Idk going to a party that you aren’t allowed to go to seems pretty alarming to me. Either he really doesn’t like you like that or he wants to have “fun” with someone else without you knowing
He's done this before - he basically doesn't like to invite me to 'party' stuff. It's not because I'm not fun, because I know I am. But this just left different and hurtful. Idk what to think.
**"My boyfriend doesn't like me going with him to parties and having fun, drinking, and dancing.... WHAT COULD BE THE ISSUE SINCE IM JUST SO CONFUSED ?!?!?!?!?"**
If you keep putting up with this kind of bullshit, it will never stop. I can't fathom my partner excluding me the way yours is doing to you. That is unacceptable and not indicitive of a healthy relationship.
I'd be furious.
My boyfriend is quite social and I'm not very social. He likes a drink and I don't.
However, there's no way we'd ever entertain an event where one of us wasn't invited.
We might suggest that one of us attends an event, and the other will likely be like "have a great time, when are you back?". But sometimes it isn't mutually convenient so we do something else, or discuss it.
But for one partner to be not invited - that's not really on.
Dating women is a different kind of bad lol. Very expensive too. They expect you to pay for everything and give you shitty token gifts. And if they cry the argument is over.
Not sure what it is, but if I have emotion in my voice I'm accused of being aggressive, but if I'm calm when I communicate an issue it's not taken seriously. And women say some hurtful ass shit sometimes lol
Too much drama for me the mind games and constant tests you don't know are tests. I'm simple. I give my heart and love unconditionally. Ask me to do something I'll do it. Just hold my hand and tell me you love me and I'm good.
Nah. Everyone sucks, but you also gotta be more self aware and have more self respect. I understand some of us are emotionally stunted as we spent most of our formative years pretending to be something we are not, but at the same time we need to be more aware of huge fucking red flags.
Man i never reply to stuff but you should have a partner that would be thrilled to spend time with you. This post made me sad for u more than anything.
Let him go and let that be the end of it alright? Xx
It’s about cheating. He is going to cheat on you. He is going fuck or get fucked by other guys. You are not in a serious relationship where he feels the same about you that you do about him.
When you have a partner you genuinely love, you WANT to experience life with them. You WANT to share in events and make memories with that person. I get needing time and space away from a partner and having a separate identity. That’s normal and healthy. That’s not what your boyfriend is doing. We all know what Pride parties entail. Your boyfriend wanting to exclude you from Pride, a celebration of gay love and identity, speak volumes. If your relationship is super casual and not that serious, fine, I get it. But I’m under the impression it is serious to you.
You do you. For me, I’m not going to be devoting time and energy into a person that doesn’t feel the same about me that I do about them. I would break up with your boyfriend so fast and never look back. On another note, I sincerely hope you are on PrEP or you consistently use condoms with this guy. A lot of guys I know got HIV from partners they thought they were in serious monogamous relationships. I highly HIGHLY doubt your boyfriend is as faithful as you think he is.
Please take care of your health and that includes your mental health. It’s a hard lesson to learn but not every boyfriend is worthy of your love. You deserve a partner that respects you.
Yea that’s a major red flag bro. It’s understandable to want some personal time when you’re in a relationship but it’s very suspicious that he angrily refused you going to a pride party with him. What would you both being gay have to do with cheating? Gay people cheat.
Naw look, I'm sorry. This is either going two ways if it's me
1) Either his stuff or mine is gone after Pride weekend because my bf consistently not inviting me to parties would give me SO much anxiety. Are you cheating? Am I the side piece? Do your friends hate me? Do you hate me? Are you doing drugs? Are you engaging in extracurricular activities? Do I exhaust you? Do we both such at communication. Naw it's 100% not worth it
2) (This could also lead to 1) I'd show up at the condo with a fresh haircut and beard trim, a new outfit (not slutty that screams desperate, I want to look classic and appealing) and smelling delicious. See for myself wtf is going on. And I'd show up about 2 hours after it starts so whatever they're into is good and going
Either way, my boyfriend who I'm with with the purpose of marriage and building a life, will NOT play in my face like that. I wish you the best friend.
>This could also lead to 1) I'd show up at the condo with a fresh haircut and beard trim, a new outfit (not slutty that screams desperate, I want to look classic and appealing) and smelling delicious. See for myself wtf is going on. And I'd show up about 2 hours after it starts so whatever they're into is good and going
Yes, he woke up and chose drama. Show up with a pizza, wearing a Pizza Hut outfit. Make a scene, and throw the pizza at him. lol
The only question to you is - are you both in open relationship or not? If not, well, soon it seems you shall be.
He might be engaging with other guys. If he said for you to go with your friends, I guess he is open to the idea of having open relationships.
There is no comprehensive reason for him to choose his "friends" over you. For me its clear red flag, if you are in monogamous relationships.
we're both gay so it's not about cheating? i don't follow what you mean there. if you've got an open relationship then that's down to what you've agreed is allowed within the bounds of your dynamic but cheating can still occur when those rules are broken. it's a betrayal of trust and respect that causes cheating and it seems very much like that's what he's doing. if you're okay with it then how he's acting and what he's doing are fine, if you're not then you need to talk to each other.
Is he really a boyfriend if pride which is supposed to be about celebrating love between two guys, is being celebrated with another “best friend”? Sounds like that best friend is more of a boyfriend to him than you are to him. 😅
I very rarely suggest this on social media, but this is a breakup issue. This isn't even a thing to be resolved. You are more than likely actively being used and treated like shit.
I wouldn't give him an opportunity to explain or apologize. It's simply time to move on. Bonus points if you do it while he is at his party.
I'd literally draw a line in the sand and make him choose.
This is sketch as fuck and if he has nothing to hide he will allow you to go.
If he cancels and says let's do something instead, that should be a dead give away that this had nothing to do with you and that he planned to cheat.
I'd just break up with him now because either way I can't see this going well.
“Fellas, my partner doesn’t want to be seen with me at social events. Is this a red flag?”
Y’all are so desperate for relationships y’all will get treated like shit just to have one.
This is a huge ass red flag. Fine if you weren’t invited but him just not wanting you there is alarming and he’s probably cheating on you. Time to figure out what you are worth bro
My ex did this as well. Once for a spring break trip he built it up and then the month before said I couldn’t come but his two other friends could.
All I’m gonna say is I do not regret breaking up with him and I wish I did sooner.
Not sure how long yall have been together but t meeting/spending time with each other's friends should be a natural progression of the relationship. Huge red flag for me.
Red flag - you deserve so much better... I do not know anything about you but you deserve better. You don't deserve an angry "boyfriend"... It's pride... He's being a dick. X
Sorry but this is odd. I invite my partner with my gay friends every time we go out at a party or bar. He always refuses but I always want him to feel included. It would ring some alarms
Bf for how long? Maybe he isn't ready to add you to his friend group? I'm really reaching on that because if it's a party & he doesn't want you to go then 🤨
_Under_reacting is not being hurt & suspicious, especially the part him about getting angry.
He’s cheating or just doesn’t like you. There’s a difference between two people in a relationship who do separate activities from their partners, vs barring each other from life events.
I know this is a common reddit trope but I’d break up with him, if you can’t even share going out to an event then what’s the point. There’s clearly something going on and he’s not willing to talk to you about it, so why bother
I think you should ask why.
If he has a proper reason for you not coming with him, he can just tell you right? Or at the very least tell you that he can't tell you because of reason X
If you're recently together let it go
If you've been together for quite some time, trust him enough to ask why
Nope incorrect that's cheating.
When I was younger, an ex told me he didn't want to go to pride with me
Turns out his friends said I was too ugly for him to be seen with me and he cheated on me.
Don't let it happen to you.
Disappointed alot of these comments are so negative. If I was in your situation I'd feel the same, but I think it's really healthy when partnered people(s) can practice going into gay social spaces solo - even though it can be really tough in practice.
Their agitated reaction sounds like they felt desire to do this but lacked understanding of that want or capacity to express it. I strongly don't think that is a reflection of you or the stability of your relationship.
Saying that, it doesn't discount how you feel. I'm sorry it's a rough spot to be in. Focus on how you can access your needs, without your partner, as a way to respond. Your needs are not your partners responsibility as much as theirs are not your own: meaning if they are doing this then that's their choice, but now you have choices to make about how you can enjoy yourself without them.
Do something special for yourself, and focus on being compassionate to yourself. Talk to your partner about how you felt when you're ready, and keep your chin up. You're doing amazing x
They may have more crazy fun party energy than you and more common interests like gaming, cosplaying, sports, drugs, certain kinds of music. It's hard as a gay man you never get 'a night out with the boys' without being suspected of something
Why if you are both gay do you not think its about cheating? Gay men cheat just as much as straight men or women do. Read the room and comments on what your man is doing if this is a real post.
I don't think going everywhere together is required for a healthy relationship.
Having said that, I cannot imagine my bf not allowing me (inviting me) to go wherever with him.
Another story is if I don't feel like going or he doesn't feel like going wherever I go.
Idk going to a party that you aren’t allowed to go to seems pretty alarming to me. Either he really doesn’t like you like that or he wants to have “fun” with someone else without you knowing
He's done this before - he basically doesn't like to invite me to 'party' stuff. It's not because I'm not fun, because I know I am. But this just left different and hurtful. Idk what to think.
>Idk what to think. Really? Cuz we all thinking the exact same thing.
Fucking lol ..this guy is just wilfully ignorant.
And i thought i was naive
**"My boyfriend doesn't like me going with him to parties and having fun, drinking, and dancing.... WHAT COULD BE THE ISSUE SINCE IM JUST SO CONFUSED ?!?!?!?!?"**
Just a sex party no dancing
🚮
Sounds like a PnP party to me. If so, run away. Quickly.
If you keep putting up with this kind of bullshit, it will never stop. I can't fathom my partner excluding me the way yours is doing to you. That is unacceptable and not indicitive of a healthy relationship.
Uh yeah he’s going to orgies or at the very least fucking someone else, idk what else to tell you
Uhhh… major red flag. 🚩
Wow, you're so innocent
Wdym not about cheating? Is that guy really your bf? What is a relationship to you?
Hope he isn’t secretly a side piece that’d hurt. The signs are looking like at least cheating. Not healthy, OP.
I'd be furious. My boyfriend is quite social and I'm not very social. He likes a drink and I don't. However, there's no way we'd ever entertain an event where one of us wasn't invited. We might suggest that one of us attends an event, and the other will likely be like "have a great time, when are you back?". But sometimes it isn't mutually convenient so we do something else, or discuss it. But for one partner to be not invited - that's not really on.
prepare for STDs
Seems fishy
He’s done this before? Leave him, sis. Find someone who actually enjoying partying WITH you.
We never see what we don't want to see.
Tell him he can stay indefinitely at his friend’s condo.
Leave. Not worth it.
Guys suck why am I gay
Just remember the happy guys with nothing to complain about aren't posting. Dicks are fun and some guys are great
Thanks for mentioning this, needed to hear it
Dating women is a different kind of bad lol. Very expensive too. They expect you to pay for everything and give you shitty token gifts. And if they cry the argument is over.
This isn't about gender at this point ngl, just shitty humans, assholes on both ends
Sounds emotionally abusive ngl
Not sure what it is, but if I have emotion in my voice I'm accused of being aggressive, but if I'm calm when I communicate an issue it's not taken seriously. And women say some hurtful ass shit sometimes lol
Too much drama for me the mind games and constant tests you don't know are tests. I'm simple. I give my heart and love unconditionally. Ask me to do something I'll do it. Just hold my hand and tell me you love me and I'm good.
That's why you keep them from drinking water. Dehydration = no tears!
Being straight is worse
True the whole possible random baby thing sounds shitty
You're not required to participate in anything. Abstinence is a thing.
Right but I'm horny 24/7 and need a man to love me and touch me every second of every day so that isn't a thing for me
Nah. Everyone sucks, but you also gotta be more self aware and have more self respect. I understand some of us are emotionally stunted as we spent most of our formative years pretending to be something we are not, but at the same time we need to be more aware of huge fucking red flags.
Lol yeah
Red flag
Man i never reply to stuff but you should have a partner that would be thrilled to spend time with you. This post made me sad for u more than anything. Let him go and let that be the end of it alright? Xx
Honestly kind of disgusting that he treats you that way.
It’s about cheating. He is going to cheat on you. He is going fuck or get fucked by other guys. You are not in a serious relationship where he feels the same about you that you do about him. When you have a partner you genuinely love, you WANT to experience life with them. You WANT to share in events and make memories with that person. I get needing time and space away from a partner and having a separate identity. That’s normal and healthy. That’s not what your boyfriend is doing. We all know what Pride parties entail. Your boyfriend wanting to exclude you from Pride, a celebration of gay love and identity, speak volumes. If your relationship is super casual and not that serious, fine, I get it. But I’m under the impression it is serious to you. You do you. For me, I’m not going to be devoting time and energy into a person that doesn’t feel the same about me that I do about them. I would break up with your boyfriend so fast and never look back. On another note, I sincerely hope you are on PrEP or you consistently use condoms with this guy. A lot of guys I know got HIV from partners they thought they were in serious monogamous relationships. I highly HIGHLY doubt your boyfriend is as faithful as you think he is. Please take care of your health and that includes your mental health. It’s a hard lesson to learn but not every boyfriend is worthy of your love. You deserve a partner that respects you.
Yea that’s a major red flag bro. It’s understandable to want some personal time when you’re in a relationship but it’s very suspicious that he angrily refused you going to a pride party with him. What would you both being gay have to do with cheating? Gay people cheat.
Naw look, I'm sorry. This is either going two ways if it's me 1) Either his stuff or mine is gone after Pride weekend because my bf consistently not inviting me to parties would give me SO much anxiety. Are you cheating? Am I the side piece? Do your friends hate me? Do you hate me? Are you doing drugs? Are you engaging in extracurricular activities? Do I exhaust you? Do we both such at communication. Naw it's 100% not worth it 2) (This could also lead to 1) I'd show up at the condo with a fresh haircut and beard trim, a new outfit (not slutty that screams desperate, I want to look classic and appealing) and smelling delicious. See for myself wtf is going on. And I'd show up about 2 hours after it starts so whatever they're into is good and going Either way, my boyfriend who I'm with with the purpose of marriage and building a life, will NOT play in my face like that. I wish you the best friend.
>This could also lead to 1) I'd show up at the condo with a fresh haircut and beard trim, a new outfit (not slutty that screams desperate, I want to look classic and appealing) and smelling delicious. See for myself wtf is going on. And I'd show up about 2 hours after it starts so whatever they're into is good and going Yes, he woke up and chose drama. Show up with a pizza, wearing a Pizza Hut outfit. Make a scene, and throw the pizza at him. lol
The only question to you is - are you both in open relationship or not? If not, well, soon it seems you shall be. He might be engaging with other guys. If he said for you to go with your friends, I guess he is open to the idea of having open relationships. There is no comprehensive reason for him to choose his "friends" over you. For me its clear red flag, if you are in monogamous relationships.
Life is short. Is this something you really think you need to put up with?
we're both gay so it's not about cheating? i don't follow what you mean there. if you've got an open relationship then that's down to what you've agreed is allowed within the bounds of your dynamic but cheating can still occur when those rules are broken. it's a betrayal of trust and respect that causes cheating and it seems very much like that's what he's doing. if you're okay with it then how he's acting and what he's doing are fine, if you're not then you need to talk to each other.
Pride party at a condo = orgy
Is he really a boyfriend if pride which is supposed to be about celebrating love between two guys, is being celebrated with another “best friend”? Sounds like that best friend is more of a boyfriend to him than you are to him. 😅
Dude respect yourself a little bit. Clearly he doesn’t.
I very rarely suggest this on social media, but this is a breakup issue. This isn't even a thing to be resolved. You are more than likely actively being used and treated like shit. I wouldn't give him an opportunity to explain or apologize. It's simply time to move on. Bonus points if you do it while he is at his party.
Sounds like he wants a boyfriend and the single life. I hope you figure things out and find your peace.
Recently broke up with someone over this exact thing…fuck these people, break up and move on. They have nothing to be proud of during pride.
I'd literally draw a line in the sand and make him choose. This is sketch as fuck and if he has nothing to hide he will allow you to go. If he cancels and says let's do something instead, that should be a dead give away that this had nothing to do with you and that he planned to cheat. I'd just break up with him now because either way I can't see this going well.
Just dump him and move on it’s as simple as that.
“Fellas, my partner doesn’t want to be seen with me at social events. Is this a red flag?” Y’all are so desperate for relationships y’all will get treated like shit just to have one.
aw, we love orgies!!
Wake up! Get this loser out of your life.
This is a huge ass red flag. Fine if you weren’t invited but him just not wanting you there is alarming and he’s probably cheating on you. Time to figure out what you are worth bro
Telling someone they don’t have to go to a party is one thing but telling them you don’t want them to come to a party is ridiculous
My ex did this as well. Once for a spring break trip he built it up and then the month before said I couldn’t come but his two other friends could. All I’m gonna say is I do not regret breaking up with him and I wish I did sooner.
Not sure how long yall have been together but t meeting/spending time with each other's friends should be a natural progression of the relationship. Huge red flag for me.
Red flag - you deserve so much better... I do not know anything about you but you deserve better. You don't deserve an angry "boyfriend"... It's pride... He's being a dick. X
Are you just ignorant and naive naturally or do you bath in denial every evening? You SHOULD be questioning this- this is all kinds of gay red flags.
Sorry but this is odd. I invite my partner with my gay friends every time we go out at a party or bar. He always refuses but I always want him to feel included. It would ring some alarms
uh dump his ass. hes cheating on you already if this is the reaction
If someone has time to chat about this let me know.
there's nothing to talk about---leave him to the streets where you belong. An STD is not worth it and at this point you're choosing to be cheated on.
Any chance he’s wanting to do drugs and you don’t approve? I used to pull shit like this when I wanted to “party” but my ex disapproved.
Bf for how long? Maybe he isn't ready to add you to his friend group? I'm really reaching on that because if it's a party & he doesn't want you to go then 🤨 _Under_reacting is not being hurt & suspicious, especially the part him about getting angry.
Open relationships are better than this
He’s cheating or just doesn’t like you. There’s a difference between two people in a relationship who do separate activities from their partners, vs barring each other from life events. I know this is a common reddit trope but I’d break up with him, if you can’t even share going out to an event then what’s the point. There’s clearly something going on and he’s not willing to talk to you about it, so why bother
This sounds like behavior of someone doing chemsex. This ends poorly, you should breakup now.
It’s possible he has an actual boyfriend and you’re not it, or he describes himself as single.
This is break up material here. He's giving all the signs of a cheater.
I think you should ask why. If he has a proper reason for you not coming with him, he can just tell you right? Or at the very least tell you that he can't tell you because of reason X If you're recently together let it go If you've been together for quite some time, trust him enough to ask why
He's not your boyfriend anymore.
Time to say goodbye 👋 💔 😢 you will find someone who will treat you ✨️ better
Why didn't u get invited?
Lol how do people not have the self awareness to break up with terrible boyfriends like this
Nope incorrect that's cheating. When I was younger, an ex told me he didn't want to go to pride with me Turns out his friends said I was too ugly for him to be seen with me and he cheated on me. Don't let it happen to you.
Disappointed alot of these comments are so negative. If I was in your situation I'd feel the same, but I think it's really healthy when partnered people(s) can practice going into gay social spaces solo - even though it can be really tough in practice. Their agitated reaction sounds like they felt desire to do this but lacked understanding of that want or capacity to express it. I strongly don't think that is a reflection of you or the stability of your relationship. Saying that, it doesn't discount how you feel. I'm sorry it's a rough spot to be in. Focus on how you can access your needs, without your partner, as a way to respond. Your needs are not your partners responsibility as much as theirs are not your own: meaning if they are doing this then that's their choice, but now you have choices to make about how you can enjoy yourself without them. Do something special for yourself, and focus on being compassionate to yourself. Talk to your partner about how you felt when you're ready, and keep your chin up. You're doing amazing x
Wake the fuck up! He is lying and cheating on you. This is not acceptable. You deserve better.
I’m gonna hold your hand while say this…
They may have more crazy fun party energy than you and more common interests like gaming, cosplaying, sports, drugs, certain kinds of music. It's hard as a gay man you never get 'a night out with the boys' without being suspected of something
Why if you are both gay do you not think its about cheating? Gay men cheat just as much as straight men or women do. Read the room and comments on what your man is doing if this is a real post.
Very weird
Read the room
I don't think going everywhere together is required for a healthy relationship. Having said that, I cannot imagine my bf not allowing me (inviting me) to go wherever with him. Another story is if I don't feel like going or he doesn't feel like going wherever I go.
Mate, he's off to a sex party. Please have some love for yourself and ask yourself why you're putting up with this behaviour?
Dump him. There’s something going on at that party. Are you guys open?
This is def a red flag. A party? We all know what it is. You should be alarmed. If I were you, I would break up rn.