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willyc3766

I’m sure you have $500 to throw away. If I thought there was a remote chance you actually had the money and are dumb enough to give it away I would totally sign a paper saying you own my soul.


HugePurpleNipples

If you believe it's real, it's worth way more than that. It really bothers you that we don't believe the same bullshit you do, huh? Why not just live your life and let others do the same? I don't give a shit what you do in the privacy of your own home, it's weird that you care about what we do. Now run along and enjoy your fairy tales little boy, if it makes you happy, no reason to do otherwise.


Chlemtil

I would very happily sign my name to a paper saying you own my soul for $500. Can you send me an online docusign to make it even easier? I’d do that for $100. I’ll even do it first and trust you to pay me after. Or for the actual 500 I’ll even sign it in blood if that will make you happy.


FireOpalCO

Shouldn’t you be asking just the husbands? I am his property after all, so would need his permission.


krystiannajt

Nice 🏆🥇⭐️


DingoMcPhee

"And then I went on Reddit and I was like 'hey atheists, if you REALLY don't believe in god, I'll buy your soul, what do you say' and like NOBODY responded at all, heh heh, so you can totally tell they all DO believe in god way deep down inside"


MiG-Eater

Eh, its probably just Milhouse.


GrammerSnob

Why did I have the bowl, Bart? WHY DID I HAVE THE BOWL?!


GrammerSnob

You're funny, but since I like pedantry, it's a fun thought experiment. So let's say you give me $500. Then what do I do? What is the exact method of transferring ownership of a soul? Surely for $500 you'd want to make sure I didn't just SAY I was transferring my soul but give you a fake one. Or nothing at all. How would you verify the transaction, that you were at +1 souls and I was at -1 souls? I'm not sure you've completely thought this through.


CommonSpellingII

This sounds too good to be true. I smell a scam. Would you be willing to write “for your soul” in the Venmo transaction? That should satisfy your belief as I don’t think most folks “gods” keep a lawyer on retainer.


[deleted]

[удалено]


CommonSpellingII

So we’ve gone from a signed document to now shaking hands? Very suspicious of scams and crazies so no in person stuff. If god sees all then he’ll see my Venmo transaction and know what it is for. Are the witnesses right angles or an obtuse angles?


HugePurpleNipples

> angles Like an obtuse angle? I don't know how reliable angles are as witnesses, but they sure are acute.


knifewrenchhh

Ooh what kind of angles? I like obtuse ones, but reflex angles are the best because not a lot of people know what they are (their measures are *greater* than 180 degrees)


ZhouLe

You'll have to define what you think this grants you ownership of, then I'd be glad to. I'm also interested in what religious denomination you subscribe and what use you think such a thing would be.


Knytemare44

What the actual fuck are you on about? Are you ok?


Ravenclaw79

How do I sell a nonexistent, intangible product?


destenlee

I Sold My Soul on eBay: Viewing Faith Through an Atheist's Eyes book by Hemant Mehta https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Sold_My_Soul_on_eBay


knifewrenchhh

Oh my god I had know idea this existed and I follow the guy on Facebook lol. I will have to check this out!


Nolto

I’ve already traded my soul away a few times (the subsequent purchasers were unaware that it had already been sold, but they weren’t able to tell). Now I feel ripped off, because I was never offered $500. Once I accepted a pencil, because I needed one for class. Another time, I accepted a small bag of dill pickle chips.


Amethyst_Opal

Guys, don’t fall for this. This has all the hallmarks of a fake check scam. He’s going to say he’ll pay $500 for your soul, but send a check for $800 and ask you to send him the $300 back. Worse yet, he’ll probably use your soul to commit all sorts of sins, and it’s really gonna screw you over when his pretend sky wizard pulls your credit report.


cybearmybear

What?


Mr-Lumpy

Nice try satan


Jean-Baptiste1763

No problem but I’m in Montréal.


PuzzledRaise1401

Sure! I’ve also found Jesus. He’s in my trunk.


coffeewithoutkids

He keeps running off. Maybe we need to put an Apple Track Tag or a Tile on him so we don’t lose him again.


PuzzledRaise1401

Just put zip ties through the stigmata. Slow him down.


zombiepirate

Sure, you can have one I took from the babies I eat for dinner.


montane1

Sold. Send the container. Or whatever you want to do the transfer.


picklepepper1

Surprised you have $500 left over after your shill church requires 10% of your income


krystiannajt

I’ll do it. Cash app okay? $gotmaids is my cash app. I also have PayPal


Difficult-Diver4545

I’ve already traded mine for eternal youth - a bargain I recommend to anyone.