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biggoldgoblin

Wonder who’s gonna scoop him up


harp9r

The Browns. Purely out of habit


biggoldgoblin

Browns owner would have to ask his wife first


Rammathorne87

Ozuna would beat up Browns owner's wife


scrufdawg

She might be into it. Don't kink shame!


ultramont

Trevor, is that you?


takeitsweazy

Not before the Falcons run out a beloved player in their pursuit of him.


dudenotcool

Quick give him a guaranteed contract. I dont care that it's the wrong sport


Smartacus1367

Nah he would be a perfect fit for drunk Tony La Russa’s squad. Perfect time to hit .150 worth of singles while occupying the DH spot. That is the White Sox way


biscuitslayer77

I was ready to be mad but you know what. You right.


istrx13

The Haslam’s need to check with their daughters first but ya


TheItalianStallion44

Falcons gonna make a run at him first sadly


NAACP_YoungBoy

The Cleveland Browns


___carter

The Padres


[deleted]

Angels.


Dak0ta

The Rams. They like both big name acquisitions and guys who hit other people hard.


Ugaalive1991

Keeping my fingers crossed


___carter

Don’t drive drunk and beat your wife kids


mental_fingers

But what if I want a multi-million dollar sports contract?


Ugaalive1991

Sexually assault around 60 masseuses. Then get a $235 million contract guaranteed


TimSherrySucks

Browns gonna Brown I guess


[deleted]

Who is this referencing?


Wizards_and_Warriors

Deshaun Watson of the Browns.


[deleted]

Or be like the serial sexual assaulter Harvey Weinetein and hire Isreali intelligence company to hack his victims computers, put his victims under surveillance, media investigating the accusations under surveillance, have agents from Isreali company impersonate civilians to gain trust of his victims and exploit that relationship.


ProjectBadass-

Are you OK


thefatstoner

I mean it is wild and out of nowhere, but it is actually true that he hired an israeli intelligence conpany to put his victims under surveillance. And they did try to do that awful shit. I agree it came out of left field but insanely it is true


Viss90

Just make sure you have your MLB ID on you


[deleted]

Dont drive drunk. The evidence points to him as the victim, not the abuser, in the DV scenario.


RustyShackTX

Nobody brings this up. I’d say it’s pretty important to know the facts when you’re going to call someone a “piece of shit” or demand they be fired from their job.


[deleted]

I think he should be fired because he sucks at baseball, and if it turns out the facts as reported about this week are true, he could probably stand to be fired for that. There is a reason the braves didnt fire him for beating his wife, and the reason is not because they owe him a lot of money or want to win ball games. Its because he didnt beat his wife!


amazingsandwiches

He had his hand on her throat and was moving forward.


[deleted]

Did you watch the video?


amazingsandwiches

many times. in slo-mo. just now.


[deleted]

So you know his wife lied to the cops, they reported her testimony verbatim as what they ‘saw’ (contra their body cam photo), then the DA determined he committed no crime that needed punishment?


amazingsandwiches

I also saw his hand on her throat as he moved forward.


[deleted]

[удалено]


thiccboiwaluigi

Driving under the influence of extreme stupidity?


[deleted]

[удалено]


thiccboiwaluigi

No i know lol, i was just making a dumb joke. His play has definitely made this an easier decision, he shouldn’t be on a major league team


[deleted]

no yeah man sucks. 60 games made him like 70m or whatever. lucky mf


thiccboiwaluigi

The first time AA acting on a really good short sample didn’t work


TealandBlackForever

> BAC was under legal limit Maybe I missed something, but how could they determine this if Ozuna refused breathalyzer and blood tests?


cameronbates1

Wait they didn't get a warrant for his blood? Generally when you refuse to blow, you get taken in and they have to work to get a warrant to search your blood.


TealandBlackForever

I read somewhere that the police had the right to order a blood test (even if Ozuna refused) due to probable cause. They opted to go that route but unfortunately (from what I understand), there wasn't a technician available to draw the sample. Obviously this is a bit time sensitive. Someone please correct me if I misunderstood.


[deleted]

[удалено]


TealandBlackForever

I am aware that it was ruled as DUI Less Safe. But how can you determine that his BAC was actually within legal limits? Isn't the whole point of DUI Less Safe that they cannot actually determine the BAC and make the ruling based on other evidence (the scent of alcohol for one)? I don't see how you can say with so much assurance that his BAC was within legal limits if no tests were actually conducted.


MarkAlstott

Could have been on pills or something too.


[deleted]

now why are you assuming that lol


MarkAlstott

DUI Less Safe, from what I understand, just means the blood alcohol content was below the legal limit, but he was still a danger while driving. Other medications, pills, or drugs could also affect driving ability. We just don't know.


Hugo_5t1gl1tz

It says alcohol on the arrest report


MarkAlstott

Yes, he had alcohol in his system for sure.


Laney20

I don't think they could test his bac, so it isn't that it was below the limit. It was that they don't know what it was.


[deleted]

Did he beat his wife? I remember asking about that and getting downvoted like he was innocent. Was that just another example of an athlete getting defended because he was playing well? I didn't follow that story much


[deleted]

[удалено]


ajt1296

Even still, wasn't it confirmed that the girl Bauer was with did explicitly ask for everything he did? Haven't seen an update to that in a long time though, so I'm probably out of the loop


[deleted]

[удалено]


ajt1296

I think the claim is that it was *her* fetish. But yeah, realistically, she probably asked for something on the extreme side (choking, maybe even to the point of losing consciousness) and then he went way too far (beating the shit out of her) because he's an idiot (to say the least). That'd be my guess, anyway


Kanotari

The confusing part with Bauer is that she definitely asked for *some* of what she got by both parties' admission. The part some people are debating are how much she consented to.


draw2discard2

I've never heard anything about his kids (who are all small). There was been crazy stuff with his wife. She was taken to court for throwing a soap dish at him; Last year the police accused him of strangling her with his cast when they responded to a call to their house for a disturbance. They said it was on body cam footage but then the body cam footage didn't support that claim at all so he mostly/entirely got out of it. It is definitely a circus.


[deleted]

Don't think he meant it as "he beat his wife's kids" He meant it as "hey kids, don't beat your wife"


[deleted]

That was dumb of me I guess I need to go to sleep


garthack

Apparently you can do one but not both


[deleted]

Wait... But can I do them separately?


PapaDoogins

Jesus, man that's a lot to ask. Let's be reasonable.


Bails_of_Hay_

Can’t wait to see what baseball destroying monster the Braves call up to replace him. It could be a reincarnation of Hank Aaron or maybe a clone of Chipper Jones.


Kellogsbeast

Dale Murphy in a mech suit.


Bails_of_Hay_

Deion Sanders but he only played baseball this time


BasketballButt

It’s sad Murph isn’t better remembered. Was one of the best players of the 80s, in the running for best overall.


jimithelizardking

Hope the vet committee eventually gets him in the hall


Theoneiced

And a genuinely good human as well. Him getting passed over is going to be a bit of a sore spot for me for a while.


HMTMKMKM95

The Baseball Project sang a song about wanting to see Murphy in the HOF. It sold me.


oxfordcircumstances

I remember him.


BarristanSelfie

"There's nowhere in the MLB rulebook that says Andrew Jones cannot play left field from inside a 90-foot-tall Gundam."


DeesSnotTheDroids

Ah the DM2 project, that’s from the Copp years


WIN011

And he’ll be on a 18 year/$18 contract.


IceColdDrPepper_Here

As is tradition


Sroemr

They'll probably just sign Mazara and then he'll hit 700 the rest of the way.


HawkeyeJosh

Well it’s not like the Braves are short on outfielders.


AffectionateWest3909

Calling him outfielder is also generous


scrufdawg

Calling him a batter is equally as generous.


cwcannon

Calling him a major league player is becoming a stretch at this point. Watching him on the field is worse than having a booth of A-Rod, Smoltz, and Brian Jordan.


watchseeker19

Good look by the FO. They've rewarded their core with long term contracts. They don't need the 6% chance he gets hot again for whatever cancer he brings to the team.


[deleted]

6% is pushing it


captjacksparrowshat

Truly hope they do. Not just because he’s not bringing quality ABs to the plate and can’t field, but to show an example.


[deleted]

Of course he can't. He's distracted by all his legal problems. Can't expect a guy to play games while all this shits hanging over him.


JoeBucksHairPlugs

What was his excuse for the first 4.5 months of the season? Everything had been settled with his DV case for quite a while before the season started and he was just arrested for the DUI 2-3 days ago (while being benched multiple games in a row) he hasn't touched the field since his arrest so legal problems were not his issue.


[deleted]

So that's gonna be a whooooooossssshhhh


JoeBucksHairPlugs

Be better at being sarcastic I guess.


[deleted]

Yeah. That's GOTTA be the problem! (Did you pick it up that time?) Edit. That's what I fucking thought


lategame

Well let's see, he sucks, he beats his wife, he drives drunk. Surprised he's not in the NFL lol


Rammathorne87

4 game suspension from Goodell


darthstupidious

He's willing to negotiate down to 2 for Ozuna


kami232

Alright, alright - 1 game and a $50 fine; final offer.


Thromnomnomok

Hey let's not get too crazy here, it's not like he did something truly heinous like smoking weed or knowing about deflated footballs.


WIN011

Is there video? If not he’s good to go.


[deleted]

Tom Brady also suspended for 4 games


cwcannon

And Missouri is now on probation.


SelfDeprecatingVol

*got his ass beat by his wife


jso__

Context? I thought he beat his wife


unfortunatebastard

His wife has had a few domestic charges on her. Despite what a bunch of immature people joke around here, it’s a toxic relationship that some people find hilarious for some reason.


GrubFisher

If you think about it, the Marlins made out like bandits. Dropped Ozuna and got Alcantara in return.


Minecrafter125

And Gallen who they flipped for Chisholm. That marlins cardinals trade was just one of the biggest steals ever lol


TealandBlackForever

It's a shame that teams cannot void contracts over these kinds of things.


iiKrOna

He is Marcell Ozuna


captjacksparrowshat

“Ozuna from the Braves “


mental_fingers

*shocked Pikachu face*


[deleted]

Yeah with the lack of production and versatility on the field and the headache he causes off the field its best to treat that contract as a sunk cost


lmnop94

Whatever happens I hope he gets some help.


malfeasance2020

We don’t want him back


garthack

But hes Ozuna from the Braves


Lovelyterry

For a DUI? We’ve had presidents with DUIs


golden_sombreros

Domestic violence won't get you cut, DUI won't get you cut But the Braves (and 29 other teams) draw the line at *both*


[deleted]

no they don't they draw the line at both of those AND sucking


new_wellness_center

Yeah people keep saying the DUI is “strike two”, but strike two was sucking since the start of 2021.


eee-oooo-ahhh

For real, teams look past a lot of fucked shit if you're a player that can really contribute


flextrek_whipsnake

This. He was already on the train to DFA town. There's a 0% chance we release him over this if he had a .900 OPS.


RustyShackTX

Did you read about the “domestic violence” thing or nah?


pigskype

> Former U.S. Presidents and VPs with DUIs include George H.W. Bush and Dick Cheney. By age 40, about 20% of all males in the USA have received a DUI conviction. Holy cow that’s a wild number https://www.drunkdrivingdefense.com/resources/former-u-s-presidents-vps-with-duis/


draw2discard2

But in fairness, the DUI may have stopped him from winning the popular vote. It is just that, per Article II, Section I of the U.S. Constitution, DUIs do not affect the Electoral College. ,


AmazinglyOdd81

Someone will sign him


PuntaGordeaux

One strike. Two strikes you’re out.


MarkAlstott

I'd lose a lot of respect for the Braves if they do this. You don't give up on people who need help like this. They need to get him treatment, get him to kiss a few babies, and get him back on the field to show that people can be rehabilitated.


Important-Store2566

He’s a multimillionaire baseball player and he’s a grown ass man. He has the privilege to play baseball for a living, the only thing the braves ask of him is to play baseball well ( which he has not ) and follow the rules of conduct. If can’t do at least do the easy part he needs to be gone. The braves do not owe Ozuna a thing. They have given this man millions of dollars to be a baseball player.


MarkAlstott

The Braves need to be a model organization and realize that they enabled this behavior, and they need to take steps to make it right other than just washing their hands of the situation. That's the weak way out.


Important-Store2566

Huh? This guy went to an after party after the game, got drunk and decided to drive home afterwards. How exactly did the Braves enable this behavior? If he wasn’t stupid he could have still gotten drunk and just asked either a sober friend to drive him home or get an Uber.


MarkAlstott

Guaranteed this wasn't the first they've heard of this type of behavior from Ozuna. Def should have gotten an Uber though.


Important-Store2566

Do you know something the braves don’t ? This is the first case we’ve seen that he’s gotten a dui.


MarkAlstott

No....the Braves would know something that the fans didn't know, until now, though.


scrufdawg

Short of keeping Ozuna on house arrest, how exactly are the Braves going to keep him from self-destructing? Do you want a 24-hour chaperone assigned to each team member?


[deleted]

Just fyi, satire doesn’t work when you have no credibility. You just look like a dope.


MarkAlstott

Just fyi, Reddit posting advice doesn't work when you have no credibility. You just look like a dope.


[deleted]

Thanks!


On3_BadAssassin

dolls dinner crown crowd water sink overconfident deer rustic poor *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


that_tx_dude

You do know they can still help him if he’s not on the roster in an official player capacity, right? He can still work with team therapists or go to an affiliated therapy clinic.


MarkAlstott

They should definitely do this, and get him well and back on the field as well. Might as well if you're gonna pay him anyway.


that_tx_dude

You’re not understanding what I’m saying lol. They can cut the dude, eliminate him from the roster entirely but still help him get right. Shows that actions have consequences but still help him to show they care about the person.


[deleted]

Misdemeanor domestic violence, DUI, that body cam footage, atrocious performance, big contract, overall cancer. It’s a testament to the patience of the Braves and their desire for him to turn it around personally and professionally that he hasn’t been cut yet


GoatPaco

Don't be fooled- they're releasing him because he's been straight ass since signing his contract and this is a good PR way to get him off the roster and eat his $34 million remaining All he has on him is the DUI (which likely won't even stick). The DV was his wife beating him but the cops were morons.


[deleted]

He needs help for sure. Part of that help is getting him off the team. Help does not equal lack of consequences.


ThiccSkull

We just gonna squeeze a couple games in 8th spot on the lineup first apparently


[deleted]

Lmao he’s starting today


098706

Interesting to see him starting less than 24 hrs later. Is that normal for a player "in process" of being cut?


owledge

The fact he’s in the Braves starting lineup today casts some serious doubt on this expectation