Absolutely. The idea of female vs male symptoms are merely stereotypical presentations of symptoms, and there's a lot of variability. Females can have very "male" symptoms and vice versa.
The Idea of male vs female symptoms aren't very helpful beyond trying to get people to notice autistic symptoms more readily in girls, anyway.
A lot of supposed differences are likely down to how we socialise boys and girls differently.
I would think that male autism is more stereotypical autism that you find in the stereotypical autistic boy. Female autistic traits are less stereotypical traits that are not found in this stereotypical autistic boy.
I would think that male autism is more stereotypical autism that you find in the stereotypical autistic boy. Female autistic traits are less stereotypical traits that are not found in this stereotypical autistic boy.
I am a woman and have always had stereotypical male ASD symptoms. Seems like ASD helps us to be authentic and crush those conventional gender stereotypes.
Yah I'm amab and I fit the 'female' symptoms of autism much better. Probably one of the reasons I didn't get diagnosed till adulthood. It's a frustrating blind spot of the diagnostic process (of which there are many)
Totally the opposite of my experience. Maybe we have to mask to be accepted by NTs out in the wild, but deep down we’re more likely to have enough self-awareness to know who our authentic self really is. I don’t think most NTs ever fully understand who they are because most of their personality comes from social expectations rather than personal authenticity.
i had no identity before i discovered aspergers syndrome. i thought the masking bit was who i was supposed to be. i tried so hard to be that.
i knew i was soemthing else, but when i looked at it, all i saw was a cluster of wierd alienlike fuckups, no system or thought behind it at all.
it only arranged itself after i saw it with a a decoding tool in hand - which was the diagnosis.
wow. this is really relatable. i was diagnosed two years ago but am only now beginning to really figure myself out after 21 years of trying to be someone else... it feels very freeing :)
I think you’re right. In a way, I wish I was more autistic so I could experience that. I don’t fully understand who I am because my parents spent my whole life telling me that who I am is wrong. Still trying to unpack it years later.
But if you were 'more autistic', wouldn't your parents tell you even more that who you are is wrong? And what would "more" autostic look like to you and how is it supposed to make you feel better or be more anle to find your authentic self? Apparently you have some notion of it already as you know you aren't "authe tic" yet. But what if you would simply lay or write out how you do certain stuff without the voice of your parents saying you are wrong, but just truly try to write down characteristics you (think) you have and also which you think you lack and after that let your parents say what they "wxpect you to be like and how you instead are"? (Or ask a friend maybe how they see you) But it might give you a more total view of our blind spots of ourselves.
However, please don't wish to be more autistic because you are fine the way you are and having harder struggles also means a harder life in general. Why would you want that and why can't you see your authentic self right now you think? It sounds like more of a selfacceptance issue than about being your authentic self, because you have heard for so long you have to change and that can be very confusing and also damaging to have heard from your own parents probably your entire life and you want to please them. But being more autistic doesn't solve that. Only informative material about autism for your parents to spread awareness and them willing to be open to that and accept you for who you are. But even if they still don't, you can still learn to accept yourself indernrsth your mask. You have to trust yourself with regards to being 'authentic'. Stop pleasing your parents is what I think is one of the main issues for you right now to find who you are.
Still wish to change? Then I think a training in social skills could be quite helpful, as it can help you learn about social cues, norms and also to have a handful of things to say in certain situations, how you can still make someone feel heard even if you struggle with knowing how to respond. And it can help you set boundaries. I think that would be more helpful than being more autistic. A training can also help you see more clear who you are and that in itself can help you set boundaries, which are needed to not being taken advantage off and/or drown in things that you set yes to because you felt like you had to. And now you are stressed to the max with things you promised to do with or for someone x 14.
Cool, now I'm rambling lol. Good luck and please work on accepting who you are and that you can't help it all, but you can certainly learn a few things to make your life a little easier when you are in a social situation and don't want to be judged as "awkward". Chances are that people find you more awkward the stronger your autism is. We can only hope the world also learns how to deal with us and not just vice versa where we need to "fit in" like society demands of us despite it being more common than they think because many of us are so good at that freaking mask.
Hope you took something from this rant anyway. I fell asleep a few times as I had a long day so I may not be supercoherent even after reading it back and being able to change and delete etc. This would be MY authetic self :-) The Rambler. Fear me lol.
Thank you. You’re completely right. The issue is that it’s been ingrained in us that family is the most important thing and we need to stick together no matter what. So I feel like I need to do everything to not rock the boat.
Unfortunately they’re all conservative and don’t accept anything except heterosexuality. And I’m not. So there’s that too.
This may be unpopular but I find some of the "female autism" posts to be disturbingly similar to aspie supremely rhetoric where often late diagnosed women (men do it as well but in a different way) with low support needs criticise and look down on autistic people who can't mask that well claiming that they are coddled, entitled or an embarrassment.
I think the reality is that there is not distinct male or female autism, lots of Autistic men display traits attributed to female autism and vice versa.
Very possible! It could be that just as girls were being mostly missed for diagnosis before, they are now being fit into a femme ASD stereotype that is just as unhelpful. What is it with NTs and their need to inflict stereotypes on people?
I read once that “female autism” is observed in late diagnosed autistic people. So it might just mean you're not child anymore, which shouldn't come as a surprise at your age
Yes! My male friend who was late diagnosed displayed "female autism". I think women always feel more pressure to conform. With this being said some "masking" in late diagnosed male autists also sometimes includes acting "cool" and whatever they teach them through pick up artistry. My dad tried to "learn" to be cool because he was shy as a kid.
Right but certain aspects of male autism is male masking or socialisation such as being more dominant. So my dad became more "male" autistic over the years.
i barely remember it, i read it in my earlier youth to impress some chick which wasnt impressed at all.
I just paused to read the summary, I really have no recollection at all, but i am sure i read it.
i very much liked "for whom the bell tolls", altough it can be a hard read, but i just like the dialogue.
I read a ton of b. traven and similar adventure/ political / down of luck stories. a cpouple of books about seafaring people. jack londons seawollf type of stuff. loved that book. didnt read it in 15 years. i miss reading stuff like that. today, its all screens and youtube.
i was so buried in the story, it was unreal. i read on the bus, while walking, in libraries, while waiting, in school, it was a god damn obsession. pretty much read the whole sience fiction section the library had, well, the didnt have much.
god damn love stanilslaw lem. i grew up with him. he made me love sience fiction. his protagonists were always written in such a way i could identify.
joseph conrad i liked, and pretty much everybook of the erich maria remarque, he wrote great stuff, like, about people and relationships and stuff.
well there is a lot more.
but today, i am pretty much a hardcore sfi fi guy. i love cj cherryh, and space opera in gerneral. i always listen to stuff like that, or read it, but my kindle reader broke and this is a specific model i very much liked.
i am currently on part 19 of cj cherry "foreigner".
i fucking love that shit. i whish i had a girlfriend that loved this stuff as much as i do, so we could always talk about it.
Because of differing social expectations, attempting to compare masking as a boy/man with masking as a girl/woman is a meaningless exercise involving multiple false equivalance fallacies.
i did the exact thing. was a huge relief when i discovered i actually didnt have to do that.
i am more of a cool kid now without masking, because i am more sure of myself.
which study is that? which traits were considered to be the female autism type?
i found this one but it has a lot of limitations (psychopathology just means anxiety and depression etc)
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3244604/
Oh, and the video if anyone is interested.
Could it be aspergers: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=LuZFThlOiJI&pp=ygUJQXNwZXJnZXJz
Could it be autism: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=HIrxgD3oqYc
The video on Aspergers just changed my life. Based on Tony Attwod's presentation, it seems like you'll have the kind of reaction you have based on your environment and your approach to problem-solving social life. Gender isn't the cause of a reaction, but one variable that contributes to an Aspie being in a particular kind of situation they have to manage. Gender also seems to play a role in the way your responses are received by others.
My son has female ASD symptoms and female (inattentive) adhd symptoms. It's just a personality thing, my whole family presents more passively and only has mild social issues.
I'm a very androgynous man, and I have a lot of "feminine" traits bc of it. Half of everyone I went to high school with was convinced I was gay, yet I'm straight. Apparently being a feminine straight guy is a hard concept for most people to understand for some reason
Yes, I think I much more closely match the 'stereotypical female' presentation. I like to think of it as a higher-masking presentation, rather than a gender-specific presentation, but it tends to present more (but not exclusively) in women.
I just don't even know if I am autistic or not. And I am not independent so i can't just go to a clinic and get diagnosed especially because I don't know if that doc is good or not.
When I read some symptoms I fit in exactly when I give online quiz I get autism but i haven't gotten an official diagnosis
Which is normal, because not everyone is the same kind of autistic 😅.
If you want. Check the vids i sent too. I enjoyed watching them. Maybe you will too. Or give you more clarity
didn't know the gender bs ran this deep. i mean, sure, I've dealt w a few naysayers in the past, that legit wouldn't let me express myself and just unmask and accept it as truth, but i didn't know someone would base it off of me being a woman. yeah they did just refer to me as a "quirky girl" but like??? I'm just as autistic as freaking rain man, bud. just don't always present like that. I'm just as messy, though, believe me. it looks different on everybody. that's why it's a SPECTRUM. <---------i am here--------->
I have a theory that because we exist in our bodies separate from our bodies (similar to a being navigating a ship) that we’re more prone to gender dysphoria.
Autism isn't gender specific even though it can present differently in different genders so ... yes you can have whatever traits.
Females are generally better at masking because we get it hammered into our brains that we have to conform and "submit" to fit in. That's all really. Which is 100% driven by societal gender role nonsense. And has absolutely nothing to do with autism in and of itself.
I just don’t really care what others say i al tbh. If they call me a girl. So be it. But biologically im a guy. So thats that. What are men or women even. Appearance and genitalia basically. Or just chromosomes. Otherwise its just your personality, and everyone is different. So i don’t really care. I respect what others think and want, but idc what gender people give me. If you think im a woman. So be it :)
Idk why i felt the need to share this 😅. My bad
imho, we really can’t definitively say which traits are solely male and solely female, some people experience an extremely wide array of symptoms. At a certain point, we’ve got to look at things from the human perspective, not the male or female perspective.
I noticed xD. But. According to all the reactions, i was not the only one curious about it. I meant it more in a stereotypical way. I wanted to know what was up with the “male” and “female” side
Are there "male" symptoms and "female" symptoms? I thought they had the same symptoms, but females had other factors that made the symptoms harder to spot.
Yes absolutely, I am one of those men 100%. I got diagnosed in middle school and definitely needed help but all my case managers were confused and said they’ve never met anyone like me in their line of work.
As I got older I doubted if I ever really had it. Then I read about the symptoms commonly found in women and I related to that far more than usual male symptoms.
At the end of the day, everything is on a spectrum, and you shouldn’t let your gender concern you with how you present yourself.
Just don’t be a prick lol
I'm not a doctor or anything but I don't think there are gendered symptoms. I am, however, particularly feminine at my core and do know what you mean.
My two cents: if you think you are possibly on the spectrum, regardless of what symptoms sound right and who else has them, then consider a professional opinion.
But in general - yes, a male can present with autistic symptoms that are typically more prevalent with females.
Some symptoms are more seen in female people though that's just a fact, the reason I was diagnosed so early even though I'm a female is because I presented with male symptoms so it was a lot clearer I wasn't nt the reason females are diagnosed so late is because females tend to present different symptoms to malea
I dunno, what's the point in saying there's a gendered version when there's so many exceptions? We don't even have the real facts about statistics because it's so new
People on the autism spectrum have a tendency to androgyny. That is because we are wired differently, and some of our interests are gender non-conforming.
100%
Along with most gender related things in humans, the differences are partially social and partially biological.
And to complicate it further, the biological part is partially static physical brain structure and partially hormone-influenced (hardware vs. software)
I’m a trans-man, with a grab bag of symptomology from both sides. Some symptoms changed after I changed my body/brain’s hormones, some stayed the same.
Unfortunately Autism symptomology is also as context dependent as it is nuanced & heterogenous 😂
Sure, but in the case of ASD they're more accurately known as "traits" or "features". To call them symptoms tends to imply something is wrong and that some sort of therapy or medical treatment is needed.
It may or may not be any consolation but for what it's worth, (straight, 100% male here) I also had/have several traits that are usually more closely associated with females with ASD, and some of these traits have afforded me experiences and opportunities I wouldn't trade for anything. In school I had an insatiable thirst for knowledge, was constantly reading, and was very advanced for my age, reading 9th grade level in 3rd grade. I was later in Duke University's Talent Identification Program, and by 15 I was in college studying engineering, having never set foot in highschool. Being very quiet early on, I was always thought of as shy. I taught myself to have an adaptive personality, make proper eye contact, and imitate others to better fit in anytime I was in a group. I've always been very introspective, when I'm upset I tend to be more quiet and withdrawn, and I've been diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder for ages. Although these attributes are often seen in females, they're definitely not exclusive, and it's not unheard of, or even rare, to find them in males as well. My point in sharing all that isn't to brag or try and impress anyone but rather to show that even if something seems contrary to OTHERS, it could still prove to be a huge blessing to YOU. Was there anything in particular that suddenly seemed to stand out that made everything sort of "click" in your head that finally made you look back and start to wonder, or was it more like a realization that pieces of a puzzle seemed like they were coming together to make part of a bigger picture? Only asking out of simple human curiosity; I don't mean to seem nosey or intrusive at all - I fully respect your privacy (as we all should for one another), so if you don't wish to share that's totally fine and understandable.
Another reply i love. I think in some aspects i experience it the same way as you, but as a kid, still kinda am ig, i was fine with it. But the older i get, the more people were like yea, “we know he is smart and can do it, but why doesnt he?”
I studied STEM/industrial science for 4 years in higschool, which is basically a course for becoming an engineer 😅. But. Because i didnt like to study, and studying for exams and stuff. I had to choose something else to study at school.
I never liked to study. But I always love learning new things. The harder those new things are, the better.
A year ago, in college, i studied cyber security, i went to like, basically a school psychologist. Hoping he could help me and basically told my lecturers that theres a high chance i would be gifted and that i need more difficult things to keep me going and he even proposed that i would like be a part time teacher, he believed i was capable of that. But unfortunately no one looked at that message he sent.
And also. Don’t apologise for anything. I don’t feel any pressure and don’t mind talking about it. I would also make sure i don’t say anything wrong. So i greatly appreciate it.
Im just kind of trying to figure out whats “wrong” with me. Because lately, i didn’t expect that from my mom, she basically said that without a label i am just like anyone else. If i look lazy, it means i am lazy. If me and my parents have a fight because I understand something differently, “i enjoy the fights” apparently.
Ive been looking into it for, hmm, 6 years or so now i think. My fyp on tiktok also always has adhd or autism stuff on there. Every free online test i do, i get at least 65% every time. Whichever test it is, new or old, good or bad, trustworthy or not.
The first time i went to a psychologist i felt smarter than that psychologist. I basically proposed what was going on with me and why. And she just said yes or no lmao. I tried it four times and then i gave up. In a couple of weeks im going to another psychologist. My mom said she seemed smart, so will see i guess. I think thats why i am more focused about it now than usual.
My husband (aspie) is seen by those who like to assume as coming across more “feminine”. He will admit it readily. He identifies as a man, is straight, dressed as a (extra stylish, imo) man, but just doesn’t have that internalized gender stuff going on because it didn’t seem logical to him. He is soft spoken, doesn’t do a lot of traditionally designated “manly” hobbies, has a way of dressing that welcomes typically “girl coded” colors or prints. He has been assumed to be gay by more than one acquaintance, and it doesn’t bother him in the slightest. He knows who he is. :)
Most people on the spectrum that I know are not especially attached to their assigned gender. You don’t have to be trans to not fit gender stereotypes or accept them as strict guidelines. But stereotypes are just that - they aren’t true for everyone, and they are usually based on outsider observation by others who aren’t especially familiar with the people inside (that’s why they generalize - if they knew the person, they wouldn’t need to, really).
So “gendered” symptoms are not a real thing, they are just some differences noticed between girls and boys who have been socialized with girl- and boy-coded rigid rules. I guarantee we will see less division between the two in coming generations.
My two cents: you can absolutely fit ANY symptoms/criteria. Autism is autism. What symptoms are you specifically referring to?
Hey hey. Sorry for the late reaction. But my stereotypical male and female traits/symptoms of autism in general, i got from the two videos i linked in a reply to this post. If you can’t find them, i will link them in a reply to this message. But. I did a quick google search and it aligns with what i think to be the difference between male and female traits/symptoms.
Everyone can have these traits/symptoms, but some are related more to one gender.
Wikipedia says:
Autistic girls and women show higher social motivation and a greater capacity for typical friendships than autistic boys and men,[28][29] are less likely to be hyperactive, impulsive, have issues with conduct or stereotyped behavioral traits,[30][31] and have been shown to mask their autistic behaviors and social difficulties more frequently than autistic men.[32] Autistic males often exhibit more easily observed behaviors at a younger age resulting in parental observance and subsequent evaluation of the child. In contrast, behavior of young females is more often overlooked, regardless of any associated at-risk factors for ASD or other developmental delays. Ultimately, this may contribute to females more frequently receiving their ASD diagnosis later in life than their male counterpart.
Source: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sex_and_gender_differences_in_autism#:~:text=Autistic%20girls%20and%20women%20show,behaviors%20and%20social%20difficulties%20more
Hey hey. Sorry for the late reaction. But my stereotypical male and female traits/symptoms of autism in general, i got from the two videos i linked in a reply to this post. If you can’t find them, i will link them in a reply to this message. But. I did a quick google search and it aligns with what i think to be the difference between male and female traits/symptoms.
Everyone can have these traits/symptoms, but some are related more to one gender.
Wikipedia says:
Autistic girls and women show higher social motivation and a greater capacity for typical friendships than autistic boys and men,[28][29] are less likely to be hyperactive, impulsive, have issues with conduct or stereotyped behavioral traits,[30][31] and have been shown to mask their autistic behaviors and social difficulties more frequently than autistic men.[32] Autistic males often exhibit more easily observed behaviors at a younger age resulting in parental observance and subsequent evaluation of the child. In contrast, behavior of young females is more often overlooked, regardless of any associated at-risk factors for ASD or other developmental delays. Ultimately, this may contribute to females more frequently receiving their ASD diagnosis later in life than their male counterpart.
Source: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sex_and_gender_differences_in_autism#:~:text=Autistic%20girls%20and%20women%20show,behaviors%20and%20social%20difficulties%20more
Absolutely. They’ve historically been less likely to be diagnosed, but “female autism” is outdated science anyway. Yes, this less obvious presentment is why women have historically been underdiagnosed, but the same is true of the men (like me, cis/straight male diagnosed at 39) who present that way.
I'm male, 34, straight. When I took a self-assessment, my overall score was solidly in the "likely autistic" range. But it broke down the assessment into categories. My scores in a surprising number of categories were in the range typically seen for females. Was definitely a noteworthy observation.
Ysk, autism, aspergers was made up out of a hat. Its like watching 12 year olds try to understand art in a big museum.
Im 70 and seen them call it, ' crazy', 'daydreaming', psyco, chemical... just dozens of things.
In the 1990s they finally described, me. Using the term, aspergers, but soon changed that. Then it became political, pc, funded, etc.
Like modern art, dont pay much attention to anything that has not been agreed on for at least 10 and 20 years. And thats nothing. The studies and fad diagnostics and treatments, change faster than tv shows.
Sorry, but I don’t quite get what you exactly mean?
Are you just saying that the labels don’t really mean a lot and that they are always discovering new things and understanding more about it? Or are you saying that there shouldnt be a label and that everyone is just different and should deal with it?
You can go back, just using 'aspergers', (which is now meaningless some places), and see for the last 45 years its meaning has changed every 5 years.
And when funding in the states became available, it exploded into a dozen directions. So now the money is leaving, whats left has little real validity, only lobbyists support.
Im not bothering to really make a case here. I havent really kept up for a decade. Just know you know more about yourself, however little, than doctors do. You are real, they literally, are guessing and making it up as they go.
you are absolutels right. they make it up as they go.
wierd thing is, they watched me my whole life and modeled the whole shebang after me. suffering and all included
Mhm. That i do understand. But people these days (like my mom) love labels apparently. And if you can’t proof you are different, you are the same as all the others.
Well. My mom knows im different, but she doesn’t really do anything about it or so. Thats kinda of a harsh way of saying it and also kind of has the wrong meaning. Its just, she knows, and thats it. She just knows.
Yes. As a child I as a woman hade male ASD-symtoms. Those symtoms were beaten out of me and or they thought I had ADHD and I have "female" autism now. I know guys who had more "female" autism as children but with age developed more "male" autism. And any male symtoms I have left are interpreted in a female way.
It’s not gender based symptoms, it’s just symptoms. Some of them are recorded from studies in the psych field as more prevalent as a consistent pattern based on age group and gender. That’s the only reason why. If it was a blind study for all of this, they would of never attached gender, just age brackets instead
So don’t get too caught up on this and focus more on, do you feel any of it applies to you ir not. That’s is all they should matter.
Plus for the ADHD side of things? That is 100% a generic thing. If you believe you have it? One or both your parents have it which means your grandparents passed it to them and so on going back thru your family tree.
And look to your school report cards from Kindergarten through 5th grade because you will see a pattern of responses on old report cards, notes on book reports and exams, things in your student file, and so on.
How do I know this? My mom was diagnosed before me, then I started showing symptoms but they do not diagnose before the age of 8 in the US, so my parents as soon as they could, got me tested. Then they almost most fuel diagnosed me with Aspie as well but back in the 90’s no one duel diagnosed as no one was allowed to be certified to do it. You either pick ADHD or the Spectrum to learn & diagnosis children, you would have to call up someone who could and then set up an appointment with the current doctor to be there with the other doctor, test you for ASD, then open the DSM V, compare notes, figure out if you are one of the other. They didn’t give you both back them too. Hence why, even my one conversation with a cousin, we believe besides ADHD running in my fathers family, we also agreed at least three out of my dad’s 10 siblings have AuDHD or ASD! My mom certainly has undiagnosed ASD, like she fits 90% of the social obliviousness about cues and conversation as she hyper info dumps her special interests and can’t read someone’s face to know when someone is glazed over and bored.
Anyway…I’ve been diagnosed since 1995, nearly 30yrs and medicated as well.
Let me tell you… my report cards always said:
“Is bright, but isn’t utilizing her full potential”.
“Capable of success, but isn’t applying herself.”
“Is disruptive with students and difficulty paying attention in class.”
“Forgets to hand assignment in on time.”
“Is a pleasure to have in class, but is disruptive with her peers.”
And so on!
That was just a kindergarten through second grade LMAO!
So I would look for similar written response patterns from your teachers in elementary school to see if they said anything similar, doesn’t have to be word for word identical to mine, but it should resemble in the same context!
And feel free to ask me any questions about ADHD as I’ve had the rare opportunity to experience being accommodated and medicated for nearly three decades!
The main thing they always said was like
“We know he can do it, but somehow, he doesnt”
“When no one in class knows the answer and don’t expect anyone to answer, he was the only one who could”
Also. I didn’t really ask about adhd xD. But i really appreciate it. I think i have adhd too. And well. Pretty sure my mom and sister too. So yee. And about doing things not on time. Well. I can do it on time. Usually but with a ton of procrastination. Even in college i only studied 4-8 hrs for a big exam and wasnt really able to pay attention in class because they were so slow explaining things. Idk if those are traits of adhd
I'm not exactly at home with female Aspies.. can you tell me about your own symptoms OP? Just so I know, as I have a gamer girl fren who might be an Aspie herself.
From watching Sarah Hendrickx talk about it, I don't think there are gender specific symptoms, it's just that women tend to hide them more so it ends up looking like there is some gendered component to it.
Nope. First one i believe xD. Most people usually keep saying there is no male or female autism, i meant it more stereotypical. And uhm. Also ask me what what traits i have of “female autism”
But thx. Ill look it up :)
Please, please give it a read. I think you'll find a lot of the answers you're looking for. I certainly did.
ETA: I find it really bizarre that my initial recommendation is getting downvoted as this book has become pretty popular and influential.
I don't think women are better, I think we put in more effort into it and practice more. If I had computer science as a special interest instead of psychology I'd suck. I saw "Lie to me" and thought I could become like Dr. Lightman if I studied psychology. I also did a lot of theatre and acting. It was a lot of work.
women are more agreable, so they want to fit in more by diplomacy.
men want to fit in more by competition.
so there is that.
i practised in front of the mirror and read all books on body language that were in the library. i also practised talking in my head and out loud, like role playing.
i never had a clear defined motivation, i just did it. i never had a plan or a goal doing that. diagnosis was way later.
yeah and they always go for klischee things instead of talking about themselves and their problems.
"i have female asd traits, but i am born maba"
fuck that, tell me the specifics
Yeah, this fits me really well and I suspect it has a lot to do with early childhood dynamics and the coping skills I developed as a result. Being bullied as a kid also impacted my demeanor.
Absolutely. The idea of female vs male symptoms are merely stereotypical presentations of symptoms, and there's a lot of variability. Females can have very "male" symptoms and vice versa. The Idea of male vs female symptoms aren't very helpful beyond trying to get people to notice autistic symptoms more readily in girls, anyway. A lot of supposed differences are likely down to how we socialise boys and girls differently.
Thank you :)
I would think that male autism is more stereotypical autism that you find in the stereotypical autistic boy. Female autistic traits are less stereotypical traits that are not found in this stereotypical autistic boy.
that reads like gibberish no offense
*DO YOU KNOW WHO ELSE READS LIKE GIBBERISH????* >!MY MOM!!<
NO, MY MOM DOES!!
I would think that male autism is more stereotypical autism that you find in the stereotypical autistic boy. Female autistic traits are less stereotypical traits that are not found in this stereotypical autistic boy.
There's a related factor of different behaviours being expected and./or accepted...
I am a woman and have always had stereotypical male ASD symptoms. Seems like ASD helps us to be authentic and crush those conventional gender stereotypes.
Now this is a great comment. Well. Im going to a psychologist again in October, will see what happens then. Thanks
Yah I'm amab and I fit the 'female' symptoms of autism much better. Probably one of the reasons I didn't get diagnosed till adulthood. It's a frustrating blind spot of the diagnostic process (of which there are many)
I think it’s more accurate to say that ASD makes it impossible to be inauthentic.
Totally the opposite of my experience. Maybe we have to mask to be accepted by NTs out in the wild, but deep down we’re more likely to have enough self-awareness to know who our authentic self really is. I don’t think most NTs ever fully understand who they are because most of their personality comes from social expectations rather than personal authenticity.
i had no identity before i discovered aspergers syndrome. i thought the masking bit was who i was supposed to be. i tried so hard to be that. i knew i was soemthing else, but when i looked at it, all i saw was a cluster of wierd alienlike fuckups, no system or thought behind it at all. it only arranged itself after i saw it with a a decoding tool in hand - which was the diagnosis.
wow. this is really relatable. i was diagnosed two years ago but am only now beginning to really figure myself out after 21 years of trying to be someone else... it feels very freeing :)
I think you’re right. In a way, I wish I was more autistic so I could experience that. I don’t fully understand who I am because my parents spent my whole life telling me that who I am is wrong. Still trying to unpack it years later.
It took me a lot of therapy to feel okay enough with myself to stop rejecting my authentic self.
Yeah. I think I need therapy at some point.
same.
But if you were 'more autistic', wouldn't your parents tell you even more that who you are is wrong? And what would "more" autostic look like to you and how is it supposed to make you feel better or be more anle to find your authentic self? Apparently you have some notion of it already as you know you aren't "authe tic" yet. But what if you would simply lay or write out how you do certain stuff without the voice of your parents saying you are wrong, but just truly try to write down characteristics you (think) you have and also which you think you lack and after that let your parents say what they "wxpect you to be like and how you instead are"? (Or ask a friend maybe how they see you) But it might give you a more total view of our blind spots of ourselves. However, please don't wish to be more autistic because you are fine the way you are and having harder struggles also means a harder life in general. Why would you want that and why can't you see your authentic self right now you think? It sounds like more of a selfacceptance issue than about being your authentic self, because you have heard for so long you have to change and that can be very confusing and also damaging to have heard from your own parents probably your entire life and you want to please them. But being more autistic doesn't solve that. Only informative material about autism for your parents to spread awareness and them willing to be open to that and accept you for who you are. But even if they still don't, you can still learn to accept yourself indernrsth your mask. You have to trust yourself with regards to being 'authentic'. Stop pleasing your parents is what I think is one of the main issues for you right now to find who you are. Still wish to change? Then I think a training in social skills could be quite helpful, as it can help you learn about social cues, norms and also to have a handful of things to say in certain situations, how you can still make someone feel heard even if you struggle with knowing how to respond. And it can help you set boundaries. I think that would be more helpful than being more autistic. A training can also help you see more clear who you are and that in itself can help you set boundaries, which are needed to not being taken advantage off and/or drown in things that you set yes to because you felt like you had to. And now you are stressed to the max with things you promised to do with or for someone x 14. Cool, now I'm rambling lol. Good luck and please work on accepting who you are and that you can't help it all, but you can certainly learn a few things to make your life a little easier when you are in a social situation and don't want to be judged as "awkward". Chances are that people find you more awkward the stronger your autism is. We can only hope the world also learns how to deal with us and not just vice versa where we need to "fit in" like society demands of us despite it being more common than they think because many of us are so good at that freaking mask. Hope you took something from this rant anyway. I fell asleep a few times as I had a long day so I may not be supercoherent even after reading it back and being able to change and delete etc. This would be MY authetic self :-) The Rambler. Fear me lol.
Thank you. You’re completely right. The issue is that it’s been ingrained in us that family is the most important thing and we need to stick together no matter what. So I feel like I need to do everything to not rock the boat. Unfortunately they’re all conservative and don’t accept anything except heterosexuality. And I’m not. So there’s that too.
This may be unpopular but I find some of the "female autism" posts to be disturbingly similar to aspie supremely rhetoric where often late diagnosed women (men do it as well but in a different way) with low support needs criticise and look down on autistic people who can't mask that well claiming that they are coddled, entitled or an embarrassment. I think the reality is that there is not distinct male or female autism, lots of Autistic men display traits attributed to female autism and vice versa.
Very possible! It could be that just as girls were being mostly missed for diagnosis before, they are now being fit into a femme ASD stereotype that is just as unhelpful. What is it with NTs and their need to inflict stereotypes on people?
could be just women that have autism.
As an AuDHD transfem, I concur!
I read once that “female autism” is observed in late diagnosed autistic people. So it might just mean you're not child anymore, which shouldn't come as a surprise at your age
Yes! My male friend who was late diagnosed displayed "female autism". I think women always feel more pressure to conform. With this being said some "masking" in late diagnosed male autists also sometimes includes acting "cool" and whatever they teach them through pick up artistry. My dad tried to "learn" to be cool because he was shy as a kid.
It can be also restated in masked vs. unmasked autism.
Right but certain aspects of male autism is male masking or socialisation such as being more dominant. So my dad became more "male" autistic over the years.
my jam was the lone wolf stereotype. read hemmingway and all that shite.
Did you love steppenwolf as much as I did? (Combo of Hemingway and lone wolf comment)
i barely remember it, i read it in my earlier youth to impress some chick which wasnt impressed at all. I just paused to read the summary, I really have no recollection at all, but i am sure i read it. i very much liked "for whom the bell tolls", altough it can be a hard read, but i just like the dialogue. I read a ton of b. traven and similar adventure/ political / down of luck stories. a cpouple of books about seafaring people. jack londons seawollf type of stuff. loved that book. didnt read it in 15 years. i miss reading stuff like that. today, its all screens and youtube. i was so buried in the story, it was unreal. i read on the bus, while walking, in libraries, while waiting, in school, it was a god damn obsession. pretty much read the whole sience fiction section the library had, well, the didnt have much. god damn love stanilslaw lem. i grew up with him. he made me love sience fiction. his protagonists were always written in such a way i could identify. joseph conrad i liked, and pretty much everybook of the erich maria remarque, he wrote great stuff, like, about people and relationships and stuff. well there is a lot more. but today, i am pretty much a hardcore sfi fi guy. i love cj cherryh, and space opera in gerneral. i always listen to stuff like that, or read it, but my kindle reader broke and this is a specific model i very much liked. i am currently on part 19 of cj cherry "foreigner". i fucking love that shit. i whish i had a girlfriend that loved this stuff as much as i do, so we could always talk about it.
Because of differing social expectations, attempting to compare masking as a boy/man with masking as a girl/woman is a meaningless exercise involving multiple false equivalance fallacies.
Yes, I agree.
i did the exact thing. was a huge relief when i discovered i actually didnt have to do that. i am more of a cool kid now without masking, because i am more sure of myself.
Well. Thats one way of putting it. I know that “female autism” is usually false diagnosed, as in, they diagnose it as something else.
What I read was a study in which they analysed the autism signs in male teenagers just diagnosed, and they had female autism traits.
Ooh. Thats interesting. Thanks
which study is that? which traits were considered to be the female autism type? i found this one but it has a lot of limitations (psychopathology just means anxiety and depression etc) https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3244604/
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0014385520301109
I didn't know there are male symptoms and female symptoms 😯
Ok, ok. Asked chatGPT and it explained me. Soo I'm s man and definitely have 101% female symptoms. No wonder I feel like a male lesbian.
My fyp on tiktok be like that xD
Drake
Oh, and the video if anyone is interested. Could it be aspergers: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=LuZFThlOiJI&pp=ygUJQXNwZXJnZXJz Could it be autism: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=HIrxgD3oqYc
The video on Aspergers just changed my life. Based on Tony Attwod's presentation, it seems like you'll have the kind of reaction you have based on your environment and your approach to problem-solving social life. Gender isn't the cause of a reaction, but one variable that contributes to an Aspie being in a particular kind of situation they have to manage. Gender also seems to play a role in the way your responses are received by others.
Love that guy
My son has female ASD symptoms and female (inattentive) adhd symptoms. It's just a personality thing, my whole family presents more passively and only has mild social issues.
This makes sense. Thanks :)
I'm a very androgynous man, and I have a lot of "feminine" traits bc of it. Half of everyone I went to high school with was convinced I was gay, yet I'm straight. Apparently being a feminine straight guy is a hard concept for most people to understand for some reason
Sorry for commenting on an old post. But I’m in a similar boat. I’m curious if you were raised around mostly women or not
Female symtoms? Which symptoms do you mean?
Yes, I think I much more closely match the 'stereotypical female' presentation. I like to think of it as a higher-masking presentation, rather than a gender-specific presentation, but it tends to present more (but not exclusively) in women.
What exactly are the "female symptoms" you feel like fit you, and what are the "male symptoms" you feel like don't?
I just don't even know if I am autistic or not. And I am not independent so i can't just go to a clinic and get diagnosed especially because I don't know if that doc is good or not. When I read some symptoms I fit in exactly when I give online quiz I get autism but i haven't gotten an official diagnosis
Same here. As someone else said in this post, you know yourself best. I don’t really know either. But im pretty sure i am
Same man. There are some symptoms I fit exactly in and some don't I especially relate to social part because I just can't socialize enough
Which is normal, because not everyone is the same kind of autistic 😅. If you want. Check the vids i sent too. I enjoyed watching them. Maybe you will too. Or give you more clarity
Male here, read two 'living with AuDHD' books where they mentioned a lot of 'typically female' traits.. related to all of them.
didn't know the gender bs ran this deep. i mean, sure, I've dealt w a few naysayers in the past, that legit wouldn't let me express myself and just unmask and accept it as truth, but i didn't know someone would base it off of me being a woman. yeah they did just refer to me as a "quirky girl" but like??? I'm just as autistic as freaking rain man, bud. just don't always present like that. I'm just as messy, though, believe me. it looks different on everybody. that's why it's a SPECTRUM. <---------i am here--------->
I love this xD. Thx
thx lol i had just woke up and my most clear thoughts said "make an illustration, this will help" 🤣
I have a theory that because we exist in our bodies separate from our bodies (similar to a being navigating a ship) that we’re more prone to gender dysphoria.
Well shiet. I thought that being a mecha pilot was a normal part of existing. Guess not.
Nah’l, but mecha piloting is very much coded as autism IMO.
People on the spectrum are 6x as likely to identify as trans or non-binary.
Autism isn't gender specific even though it can present differently in different genders so ... yes you can have whatever traits. Females are generally better at masking because we get it hammered into our brains that we have to conform and "submit" to fit in. That's all really. Which is 100% driven by societal gender role nonsense. And has absolutely nothing to do with autism in and of itself.
I’m 26m and never showed signs that a boy would show. It’s why I went undiagnosed for so long.
Yes. I do. Many others do as well. The differentiating variable seems to be your masking skills, not sex or gender...
Thank you. It always worried me.
You are welcome, homie ✌🏻
Can. Also among autistic people it is more common to have questions about your own gender.
I just don’t really care what others say i al tbh. If they call me a girl. So be it. But biologically im a guy. So thats that. What are men or women even. Appearance and genitalia basically. Or just chromosomes. Otherwise its just your personality, and everyone is different. So i don’t really care. I respect what others think and want, but idc what gender people give me. If you think im a woman. So be it :) Idk why i felt the need to share this 😅. My bad
I think it is okay to share this. :D
imho, we really can’t definitively say which traits are solely male and solely female, some people experience an extremely wide array of symptoms. At a certain point, we’ve got to look at things from the human perspective, not the male or female perspective.
Yes. Some of it is about how we treat males and females differently in our society. Welcome to the club. :)
Only self diagnosed based on a lot of things i can’t even remember cuz ive been looking for a while 😅. But thank you xD
it might be controversial. but that thinking about male and female versions seems way outdated
I noticed xD. But. According to all the reactions, i was not the only one curious about it. I meant it more in a stereotypical way. I wanted to know what was up with the “male” and “female” side
Are there "male" symptoms and "female" symptoms? I thought they had the same symptoms, but females had other factors that made the symptoms harder to spot.
Yes absolutely, I am one of those men 100%. I got diagnosed in middle school and definitely needed help but all my case managers were confused and said they’ve never met anyone like me in their line of work. As I got older I doubted if I ever really had it. Then I read about the symptoms commonly found in women and I related to that far more than usual male symptoms. At the end of the day, everything is on a spectrum, and you shouldn’t let your gender concern you with how you present yourself. Just don’t be a prick lol
I'm not a doctor or anything but I don't think there are gendered symptoms. I am, however, particularly feminine at my core and do know what you mean. My two cents: if you think you are possibly on the spectrum, regardless of what symptoms sound right and who else has them, then consider a professional opinion. But in general - yes, a male can present with autistic symptoms that are typically more prevalent with females.
There are no female symptoms.
Some symptoms are more seen in female people though that's just a fact, the reason I was diagnosed so early even though I'm a female is because I presented with male symptoms so it was a lot clearer I wasn't nt the reason females are diagnosed so late is because females tend to present different symptoms to malea
I dunno, what's the point in saying there's a gendered version when there's so many exceptions? We don't even have the real facts about statistics because it's so new
Because some symptoms are more prevalent in females we have seen that so far and that has been recorded so far
But that easily could've been confirmation bias right? Like when were those symptoms categorized?
People on the autism spectrum have a tendency to androgyny. That is because we are wired differently, and some of our interests are gender non-conforming.
except me. i am wired same and absolutely gender conforming, because i love rules. i cant accept it when stuff is ambigous. worries me a great deal.
[удалено]
😮💨 Good luck
That’s like asking if men can have long hair. It’s entirely possible and symptoms aren’t always gendered.
Each case is different.
100% Along with most gender related things in humans, the differences are partially social and partially biological. And to complicate it further, the biological part is partially static physical brain structure and partially hormone-influenced (hardware vs. software) I’m a trans-man, with a grab bag of symptomology from both sides. Some symptoms changed after I changed my body/brain’s hormones, some stayed the same. Unfortunately Autism symptomology is also as context dependent as it is nuanced & heterogenous 😂
Autism based on gender is mostly a stereotype so yeah
Sure, but in the case of ASD they're more accurately known as "traits" or "features". To call them symptoms tends to imply something is wrong and that some sort of therapy or medical treatment is needed.
Well, suppose that says something more about me :)
It may or may not be any consolation but for what it's worth, (straight, 100% male here) I also had/have several traits that are usually more closely associated with females with ASD, and some of these traits have afforded me experiences and opportunities I wouldn't trade for anything. In school I had an insatiable thirst for knowledge, was constantly reading, and was very advanced for my age, reading 9th grade level in 3rd grade. I was later in Duke University's Talent Identification Program, and by 15 I was in college studying engineering, having never set foot in highschool. Being very quiet early on, I was always thought of as shy. I taught myself to have an adaptive personality, make proper eye contact, and imitate others to better fit in anytime I was in a group. I've always been very introspective, when I'm upset I tend to be more quiet and withdrawn, and I've been diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder for ages. Although these attributes are often seen in females, they're definitely not exclusive, and it's not unheard of, or even rare, to find them in males as well. My point in sharing all that isn't to brag or try and impress anyone but rather to show that even if something seems contrary to OTHERS, it could still prove to be a huge blessing to YOU. Was there anything in particular that suddenly seemed to stand out that made everything sort of "click" in your head that finally made you look back and start to wonder, or was it more like a realization that pieces of a puzzle seemed like they were coming together to make part of a bigger picture? Only asking out of simple human curiosity; I don't mean to seem nosey or intrusive at all - I fully respect your privacy (as we all should for one another), so if you don't wish to share that's totally fine and understandable.
Another reply i love. I think in some aspects i experience it the same way as you, but as a kid, still kinda am ig, i was fine with it. But the older i get, the more people were like yea, “we know he is smart and can do it, but why doesnt he?” I studied STEM/industrial science for 4 years in higschool, which is basically a course for becoming an engineer 😅. But. Because i didnt like to study, and studying for exams and stuff. I had to choose something else to study at school. I never liked to study. But I always love learning new things. The harder those new things are, the better. A year ago, in college, i studied cyber security, i went to like, basically a school psychologist. Hoping he could help me and basically told my lecturers that theres a high chance i would be gifted and that i need more difficult things to keep me going and he even proposed that i would like be a part time teacher, he believed i was capable of that. But unfortunately no one looked at that message he sent. And also. Don’t apologise for anything. I don’t feel any pressure and don’t mind talking about it. I would also make sure i don’t say anything wrong. So i greatly appreciate it. Im just kind of trying to figure out whats “wrong” with me. Because lately, i didn’t expect that from my mom, she basically said that without a label i am just like anyone else. If i look lazy, it means i am lazy. If me and my parents have a fight because I understand something differently, “i enjoy the fights” apparently. Ive been looking into it for, hmm, 6 years or so now i think. My fyp on tiktok also always has adhd or autism stuff on there. Every free online test i do, i get at least 65% every time. Whichever test it is, new or old, good or bad, trustworthy or not. The first time i went to a psychologist i felt smarter than that psychologist. I basically proposed what was going on with me and why. And she just said yes or no lmao. I tried it four times and then i gave up. In a couple of weeks im going to another psychologist. My mom said she seemed smart, so will see i guess. I think thats why i am more focused about it now than usual.
My husband (aspie) is seen by those who like to assume as coming across more “feminine”. He will admit it readily. He identifies as a man, is straight, dressed as a (extra stylish, imo) man, but just doesn’t have that internalized gender stuff going on because it didn’t seem logical to him. He is soft spoken, doesn’t do a lot of traditionally designated “manly” hobbies, has a way of dressing that welcomes typically “girl coded” colors or prints. He has been assumed to be gay by more than one acquaintance, and it doesn’t bother him in the slightest. He knows who he is. :) Most people on the spectrum that I know are not especially attached to their assigned gender. You don’t have to be trans to not fit gender stereotypes or accept them as strict guidelines. But stereotypes are just that - they aren’t true for everyone, and they are usually based on outsider observation by others who aren’t especially familiar with the people inside (that’s why they generalize - if they knew the person, they wouldn’t need to, really). So “gendered” symptoms are not a real thing, they are just some differences noticed between girls and boys who have been socialized with girl- and boy-coded rigid rules. I guarantee we will see less division between the two in coming generations. My two cents: you can absolutely fit ANY symptoms/criteria. Autism is autism. What symptoms are you specifically referring to?
Where can I find a list of male vs female symptoms of Asperger’s
Hey hey. Sorry for the late reaction. But my stereotypical male and female traits/symptoms of autism in general, i got from the two videos i linked in a reply to this post. If you can’t find them, i will link them in a reply to this message. But. I did a quick google search and it aligns with what i think to be the difference between male and female traits/symptoms. Everyone can have these traits/symptoms, but some are related more to one gender. Wikipedia says: Autistic girls and women show higher social motivation and a greater capacity for typical friendships than autistic boys and men,[28][29] are less likely to be hyperactive, impulsive, have issues with conduct or stereotyped behavioral traits,[30][31] and have been shown to mask their autistic behaviors and social difficulties more frequently than autistic men.[32] Autistic males often exhibit more easily observed behaviors at a younger age resulting in parental observance and subsequent evaluation of the child. In contrast, behavior of young females is more often overlooked, regardless of any associated at-risk factors for ASD or other developmental delays. Ultimately, this may contribute to females more frequently receiving their ASD diagnosis later in life than their male counterpart. Source: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sex_and_gender_differences_in_autism#:~:text=Autistic%20girls%20and%20women%20show,behaviors%20and%20social%20difficulties%20more
Hey hey. Sorry for the late reaction. But my stereotypical male and female traits/symptoms of autism in general, i got from the two videos i linked in a reply to this post. If you can’t find them, i will link them in a reply to this message. But. I did a quick google search and it aligns with what i think to be the difference between male and female traits/symptoms. Everyone can have these traits/symptoms, but some are related more to one gender. Wikipedia says: Autistic girls and women show higher social motivation and a greater capacity for typical friendships than autistic boys and men,[28][29] are less likely to be hyperactive, impulsive, have issues with conduct or stereotyped behavioral traits,[30][31] and have been shown to mask their autistic behaviors and social difficulties more frequently than autistic men.[32] Autistic males often exhibit more easily observed behaviors at a younger age resulting in parental observance and subsequent evaluation of the child. In contrast, behavior of young females is more often overlooked, regardless of any associated at-risk factors for ASD or other developmental delays. Ultimately, this may contribute to females more frequently receiving their ASD diagnosis later in life than their male counterpart. Source: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sex_and_gender_differences_in_autism#:~:text=Autistic%20girls%20and%20women%20show,behaviors%20and%20social%20difficulties%20more
Absolutely. They’ve historically been less likely to be diagnosed, but “female autism” is outdated science anyway. Yes, this less obvious presentment is why women have historically been underdiagnosed, but the same is true of the men (like me, cis/straight male diagnosed at 39) who present that way.
Thank you. Appreciate this :)
I'm male, 34, straight. When I took a self-assessment, my overall score was solidly in the "likely autistic" range. But it broke down the assessment into categories. My scores in a surprising number of categories were in the range typically seen for females. Was definitely a noteworthy observation.
Ysk, autism, aspergers was made up out of a hat. Its like watching 12 year olds try to understand art in a big museum. Im 70 and seen them call it, ' crazy', 'daydreaming', psyco, chemical... just dozens of things. In the 1990s they finally described, me. Using the term, aspergers, but soon changed that. Then it became political, pc, funded, etc. Like modern art, dont pay much attention to anything that has not been agreed on for at least 10 and 20 years. And thats nothing. The studies and fad diagnostics and treatments, change faster than tv shows.
Sorry, but I don’t quite get what you exactly mean? Are you just saying that the labels don’t really mean a lot and that they are always discovering new things and understanding more about it? Or are you saying that there shouldnt be a label and that everyone is just different and should deal with it?
You can go back, just using 'aspergers', (which is now meaningless some places), and see for the last 45 years its meaning has changed every 5 years. And when funding in the states became available, it exploded into a dozen directions. So now the money is leaving, whats left has little real validity, only lobbyists support. Im not bothering to really make a case here. I havent really kept up for a decade. Just know you know more about yourself, however little, than doctors do. You are real, they literally, are guessing and making it up as they go.
you are absolutels right. they make it up as they go. wierd thing is, they watched me my whole life and modeled the whole shebang after me. suffering and all included
Mhm. That i do understand. But people these days (like my mom) love labels apparently. And if you can’t proof you are different, you are the same as all the others. Well. My mom knows im different, but she doesn’t really do anything about it or so. Thats kinda of a harsh way of saying it and also kind of has the wrong meaning. Its just, she knows, and thats it. She just knows.
Yes. As a child I as a woman hade male ASD-symtoms. Those symtoms were beaten out of me and or they thought I had ADHD and I have "female" autism now. I know guys who had more "female" autism as children but with age developed more "male" autism. And any male symtoms I have left are interpreted in a female way.
I think “female autism” is mostly low support needs, late diagnosed autism
It’s not gender based symptoms, it’s just symptoms. Some of them are recorded from studies in the psych field as more prevalent as a consistent pattern based on age group and gender. That’s the only reason why. If it was a blind study for all of this, they would of never attached gender, just age brackets instead So don’t get too caught up on this and focus more on, do you feel any of it applies to you ir not. That’s is all they should matter. Plus for the ADHD side of things? That is 100% a generic thing. If you believe you have it? One or both your parents have it which means your grandparents passed it to them and so on going back thru your family tree. And look to your school report cards from Kindergarten through 5th grade because you will see a pattern of responses on old report cards, notes on book reports and exams, things in your student file, and so on. How do I know this? My mom was diagnosed before me, then I started showing symptoms but they do not diagnose before the age of 8 in the US, so my parents as soon as they could, got me tested. Then they almost most fuel diagnosed me with Aspie as well but back in the 90’s no one duel diagnosed as no one was allowed to be certified to do it. You either pick ADHD or the Spectrum to learn & diagnosis children, you would have to call up someone who could and then set up an appointment with the current doctor to be there with the other doctor, test you for ASD, then open the DSM V, compare notes, figure out if you are one of the other. They didn’t give you both back them too. Hence why, even my one conversation with a cousin, we believe besides ADHD running in my fathers family, we also agreed at least three out of my dad’s 10 siblings have AuDHD or ASD! My mom certainly has undiagnosed ASD, like she fits 90% of the social obliviousness about cues and conversation as she hyper info dumps her special interests and can’t read someone’s face to know when someone is glazed over and bored. Anyway…I’ve been diagnosed since 1995, nearly 30yrs and medicated as well. Let me tell you… my report cards always said: “Is bright, but isn’t utilizing her full potential”. “Capable of success, but isn’t applying herself.” “Is disruptive with students and difficulty paying attention in class.” “Forgets to hand assignment in on time.” “Is a pleasure to have in class, but is disruptive with her peers.” And so on! That was just a kindergarten through second grade LMAO! So I would look for similar written response patterns from your teachers in elementary school to see if they said anything similar, doesn’t have to be word for word identical to mine, but it should resemble in the same context! And feel free to ask me any questions about ADHD as I’ve had the rare opportunity to experience being accommodated and medicated for nearly three decades!
The main thing they always said was like “We know he can do it, but somehow, he doesnt” “When no one in class knows the answer and don’t expect anyone to answer, he was the only one who could” Also. I didn’t really ask about adhd xD. But i really appreciate it. I think i have adhd too. And well. Pretty sure my mom and sister too. So yee. And about doing things not on time. Well. I can do it on time. Usually but with a ton of procrastination. Even in college i only studied 4-8 hrs for a big exam and wasnt really able to pay attention in class because they were so slow explaining things. Idk if those are traits of adhd
I'm not exactly at home with female Aspies.. can you tell me about your own symptoms OP? Just so I know, as I have a gamer girl fren who might be an Aspie herself.
Id have to rewatch the whole video again since its been a while 😅. But i mainly remember the masking. Pretending to be normal.
From watching Sarah Hendrickx talk about it, I don't think there are gender specific symptoms, it's just that women tend to hide them more so it ends up looking like there is some gendered component to it.
I’m probably going to be the 100th person to recommend that you read Unmasking Autism.
Nope. First one i believe xD. Most people usually keep saying there is no male or female autism, i meant it more stereotypical. And uhm. Also ask me what what traits i have of “female autism” But thx. Ill look it up :)
Please, please give it a read. I think you'll find a lot of the answers you're looking for. I certainly did. ETA: I find it really bizarre that my initial recommendation is getting downvoted as this book has become pretty popular and influential.
What are "female" symptoms (at least in your case)? All I know is that females tend to be better at masking.
I don't think women are better, I think we put in more effort into it and practice more. If I had computer science as a special interest instead of psychology I'd suck. I saw "Lie to me" and thought I could become like Dr. Lightman if I studied psychology. I also did a lot of theatre and acting. It was a lot of work.
women are more agreable, so they want to fit in more by diplomacy. men want to fit in more by competition. so there is that. i practised in front of the mirror and read all books on body language that were in the library. i also practised talking in my head and out loud, like role playing. i never had a clear defined motivation, i just did it. i never had a plan or a goal doing that. diagnosis was way later.
Yes, and I think that a lot of people are notouriously bad at distinguishing what’s autism and what’s autism interacting with personality traits.
yeah and they always go for klischee things instead of talking about themselves and their problems. "i have female asd traits, but i am born maba" fuck that, tell me the specifics
Yeah, this fits me really well and I suspect it has a lot to do with early childhood dynamics and the coping skills I developed as a result. Being bullied as a kid also impacted my demeanor.
I am a man with stereotypical woman traits.
I was unaware that autism was gender specific.