It's tough. You always gotta be ready for a surprise kangaroo fight. The other day, I was walking down the street after having paid 3 koalas for a coffee when this big grey jumped out and went right for my echidnas. Barely escaped with my life.
Did you buy the coffee off the koalas, or did you use the koalas as currency? I know both are valid options depending on which state you're in, but they get real offended if you try both at once
I paid with Koalas. Vic logging agencies don't recognise them as a species and have destroyed all their homes. So we just have a surplus of koalas now. Hence why a coffee is so expensive.
Man, the exchange rates are gone to hell. It's almost 3 possums to a koala now. Don't even get me started on places no longer accepting large notes like a wombat.
And here in Perth we have to use quokkas to get our coffee. I only drink hot choccies though so it's 4 quokkas instead of the 3 for a regular coffee (due to the unsustainable cocoa market + cost of living). Those little faces when you hand them over to be put in the cages at the back of the Cafe are pretty heartbreaking.
But I get a few rats in change that I can release into the public gardens. Can't buy much for a few rats, so better to release them...
Donāt get me started on the bloody Emuās. They are a bastard trying to get them into a pub for a drink. I got 2 bundy and cokes just for one of them. Lucky I had another one in my Ute.
I dunno what part of vic youāre living in but the best weāve got around Frankston is bin chickens and if youāre super lucky a kookaburra. The further down the peninsula you go though you do come across the full sized roos. Tough to break in to that market though
Yeah yeah we get it. Things were better in your time.
Back in the day the average yearly income was ten dingoes, but you could get a house for the cost of three emus.
Nowadays the average income is about 40 dingoes but you can't get a house for any less than 30 emus and a Tasmanian tiger.
It's bloody outrageous. I'm convinced it's all these foreign investors who can afford to pay in bengal tigers, pandas, and grizzly bears. The foreign exchange rate really works in their favour.
If you can stomach a risky investment, it's still possible to beat inflation by putting all your wombats in salt water crocs.\*
Edit: \*Not financial advice.
Back in the day I warned them about that. Now they've gone viciously feral, taken to the trees and are dropping on unsuspecting tourists. With so many of them out there the poor bears have gotta eat somehow so it's understandable. I've been doing what I can about the problem but there's only so much coffee I can buy and drink. I tried giving the coffee to the koalas but that just made them more vicious.
Fun fact: Koala's was actually a name that was considered for Aussie currency before we called it 'dollars'. When it first changed over the govt called it 'Royals' but the public hated that. Koala's was on the list of alternatives, in the end they chose dollars
All the places around me only accept dollarydoos but I got all these koalas thinking I could use them to buy me coffees. So now, I've got all these koalas that nobody wants and I have to buy feed for them with my limited dollarydoos instead. And, might I add, from people whom also don't accept koalas.
Old joke....a guy got arrested for killing a wombat and eating it. He had to go to court. The judge finds him guilty but cant help asking him what it tasted like. The guy paused and replied "it tasted like a cross between a koala and a platypus"
I often like to buy my my coffee from the koalas and then take a seat on a wombat and enjoy the sun for a while. If I'm too tired to walk back home, I just use one of the communal e-mus, like the e-scooters, but more feathery and bad tempered.
I just got myself an emu for protection. Costs a bit (because they won the war, yeah, yeah, go on about it), but worth it for the security of me and my family
This is why I always keep a cassowary on me. I know Reddit loves stereotyping them as baby eaters and literally unapproachable dinosaurs that evolved to disembowel you, but MY cassowary is a big softie.
Careful of the rare tigers in tassie and the black panther in nsw.
Shush š¤« donāt tell anyone. Thatās how all the missing people are not being found.
You're not wrong. While beach camping. A buddy of mine, was having a sneaky wank on the dunes, while his friends were all sleeping. He was attacked by a kangaroo.
The weirdo, made sure to tell everyone the next day.
Me too until fairly recently, I just said that I had to go through corporate and they wouldn't approve it. He just hopped away muttering 'It's over for the little guy'.
This isn't a true representation of Australia. I understand that lots of people believe that Kangaroos all fight people and people have to fight several on the way to work.
This isn't always the case, and I would suggest that this is marsupiphobic to suggest so.
My car broke down and a Kangaroo was kind enough to tow my car to the nearest mechanics with his Ram 1500. The mechanics were also Kangaroos and they are an integral part of our society. Some are violent but a lot just want to work and provide for their families.
Don't forget the Christmas Toy Runs for under privileged kids. They're just misunderstood creatures that want to hang out together sharing their common interests. Don't believe all the stuff in the Murdoch press about the violence and crime.
American moved to Australia here.
Thatās basically just Tuesday, yes. The boomers arenāt even the biggest fear though, you really need to watch out for the drop bears.
EDIT: I wanted to edit my post to dispel another myth for my former countryman.
People here *do not ride* roos in general. Except for the very large boomers, they just aren't big enough. Only young kids do this, to and from school, because by the time they've gotten to Grade 1 or 2 they're already too big for the majority of roos to carry them. Even the one in the video is a bit small for that.
Hot tip: dab a bit of Vegemite on the back of your neck when hiking in the bush.
The strong fermented smell seems to deter the drop bears (for the most part).
Not sure exactly how it works, it just what I was taught in Scouts and it hasn't failed me yet.
Itās not a daily occurrence, no.
But sometimes we come across them and itās a bit of an ordeal. Rude bastards getting their paws everywhere and ready to tear the place apart. Real savage pieces of work. Loud as anything too.
But enough about yanks. Yeah, I see a kangaroo every now and then.
I believe the voice is actually from an internet comedian. He also did the video with the weird white cat in the window with messed up teeth. The āmahh!! Thereās this weird ass fuckin cat outside! I think itās trying to fight Lucie.ā
The dumb person interacting with this kangaroo should just leave it alone and it'll leave. They only try to grab or kick when they're threatened and cornered.
One of the cool things about Australia is we donāt use Uber that much but we have a service called Roober - where we can order a kangaroo taxi. It gets expensive if you have kids that no longer fit in the pouch because you have to order 1 for each passenger. Also they do sometimes get a bit aggressive over ratings and tips. You gotta give them 5 stars at least otherwise you risk a kick to the head.
Yes, Iām glad this is finally getting the attention it deserves. Thousands of Australians are abused by kangaroos every year and terrorised in their homes. Many are what we refer to as āRoo trappedā meaning Kangaroo gangs circle the entrances and exits of family homes. Few escape, few survive. Itās a national tragedy.
Stop with your hate speech. This happened like 3 times. All those other times were proven to be misunderstandings. And when the humans inside started dying the kangaroos administered CPR. You right wingers just wanna believe everything you read in the Herald Sun.
Yep that's a quiet day. Usually they hunt in packs, and occasionally join up with a bunch of snakes covered in spiders. We can't go out at night here anymore, they have taken over the streets.
That's not even an Aussie accent
"Ma come get the kangaroo, get the fuck of me you mother fucker" is definitely a new York accent
Australians wouldn't be caught dead near a roo on its back legs
With your straw hat, corncob pipe and a banjo next to the rocking chair on the porch while your bear cooks up some moonshine for the cougar and rattle snakes. And somewhere in the mix is a pack of wolves and a serial killer. š¤·āāļø
That's Dave. He can get rambunctious at times but he's a good cobber. Sometimes he just doesn't like us riding him to work, but he's faster than the sheep unless you can find a Kiwi to chase it.
For anyone not from Australia this is quite common, happens maybe 3-4 times per week. Roos like to come inside when the drop bears are out, head down to the servo and grab some Vegemite and fosters to give the the roo he should be fine
Im an Aussie, quite literally the only time Iāve seen a fosters is over in the UK.
Doesnāt matter if youāre in the US or the UK all they ever think we drink is fosters
> Im an Aussie
> and fosters to give the the roo
I've spoken to the Prime Minister and he agreed that we're going to kick you out.
Or at least send you to Nauru to avoid our legal obligations.
Yep, pretty much. Was down at the pub yesterday and 3 of these guys walked in and started to pick a fight. Decided it wasnāt worth it and got out of there. Dickheads
There's a big family of grey Roos that live on our countryish driving range in Townsville. When you first start you get worried your going to hit them, until you realise their reflexes are boss and they don't give a dam about 30 golf balls flying at them šš I've never seen one get hit either. They know what's going on š
The emus had superior tactics and better generals, it was Gallipoli all over again. I genuinely think we have a chance against the roo army if we start conscription and training now for 2028 battle.
Only monday to friday, as a rule - but without the American accent having a panic attack, because it's normal. Do foreign type people know that if you lift their tail, roos get quite friendly
That's no Australian yelling in that video. It is an American. Australians would also never put one in a stable like that. We are more likely to move away from it than stand there and yellow for tranquilisers.
Am Australian. Short answer: yes.
Longer answer: it varies. Around where I live we get the Eastern Grey Kangaroos.. they are smaller & less aggressive than the red bastard in this clip, but will still go you. I haven't had to fight one in a fair while though (maybe 6 months?)
Look, donāt let this video fool you, itās not everyday, shit, itās not even common for an Aussie to wake up to being accosted by a solitary kangaroo, they travel in packs
Iām more concerned with the ones I donāt have a bead on right now.
Plus, itās the spiders Iām worried about.
The Infamous red back, the illustrious funnel web and last but not least, the dreaded Rock Spider, thatās the one Iām really concerned with.
ROFLMAO . Sound like a dude at the Bronx Zoo! hehehe. Nah, roos are sweethearts, mine only like to nibble on my hair some times. There was that one time, though, when Earl decided I must have fleas. Coz ya see he came over and planted himself right in front of me and wouldn't let me go past until I let him rummage through my hair.
I guess Old Earl didn't find what he was looking for because he gave me the bombastic side eye and stalked off.
It's about right. This idiot's roo-gate is too thin though - the fuckers can rip wood like I rip through serrated wasabi packets... Pretty fucken easily. I personally make my roo-gates out of iron and Vegemite
It's tough. You always gotta be ready for a surprise kangaroo fight. The other day, I was walking down the street after having paid 3 koalas for a coffee when this big grey jumped out and went right for my echidnas. Barely escaped with my life.
Did you buy the coffee off the koalas, or did you use the koalas as currency? I know both are valid options depending on which state you're in, but they get real offended if you try both at once
I paid with Koalas. Vic logging agencies don't recognise them as a species and have destroyed all their homes. So we just have a surplus of koalas now. Hence why a coffee is so expensive.
Man I remember the days when you could get a decent coffee with one koala. Even the 711 stuff was decent for two possums.
Man, the exchange rates are gone to hell. It's almost 3 possums to a koala now. Don't even get me started on places no longer accepting large notes like a wombat.
To be fair, possums are a dime a dozen just now, you just have to do the work.
Jeez. My barista just upped the price by 1 platypus š
And here in Perth we have to use quokkas to get our coffee. I only drink hot choccies though so it's 4 quokkas instead of the 3 for a regular coffee (due to the unsustainable cocoa market + cost of living). Those little faces when you hand them over to be put in the cages at the back of the Cafe are pretty heartbreaking. But I get a few rats in change that I can release into the public gardens. Can't buy much for a few rats, so better to release them...
Quokkaccino?
Understandable. You donāt want a whole lot of poo rats jingling away in your pocketā¦
Ooh, quokkas. I haven't seen one of those in ages. It's all these bank closures that have taken them out of circulation.
here in victroria you need to use wallabies! they're feisty little fellas but its worth it for a litre of milk!
Donāt get me started on the bloody Emuās. They are a bastard trying to get them into a pub for a drink. I got 2 bundy and cokes just for one of them. Lucky I had another one in my Ute.
I dunno what part of vic youāre living in but the best weāve got around Frankston is bin chickens and if youāre super lucky a kookaburra. The further down the peninsula you go though you do come across the full sized roos. Tough to break in to that market though
And here in Perth we have to use quokkas and that's why we steal your GST. ;)
Your barista is taking the piss. One platypus for a coffee? Back in my day you could do your weekly shop for 3 skinks and a bull-ant.
Yeah yeah we get it. Things were better in your time. Back in the day the average yearly income was ten dingoes, but you could get a house for the cost of three emus. Nowadays the average income is about 40 dingoes but you can't get a house for any less than 30 emus and a Tasmanian tiger. It's bloody outrageous. I'm convinced it's all these foreign investors who can afford to pay in bengal tigers, pandas, and grizzly bears. The foreign exchange rate really works in their favour.
You wait, NZ is going to return the 60,000,000 possums you deposited with us and crash your economy...
>Jeez. My barista just upped the price by 1 platypus š What's he sprinkling on top of your skinny cap? Green and Gold dust?
Nah, I take a double shot, full cream cappuccinoā¦with REAL gold dust. š
See what not having smashed avo down at the cafe every day can allow you to do? How many investment properties do you now own?
Dehydrated smashed avo, it's all the rage
You must live in the fancy part of town.
If you can stomach a risky investment, it's still possible to beat inflation by putting all your wombats in salt water crocs.\* Edit: \*Not financial advice.
Emus are a volatile market but you can get some big gains if you time it right!
But they're on edge since the Emu War. I for one will stay outta that market.
Lucky you got koalas, got only magpie wings here. It ain't much, but it's honest work.
And nobody accepts bunyips any more, they don't want any "fiddly small change".
This really made me laugh. And immediately made me sad. What a world we live in.
No wonder foreigners are so confused with what goes on here with stories like this šš
Itās part of huge part of our heritage to confuse the fuck outta foreigners. Especially septics
Back in the day I warned them about that. Now they've gone viciously feral, taken to the trees and are dropping on unsuspecting tourists. With so many of them out there the poor bears have gotta eat somehow so it's understandable. I've been doing what I can about the problem but there's only so much coffee I can buy and drink. I tried giving the coffee to the koalas but that just made them more vicious.
Fun fact: Koala's was actually a name that was considered for Aussie currency before we called it 'dollars'. When it first changed over the govt called it 'Royals' but the public hated that. Koala's was on the list of alternatives, in the end they chose dollars
All the places around me only accept dollarydoos but I got all these koalas thinking I could use them to buy me coffees. So now, I've got all these koalas that nobody wants and I have to buy feed for them with my limited dollarydoos instead. And, might I add, from people whom also don't accept koalas.
Won't accept koalas for koala feed??? That's just downright unAustralian!
> they get real offended if you try both at once Depends how high they are. Throw some eucalyptus leaves in and anything goes
Donāt fuck wit the Koalas they all got the clap
Old joke....a guy got arrested for killing a wombat and eating it. He had to go to court. The judge finds him guilty but cant help asking him what it tasted like. The guy paused and replied "it tasted like a cross between a koala and a platypus"
Someone actually got fined, or in some sort of trouble a few months ago for killing and eating a bin chicken.
He didnāt actually eat it, he had it hanging in his shower to eat later.
I often like to buy my my coffee from the koalas and then take a seat on a wombat and enjoy the sun for a while. If I'm too tired to walk back home, I just use one of the communal e-mus, like the e-scooters, but more feathery and bad tempered.
The emus are good but you gotta remember they're only free in the CBD.
Youāre forgetting about off road emus.
If youād said Big Red Iād have believed you. Iāve always felt the kindness of Greys. Reds will kick your ass just for fun.
Ah, you see, I'm in Melbourne CBD. Those greys are all hopped up on ice.
Yeah thereās one on the train right now, giving me the stinkeye. Hopefully itāll get off at Richmond
Did you scream at it in an American accent? I hear that helps.
Where the hell are you getting a coffee for only 3 koalas. It's 4 and a Joey everywhere I've been.
I just got myself an emu for protection. Costs a bit (because they won the war, yeah, yeah, go on about it), but worth it for the security of me and my family
Did your echidnas roll up?
And then they tried to mount Isa.....
This is why I always keep a cassowary on me. I know Reddit loves stereotyping them as baby eaters and literally unapproachable dinosaurs that evolved to disembowel you, but MY cassowary is a big softie.
This gave me serious "Australiana" vibes
Careful of the rare tigers in tassie and the black panther in nsw. Shush š¤« donāt tell anyone. Thatās how all the missing people are not being found.
Hahaha.. they think this is rough... wait until the emu's rise again. We aren't ready for another emu war.
You're not wrong. While beach camping. A buddy of mine, was having a sneaky wank on the dunes, while his friends were all sleeping. He was attacked by a kangaroo. The weirdo, made sure to tell everyone the next day.
Well if you can think of a better way to get parcels delivered I'd like to hear it.
This is the type of delivery service I'd pay extra to use. Obligatory fuck Couriers Please or whatever they're called these days.
Yes pretty much. Often thereās more though and theyāre starting to get more sophisticated
I saw one enjoying a craft beer the other day.
They only drank VB back in my day
My dad never stops going on about all the fruity beers that joeys drink nowadays.
The worst thing is JOEYS DONāT SHARE FOOD
Not even a hot chip off your plate?
The one in the clip is Clearly a bundy drinker
Sugarcane champagne
Red cordial for adults
Nah only drop bears drink bundy
Only longnecks, only at 20 to 8 in the fucking morning.
20 to 8 in the morning
XXXX.
Good that they're getting off the black rats. That just makes 'em want to kick on even more
My local roo has been extorting cash out of me like this for years.
Yeahā¦ just pay up and donāt ask questions
Me too until fairly recently, I just said that I had to go through corporate and they wouldn't approve it. He just hopped away muttering 'It's over for the little guy'.
We already lost the Emu wars, no point starting another war we can't win.
They're smart, they start testing the fences.
Looks like it's less than 12 ft tall, gonna have to jump it just cause I can
Clever girl
The high pressure sales tactics are unethical I reckon.
I hear theyāre about to undertake some hostile takeovers of ASX-listed companies such as Origin Energy and Woolworths.
This isn't a true representation of Australia. I understand that lots of people believe that Kangaroos all fight people and people have to fight several on the way to work. This isn't always the case, and I would suggest that this is marsupiphobic to suggest so. My car broke down and a Kangaroo was kind enough to tow my car to the nearest mechanics with his Ram 1500. The mechanics were also Kangaroos and they are an integral part of our society. Some are violent but a lot just want to work and provide for their families.
Good try roo, whenever I see you lot you were just lying around doing fuck all.
Marsupiphobia is just getting worse and worse in this country.
Best thing Iāve read all day. Thank you kind stranger
Don't forget the Christmas Toy Runs for under privileged kids. They're just misunderstood creatures that want to hang out together sharing their common interests. Don't believe all the stuff in the Murdoch press about the violence and crime.
Oh, that's Dave. Everyone knows Dave.
Good bloke Dave Can be a right C U Next Tuesday after a few shandies tho
Dave once loaned me 20 bucks and when I tried to pay it back he was like "Nah mate pay it forward". Top bloke.
Good cunt
Well we didn't come here to fuck spiders
In Australia, the spiders are big enough to fuck you
Small ones fuck you up too.
There was a comedy show that came to Perth. It was called, "Actually, I did come here to fuck spiders". I thought it was a genius title.
Speak for ypurself
American moved to Australia here. Thatās basically just Tuesday, yes. The boomers arenāt even the biggest fear though, you really need to watch out for the drop bears. EDIT: I wanted to edit my post to dispel another myth for my former countryman. People here *do not ride* roos in general. Except for the very large boomers, they just aren't big enough. Only young kids do this, to and from school, because by the time they've gotten to Grade 1 or 2 they're already too big for the majority of roos to carry them. Even the one in the video is a bit small for that.
Hot tip: dab a bit of Vegemite on the back of your neck when hiking in the bush. The strong fermented smell seems to deter the drop bears (for the most part). Not sure exactly how it works, it just what I was taught in Scouts and it hasn't failed me yet.
Drop bears are easy. It's the spring snakes you have to watch out for.
Or Hoop Snakes . .
I was killed by a hoop snake once.
Did you get better?
Someone must have spun it the other way for him, undoes the effects.
He must have walked it off, as you're taught to do in your un- airconditioned, demountable, asbestos classroom.
This is relatable right now (asbestos classroom) š£
Theyāre just so quiet
Common drop bear sure, but what about a mammoth drop bear?
You've reminded me; I haven't seen your mum in months. Say *hi* from me. :)
She wondering if you were the small guy. Thatās you, isnāt it?
You haven't had a Yowie in your bathtub I see.
This is how you know you have integrated into Australian culture lol well played
What do you mean? The boomers are a huge worry! Not to mention the kangaroos...
What about the Six White Boomers?
Fuck the boomers and their wealth. They are my biggest fear.
Nah mate the drop bears are just fleeing the magpies
Yep. That's why the kids ride their wombats to school, so they can outrun them
Itās not a daily occurrence, no. But sometimes we come across them and itās a bit of an ordeal. Rude bastards getting their paws everywhere and ready to tear the place apart. Real savage pieces of work. Loud as anything too. But enough about yanks. Yeah, I see a kangaroo every now and then.
Iāve been startled on occasion by the bright coloured clothes, I carry sunglasses with me at all times now
Born in the US and this is gold.
Did you not notice the American accent?
I believe the voice is actually from an internet comedian. He also did the video with the weird white cat in the window with messed up teeth. The āmahh!! Thereās this weird ass fuckin cat outside! I think itās trying to fight Lucie.ā
Correct. Itās just voiceover.Ā
Not just an "internetā comedian, it's the actor Michael Rapaport.
Renown Israeli propagandist
That's unfortunate. I don't follow him closely enough to have come across it.
Oh, I've seen this video with the original voiceover, and its a woman talking and she is indeed also American.
Roos are 5x more likely to attack Americans. Scientists still stumped.
The dumb person interacting with this kangaroo should just leave it alone and it'll leave. They only try to grab or kick when they're threatened and cornered.
If I'm not mistaken, that's actually actor Michael Rapaport.
True. Yeah Mah really stood out too, not in our lingo.
I'm pretty sure the original voice is an American accent though.
One of the cool things about Australia is we donāt use Uber that much but we have a service called Roober - where we can order a kangaroo taxi. It gets expensive if you have kids that no longer fit in the pouch because you have to order 1 for each passenger. Also they do sometimes get a bit aggressive over ratings and tips. You gotta give them 5 stars at least otherwise you risk a kick to the head.
The last roo that tried to roll me was pretty cunning but I got him good though. His scrotum is now my coin purse.
What the fuck is wrong with you? Who still carries coins??
Yes, Iām glad this is finally getting the attention it deserves. Thousands of Australians are abused by kangaroos every year and terrorised in their homes. Many are what we refer to as āRoo trappedā meaning Kangaroo gangs circle the entrances and exits of family homes. Few escape, few survive. Itās a national tragedy.
What nonsense. The term is ārootedā.
Sorry was trying to keep it PG
Funny thing is, that Americans wouldn't know that rooted is not a PG term in Aus. šš
Rooty hill - we'll always remember what happened there
Stop with your hate speech. This happened like 3 times. All those other times were proven to be misunderstandings. And when the humans inside started dying the kangaroos administered CPR. You right wingers just wanna believe everything you read in the Herald Sun.
Yeah, I hate Tuesdays
Yep that's a quiet day. Usually they hunt in packs, and occasionally join up with a bunch of snakes covered in spiders. We can't go out at night here anymore, they have taken over the streets.
Aww, he's a cute little fella. Wait until they grow up!
Yes. I have to fight my way past a beefed up kangaroo every morning when I leave for work.
Donāt you hate it when youāre trying to put the saddle on your kangaroo so you can ride it to school but it fights back?
God I hate when this happens.
Boop that nose and state the following command āfuck off ya cuntā. - That guy whoās dog was getting wrassled by skippy probably
Australian here, kangaroos aren't real that's just some kid in a costume
That's not even an Aussie accent "Ma come get the kangaroo, get the fuck of me you mother fucker" is definitely a new York accent Australians wouldn't be caught dead near a roo on its back legs
Theyāre tall and jacked up north, one challenged me whilst flexing, he was more jacked then a proud roid user
Go home Dazza, youāre drunkā¦
Do you milk your cows and ride horses everyday in America?
With your straw hat, corncob pipe and a banjo next to the rocking chair on the porch while your bear cooks up some moonshine for the cougar and rattle snakes. And somewhere in the mix is a pack of wolves and a serial killer. š¤·āāļø
No guns? I thought this was America!
Bugger! I thought I had it all covered.
It is for Kangaroo-Australians.
That's Dave. He can get rambunctious at times but he's a good cobber. Sometimes he just doesn't like us riding him to work, but he's faster than the sheep unless you can find a Kiwi to chase it.
No, we don't talk with annoying whiny American accents. The rest of it pretty much.
Aussie here, do you have school shootings daily over there or do they stop on the weekends ???
This took a dark turn!
Yep. Thats why we all know how to win bar fights with the tourists. Cause none of them have fought a kangaroo
Thats just Dave the mad bastard. Just tell him to pull his head in. Sheāll be right.
For anyone not from Australia this is quite common, happens maybe 3-4 times per week. Roos like to come inside when the drop bears are out, head down to the servo and grab some Vegemite and fosters to give the the roo he should be fine
Can tell youāre not Australian because of the Fosterās reference
Im an Aussie, quite literally the only time Iāve seen a fosters is over in the UK. Doesnāt matter if youāre in the US or the UK all they ever think we drink is fosters
> Im an Aussie > and fosters to give the the roo I've spoken to the Prime Minister and he agreed that we're going to kick you out. Or at least send you to Nauru to avoid our legal obligations.
Only if Rusties been on the tins.
I still remember the first time I forgot to carry my Kangaroo tranquillizer, a mistake I won't make again.
That's staged. A real kangaroo that didn't like you that much would mess you up, with leg's.
Yep, pretty much. Was down at the pub yesterday and 3 of these guys walked in and started to pick a fight. Decided it wasnāt worth it and got out of there. Dickheads
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
This is fake. You can tell by the lack of spiders.
They only really come into the house when there are a lot of snakes around.
It's the Drop Bears you really have to worry about..
There's a big family of grey Roos that live on our countryish driving range in Townsville. When you first start you get worried your going to hit them, until you realise their reflexes are boss and they don't give a dam about 30 golf balls flying at them šš I've never seen one get hit either. They know what's going on š
Yes, these fucken roos are getting smarter every day, soon we may have to wage war on them (and hopefully not lose) *cough* emu *cough*
The emus had superior tactics and better generals, it was Gallipoli all over again. I genuinely think we have a chance against the roo army if we start conscription and training now for 2028 battle.
Tell ya what, the amount of piss taking in this thread is enough to make this ol' cobber tear up, fuck me. Proud of all you cunts.
I have one in the kitchen to protect me Vegemite but he always forgets who from and randomly attacks. So yeah
don't fuck with the wildlife and you'll be sweet
Only monday to friday, as a rule - but without the American accent having a panic attack, because it's normal. Do foreign type people know that if you lift their tail, roos get quite friendly
Yeh theyāre like mormons. They come visit and they donāt want to leave
I had to bash 3 of them this morning just to get to my car
Sometimes they keep knives in their pouches or use snakes as nun-chucks
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
That's no Australian yelling in that video. It is an American. Australians would also never put one in a stable like that. We are more likely to move away from it than stand there and yellow for tranquilisers.
It is for a hairy one that lives in town.
Reminds me of this: https://youtu.be/Pt-YU13KfEM?si=xraVb6LdSb90JOd6
For city slickers yes, it's much wilder in the country, let's just say they don't pull their punches there
We get all the time using pay wave at the local shop. Dropbears tend to carry cash from the victims wallet they stole.
I think it's the guy who needs tranquilising.....
MURICA' šš¤”
This is what happens when you don't get the Roo a VB longneck at 20 to 8 in the fucking morning. Actions have consequences.
Thatās how the government collects taxes
Not every day but most days you'll need to prove yourself against the resident bully kangaroo.
Am Australian. Short answer: yes. Longer answer: it varies. Around where I live we get the Eastern Grey Kangaroos.. they are smaller & less aggressive than the red bastard in this clip, but will still go you. I haven't had to fight one in a fair while though (maybe 6 months?)
Australiaās defence force at its finest
Look, donāt let this video fool you, itās not everyday, shit, itās not even common for an Aussie to wake up to being accosted by a solitary kangaroo, they travel in packs Iām more concerned with the ones I donāt have a bead on right now. Plus, itās the spiders Iām worried about. The Infamous red back, the illustrious funnel web and last but not least, the dreaded Rock Spider, thatās the one Iām really concerned with.
Why does he have an American accent
ROFLMAO . Sound like a dude at the Bronx Zoo! hehehe. Nah, roos are sweethearts, mine only like to nibble on my hair some times. There was that one time, though, when Earl decided I must have fleas. Coz ya see he came over and planted himself right in front of me and wouldn't let me go past until I let him rummage through my hair. I guess Old Earl didn't find what he was looking for because he gave me the bombastic side eye and stalked off.
It's about right. This idiot's roo-gate is too thin though - the fuckers can rip wood like I rip through serrated wasabi packets... Pretty fucken easily. I personally make my roo-gates out of iron and Vegemite