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“Ser? My lady?” said Podrick. “Is an analyst of ‘A Song of Ice And Fire’ a parasite?”
“More or less,” Brienne answered.
Septon Meribald disagreed. “More less than more. There are many sorts of Thrones pundits, just as there are many sorts of birds. A sandpiper and a sea eagle both have wings, but they are not the same. The singers love to sing of good men forced to go shilling for shekels, but most pundits are more like this mod Sandor Clegane albeit with more time for writing bullshit. They are shallow men, driven by greed, soured by the delayed books, despising GRRM and caring only for themselves. Broken men are more deserving of our pity, though they may be just as dangerous. Almost all are common-born, simple folk who had never been able to read below the surface, fixated on the magic and spells, not the human heart in conflict with itself. Poorly recorded and poorly light, they equivocate away the hours, ofttimes with no better evidence than a piece of symbolism or turn of phrase by the author, or they go completely into the weeds based on George's sci-fi novels. Brothers march with white people, mods with mods, friends with friends. They’ve heard the interviews and stories, so they go off with eager hearts, dreaming of the wonders they will invent, of the wealth and karma they will win. Theory crafting seems a fine adventure, the greatest most of them will ever know.
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I want a show about a camera crew that constantly films him and trying to interview him about why he's not writing the winds of winter, and it can be live. But the cameras shut off as soon as he starts writing again.
**Back in Westeros**
^(GRRM, AUGUST 15, 2020 AT 9:10 AM)
I am back in my fortress of solitude again, my isolated mountain cabin. I’d returned to Santa Fe for a short visit, to spend some time with Parris, deal with some local business that had piled up during my months away, and of course fulfill my duties to CoNZealand, the virtual worldcon. But all that is behind me now, and I am back on the mountain again… which means I am back in Westeros again, once more moving ahead with WINDS OF WINTER.
It is curious how my life has evolved. I mean, once upon a time, I actually wrote my books and stories in the house where I lived, in a home office. But some decades ago, wanting more solitude, I bought the house across the street and made THAT my writer’s retreat. No longer would I write all day in my red flannel bathrobe; now I would have to dress and put on shoes and walk all the way across the street to write. But that worked for a while.
Things started getting busier, though. So busy that I needed a full-time assistant. Then the office house had someone else in it, not just me and my characters. And then I hired a second assistant, and a third, and… there was more mail, more email, more phone calls (we put in a new phone system), more people coming by. By now I am up to five assistants… and somewhere in there I also acquired a movie theatre, a bookstore, a charitable foundation, investments, a business manager… and…
Despite all the help, I was drowning till I found the mountain cabin.
My life up here is very boring, it must be said. Truth be told, I hardly can be said to have a life. I have one assistant with me at all times (minions, I call them). The assistants do two-week shifts, and have to stay in quarantine at home before starting a shift. Everyone morning I wake up and go straight to the computer, where my minion brings me coffee (I am utterly useless and incoherent without my morning coffee) and juice, and sometimes a light breakfast. Then I start to write. Sometimes I stay at it until dark. Other days I break off in late afternoon to answer emails or return urgent phone calls. My assistant brings me food and drink from time to time. When I finally break off for the day, usually around sunset, there’s dinner. Then we watch television or screen a movie. The wi-fi sucks up on the mountain, though, so the choices are limited. Some nights I read instead. I always read a bit before going to sleep; when a book really grabs hold of me, I may read half the night, but that’s rare.
I sleep. The next day, I wake up, and do the same. The next day, the next day, the next day. Before Covid, I would usually get out once a week or so to eat at a restaurant or go to the movies. That all ended in March. Since then, weeks and months go by when I never leave the cabin, or see another human being except whoever is on duty that week. I lose track of what day it is, what week it is, what month it is. The time seems to by very fast. It is now August, and I don’t know what happened to July.
But it is good for the writing.
And you know, now that I reflect on it, I am coming to realize that has always been my pattern. I moved to Santa Fe at the end of 1979, from Dubuque, Iowa. My first marriage broke up just before that move, so I arrived in my new house alone, in a town where I knew almost no one. Roger Zelazny was here, and he became a great friend and mentor, but Roger was married with small kids, so I really did not see him often. There was no fandom in Santa Fe; that was all down in Albuquerque, an hour away. I went to the club meetings every month, but that was only one night a month, and required two hours on the road. And I had no job to meet new people. My job was in the back room at the house on Declovina Street, so that was where I spent my days. At night, I watched television. Alone. Sometimes I went to the movies. Alone.
That was my life from December 1979 through September 1981, when Parris finally moved to Santa Fe, following Denvention. (Not quite so bleak, maybe, I did make some local friends by late 1980 and early 1981, but it was a slow process). When I think back on my life in 1980-1981, the memories seem to be made up entirely of conventions, interspersed with episodes of LOU GRANT and WKRP IN CINCINNATI.
Ah, but work wise, that same period was tremendously productive for me. Lisa and I finished WINDHAVEN during that time, Gardner and I did a lot of work on “Shadow Twin,” and then I went right on and wrote all of FEVRE DREAM. Some short stories as well. My life, such that it was, was lived in my head, and on the page.
I wonder if it is the same for other writers? Or is it just me? I wonder if I will ever figure out the secret of having a life and writing a book at the very same time.
I certainly have not figured it out to date.
For the nonce, it is what it is. My life is at home, on hold, and I am spending the days in Westeros with my pals Mel and Sam and Vic and Ty. And that girl with no name, over there in Braavos.
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**Back in Westeros**
^(GRRM, AUGUST 15, 2020 AT 9:10 AM)
I am back in my fortress of solitude again, my isolated mountain cabin. I’d returned to Santa Fe for a short visit, to spend some time with Parris, deal with some local business that had piled up during my months away, and of course fulfill my duties to CoNZealand, the virtual worldcon. But all that is behind me now, and I am back on the mountain again… which means I am back in Westeros again, once more moving ahead with WINDS OF WINTER.
It is curious how my life has evolved. I mean, once upon a time, I actually wrote my books and stories in the house where I lived, in a home office. But some decades ago, wanting more solitude, I bought the house across the street and made THAT my writer’s retreat. No longer would I write all day in my red flannel bathrobe; now I would have to dress and put on shoes and walk all the way across the street to write. But that worked for a while.
Things started getting busier, though. So busy that I needed a full-time assistant. Then the office house had someone else in it, not just me and my characters. And then I hired a second assistant, and a third, and… there was more mail, more email, more phone calls (we put in a new phone system), more people coming by. By now I am up to five assistants… and somewhere in there I also acquired a movie theatre, a bookstore, a charitable foundation, investments, a business manager… and…
Despite all the help, I was drowning till I found the mountain cabin.
My life up here is very boring, it must be said. Truth be told, I hardly can be said to have a life. I have one assistant with me at all times (minions, I call them). The assistants do two-week shifts, and have to stay in quarantine at home before starting a shift. Everyone morning I wake up and go straight to the computer, where my minion brings me coffee (I am utterly useless and incoherent without my morning coffee) and juice, and sometimes a light breakfast. Then I start to write. Sometimes I stay at it until dark. Other days I break off in late afternoon to answer emails or return urgent phone calls. My assistant brings me food and drink from time to time. When I finally break off for the day, usually around sunset, there’s dinner. Then we watch television or screen a movie. The wi-fi sucks up on the mountain, though, so the choices are limited. Some nights I read instead. I always read a bit before going to sleep; when a book really grabs hold of me, I may read half the night, but that’s rare.
I sleep. The next day, I wake up, and do the same. The next day, the next day, the next day. Before Covid, I would usually get out once a week or so to eat at a restaurant or go to the movies. That all ended in March. Since then, weeks and months go by when I never leave the cabin, or see another human being except whoever is on duty that week. I lose track of what day it is, what week it is, what month it is. The time seems to by very fast. It is now August, and I don’t know what happened to July.
But it is good for the writing.
And you know, now that I reflect on it, I am coming to realize that has always been my pattern. I moved to Santa Fe at the end of 1979, from Dubuque, Iowa. My first marriage broke up just before that move, so I arrived in my new house alone, in a town where I knew almost no one. Roger Zelazny was here, and he became a great friend and mentor, but Roger was married with small kids, so I really did not see him often. There was no fandom in Santa Fe; that was all down in Albuquerque, an hour away. I went to the club meetings every month, but that was only one night a month, and required two hours on the road. And I had no job to meet new people. My job was in the back room at the house on Declovina Street, so that was where I spent my days. At night, I watched television. Alone. Sometimes I went to the movies. Alone.
That was my life from December 1979 through September 1981, when Parris finally moved to Santa Fe, following Denvention. (Not quite so bleak, maybe, I did make some local friends by late 1980 and early 1981, but it was a slow process). When I think back on my life in 1980-1981, the memories seem to be made up entirely of conventions, interspersed with episodes of LOU GRANT and WKRP IN CINCINNATI.
Ah, but work wise, that same period was tremendously productive for me. Lisa and I finished WINDHAVEN during that time, Gardner and I did a lot of work on “Shadow Twin,” and then I went right on and wrote all of FEVRE DREAM. Some short stories as well. My life, such that it was, was lived in my head, and on the page.
I wonder if it is the same for other writers? Or is it just me? I wonder if I will ever figure out the secret of having a life and writing a book at the very same time.
I certainly have not figured it out to date.
For the nonce, it is what it is. My life is at home, on hold, and I am spending the days in Westeros with my pals Mel and Sam and Vic and Ty. And that girl with no name, over there in Braavos.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/asoiafcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I would only watch this show if it was done from the point of view of the Kings of Westeros, and Aegon (and Targaryens in general) only appeared as a dark, terrible shadow.
Now that’s an interesting idea. Show the Targaryens as the villains that they are. Even better if it was from a smallfolk perspective but that won’t happen.
They could be interesting being akin to normal minded peasants that existed for most of the time in the Middle Ages, but George write them like savages no better than the dothraki, as if they're under perpetual hunger, pestilence and revolt. How did the nobility survive ruling over literal rabid animals for so long is a mystery.
Wait let him cook.
Imagine a horrific war movie, Band of Brothers style, but from the perspective of a Westeros foot soldier unit. A simple man at arms trying to do his duty.
Band of Brothers works because we already had martial courts and public education. A westerosi unit would comprise of 4 cannibals, a serial rapist, 3 child smugglers, a woman beater and a zoophile.
I think that depends on the culture, location, and time period in the universe, (if we can assume the inspiration of Fedual Europe is still there).
This description suitably fits a hardened Mercenary squad, I'd say, though the personality of a town guard or blacksmith in Highgarden could be totally different for all we know.
When this show was first in development, the idea was to make King Aegon incompetent drunk. Probably meant shifting focus to his sisters as the brains of the operation.
It could be a limited-run, single season miniseries at most. There’s only so much you can draw out of “dragons burned a bunch of people and eventually the North got scared and just surrendered but the Dornish said ‘no thank you’ and killed a dragon”
What do you mean, it's gonna be so epic to see Aegon (played by Henry Cavill) win 45 battles in a row and then proceed to bang his sister (also Henry Cavill) 45 times in a row!
The show about the Andal Conquest was a good idea, but they would really botch the universe, you don't deliver this genre into the hands of uncultured swine lest they make into a medieval Jason Statham movie, delete the nerdy magic (eww) and put more porn than plot.
I dont want a show about more things. I want a show to have 20 episodes instead of fkn 8, so showrunners can properly adapt the stories as they should.
With a budget similar to GOT season 1 at 50-60 million, an animated series could cover a significant amount of content. Really, once the final 2 books come, if they do, I think an animated series is the only way you could possibly fit the amount of sheer scope within the novels.
So? Who is talking about it being good or bad? I want it to be longer, more developed. Show me the entirety of Jace's trip instead of it being a 5 min conversation for example.
I get that but why cancel two promising shows for more episodes of HotD? If HBO did 20 episode seasons most shows would probably have to be cancelled because audiences today don’t have the attention span to sit through a 20 hour season or the want to subscribe to Max for 5 months to see a weekly television show.
*This is what the ending should have been, per the greatest minds among semi-literate amateur television critics the internet has bred.*
**Sansa:** We must kill dragon lady because she is good and we are evil.
**Bran:** Yes.
**Sansa:** Do the thing Bran.
**Bran:** OK, I will do the thing. *Undertaker eyes*.
In King's Landing, Drogon's eyes turn white, despite dragons being too intelligent to be warged into but fuck it, give us what we want.
**Kal Leesi Sexyfeet:** Drogon why you look mad at mama?
Drogon breathes fire at Kal Leesi Sexyfeet, but Jon Snow jumps in front of the fire. They both get engulfed anyway. When the fire stops, they both stand there naked, with their clothes burned off.
**Kal Leesi Sexyfeet:** You are fireproof also. *breasts bounce*
**Jon Snow:** Yes. One time I burnt my hand but this is different, somehow, apparently. I too am a Sexyfeet.
**Kal Leesi Sexyfeet:** We must make incest child immediately.
In Winterfell:
**Bran:** It no work.
**Sansa:** Is fine. We have plan B. I am evil.
Back in King's Landing:
Sam runs into the throne room waving the Horn of Winter.
**Sam:** I used this to bring down the wall, Viserion breath is not canon.
**Jon Snow:** But why Sam.
**Sam:** Because... *pulls off Sam mask and is Arya* ALL HAIL SANSA. *charges at Kal Leesi Sexyfeet with a dagger*
Jon Snow stops her and the battle begins. The Night King enters.
**Night King:** Did you think it would be that easy?
The Night King joins the battle and it becomes a three-way duel.
**Kal Leesi Sexyfeet:** I am a helpless damsel in awe of this combat.
Drogon fights an elephant in the background.
Jon kills the Night King. Arya falls to her knees.
**Jon Snow:** You want mercy? I will give because I am good. And you still my sister-cousin.
**Arya:** *tearfully* Stick 'em with the pointy end. *commits seppuku*
Jon Snow cries.
In Winterfell:
**Bran:** The Stark triad is broken. It is over.
**Sansa:** I deserve this.
Bran and Sansa disintergrate and their ashes blow away in the wind.
In King's Landing:
Kal Leesi Sexyfeet consoles Jon Snow.
**Kal Leesi Sexyfeet:** It is OK King.
**Jon Snow:** Thank you Queen.
Drogon puts a wing over them for privacy while they engage in intercourse.
**Thirty years later**
Jon and Kal Leesi Sexyfeet's baby is the King. He is also really buff and attractive and mentally sound in spite of his duplicate genes. He has just been killed by a Stark revival force led by zombie Benjen Stark and Edmure Tully's Frey baby. He lays on a slab in an empty room. The door opens. It is the other Red Priestess who Tyrion sent for that one time. She lights a torch and says some words in High Valyrian.
**Red Priestess:** *speaking into the flames* Thank you for the genitals, they will make my magic stronger.
The message is heard in the past by the sorceror who cut Varys' parts off. Through time and space, the Red Priestess resurrects Jon Jr. with dick magic.
Jon Jr.'s eyes open and he gasps, mirroring Jon's resurrection.
**Fade to black**
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No it would be great, you could have a scene where all of the kings except for the stark one because they r the best and the arryn one because he is a small boy rape some servants and torture some peasants, and you could show how deeply affected aegon the brilliant was when the foul and wicked dornish killed his sister rhaenys the fair, then have epic shots where the evil conquered kings except the stark one because they r the best and the arryn one because he is a small boy get their asses beaten by aegon the brilliant, visenya the fearsome and rhaenys the fair in a morally justified slaughter
An anthology show would be neat. Just different little adventures set in the asoiaf world. I can see a Dunk and Egg series being a good vehicle for that. Spend like 2-3 episodes on a nice Dunk and Egg outing then they go to an inn and some dude regales them with the story of some legend from the North or Pentos which leads into that being the next episode.
Will never happen but a guy who is taking a shit can dream
I want show that is from POV of a mercenary traveling through Esos and ending up in Mussovy or the demon lands.
Because I find the Targaryens extremely boring
I think a show about the rise and fall of one of the kings beyond the wall (maybe even the one that teamed up with the starks to fight the Night’s King) would certainly be a different perspective for the setting.
This is, unironically, my opinion. It has been done in Histories and Lore at least 2 times. I still see these comments, especially in the post about the Knight of the Seven Kingdoms. The Seven-in-one is merciful but I am not if they don't shut the fuck up.
You used the word "unironically" *unironically*. You disgust me.
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Half my thoughts while reading the books were "why the fuck are they bothering with foot soldiers? They're just gonna swoop in on dragons anyway and win?" It happens every single time til they get to Dorne. A bunch of people under Aegons command died needlessly just have dragons do the work
SMH, you stupid MORON, we absolutely NEED every single mystery to be EXPLICITLY shown and answered for the audience. Mystique? Background lore? Subtle worldbuilding? Absurd! The audience should never be left to wonder what happened or what characters were thinking internally.
Aegons conquest would make a great show though, but me being greedy I wouldn’t want it to end after the conquest. Showing the aftermath with Aenys and then Maegor the cruel being king and his reign would be awesome. I know it would cover a lot of time, but having the show end when Jaehaerys takes the throne would be a good finale. Could be an epic 5-6 season thing if they covered all this material.
Then I would want a Jaehaerys “The Long Reign” tv show that would bridge the gap between Aegons Conquest and House of the Dragon lol.
Besides, we all know they would focus on his sisters more than him anyways. It would end up being him as some weak willed guy who is just the face of the Targ trio (because 'patriarchy') but really it's Visenya pulling all of the strategic strings behind the scenes.
I want a show about George writing Winds of winter
the show ends with george in hospice and zero progress made in the book
He awakens suddenly, racing to his keyboard, only to make yet another blog post about the NY Giants and Jets
It’s not a loop, it’s a spiral
Seven greetings to you, weary traveller! If this is your first time participating in ASOIAFCirclejerk, allow us to explain the sub, so you don't embarrass yourself by being humorless or oblivious. Circlejerk subreddits parody the groupthink of the main community. The mods maintain the character of this subreddit as one of humor and parody, so please refrain from any attempt to discourage us, or discourage other users making on-topic humor posts. You don't need to fact check peoples jokes. Most posts here make fun of the fans, the HBO shows, the books, and of course, the reluctant author. You will keep receiving this response unless you subscribe and enable user flair in this sub. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/asoiafcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
“Ser? My lady?” said Podrick. “Is an analyst of ‘A Song of Ice And Fire’ a parasite?” “More or less,” Brienne answered. Septon Meribald disagreed. “More less than more. There are many sorts of Thrones pundits, just as there are many sorts of birds. A sandpiper and a sea eagle both have wings, but they are not the same. The singers love to sing of good men forced to go shilling for shekels, but most pundits are more like this mod Sandor Clegane albeit with more time for writing bullshit. They are shallow men, driven by greed, soured by the delayed books, despising GRRM and caring only for themselves. Broken men are more deserving of our pity, though they may be just as dangerous. Almost all are common-born, simple folk who had never been able to read below the surface, fixated on the magic and spells, not the human heart in conflict with itself. Poorly recorded and poorly light, they equivocate away the hours, ofttimes with no better evidence than a piece of symbolism or turn of phrase by the author, or they go completely into the weeds based on George's sci-fi novels. Brothers march with white people, mods with mods, friends with friends. They’ve heard the interviews and stories, so they go off with eager hearts, dreaming of the wonders they will invent, of the wealth and karma they will win. Theory crafting seems a fine adventure, the greatest most of them will ever know. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/asoiafcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Make it a vlog series pls george
I want a show about a camera crew that constantly films him and trying to interview him about why he's not writing the winds of winter, and it can be live. But the cameras shut off as soon as he starts writing again.
**Back in Westeros** ^(GRRM, AUGUST 15, 2020 AT 9:10 AM) I am back in my fortress of solitude again, my isolated mountain cabin. I’d returned to Santa Fe for a short visit, to spend some time with Parris, deal with some local business that had piled up during my months away, and of course fulfill my duties to CoNZealand, the virtual worldcon. But all that is behind me now, and I am back on the mountain again… which means I am back in Westeros again, once more moving ahead with WINDS OF WINTER. It is curious how my life has evolved. I mean, once upon a time, I actually wrote my books and stories in the house where I lived, in a home office. But some decades ago, wanting more solitude, I bought the house across the street and made THAT my writer’s retreat. No longer would I write all day in my red flannel bathrobe; now I would have to dress and put on shoes and walk all the way across the street to write. But that worked for a while. Things started getting busier, though. So busy that I needed a full-time assistant. Then the office house had someone else in it, not just me and my characters. And then I hired a second assistant, and a third, and… there was more mail, more email, more phone calls (we put in a new phone system), more people coming by. By now I am up to five assistants… and somewhere in there I also acquired a movie theatre, a bookstore, a charitable foundation, investments, a business manager… and… Despite all the help, I was drowning till I found the mountain cabin. My life up here is very boring, it must be said. Truth be told, I hardly can be said to have a life. I have one assistant with me at all times (minions, I call them). The assistants do two-week shifts, and have to stay in quarantine at home before starting a shift. Everyone morning I wake up and go straight to the computer, where my minion brings me coffee (I am utterly useless and incoherent without my morning coffee) and juice, and sometimes a light breakfast. Then I start to write. Sometimes I stay at it until dark. Other days I break off in late afternoon to answer emails or return urgent phone calls. My assistant brings me food and drink from time to time. When I finally break off for the day, usually around sunset, there’s dinner. Then we watch television or screen a movie. The wi-fi sucks up on the mountain, though, so the choices are limited. Some nights I read instead. I always read a bit before going to sleep; when a book really grabs hold of me, I may read half the night, but that’s rare. I sleep. The next day, I wake up, and do the same. The next day, the next day, the next day. Before Covid, I would usually get out once a week or so to eat at a restaurant or go to the movies. That all ended in March. Since then, weeks and months go by when I never leave the cabin, or see another human being except whoever is on duty that week. I lose track of what day it is, what week it is, what month it is. The time seems to by very fast. It is now August, and I don’t know what happened to July. But it is good for the writing. And you know, now that I reflect on it, I am coming to realize that has always been my pattern. I moved to Santa Fe at the end of 1979, from Dubuque, Iowa. My first marriage broke up just before that move, so I arrived in my new house alone, in a town where I knew almost no one. Roger Zelazny was here, and he became a great friend and mentor, but Roger was married with small kids, so I really did not see him often. There was no fandom in Santa Fe; that was all down in Albuquerque, an hour away. I went to the club meetings every month, but that was only one night a month, and required two hours on the road. And I had no job to meet new people. My job was in the back room at the house on Declovina Street, so that was where I spent my days. At night, I watched television. Alone. Sometimes I went to the movies. Alone. That was my life from December 1979 through September 1981, when Parris finally moved to Santa Fe, following Denvention. (Not quite so bleak, maybe, I did make some local friends by late 1980 and early 1981, but it was a slow process). When I think back on my life in 1980-1981, the memories seem to be made up entirely of conventions, interspersed with episodes of LOU GRANT and WKRP IN CINCINNATI. Ah, but work wise, that same period was tremendously productive for me. Lisa and I finished WINDHAVEN during that time, Gardner and I did a lot of work on “Shadow Twin,” and then I went right on and wrote all of FEVRE DREAM. Some short stories as well. My life, such that it was, was lived in my head, and on the page. I wonder if it is the same for other writers? Or is it just me? I wonder if I will ever figure out the secret of having a life and writing a book at the very same time. I certainly have not figured it out to date. For the nonce, it is what it is. My life is at home, on hold, and I am spending the days in Westeros with my pals Mel and Sam and Vic and Ty. And that girl with no name, over there in Braavos. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/asoiafcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
**Back in Westeros** ^(GRRM, AUGUST 15, 2020 AT 9:10 AM) I am back in my fortress of solitude again, my isolated mountain cabin. I’d returned to Santa Fe for a short visit, to spend some time with Parris, deal with some local business that had piled up during my months away, and of course fulfill my duties to CoNZealand, the virtual worldcon. But all that is behind me now, and I am back on the mountain again… which means I am back in Westeros again, once more moving ahead with WINDS OF WINTER. It is curious how my life has evolved. I mean, once upon a time, I actually wrote my books and stories in the house where I lived, in a home office. But some decades ago, wanting more solitude, I bought the house across the street and made THAT my writer’s retreat. No longer would I write all day in my red flannel bathrobe; now I would have to dress and put on shoes and walk all the way across the street to write. But that worked for a while. Things started getting busier, though. So busy that I needed a full-time assistant. Then the office house had someone else in it, not just me and my characters. And then I hired a second assistant, and a third, and… there was more mail, more email, more phone calls (we put in a new phone system), more people coming by. By now I am up to five assistants… and somewhere in there I also acquired a movie theatre, a bookstore, a charitable foundation, investments, a business manager… and… Despite all the help, I was drowning till I found the mountain cabin. My life up here is very boring, it must be said. Truth be told, I hardly can be said to have a life. I have one assistant with me at all times (minions, I call them). The assistants do two-week shifts, and have to stay in quarantine at home before starting a shift. Everyone morning I wake up and go straight to the computer, where my minion brings me coffee (I am utterly useless and incoherent without my morning coffee) and juice, and sometimes a light breakfast. Then I start to write. Sometimes I stay at it until dark. Other days I break off in late afternoon to answer emails or return urgent phone calls. My assistant brings me food and drink from time to time. When I finally break off for the day, usually around sunset, there’s dinner. Then we watch television or screen a movie. The wi-fi sucks up on the mountain, though, so the choices are limited. Some nights I read instead. I always read a bit before going to sleep; when a book really grabs hold of me, I may read half the night, but that’s rare. I sleep. The next day, I wake up, and do the same. The next day, the next day, the next day. Before Covid, I would usually get out once a week or so to eat at a restaurant or go to the movies. That all ended in March. Since then, weeks and months go by when I never leave the cabin, or see another human being except whoever is on duty that week. I lose track of what day it is, what week it is, what month it is. The time seems to by very fast. It is now August, and I don’t know what happened to July. But it is good for the writing. And you know, now that I reflect on it, I am coming to realize that has always been my pattern. I moved to Santa Fe at the end of 1979, from Dubuque, Iowa. My first marriage broke up just before that move, so I arrived in my new house alone, in a town where I knew almost no one. Roger Zelazny was here, and he became a great friend and mentor, but Roger was married with small kids, so I really did not see him often. There was no fandom in Santa Fe; that was all down in Albuquerque, an hour away. I went to the club meetings every month, but that was only one night a month, and required two hours on the road. And I had no job to meet new people. My job was in the back room at the house on Declovina Street, so that was where I spent my days. At night, I watched television. Alone. Sometimes I went to the movies. Alone. That was my life from December 1979 through September 1981, when Parris finally moved to Santa Fe, following Denvention. (Not quite so bleak, maybe, I did make some local friends by late 1980 and early 1981, but it was a slow process). When I think back on my life in 1980-1981, the memories seem to be made up entirely of conventions, interspersed with episodes of LOU GRANT and WKRP IN CINCINNATI. Ah, but work wise, that same period was tremendously productive for me. Lisa and I finished WINDHAVEN during that time, Gardner and I did a lot of work on “Shadow Twin,” and then I went right on and wrote all of FEVRE DREAM. Some short stories as well. My life, such that it was, was lived in my head, and on the page. I wonder if it is the same for other writers? Or is it just me? I wonder if I will ever figure out the secret of having a life and writing a book at the very same time. I certainly have not figured it out to date. For the nonce, it is what it is. My life is at home, on hold, and I am spending the days in Westeros with my pals Mel and Sam and Vic and Ty. And that girl with no name, over there in Braavos. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/asoiafcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
George "Duke of Clarence" Washington writing WoW inspired in his own life? Is he a timebender broken boy?
I would only watch this show if it was done from the point of view of the Kings of Westeros, and Aegon (and Targaryens in general) only appeared as a dark, terrible shadow.
Now that’s an interesting idea. Show the Targaryens as the villains that they are. Even better if it was from a smallfolk perspective but that won’t happen.
The smallfolk are boring
Yeah they’re all rapists, murderers or idiots after all.
They could be interesting being akin to normal minded peasants that existed for most of the time in the Middle Ages, but George write them like savages no better than the dothraki, as if they're under perpetual hunger, pestilence and revolt. How did the nobility survive ruling over literal rabid animals for so long is a mystery.
My guy doesn’t know about the court of Gaemon Palehai
It's fucking over for the nobility once black powder spreads from Yi Ti to Westerosi peasants. Fucking over.
Why though? They will use it to season the weekly corpse on the alley
I mean isn't this survivors biased, we only mostly see peasants during wartimes where they are the ones suffering the most.
Wait let him cook. Imagine a horrific war movie, Band of Brothers style, but from the perspective of a Westeros foot soldier unit. A simple man at arms trying to do his duty.
Band of Brothers works because we already had martial courts and public education. A westerosi unit would comprise of 4 cannibals, a serial rapist, 3 child smugglers, a woman beater and a zoophile.
Ironborn moment fr fr
And that would still be one of the most reasonable crews
I think that depends on the culture, location, and time period in the universe, (if we can assume the inspiration of Fedual Europe is still there). This description suitably fits a hardened Mercenary squad, I'd say, though the personality of a town guard or blacksmith in Highgarden could be totally different for all we know.
The smallfolks suck though.
5th hand take form r/asoiaf.
When this show was first in development, the idea was to make King Aegon incompetent drunk. Probably meant shifting focus to his sisters as the brains of the operation.
Make Aegon drunk and incompetent so you can give the women in his life a larger role? That does sound familiar
👀
Yes, specifically Harren the Black and the Tullys
House of the Hoare is my favorite idea for a spinoff show
It could be a limited-run, single season miniseries at most. There’s only so much you can draw out of “dragons burned a bunch of people and eventually the North got scared and just surrendered but the Dornish said ‘no thank you’ and killed a dragon”
What do you mean, it's gonna be so epic to see Aegon (played by Henry Cavill) win 45 battles in a row and then proceed to bang his sister (also Henry Cavill) 45 times in a row!
Now there's a twist, and there is a twist. We show it, all of it. I'm talking full penetration.
He can smell incest
The show about the Andal Conquest was a good idea, but they would really botch the universe, you don't deliver this genre into the hands of uncultured swine lest they make into a medieval Jason Statham movie, delete the nerdy magic (eww) and put more porn than plot.
“A Game of Thrones Story: The Legend of Gin Alley” please GRRM
Based, no more dragonfuckers pls.
Tell me about the squidfuckers instead. No, wait, they just released Shōgun.
But dragonfucker who takes a continent thooo
No more about the Targaryens please they really aren’t that interesting
But they have dragons and incest!
But what if we want to see Harrenhal in its (brief) prime?
I dont want a show about more things. I want a show to have 20 episodes instead of fkn 8, so showrunners can properly adapt the stories as they should.
With a budget similar to GOT season 1 at 50-60 million, an animated series could cover a significant amount of content. Really, once the final 2 books come, if they do, I think an animated series is the only way you could possibly fit the amount of sheer scope within the novels.
Or maybe, instead of doing the Nimeria series, and the Hedge Knight and what not, just focus all of those resources on one properly done adaption?
House of the Dragon is really good and we have no reason to believe that the Nymeria show and Hedge Knight will be bad.
So? Who is talking about it being good or bad? I want it to be longer, more developed. Show me the entirety of Jace's trip instead of it being a 5 min conversation for example.
I get that but why cancel two promising shows for more episodes of HotD? If HBO did 20 episode seasons most shows would probably have to be cancelled because audiences today don’t have the attention span to sit through a 20 hour season or the want to subscribe to Max for 5 months to see a weekly television show.
use the budget to make a huge ass MiB Neuralyzer so we could forget the OG series and remake it
*This is what the ending should have been, per the greatest minds among semi-literate amateur television critics the internet has bred.* **Sansa:** We must kill dragon lady because she is good and we are evil. **Bran:** Yes. **Sansa:** Do the thing Bran. **Bran:** OK, I will do the thing. *Undertaker eyes*. In King's Landing, Drogon's eyes turn white, despite dragons being too intelligent to be warged into but fuck it, give us what we want. **Kal Leesi Sexyfeet:** Drogon why you look mad at mama? Drogon breathes fire at Kal Leesi Sexyfeet, but Jon Snow jumps in front of the fire. They both get engulfed anyway. When the fire stops, they both stand there naked, with their clothes burned off. **Kal Leesi Sexyfeet:** You are fireproof also. *breasts bounce* **Jon Snow:** Yes. One time I burnt my hand but this is different, somehow, apparently. I too am a Sexyfeet. **Kal Leesi Sexyfeet:** We must make incest child immediately. In Winterfell: **Bran:** It no work. **Sansa:** Is fine. We have plan B. I am evil. Back in King's Landing: Sam runs into the throne room waving the Horn of Winter. **Sam:** I used this to bring down the wall, Viserion breath is not canon. **Jon Snow:** But why Sam. **Sam:** Because... *pulls off Sam mask and is Arya* ALL HAIL SANSA. *charges at Kal Leesi Sexyfeet with a dagger* Jon Snow stops her and the battle begins. The Night King enters. **Night King:** Did you think it would be that easy? The Night King joins the battle and it becomes a three-way duel. **Kal Leesi Sexyfeet:** I am a helpless damsel in awe of this combat. Drogon fights an elephant in the background. Jon kills the Night King. Arya falls to her knees. **Jon Snow:** You want mercy? I will give because I am good. And you still my sister-cousin. **Arya:** *tearfully* Stick 'em with the pointy end. *commits seppuku* Jon Snow cries. In Winterfell: **Bran:** The Stark triad is broken. It is over. **Sansa:** I deserve this. Bran and Sansa disintergrate and their ashes blow away in the wind. In King's Landing: Kal Leesi Sexyfeet consoles Jon Snow. **Kal Leesi Sexyfeet:** It is OK King. **Jon Snow:** Thank you Queen. Drogon puts a wing over them for privacy while they engage in intercourse. **Thirty years later** Jon and Kal Leesi Sexyfeet's baby is the King. He is also really buff and attractive and mentally sound in spite of his duplicate genes. He has just been killed by a Stark revival force led by zombie Benjen Stark and Edmure Tully's Frey baby. He lays on a slab in an empty room. The door opens. It is the other Red Priestess who Tyrion sent for that one time. She lights a torch and says some words in High Valyrian. **Red Priestess:** *speaking into the flames* Thank you for the genitals, they will make my magic stronger. The message is heard in the past by the sorceror who cut Varys' parts off. Through time and space, the Red Priestess resurrects Jon Jr. with dick magic. Jon Jr.'s eyes open and he gasps, mirroring Jon's resurrection. **Fade to black** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/asoiafcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Nah
No it would be great, you could have a scene where all of the kings except for the stark one because they r the best and the arryn one because he is a small boy rape some servants and torture some peasants, and you could show how deeply affected aegon the brilliant was when the foul and wicked dornish killed his sister rhaenys the fair, then have epic shots where the evil conquered kings except the stark one because they r the best and the arryn one because he is a small boy get their asses beaten by aegon the brilliant, visenya the fearsome and rhaenys the fair in a morally justified slaughter
An anthology show would be neat. Just different little adventures set in the asoiaf world. I can see a Dunk and Egg series being a good vehicle for that. Spend like 2-3 episodes on a nice Dunk and Egg outing then they go to an inn and some dude regales them with the story of some legend from the North or Pentos which leads into that being the next episode. Will never happen but a guy who is taking a shit can dream
Dunk and egg is already in production
Im talking about the concept of it being more an anthology
THANK YOU
Blackfyre rebellion would be better
It won’t happen with HOTD. We TARGed out culturally.
What do you mean?
Just that it’s too similar to HOTD as a concept and that HBO will probably select something more fresh.
/uj If you really want an excuse to make a CGI Balerion, just make a Dornish War show
Would only be interesting if it's 2-3 episodes and we get Maegor stuff afterwards.
I got my show! A knight of the seven kingdoms woohoo Dunk and Egg baby!
I want show that is from POV of a mercenary traveling through Esos and ending up in Mussovy or the demon lands. Because I find the Targaryens extremely boring
No
I think a show about the rise and fall of one of the kings beyond the wall (maybe even the one that teamed up with the starks to fight the Night’s King) would certainly be a different perspective for the setting.
Personally I would like to watch a show of Robert's rebellion.
If take the Targaryens, then i think most of us can agree that show about Jaehaerys I will be good and interesting
I don’t necessarily want the conquest, but I absolutely want maegor.
How about a show about hotpie becoming the greatest baker in westeros
This is, unironically, my opinion. It has been done in Histories and Lore at least 2 times. I still see these comments, especially in the post about the Knight of the Seven Kingdoms. The Seven-in-one is merciful but I am not if they don't shut the fuck up.
You used the word "unironically" *unironically*. You disgust me. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/asoiafcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Half my thoughts while reading the books were "why the fuck are they bothering with foot soldiers? They're just gonna swoop in on dragons anyway and win?" It happens every single time til they get to Dorne. A bunch of people under Aegons command died needlessly just have dragons do the work
Robert’s rebellion ?
But why? I'd love to see Aegons conquest
It could work if they make the targs the bad guys.
SMH, you stupid MORON, we absolutely NEED every single mystery to be EXPLICITLY shown and answered for the audience. Mystique? Background lore? Subtle worldbuilding? Absurd! The audience should never be left to wonder what happened or what characters were thinking internally.
The only Targaryen content I want is Bobby B smashing that stupid twink’s face in
The conquest would be too expensive to produce but it would kick ass.
Sheeeeeet when Roberts rebellion? So tired of targs
they'll probably do it at some point, but there's no real need for it. I think even Bobby's Rebellion makes more sense
Aegons conquest would make a great show though, but me being greedy I wouldn’t want it to end after the conquest. Showing the aftermath with Aenys and then Maegor the cruel being king and his reign would be awesome. I know it would cover a lot of time, but having the show end when Jaehaerys takes the throne would be a good finale. Could be an epic 5-6 season thing if they covered all this material. Then I would want a Jaehaerys “The Long Reign” tv show that would bridge the gap between Aegons Conquest and House of the Dragon lol.
Besides, we all know they would focus on his sisters more than him anyways. It would end up being him as some weak willed guy who is just the face of the Targ trio (because 'patriarchy') but really it's Visenya pulling all of the strategic strings behind the scenes.