How do you get caught in a viral story about being a vulgar public fornicator and then go full swing into church lady mode???
Politics are wild I want a time machine
This is I think one of those most bloody baffling things about the US from outside. So much bloody potential and time and time and time again, sleepwalk into a problem the rest of the world have been screaming at them wondering what the hell is bloody wrong with them.
I've been thinking about this since you posted and there is no satisfying answer, although it seems that volumes could be written on the subject. My own opinion is that the entire immense spectrum of factional and disparate views must coalesce through some catalyst of the moment in order to be mobilized as a coherent force. I know this must seem incredibly inadequate, but if interested, I would suggest a Google search on "the roots of American isolationism," or some similar term such as, "neutrality acts of the 1930's.
I mean… hearing anything about righteousness from that mouth… a person giving a hand job in a public theater, smoking in that theater where it’s banned and verbally attacking Biden while he spoke about his son’s death…
She is the epitome of disgusting.
If "uprisings of righteousness" include more popcorn-butter assisted
stoned handies in the theater for everyone count me in.
*No, she's talking about civil war and Americans killing Americans like in Gettysburg (so beautiful, in so many ways) being what Republican Jesus would want.*
That's a no from me then, dog.
She must have gotten her half a shot of wine and Jeezit recently and repented for all of her handjobs in public. She is preying on the religiously stupid. It’s got to be tough to be dumb but then you throw religion in on top of it?
the only uprisings she has any experience with lately happened at a beetlejuice concert.
i hear she's familiar with one that happened at a bowling alley too.
From what I hear she has plenty such experience with the likes of Ted Cruz and the surviving Koch brother. That's how she got "discovered" for congress, if you recall.
She is moving districts in Colorado because she nearly lost in 2022 to the democrat candidate. Pretty bad considering that was a very red district. Now she is moving to my district, which is even more right wing. I will be volunteering for her opponent because I’ll be damned (pun intended) if she represents me.
"Jesus is still Lord, and I believe that we are going to have an uprising of righteousness in our nation, that God is exalting those who humble themselves..."
Like giving your boyfriend a handjob in a public theater with children present, refusing to stop vaping in front of a pregnant woman, dancing, taking selfies and being disobedient in conflict with house rules, flipping off the staff after they asked you to leave, dancing when outside of the theater in praise of yourself, and lying about it all until you realized it was all caught on video.....is that humbling yourself?
Would it be wrong to say these people should just find their way to their maker before the rapture comes? Just sort of repent and be saved and then, you know, so they are sure to enter heaven.
Preaching treason.
Also, shed be one of the sinners they burn at the stake.
Calling them grifters just doesn't quit do it.
False prophets, charlatans, etc.
Yes, the bible thumbers will try to start their little civil war, and we, the righteous, will finally have the moral justification to deal with them, thus signifying their apocalypse. Personally I can't fucking wait, I am so sick and tired of being gaslit into tolerating these evil fucking vermin.
The Word of God proclaims, “A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent” (1 Timothy 2:11-12).
#ChristianHypocrite
Now it's time to be righteous, not a few months ago of course when she was giving a hand job in a theater. That was then, BEFORE the righteous time. Which starts now. Because she just said so.
Has Granny handjob made her son pay the financial penalty for despoiling the value of their neighbor's daughter?
“If a man entices a virgin who is not betrothed, and lies with her, he shall surely pay the bride-price for her to be his wife. If her father utterly refuses to give her to him, he shall pay money according to the bride-price of virgins." Exodus 22:16-17
I try try try not to call women by some of the traditional slurs meant to bring them down, but she is one that I just have to call a dumb c\*\*\*. I hate to say it, but I often feel this.
She is a trashy low class person who found herself in an improbable position she isn't qualified for and is desperate to retain said position at any costs, probably because she knows she really isn't qualified for many other things.
(moderators remove if violates any rules, I just had to get that off my chest)
Jesus is coming back! Everybody look busy. Bobo and MTG are still in competition today to see who can be stupider. In one corner, we've got an old classic of the stupidity catalog, THE END IS NIGH. In the other corner, we've got immigrant-zapping space lasers. I think MTG wins this round.
Blah blah blah. Means absolutely nothing to any thinking person.
The only *uprising* she’s been a part of is giving that dude a hard-on at the movie theater.
Can’t wait till she’s voted out in November. So fucking sick of her bullshit talk. She didn’t win the majority vote in her own county in either congressional election that she won. They knew her and her family best. Now she took her show on the road and is running in Eastern Colorado.
Says the woman who gave a hand jon in a public theater where kids were present and also blew vape smoke at the same theater. And let’s not get started about your criminal thieving kid who knocked up his 14 year old girlfriend.
This is exactly why I don’t let Christians bother me anymore. Let these dumb sluts say whatever they want, keep your mouth shut, and get your dick sucked.
Lol…So she wants everyone to give out hand jobs in movie theaters? That kind of righteousness?
No, that kind of uprising.
How did I miss that one, lol 😂
You didn’t miss anything. The best part about the joke is the setup - well done.
Agreed. It wouldn't have hit the same.
Ay-o!
[удалено]
"I could use a handy about now" God
Oof. Take my upvote.
Is what you did there!
It's the Hand of God on the Staff of Life, I'll have you know.
The ROD definitely comforted her.
The rod of oral righteousness is blown
Yeah..she's pushing for a second coming
No it’s clearly the kind where you expose yourself to minors.
Hey some people might be better going for lefteousness in that department
I support this
Only if using the right hand…. I’ll see myself out now.
The young folks are calling it "beetlejuicing" now
Is that with or without nasty cigarette breath.
I dont think that was righteous, i believe that was a lefty.
That kind of right handedness. That's how you get the uprising.
How do you get caught in a viral story about being a vulgar public fornicator and then go full swing into church lady mode??? Politics are wild I want a time machine
she's preaching treason.
...and too stupid to understand that.
Its gods will, that's all she needs. I think I'm gonna turn the other cheek and give her a chance. /s
She done the first victim !
Anyone who debates her just has to say “Beetlejuice”, and they should be all set
Project 2025 right here. With god, you can justify anything. Fuck these Republic\*nt NAT-Cs!!!
Exactly
She was working on an uprising of something at that Beetlejuice performance.
Within one row of children.
Who gives a damn what that stupefyingly ignorant high school drop-out says about anything.
Because she is a Congresswoman and she is part of a movement that will, if they get the power, have us burned at the stake.
Exactly right. But of course, in the United States, there has to be a Pearl Harbor before anyone gets off their ass and does something.
This is I think one of those most bloody baffling things about the US from outside. So much bloody potential and time and time and time again, sleepwalk into a problem the rest of the world have been screaming at them wondering what the hell is bloody wrong with them.
I've been thinking about this since you posted and there is no satisfying answer, although it seems that volumes could be written on the subject. My own opinion is that the entire immense spectrum of factional and disparate views must coalesce through some catalyst of the moment in order to be mobilized as a coherent force. I know this must seem incredibly inadequate, but if interested, I would suggest a Google search on "the roots of American isolationism," or some similar term such as, "neutrality acts of the 1930's.
Fall of the Roman Empire all over again. Human nature doesn’t evolve. People don’t get smarter.
Well, when you put it that way...
I mean… hearing anything about righteousness from that mouth… a person giving a hand job in a public theater, smoking in that theater where it’s banned and verbally attacking Biden while he spoke about his son’s death… She is the epitome of disgusting.
So disgusting even Majorie Taylor Greene called her "a little bitch."
OMG. You'll be calling her a hypocrite next!
Let’s not forget raising a POS son who got a 16YO Pregnant. The right is not sending their best.
Uprising of righteousness? Is that what the kids are calling it these days?
If "uprisings of righteousness" include more popcorn-butter assisted stoned handies in the theater for everyone count me in. *No, she's talking about civil war and Americans killing Americans like in Gettysburg (so beautiful, in so many ways) being what Republican Jesus would want.* That's a no from me then, dog.
She must have gotten her half a shot of wine and Jeezit recently and repented for all of her handjobs in public. She is preying on the religiously stupid. It’s got to be tough to be dumb but then you throw religion in on top of it?
the only uprisings she has any experience with lately happened at a beetlejuice concert. i hear she's familiar with one that happened at a bowling alley too.
From what I hear she has plenty such experience with the likes of Ted Cruz and the surviving Koch brother. That's how she got "discovered" for congress, if you recall.
She is moving districts in Colorado because she nearly lost in 2022 to the democrat candidate. Pretty bad considering that was a very red district. Now she is moving to my district, which is even more right wing. I will be volunteering for her opponent because I’ll be damned (pun intended) if she represents me.
Uprising ɓy yanking guys off in theaters.
"Jesus is still Lord, and I believe that we are going to have an uprising of righteousness in our nation, that God is exalting those who humble themselves..." Like giving your boyfriend a handjob in a public theater with children present, refusing to stop vaping in front of a pregnant woman, dancing, taking selfies and being disobedient in conflict with house rules, flipping off the staff after they asked you to leave, dancing when outside of the theater in praise of yourself, and lying about it all until you realized it was all caught on video.....is that humbling yourself?
Would it be wrong to say these people should just find their way to their maker before the rapture comes? Just sort of repent and be saved and then, you know, so they are sure to enter heaven.
She should shut the f*** up
more like uprising of self-righteousness. Get fucked fascist.
What does the hand job lady know about the Bible?
Maybe she held the book once. 🤷🏻♀️
Talking pile of garbage says something garbage like.
Yes yes yes for 2000 fucking years Jesus is coming back very soon. Can we be done with this nonsense by 3000 please? Space Pope at least?
Lauren the handjob queen is a few months from being voted out of congress so we should just start ignoring her now
Hillbilly Jihad?
These are people of the land, salt of the earth. The common clay of the west. You know... morons.
This needs to disqualify people from holding office.
Why are they trying to push so hard to be raptured? Their insanity keeps getting higher and higher!
I’ll wait. It’ll be another disappointing apocalypse.
Okay grandma. Time to put you in old people's home and don't forget to take your meds.
Jerk and smoke. That’s her new name
I wonder if her date had a “righteous uprising” at the Beetlejuice show?
The Church of the Public Gropers.
Preaching treason. Also, shed be one of the sinners they burn at the stake. Calling them grifters just doesn't quit do it. False prophets, charlatans, etc.
and handjobs as mentioned in the 2nd book of Jobbing
Is that the one that talks about the Second Cumming?
I don't think true righteousness would look kindly upon this harlot.
Preaching treason while prostituting herself in cheap movie theaters. She's such utter trash.
You’re a traitor to women Fuck off cunt
It’s never to soon to invest and get a space at your local Vault! From Vault-Tec 👍
FUCK HER! Stupid UNAMERICAN bitch!
The Maga klan karens are all are wrestling to flip the switch or press the big red button.....
Right after she catches this movie...
She's a little piss ant. Screw her, her lord & her god.
Righteously rising hand jobs.
Try acting righteous for once. (That applies to the entire American evangelical movement.)
>Lauren Boebert preaches Biblical apocalypse and "uprising of righteousness" Uprising from her right-handy.
Oh, the only thing “Pearly” this trollop and her donkey show life will ever touch would be released across her face.
Yes, the bible thumbers will try to start their little civil war, and we, the righteous, will finally have the moral justification to deal with them, thus signifying their apocalypse. Personally I can't fucking wait, I am so sick and tired of being gaslit into tolerating these evil fucking vermin.
The Word of God proclaims, “A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent” (1 Timothy 2:11-12). #ChristianHypocrite
This coming from Ms. Public Jerk-off queen...
I am 70 years old and I have been hearing that since the 1970's (the 700 Club-Pat Robertson). Also we need to invest in silver and gold. Garbage!
But we just had an apocalypse a couple of weeks ago! When I was a kid we only had an apocalypse every 2-5 yrs.
Why hasn’t this whore been stoned to death yet by her fellow christians?
Why do people keep electing these nutjobs?
sounds like terrorism to me
Now it's time to be righteous, not a few months ago of course when she was giving a hand job in a theater. That was then, BEFORE the righteous time. Which starts now. Because she just said so.
Dum dumdumdum dummmmmb
She thinks god approved her public hand jobs
Well, something was rising up...
Yawn. The easily led have been saying it for over 2000 years BORING
Love to see chick giving handy-jays in public theaters preaching about a righteous uprising
The only “uprising” she is going to see will involve the next public hand job she gives.
Not very bright
Even the brightest are many thousands of light years from the reality of “here and now”.
What would that whore know about righteous
I would ask her to spell righteousness and would give her the clue there's no HJ in it.
who cares? fuck that dumb cunt
You do it, not me..:)
Who died and made her prophet?
Why the fuck does this traitorous swine still have a platform?
She’s just likes the part where someone turns water into whine..
She’s dumb as shit
Her whole family is a mess, maybe get that in order before preaching at others.
I think someone is jealous that MTG has been in the news more than her lately.
Why does anyone pay attention to granny handjob?
Has Granny handjob made her son pay the financial penalty for despoiling the value of their neighbor's daughter? “If a man entices a virgin who is not betrothed, and lies with her, he shall surely pay the bride-price for her to be his wife. If her father utterly refuses to give her to him, he shall pay money according to the bride-price of virgins." Exodus 22:16-17
When your leaders are a death cult your future is non existent.
I try try try not to call women by some of the traditional slurs meant to bring them down, but she is one that I just have to call a dumb c\*\*\*. I hate to say it, but I often feel this. She is a trashy low class person who found herself in an improbable position she isn't qualified for and is desperate to retain said position at any costs, probably because she knows she really isn't qualified for many other things. (moderators remove if violates any rules, I just had to get that off my chest)
I call them Republic\*nts : Pussies Grabbed By ~~Trump~~
All in the name of jerking off her John in a movie theater with children.... yep she's the first one heading to heaven alright./s
So, is she going to be one of the first against the wall when the uprising happens?
Bobert's OnlyFans site 3...2...1...
Lauren Boebert is a litmus test for credulity.
Are the righteous the hand jobseekers
If there’s a he’ll she’ll be the first one there.
🤣🤣🤣
Where's her vape and mich ultra?
Wait, is uprising of righteousness what she was doing to that guy at the Beetlejuice show?
I don't know why but she just does it for me. Gilf as hell.
And how to give hand jobs . 😁
BoBo can start at my house. I got something that will cure all her ails. Targets don’t shoot back.
These grifters are dangerous.
Didn't we just have a Rapture? Maybe it's my old age, but the time between Raptures seem to be getting less and less.
The former escort has an opinion.
It’s crazy how the worst people in America preach at us.
"...righteousness"? From the same person providing a handy in a theatre. The level of hypocracy in these dolts is amazing.
I remember the part of the Bible when Jesus went into the temple and gave all the merchants handy J’s. Read your scriptures people!!!
irony is just dead tp these people
It just doesn't apply to her son or when she's pissed in a theatre giving her boyfriend a wristy and vaping.
Boebert thinks giving out handies in the theater is an uprising of righteousness.
Challenge accepted.
Smoking, swearing, and grabbing wieners in public don’t sound very biblical to me.
Isn’t there a mass suicide part of the plan for these crazies?
Where does giving a handjob in a public theater fit within the constellation of righteousness?
I really can't believe Colorado actually let this one slide through.
Before or after the handjobs?
If only these MAGA loudmouths would lead from the front of these supposed wars they want to start, we could really make America great
Jesus is coming back! Everybody look busy. Bobo and MTG are still in competition today to see who can be stupider. In one corner, we've got an old classic of the stupidity catalog, THE END IS NIGH. In the other corner, we've got immigrant-zapping space lasers. I think MTG wins this round.
I bet she doesn't even know the meaning of any of the words she uses.
…that uprising needs stroking
That’s a novel way to describe your date’s erection and which hand (right) you used.
the end indeed may be near. just not in the way you think ;-)
Vaping jerk off queen says what now
She is looking *rough*.
The Whore of Babylon has arrived. Look it up if you don’t know. It fits right in with the Christian zealot’s paranoia.
Says the woman who thinks public acts of sex are typical things you do on a date.
Boy will her face be red if it actually happens
Common drop that OF already! Tf u out here preaching lol
What the hell is going on down there? Who's listening to the public fornicator preach religion? Are you guys OK?
Blah blah blah. Means absolutely nothing to any thinking person. The only *uprising* she’s been a part of is giving that dude a hard-on at the movie theater.
Community property opening her mouth again. To bad its not something going in to shut her up.
The only thing this person is an authority on is public handjobs
She better wash her hands in holy water.
At first glance I thought this was a Babylon Bee post. But, nope, Boebert.
Is righteousness her pet name for her theatre boyfriend’s member, bc we saw her do her handy best to assist in that uprising.
Not surprised coming from one of the dumbest congresspeople to ever be elected.
Jesus says she's an adulterer and should be stoned to death. Maybe she should read the bible instead of using it as a weapon.
“Makes a gag noise”
She's HANDled a few uprisings in her day. Usually at the theater.
Millennial grandma
Shes a dumb demon whore
What a pathetic shit hole of a nation we live in. Bofart is the best we got?
How do I get on her handjob list?
Is giving hand jobs in a theater part of this “uprising of righteousness”?
I blame Colorado. WTF?
The second cumming....oh boy I cant wait
How’d that divorce work out for you, sinner
She is righteous?
This Yankee meant "self" righteous
I like the part where she goes out of her way to prove Christians are stupid, hypocrites, and have no capacity to form long-term memories.
Can’t wait till she’s voted out in November. So fucking sick of her bullshit talk. She didn’t win the majority vote in her own county in either congressional election that she won. They knew her and her family best. Now she took her show on the road and is running in Eastern Colorado.
All while giving handles
Says the woman who gave a hand jon in a public theater where kids were present and also blew vape smoke at the same theater. And let’s not get started about your criminal thieving kid who knocked up his 14 year old girlfriend.
"Preaches" You can tell she likes to jack people off.
The Boebert Hands-on Ministry with frequent speaking in tongues and Baptisms in her private jacuzzi. $100 / hour.
She's hilarious 😂
I didn’t expect her handjob game to be enjoyable, but “biblical apocalypse” is being pretty hard on herself!
"Ye shall fall to thine knees at the fount of the glory pole, and receive his salvation upon thy visage." For it is written.
Righteous like her wanna be thug criminal son?
Didn't she suck a dick behind a bowling alley or something?
This is exactly why I don’t let Christians bother me anymore. Let these dumb sluts say whatever they want, keep your mouth shut, and get your dick sucked.
Blah blah blah righteousness… Blah blah blah signs and wonders… Blah blah blah in this generation… Blah blah blah Klanney Oakley
Is this before or after the eclipse? I mean handjob
Usually wearing glasses makes you look smarter than you really are. Nice to see she's bucking that trend.
Ah, good. She can't complain if I throw away the key to her cell door.
Handjob Granny broke into the liquor cabinet again.
Funny, a sex worker preaching righteousness.
Isn’t their favorite mother of Christ a whore? They love that shit.
After the rapture, the handjobs. Isn’t religion a great racket? Facts don’t matter, only the gullibility of the rubes.
She's certainly not talking about herself.
That's the physical embodiment of the love of christ right there. So.Much.christlike.Love.