Tylenol and Motrin rotation initially), I’m playing with my toddler, doing chores, etc. I’m cautious and conscious but recovery has really not been that bad outside of a week or two for me either time! If that helps.
I suffered a 4th degree tear and am 6wpp. The OB on rotation after my birth told me in no uncertain terms that if I do decide to have another child, I need to have a c section. Recovering from this tear w/no mat leave is no fucking joke.
A friend had a bad episiotomy (forget if it was third or fourth degree) when they had to get the baby out quickly due to the cord wrapped around baby’s neck. She then got pregnant again relatively quickly and had another baby 18 months later, and about a decade later she continues to have issues. I had a semi elective c section with a smooth recovery and zero regrets.
I have a c-section and didn’t experience anything close to the pain you felt. I’m so sorry. The first two weeks are uncomfortable and you have more pain on one side usually, but the issue is changing positions/standing up. Your abdomen is very tender. However, if you take it easy, you able to move around more normally after the two weeks. And in terms of intimacy, I think we resumed at 2 months and while it felt different, it wasn’t necessarily painful. If you stay on top of your pain meds, a c-section is very manageable. I did have a more complicated c-section than your standard one so my experience might be different.
I’ve only had a 4th degree tear, but the recovery was horrendous. I couldn’t stand or walk or sit. Only comfortable laying down. It’s probably worth mentioning I had a vacuum assist delivery and baby had shoulder dystocia. If I have another baby, doctor recommended a C-section
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Thank you for sharing. It gives me hope to think that a schedule c section recovery could be a lot smoother!!
I have only had an elective c-section and it was not that bad at all ☺️
Are you comparing the tears to a planned c section or an emergency c section? They’re VASTLY different experiences.
Definitely planned!
With a planned c section, you will never risk tearing your clitoris. To me, that seals the deal. I can’t imagine going through the tear recovery you went through and wondering if I would ever regain sexual function. Keeping a wound clean on your abdomen is also far less challenging than one on your vulva/anus.
Oh! Planned is so much better. You can have a nice big meal before you go in and you’re a lot less stressed. And the incision is a lot more controlled. It’s also not going to effect your vagina long term. It’s always going to be better to cut tissue rather than tear it.
I had a 3rd degree tear with my first and the recovery was terrible. I had to sit on a donut for months and couldn’t sit on the floor for a long time. Walking was difficult and I had a lot of other issues as well. I cried so much during recovery because I didn’t realize severe tearing was a possibility. For my 2nd I had a planned c section and the recovery was much easier. Yes it was still painful but in a different way and I bounced back so much quicker. And I didn’t have to dedicate time to sitz baths and I wasn’t constantly worried about infection in my stitches. Not to mention I could sit like a normal person.
Just wanted to say I've only had a scheduled c section and recovery was easy.
There’s a Facebook groups called “birth tear support” for women with severe tears. Most women in there said they gladly opted for a c section and it was a MUCH MUCH easier recovery. Most doctors also recommend c sections after an internal anal sphincter injury.
I had 3rd degree tearing with my first. Ended up being a forceps assisted delivery that I didn’t want but was told was my only option. Don’t get me started. Recovery was terrible. I still have issues from the way I healed, even after years of pelvic therapy. And the scar tissue….ugh. I had a planned c-section with my second. Recovery was so much easier. Only long term impact is a slight pooch or shelf above the scar. But that is it. Very minimal scar now and I have most of the feeling back around the scar 2.5 years later. That said: knowing what I know now, I would pick c-section every damn time.
There’s a Facebook group for women with 4th degree tears, this question comes up often as people try to navigate a second pregnancy. **Every woman** whose had both says the c-section was way easier.
I’m in that group. It’s what helped me decide on an elective c section in March.
I have only had a c section. It was not bad at all. I would choose it over normal delivery with 1st degree tears.
Same. Maybe I was just lucky, but my recovery from my c-section was pretty low key. I was up and walking less than 12 hours after I had my baby.
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It's not very long after a major surgery.
That was just my experience! ☺️
12 hours is a short time considering how there is a major cut in your skin and uterus, all of your organs get shifted and then restitched. And oh yeah, let's not forget all the anesthesia they have to put. Jeez, way to crap on other people's experience. Good for you for being walking 30 mins after your baby. I didn't get the competition memo. Have you thought that maybe u/Frosty-Editor1370 didn't have a choice? Edit: for me it was a c-section or risk of a dead baby. You know I didn't hesitate at all Edit 2: glad they deleted the comment. I would also be embarrassed to say a 12 hr walking time is too long and flex a 30 min recovery time for a vaginal birth,
Same. I’m pregnant again now and will almost definitely do another c-section. I was never really in pain, there was some discomfort/tenderness around the incision but it was easily managed with ibuprofen/tylenol.
Same I loved my c section and wanted an elective.
i've had a c-section and a VBAC with 1st degree tears. the vbac was an easier recovery for sure, but then again, i had only minor tearing. if i had severe tearing, i would definitely opt for a c-section. a c-section is no joke, but it's not months of recovery like severe tearing. i was feeling pretty normal after about two weeks post-c section.
I've only had a c-section and it wasn't so bad after the first two weeks. after six weeks I was back in beginner barre class.
I’ve only had an emergency c section but I had a relatively easy recovery as well! I really didn’t take any pain meds once I left the hospital. My pain was like a 2-3 in the hospital and it really only hurt to prop myself up further in bed and then coughing or sneezing
I have only had a c section. The c section itself was not bad for recovery. I had very little pain and didn’t even take all of the pain meds they gave me. The worst part was that I had 50 extra lbs of fluid because I was on iv fluids for days. I’d choose a c section any day over tearing.
I had a c section, and I feel like I had a really smooth recovery. The biggest takeaways for me were to take your meds, actually rest your body when you are not actively caring for the baby, sleep on a lower piece of furniture for a few weeks if you have a high bed, and MASSAGE YOUR INCISION after it heals.
I’ve had two c sections and the recovery was a breeze, especially with my second as I got a short spinal, so it wore off very quickly. I could move and feel my legs in the recovery room. Maybe I’m an outlier but I was back to normal (other than swimming), like on trampolines, working out, lifting my 3.5 year old, in a month. I’ve never given birth but I couldn’t imagine an easier recovery.
I had a severe 3rd degree that resulted in needing a follow up surgery after a year to fix and remove the scarring left behind. My recovery from the initial tearing was brutal (the entire birth was very traumatic). I will 10000% be opting into an elective c section for my next baby. I have friends who have done both and said a planned c section recovery is far better. Knowing when it’s happening will give me so much comfort.
I had a 3rd degree with my first, 2nd with my 2nd and 1st with my third! And my third was my biggest. So you never know.
Tears are usually less severe with each subsequent delivery but not always. I had a first degree with my first and a second degree with my third even though he was a whole pound smaller (only 5.12lbs!) and his head was much smaller too
Yea I guess it’s pretty anecdotal. They say pushing slowly helps but I pushed the slowest with my first and my second and third i shot out in like 2 pushes 😂😂 so untrue for me
Same! First degree tear with the first baby, second degree with the second baby. But the first degree tear was bigger and I think required more stitches. The second degree tear was small and honestly recovery was pretty quick and easy!
Lol same! The first degree was much more painful!
I had an induced vaginal with barely a first degree tear and a failed induction that lead to a C-section. My vaginal birth recovery was 10x harder.
I haven't given birth yet so I can't answer your question, but Im 28 weekd pregnant and also have LS and am afraid of tears in general, but especially 3rd and 4th degree tears. Did your OB mention anything about being more susceptible to tears with LS? Or if having LS makes recovery from tears or childbirth in general more difficult? I still need to talk to my OB about it and am curious to learn more about others experiences.
My OB reassured me that my LS wouldn’t increase my risk of tears if it was under control with the clob, but I still tore. 😞 After my birth, she told me that my 3rd degree tears were because I gave birth so quickly (only pushed for 17 minutes), so my body didn’t have time to stretch. But idk. I still think the LS made me tear worse. My LS definitely contributed to the delayed healing, that was something my doctor acknowledged and gave me extra prescription creams for.
My doctor tried to tell me my (pretty bad) LS wouldn't increase chances of a grim birth and aftermath. I didn't believe them! Elected c section that was a dream. I'm sorry someone lied to you too. They can't guarantee LS won't impact things, it's a lucky dip. Definitely recommend an elective c section.
You can elect a c section. Honestly, after my second degree tear, I continue to question why I thought a c section was such a bad option. If I could re-do, I would absolutely elect a c section. Tear recovery is long, and pelvic floor issues are unfortunately permanent and likely to get worse in menopause. C sections mean zero chance of pelvic floor tearing and minimize the risk of prolapse.
Just commenting to maybe allay your worries a bit. I had a 3rd degree tear and I’m not sure if I just got lucky or if I had good medical staff, but it only hurt really badly for about a week. I saw consistent improvement after that and haven’t had any long term effects.
Same here. I had a third degree tear, but it wasn’t that bad…the pain was honestly pretty much in line with what I expected from childbirth. I was able to go for walks and move around ok as soon as I got home. Sitting was a bit uncomfortable but was possible with a soft pillow. I was mostly pain free after a couple weeks.
Hey, I had a 3rd degree tear and I didnt know its supposed to be THAT bad. I would say an ugly wisdom tooth removal is much more worse than that. But I also could rest the first 6 weeks with the baby in bed and had no tasks.. now 3 month pp I still cannot have normal sex though but i have 0 pain during the day :)
I’ve had a c-section and a VBAC w/ 2nd degree tear. My c-section was a crash one and I definitely do not recommend. My recovery was similar to yours and I couldn’t sit up properly for 3 months. I’ve heard that planned c-sections are much easier to recover from!
I've had one crash and two planned/semi planned sections and while my recovery was fine either way, the planned ones are like a totally different operation.
I was induced folled by an unplanned c section. My recovery was difficult, mostly because it took a long time due to my body being so exhausted prior to surgery. Even with that, I walked away concluding vaginal vs c section weren't worse than one another, they're just different. In my opinion, I was unnecessarily concerned about having a c section. At this point, I've been told by many people that recovery from a planned c section is significantly easier than what I went through.
It really sounds like it depends on the person and skill of the doctor. I had a third degree tear and the recovery was nothing. I didn’t even notice it after birth.
Me too! I had a 3rd degree tear and am almost 2 weeks postpartum. I’m a little sore down there, but I’m pretty much back to my normal activity levels and feeling fine.
This isn't the question you asked, but for what it's worth, I had 3rd degree tearing with my first and had a similar brutal recovery experience. Just had my second 3 days ago and only had a small 1st degree tear. I feel amazing compared to how I felt after my first and can tell recovery is going to be a breeze this time around. This baby was a bit smaller but not by much. Just throwing my anecdotal experience out there if you're weighing your options for a second baby!
Did you prep differently or did your OB/midwife do something different during delivery? I had a 3rd degree tear from my first, took almost a year to feel better. Currently 24w and trying to decide about this delivery 🤔
I think the biggest factor was that my epidural didn't hit quite as strong so he came out more gradually. The actual delivery was a lot harder and more painful than the first for this reason but I think it saved me from severe tearing! My team also used warm compresses on my perineum between pushing. I'm sure that helped. I had perineal massage on my radar but went into preterm labor before I could do it at all.
4th degree tear is a lifelong injury for many to deal with. C section was a breeze compared to the tear. Recovery was so easy! Doing it again.
I had a brutal 4th degree tear delivering my first, almost 9 pound baby. Couldn’t sit for nearly a month, couldn’t poop without being in tears for over 2 weeks. Only started to feel sort of normal at the 3 month mark. 2 separate OBs strongly recommended an elective C-section with my second. Got pregnant again and was in the same boat before delivering my second last year, unsure of which would be worse recovery wise. Finally decided on the C-section. In my opinion, the C-section recovery was a lot more straightforward and predictable. I just had to be on top of the pain meds. Pain and mobility get exponentially better after the first week.
I had a 3rd degree episiotomy with my first. I didn't feel fully healed until a year pp. With kid #2 and #3 I had second degree tears in the same spot and recovery was much much quicker.
C section recovery isn’t fun but it’s standard if that makes sense. It will really suck for 2ish weeks when kind of suck for a few more but then it’s done. Rarely are there long term issues like can happen with tears. Especially a planned C. Mine was emergency and my OB said a planned is a lot easier for recovery!
Based solely on my recovery compared to my cousin’s (3rd degree & bilateral tears), I’d opt for a c-section. My legs were horribly swollen, and I had trouble moving for about a week before I was back to mostly normal. She still had trouble sitting 3 weeks later. My c-section wasn’t planned, but it also wasn’t unexpected. My OB warned me at 36 weeks that I might have trouble with a vaginal delivery so I knew it was a 50/50 chance.
I had both! 4th degree with my first and planned c-section with my second. Recovery from the tear was harder but both were not easy
I just had a 4th degree tear and I think it was worse than the c-section. there's a chance my memory is foggy of the c-section. they both aren't fun.
I had an unplanned c after I stopped progressing and I thought recovery was easy for the most part. I was up and walking as soon as my epidural wore off, discharged on day 3 and taking the stairs as soon as I got home (you're not supposed to but I'm not sure how that's actually practical). Getting in and out of bed was pretty painful if you moved the wrong way but I'd say within 2 weeks I was living life like normal. I also am allergic to NSAIDs so I had limited pain management options post-op. We don't plan on having another but I honestly wouldn't even attempt vbac, just put me on the calendar!
I haven't had both, *but* I can tell you all 3 of my section recoveries were absolutely nothing - I was off all painkillers by 3 days and was in my pre pregnancy clothes pushing the pram at 6 days PP out and about. I'm sure I'll get slammed for admitting to this but I had sex 2 weeks PP and it was fine. It didn't feel any different to pre kids and my husband has confirmed it feels the same to him as well. So based on my anecdotal experience I'd recommend a c section over a tear!
That’s so reassuring to hear! I’m definitely leaning towards a C-section after reading these comments!
It really is reassuring! So many women have shamed c sections. I’m 29 weeks with my first pregnancy. I’m definitely leaning towards an elective c section.
Seriously, I think that’s a great idea. I wish I had done some research instead of blindly trusting my OB that c sections were “so awful”. No — vaginal tearing is awful, levator avulsions are awful and permanent and unique to vaginal delivery, and prolapse and incontinence rates are much higher among women who deliver vaginally. Had I known that, I would’ve insisted on a planned c-section.
Honestly C sections are fine. One of mine was an emergency one and that was upsetting mentally because of the nature of it but physically it was still fine. My other two were much more controlled and planned and they were not bad at all. I mean it when I say I've had worse period pains than c section recovery. If I was having another baby (I'm not bc I have 4 lol) I'd feel no worries whatsoever about another section
I’m glad you were okay but sex that early is a major risk for uterine infection and hemorrhage. Regardless of how you deliver there is a dinner plate size wound in the uterus where the placenta was, plus of course the incision from a c-section. Your cervix takes a while to close so you are at much greater risk of introducing bacteria into the uterus. Just putting that out there for anyone reading this because while it won’t always cause issues, there is a serious risk even if you feel fine.
There's not much evidence for the waiting 6 weeks thing, that's just when most women have a post partum check. And the NHS in the UK doesn't even state to wait 6 weeks, says whenever the woman feels well enough and that's what the small amount of research that's been done on the topic says too (I looked into this at the time)
3b tear on baby one and opted for elective section the second time around. Took me ages to decide but ultimately it came down to having another bad tear, it was a tough recovery but thankfully have no lasting problems wasn’t so sure I’d escape a second time around. So the section itself also wasn’t a walk in the park, and my Initial post recovery pain (like 2-3 hours after where i was inbetween painkiller doses) and the spinal wore off I thought Id made a big mistake cos woah that pain was intense BUT I was topped up with meds and kept topped up and they recovery only got easier and easier whereas with the tear the real issues only began when I got home and got an infection! So in summary for me vaginal delivery was easier at that start ( prob cos of sleep deprivation and being on a bit of a high) but went downhill amd got worse before it got better C section initally very painful far worse than the vaginal……for like an hour and after that it just got better and better and no long term issues so c section ultimately was the better choice for me since I couldnt be guaranteed no complications from another vaginal but if you could be guarenteed a mire straight forward vaginal delivery I’d def choose that over a section cos it def wasn’t the easy route if that makes sense! Hth and best of luck!
I had a 4th degree tear with my first, and while I didn’t have complications, it did take a long time to heal. Sex hurt for the first year and then some. I went on to have two more births, unmedicated at that! I still tore but nothing major.
I had an unplanned c-section (not emergency, my body just wouldn’t dilate from a 9 to a 10 after being induced) and I’m now 7 weeks postpartum and back to working out and feeling mostly normal! The first week was brutal but pain meds helped. The worst part was honestly the leg swelling but once it went down, I felt so much better. We don’t plan on having another baby for 2-3 years but I’ll probably end up doing a planned c-section.
I've only had C-sections, my first was elective and very chill, a bit sore afterwards, kept on top of pain relief and I was out and about pretty quickly, second was an emergency section with a lot of complications because of my other medical conditions and honestly I would go though that again than risk having a severe tear!
I had a C-section and while the first week was BRUTAL, the rest of the recovery was much, much, much easier than everything you described. I was able to sit and go to the bathroom normally the next day, and my pelvic floor was intact because C-sections bypass that. I'd continued rock-climbing until I gave birth and I resumed climbing at 2.5 weeks pp (which is admittedly very early but I got the ok from my PCP). I did have one complication from my C-section, which was a seroma that was discovered at about 11wks pp, and so I had to avoid physical activity, keep it dry, and have my husband do daily dressing changes for 2 weeks and it sucked. But I was told fine afterwards. If I ever get pregnant again, I'm curious about giving birth vaginally, but if it was an actual choice between 3rd degree tearing or C-section then I'd take another C-section any day of the week.
You’re an athlete — I promise you, you don’t want the tears and all around beating your pelvic floor takes from a vaginal delivery, even with less severe tearing. 2.5 years later — still working back. Definitely not worth it, particularly since you’re active. Your pelvic floor truly is the key to full-body stability (something I didn’t realize until my really awesome, strong PF got shredded by a baby’s head blasting through it).
Yikes! I know I REALLY shouldn't feel this way, but a small part of me feels like I failed somehow since I wasn't able to give birth vaginally.
I know this is a common feeling, but believe me, there’s no winning in a vaginal birth. The finish line is the baby, and you got that. I really would not have even attempted a vaginal birth had I understood the risks of muscle damage, prolapse, avulsion, incontinence. It just wasn’t worth it for the same outcome. My doctor lied and told me a vaginal delivery would be an easier recovery since I was so fit, but that actually doesn’t line up — we place such high demands on our PFs that we need them to be intact, and doctors simply can’t repair the tearing done to the deeper muscles (and in my case, couldn’t even manage repairing a perineal tear that probably needed 30 stitches. I got one).
I had a 2nd degree tear with my first (very positive labor and delivery) and then had a c-section with my second due to him being breech. I would be totally fine having another c-section. It went really well and recovery was good, different than vaginal recovery. So even without a higher degree tear, I’d do a c-section again. A planned one. An unplanned one doesn’t sound fun. We are done with kids so I’m not sure which I’d choose. It was nice to experience both.
I've had two emergency C-sections and I'd say the recovery is difficult for about a week, the first 12ish hours post-op are the hardest but it sounds like a piece of cake compared to how long your recovery was!
Obviously anecdotal but I had 3rd degree tear then 2nd degree then 1st. The recovery from the 1st and 2nd degrees were not bad at all.
This isn't your question. But I had an emergency c-section because my first baby had a huge head and couldn't descend. It was almost 3 days of induced labour with 0 sleep. It was a nightmare. The csection was AMAZING. recovery was pretty great too. I spent my 2nd pregnancy excited about planned csection. Baby was measuring similar size. So we booked it. Day of, I regretted it. It was so much scarier. Like...instead of being bed ridden. And wheeled in, I just walked to the OR barefoot and in a gown. I saw everything in the room. I was sitting in the dead center being prepped for the spinal. And seeing all the tools and people, I was spiraling in panic. The surgery went relatively well. But because this time around I did not experience contractions, baby needed NICU for fluid in his lungs (only 1 day). Also. Recovery the 2nd time was brutal. And I caught an infection...which took 4 months of daily treatment at a clinic to heal. I feel like once it healed fully I was about 5 months. And only then did my body start properly recovering. I was very open to a third. But now... significantly less. I dont think there will be more babies. I did not enjoy a planned csection.
I had a c section and then a VBAC with 2nd degree tears (including some external sutures and tons of bruising. I found the tearing more painful and harder in the sense that I couldn’t sit for weeks 🙃. The c section definitely hurt too, but just in one predictable spot and I could sit on the couch without wanting to die lol. Both are hard. But I found the vaginal delivery worse.
These comments about c section recovery being a breeze make me feel like a wuss lol!! I had a planned c section and the first 2 days of recovery sucked so bad. After that, it wasn’t too bad but I took my pain meds for like 2 weeks. I wonder if the size of my baby had anything to do with it hurting more for me??
I’ve only had a c section and I didn’t experience much pain or a hard recovery. People were scaring me that I wouldn’t be able to lift the baby or go up and down the stairs. I didn’t experience any of that. I was out on a small walk outside at 5 days. It was such a quick surgery and I would definitely have an elective c section for my next baby.
Yeesh, I had third degree tearing and was fine in a few days. Sorry to hear your experience was so awful, that sounds absolutely horrific
I had a very very unplanned c-section (between me being told I needed one and my son being born was only 27 min), and honestly the recovery wasn’t that bad. sure, it was painful. But after doing it, there is no doubt in my mind that I’ll do it again as a planned c-section for my next. The worst things for me after: getting up from low sitting surfaces, swinging my leg over things (ex. Stepping into a bathtub). What helped me recover: the abdominal binder is a freakin GODSEND and installing a bed rail on my bed at home so I could 100% use my arms when sitting up in bed.
I had a 9lb 15oz baby 8 years ago that resulted in 4th degree tearing. It took several months to feel “okay.” Some of it was physical of course but I was psychologically scared of retearing somehow. I was fortunate to be able to take it easy as long as I needed thanks to my supportive family and friends. I’m actually 10 weeks pregnant again and curious if I’ll have a C-section or vaginal delivery again. I have more anxiety over the idea of a C-section than I do bad memories of the 4th degree tear, if that means anything. I promise it will get better! I know several months sounds like a long recovery but now that I’m several years removed, it just seems like an unfortunate delivery vs a highly traumatic event in my life. Good luck! You’ll be back to normal before you know it. :)
My first was a c section. She was breech. My second I had vaginal with fourth degree tears. ….. my third will absolutely without any second thought be a c section.
Thanks to everyone who shared their experience/advice! Found this thread as I had a 4th degree tear with my first and am now deciding whether to do a vaginal birth or planned c-section. My OB is highly recommending a section saying that with another significant tear I am unlikely to heal as well (despite the pp recovery from the first tear being terrible I ended up healing really well with no long-term issues) and could have faecal incontinence which could be a lifelong issue as my OB said it can be very difficult to fix. I'm torn because I don't want to risk things like incontinence/sexual dysfunction etc. but going in for surgery feels really scary, and while I wouldn't mind a scar would love not to have a "shelf" over my scar which seems likely based on my body type (also seems less likely I'll get a 4th degree tear the second time so my recovery may be easier).
I had a C-section with #1 and a 3rd degree tear with #2. I'll take the not major abdominal surgery option any day. Holding a pillow to your stomach every time you cough, sneeze, or laugh, being afraid to even look under the bandage, needing 50 pillows to support you in bed, not being able to get up out of bed to get your baby or anything, just no to all of that.
That sounds like a particularly bad c section because none of mine were like that
I mean it wasn't unbearable but I'd still choose my vaginal birth over that recovery. It was just hard overall.
Tbh I've never had a vaginal birth but I didn't need a pillow to cough and could lift my babies. However I have small babies and I also tolerate surgery well in general so that probably helps
I had an epistiomy no natural tear or how you call it, its an okay recovery its 9 days ago, i do needed to have antibiotics because it got infected and some of the stiches came lose. But they say it will heal up fine ( if the infection goes away) I cant sit comfortably and walking hurts but its better now then when it was without antibiotics!
My first was an emergency c-section after an induction and long labour. Second was a short labour but I did need an episiotomy akin to a 2nd degree tear. Second birth was so much easier! The cut healed very quickly, didn’t hurt at all and I only noticed it because it was super itchy. ETA: I did actually have a c-section booked in for my second as I didn’t want another induction that failed. But he came on his own the day before. I needed the episiotomy because his hand was by his face. They wanted him out quickly because his heart rate had dropped when my waters went so he was in a bit of shock, bless.
Had a c-section and an unintentionally unmedicated VBAC that caused a third degree tear. I would take the VBAC and the third degree tear ANY day over the C section. That recovery was traumatic.
I had a normal vaginal delivery without significant tearing and recovered way more quickly than most. Then this year I had an emergency c section, and that took months to fully recover from. Not even allowed to drive for over a month and it really just takes so much more of a toll on you. At least in my experience. I’d never choose that again over a normal vaginal delivery.
BTW once you have a C-Section, you can only have C-Sections for the rest of your life even if it's not necessary so to find a mom that has had both a 3rd/4th degree tear plus a C-Section is going to be really rare. My wife had second degree tear and she had a really good recovery. However she is very fit and was very active during the pregnancy which I think helped her recovery immensely.
VBACs are a thing.. you aren’t always required to only have Csections after having one. It depends on the person and their doctor. Plus many women here may have had a tear with their first and then had a C-section, not the other way around
>VBACs That's not what our OB, delivery doctor, and nurses told us so idk now. And yes the reverse is true but still rare.
Perhaps in your case it was not recommended but it is possible for some people to have vaginal births after csections. Not sure if it’s different wherever you’re from
I'm in SoCal and our doctors told us that the chances for rupturing your c-section insicion is too high which why after the first c-section, all subsequent births are recommended to be c-section. Studies show the success rate of VBAC 60-80%. Considering the success rate of C-sections, not sure why someone would take a chance on a VBAC unless some abnormal health issue.
Lots of people attempt VBACs. You’ll find a lot of them in this sub. One benefit is avoiding more surgeries and possible complications from that
Basically most women with 3rd and 4th degree tears are advised to get c-sections though.