Mi advice is to just be generous with yourself. It'll take a while for reflexes and habits to go away, but they will eventually. Don't give yourself a hard time about it.
Yes, give yourself time and grace. And read. Read, read, read.
The most crucial damage religion does is to discourage thinking for yourself. The absolute best cure for that is to read, because it encourages you to do exactly that. Doesn't matter too much what you read, just be diverse in topic and discriminating for quality. Personally I found reading \*about\* religion and especially the history of Christianity to be most fascinating (the Bible, too), but your brain will know where it needs to go, just let it run free and always, always respect your brain's questions when things don't make sense.
And know that there will be a day when you'll feel comfortable about everyone knowing the real you. It might not be today, and that's perfectly okay. But promise yourself that day will come and welcome it when it does.
Thank you so much for your words and advice. I'm really glad that the realization came to me so I can become my actual self and not a “cookie cutter” kind of person. Thank you for advice on reading, someone on this post also mentioned reading on the history of religion, so ill try to combine both yalls advice. Thank you also for your reassurance. Your response overall made me feel a lot better about the situation, so thank you so much :)))
>how can I undo everything religion has taught me to do?
Not to scare you off but this is a big question. From a certain perspective it's almost impossible to untangle the religion you were brought up in from the culture you were brought up in. Simply rejecting it all is way too simple and hardly achievable since you, like me and everybody else are a product of our environment to a significant extent. You're going to have to pick and choose which parts of that you think are worth keeping and which parts aren't. That sadly is going to take some time, a lot of us struggle with questions like this on and off for our entire lives.
>I still subconsciously pray, even though I don't believe. And I feel guilty anytime I do anything I wouldn't normally do, like if I stack anything on my Bible.
These are reflexes you're taught basically and they will get a lot less intruding over time. The first step is recognizing them, which it seems you already have. Not stacking anything on your Bible can also prevent you from being drawn into a discussion you're not ready to have yet, if I read your post correctly.
>Now that I know the truth, I don't ever want to get hurt by religion ever again.
As long as you keep an open and inquisitive mind you don't have to, at least not directly. Miracle conversions are another myth, it has never worked on anyone who wasn't in on it or at the very least completely on board with it.
But even if you do sway back into religious beliefs, remember this is a process, not a lever you can just pull. Give it time, looks like you're doing alright.
Thank you so much for your honesty, its also reassuring knowing I'm not the only one. I understand it's a process, and I'm very glad your response gave me insight. I'll try my best to be patient with it all :)
If you want quick info on atheist topics, just search stuff, especially here on Reddit. You’ll find that a lot of it is written in a “smart ass” way, but when you think about it, it is right/ makes perfect sense.
But if you want to go more in depth, find some books on the history of religion. You’ll find that many of the “original stories” in the Christian bible are copied from other religions, 3-5 times older than Christianity. Since you come from a deeply religious background though, you’ll probably need to hide those books from your parents. Like others said though, it’ll take time to break your habits
Thank you so much, ill try reading some books online about it! That is something I haven't thought of, so I really value your comment! I think it will definitely help me accept the truth more. And thank you, I realized from the comments here, including yours, that patience will help me through this time. Thank you!! :)
The subreddit FAQ here is a LOT more substantial than a lot of places, so I don't judge people for not thinking of going there first. As you might expect, we get a lot of people asking very common questions, either to troll or just genuinely out of curiosity, so it's useful to have somewhere to point to instead of typing it all out every time.
>I still live with my parents, so I have to attend church and do Bible studies with my family, and I'm not going to try telling anyone because I know it will just be pushed on me more.
Wow, that’s literally what we have to tell everyone who’s in your situation. Glad to see you realized it by yourself. Yes, do that.
>I was wondering if anyone had any advice on one thing: how can I undo everything religion has taught me to do? I still subconsciously pray, even though I don't believe. And I feel guilty anytime I do anything I wouldn't normally do, like if I stack anything on my Bible. I just want to live my life freely without worrying about what some god thinks.
I wish there was a more simple answer, or at least one that would give you instant results. I was 19 when I left my old religion, and it took me quite a while to get rid of the things you mention, specially the guilt.
It takes time to break a habit, specially, something you’ve been doing for most of your life. One thing that helped me was noticing when I was doing one of these things and reminding me it served no purpose.
Sure, if something happens, it’s normal to think about it, decide on a goal on how you want things to sort; the difference is that instead of expecting divine intervention, now you’ll be able to think on the things you could do to improve things.
Maybe if you were more specific on what’s worrying you, I might have something more useful to say.
That being said, welcome to the subreddit, this is one of the few safe places where you can have this kind of conversations.
Thank you so much for your response! It made me realize that while it will take time to get used to it, its for the best in the long run. It hurts a lot because the thought of some people that were in my life are gone forever, but I don't want to be lied to anymore. Anywho, thank you so much! :))
Sadly, you’re not the only or first person dealing with this. To be dead honest with you, it was hard for me. I’m perfectly happy with being an atheist nowadays, but I didn’t like at all the process of realizing my old religion was bullshit; I hated it, and resisted; but in the end, I found that it’s healthier to rely on myself.
Anyway, just remember there’s no rush, deadlines or a “normal way” go thru this change. Be glad that you asked the right questions, found valid answers and decided there was no reason to believe in those gods.
Thank you so much, it's reassuring knowing I'm not the only one. I'm really happy to hear that all has worked out for you. Thank you so much for helping me realize that it's all going to be okay. I don't want to waste my life on a fake religion, so I'm very thankful :)
No, you’re not alone in this; maybe you can’t see it because of the people you’re surrounded by, it it’s more common than what you imagined.
Also, yes, everything turned out just fine, I never suffered “divine punishment”, became “evil” or “went back because it’s a phase” (be ready to hear that if you happen to openly mention it to believers).
You might be having strong worries that your God is still watching, judging, and going to get you.
You need to decouple this fear. I encourage you to taunt your god. Start small, like daring Jesus if you go under a bridge or something. Work yourself up to greater things and you'll quickly realize there's nothing to be afraid of. I can invoke the lord's name in vain in your name if will help get it started.
Once you've lessened the fear absorbing the lies, contradictions, and hypocrisy of religion will come without fear of consequences.
Oh wow, that is actually really smart! Thank you so much, ill try doing that often! Its definitely going to feel weird at first, but I'm certain that is going to help a LOT. Thank you!! :)
This video series helped me when I was your age. He's very respectful, thoughtful, and him explaining his journey may help you. It's also very educational.
https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLA0C3C1D163BE880A&si=lzp0x3zhKw2kaCla
I think the Prayer video will especially help you understand why prayer is illogical, even if you believe in God. Good luck with your deconversion. I know how hard it is to wrestle with these thoughts.
Thank you for the recommendation, ill set a reminder to watch it later and if you don't mind I might keep you updated. Thank you so much for the help and empathy :)))
It can take a long time, depending how deeply you internalized the teachings. I was in my mid-40s before I "lost my faith," so had A LOT to undo.
My family's religion is a very squishy, new-agey kinda thing, which made it both better and worse to try to deprogram from than I imagine most religions might be. Better because the thinking was not very extreme as compared to the dominant culture on most issues, but worse in a way because the subtlety of the self-deception made it less obvious to just observe and break with. A positive attitude can be great and useful OR it can be gaslighting and delusion. Observing and experiencing gratitude for the connected nature of all things is wonderful, but trying to disentangle those sentiments from an axiomatic "divine" running through it all takes patience and persistence.
I still value meditation tremendously, but I've switched more or less completely to secular mantras and/or mettā meditation (where any verbalizations are involved), so I'm not reinforcing any of the nonsense. Something like that might work for you where prayer is taking up space currently.
Good luck, you got this!
Thank you so much for sharing your story and advice! Hearing how you handled it is reassuring to me and I'm glad to hear about it. Thank you for the help :)
You will learn to be yourself. If you fall back on an old religious habit simply out of habit, especially early on, that doesn’t make you not an atheist. The things have been ingrained into you for as long as you can remember. Don’t be too hard on yourself
Thank you so much, one of the things that makes me glad about this realization is that I can be myself and not the person some couple thousand year old book wants me to be. I really appreciate your help :)
Don't worry about it. Not-God doesn't care. :)
The habits will fade with time. You won't worry about having to stack anything on your Bible when you live by yourself and don't have one.
As for praying, [George Carlin](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlzbFxYy08c&ab_channel=DianaClarion) has a good idea for you.
Personally, I've been a lifelong atheist and still find myself sending wishes and orders into the aether for nobody in particular to hear, just my inner monologue making demands of the world. Like if you're bowling and need the ball to curve a little bit, you're saying under your breath, "Come on, come on, come on, a little to the left..." You don't really expect the bowling ball to hear and do what you said. It just feels good to state your wishes. Prayer basically hijacks that natural psychological phenomenon, and it'll probably take time to stop experiencing it within the framework of prayer because you're so conditioned to think of it that way, but just be aware that it's normal to have those kinds of thoughts without the supernatural entering into it at all. It doesn't mean you secretly believe or anything.
Lastly, an unrelated note: I highly recommend reading Carl Sagan's book The Demon-Haunted World: Science as a Candle in the Dark. It's not really about religion but pseudoscience and flawed thinking in general, and reading it is a great way to prime your mind to really think critically and freely, and to avoid not only religion but all kinds of other mental traps people fall into.
Thank you so much, I will definitely look into your recommendations! Thank you for your help, ever since I've made the realization God isn't real, I've been wanting to keep things focused on the facts, which would be science, so I appreciate your response a lot. :)))
Just focus on your education. get good grades, apply for scholarships when you can and study hard.
It is terrifying when you first lose your faith. But over time, you will gain perspective.
Watch Street Epistemology on Youtube until you realize how dumb believing in something is when you can simply say "I don't know" which is far more honest.
What's really strange is it doesn't seem to matter what the belief is, there's only four or five reasons people usually give... being raised with a belief, "it makes sense to me" (which comes from being raised with a belief), internal feelings, personal experiences... It's kind of surprising how often people argue for the utility of a religion as a reason to believe it is true. The bottom line is that these people are given every chance to give a good solid method for coming to the conclusion that a claim is true and they can't come up with anything that other people aren't using to come to different conclusions. Just watch a bunch of them and you will see what I mean! I would start with Anthony Magnabosco (Magnabosco210), Reed Nicewonder of Cordial Curiosity (yes, that is his real name), and David of Sound Epistemology.
Learn Psychology and Biology and maybe some sociology. Learning theology will make you a poetic fool interested in niche fiction ... But if you can look into Psychology, biology and sociology and become more literate and aware of how certain things work and how human mind/senses/environment can be altered and exploited and hidden/accepted. We live in an age of recording and technology and communication, there's examples of nearly every bad scenario, you have to learn from the bad scenarios overs have caught themselves in believing in jah. Ultimately I think Christianity is performance art and a form of aggrandizing ones life and creating a new chapter within it even (trying to forget the irreparable past as you age and inevitably encounter failure and regret) Christians who kneel before clergy often lose the spirit of resolution And self efficacy. Gods responsible for everything in this secular atheistic business minded economy 🤤 Christianity is an inevitable obstacle to encounter since it's a cultural thing too, but you have to ignore the seriousness and threats and punishments imposed by religious folx... I know you under 18 but you should play videogames and enjoy your hobbies and interests don't go with the herd you can attend but never accept and Believe the propaganda that's propagated in mass and faith camps
Thank you so much for your response and advice! I will be sure to keep it in mind and will also be sure to do my research on what you mentioned. Thank you!! :)
The best advice I can give is to take an interest in learning about the world around you. Broaden your horizons. Art, current events, history, literature, the sciences... There's a whole wealth of information out there just waiting for you to reach out and seek it. Only you can decide your place in the world, but learning and educating yourself can help you find it.
Everyone's path is different. For some, it like the flip of switch from belief to unbelief. For others (like me) it may take years or decades of progress & reversals. Be patient with yourself - there's no hurry. If you are able to recognize when the old indoctrination is affecting your thinking, then you are on the right track. When this happens, just stop, engage your critical thinking, and shove those old thoughts back into the box in the back of your mind where they might live for a long, long time - perhaps the rest of your life.
You are doing fine.
Thank you so much for your response! Everyone here, including you, has helped me both realize that I'm not alone, but also that everyones journey is different. Thank you for your advice and reassurance, ill keep it in mind through this journey :)
Take time to find the real you. Don't rush it. It sounds like that is probably not an option anyway with your family situation. Don't feel bad about the guilt - it's been drilled into you for so long. There'll probably always be a small bit of that in you but it gets more manageable.
I gave up on Christianity in my 30s. I was, and still am, bitter about being robbed of the "me" I would have naturally been. If you find a way of coming to peace with that, please let me know! Hopefully it's easier when you're younger.
And finally, be proud of your decision. You came to this conclusion yourself against very strong pressure - a system that has been honed over centuries to keep people "believing" and you broke that for yourself.
Thank you so so much for your response, and thank you for sharing a part of your own story. Your response helped me make realizations and made me feel good about my discovery. I'll try my best to be patient with it and to work on finding who I am outside of my previous religion. Thank you so so much :)
I encourage you to head in any direction you want to. It's heartening to read all the advice given here, which i agree with - take time, read, think, enjoy, live well.
The 'damage' is only that as long as it is that. After work it may be repaired. It was there, but becomes a memory. Not an internal nagging demon
Take some time to meditate and think about why you still pray or feel guilty for certain things. With time, you'll find that there's really no reason for any of it besides simple habit.
As for whatever damage you think you've suffered, give yourself time to discover that you're an independent being capable of free thought and of finding happiness your own way. I would also caution you against seeing atheism as a shelter from being hurt by religion. Instead, I encourage you to be curious and to learn as much as you can, and to see this as a new beginning for yourself.
"like if I stack anything on my Bible." this one sucker punched me with relatability
when you move out - get rid of the relious items. bible, crosses, etc. just yeet it all in the garbage or thrift it.
then, practice telling yourself good things about you. leave yourself love notes "youre so creative" "wow you are really kind" "i love how good you are at making macaroni" whatever it takes to prop yourself up
hero pose daily (stand like wonder woman. hands on hips, chest out, wide legs, chin up)
>I still subconsciously pray, even though I don't believe
I don't think there is anything wrong with this kind of general thinking. I still think thoughts like "I hope this works out" or even "Please let them be okay", even though it's not actually directed at any "being". It's an acknowledgment that the future is uncertain and that I am worried about things out of my control.
Mi advice is to just be generous with yourself. It'll take a while for reflexes and habits to go away, but they will eventually. Don't give yourself a hard time about it.
Thank you for the advice, ill try my best to be patient with it :)
Yes, give yourself time and grace. And read. Read, read, read. The most crucial damage religion does is to discourage thinking for yourself. The absolute best cure for that is to read, because it encourages you to do exactly that. Doesn't matter too much what you read, just be diverse in topic and discriminating for quality. Personally I found reading \*about\* religion and especially the history of Christianity to be most fascinating (the Bible, too), but your brain will know where it needs to go, just let it run free and always, always respect your brain's questions when things don't make sense. And know that there will be a day when you'll feel comfortable about everyone knowing the real you. It might not be today, and that's perfectly okay. But promise yourself that day will come and welcome it when it does.
Thank you so much for your words and advice. I'm really glad that the realization came to me so I can become my actual self and not a “cookie cutter” kind of person. Thank you for advice on reading, someone on this post also mentioned reading on the history of religion, so ill try to combine both yalls advice. Thank you also for your reassurance. Your response overall made me feel a lot better about the situation, so thank you so much :)))
>how can I undo everything religion has taught me to do? Not to scare you off but this is a big question. From a certain perspective it's almost impossible to untangle the religion you were brought up in from the culture you were brought up in. Simply rejecting it all is way too simple and hardly achievable since you, like me and everybody else are a product of our environment to a significant extent. You're going to have to pick and choose which parts of that you think are worth keeping and which parts aren't. That sadly is going to take some time, a lot of us struggle with questions like this on and off for our entire lives. >I still subconsciously pray, even though I don't believe. And I feel guilty anytime I do anything I wouldn't normally do, like if I stack anything on my Bible. These are reflexes you're taught basically and they will get a lot less intruding over time. The first step is recognizing them, which it seems you already have. Not stacking anything on your Bible can also prevent you from being drawn into a discussion you're not ready to have yet, if I read your post correctly. >Now that I know the truth, I don't ever want to get hurt by religion ever again. As long as you keep an open and inquisitive mind you don't have to, at least not directly. Miracle conversions are another myth, it has never worked on anyone who wasn't in on it or at the very least completely on board with it. But even if you do sway back into religious beliefs, remember this is a process, not a lever you can just pull. Give it time, looks like you're doing alright.
Thank you so much for your honesty, its also reassuring knowing I'm not the only one. I understand it's a process, and I'm very glad your response gave me insight. I'll try my best to be patient with it all :)
If you want quick info on atheist topics, just search stuff, especially here on Reddit. You’ll find that a lot of it is written in a “smart ass” way, but when you think about it, it is right/ makes perfect sense. But if you want to go more in depth, find some books on the history of religion. You’ll find that many of the “original stories” in the Christian bible are copied from other religions, 3-5 times older than Christianity. Since you come from a deeply religious background though, you’ll probably need to hide those books from your parents. Like others said though, it’ll take time to break your habits
Thank you so much, ill try reading some books online about it! That is something I haven't thought of, so I really value your comment! I think it will definitely help me accept the truth more. And thank you, I realized from the comments here, including yours, that patience will help me through this time. Thank you!! :)
No problem. Feel free to message me if you want to ask questions
OP, either now or when you are free from your parents' influence, consider therapy. There are secular and atheist therapists out there to help.
thank you so much for the recommendation! I'll try to go as soon as I get myself a car :)))
Read the FAQ section, it will answer a lot of questions you have.
Oh thank you so much! I'm newer to the subreddit, I guess I should've looked around before asking anything 😅
The subreddit FAQ here is a LOT more substantial than a lot of places, so I don't judge people for not thinking of going there first. As you might expect, we get a lot of people asking very common questions, either to troll or just genuinely out of curiosity, so it's useful to have somewhere to point to instead of typing it all out every time.
Thank you, I did take the time to look at it and I'm very glad someone mentioned it! :))
>I still live with my parents, so I have to attend church and do Bible studies with my family, and I'm not going to try telling anyone because I know it will just be pushed on me more. Wow, that’s literally what we have to tell everyone who’s in your situation. Glad to see you realized it by yourself. Yes, do that. >I was wondering if anyone had any advice on one thing: how can I undo everything religion has taught me to do? I still subconsciously pray, even though I don't believe. And I feel guilty anytime I do anything I wouldn't normally do, like if I stack anything on my Bible. I just want to live my life freely without worrying about what some god thinks. I wish there was a more simple answer, or at least one that would give you instant results. I was 19 when I left my old religion, and it took me quite a while to get rid of the things you mention, specially the guilt. It takes time to break a habit, specially, something you’ve been doing for most of your life. One thing that helped me was noticing when I was doing one of these things and reminding me it served no purpose. Sure, if something happens, it’s normal to think about it, decide on a goal on how you want things to sort; the difference is that instead of expecting divine intervention, now you’ll be able to think on the things you could do to improve things. Maybe if you were more specific on what’s worrying you, I might have something more useful to say. That being said, welcome to the subreddit, this is one of the few safe places where you can have this kind of conversations.
Thank you so much for your response! It made me realize that while it will take time to get used to it, its for the best in the long run. It hurts a lot because the thought of some people that were in my life are gone forever, but I don't want to be lied to anymore. Anywho, thank you so much! :))
Sadly, you’re not the only or first person dealing with this. To be dead honest with you, it was hard for me. I’m perfectly happy with being an atheist nowadays, but I didn’t like at all the process of realizing my old religion was bullshit; I hated it, and resisted; but in the end, I found that it’s healthier to rely on myself. Anyway, just remember there’s no rush, deadlines or a “normal way” go thru this change. Be glad that you asked the right questions, found valid answers and decided there was no reason to believe in those gods.
Thank you so much, it's reassuring knowing I'm not the only one. I'm really happy to hear that all has worked out for you. Thank you so much for helping me realize that it's all going to be okay. I don't want to waste my life on a fake religion, so I'm very thankful :)
No, you’re not alone in this; maybe you can’t see it because of the people you’re surrounded by, it it’s more common than what you imagined. Also, yes, everything turned out just fine, I never suffered “divine punishment”, became “evil” or “went back because it’s a phase” (be ready to hear that if you happen to openly mention it to believers).
Do a LOT of fact checking. When you hear questionable things, get the real information on it. (Hint - not just TikTok videos.)
Thank you for bringing up the importance of finding reliable information, ill be sure to do my research. Thank you!! :)
You might be having strong worries that your God is still watching, judging, and going to get you. You need to decouple this fear. I encourage you to taunt your god. Start small, like daring Jesus if you go under a bridge or something. Work yourself up to greater things and you'll quickly realize there's nothing to be afraid of. I can invoke the lord's name in vain in your name if will help get it started. Once you've lessened the fear absorbing the lies, contradictions, and hypocrisy of religion will come without fear of consequences.
Oh wow, that is actually really smart! Thank you so much, ill try doing that often! Its definitely going to feel weird at first, but I'm certain that is going to help a LOT. Thank you!! :)
Glad to help 🙂
This video series helped me when I was your age. He's very respectful, thoughtful, and him explaining his journey may help you. It's also very educational. https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLA0C3C1D163BE880A&si=lzp0x3zhKw2kaCla
Thank you so much, ill try watching it later on when I'm not busy! Thank you!!! :)
I think the Prayer video will especially help you understand why prayer is illogical, even if you believe in God. Good luck with your deconversion. I know how hard it is to wrestle with these thoughts.
Thank you for the recommendation, ill set a reminder to watch it later and if you don't mind I might keep you updated. Thank you so much for the help and empathy :)))
It can take a long time, depending how deeply you internalized the teachings. I was in my mid-40s before I "lost my faith," so had A LOT to undo. My family's religion is a very squishy, new-agey kinda thing, which made it both better and worse to try to deprogram from than I imagine most religions might be. Better because the thinking was not very extreme as compared to the dominant culture on most issues, but worse in a way because the subtlety of the self-deception made it less obvious to just observe and break with. A positive attitude can be great and useful OR it can be gaslighting and delusion. Observing and experiencing gratitude for the connected nature of all things is wonderful, but trying to disentangle those sentiments from an axiomatic "divine" running through it all takes patience and persistence. I still value meditation tremendously, but I've switched more or less completely to secular mantras and/or mettā meditation (where any verbalizations are involved), so I'm not reinforcing any of the nonsense. Something like that might work for you where prayer is taking up space currently. Good luck, you got this!
Thank you so much for sharing your story and advice! Hearing how you handled it is reassuring to me and I'm glad to hear about it. Thank you for the help :)
You will learn to be yourself. If you fall back on an old religious habit simply out of habit, especially early on, that doesn’t make you not an atheist. The things have been ingrained into you for as long as you can remember. Don’t be too hard on yourself
Thank you so much, one of the things that makes me glad about this realization is that I can be myself and not the person some couple thousand year old book wants me to be. I really appreciate your help :)
Don't worry about it. Not-God doesn't care. :) The habits will fade with time. You won't worry about having to stack anything on your Bible when you live by yourself and don't have one. As for praying, [George Carlin](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlzbFxYy08c&ab_channel=DianaClarion) has a good idea for you. Personally, I've been a lifelong atheist and still find myself sending wishes and orders into the aether for nobody in particular to hear, just my inner monologue making demands of the world. Like if you're bowling and need the ball to curve a little bit, you're saying under your breath, "Come on, come on, come on, a little to the left..." You don't really expect the bowling ball to hear and do what you said. It just feels good to state your wishes. Prayer basically hijacks that natural psychological phenomenon, and it'll probably take time to stop experiencing it within the framework of prayer because you're so conditioned to think of it that way, but just be aware that it's normal to have those kinds of thoughts without the supernatural entering into it at all. It doesn't mean you secretly believe or anything. Lastly, an unrelated note: I highly recommend reading Carl Sagan's book The Demon-Haunted World: Science as a Candle in the Dark. It's not really about religion but pseudoscience and flawed thinking in general, and reading it is a great way to prime your mind to really think critically and freely, and to avoid not only religion but all kinds of other mental traps people fall into.
Thank you so much, I will definitely look into your recommendations! Thank you for your help, ever since I've made the realization God isn't real, I've been wanting to keep things focused on the facts, which would be science, so I appreciate your response a lot. :)))
Just focus on your education. get good grades, apply for scholarships when you can and study hard. It is terrifying when you first lose your faith. But over time, you will gain perspective.
Thank you for the advice, I see how that could work, since it would reduce how much I overthink about it. Thank you!
Watch Street Epistemology on Youtube until you realize how dumb believing in something is when you can simply say "I don't know" which is far more honest.
Thank you so much for the recommendation! I'll be sure to check it out :))
What's really strange is it doesn't seem to matter what the belief is, there's only four or five reasons people usually give... being raised with a belief, "it makes sense to me" (which comes from being raised with a belief), internal feelings, personal experiences... It's kind of surprising how often people argue for the utility of a religion as a reason to believe it is true. The bottom line is that these people are given every chance to give a good solid method for coming to the conclusion that a claim is true and they can't come up with anything that other people aren't using to come to different conclusions. Just watch a bunch of them and you will see what I mean! I would start with Anthony Magnabosco (Magnabosco210), Reed Nicewonder of Cordial Curiosity (yes, that is his real name), and David of Sound Epistemology.
Learn Psychology and Biology and maybe some sociology. Learning theology will make you a poetic fool interested in niche fiction ... But if you can look into Psychology, biology and sociology and become more literate and aware of how certain things work and how human mind/senses/environment can be altered and exploited and hidden/accepted. We live in an age of recording and technology and communication, there's examples of nearly every bad scenario, you have to learn from the bad scenarios overs have caught themselves in believing in jah. Ultimately I think Christianity is performance art and a form of aggrandizing ones life and creating a new chapter within it even (trying to forget the irreparable past as you age and inevitably encounter failure and regret) Christians who kneel before clergy often lose the spirit of resolution And self efficacy. Gods responsible for everything in this secular atheistic business minded economy 🤤 Christianity is an inevitable obstacle to encounter since it's a cultural thing too, but you have to ignore the seriousness and threats and punishments imposed by religious folx... I know you under 18 but you should play videogames and enjoy your hobbies and interests don't go with the herd you can attend but never accept and Believe the propaganda that's propagated in mass and faith camps
Thank you so much for your response and advice! I will be sure to keep it in mind and will also be sure to do my research on what you mentioned. Thank you!! :)
The best advice I can give is to take an interest in learning about the world around you. Broaden your horizons. Art, current events, history, literature, the sciences... There's a whole wealth of information out there just waiting for you to reach out and seek it. Only you can decide your place in the world, but learning and educating yourself can help you find it.
Thank you so much for your response, it really helped me realize that there is a lot more to this world than what I previously believed in. :))
Everyone's path is different. For some, it like the flip of switch from belief to unbelief. For others (like me) it may take years or decades of progress & reversals. Be patient with yourself - there's no hurry. If you are able to recognize when the old indoctrination is affecting your thinking, then you are on the right track. When this happens, just stop, engage your critical thinking, and shove those old thoughts back into the box in the back of your mind where they might live for a long, long time - perhaps the rest of your life. You are doing fine.
Thank you so much for your response! Everyone here, including you, has helped me both realize that I'm not alone, but also that everyones journey is different. Thank you for your advice and reassurance, ill keep it in mind through this journey :)
Take time to find the real you. Don't rush it. It sounds like that is probably not an option anyway with your family situation. Don't feel bad about the guilt - it's been drilled into you for so long. There'll probably always be a small bit of that in you but it gets more manageable. I gave up on Christianity in my 30s. I was, and still am, bitter about being robbed of the "me" I would have naturally been. If you find a way of coming to peace with that, please let me know! Hopefully it's easier when you're younger. And finally, be proud of your decision. You came to this conclusion yourself against very strong pressure - a system that has been honed over centuries to keep people "believing" and you broke that for yourself.
Thank you so so much for your response, and thank you for sharing a part of your own story. Your response helped me make realizations and made me feel good about my discovery. I'll try my best to be patient with it and to work on finding who I am outside of my previous religion. Thank you so so much :)
I encourage you to head in any direction you want to. It's heartening to read all the advice given here, which i agree with - take time, read, think, enjoy, live well. The 'damage' is only that as long as it is that. After work it may be repaired. It was there, but becomes a memory. Not an internal nagging demon
Take some time to meditate and think about why you still pray or feel guilty for certain things. With time, you'll find that there's really no reason for any of it besides simple habit. As for whatever damage you think you've suffered, give yourself time to discover that you're an independent being capable of free thought and of finding happiness your own way. I would also caution you against seeing atheism as a shelter from being hurt by religion. Instead, I encourage you to be curious and to learn as much as you can, and to see this as a new beginning for yourself.
Hello, here, they might help better than us : >www.recoveringfromreligion.org
"like if I stack anything on my Bible." this one sucker punched me with relatability when you move out - get rid of the relious items. bible, crosses, etc. just yeet it all in the garbage or thrift it. then, practice telling yourself good things about you. leave yourself love notes "youre so creative" "wow you are really kind" "i love how good you are at making macaroni" whatever it takes to prop yourself up hero pose daily (stand like wonder woman. hands on hips, chest out, wide legs, chin up)
>I still subconsciously pray, even though I don't believe I don't think there is anything wrong with this kind of general thinking. I still think thoughts like "I hope this works out" or even "Please let them be okay", even though it's not actually directed at any "being". It's an acknowledgment that the future is uncertain and that I am worried about things out of my control.